Chapter Seven: "You Can Always Coun-tine on Me" Burger (Comes with a Side of Poutine):
If Tina was her voice of reason, Gene was Louise's partner in crime. Louise propositioned a master plot, Gene was there for the whole ride. Sometimes it was because he wasn't listening and didn't know what he had agreed to, but usually it was in the spirit of sibling bonding.
Gene was the fabulous, large brother that Louise didn't always deserve. The less Tina was around, the more Louise pushed Gene into being her sidekick. Trying to siphon all the time she could out of him before he graduated, moved on with his life, and left her all alone with their parents. Just like Tina had.
At first it was great, their life as the troublesome two. But all the extra time spent together helped them to realize they were still two very different people.
"I blame Dad!" Gene declared one morning at breakfast. Bob was making waffles or pancakes or whatever Gene said he wanted. Gene was making up things that weren't his mind.
"You kids hardly get anything from me, I swear," Linda said as she put on a pot of coffee. "Except my singing, talent, and good looks. And they say persuasion is always the mother's fault. Something with genetics." Linda waved her hand dismissively.
"I blame all the Belcher genes," Louise threw sardonically, pen poised over the homework she'd put off all weekend and rushed through in the morning right before school. The last few weeks of Louise's sophomore year were coming to a close. She began to find it more and more difficult to care about silly things like homework.
"Excuse you, I am the only Belcher, Gene," the middle child quipped. Linda laughed. Louise rolled her eyes. Her annoyance with Gene had been building over the last few days and she'd been finding it harder to hold her tongue.
The topic of sexuality in the Belcher household didn't come up often. No one felt the need to comment on something that would be accepted without question. Gene was fabulous and free. He had dated Courtney. Then he dated Alex. Gene deserved someone who could appreciate him for who he was. Someone who would get his sense of humor.
Gene never had to stifle himself around Alex.
The siblings knew their father wasn't completely straight either, not that it would have mattered. As Belcher siblings were growing up, Linda's tendency to have a little too much wine and gossip about her very personal life with Ginger became more frequent. Linda wasn't as quiet as she thought she was, especially while on the telephone.
Louise had always known who she was. Louise Belcher was always true to herself right up until it came to being honest about her emotions. If it was Louise admitting she was confused about something, few human ears would ever hear it.
She'd never thought much about relationships, dating, or sex while growing up. She was sixteen and it all sounded like a giant chore. Sure, she'd had a massive crush on Boo Boo from Boyz 4 Now. A crush that wouldn't ever seem to go away, but it was a crush that wouldn't lead to anything. A safe crush. The only kind of crush Louise tolderated.
There was one time she'd considered Regular-Sized Rudy for five seconds, when they were in elementary school. There was also that weird thing with Abby Haddington in a closet one time at a party. It ended when she tried to take off Louise's Ears and braid her hair. Slightly drunk Louise had wanted Abby to shut up and just make out with her instead of trying to braid her hair. Louise and Abby hadn't talked much after that.
There was also the obsessive and perpetual attention of Millie Frock. A kind of attention that left Louise genuinely afraid at times.
None of this made it easier for Louise to sort out her feelings.
"We get it. You're here, you're queer, and you don't know how to shut the fuck up!"
The kitchen went silent. Bob's eyebrows furrowed and he looked like he was trying to hold back words he knew he'd regret. Linda's mouth was agape, in a rare speechless moment.
Gene had never looked so crestfallen in his family's presence.
Louise got up, threw her back pack over her shoulder and walked away from the table. She kept walking until she reached the halls of Huxley High. Very early and with a sense of numbness building higher and higher every step.
Had she just said that to her family? The only people in her personal epicenter she truly never wanted to hurt.
Louise knew she was part of the family's bisexual common denominator, but she didn't realize she would have such a hard time accepting it. Maybe it was just accepting the fact she was capable of being attracted to anyone at all.
Louise didn't trust love. She'd seen all the dumb mistakes Tina had made up until Zeke. She'd seen all the dumb mistakes Tina had made with Zeke. Her mother had been engaged to Hugo, the disgruntled heath inspector, for fuck's sake.
If that's what people thought love was, she'd sit this one out.
She's recalled the time in elementary school where she'd thought Regular-Sized Rudy was interested in her and how she'd purposefully made herself weird and disgusting to be unattractive to him. She'd used the same strategy well into her teenage years to avoid having to formally reject anyone. It was a power and responsibility Louise wasn't ready for. She wasn't sure she even wanted it.
Did her parents suspect the same inclinations about their daughter as readily as they had with Gene? Bob could be utterly unobservant. Linda was no detective either, but she was much more in tune with emotional nuances than her husband.
Louise saw her brother in the halls. Gene didn't walk with her or wave to her. Louise didn't hunt for Gene in the band room where she sometimes spent the first half of her lunch. Louise spent her lunch in the cafeteria tuning out the constant chatter of Harley and the Pesto Twins instead.
At the last bell, Louise threw her worn backpack over her shoulder and marched her way down the hall to after-school detention. She'd accrued a week's worth of detention when she'd been a thread away from beating the shit out of the O'Brien brothers for picking on Ollie and Andy. Louise felt more than justified after the incident and the Pesto Twins had both tried to kiss her hands and carry her books around the day after. Louise had been more than obliged to take them up on lugging around her belongings.
This year in particular, she'd made an extracurricular out of detention, with an occasional foray into in-school suspension. She was considering putting it on her college applications, even. She'd never batted an eye at it, until Millie Frock caught on.
Millie would do something stupid to get herself in trouble, too, if she'd caught word that Louise was in detention. Millie would park herself next to whatever desk Louise was sitting at and try to pass notes to her. If Louise came in late to avoid Millie or she switched desks, Millie would follow. Louise's best defense came to be ignoring Millie. Today, though, Louise was not tolerant of anyone. Especially not Millie Frock.
Millie had become steadily more aggressive into their later years at Wagstaff. By the time they had reached Huxley High, Millie was a walking nightmare. She bribed and threatened faculty to get the same class periods as Louise. She would slip lipstick covered notes into Louise's backpack labeling them from a "secret admirer." Louise would avoid her own locker throughout the day because Millie would be there waiting for her so they could "walk to class together."
Millie Frock as a sad, crazy girl with a crush. Louise Belcher was just a mean bully who couldn't let Millie down easily. That's how everyone saw it, anyway. Louise stopped fighting it. No one believed her. So she let them think she was the bully. The jerk. It was easier that way. She was sick of being called a liar.
Millie sat directly behind Louise that afternoon, folding notes into and sticking them in the hood of Louise's green sweater. Louise thought she might have seen Millie slip something into her backpack, but she couldn't be sure. Millie was almost as skillful as Louise at trickery and sleights-of-hand.
Louise tried as hard as she could to hold herself together. Mostly she was thinking about what she'd said to Gene. She had begun to think about what her parents thought and how she might have hurt them, too. Then she started thinking about herself and her boastful claims that she was always true to herself. Had she been true to herself lately?
And typical Millie was here harassing her instead of leaving her alone so she could suss out her thoughts. Louise felt her shoulders hunch up around her neck. She pulled her hood over her head and was told to pull it back down again almost as quickly. She'd forgotten about all the papers that had been stuffed in her hood and they poked the back of her neck as soon as she pulled the hood up. When her hood came back down, the notes bounced out and scattered around her desk and onto the floor.
Louise wished she had her Ears on. She'd rushed out of the apartment that morning and didn't have the chance to grab them and tuck them into their rightful spot in her back pocket.
Louise dismissed herself to the bathroom, but picked up her backpack. Mr. Frond, who'd transferred to "guide" at the high school at the beginning of the year, gave her a strange look. Louise went up to the desk and whispered something about Millie rooting through her things. She was excused, but not removed from suspicion.
Louise walked out of the classroom, past the gym, and straight out of the school. Her pace quickened.
"Wait! Slow down! Louise!" a familiar voice called behind her. Louise stopped and looked back to see Alex and his wide frame approaching her. He was dressed in athletic sweats, just coming out of drill practice.
"What's up?" she mumbled, looking down at her scuffed boots.
"Gene's kind of pissed at you."
"I know."
"Actually, I think he's extra bummed out. You really, really messed up."
"I know," Louise looked Alex square in the eye.
"Your brother is the best thing that ever happened to me, aside from bottomless brunch hash browns. I know how close you two are and you need to apologize to him."
"I know."
"Are you going to say anything else except 'I know?' "
Louise said nothing this time. She spun around on her heels and left Alex standing there, not able to release the full effect of his lecture on her. Louise continued her walk home. What right did Alex have to talk down to her like that? What business did he have being so damn right about everything?
Louise snuck through the alley behind Bob's Burgers and around the side, letting herself through the door to the apartment so her family couldn't see her coming home through the large window of the restaurant.
Zeke had been scheduled to work the days that would normally belong to Louise. At least someone had been benefiting from her constant days of detention.
Louise moved as quietly as she could up the stairs and shut herself in her room. She could hear water running in the kitchen as Linda did dishes.
Louise dug through her backpack and reached for her homework. She felt something smooth and light in her backpack and pulled out the unfamiliar thing. She held up a pink scrapbook with hearts and glitter all over. Louise opened it up and flipped through the pages. Pictures of her and Millie were plastered all over the scrapbook. Some were photoshopped, some were taken sneakily. Millie had plastered the book with pictures of pets, houses, and destination wedding ideas. Love notes had been scrawled on the pages, reading: "I know how you really feel" and "It's you and me against the world" and "You can't deny what's in your heart."
Louise threw the offending book as hard as she could against her bedroom door. It made a satisfying smack, then thudded to the floor.
"Hey! I heard that Miss Missy! You're acting like a royal jerk today. I don't know what's gotten into you, but you're gonna fix it!" Linda yelled at Louise through her door for a while before making vague mentions of "grounded" and "school called" and "in-school suspension for skipping detention."
Louise wanted to run to her mother and grovel for forgiveness. To explain herself. But that was too pathetic. It wasn't in tough Louise Belcher's nature. No matter how overwhelmed she was, she would absolutely not grovel to her mother or admit that anything could possibly be wrong.
Louise spotted Millie's scrapbook on the floor again. It was like everything that was angering and confusing in Louise's life had been captured in Millie's unsolicited, grotesque gift. It was like Millie knew what was tormenting Louise and she had found a way to physically manifest it.
She smashed her face into her pillow and cried. She cried for a long time and couldn't remember falling asleep. She didn't come out of her room until the next morning.
The next day at school, Louise met up with her friends before relegating herself to in-school suspension.
"You look like Hell," Regular-Sized Rudy told her.
"Thanks, that's what every girl wants to hear, Rudes."
"Yeah, bad," Andy chimed in.
"Really bad," Ollie echoed.
Jessica and Harley fluttered around Louise, but she shooed them away. When Louise saw Alex and Gene approaching the steps of the school together, she slunk into the building and made her way to in-school suspension early, like a loser. She sat in the back and pulled her hood over her head, covering the light from the windows in a dark film. She closed her eyes and leaned back in the chair.
A few minutes of peace passed before Louise sensed a presence.
"Did you get my gift?"
Louise jumped in her seat and pulled her hood down. The blonde she-devil was sitting in the desk directly in front of her, chin resting on her elbow, elbow resting on the surface of Louise's desk. She was leering at Louise. She was the only other person in the room.
"Go die in a ditch, Millie."
"That's not nice. But you look really tired Louie Lou, so I'll forgive you."
"My name is Louise," she said, drawing her hood back over her eyes.
"Why won't you look at me?!" Millie's tone was harsh as she pulled the hood back down from Louise's face. "Stop playing hard to get!" Millie yanked on Louise's long black hair and pulled Louise's face toward hers.
Louise had her hand ready and poised to slap Millie clean on the cheek, but Millie's speed out matched Louise's. Millie's lips met hers. Before Louise had the chance to slap Millie, a chance shove her away, even, Mr. Frond came into the room.
He'd shouted for the two girls to separate and go to the principal's office.
Louise tried to explain, tried to defend herself, but she was getting too choked up. She knew how it looked and Mr. Frond didn't want to hear it. He'd had known what he'd seen.
Millie skipped to the principal's office with vigor. She'd just kissed Louise Belcher! Any punishment was worth that victory.
Louise walked to the principal's office as slowly as she could, putting as much distance between herself and Millie as she thought she could get away with. Her eyes cast down to the floor. She's just been manhandled by Millie Frock. She felt nauseous. She wasn't really here. That hadn't really just happened.
Louise sat in the seat closest to the door. With secretarial supervision, Millie was blissfully forced to sit apart from her. Louise still felt like the space of the office was too small to be shared with Millie. Millie kept looking over at her. Louise kept her eyes on the floor.
Is this what suffocation felt like? Everytime Louise tried to breathe, she felt like she was sucking in water. There wasn't enough air to breathe, not enough to calm her racing heart.
Linda appeared in the door frame of the office, with a look of deep concern. The Vice Principal had called Linda Belcher to inform her that her daughter had been caught engaging in "inappropriate physical activity" and was being "suspended outside of school" for the remainder of the week. Linda was to pick her daughter up at her earliest convenience.
Louise grabbed her backpack and followed her mother to the car. Louise stared at her scuffed up boots. She didn't look at Linda or attempt to say a single word. She picked at the distressed threads of her jeans the whole ride home. Linda parked the car and ushered her daughter past the window of the restaurant. Louise saw Zeke inside, casually conversing with Teddy from his place behind the counter.
The mother and daughter walked into the apartment and Louise followed Linda into the living room. Bob was already on the couch when Linda sat down next to him. The glittery, pink scrapbook lay on the coffee table. The sight of the scrapbook made Louise want to take the whole coffee table and flip it over.
"You're not in trouble," Bob began.
Louise would have kicked and screamed at her parents under any other circumstances, knowing they had gone into her room and through her things. But these were not normal circumstances. Strong Louise was one straw away from her tough girl facade crumbling.
"I got a call from the Vice Principal," Linda started. "They said you were engaging in 'inappropriate physical activity.' I thought you got into a fight. But when they said you were kissing another student in the classroom, I thought something smelled fishy."
Louise stood in the center of the living room, still looking down at her shoes. Bob and Linda had never seen their youngest daughter look so defeated. It frightened them.
"Talk when you're ready," Linda patiently urged.
It took some time and when Louise thought she was going to speak, she choked. She swallowed the feeling of dread creeping in and looked up at her parents. When she finally did speak, she told them everything. Her confusion and anger. How sorry she was for what she'd said to her brother. Where the scrapbook came from.
Louise told her parents about the deliberate times Millie had gotten herself in trouble to be in the same room as Louise. The unwanted stalking in and out of the school hallways. Millie cornering her in the school bathrooms. The notes and love letters. Then Louise told her parents about the unwanted kiss, the tipping point that led them to this moment.
Bob got up from the couch and untied his apron. He grabbed the keys off the coffee table. Louise was wide eyed. Her father was enraged and her mother didn't look far off from it either. Her parents believed her?
Of course they did. Why wouldn't they? Why was it so unbelievable that someone finally believed her? Didn't think she was the one bullying some poor girl that had a crush on her? That she wasn't the one that was hurting Millie and that it was very much the other way around?
Linda got up and hugged her daughter, then she followed Bob down the stairs.
Louise crawled into bed fully clothed and tried to fall asleep while her parents went down to the school and raised Hell, fighting against their daughter's unfair and unwarranted suspension.
Louise awoke hours later to a knock on her door. She rolled out of her bed and opened the door. Gene walked into his sister's room and scooped her up into a large brother hug.
"I'm sorry," Louise said.
"Me too," Gene said.
"I'm more sorry."
"I heard what happened. I heard at school, but Mom and Dad told me everything."
"I'm sure the rumors are flying. Fricking liars."
"Millie got suspended for the rest of the school year."
"Oh, all week and a half of it? Must be so hard for her."
"You're not suspended, though."
"It's really the little things," Louise's words dripped with acid. "They should have expelled her."
Gene paused for a moment,"You remember when we turned the walk-in into an underground ice fight club?"
"Yeah?"
"Remember when you beat me because you tricked me."
"Where are you going with this?"
"You beat me, but I still put that fart jar in Zeke's face so he would lose."
Louise chuckled, "Yeah."
"The point is: I'm always on your side, even when you're a jackass."
"Thanks, Large Brother."
"I'm so telling that fart story at Zeke's wedding," Gene added.
Gene and Louise laughed together and they laughed loudly. They were the Troublesome Two. Belchers from womb to tomb.
Tina had come home from Trenton for her final Spring Break. While the rest of her college class were getting stoned by some beach somewhere, Tina couldn't imagine being anywhere else but Seymour's Bay.
But even the lights and sights of Wonder Wharf slipping past the window of her parent's car did little to cure her sour mood.
Tina had sat in silence for most of the hour and a half drive home, Bob attempting to make small talk only in the first quarter of the drive. He'd debated with himself on asking his eldest what was troubling her. He decided against it, having had more than one poor experience with volatile Tina and her adult temper tantrums distracting him from the road.
Bob had been on his feet all day. He was tired. He didn't know if he wanted to deal with problems that felt trivial to him, but world ending to Tina.
Bob had begun to fear that this was Tina's new normal.
Bob sometimes wondered if he was a good father.
Tina sometimes didn't care if she was a good daughter.
Tina didn't want to talk about her awful roommate who kicked her out of the room so she could have boys over. Tina didn't want to talk about the class she was close to failing because instructions felt like they could sometimes be harder for her to understand than for other people. Tina definitely didn't want to talk about how little her and Zeke had been talking, but how much they had been fighting when they did talk. Long distance was hard. An hour and a half of physical distance could feel like light years of distance when you were both planning separately for your futures.
Bob went right back to work after bringing his daughter home. It was late afternoon and the dinner rush was dawning. Zeke had taken off before the father and daughter arrived. When Tina found out, she hated Zeke for a moment and stormed upstairs to the apartment. Linda could have been more upset at her daughter for not coming to see her when she got home, but Linda was a young woman once, too. She understood.
Louise was sitting at the kitchen table, working on an essay, because she wasn't the kind of senior that Spring Break applied to. She heard stomping, then Tina entered the kitchen looking pissy as she grabbed a wine glass out of the cupboard. Tina had slammed the cupboard door shut.
"I'm the only one allowed to slam things in this house," Louise said, looking up at her sister.
"Nobody asked you."
"Tina-Zilla," Louise coughed under her breath. She'd picked her pen up and resumed writing. The less than endearing moniker had been coined by Louise when Tina came home for a weekend a month into the first semester that year. She'd spent the whole weekend fuming and being very un-Tina-like. Louise knew Tina would hate the nickname and her theory was proven true. Tina had been home four times that school year and each time she brought home a larger attitude with her. She never talked about school or her personal life, not even with all of Linda's prying.
Tina ignored her sister and commandeered the living room, turning the television on and the volume up. "I'm doing homework, T. Can you turn it down?" Louise shouted from the kitchen. The volume increased. "T, seriously, I know you miss Gene, but you don't need to act like him." The volume increased again. "Turn the frickin' TV off!"
No response.
Louise marched into the living room and pulled the TV plug out of the socket. The screen went black. Tina sat up on the couch and gave her sister a death stare. Louise didn't know Tina was capable of that. She stared back at the sister who had grown so unfamiliar to her.
"You always hate when I come home. It cuts into all the attention you get from Mom and Dad," Tina accused.
"What attention? They're too busy with the restaurant to even spend time with me anymore."
"Just because you're Dad's favorite, doesn't mean you get to act like you own the place!"
"I'm the favorite? Says the spoiled brat who gets to go to a real college!"
"You get to spend all your time with Mom and Dad! What do I get?"
"Literally everything!"
"You've always had Dad and Gene's always had Mom. What about me? I don't get anyone!"
"You get everything you fucking ask for! Your stupid birthday parties. Your stupid horse camp. Your stupid college paid for. Dad has a stupid tramp stamp of his own mustache because of you!"
"Yeah, well you pushed him into going to that stupid Equestria-Con cause you wanted to feel like a spy or whatever. Just like you push everyone into everything you wanna do because you're selfish!" Tina shouted
"I did that stupid Equestria-Con thing for you! I do a lot of things for you! I went to the top of Mount Windy Gap for you, you miserable bitch!" Louise forced her voice to go louder than Tina's.
Both sisters were on the verge of strained voices. They stared at each other for a moment, tension and a film of melancholy settling over them. They couldn't find the words to keep fighting or to apologize to one another.
Tina got up with her bottle of wine and slammed the door to her room, leaving her glass on the coffee table and her sister stunned in the living room.
Louise waited a few seconds for the sound of the front door, but there was nothing. No Bob or Linda spilling in to figure out what the matter was. Louise had a hard time believing the shouting match couldn't be heard downstairs. More likely, Bob and Linda had ignored it. That seemed to be the new trend around the household.
Yelling at Tina after months of her uncharacteristic snubbing didn't make Louise feel as good as she thought it would.
Louise went back to her homework, only half-focused. Tina got drunk and called Zeke just so she could start a fight.
The Belcher sisters didn't acknowledge each other for three days. Bob and Linda were in the restaurant early and closing late. Louise was in school and detention after. Tina had the apartment mostly to herself and she would go out in the evenings, bar hopping with Jocelyn. Neither Tina or Jocelyn said much to one another. Both young women were just seeking company of a familiar semi-ally.
The present dynamic made everyone avoiding each other very easy. It was decidedly un-Belcher-like.
The fourth night Tina was home, Bob and Linda had closed for the night and came up the stairs whispering loudly to one another. The whispering escalated to talking. Talking escalated to shouting. Linda slammed the front door. Bob called Teddy to pick him up and take him somewhere. The apartment was quiet and empty of parents. Louise could be sure, she'd had her ear pressed to her bedroom door for the whole fight.
Louise made a pit stop in the kitchen for the carton of ice cream and a spoon, then settled on the couch and put on a Hawk and Chick movie as background. Tina was in the living room and on the couch next to her sister before Louise even sensed her presence.
"I've never heard them fight like that before. Do they do that a lot?"
"Sometimes."
"Oh?"
"They're stressed. Things have been really rough lately, T."
"How?" Tina asked, not able to help feeling a little guilty. Was it fair to blame herself for not being around and for moving on to the next chapter of her life? Money was always tight in the Belcher household. What was the point of her parents trying to hide it? Tina admitted to herself she could have done a better job of checking in with her family lately.
"How not? Money rough, business rough, Aunt Gayle rough."
"They were fighting about Aunt Gayle. Is Mom going to stay with her or something?" Tina felt like a scared little kid asking that question, but she didn't know what else to say.
"No. She had to go save Aunt Gayle from being desperate and stupid. What are you? New here?"
"What about Dad and Teddy."
"Bet they're following Mom so Dad can apologize," a small smile curled on Louise's face and Tina knew her sister was basing this assumption off of experience. "Our parents love each other. It's so gross."
"Speaking of gross, I saw Jimmy Jr. today," Tina blurted, conversation about their parents momentarily paused.
"T, no!" Louise dropped the spoon into the carton. Tina picked up the spoon and hijacked the carton. The Belcher family had never been squeamish about germs.
"We didn't do anything. And his butt's flat now, anyway."
"Why?"
"Sometimes people's butts go flat, but it's not nice to point it out."
"No, why did you see Jimmy Jr.?"
"Because, he's familiar."
"Okay," Louise said, not entirely understanding what complex comfort-nostalgia had motivated Tina.
"I told Zeke."
"What did he say?"
"He wasn't happy, but he understands. I'm mad that he isn't more mad at me for it."
"I don't know what to tell you. T."
The sisters were quiet for a few minutes, sitting on the couch and facing one another.
"I'm sorry for yelling at you the other night," Tina said.
"Yeah, I'm sorry too," Louise sighed. "And I'm sorry I called you a 'miserable bitch.' "
"I always felt like you and Dad were so close and Mom and Gene were so close. I felt left out for so long when we were growing up."
"Why didn't you ever say anything?"
"Cause you and Gene made me feel like I belonged. And I knew it wasn't true. Mom and Dad love me, too."
"I don't do hugs," Louise said unprompted.
"I do."
"Don't even think about it."
"Fine."
"I'm sorry I called you spoiled. I just feel like I can't ask for things. Money is always tight. It's the worst right now. It's just really easy to blame it on you and Gene. I haven't even applied to any colleges and it's basically Easter. How the fuck am I going to pay for college?"
"Louise -"
"Gene keeps asking for money. He's trying to keep his stupid costume shop running and Mom says 'yes' to giving him money, but Dad says 'no.' So they end up helping Gene out anyway. Then there's always Aunt Gayle and her bullshit problems. I feel like I can't even bring college up, but Dad keeps hinting at it."
"You need to talk to Mom and Dad."
"Yeah, yeah, maybe. I feel like I can wait a few years for school. I know I want to take over the restaurant. Eventually, in like a hundred years, when I have the patience for that kind of thing. But I want to go to school and keep my options open, too."
"I'm glad you have a plan, but I still think you should talk to Mom and Dad."
"Or we could permanently cut Gene off," Louise suggested.
Louise snatched the spoon and ice cream carton back from Tina. The sisters sat in silence after that, watching Hawk and Chick.
A little while later, Bob and Linda came home to their daughters asleep on the couch, slumped shoulder to shoulder. It was the closest they had seen their daughters together in months.
The last Belcher had graduated high school months before and the mid-September cool was rolling into Seymour's Bay. Louise's friends were moving off to college. She wasn't.
Tina had moved back home from Trenton. She and Zeke had moved into a tiny apartment. Louise was still stuck in Tina's old bedroom in her parent's apartment.
Zeke had recently found an opening at the Glencrest Yacht Club for Tina. This was the catalyst for Tina's agreement to move home. She had come home to build a nest egg with Zeke and to work on their relationship. Tina and Zeke were a lot of things. Stubborn and in love were just two of them.
Louise had not talked to Rudy in months. She had sent text messages and emails to Jessica. Jessica had not responded to a single one. Louise stopped sending messages before Jessica could get the impression Louise might have actually missed her. Before Jessica could get the impression that Louise had thought their summer of fun and flirting had meant something more.
Harley noticed, but didn't say much about it. She and Louise saw each other when Harley came home on weekends. Andy and Ollie were around, but Louise didn't know if she wanted to be around them.
As Louise worked more, she somehow made less. What few tips the family made were pulled together to pay for repairs to restaurant equipment or to scrape up money for rent. The Belchers hadn't been this late with rent money in the better half of a decade.
First the ice cream machine went, so Bob junked it for cash. Then it was the car. It was always something.
Louise found herself trading the dark, grungy clothing she favored for Tina and Gene's hand me downs to make laundry days stretch further. It was money to go to the laundromat and it took time to walk with heavy bags of clothes. The money to replace the Belcher's broken washer was as non-existent as the money for everything else.
Louise got a second job at Wonder Wharf a month after she'd graduated. She worked at the game booths, rotating between the stacked milk bottles that didn't budge when people threw balls at them to a sundry of other scams. Louise, based on childhood experience and Mr. Fischoeder's loose words, would occasionally tamper with the games and make them win-able. If a kid was going to spend their entire allowance on a game or some try-hard high schooler was going to impress his girlfriend, then maybe deserved to get a stuffed animal out of it.
Louise would work at the wharf whenever they could schedule her or whenever she could slink out of the restaurant. Louise saved most of her money for a food truck she'd begun dreaming of and the possibility of a college tuition. A lot of times she snuck a few extra bucks into the cash register at the restaurant. Her parents never said anything, but Louise was sure Linda at least suspected their daughter was trying to help their profits. Linda couldn't prove it because Louise would always balance the till on the days she'd stuffed extra money in the register.
The youngest Belcher would come up with fake math or a creative excuse to explain the extra currency. If Linda had solid evidence, she would have put an end to Louise using her own earned money to bail her and Bob out. Linda and Bob were religious in declaring that their finances were not their children's problem.
Even if Louise gave every penny she'd earned to her parents, she knew it still wouldn't rectify everything, especially things that weren't money related. At night, Louise would come home from Wonder Wharf and hear her parents in their room, hushed whispers of contingency plans, budgeting and stacking loans.
It really wasn't a secret, Tina knew everything that Zeke knew. Gene knew more than he let on, but he pretended to be oblivious, thinking it helped Bob's wounded pride.
Louise knew what was going on. It was damn near impossible to hide when you lived under the same roof. It was also very obvious when Bob and Linda had sat Louise down a few days after her graduation and told her they might not be able to afford to pay her for much longer.
Bob and Linda may have thought their finances weren't Louise's problem, but as long as she was living under their roof and wanting to take over their restaurant, she would vehemently disagree.
The talk with her parents had been prophetic. After Tina started working at the yacht club with Zeke, Zeke had quit working at the restaurant. At least for as long as Bob was unable to pay him. Louise suspected this was after a long and honest conversation only Zeke and Bob had been part of. They just couldn't afford to pay Zeke anymore. They couldn't pay Louise, but still pulled her weight at the restaurant, even with a second job. The Belchers tightened their belts again.
One night that winter, a bundled up Louise came home from the Wharf, not closed, but not as popular with the inclimate weather. She found the restaurant still open. It was hours past closing and no one was behind the counter or in the kitchen.
The door to the basement was open. Louise followed the stairs down and sat down on the last step next to her father. Bob didn't move at first, then he looked over at his daughter. His eyes were red and his cheeks were wet.
"Your mom is staying with Gretchen tonight."
"Why? What's going on?" Louise demanded.
Bob was quiet for a little while, debating on whether or not he should share the information with his daughter.
She'd never seen her father cry before, not like this, tears filled with so much anguish and despair.
It terrified her.
Bob and Linda had a fight. Linda was in charge of the book keeping. Linda had been asking Gloria and Al for some help with the finances. Gloria and Al and been lending Linda money for a few months now. Linda had also been applying for part time jobs. Even after the Fresh Feed disaster a decade before. Linda had not mentioned anything or discussed any of this with Bob.
Bob had seen something in the mail from Linda's parents. He'd opened it and discovered a very generous check. Then he'd combed through bank statements. When he approached Linda with papers of the offending evidence, she didn't deny any of it. Bob had gotten angry and he'd raised his voice. Linda raised her voice, too.
Would he have accepted the help from her parents had he known about it, she'd asked him. He had said he would not have.
Would he have been supportive of her getting a second job for the long term, she'd asked. He had said he wasn't sure. Louise knew "not sure" was just a thinly disguised "no." Mostly because she'd suspected having Linda in the suck with him was the only thing that got Bob out of bed anymore.
Without Linda there to keep him functioning, Bob would have been struggling more than the restaurant was. It was selfish to keep Linda and Louise so tightly by his side, all three of them knew that.
It was also necessary. Linda and Louise had an unspoken rule about not leaving Bob alone for too long. They elected not to talk about why and how much Bob had really been suffering, but in this moment, Louise saw how much worse for her father not talking about his depression really was.
He needed help, he admitted. But first he needed to find Linda.
It was the end of the line and the Belchers were one wrong move from losing the restaurant, the roof over their heads, and maybe each other.
And there Bob was, thinking about what he'd said and how he'd made the love of his life feel. How all he'd managed to do was sit there feeling sorry for himself.
"You fucked up, Dad."
"I know."
"You owe Mom an apology. Like yesterday."
"I get it."
"You need help, Dad. When I didn't see anyone in the restaurant I thought maybe you'd…"
"I know."
Before Bob knew it, he and his daughter were rushing through cleaning and closing the restaurant. Before Bob knew it, he and his daughter were getting bundled up to make the long trek to Gretchen's place. And before Bob knew it, he was at Gretchen's front door hugging Linda tighter than he had in years and apologizing through more tears.
Linda grabbed her things, thanked Gretchen for letting her stay, and walked back home with her husband and daughter.
The next day Linda heard back from Spare Change Lanes. She'd landed herself a part time job at the bowling alley. Bob was supportive. He and Linda agreed it was time to reconsider some things. They had a lot of talking and figuring out to do, but they were going to do it together.
Bob took his crappy insurance and got in to see a therapist. He begrudgingly took more time off at the recommendation of his therapist. Louise took on even more responsibility at the restaurant. Sometimes running the entire place herself for a few days at a time.
After Linda landed her part time job, Louise used some earnings from Wonder Wharf to make flyers and advertisements. Louise didn't consult or inform her parents. She acted first and thought later, as was her partial trademark.
She handed out flyers at the wharf, she stuck them in purses and strollers when she walked by unsuspecting Wonder Wharf patrons. She set flyers out at the game booths when she was working. She had Teddy clandestinely hand them out to clients. She had Mort and her mother set them out of the countertops at the funeral home and the bowling alley.
Louise even walked around Seymour's Bay at night, after Wonder Wharf closed, and stapled her flyers to telephone poles throughout the town's neighborhoods.
Business picked up very slowly. It could have been the flyers or it could have been a change of luck. Louise didn't know which it was, but did the reason really matter?
The Belcher's financial situation improved bit by bit. It was amazing how the extra bucks from Linda's part time job made a difference when they were below rock bottom. Louise chose not to share this opinion with her father. She'd felt she'd long since made her point.
Another late summer had rolled around. Logan Bush was twenty-five. He'd just broken up with Shanaya for the sixth time, rekindling after college graduation in a cycle of continuous failure. He'd just bought a house in town. He'd just started a job with a marketing firm outside of Bog Harbor. He commuted to work, tied one on with Scotty during the weekends, and skateboarded a few times a month when he was feeling whimsical. He was Cynthia's sounding board for all of her complaints. He spent a lot of time with his mother. Sometimes he wondered if it was too much time.
Logan wandered around Seymour's Bay. He got his own plot at the community garden and inadvertently killed everything he grew, he took evening jogs along the cove near the lighthouse, he skateboarded in the park. Then he rediscovered Wonder Wharf.
He started coming at the beginning of the summer when he and Shanaya had broken up for the final time and Scotty was constantly working late. It helped fill his time. He felt a little nostalgic. He'd stuff his face and ride the rides until he made himself sick. Then he moved on to arcade games until he got so skilled at them, the lack of challenge was no longer appealing.
He graduated to the game booths. He'd never been able to crack the code. They were obviously rigged, but he was stubborn, so he kept throwing money at the situation, because that's how Tom and Cynthia had taught him to solve his problems.
Louise noticed Logan roaming around Wonder Wharf. She found it annoying, but if he kept his distance from her, she could ignore him. She could make a big show of ignoring him, too. Until she couldn't. Because all he ever seemed to do was play at the game booths.
Louise wouldn't trust Logan Bush as far as she could throw him. The look on her face when he was around told him as much.
She liked to call him out on everything, especially if she noticed some perceived cheating or bending of the rules. Louise knew all the tricks, because she'd pulled all the tricks.
"If you're gonna pull that amateur level shit, you can schlep it down to Family Funtime," she told him.
"No can do, Smellcher, I got banned from there, like, ten years ago. They still have my picture up on their stupid board. Broke a Skee-Ball machine."
"That's cute. I got banned for orchestrating a sting. Almost took home that mini-electric car they had on display for, like, ever. Sorry you can't swing with the big boys."
Sometimes Louise was surrounded by friends. Two boys who looked almost identical and didn't seem too bright or a pretty girl with a dark complexion who never seemed to stop talking.
Most of the time, Louise was not surrounded by friends.
Louise Belcher had a bad attitude and she called him out on everything and it didn't take Logan Bush too long to realize he liked that. He liked it a lot. There was something appealing about someone who wouldn't take shit from him. There was something appealing about someone who could play hard to get.
Except Louise wasn't playing and she thought he was a jackass. Logan didn't know how to change the way she saw him.
He casually mentioned his important new job and fancy new house.
Louise was nineteen and too wise to fall for a "Full-of-Shit-Pretty-Boy". Louise teased him about his seeming lack of hobbies. How he had to bring material things into conversation to make up for his lack of personality and redeeming qualities. Louise also teased Logan about how well dressed he always seemed to be these days.
Logan changed tactics. He tried asking Louise to get coffee with him, instead of bragging. It was simple and non-materialistic. He thought she would appreciate it.
Secretly Louise was impressed with the maturity and consideration, but this was still Logan Bush. So she told him no. She had standards and she would not fall prey to some possible trap set by her former nemesis. Though she wasn't entirely convinced it was a trap. She wasn't entirely uninterested in him, either. Logan Bush was stubborn. She liked stubborn. She could respect stubborn.
She was okay with being in denial that Logan Bush could have grown up into a real and decent person. She was okay with being in denial that Logan Bush was also a human being with feelings.
Logan occasionally came to Wonder Wharf after that summer, but he'd showed up less and less into the fall. After a while, Louise almost forgot about the interactions and that there was once a time where Logan frequented Wonder Wharf on a near daily basis.
By twenty, Louise had started college, taking New Jersey up on it's offer of free in-state community college.
Her grades were excellent, her social life wasn't. Her work at the restaurant was excellent, her communication with her parents sometimes wasn't.
Linda and Louise had taken to sitting in the apartment late at night, but seperate from one another. Louise focused on her classes. Linda focused on catching up with Ginger or doing the book keeping that stressed Bob out too much.
Bob was asleep and Linda had just gotten off the phone with Ginger. Louise was sitting at the kitchen table. She powered down her laptop after finishing a paper. She couldn't will herself to look at anymore course work that night and she'd vaguely been listening in on her mother's conversation, anyway
Linda had been gossiping with Ginger about Gene and Alex's costume shop and how it had finally begun to get off the ground. Then Gene thought he was going to have to close down, because he couldn't make ends meet. Then things began to look up again. Then they began to look up a little more. The last two years should have shown all of the Belchers that none of them got their savvy business and management skills from their father. Louise would not be doomed like her father and brother, she'd often told herself. She would learn from their mistakes, even if it took her twice as long to meet her goals as it had taken the rest of them.
"We raised two good kids and a Louise. We did what we could," Linda said in reference to Gene as she took a matter-of-fact sip of her wine and put the phone back in the cradle. Linda had made this statement more to herself than her youngest child, but she was looking at her daughter as the words left her mouth. Maybe for confirmation. Maybe to prove a point.
"If you didn't own a restaurant, you probably couldn't have afforded to feed Gene."
Linda chuckled and took a seat at the kitchen table, "I'm proud of you kids. You weird, creative kids."
Louise smiled weakly. Linda poured her daughter a glass of wine, "Thanks?"
"It's not the worst thing your Momma's done," Linda shrugged.
"This isn't the worst thing I've done today," Louise said, it had become a tried and true stock phrase developing in her teen years and continuing into the present.
"There are some things your Momma doesn't need to know," Linda topped off her own glass, "but tell me anyway. What's the worst thing you did today?"
Louise told her mother about the guy she'd been seeing. How he had been slimey and a jerk. How Louise knew she should trust her instincts. How, deep down, she knew this guy wasn't worth it. How just because he was older, didn't mean he wasn't the dumb one. How he liked to gaslight her and she knew it, because she was a master at gaslighting people herself. How after dealing with this bastard, she wouldn't gaslight anyone again. At least not unless they really deserved it. She didn't leave out the details of running him out of the restaurant with a broom earlier that day. She'd shouted at him about how she was done with him and how he wouldn't be coming back as he skidded down Ocean Avenue and out of sight.
Linda tilted her head back and laughed. Louise was always grateful for her mother, but she truly felt it blossomed as she grew older. She wanted to say something, but Louise had always been better at being there than using her words. When she was with her father she didn't need to say anything, it was just understood. When she was with her siblings, it was always action oriented.
"Your father and I promised each other, when I was pregnant with your sister, that we would never stop our kids from being who they were, unless it was dangerous. And sometimes that still didn't work with you."
"You're welcome."
"You see how your father and your Pop-Pop get along. We never wanted you kids to feel that way with us. We never wanted to force it."
"What about you?"
"Where do you think you get your crazy from? You get it from me."
"Really? I always saw it as more of an Aunt Gayle situation."
"You saw how your Aunt Gayle turned out. I could have done worse at raising you. I didn't want you kids to end up like that."
"Oh, Mom, does Aunt Gayle know that's what you think?"
"Mouth shut about your aunt, Miss Missy!" Linda exclaimed. She hid her huge smile behind her glass, trying to avoid encouraging her daughter further.
Louise shrugged and sat with her mother in the kitchen. They took turns shit-talking all non-present family members, excluding Bob and anyone he had helped bring into the world. Louise never realized how many untasteful thoughts Linda kept to herself. She approved of her mother's well hidden sense of humor.
Louise had always been certain of one thing, if she could count on nothing else, she could always count on her family. Moments like this just helped to reinforce that certainty.
Louise sat in a cart on the Ferris Wheel, bundled up as the late fall air and high altitude brought a chill to the air. She was slowly approaching the top. The Wonder Wharf Ferris Wheel had been central to some very important moments in Louise's life and equally as central to the quiet nights alone the youngest Belcher craved.
The sun had set over the bay shining a dim, murky twilight over the wharf and Ocean Avenue. Louise sat in the moment, but had her mind firmly on the weight of the future. The twenty-one-year-old had just closed the deal on her food truck and she would start operating tomorrow. She'd quit her job at Wonder Wharf earlier that day.
Louise had spent the last few weeks mapping out routes across Seymour's Bay. Walking around town in the evening to construct a mental database of where the busiest and best for business areas were. She spent a chunk of change of her most recent paycheck to print basic flyers she'd designed and plastered them around town when she went on her evening surveys. She'd also left stacks of flyers under the counter in the restaurant and used them as place mats. If you were going to steal your own customers, at least start with the ones that proved themselves loyal by coming into the restaurant regularly. Louise trounced down to Bog Harbor and King's Head Island on a few separate days, waking up earlier than she ever thought necessary.
She left some flyers in Gene and Alex's Broadway Costume Shop. She also scattered flyers around the ferry to King's Head Island, as best could without looking suspicious. While stapling flyers to telephone poles on the island, She'd run into Sasha. She'd handed him a generous stack of flyers and he'd agreed to spread the word as best he could. Louise had personally seen the power flyers had on drawing in customers. She was willing to replicate a possible success, just with less sticking flyers in people's personal effects.
Now that Bob could afford to pay his employees and Zeke had returned to working for Bob again part time. Linda still worked a day or two a week at the bowling alley, but spent most of her time in the restaurant. Louise felt more positive about the restaurant's future. She felt okay about stepping back a little bit.
Louise knew she was taking a big risk. She'd accepted she might have to keep living with her parents until she had her business degree in hand and didn't have to worry about the extra expenses of books and a laptop she was still trying to pay off. That and the whole point of putting away all of the extra earnings until she'd had that money to purchase the food truck outright and pay for any insurance, gasoline, repairs, and the like.
Louise was determined to prove to her father that it would work. Louise was still technically mooching off Bob's Burgers because all her inventory came from their inventory. And technically the food truck would just be an extension of the fixed location. And technically her paycheck was from the restaurant, but she was formally on payroll again, and had been for the last year. It was taxable income.
She worked in a restaurant. It just happened to be owned by her parents. And she just happened to have designs on taking it over one day in the extremely distant future. She just happened to have quit a second job that she didn't really hate. She did it so that she would have the time to run the food truck. Quitting her job at Wonder Wharf was a little more difficult emotionally than Louise thought it was going to be. She'd almost talked herself out of it. She'd tried to come up with plans to work at Wonder Wharf and the restaurant while running the food truck, all while still going to school. It could have worked if Louise never slept another day in her life.
She was resolved to finish this business degree, with some classes and personal studies into economics and financial management. It was simple, really. She was going to open other locations of "Bob's Burgers" or "Belcher's Burgers" and expand the menu. But first she had to test her management skills on a smaller scale. This is where the food truck came in and this was her real purpose behind wanting the damn thing so badly. If it failed, she would know when to cut her losses and look for jobs outside of the restaurant industry.
The cart made it's ascent to the top of the Ferris Wheel. Louise could see everything around her and it felt slightly prophetic. Her nerves and excitement were getting to her all at once and mixing around the butterflies in her stomach. She smiled to herself despite all the uncertainty and confusion in her midst.
For this moment, in this one moment, she was on top of everything. She felt like Queen of the Wharf.