Chapter 7 – Date Night

Red and blue, melting shirts dying her soul. A giggle, a howling laugh. Morning frost that carried them away. Memories flickering through her mind tinted pink. The red on daddy's hands. Mother, black and blue. Daddy's little monster.

A sharp intake of breath and Harley was back in the present sitting in the back of the car with her puddin's arms wrapped around her. Her grin hummed when she caught his eye. He'd left her to swim in her memories but now that sneer that should have sent her running lured her closer. Her skin was prickling, a burn and an itch as Harleen peeled away to reveal Harley beneath.

"Whatcha' thinkin' about Mr J?" She asked in her sing-song voice happy laughter applauding her question. He growled to her but did not answer, eyes casting far away. But Harley didn't mind. He could do whatever he wanted. He cared about her, which was all she needed. She'd proved herself and proved to herself that she was right. Mr J loved her.

Happy home. She walked unabashedly into the safe house where a few of Joker's goons turned to stare against their better judgement. Her clothes were peeling away with her skin which was itching something fierce. As she stopped to scratch her arms Joker took the lead, escorting her upstairs. He shoved her under a shower and she shrieked when the cold water hit. For all his comments on his skin being numb she wasn't suffering the same affliction.

But the cold chased away the burn, acid gurgling down the drain. Then Joker was with her, peeling his clothes away and then his hands cupped her head, lips pressed against hers. Pink flickered through and she giggled at a man in a straight jacket. Cute little kitty waving. She took her medicine like a champ, kissing Joker back just as fierce. She'd earned this. This was hers.

Like an addict she breathed deep, relishing every second of finally having her hit. Her eyes rolled as Puddin' showered affection over her, a content sigh following them out of the bathroom to the bedroom beyond.

The beauty of her insanity was that she was lulled to sleep afterwards by flickering versions of her memories, each one more delightful than the last. Her skin still prickled as she drifted off but a smile was spread across her face like a permanent fixture.

Joker chewed on his thoughts as he watched her sleep. Some punchline this was; his thoughts were tough, overcooked. Unappetising. Oh, there was fun to be had in beautiful women, especially crazy beautiful women. But this was never his intention. He growled under his breath. Why hadn't he been able to abandon her? Why had he felt that irritating tug to turn around and go after her?

She mumbled in her sleep, shifting closer, drawing a startled breath out of a man thought mad as an old, old memory flickered up from the abyss. For one brief second his hand hovered over her shoulder, anticipating comfort and that thing, that word he didn't believe in. But then he snarled and shoved her away, storming out of the room. His masterpiece didn't even wake up from her sugar coated dreams.

Batman worked hard to track him down. It was a good game of cat and mouse. But since Joker had been an excellent host, leaving party favours around the city Batman had been a bit distracted. It was all good fun. The latest report from the tattoo shop he was currently residing in had stated that good ol' Bats hadn't managed to save a single one of them. Poor Bats.

Chuckling to himself Joker's happy mood was interrupted. Harley had woken up. Slinking down from their bedroom above her grin was directed at him and then it shifted to the people around them. His men looked about uneasily. He knew that some of them appreciated the odd glance but since he'd brought her home, skin peeling to reveal the deranged monster beneath, a lot of them just tried to avoid her. Joker was infamous for his unpredictability; Harley took it to a whole other level. He could see it when he watched her. A change in expression, the vacant stare when she was lost in a memory; which memory determined her mood when she came out. Sometimes she giggled, laughed, kissed and played. Sometimes she came out angry, swinging her bat, her hammer, any weapon she could get her hands on. If they were lucky she just broke things; the unlucky ones got their bones broken.

But the ones that intrigued him the most, the funny little thing she did that caught his attention was when she was sad. Some memory that made her look a little like that lost puppy that had drowned in the acid. She came out vindictive from those candy coloured dreams. Then she cut with words; pulled his men apart and bruised their insides. They became disarmed by her insight and wary of these moments. Not too unlike how he felt; cautious of this thing, this tumour that attached itself to him. The one he wanted to cut away but just couldn't.

"How you doin' Miss Quin?" His cold glare moved to Lawrence. This kid was new blood; stupid blood. Was he playing at brave face or really that ignorant? Joker was tempted to teach him a lesson, trigger finger itchy but he held back his bared fangs as he watched Harley giggle and eye the young man playfully. She liked the attention. Eyes on me.

Nate was getting a new tattoo while Frost was reporting to Mr J, information needed for the next takeover. If you want to do bigger productions you need a bigger stage and he still hadn't got his old one back; not quite. Not until he had the big clubs up and running again could he work on his next performance. Couldn't hold his next masterpiece on the smaller stages, no siree. That was too rude to good ol' Bats.

Nate had worked with Joker long enough to say nothing when the tattoo gun was wrenched away from his artist and his seat taken by the clown prince of crime. Harley's happy giggles turned into a gasp of pain, her puddin' gripping a little too hard as he yanked her over to him and began to draw on her back, needle pricking into her skin.

But she moaned into it. Eying Mr J over her shoulder like she was in on the joke. Like they had their own secret world. As reality flickered like an aerial TV not getting enough signal he began to consider that they just might.

He seemed focused on his work on her skin though he spent the hours acknowledging the information Frost gave him and issuing orders. When he did finally draw away Harley took the gun from him and started to etch more designs into her thighs. If she was going to return the favour one day she needed to get good at it. She had to be perfect for her puddin'.

"Daddy's got to duck out for you sweetheart." Joker's velvet voice interrupted, chasing away the candy colours buzzing at the edges of her mind. Harley's mouth hung open in a confused 'huh' when reality came back and she stared after her Mr J getting ready to leave.

"Puddin', I can come with you. I could take my bat, some extra guns. Make it a proper date night if I get dressed up pretty." She begged, clinging to him like a leech. A smirk tugged at the corner of Joker's mouth; how had he made this beautiful mess of a human?

"Oh, darlin', next time. I need you to be a good little girl and stay home. Put some dinner on for when I get back, okay?" He purred sneering into a kiss that she greedily took.

"Love you Mr J." She bid farewell, Joker hefting the machine gun he'd loaded as he lead his troop out the door. If she cared that he didn't respond she didn't show it.

Joker breathed out in something that might have been construed as a sigh but it came off more like a snarl. He could still smell the burnt gunpowder in the air, red and blue chasing after them like the cops cared about the thugs they'd taken care of. But that was the boring part of the story. The interesting part, the really juicy bit was the morsel they'd gotten out of the police officer already on the scene. Lawrence was one of theirs. A no-good cop dolled up all nice as a gang member. They needed to track him, to move. He'd know about the threat of his cover being blown, he'd have moved. And if he'd passed along intel Bats probably had it too and oh, good ol' Bats was gunning for Mr J. Really wanted to thank him for that gift basket but the house wasn't ready for guests.

"Find out where he is and bring him to me." Joker ordered Frost as they returned to the tattoo parlour. They were here to get a few things or so Mr J had said. He wouldn't admit that there was only one thing he really cared about picking up, the notion even crossing his fragmented mind sent frustration through the shattered pieces. His internal sneer glaring back from the shards.

The thoughts drifted away like disturbed smoke when he opened the door to his bedroom. Harley grinned back at him dressed in an apron with a diamond print covering a tiny outfit of red and blue.

"Welcome home puddin'. I was just tenderising dinner." She greeted, slinking over to shower her puddin' with her devotion. 'Dinner' was Lawrence tied to a chair in the middle of the room. He'd clearly been tortured. Bruised, bleeding, and a look of utter defeat in his eyes. A car battery had been placed on the table next to him showing that the Mrs was just about to start cooking. A good ol' floss of the brain made for good prep work.

Joker's laugh came out as a breath of surprise at first. Wonder filling his eyes as he looked at what his darling had prepared for him before that deranged howl of laughter came bellowing out in an unnerving cry. How she'd found out he had no clue; maybe she hadn't and was just having a bit of fun but it made him grab her head and kiss her hard.

"You're just so…" That squeak of amazement again. When would Harley stop surprising him with how well she fit at his side?

She hummed in delight, prancing over to circle Lawrence, trailing her hands along him to insight a whimper. But her eyes were on Mr J.

"Hello Lawrence. Or should I say Officer Martin?" He purred taking his time to approach the man in the chair. He began to cry through his gag, the once pretty face swelling from a bruise on his left eye, blood trailing from his nose. She'd been thorough. "It seems I need to reteach the lesson to everyone that you don't put on a show for Joker. He puts on a show for you."

Frost had heard the howls of pain and now he stood outside like the loyal watchdog as Harley and Joker had their fun. The Clown Prince would still move home base soon but not before attaching Officer Martin to the battery Harley had prepared. No relaxants or sedatives, his body convulsed against the binds while Joker rewarded his masterpiece for her devotion. Greedily she drank him in, clawing at his clothes, his skin, trying to pull him so close they became one. The stench of burnt flesh wafted over to them on the other side of the room.

"Mmm. Smells like dinner's ready Harley." He purred, moving over to remove the cables from the long deceased Lawrence. Whatever he'd intended to do, Harley interrupted him dragging his attention back to her.

"But I want to have dessert instead." She cooed trying to pout around her grin. Joker happily obliged his princess.

They continued to elude Bats and bring chaos back to Gotham; not that the city needed their help all that much but Joker and Harley; that was a different bag of cats.

Meanwhile Joker found himself becoming more and more obsessed with his latest plaything. Or was it an old plaything? Did it count as new when he pulled it apart and put it back together to his own liking? These thoughts were peppered throughout flashes of red and blue, two colours that had chased him for so long they felt like home as Harley straddled his lap. He enjoyed his morning wake up calls, the singsong of her voice no longer grating. Most of the time.

"Mr J." A voice interrupted. Not Frost's, he knew better but the flip had been switched and Joker saw the look in Harley's eye change.

"Don't interrupt!" She shrieked and a knife she'd had hidden somewhere went hurtling across the bedroom to the doorway, sticking his goon in the shoulder. Harley chased after it, puppy playing fetch and Joker slumped black, one hand floating through the air in frustrated disbelief that she was about to kill another henchman. He was running out of the ones that weren't loyal just out of fear.

"Doctor." He growled and Harley immediately looked back. No, no, not that word. Not when she'd been watching the red flowers bloom, making a bouquet of the man who'd dared interrupt her alone time with puddin'. She cowed more from the term than from the rough way he snatched her back, twisting her arm painfully as he hissed threat into her ear. Daddy used to grab mummy like that. Harley grinned, cotton candy colours playing memories back to her and Joker let her go. No use disciplining her when her mind was elsewhere.

He growled to himself as her giggles lead her over to him, taking back her place on his lap like nothing had happened. He was disturbed by the way his anger had relented to…something. What horrible circumstance would change his frustration to fondness? He kept his gaze on her as he contemplated this terrible fascination but gestured to Frost hovering around the door to say his piece.

"We got the Madhouse and some generous cash flow to our allies. A few others would like to welcome you back to Gotham's elite." Frost advised before being brushed away to make the necessary preparations. Joker's mind hovered over plans, stage-plays, jokes, everything else for a little while before it was right back where it always went. Red and blue vying for his attention.

When night rolled around Joker and Harley had dressed up pretty; he'd promised her they'd go on a date night once he'd finished some business. She could dance and play with the others while he did what he had to. He'd call her if he needed her. He kissed the heart he'd marked on her cheek that night where they'd had dessert before following Frost to his throne room.

And oh how the peasants paid fealty to their Clown Prince. Honeyed words and sparkling gifts. All of them uneasy though some put on better masks than others. As the night wore on he found his eye drifting longer and longer to the ballerina twirling in her music box; black and gold diamonds and a grin. But her eyes weren't on him, why weren't they on him? They were meant to always be on him. He restrained his growl for once. Maybe he needed to floss his brain. There was something wrong with it.

His eyes remained transfixed as his final knight came to bow to the Clown Prince. T-Pain. What a name. Standard thug. Nothing like the carnival of nutters that were becoming common in Gotham. But he had good contacts. Ones Mr J could use as Bats was getting closer and closer to his tail.

Frost was quick to offer advice to the thug sparing Joker the effort. It had gotten boring.

"Hey J." He greeted once he'd sat down failing to drag the green haired man's attention away from his dancing princess. "On behalf of everybody, welcome back." He continued like he wasn't being ignored. "I wanted to come by and personally say thank you. You're making me good money; I'm making you good money.

"Are you sweet talking me?" Joker finally responded pulling out his act. What a character. He laughed through his smile at this movie-star thug. "I love this guy." He informed Frost, leaning forward to check T-Pain out. Yes, this was a man used to looking intimidating. Used to being top dog in a normal world. But Gotham had long abandoned normal. "He's so intense." Joker added with delight. Uncomfortable T-Pain removed his glasses more for something to do than actual intent. His indecisive response was distracted when awe shouted out from the crowds on the dance floor. Harley had done something and now the thug was appreciating her with an approving hum.

"You're a lucky man. You got a bad bitch." He commended, unable to take his eyes off of Harley's dancing.

A spark of something shot through Joker. Some twisted feeling that made him sick, flipping a switch somewhere in his brain. How dare he.

"Oh, that she is." Joker began theatrics ready to go as he raised a hand like a preaching man to gesture at his plaything. He didn't take his eyes off T-Pain who soon glanced back in confusion and apprehension as Joker slowly stood up.

"The fire in my loins, the itch in my crotch." He growled it out not because of that feeling, that one that threatened T-Pain but his own frustrations at how obsessed he'd become with that dancing she-devil. Even Frost was put-off by Joker's next performance as he introduced the main player in his next act.

"The one, the only, the infamous Harley Quinn!" Joker called out before watching his goddess lose herself in a memory of red roses. But she listened for his whistle and even amidst memories and revelries she made her way over to her Mr J. T-Pain took his shot, clearly beginning to realise his mistake and showing his regret in his discomfort.

"Oh, come to daddy." Joker greeted as Harley made her way to his throne, glittering gold. His plaything, his masterpiece.

"Puddin'" She professed, grin on her face and eager to please. She'd play her part so well, he knew she would. She was just so good.

"Listen. You are my gift to this handsome hunka-hunka!" He made sure to accentuate his theatre with the proper gestures, dusting a hand through his hair as he tried to hold back the psychotic rage burning at the edges of his mind now. He could hardly wait for this punchline.

"You belong to him now." Mr J declared and grinning happily Harley played a good little girl, growling and snapping playfully at her new master.

"You're cute." She exclaimed, sitting in his lap like an obedient 'bad bitch'. "You want me? I'm all yours." She promised with a laugh before glancing back to Mr J as if she was in on his joke.

But Joker, he was struggling with something. Something disgusting, frustrating. Something that made his skin burn and itch worse than acid. This raging jealousy that made it hard to breathe as he watched his Harley flirt with someone else. T-Pain wasn't fool enough to take Harley or Joker up on their offer. He kept his eyes locked on Mr J, his intense presence having vanished as the crazy pair could see fear in his eyes. You never showed fear to wild beasts.

"I don't want no beef." He cautioned but it was already far too late.

"You don't want no beef?" Joker repeated, again and again like the sentence was echoing in his skull trying to find the right tone of voice for it. He heard it over and over, like a lightning rod begging to direct this unbridled frustration seeping into his skin and tearing at an already deranged psyche. She was his plaything. He'd made her. And no one else could have her. No one.

"Why? What's wrong? You don't like me?" Harley asked, acting perfectly. "Fine, don't waste my time then." She stalked away like she was offended. But Harley couldn't keep up the act, not when she knew what was coming next.

"This your lady." T-Pain tried to excuse but it wasn't enough. Oh, no, not for her Mr J. The switch had been flipped. You could flip it back but the outcome might be worse. That was the joy in it. Harley couldn't even keep on a mask of pretence anymore. Though she subdued her excitement at seeing puddin' at work she could not stop the grin from spreading across her face as she sat down.

"Look." Joker started completely ignoring the woman who had thrown him so far out of character. "Are you enjoying yourself?" The warning smile, the disarming attempt at pleasantness that always came off as wolfish. Harley giggled in anticipation as she watched that fear dig deeper into the thug's spine until it really had a hold on him.

"No…" He tried to soothe, backing away. "That's your lady, Joker."

"That's right." Puddin' acknowledged with a laugh. Oh, T-Pain had no idea. That lady, that annoying little barb pricking his heart that he just couldn't get rid of. The tell, the hand through the hair as Joker became resigned to the fact that there would never be a Mr J without a Harley Quinn. Not anymore.

"Yo', J-" It was all T-Pain got out before Joker tried to vent his frustrations with pretty red roses.

"Ohhh, a bouquet. You shouldn't have puddin'." Harley cooed over the roses. Such a great present for date night. She was laughing, trying to show them off to cold, little Jack Frost but then her puddin' had dragged her away.

Bubblegum colours flashed. She was dancing; there was fire, anger, acid burning her nose. She was laughing at a strong man at the circus. She was dressed in the cutest black and red outfit when a clown came to dance with her. Then there was the rev of an engine and she laughed again, bumper cars.

Blue and red lights flashed in her eyes and Harley came back just as the cop car chasing Mr J took a tight turn too fast and crashed into a shop. They laughed together and speeding past the other cars they went.

Joker eyed her; this masterpiece he'd created. Testing her reactions as he drifted too close, drove into oncoming traffic. There was no fear in her expression though. Just that puppy adoration for him and his thrill for chaos, for uncertainty mirrored in her eyes. He laughed some more.

"Come on puddin'. Do it!" She begged the closer they got to crashing. But date night was to get a third wheel. He spotted the vehicle of his gracious host barrelling behind them.

"Oh. We have got company." He told his darlin' with delight and she smiled in return.

"Batsy, basty, basty." It was a purr. A promise to do whatever he asked. A reminder that she had played a part in the gift basket that had the masked vigilante so hot on his tail.

A thud on the roof told them their old friend had arrived much sooner than intended. Cat and mouse hadn't finished playing yet.

Harley growled, more annoyed by this than Mr J and reached for one of his pistols without a hint of request.

"Stupid Bats. You're ruining date night!" She cried out in frustration. This was her time with Mr J. Batman had to wait. Come play another day. She fired, barely even registering how she'd amused her puddin' with her ruthless response.

A swerve of the car that filled the air with the scent of burnt rubber redirected Harley's attention from the roof and she checked where Joker was heading. The guard rail for what might have once been a pleasant ocean walk greeted her and no amount of insanity could stop the fear that entered her head.

"Puddin'." She tried to call to him but his foot was as cement. "Puddin', I can't swim!" Came her scream of terror, applauded by the impact of the water, the glass shattering between the ocean and her body thrown forward. Candy hues tried to filter into the world but black tendrils moved faster, her vision blurring as her head stung fierce.

Joker saw this. Any other man would have entertained the thought of taking her with him but even a Mr J as tormented by this parasite as he was, was quick to discard her. The closest thing to consideration was the moment where, as he escaped alone and began to swim away, he left a dagger in her hand.

Harley watched the merman disappear into the ocean, clutching his gift in her hand; she saw the flash of a knife and smiled a little to herself. The moment played back with pink hues, a hand touching the top of her head like her father's. Daddy's little monster. She went to rest through the window of the car.

A memory of normal. Of the doctor. But it didn't last, didn't stay for more than a moment. She felt someone lift her head and her hand tightened around the knife. Ignorant to her underwater state, she snarled and lashed out, not going down without a fight. But she was nothing to Batman. One quick hit to an already foggy head and she was down for the count.

She would awake to play with the Bats. Taunt him in every way she knew how. Prod and poke and pick him apart in the hopes that she'd get him to break his stupid code. He took her to her cell and she laughed all the way. Right up until Batman pointed out that she was in it by herself. Soaked through and all alone. Where was her puddin'?

((A/N: Sorry for the long delay with this one. I had intended to finish it and have it posted soon after getting back from holiday but came back and had to hit the the ground running at work and just never got time to get this done. I think the stress of that may have ruined this chapter a bit. I feel like I lost their inner voices a bit more here.

It's still fun to write a disconnected Harley though. A bit hard to show a Joker infatuated because I feel like a part of him does love her but he rejects that part in most incarnations bar this one that seems to have embraced it in his own twisted way. Trying to portray that is tricky. Hope I'm still doing them some justice.

Just a very short epilogue left that should be up in a week or so. Thanks for coming on the ride those few of you that have. And again, constructive criticism is cherished.))