The perfect date Chapter 19: I deserve this, an inuyasha fanfic

Chapter 19: I deserve this

Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha

"Of course…" He said and she stood up straight putting a hand through her hair. She didn't know why she was so self conscious all of a sudden. She never in her life felt so depressed or overwhelmingly sad, but she put on a face. She was good at that. She had done it all through her child hood. Sesshomaru watched her as she tried to repair her image in her usual pristine way. She didn't say anything as she walked forward towards his door. He backed up allowing her to go in before him. She had her coat wrapped around her arms in complete nervousness. She didn't understand what she was doing. She knew she didn't want to be alone, but she was surprised that that simple sentiment could drag her all the way into Sesshomaru's room. It wasn't as if she wanted to do anything with him, but she knew now she was sort of obligated to, and that was surprisingly okay with her.

He looked down at his watch as she looked around his hotel room like it was the first time she set foot in it. It was now around three in the afternoon, plenty of time before the dinner reservation. "So…" He said grabbing her attention. She turned around facing him. The makeup on her face had been completely washed off, but she never really needed it. She was still extremely gorgeous, she did falter somewhat under his stare. She was now looking on the floor instead of meeting his eyes.

"I must look awful right now…" She said putting a hand on her face. He looked her over before walking past her towards the kitchen nook.

"Well that's what happens when you let yourself be weak." He said, and he knew it wasn't the nicest thing to say or maybe not the appropriate thing to say, but he was never good at that. He wasn't great at articulating things in order to make people feel better, comforting wasn't his forte.

"Yeah…I guess so." She agreed to his surprise, and he realized something in her. He didn't know what it was before, but for some odd reason she was completely grateful to him. All he did was allow her to stay in his room, and now she felt as if she owed him something. She walked forward as he looked into the hotels fridge. It was already stocked with some groceries but they were all foods that weren't easily perished. He wasn't going to bother eating any of it. They all had to be prepared before consumption, but off to the side was a small compartment for wines and champagnes. He took one out reading through the label. It was an awful year, entirely too recent, but it would do.

He turned around towards the cabinets getting out two wine glasses. He opened the bottle and poured it into the glasses while trying to find something to say. It wasn't like he was stuck on conversation starters, but it was just that most of them involved around his brother and he knew she didn't want to talk about him. He had seen Inuyasha walking down the stairs when he came into the hotel. He knew how upset he was because he hadn't notice him at all. If there was one thing that he knew about his younger brother, it was that when he was distressed about something emotionally, his senses were dramatically altered. He remembered when they were younger he'd frequently get in arguments with their father. Depending on how drastic the feud was Inuyasha would be completely dead to the world. He would be emotionally stuck on the matter. He'd usually go somewhere where he could be alone, but this was severely different. He was stuck on an affair of the heart, and just like Kagome he probably didn't want to be alone.

He turned away from the counter and walked down towards her. She was sitting on his bed. Her coat was still wrapped around her arms, and he knew she was extremely nervous. He didn't understand why. He never led her to believe that he wanted her in a physical way. He did find her physically attractive, and if she asked he wouldn't hesitate, but he knew better then to make the first move. But even though he wasn't planning on doing anything, she sat there agitated while twirling her coat around. He stared at her for a moment placing both glasses on his desk. He walked over to her and she gulped silently. "Can I take that…?" He said referring to her jacket. She nodded relaxing herself somewhat and then passing it towards him. He turned away and set the coat on the back of his chair. He then grabbed the glasses of wine and walked towards her passing one to her.

She took it without much fuss, but she had no intentions of drinking. She didn't drink, and after the bar incident with Inuyasha she defiantly wasn't going to do it again. She looked down at it though, carefully moving the glass and forcing the liquid to move slightly. She didn't say a word, and just the simple movement held her attention for awhile. He had walked back to his desk, his hands on some manila colored folders, he was looking through them. "So…" He said and she looked up staring at his back. "Did you enjoy yourself today?" He asked and she sat up at that.

"Uh…yeah…" She said. She played with her fingers suddenly thinking of what else to say. "I had a lot of fun…thank you." She said and he nodded, though he didn't really understand what she was thanking him for. He didn't say anything else, he was reading over something, he had no idea the room had just gotten extremely awkward with silence. "And uh…your parents…" She said suddenly wanting to save the conversation. "Your mom…she's so…so beautiful." She admitted, and though she wanted to say just nice, the words that she'd been truly thinking of slipped out.

He paused for a moment standing still before picking up a folder and walking over to his brief case. "You think so…" He stated. He was at this point humoring her. He had work to actually do, but he wasn't going to kick her out. He had a lot to benefit from having Kagome on his side, so if he had to pick up some broken pieces along the way, so be it. He placed the case on top of his desk and opened it. She had positioned herself towards him, trying to figure out the appropriate things to say to continue the conversation.

"Yeah…of course don't you think so?" She asked and Sesshomaru shrugged suddenly. He wasn't going to answer that, he thought the whole conversation was a bit trivial, though he didn't show it. "And she's really nice…"

"Yeah well it's really hard to find the woman who raised you from birth attractive… don't you think." He stated and he could hear her laugh nervously behind him. "But that's my family…why don't you tell me about yours?" He asked while turning around. He moved his seat around to face her. As soon as she had his total attention she got even more nervous. She didn't seem like she wanted to talk about her family, but he didn't back off, instead he sat down and stared directly at her.

"My family…their nothing to brag about." She said while facing forward. It made him realize that he didn't really know too much about her besides her goals and positions regarding business. It wasn't as if he was too keen on knowing, he didn't really care, but it was one of those things you had to learn when trying to court a woman.

"Trust me mine aren't either." He told her, and she turned to face him in shock. Obviously she didn't believe that, and unlike most of the dates that he brought on the trip to impress his parents; she had actually had a good time. Not most dates enjoyed showing face for his parents. They usually got extremely nervous and didn't know what to do once his father started throwing them questions. It was different for Kagome; she got to skip that part because he had met her during meetings. She got to see only the good side, and for some odd reason she took a genuine liking to his family. It just reminded him instantly how different she was compared to all other girls. "A lot of people find my parents a bit intimidating. I'm glad you didn't."

"Oh…" she shook her head disagreeing. "No, not at all…I loved it…" He stared at her for a moment narrowing his eyes. He let a small grin play at his lips. He had no idea what to do with a girl like Kagome. He really didn't. She was not the usual type he dated, she was far too innocent.

"Oh well that's great…I'd love to meet your family." He said, and she froze completely looking away. She didn't seem like she loved that idea, but his attention was peaked at her reaction, and he really wanted to know more. "Where did you grow up?" He asked and she let her eyes drift down at the maroon color liquid in her glass.

"Uh…I don't know…" She mumbled shaking the glass and watching the wine twirl. He found the movement slightly odd, and her answer even stranger. "I uh…I grew up on a farm…in a small town," she admitted and he narrowed his eyes, he was a bit unconvinced.

"A farm…" He stated and she looked up, realizing what she had just said. She hadn't really grown up on a farm, well she technically did, but she never openly admitted it.

"Uh yeah…well no…it was a farm, but now we only have horses." She said and Sesshomaru stuck a single eyebrow up and she decided to elaborate. "Well um…see when my mom was born my house was a farm, but my dad met my mom, and he was sort of a business entrepreneur...and my grandpa he had this strange thing that he does..." She hesitated then rolled her eyes. He could see her loosening up slightly as she faced him. "You see my grandpa is really superstitious…he's really into spells and things of that nature. He used to sale some novelty items he made himself, and he likes looking up other cultures… you know beliefs and replicate them as well. Whenever some tourist past by our town he'd sale some things, and my dad was one of those tourist…he helped my grandfather start a business, and when it took off he retired the farm. Now we just have horses, we kept the horses." She said and she looked up to see his reaction. She never admitted that story. She just decided to let it out, because for the first time talking about her hometown calmed her.

He stared at her not knowing what to say. He literally had no words to continue the conversation. Kagome snuck a look up at him hoping he'd say something. When he saw her looking he gave her a fake feeble smile, then turned around in his seat grabbing a folder. She watched as he took out a few things and began reading over it. "Sort of weird right?" She asked and he just nodded. "You're probably reconsidering meeting my family." She said and he didn't answer that. He didn't want to admit out loud but he was slightly turned off.

"Uh…not really…but I do have a question" He decided since he didn't have anything to really say to contribute to the conversation, he'd just speak from a business stand point. "You said you come from a small town, does tourist come along a lot, how does your grandfather keep up a business if…"

"Oh…" she interrupted him understanding exactly where his question was going. "Yeah no…we get tourist, but they usually just past by us to get to a different town or to the city. We have an easy route when there's traffic on major intersections." She said and he nodded slightly. "He also sales things to aid farmers, we have a few farmers in my town."

"I can only imagine…" He said and he was surprised to hear her nervously laugh.

"Yeah…sometimes we'd actually ride horses into town…when I was younger and couldn't drive…" She said and he turned slightly seeing a gorgeous grin on her face. She was looking away from him. She was in her own world just thinking of memories. Memories of the actual good times she had in her town, though there seemed to be few in her opinion. Tonight after all that happened those memories actually comforted her. She sat up in her seat as something else came to her memory. "We'd ride the horses up to the mall…well we don't have a mall, we have a strip mall, and none of the stores are franchises…you won't believe this…we actually have a place to keep horses in front of the mall. It's like a stable…but no one does that anymore." She said and he paused just listening to the humor in her voice, watching her dark blue eyes glow at different points. "Not sense I was sixteen…I guess we sort of realized our town is dinky enough without farm animals running around." She laughed. He turned slightly watching as she pushed hair from her face, she was still staring out into the distance. She wasn't looking at anything in particular.

"Okay…" He said cutting her short. "Let me just get this straight…You grew up in a town that still uses farm animals to get around." He said and she blushed embarrassed.

"No…well not anymore…"

"Not sense you were sixteen?" He asked. "That was what? four years ago?" He said incredulously.

"I'm twenty three…" She said narrowing her eyes slightly. "So it was like seven years ago." She was surprised by the sadistic grin that formed at his lips. It made him extremely handsome and she had to actually look away slightly, but after awhile she began seeing the humor in it too, and despite everything she laughed.

"Wow…seven years ago…what a vast improvement." He stated…

"Well at least we're improving…" She said and he rolled his eyes and turned to face his desk again. "So…how about you, where did you grow up?" She asked and he shrugged not really wanting to elaborate on his life.

"Trust me, nowhere as fascinating as your hometown." He said and she just looked away realizing he was slightly mocking her. She would usually get extremely embarrassed by that, but this time she wasn't. There was something about her hometown and just thinking about it that sort of made her happy. She realized for the first time that she missed the old her. She missed the girl who didn't have to worry about dinner invitations or being treated differently because of how she looked. She missed going into work and being ignored by everyone. She missed being appreciated for her ideas and how qualified she was. There were definite perks from being this Kagome, perks that she'd never trade, but as she thought about them she realized that none of them were worth it. The only one that she could think of was Inuyasha, and catching his eye. That was it, the rest she'd trade in a heartbeat.

"There's something about where you grow up, where you spent the first few years of your life that you can never change." She mumbled and Sesshomaru paused at his desk not understanding what she meant. He could feel a shift in scent behind him and he turned. She had risen from his bed. She seemed very deep in thought. "Thank you…" She said suddenly, and he narrowed his eyes not understanding why he was being thanked. "For everything…for letting me in here…I needed it." She said and he watched as she walked forward setting the wine glass on his television stand and turning around to head to the door.

"Kagome…" He said and she stopped in her spot turning when he called her name. She didn't reveal anything, but she had just gotten an idea. It wasn't really an idea as much as it was a change of heart. "Your coat…" Is all that he said and she gave him a gorgeous grin before stepping forward.

"I'm always forgetting it." She said laughing nervously, and he stood up from his spot taking it from the back of the chair and walking forward. He handed it to her and she draped it over her arm.

She stared down at it for a moment, and when she looked back up her heart skipped a beat when she realized the look he was giving her. He was just staring at her with his dark golden eyes, and all of a sudden she began fumbling. "If you don't mind me asking." He said and she didn't reply telling him it was okay to continue. "What are you planning on doing?"

"Uh…" she stuttered thinking that over. "I…I guess working." She lied. "I just realized something…and I'm desperate to try it." He flashed her one of his looks. Sesshomaru always seemed to be mocking her in some way; he had several different looks to aid him in doing it, each one more handsome than the next. She backed up at that point stumbling for the door.

"Dinner reservations at nine…" He reminded her and she just smiled and nodded confirming she'd be there.

He was sitting in a chair and staring forward. He had absolutely no expression on his face. He was just staring forward and thinking. His thoughts always had to do with her. He was beating himself up mentally, because he felt awful for leaving her in the hotel hall that way. She didn't deserve that, that's what half of him said, but the other half, the angry half kept reminding him over and over about the incidents that happened earlier in the day. It didn't help that Rin had been crying nonstop for about an hour now. He had come over to comfort her, but he didn't say anything or do anything that would prove that.

Ayame was doing all the work, and now he was beginning to wonder why he came. He really didn't want to sit in his own hotel room thinking over things. He could seriously see himself forgiving her, but in the end he couldn't. Something stopped him every time, it didn't help that he was still undecided when it came to how he felt about her. It also didn't help that she admitted she loved him either. Those were words of commitment, and deciding to reciprocate her feelings was also a vow of commitment, and he didn't do well with that.

He rolled his eyes suddenly realizing how stupid everything seemed. Why the hell was he still thinking about that, did he not still feel complete anger over everything? He still very much had the wound of betrayal that she left him, he was still very much hurt. So obviously, no matter how much he didn't want it to be so, he had extremely strong feelings for Kagome, but he could earnestly say that they weren't going anywhere. He wasn't planning to do anything with them. he didn't want a relationship with her. He didn't want anything with her, he really didn't. He was angry, so sitting there and thinking about her as if nothing had happened was a waste of his time. He often found himself thinking about her, and the things that she did, the way she smiled, or carried herself, and then just like that the anger came back, because none of that. Nothing about her that he learned to actually love would ever be his, because he couldn't work past the hurt, the hurt that he wasn't ready to admit to himself was still there.

He shifted his eyes towards Rin who had finally stopped cry and was scribbling something on a piece of paper on her bed. She still had tears running down her face, so in reality she was still crying just not hysterically anymore. He searched his mind for something to say, but he found none. Instead he rose from his seat and headed to the door, he really didn't know why he was here. Being with people didn't stop his thoughts, so why did he make the effort.

He was silently going to the door when Rin looked up at him. Ayame was sitting near her and seemed completely captivated by whatever Rin was scribbling down. She dropped her pencil and sat up when she saw him go. "Where are you going?" She asked while wiping her cheeks clean. She seemed afraid suddenly and he had no idea why.

"Just going back to my hotel." He said and she sat back. He could automatically see that she wasn't very happy about that. "Rin…you have Ayame you don't need me. I haven't even done anything…"

"Yes I do…" She stated and he just stared at her. It didn't matter what the circumstances were, Rin always had to be the center of attention. She wasn't the only one that felt like shit.

"Rin you look fine…"

"Fine…" She snapped looking away from him. "If you're going to leave take that whore's bags with you too…I don't want them anymore." She said, and Inuyasha narrowed his eyes. He didn't know why he took offense to the new name Rin had assigned to Kagome, but it was just one of the weird things encoded in his emotions that he couldn't figure out.

"What bags…what are you talking about?" He asked, but she didn't say much more. She went back to drawing something out on the piece of paper. He took a few steps forward. "What bags Rin…?" He asked and she just sighed, Ayame took it upon herself to elaborate.

"When we first got on this trip Rin switched Kagome's bags." She stated and he still didn't know what she meant by that. He walked forward again waiting for a better explanation. None came so he took a seat on the edge of Ayame's bed. He could make out what Rin was drawing now. It was a dress, it was more than a dress, it was a gown. She was actually designing something. he hadn't seen her do it in awhile. Ayame seemed completely drawn to every detail, and he just sighed, he didn't want to disturb her, but on the same token he didn't want to see Kagome, so he decided he'd hang around for awhile, until the idea of giving her back bags diminished.

He was searching his mind for things to say, but he couldn't find any. He decided he'd comment on the design when he heard something vibrating. He looked over at the side table. Rin's phone was vibrating loudly, but none of them made any move to grab it. "Rin…" he said and she looked up hesitantly. "Your phone is ringing."

"It's the whore…" She said and he looked down seeing Kagome's name flash on the caller ID.

"Take it easy with the names." He stated while looking back at the phone. "Aren't you going to answer…?" His sentence ran short when he caught the look Rin was giving him. "What…?" he asked and she just rolled her eyes.

"Take it easy with the names…" She muttered before angrily shading in a part of the dresses hem. "Take it easy…wow…whose side are you on anyway?"

"Rin…"

"Don't Rin me…you come to my hotel…for god knows what. Then when I call the whore a whore, you tell me to take it easy on the names…" She said and he sighed realizing what she meant. He couldn't help it though, it just came out. Even though he was extremely upset he still had a desire to somewhat protect her. He always saw Kagome as fragile material, and she was already torn, there was no reason to shred her up completely.

"You could at least speak to her…" He said as the phone began vibrating again. Rin threw him another look.

"Speak to her…" He sighed watching as she pushed both the book she was using to write on and the paper to the side. "Should I remind you what she did? Maybe you need some reminding... then you won't be so against calling her names."

"Rin…I know what she did. And you have every right to not forgive her, but what will names do?" He asked and she just stood up from her spot and looked elsewhere.

"So that's where you want to go…right? You want to go see if she's okay…that's why you want to take off. If you feel as if she needs you more than I do, then go right ahead, you've known her longer, and in the end I'm the one who stabbed you in the back right? I pretended to be all innocent, and naïve, then I went behind your back and began shacking up with your older brother." She said and Inuyasha narrowed his eyes as anger began forming.

"Okay…" he said. "Enough…" He felt like just leaving, but his legs had stopped working, that open wound began aching suddenly, and he lost all his fight.

"I just…I don't understand why you're not mad?" She said incredulously. She would have thought he'd be the angriest. He had every right to be. What Kagome did was unforgiveable, but surprisingly he didn't seem too mad. He actually seemed a strange mixture of depressed, numb, and forgiving. The idea that Kagome could enact that sort of emotion in him made her even more furious…Inuyasha did a lot of things. He was sometimes a bit too mean, too demanding and a little bit too sarcastic, but he didn't deserve that. He didn't deserve to feel regret or depressed, it was Kagome who should have been feeling those array of emotions. Even now, when she reminded him of all she did he wasn't angry. He seemed more depressed than anything.

"Why do you need me to be mad?" He mumbled while looking away from her, it made Rin just roll her eyes. "Have you ever thought that she might be actually sorry…?" He said and Ayame looked up at that knowing Rin was going to lose it.

"Sorry…" She stated in shock "…sorry…" She widened her eyes. "Did I ever think she might be sorry…hmm…let me think…" He watched as she walked away from him and pretended to be very deep in thought. "Hell no…why should I care about how she feels…? Why do you care about how she feels…?" She demanded and he looked towards Rin's phone which began vibrating again. This time when it came to an end there was a voice mail sign showing that Kagome had left her a voice message. His heart beat spiked at that and Rin noticed his eyes on the phone. She was so angry that she couldn't even let herself fathom what Inuyasha could be feeling. It wasn't until she saw him staring towards her phone did it come to her. Inuyasha was in love with Kagome. Well she wasn't one hundred percent sure that it was love, but he cared for her in a way he didn't care for any other girl. That's what was causing him to feel regret and depressed instead of being in an angry jealous rage like she was. He couldn't bring himself to be too mad at her, not when he knew in the end he'd be losing her, it made sense.

She walked past him towards the phone. she didn't know why she was doing this. Kagome was seriously not worth her time. The regret that she should have had from losing her as a friend hadn't come yet. She was still so terribly mad, and she had every right to be, seeing her all dolled up and making her way to Sesshomaru was still fresh in her mind. She grabbed the phone and called her voice mail. she put the needed password in and placed it on speaker.

"You don't have to do that…" Inuyasha said. He didn't want to have to hear her voice again. Not yet anyway.

"No…you said she was sorry, I want to hear her side…I want to know why she did it." Rin said, and as soon as she heard herself say it, she realized that that was true. She did want to know why. she wanted so desperately to have some reason to not feel so overwhelmingly angry and depressed.

There was a long space at the beginning of the voice mail, and it was so funny how the whole room quieted down to accommodate it. It was as if they expected her to speak extremely softly, but they didn't want to miss anything. It wasn't until a few seconds did Rin begin thinking that there wasn't a voice mail, just a delay at hanging up the phone on Kagome's part. When she went to hang up that's when she heard her.

"Hi…I know I'm the last person you want to hear from…" She said and Rin looked over at Inuyasha who looked to be listening intently. "And I know I should probably leave you alone, I should let you decide rather to forgive me, because honestly I don't have an excuse." There was another pause and Rin looked down at the carpet waiting. "I called probably a million and one times, but I had nothing to say…but now I do, and it just occurred to me that you're never going to answer my call. I guess I deserve that…I messed up. I did have some time to think things over, and I got to thinking about the first time you came over my house, and you know the couple times after that when you dressed me up. I wanted to thank you, and say sorry for treating you like a pest, because you mean so much more to me…more than I thought you would, it saddens me to think we can never be friends again. I guess…I wish…I wish…" She stuttered suddenly and then paused getting her thoughts in order. "I really wish…" She paused again and her voice became cloudy and everyone knew she was about to cry. "I wish you never did that though…I wish I had stayed the same…I know it's true I let my sister and my mom and my family walk all over me and I needed help, but now I sort of wish that I could just be me…I was thinking that I wanted to go back in time. Back to before I met you, before you did any of those things, and then I realized that wouldn't be right…that you've become someone that I can't just not know…I was such an awful friend. I was…I betrayed you, and maybe now that I think about it…I do have a few excuses, but I'm not going to tell you any of them…I'm just going to say I'm sorry. You are probably the closest friend I've had since Sango…and I seriously treat her badly too…" There was a short sad laugh of realization after that, and Rin could feel herself grow upset as well. "I guess I turned into someone else, because I was never treated like this before…I couldn't cope with any of this…I really couldn't. I want to be me again, I've always try to make things right by everyone else, and you taught me to make things right by me. That's what I'm going to do…I'm going to do it my way though." She didn't say anything more and Rin let not only the tears surface but an overwhelming amount of guilt. She had no idea why she was feeling guilty when Kagome had been the one to betray her. "So I'm sorry…I'm truly sorry, and when I see you in person…I'll say it again." The voice mail ended at that and with that Rin dropped the phone on the floor and ran towards the bathroom.

"Rin…" Inuyasha said…and Ayame rose from her spot.

"Do you want me to leave?" She asked and Inuyasha looked over at her. She seemed a bit sad herself, but she was sticking it out. "I'll bring Kagome's luggage back to her…I don't mind." She said and Inuyasha sighed nodding. She turned around towards the closet getting a few things out as he walked up to the bathroom door. "Rin…" He said but she didn't answer. "Why are you crying…you shouldn't be the one that's upset?" He said.

"Yeah and neither should you…" She sobbed and he laid his back up against the wall just thinking that through. He allowed her to cry for a moment before thinking of something else to say.

"Rin…I'm not upset you are…you're the one that's crying."

"You're not fooling anyone." She said and he laughed slightly at how well Rin knew him. He let his eyes follow Ayame to the door as she left with a few sets of luggage.

"Why did you switch her luggage?" He asked but the thought had her crying a bit more. He sighed, when did he get so bad at this? He didn't have anything to say to make her feel better, he really didn't. He should have been so angry for Rin; if he couldn't be angry for himself he should have been for her. He was like her older brother, but he wasn't acting like it today. "I don't understand why you're beating yourself up…"

There was a pause in her crying and he backed up sensing her come extremely close to the door. She opened it slightly. "It's my fault…" She said and he narrowed his eyes not understanding. "Everything's my fault." She admitted. "I'm the one that changed her…I thought what's the worst that could happen. She fell for you, and you maybe would fall for her, but I didn't see this coming. I forced her like this. Didn't you hear her? She didn't know how to cope with it…I'm the reason why."

"Rin…" He said shaking his head, and she closed the door again. He easily opened it back up seeing her walk towards her bathtub. "Rin…Kagome isn't blaming you for any of this. She blames herself…honestly. And she should. It doesn't matter what you did, she had no reason after all the positive things you did for her, to go behind your back and say yes to Sesshomaru, even if she felt obligated to do it. She should have told you first." He said and Rin hesitated her crying for a moment. "You still don't have to forgive her…" He said… "You can still be mad."

"And you'll be mad too?" she asked and he smiled slightly. "Yes…I'll stay mad, just for you." She shook her head clearing tears from her face.

"No…you shouldn't be upset with her." She said and he furrowed his eyebrows extremely confused. Moments ago she was mad that he wasn't mad enough, now she didn't want him to be mad at all. "You can't stay mad at her…you have to forgive her."

"Rin…that's not going to happen." He said, and she looked up at him ready to say something else, and he shook his head. "No… Kagome and I are done…well we weren't ever anything, but whatever was going to start, or wasn't…it's done." He said and she walked forward not liking that sentiment at all and he sighed growing a bit annoyed. "You know what…" He said stopping her from speaking. "You should be my date for the dinner." He said and he knew that would make her somewhat happy, but more importantly it would stop her from playing anymore love match games. He didn't want to feel this way anymore, and he needed Rin to bud out of his life.

"You have one more chance." He said as she broke out in a somewhat smile. "One more chance to change my undeserving brother's mind, if you still want him…you can go to the dinner have him crawling back to you." He said, and although the whole thing sounded idiotic to him, it was just the thing that Rin loved. She loved sappy romantic love matches…and if she was trying to thread back together her own love life, she'd leave his alone. "What do you say…be my date?" He asked and he waited for her reaction, but it never came, instead she lounged herself at him. Hugging him ferociously… "So I'm guessing that's a yes." He said.

"Thank you…that's so…not like you." She said and he laughed a bit. She paused for a moment and then thought some things over. His proposition was actually tempting, she could see herself walking down a stairway like in Cinderella, and there was Sesshomaru, staring at her, but at that moment to his left she saw Kagome, and not only did she look gorgeous, she was even more impressive than she was. She had no idea why that image flashed into her mind, but it did. She looked up at Inuyasha extremely unhappy. "You know what…" She said before narrowing her eyes in realization. "I don't think I want your brother anymore…" She said and Inuyasha widened his eyes in shock.

"Really…" He said, and she backed up. "Well looks like you're not as dumb as I thought you were."

"Very nice…" She mumbled with a roll of her eyes. She walked back to the tub, taking a seat on its side, "but maybe I'll find myself some other rich handsome guy at the dinner…or if push comes to shove I'll marry Shippo." She said and he laughed a bit more then he thought he would at the joke. "Hey he's like thirteen now…five more years." He nodded before walking forward and sitting on the toilet.

"I think you are now… officially grosser than Miroku…congrats." He stated.

She sighed while staring at the series of buttons on her left. It was now around eleven and she was clutching leftovers in her hand. Sesshomaru was telling her something that revolved around work, and she listened intently. That was basically all they talked about, and she was completely fine with that. She didn't really like talking to Sesshomaru about her personal life. He always seemed to pass over it, and when she tried talking about him he'd always change the topic. He wasn't a really great shoulder to cry on, but he was good company. She had a lot to think about, and after leaving his room she had decided a lot of things, but she wasn't ready to go forward with them. She didn't know yet how to take the first step.

It was easy to look on the bright side when she was with Sesshomaru, because he wasn't one to comfort people, so she didn't have any room to cry. He really wouldn't allow her. That was okay too, because it was good to take a break from hating herself. The elevator doors stopped and she hesitated for a moment. She honestly didn't want to go to her room, she didn't want to be alone with the guilt, but she also didn't want to seem like the clingy type. She couldn't ask Sesshomaru again to keep her company, but when she was alone, she did some thinking, cried even more, kept calling Rin, left her a message, cleaned hysterically and cried some more. When she was with him, it was almost like things were back to how they used to be…he seemed to value her for her work.

He paused for a moment wanting her to say something, but she didn't. He kept waiting for a moment, but then after a few awkward seconds he looked down at her hotel room door, noticing something. "Are you leaving?" He asked and she narrowed her eyes in confusion turning to face the direction he was looking at. Sitting in front of her door was a few suitcases. There was a folded up piece of paper in front of them, and although she had no idea whose bags they were, and she didn't know who had left them, she was still deathly afraid to find out. She just turned back around to face him.

"Uh…no that's not mine… I don't know who they belong to." She said and he just nodded a bit. "It must be a mistake. The hotel must of just…they must of made a mistake." She stuttered while backing up and going for the folded up piece of paper. That aroused his interest and he turned to face her fully. She unfolded the piece of paper and read for a moment, he could see a small amount of realization then sadness go through her face. She looked down at the ground thinking things over then back up at him, "I'll keep it in my room, so no one steals it." She said and he stuck up an eyebrow.

"So it's not your luggage though?" He asked and she nodded while going for her key card. She was of course lying and he knew it.

"It was a mistake…can you just…?" She opened the door and began pulling the bags into her room. He walked forward watching her, but making no effort to help. Her room was of course immaculate, it had the potent smell of cleaner as well. She moved the bags to the side, and just like in her apartment, where she kept the disarray pile of mail her sister sent. She sort of let the baggage fall in an unorganized heap. She had a habit of doing that, things that tugged at her heart strings, things that emotionally had her at odds, they were the only things she let clutter her life. Everything else had to be pristinely organized. Once she was done she stood up facing him. She had changed from this morning. She had on a figure fitting dress. It was a soft yellow and ended at the knees. Her hair was simply in a bun, and she wore dark closed toe heels and stockings to combat the cold. She was gorgeous, and when he knocked on her door at around eight he was taken aback like usual.

"I know this is going to be a huge mistake on my part." He said and she looked up at him, shocked that he was standing in her doorway. "But is something wrong. Is something bothering you."

She shook her head walking forward. "No not at all…I'm fine…I just…I have a lot on my mind. I can't sleep." She said. He backed up as she quickly walked out of her apartment. He caught the double meaning in what she said. She wanted to go back into his room. Although he would usually delight in that idea, he had a feeling she didn't want to have sex with him. She just wanted to do what she had done earlier, sit there in a strange sulk, and think. He wasn't in the mood for that. He had to be up in the morning, so if she wasn't willing to have sex with him, then it seemed like it was all a waste of time.

"Kagome…" He said stopping her stumbling. She looked up at him, when he took in her face the same thought came over him. What a shame that she wasn't one to easily bed. "Do you maybe want to come in my room again?" He asked and he could see a strange relief go through her. He smiled slightly as he reached in his own pocket for his key. "I must warn you…" he said while unlocking the door and pushing it open. "If you come in, you'll be spending the night." He said and he didn't have to turn around to witness the shock on her face. He gave her a small glimpse and held in a sadistic grin. "Is that something you're interested in?" He asked and she hesitated.

She didn't know why she had to actually think about that question. It should have been an easy no. If she was going to work for Sesshomaru she didn't need to muddy the waters by sleeping with him. Isn't that what made things awful with Inuyasha in the first place? And if those reasons weren't enough she wasn't daft to the overall truth that she was madly in love with his brother. She mentally had to hit herself because she was 23, a virgin, she should have known better, you didn't have to be in love to have sex. He waited for her answer and she just gave him a small smile. A smile he wasn't expecting, he thought for a moment, was she actually going to do this. "Thanks, but no thanks…you're going to be my boss in just a few more weeks so…so I better not."

He nodded while turning forward. "Smart…" he stated. Though rather or not she would be his employee wasn't going to stop him when the time was right. She watched him leave and close the door slowly.

"Thanks for the dinner again." She called out but the door was already closed. So now she was alone, alone again with her thoughts and a suitcase filled with the old her. She turned back around into her room. She took a seat on the bed before getting back up and grabbing the note. It was from Ayame it read in short sentences… "This is your clothes. Sorry Rin stole them. Sorry about everything….Ayame…" She stared at it again and then let the paper fall to the floor. She let her eyes go to the bags and just like that the guilt came back and she was about to just cry, but an idea came to her. She rose from her spot. When she was in Sesshomaru's hotel room earlier she had gotten the idea, but as soon as she left, it just disintegrated into nothing, but it was back again, and now she knew how to execute it. She walked over to the bags and unzipped them grabbing old loose fitting clothes. Rin hadn't bothered to fold anything.

Earlier she realized that she wanted to get the old her back, well Rin had just dumped a huge part of her right at her door. Dressing like the old Kagome would not only restore some of the old her, it would discourage Sesshomaru. She paused realizing something else. She got herself in this mess for taking Sesshomaru's invitation to the dinner, when in reality she should of never taken either his or Inuyasha's invitation at all. She was the secretary and if she had never changed in the first place that's how she would have remained. She got up and walked to her desk. She pulled out a piece of paper from her binder, and grabbed a pen. She jotted down a note and quickly folded it in half. She turned around and quickly left her room going for Sesshomaru's.

She didn't want to give it to him face to face. If she did then he would only discourage her, and force her to change her mind, but if she left the note for him, then maybe he'd read it, and then see her dressed like the old her tomorrow, and he'd agree that it was the right decision. She wanted to slip it in his door, but she wasn't 100 percent sure he wouldn't notice it before tomorrow morning, so she decided she'd tape it on his door. He'd read it when he left his room or when he got back from the meeting. He'd happen upon it, just like she had the luggage and the note Ayame had left for her. She was sure this was going to work, she felt slightly better for the first time. Almost like she might be able to get past some things, in the end if she couldn't be with Inuyasha, she could still maybe get back some of the real her.

It was three in the morning when Rin kicked off her sheets and sat up. She couldn't sleep, not while so many things were going through her head, she couldn't even ignore them anymore. She shouldn't have been the one who felt so unbelievably guilty. She should have felt betrayed, angered but not guilty. But she couldn't help it. The image of Inuyasha kept replaying in her head, and she knew she couldn't sit still anymore. She sighed then quickly rose from the bed. "Ayame…" she said loudly, she was running towards her closet wanting to grab some clothes to wear. "Ayame…" She said again. It was dark, but she turned on the light in the closet. She grabbed a pair of pants and a sweater. She was beginning to pull on the pants when she hopped over to Ayame. She grabbed the pillow from under her head. It didn't wake her up so she began hitting her on her back relentlessly. That seemed to do the trick, because Ayame quickly turned over in her bed. "Ayame…"

"What…What…" She exclaimed. Rin backed up while pulling on her pants and skillfully buttoning them.

"Get up…" She said and Ayame sat up in complete confusion. "Come on…we have to go."

"Okay…okay…wait slow down." She said watching as Rin ran towards the bathroom. "What's going on?" she asked. She didn't get a response instead she heard the water running. "Rin…where are we going…it's like…" She hesitated looking at the hotel's clock on the stand. "It's three in the morning. Where do you need to be?" There was a long pause before Rin opened the door.

"I think Inuyasha's in love with Kagome…" She said and Ayame just widened her eyes.

"What he told you that…is that what he told you?" Ayame asked and Rin shook her head turning back into the bathroom.

"I just know…I've known him since forever I can just tell." She said and Ayame took a step back not quite understanding. Even if Inuyasha was in love with Kagome, which Ayame at the moment wasn't completely bought on? What did that matter? Why were they up and what was she planning on doing about it.

"Okay…that answers none of my questions." She said and Rin just sighed as she placed her toothbrush back in its holder. "What are you planning on doing?"

"I have to make sure he forgives her…" She said and Ayame narrowed her eyes. She was still so shocked and confused.

"Wait a few hours ago you only had bad things to say about her, now you're ready to forgive and forget."

"Hell no…I hate that whore, but I realized that this whole thing…" She paused trying to find something to say. "It's…it's bigger than me…it's bigger than Sesshomaru. Inuyasha seems to like Kagome. Why else did he drive all the way over here from the last town? He had something to tell her, and he's just…he's completely depressed, and Inuyasha…well he's a lot of things." Rin said as she placed her hair in a ponytail. "He's an ass he's way too self involved, but he didn't deserve what Kagome did to him…"

"Okay…okay… I agree with you. Inuyasha likes Kagome a lot, probably more than a lot of other girls he's been involved with, but…but that's not really saying a lot Rin. You say Inuyasha didn't deserve what she did, then why should you give Kagome another chance."

Rin shrugged, she wasn't sure, but after hearing that stupid message she was feeling like the guilty one. She was starting to think maybe she should have just left Kagome alone. She had thought she was helping her, but now she could see she was helping herself. Deep down she thought if she could get Kagome involved with Inuyasha then maybe she could have Sesshomaru. But it had back fired and she had no one to truly blame, but herself. She still understood that Kagome could have said no, she could have told Rin as soon as Sesshomaru had asked her out, but she hadn't and maybe Rin would never forgive her for that, but it didn't matter what her and Kagome's relationship was like. She had a duty to Inuyasha to make sure that he was happy. Because no matter what he did or how mean he could sometimes be, in the end he was like her older brother, and he was always there for her.

"I don't know…she doesn't deserve the second chance, but she's what makes Inuyasha happy, and I owe that to him." She said and Ayame sighed realizing at that moment there was nothing she could do that would change Rin's mind. She wasn't going to understand fully what went on in her mind. She sighed and turned around wanting to get dressed.

It was almost five in the morning when she had gotten herself completely dressed. She took a deep breath approaching the mirror in the bathroom for the first time. She smiled at her reflection, but of course all she could see was a blurred blob. She couldn't see anything with her reading glasses on. She just put them on in hopes that she'd be able to catch the full picture. She was always walking around with her reading glasses before her change, now she barely used them to even read unless she was alone. She quickly took them off and then looked at herself. She was dressed like the old Kagome. Her hair in a strict dark immaculate bun, her face bare of makeup, and she had on just one of her average old dresses. She paired them with one of her flats, it was a bit shapeless, something she hadn't noticed till now. The hem ended a bit higher than her ankles, which she found extremely unflattering and unattractive, but she was going to wear it. It was all in her plan.

But there was actually a deeper want than just trying to persuade Sesshomaru to lose interest in her. She was trying to find herself, she felt as if she lost something over the past couple of weeks. She was hoping that returning to how she used to be would help find it, but now at that moment, as she was staring into the mirror, she wasn't feeling what she had hoped she would. All she felt was embarrassment like she was wearing a costume that made her feel inadequate. What she thought she'd get from this was a feeling of security, to finally get back to the old her.

She sighed deeply as she looked somewhere else other than her reflection, she was kidding herself. She couldn't do this. She couldn't go back dressing like the old Kagome. She hated how she used to dress. She liked the minimal attention she got from dressing that way, but she preferred how she looked now. Did that make her shallow or conceited? She pushed a hand over her hair making sure everything was in place. She didn't bother looking at herself again; she instead left the bathroom turning off the lights.

Maybe there was a better way to go about doing this? Maybe it was time to be brave? Tell Sesshomaru she didn't want to go to the dinner with him face to face, stop trying to capture something that was long gone. She was beginning to realize that what she wanted to find was just the overwhelming feeling of comfort. Was it possible that now, in such a small amount of time, she had changed, that this was the real her now? In the end, she could seriously say she didn't care about any of this. She couldn't care less about the way she dressed, or the dinner, all she cared about was Inuyasha. She didn't even want to go to the meeting this morning, and she didn't care how she dressed to it either. So it didn't matter what she wore when she looked in the mirror, or how much she wished she could go back to the past, because in the end he was the only thing that surrounded her thoughts. She wanted the old her back, because she wanted to go back to a time when she didn't know anything about this feeling she was having. Back to the time where all she did was work, and the only thing she had to look forward to was her goal of climbing the corporate ladder. Now all she looked forward to was seeing him, and in all honesty the feeling she had towards him was something of pure joy, something she'd never wish away, but after all that happened, it had quickly and rapidly turned into just sadness.

She would do anything to take back what she had done. Anything to make things better again, and even if Inuyasha had told her he didn't have the same feelings for her, she'd still do anything to go back to the time where he didn't hate her. She could take it. She could love him all her life and never get anything from it. She truly could, because it would be ten times better than what was going on now. And when she was alone, like she was now, that's all she could think about, but she deserved to be alone. She deserved to feel this way.

She could already feel tears come to her eyes, and she quickly crawled back to her bed. She wasn't going to the meeting today. She couldn't, as much as she wanted to see him, was the equal amount of pain that came to her when she realized that he'd never forgive her. She had once thought knowing he didn't love her back would tear her apart, but this was much worse. She put her head into the pillow knowing that only a few hours ago if he admitted he didn't love her back she'd still get to see him. He would still talk to her…smile at her…do all the things he used to do, but now all that was over. Now he didn't want to have anything to do with her.

"Just be my secretary…" She whispered as she pushed her head back into the pillow. She took a deep breath knowing she was going to cry again when without warning the door to her room slammed open. She looked up and widened her eyes when she saw both Rin and Ayame standing at the doorway. She got up wiping at her cheeks.

"What the hell is this?" Rin asked while holding up a crumpled piece of paper in her hands. She was going to say more when she witnessed Kagome. "Wait…what the hell are you wearing?" She asked. Kagome was standing up staring at them. Ayame could tell she had been crying, but she didn't comment on it.

"Uh…I…you gave my clothes back." She said while stepping forward. She was going to hug her but she realized when Rin rolled her eyes and stepped further into the room, she wasn't in a very pleasant mood. "I'm going to change." She said again but Rin ignored her. "Hey…did you get my message…I left you a message. I wanted to…"

"Kagome save it…" She said interrupting her. "I'm not here to forgive you and be friends." She said and that took her off guard. Before she could say anything else she pulled up the crumpled piece of paper. "What is this…you left Sesshomaru a note."

"He was supposed to…it's private." She said wanting to get it from her, but Rin rolled her eyes and discarded it on the floor behind her. Kagome walked over to it wanting to get it.

"How private can it possibly be…you taped it on his door." She said and Kagome straightened it out. She knew she should have told Sesshomaru face to face, but she wasn't sure if she could. She didn't have the mental stability to see Inuyasha again, and here Rin was making her feel even worse. "Listen Kagome…I don't know why you wrote the note. If it's to get on my good side but…"

"No…it's not because of that." She said quickly. Rin obviously thought the reason she was telling Sesshomaru she didn't want to go to the dinner was because she was trying to get on good terms with her. "I just…I don't want to go to the dinner anymore, not with anyone." She admitted and Ayame looked to Rin to see her reaction.

"Well…" She said as Kagome rose up slowly. "You're going to that dinner, and you're going with Sesshomaru." She stated. Kagome seemed shocked by that.

"What…"

"Listen…I'm still so mad at you. But…I have a reason for all this." She said and Kagome shook her head.

"Rin…I seriously…I don't want to go to the dinner, and I defiantly don't want to go with Sesshomaru?" She said, but it didn't make Rin any happier, not that that was her intention. She still seemed aggressively mad, and she had a feeling that there was nothing she could do that would make her happier. Even if she told Rin that she had no romantic interest in Sesshomaru, she'd still be upset, besides she had a feeling she already knew that. "Well then…why are you here?" She asked bluntly.

She knew she owed Rin everything, but she really didn't need her to stand there kicking her while she was down. Rin just stared for a moment before grabbing the spare key card from her satchel. She tossed the little card on the bed then looked over at Kagome. "I gave you back your clothes…I'm sorry I took them, and if I knew you were going to wear them again. I would have never given them back." She said honestly. Kagome sighed staring past her.

"Is that why you're here…to tell me that?" She asked and Rin shook her head. She looked to Ayame for a moment. Almost as if they were having a short conversation she wasn't invited in on. The conversation lasted only seconds, because out of nowhere Rin turned around to face her again.

"When I came over…well that time you said in the message….you meant that? You're not happy that I…I didn't help you." Rin stuttered and Kagome stared at her. Knowing exactly what she meant. She was asking if it was true. If she really wished Rin had never given her the makeover. Of course after today, she knew that wasn't true, she was grateful to Rin…she didn't want to go back to how she was, but in the same note, she wanted to go back to a time when she didn't have to worry about this. When falling in love with her boss was the last thing on her mind.

"No…no I didn't mean it." She said. "You helped me…I was just…" She stuttered while going back to her bed and sitting heavily. "I mean look at me…I must have been crazy…" She mumbled and Rin smiled slightly at that. "But you're still mad at me?"

Rin sighed loudly. "Well…well yeah Kagome…you sort of screwed me over…made me seem like an idiot. Here I am trying to get Sesshomaru to ask me to the annual dinner, and he already has a date…a date with you…you were suppose to be my friend…I didn't help you so you could stab me in my back."

"I know…I know… and I seriously, you have to believe me. I feel so awful…" She said and Rin walked over to the small desk in the corner. She sat down on it waiting for Kagome to finish. "He said it was all business, and I was so naïve…I made a mistake. I thought…I guess I was flattered, but after all that stuff happened with Inuyasha…"

"I know…" Rin said… "You don't have to explain anymore to me. I completely understand, but that doesn't mean I can forgive you. I don't think I can, but I sincerely want you to be with Inuyasha. At first I might have wanted it for all the wrong reasons, but now…"

"Yeah, but he doesn't even want to look at me. And for good reason, I think that ship has sailed. That's why I'm dressed like this…" Her voice began to crack with obvious emotion. "And that's fine, that's why I left the message…that's why I want to go back to how I was…because he's gone, and he's never going to forgive me, and he probably doesn't feel the same about me…and that's why I took the job with Sesshomaru, because of that…because I embarrassed myself, embarrassed him, and stabbed him in the back…"

"Yeah…yeah…that's all true…it is." Rin said stopping her rambling. "I don't know what's going on in Inuyasha's head, I really don't, but I've known him forever. He cares about you."

"Yeah, but not in the way I care for him…"

"That's not true Kagome…" Ayame said this time. Kagome looked up at her. "I actually believe Rin…he likes you…"

"If he didn't… then he wouldn't have been so mad when he saw you with Sesshomaru, he wouldn't even have been there to witness it. He drove all through the night for you."

"Oh yeah…" Kagome whispered. Her eyes were glossing over with tears. "Well…guys…thanks. I know you're super mad at me, and you don't have to do this, but…I can't. I'm done grasping for invisible straws." She said and she looked down before the tears could fall. "I'm trying to make things right, then make peace with everything." She got up looking up at the clock. It was almost time for her to go, but she didn't want to. She wanted to go back to bed.

"Well I'm sorry Kagome…" Rin said. "But you don't have that choice." She said and Kagome looked up. "You may not think Inuyasha likes you, and maybe he doesn't. Maybe he's angrier at you than I am, but I owe it to him to make things right, and if you love him, then you must be willing to try. I can help you. I'll help you, because I want to help him, but you have to know you're the reason why he's this upset…so no…you don't have a choice…you have to make things right." She paused for a moment before going towards her drawers. She opened them up looking for some of the new clothes she had bought her. "So take off those clothes…" She said while pulling out a tube skirt, and a silk scarlet red blouse. "You'll wear this today…and you won't tell Sesshomaru anything, you'll act completely normal." She said.

Kagome looked down at the skirt. She thought it was a bit too short; it looked like it was about mid thigh…she didn't think it was smart to argue with her. "I have a question…if you want to help me and Inuyasha, then why do you want me to stay with Sesshomaru?"

"Because…" She said... "I have a plan…and it evolves you going to the dinner, and if you don't go with Sesshomaru, you won't go at all." Kagome thought that over for a moment, she then wanted to ask another question but Rin looked at the time. "Come on Kagome you're going to be late…Ayame can you run down to the limo….Inuyasha's probably waiting for her. Tell him we're going to take her." Kagome turned at that…she was really about to interrupt but Rin pushed her towards the bathroom. "We took Kouga's car…everything will be fine…"

He didn't know how he felt about Rin forgiving Kagome. He understood in the end it was none of his business. If Rin and Kagome were on talking terms more power to them, but he was nowhere near forgiving Kagome. He didn't even see the situation as something that was worth forgiving. He just wanted to end any personal relationship with her all together. He knew now that Rin and Kagome talking would force him to see her more, maybe he'd start thinking about actually speaking to her, but he didn't see that happening. He drummed his fingers against the table; he was conflicted with the idea of it. He was of course extremely upset about what had happened between them, but he couldn't stop the overwhelming feeling of relief that came afterwards.

He had been so hurt yesterday, and he didn't understand why completely. It took awhile for him to realize the reason. Of course he was mad that Kagome had accepted a dinner invitation from him when she had already been asked by his brother. But he knew normally, if it was any other person he wouldn't care, but it was her, and it hurt so much because he felt something for her, something deep.

She had said she loved him…that sat heavy in his head. He couldn't even begin to dissect how he felt for her, but he now understood why he felt relief. He knew deep down it was because he didn't have to deal with it. The longer he was angry the longer he didn't have to admit his feelings for her. The initial frustration he felt, he still had it now. He hadn't talked to his brother when he entered the building, and he wasn't planning on doing it now. He was just on time today, and Sesshomaru was talking over something with their father.

He was in his own little world just thinking. That's all he did now, think about her. She stayed on his mind constantly. He didn't notice Sesshomaru coming back to his seat, and his father sitting down. They still had about twenty minutes before the meeting actually start. His father had tried getting his attention several times, but he didn't budge. He just looked up and once he was done speaking he looked down again, lost in his own world. He was beginning to think that maybe he was making a huge mistake by not forgiving her. of course it would be too soon for him to do it now. He was still so overwhelmingly angry, but later. He didn't want to wake up weeks, months, or years from now and regret skipping out on the only woman that made him feel this way? He thought about that for a moment, so lost in his own world, he didn't notice the door opening on his right.

As soon as she entered all eyes went to her, all eyes but of course his. She was extremely relieved to see only the Takashi's in the room; that meant she was still early. She pulled down her skirt quickly before walking forward. She smiled over at Inutashio… "Sorry I'm late…one of those days." She said and he gave her a reassuring grin, but he just continued staring at her. It was like she had a horn on her head. She ignored it and looked over at Sesshomaru, wanting to say hello, but he was staring at her as well. She looked down, checking if something was wrong with her clothes. She seemed like she was all in order, but she didn't look at herself before leaving the hotel. She was in a hurry.

She walked past him deciding to put her things down, as soon as she walked over to his side, her heart began beating, and that unbelievably sad feeling sunk in again. She would usually sit next to him, but she knew he wouldn't want that, so she left a space between Sesshomaru, and two seats between him. He had looked up at that point, and when he saw her all his thoughts disappeared.

The first thought that came to his head was how gorgeous she was, but that was the usual for her. She had on his favorite color, but that's not what caught his eye. What really had him staring was the fit of her clothes. Her skirt seemed to hold on to her hips before stopping only mid thigh, and though it was cold outside, she had no stockings to combat the weather. Instead she had on knee length black boots. Her blouse was unbuttoned right before her actual breast, and tucked at the waist. She had her hair down completely. It was just loosely falling down her back in big bold waves. She didn't seem to notice, which was the usual for her. Her clothes usually faked modesty, but not today, instead they mocked business attire.

She didn't know rather she should say hi to him or just sit down and ignore him. She decided to just wave his way. When she turned to face him her stomach went completely warm as her blood got extremely cold. He was staring at her, she put a hand up, and just like that he looked away, for some reason that hurt her a lot. She tried not to show it, but when she noticed Sesshomaru and Inutashio still looking she stood straight and quickly left towards the door. They all watched as she left, and when she was gone Inutashio sat up.

"So uh…" he said and Sesshomaru turned to face him. "One of you…which one of you is taking her to the dinner?" He asked while distracting himself by straightening out stacks of paper. He seemed at odds by something, obviously he noticed Kagome's appearance, and he was just slightly taken aback by it.

Before Sesshomaru could say anything Inuyasha interrupted. He asked something concerning the clients coming in. His dad turned to face him, obviously pleased Inuyasha was finally taking some interest.

She stared at herself in the mirror, sighing as she buttoned up her shirt to the very top. She realized how ridiculous that looked before unbuttoning one button and then stepping back. She pulled up her hair putting it in a bun. Of course everyone was staring at her, she looked like a slut. She should have looked in a mirror before going in. She pushed her skirt down slightly then turned around leaving the bathroom. As soon as she opened the double doors the room got quiet again. Inuyasha intentionally looked the other way, facing his papers. She was supposed to be nothing more than a secretary to him, but he couldn't even bring himself to speak to her. She went back to her spot, and when she did Sesshomaru leaned towards her.

"You look remarkable today." He said, and she turned to face him.

"Thank you…" She said while thinking of what else to say. "You look amazing too." She said, but she hadn't even looked at him. He stuck an eyebrow up, realizing something was bothering her. He was going to ask her directly when he realized her eyes going towards his brother. He groaned suddenly. What the hell was it going to take for her to get over him?

Inuyasha hadn't even acknowledged her existence, but last night he let her sit in his room when she was feeling under. He rolled his eyes as he thought about those stupid stories she told about her backwards town. As if that wasn't enough he took her to fucking dinner. He wasn't even expecting sex, though he had really wanted it, but she was still obsessed with his stupid brother, as if she hadn't cried enough over him. He just didn't get it. He thought maybe after the trip was over, when she was in his district working for him. She'd get over him.

"Thanks…" He said and she nodded still staring at Inuyasha. "So I take it you're feeling better this morning?" He said and she threw him a quick look. Her hair was out of her face, and with just one good look at her, he knew he was making a good choice by pursuing her. She was perfect.

"Yeah…much better, thanks again." She said, before rising from her seat and walking closer to Inuyasha. He had just stopped talking to his father about business, so maybe that was her entrance to do the same. She couldn't believe the extreme need she had to speak to him. Sesshomaru watched in utter annoyance as she pulled up a seat near him. She went out of her way to rotate the chair to face him completely.

"Hi…" She said and he gave her a quick glimpse before looking down at his papers. He really didn't like this. he really didn't want her this close. His head was filled with thoughts about her, but now his senses were too. "Uh I'm sorry I'm late…"

"I don't care…" He stated bluntly, and just like that she felt like he jabbed a knife through her heart.

"Yeah…of course…I know…." She said looking away. She stared at the table searching for things to say. "I just wanted to know if there was something you wanted me to do."

"Do what you usually do." He said. he was still looking away from her. He wanted her to leave, and he wanted to tell her to do so, but he realized how ridiculous the whole thing was. He was mad but he needed to hide that, she was still an employee. Well she was until the end of the trip. That made him even angrier…did she have feelings for his brother? He remembered her telling him why she had asked to switch branches, but still he was already angry enough about the dinner thing, then she had to do that as well. He took a deep breath trying to hide his frustrations. "Actually, can you write notes, type them out and send them to me." He asked her, and she nodded. "Then maybe if there's any other documents that need retouching or going over you can do that. I want the notes by tomorrow and the documents tonight." He said and she just nodded again.

"Of course…" She said and he turned to face her. She was looking away from him. She seemed a bit lost. It reminded him of last night. How sad she was, he knew she would cry when he left, and he couldn't believe how much that affected him. He didn't want her crying…he really didn't. He didn't even want her sad or upset.

"Or I don't know…" He said after awhile… "You don't have to actually type up the notes…" He said and she looked up. He took in her gorgeous face. He couldn't believe this girl loved him. He really couldn't, she was all he ever wanted in a woman, it was a strange thought, but it was the first one that came to him.

"Thanks…" she said silently and he looked away from her.

"It's not for your benefit…" He told her and she nodded again realizing that. "It's to save paper…" he said, though it was actually for her. Everything he did was for her these days.

"Well thanks on behalf of the paper…" She joked and he narrowed his eyes slightly not finding it funny at all.

"Kagome…" he stated and she turned her unusual blue eyes on him again. He was going to say something extremely rude. Something along the lines of demanding her to go back to her seat, but when he saw her, the thought disappeared. He just stared at her, and she never dropped his stare. He could feel his heart pick up and the overwhelming need to bend over and kiss her. He was having it a lot lately, and he knew if he acted on it, he wouldn't regret it. When he kissed her for the first time his thoughts disappeared, something went wild in him. That never happened with anyone else. He kept holding her stare for a moment longer till the doors opened; he switched his glimpse to the door. A few men walked in and everyone rose from their seats. She was a bit delayed and extremely upset that someone interrupted whatever it was they were doing.

She turned to face them, she shook their hands when they approached, and as they spoke to Inutashio she turned to face Inuyasha again. With whatever just happened she was hoping she could rekindle it. She had hope again, maybe Rin was right, but when she faced him he was quickly gathering his things. "What…where are you going…?" She asked and he didn't spare her a look.

"Take notes…" He stated before rising from his seat and heading to the door. His dad turned to face him as he left. When he was gone he turned to glimpse at Kagome. She seemed as surprised as everyone else, and all of a sudden overwhelmingly sad again. She pushed herself deeper in her seat letting everything soak in. All her hopes dashed, even if he did care for her…he still hated her, and she deserved it.

A/N: Thanks for all the reviews for the last chapter. I tried posting this one quick, but I couldn't end it on a good place. Please review and tell me your views!