Author's Note: Thank you for the all the interest in this story so far. Thank you for all the feedback on this story.
There will be some flashbacks in the story. I'll mark them as best I can. There will be "good memories" and "bad memories." This chapter contains a "bad memory" at the very end that serves to help illustrate why she left. I hope it isn't too over the top, but it is supposed to show how bad Naruto was to her. So he might be a touch OOC?
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or its characters. I do not own the title of the fic; that belongs to Pierce the Veil.
Bedless
'Cause you don't even know you're an angel
Foolish am I for the times I come and go
These stars defy love, so I close my eyes
And sleep inside your worn-in bed outline
-Pierce the Veil
Chapter 3
Hinata
Hinata waited anxiously for Kakashi to show up. There were some customers milling around, lounging in chairs reading, or sipping coffee and chatting. She felt more comfortable having people around her.
The door chime sang out, announcing a new arrival.
To Hinata's immense relief, it was Kakashi after all. He unwrapped a great thick scarf from his face, revealing that strange thin coverup beneath. His silver hair was still wind-sprung, though it looked as if an attempt had been made to style it.
"Good afternoon," he said, striding over to the counter.
"Good afternoon," she answered, tilting her head down to avoid looking directly at him.
"So, sensei, what are you going to show me today?" he asked, teasing her.
"What? Oh, no. Um…" She was stalling.
What had she planned on showing him for today?
"Just take a breath," he suggested. "I'm a fast learner and I'm not in any hurry."
"Okay." She breathed, in the same manner her therapist had taught her.
"Better?"
"Yeah." She bit her lip to keep from stuttering. Hinata hadn't stuttered this much since… She preferred not to think of that time. "Better. I'll show you the coffee station?"
It had come out as more a question. She had never trained anyone in her life. In fact, this was only her second job. Before, even before she was married, she worked at a bookstore because it felt comfortable. She had not owned the bookstore, not even close, but she had learned some of the basics of running one.
When Hinata had married Naruto, he had wanted her to give up working. His income, as a police officer had been enough at the time, to sustain them both. He had convinced her to leave a good, full-time job to stay at home and clean. It would be best for when the baby arrived, when there was a baby.
Being at home had been more boring than she liked to admit. Their flat was tiny and there had not been much to do. Hinata had turned back to her first love, reading. She had read everything she could get her hands on.
But that was a lifetime away now, it seemed. Kakashi Hatake, whoever he was really, was here with her now, waiting patiently for directions.
"Sorry, drifted away for a moment," she mumbled.
"No reason to apologize," he said. "Like I said, I've got all afternoon."
Hinata began showing him all the bells and whistles of her coffee machines. Her voice shook, but held for the most part as she explained. Her recipes were fairly simple: coffee, whipped cream, and syrup. Or some variation on that.
Kakashi did fine with the brewing the coffee; he was an expert, just as he claimed. His whipped cream and syrup work needed some fine tuning. Hinata's customers didn't seem to mind too much either way.
"I'll move onto the stock then?" Hinata asked, feeling stupid for asking. She was the boss after all.
Kakashi told her as much.
She showed him around the store, all the different genres and areas. Her store was small, compared to one of the big-box ones, but it was cozy. Hinata had a lot of fiction, but she did a healthy business in special orders for obscure things.
Kakashi paused in front of the romance, well erotic books. Hinata worked hard to suppress a blush. She enjoyed these types of books very rarely now. Hers tended to be more cozy mysteries and fantasy now.
"Do you read these?" she asked.
"Sometimes." As if awaking out of a fog, he followed her to their next destination in the store. There was a bunch of paperwork for him to fill out so Hinata let him sit at one of the café tables with one of her brews.
Hinata noticed some of the glances her newest employee was getting, especially from the women. She couldn't stop the little surge of inexplicable jealousy that overtook her at the counter.
You can't even see his face! She reminded herself angrily.
But his skintight mask did not leave much to the imagination. Unless there was some super-gross scarring under there, Hinata had all idea that her newest employee was quite a babe, using one of Ino's choice phrases.
"Here you go," he said about an hour later. Everything was neat and orderly, his handwriting almost beautiful.
"Thank you. Come back tomorrow." She said it firmly this time. "How about when I open, around eight?"
"Great. I'll see you at eight. And I'll also stop rhyming so much Himawari," he told her with a wink of those fathomless grey eyes.
"Okay," and she laughed. The sound almost surprised her; it had been so long. She was temporarily caught off guard; it was real and genuine.
And it didn't stop, not for a while, until she was alone. But even when she was alone, it wasn't as bad as it had been the other day.
Kakashi
The time at the store had been very beneficial for him. He had seen some of the innerworkings of a bookstore, and his storyline had changed again.
The muse opens a bookstore after an unhappy marriage and now she's trying to make it work, with a new love interest.
Ugh. Too much like himself. He somehow just couldn't resist inserting himself into the narrative.
But he had noticed the light spot on her ring finger, where there had been something at one time. So, she had been married, he assumed, taking a page out of a Sherlock story.
So, scratch the love interest. His heroine needed something else. But what?
"Ugh!" He ran his hands through his mass of silver hair. Why was this so difficult?
In his other novels, not only would the hero have had the woman in his bed, someone else would have had her by now and in multiple ways. Maybe he should go back to writing that dribble!
Her bookstore, he noted with a little pride, had some of his books and they were not collecting dust but looked like reasonably new copies.
Pakkun, his smallest dog, came over and pushed him with his cold, wet nose. Ever the trendsetter, all the other dogs came bounding up for a walk.
Maybe a walk was the best idea right now. Clear his head. His storylines were mixing with his real life.
There was no denying that Himawari was a beautiful woman. He had noticed that when just walking by.
But when he had made her smile and laugh, his whole perspective about her had changed.
She was radiant. All of her darkness that she wore like a shadow had disappeared for just that instant.
Kakashi decided, as he and the dogs banged their way down the steps of the apartment, that his main character would have the same smile; the same laugh too.
He and the dogs headed to the nearby park for a jog. He tried not to think about much of anything as they ran laps. With eight, former strays all it took was one momentary loss of concentration and things would go tumbling.
Naruto
When he woke up, his mouth tasted like cotton balls. He moved his tongue around in his mouth woodenly, feeling each and every dry crevice.
A drum was playing just behind his eyeballs; when he tried to move, it seemed like a whole concert was now raging on, using his head as a stadium.
He was used to waking up in places he didn't recognize, sometimes with people he didn't know.
But the person in front of him was someone he recognized; not only recognized, but knew very well.
"Sasuke?" he asked, blearily. His hand was already searching for a drink, whether this was his home or not.
"Yeah. It's me, Uzumaki." Somber, Uchiha Sasuke swam into view.
Naruto hadn't seen him since they had been through training together. He had heard that Sasuke had progressed through the force rapidly, making detective really fast while Naruto had remained on the beat.
"What do you want?" he grumbled. A glass of water appeared in his hand, two painkillers in the other.
"I need you to sober up enough to answer some questions about your wife's disappearance," Sasuke said.
Hinata
When Hinata got up in the mornings over the next week, it was no longer quite the struggle she remembered. She was getting up a few minutes earlier than her alarm each time. Her cup of coffee didn't seem to take nearly as long to drink, didn't have to revive her as much.
Just small changes that she couldn't really explain away, other than she had been, perhaps, a little lonely after all.
While she and Kakashi were not talking about any more than their work, she felt a bond of sorts with him none the less. He was attentive and tried hard to learn, asked a lot of questions about her processes, about the stock.
She allowed him to work with the customers, to handle some of the transactions, make the coffee. It was refreshing being able to get time to finish putting away books and completing orders. Ino had been right, she did need some good help.
The others she had hired had not measured up to Kakashi's standard. By the end of the second day, they had already driven her up the wall, by the end of the week they had already stopped showing up on time.
When Hinata came down from her flat, Kakashi was waiting at the door patiently, his breath puffing out in the chilly fall air. After letting him in, she would make them both another cup of coffee.
On the first morning, Hinata had been curious about how he was going to drink the coffee without removing his mask.
"Do you ever go without it?" she asked, then realized she had pretty much just blurted it out.
"Oh, this?" Without much thought, he tugged the mask down over a shapely nose and lips, revealing smooth, clear skin on one side. The other side had a long, pink scar that she had not noticed as much when his face was covered. It actually bisected his left eye. How had she not noticed that and why was she noticing it now?
He was much younger than she thought, no wrinkles or acne pockmarks. Probably in his thirties.
Hinata felt a familiar flutter in her chest, but she squashed it down. Best not to even invite that door to open.
"So why?" she asked, although she probably suspected.
"Well, the girls all go for it," he smiled. Hinata couldn't help be reminded of the toughened hero in a romance, who was finally letting his identity crack. "Secret identity, you know?"
Hinata was almost sure that he was hiding something, but she didn't press. After all, she wasn't who he thought she was either.
She had watched him drink the coffee down, his Adam's apple bobbing slightly with the reflex. Hinata hadn't meant to stare, but it had been so long since she had been this close to a man.
More feelings and memories were threatening to come back through the void. Hinata mentally slammed them down and locked them away again.
"Good cup of coffee," Kakashi told her.
"Thanks."
When he was finished, he had deftly tugged the mask back up. And they had continued on this way ever since, their ritual.
Hinata was starting to finally relax a little, after a year of running scared, trying to keep her business running, worrying about whether Naruto was going to come back. But it seemed, that for the time being, it wouldn't kill her to relax a bit.
A Bad Memory
Hinata could hear the grumble of Naruto's engine outside, a bead of sweat dribbling down her back. His car had a very distinct sound.
Dinner was not ready and it didn't taste the way she was hoping it would.
The car door slammed and she knew, any moment now he would be heading up the stone walk to their flat.
She panicked, trying to stir everything at once and trying to check her appearance. Since the miscarriage…
Naruto liked her to look a certain way: hair piled on her head, face painted like one of those women on the Real Housewives show, skin-tight dress that held her breasts high and showed her milky thighs.
When it was Hinata alone, she preferred the comfort of big, clingy clothes and soft, stretchy pants. She liked keeping her hair down and the makeup to a minimum.
Normally Hinata, was pretty good at basic foods. Naruto really preferred ramen in all different ways. But today, house chores had taken way too long to complete. Naruto had done a lot of damage to their flat; breaking things and spilling things.
She sucked at a burned finger as she tried to combine things into bowls. This wasn't going to work.
The door opened and she could hear him stumbling in, the odd obscenity making its way toward her.
Shit!
She tried to put things on the table, but liquid was sloshing everywhere on her hand, the dress…
"Hinata!" he shouted. She cringed. He could make her name sound like a dirty word.
"Y-y-yes, d-d-dear?" she asked. There was a lump in her throat.
She would wonder why the neighbors never called the police, never made a report. Hinata guessed it was because Naruto usually drove his squad car home and he told them a lie she had heard him tell people from work: "Oh you know the little wife likes it rough. Daddy issues."
"Is dinner ready?"
"Y-y-y-y-y-"
"Is it or isn't it, you dumb bitch?" he roared. He was worse when he was hungry and drunk. She felt a flash of anger color her vision.
"Yes," she finally said, fingers itching to pick up the frying pan and stun him, give him a taste of his own medicine. Maybe tonight, she would.
"Good." He sat down at the table, reaching for the sake bottle she had just put out; sans cup. She watched for a moment as he gulped greedily.
Hinata resumed her usual seat across from him, but waited for him to dig in first. He was drunk so hopefully he wouldn't be able to taste what she had burned or notice that some things were only half-cooked through.
He began wolfing down his food, without so much as a thank you, or a consideration for maybe how her day had gone. She had these cheerful imaginary conversations in her head, based mostly on memories from their first year of marriage.
Suddenly, Naruto spit the food back out. It was disgusting, and she had to turn away.
"What are you trying to do, you filthy whore? Poison me?"
It was like something out of a bad Lifetime movie, but it was really happening to her, and she couldn't stop it. She didn't know how to stop it because she didn't really know how it started.
He jumped up from the table with more speed than Hinata thought possible, grabbed her by the hair and wrenched her down to the floor.
"What am I supposed to do now?" he spat. Hinata could feel angry, hot tears, welling up in her eyes. Her head ached, her knees bruised from where she had landed hard on them.
"S-s-s-s-stop, p-p-p-p-p-p-p-please!" she cried. Her hair felt like it was being torn from her scalp. "I-i-i-i'm s-s-s-s-sorry!" she whimpered over and over again, although she really had nothing to be sorry for.
Naruto let up from her hair, but he kept her pinned to the floor.
"Why wasn't dinner finished? Hm? Were you fucking someone else?" he shouted, spit flying into her face. "Is that aftershave I can smell on you?"
Naruto ran a salacious hand up her thigh, pushing the dress up to her hips. "Is that his cum I feel between your legs?" He ripped at her underwear; it was not romantic as the movies depicted. It hurt, she could feel her flesh tearing with the effort.
Finally, the fabric gave and he began touching her. "Did you spread your legs for him like you do me?"
His face was dangerously close to her own, his voice low and insistent now. Hot, foul breath washed over her, making her nauseous. "Do I need to teach you a lesson?" he asked.
"No!" she sobbed. What had changed? Just a few months ago, she would have willingly stripped down and lay on the table for him if he wanted her. "N-n-no, no one else has had me Naruto! P-p-p-lease, believe me!"
Her hips ached, she could feel little welts of blood collecting beneath her dress. Those stains would be tough to get out tomorrow.
"Hmmm." He buried his face in the tendrils of her hair that had come down from the complicated twist she had tamed it into, fingers now reaching for her breasts.
Hinata sobbed and was never quite sure what came over her as she grabbed one of the discarded dishes that had not managed to break when Naruto had grabbed her from the chair.
In the blink of an eye, she had the china plate up and was smacking him up the side of the head with it. It smashed, spraying her with little shards. Naruto wasn't knocked out, but he was stunned.
Hinata, surprised, pushed him off of her and tried to run. Her whole body hurt. This wasn't an escape plan. This wasn't anything. She had no idea, and now, he would probably kill her.
There was a roar behind her that sent shivers down her spine. It was almost inhuman, as if he were no more man than beast. Hinata ran for the stairs, hoping that might slow him up. She regretted not running for the door when she had the chance. Why hadn't she? She was truly no better than those girls in the horror movies she had shouted at when she was young.
Naruto grabbed her ankle and pulled her down a few steps. The hardwood hurt, but Hinata brushed it aside to fight. She kicked wildly, heedless of what the consequences were going to be, an animal instinct awakened. But, she just wasn't strong enough, not anymore.
Though she fought, all the way to the top of the stairs, fought all the way into the bedroom, she couldn't fight the unspeakable things he did to her in their bed...