Hello my darlings. I would like to thank phhsdj, Falcon777, MindForgedMan, Meri Ley (Guest), OechsnerC, SherlockHolmes4884, Gingeraffealene, mersan123, Guardian of the Inheritance and gaylelbf for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.
Arlo thank you SherlockHolmes4884 for pointing out that the Coming of Arthur, Part 1 episode was in season 3, I looked at the dvd box and saw volume 2 and went with that. Oops.
So this is not the chapter I had planned to write, but it seemed it was the chapter that wanted to be written. As such, I hope you like it.
PLEASE READ AND ANSWER: I want to know if you want me to an in-depth retelling of the episodes (the coming of Arthur part 1 and 2) with this new dynamic of Merlin and Arthur, or if you want me to gloss over it, and just give the highlights. Let me know your thoughts please!
Disclaimer: I don't own Merlin.
Morgana watched as Merlin and Arthur left. She had overheard the conversation between Uther and her brother the previous evening and she had been tempted to contact Morgause. Surely a magical artefact like the cup of life should be in the hands of those who were trained to control it. Who could use it, rather than leaving it to sit on some dusty shelf in the vaults of the castle. But she decided against it. Morgause was busy working on Cenred, making sure he would stand down from the war he wanted to start with Camelot, and if the reaction to the patrol was anything to go by, then her sister had her work cut out for her. So she would leave the retrieval of the cup in Merlin's hands. Surely as Emrys, he had the same right as a high priestess to the cup, and surely he knew how much it would need to be protected. It was then with a startling clarity that she realised she trusted him. She trusted Merlin. Oh maybe not with her heart, or anything personal, but she trusted him with this. She trusted him with magic. Trusted in his magic. Trusted him with the fate of her people. Of course she had known abstractly that was the case when she had promised she would still side with Arthur, but it was only now, watching as her brother and the man she… Merlin rode out that she knew it deep inside her. Knew with all of her being that Merlin would never betray the vision she had seen, never betray the kingdom he and Arthur would build.
Morgana turned from the window to sit on her bed and wonder about that. Was it that she was starting to forgive him for what he had done? No. She could never forgive him for breaking her heart… but maybe reading the diary of the long forgotten knight she was starting to understand exactly what weight he carried on those slim shoulders. Of course she still had questions, and no way to find the answers, not then. But she wasn't blind, and nor was she stupid. In the days while Merlin and Arthur had been away she had been doing a lot of thinking. She had worked out who it was that had stopped all the visions she had had before they had come true. If Merlin was as powerful as the druids believed, then it was more than possible that it had been him, in fact it was highly likely. She couldn't help the self-deprecating laugh that escaped her lips. She and Morgause would never have stood a chance against him. She saw that now.
But that didn't stop her worrying about the words she had read and still did not understand. Still she worried about how Merlin would be her destiny and her doom. And sitting there she realised that she was also worried for her brother and his friend. Worried for the two men who had gone into danger with nothing more than each other as protection. "Oh goddess, please let them return unharmed." She whispered into the silent room. Because the idea that they would not return was not one she could never contemplate. Not now. Not after all she had seen and learnt.
Gwen was walking slowly up the stairs to her mistress, no her friends, quarters to start her day. She was worried. She and Arthur had barely spoken in the few days he had been back, and now he was gone again. She didn't know why or where he was going, only that Merlin was his only companion. She knew it was dangerous, knew that there was a possibility he might never return. There always was when he went off on a quest. It tore at her that she couldn't let anyone know how much pain she was in. That she had to go about her daily duties as if nothing was wrong, as if the man she loved wasn't out there fighting for their kingdom.
She quietly made her way into Morgana's chambers, only to hear whispered words. She couldn't make them out but it made her head come up and her eyes dart around to see if Morgana was performing any magic. To see if she was doing anything that would harm the ones they loved. But all she saw was her friend, looking retched sitting on her bed and her heart went out to her.
"Morgana." She said as she rushed to her side, putting an arm around the lady as she turned to her and, much to Gwen's surprise, started to cry.
Gwen didn't know what to do, so she just held the lady. Let the tears soak into her shoulder as she whispered soothing words which had no meaning. She did not know why Morgana was so upset, but she could think of only one reason. Therefore when the lady had calmed somewhat, Gwen pulled away so she could look into her friends eyes. "Did you have a nightmare?" She asked gently, not wanting to bring back to her mind whatever it was that had caused such a server reaction in the strong lady Morgana.
At Gwen's question Morgana stilled. Not because Gwen had asked it, but more because she knew she hadn't. There had been no vision of danger preceding Arthur's quest. Surely that was a good thing. Surely the goddess would tell her if her brother was in danger? Therefore pulling herself together she took a deep breath before she answered. "No. No nightmare."
"Then, may I ask, what has upset you, my lady?" Gwen replied cautiously not wanting to cross the narrow line she walked when Morgana was in one of her moods.
Morgana was about to say no. Dismiss Gwen with a wave of her hand before something caught in her mind. It was a vision she had once had. The vision of the girl at her side marrying Arthur. Of her becoming her queen and sister. She turned to Gwen with that thought in her mind and saw her in a new light. Saw her walking up the aisle in a purple dress before kneeling before Arthur. Saw her take his hand and face the kingdom as his equal. It was then she realised that Gwen knew nothing of what was going on. Oh she knew she knew of Merlin's magic, and no doubt Arthur had talked to her about that. But her friend knew nothing of her own. Did not know of the magic she held. Merlin had Arthur to defend him when the time came to tell the court of his powers, who did she have at her side? And looking at the friend at her side she realised she could have the queen. Merlin could have the king, but she would have the queen. If Gwen accepted Merlin, surely she would accept her too.
With that Morgana took another deep breath before turning with an honest smile on her face. It was time to tell her friend who she really was, and tell her that she would be standing at her side for as long as she wished it. As Merlin would be at Arthur's side, she would be at Gwen's. That felt right somehow. That she would have someone to help and protect with the gifts the goddess gave her. Yes, she would help Arthur become king, but when he did she would take on the role of protecting and guiding the woman he loved.
"I do not have nightmares, Gwen. They are visions of the future. I am a seer. I have magic." Morgana said in a calm voice, it was one she had not used for a long time as it was the one she had had before she had spent a year with her sister. It was the voice of a friend.
Gwen sat back at those words and carefully placed her hands in her lap. She knew something monumental was happening here, but she did not know what it was. She had known of Morgana's magic, and she had worried about it. But she had been convinced that Merlin could get her to join them. But now, now Merlin and Morgana were not speaking and her friend was declaring her skills to her. Did she want her to side with her? Or was it that she finally trusted Gwen enough to share her secret? Gwen knew that what she said next would define what was to come of the relationship her and her mistress, no her friend, had. So taking a deep breath she asked what she hoped was the right thing.
"Did you see Arthur and Merlin in danger?"
"No." Morgana replied breathing out as she relaxed. Gwen had not seemed scared, nor had she accused her of working against them. She had been nothing more than the friend she knew, worried about those she cared for.
"That is good news." Gwen responded with a smile before continuing. Now Morgana was opening up she wasn't about to stop. "Why were you crying?"
"I… it's too much. I have done terrible things, Gwen. I have manipulated everyone here with the aim to gain the throne for myself. And only Merlin knew. But he is no better than me. He lied. He had magic and he never told me. He left me alone, and then when I turned to someone who understood he poisoned me. He killed me Gwen, and then… and then convinced me to love him. He ruined everything. Stood in the way of every plan. And now, now he is going to be the king's right hand and I, his sister, am going to be nothing. I cannot be nothing, Gwen. I will not be nothing. I will not sit back and let him decide the fate of our people. He may be Emrys, but he has no rights. He has stood by too long to decide what is to become of us all. He is not our saviour. He is not a hero. I will not let him become my doom." When Morgana finished she was breathing heavily. She had not thought before the words came streaming out of her, and not thought about who she was speaking to or what she was saying. She just… she needed to let it out.
Gwen sat back at the stream of words, trying to work out what they all meant, what it was Morgana was saying, but she did not have any reference to go against. She had no idea of what her friend was trying to say. Therefore she asked about the only thing she had grasped. "You are trying to gain the throne, for yourself?"
At her words Morgana turned to her and saw the disgust and hurt in her eyes. She wanted to remove it. That wasn't what she had meant, not now. "No. Gwen, please believe me. I know Arthur is the king this kingdom needs, my people as well as yours. I mean him no harm." She begged as she moved to kneel in front of her friend grasping her hands in hers.
"But you did." Gwen replied. It was not a question. Everything made sense to her now.
"Yes." Morgana whispered anguish in her eyes as she did so. She knew her friend would never be able to forgive her for wanting to harm the man she loved.
"But not now." Gwen replied looking at the emotions she could see in Morgana's eyes. She didn't know what had happened to change her mind, though she suspected it was a certain manservant/sorcerer. But seeing that she knew Morgana was once more on their side.
"No." Morgana responded with more strength this time. Head held high as she said the word, confirming her allegiance to Arthur to the one who would one day be his queen.
"Then there is no need to talk about the past. It is over, we cannot change it. We can only fight for the future we want. And Morgana, I want you in that future, at my side as we fight for our friends and kingdom." Gwen replied squeezing Morgana's hands in hers and smiling at her friend, so glad she was on their side. She didn't know what was to come, but she knew having Morgana with them could do nothing but improve their odds against those trying to bring Arthur down.
"You are going to make a great queen, Guinevere." Morgana responded standing as she smiled at her friend, chuckling to herself a how her cheeks coloured at the words.
"Oh, no. That's not-" Gwen tried to protest. She was a servant, there was no way she could ever become queen. It just wasn't possible. The best she could ever hope for was to become Arthur's mistress, she knew that. But it didn't stop the dreams she had in the dark of the night of them being together forever.
"It is. I've seen it. You will look gorgeous in purple as you take your husbands hand as his wife." Morgana interrupted pleased by the look of shock that her words caused to cross Gwen's face. Not because she was shocked, but more because that reaction showed her as nothing else would that her friend believed her about her abilities. Believed she did indeed see the future.
"You have?" Gwen whispered before shaking her head. That was not important now. "Tell me everything, if you wish." She instead said, wanting to know all her friend had been through, wanting to know who her friend surely was.
"Very well, though you might want to get us both breakfast. I think this may take a while. "Morgana replied with a nod. It was time to let someone else know all she had been through, and who better than the one who had been by her side through it all?
And that was how not much later the two ladies found themselves sat together over breakfast as Morgana told her story to Gwen. Told her about her visions, about how she had told Merlin of her magic and he had tried to get her to the druids to get help, about how she has arranged Uther's death in revenge of Gwen's father, and how she had finally turned to Morgause when it became too much for her to handle. She left nothing out of her story, and in the end she gave Gwen the book Geoffrey had given her to show her the prophecy of Arthur and Emrys. She left out that Merlin was the warlock spoken in the text, but she knew her friend worked that out easily enough. It was not her secret to tell, but if Gwen figured it out, then it wasn't her fault, now was it?
And Gwen listened stunned at what she heard. Stunned at all that had been going on that she missed. She wondered how she hadn't seen it, thought she knew she had suspected Morgana when she returned. The true extend of her feelings for Camelot went far further than Gwen could ever have imagined, and she once again couldn't help but thank whatever deity that it that had brought Merlin to them. Not the least because of how he had changed Morgana's mind so that now she was behind Arthur all the way. Gwen could not imagine a world where Morgana would be their enemy and she was so glad she wouldn't have to.
All she had to do now was repair the relationship between her two closet friends. From Morgana's words she could see they were closer entwined than even she had believed, and the feelings they had for each other were obvious through the words spoken. Morgana still loved Merlin, but she could not trust him. And Gwen hearing things from her side, couldn't help but understand that feeling. She wasn't sure she would be able to trust him after all the betrayal they had both been party to. She just hoped that eventually they would be able to put the past behind them. Because she knew that if they did, together they would be a force to be reckoned with in the world, and the love they could spread would reach everyone. If only they could give each other a chance, if only they would let themselves love. And as she sat there talking with her friend without barriers for the first time in their lives, her mind turned to ways she could help them get together, help them find the happiness she hoped to share with Arthur, one day. They deserved it just as much as they did after all.