Tamaki's phone buzzed where it balanced on top of his textbook. The girl sitting across from him glanced up, then back down at her notebook. Tamaki gripped his pen tighter, hesitating on the word he had been writing. He hadn't studied at a library on campus in ages. Usually he preferred his own desk, but it had been hard to stay in his room after what had happened yesterday. It was hard to be alone with his thoughts.

It buzzed again.

It could be Mirio.

The two hadn't really spoken all day. They couldn't avoid each other even if they wanted to, since they shared most of the same classes. And walked to all those classes together with Nejire, who clearly knew something was up but mercifully didn't press the issue. Mirio hadn't ignored him, not exactly.

But he had only talked to him with Nejire around, and even then with that glassy show of friendliness he used on everyone else at school.

He had never used it on Tamaki before.

The third time his phone buzzed the girl studying across from him looked up deliberately, and he murmured something apologetic before snatching the phone.

Two new messages from Nejire. He couldn't tell if he was relieved or disappointed.

Are one of you gonna tell me what's going on?

Later, I'm studying

The phone buzzed back right away.

I'll be at your room in twenty

I'm at the library

Wow, something really is up huh

Tamaki frowned at the screen. She didn't wait for him to respond.

On my way!

"Hmm, yep. Now that makes more sense."

"What?" Tamaki blinked. They were walking back to the dorms together, Tamaki hesitantly recounting the events of last night, his voice dropping low when other students passed.

He had made a great effort to cut out the more adult details.

It was not the reaction he was expecting from Nejire at the end of spilling his guts.

"Mirio did a pretty poor job of explaining it."

"What? You already talked to him!" Tamaki accused angrily.

"I had to get the full story!" Nejire threw her hands up, feigning innocence as Tamaki fumed. "I should have come to you first though, your version was much more... coherent. Mirio gave me a lot of unnecessary details ..."

"Stop, stop," Tamaki's cheeks burned. "I can't believe you."

"You're BOTH my friends. I'm not trying to pick one, I'm trying to get you back together."

There was silence as they took a shortcut through a hallway and walked past a crowd of underclassmen.

"So... what did he say?" Tamaki muttered. Nejire studied his expression for a long moment and sighed.

"The important takeaways were that things went too far and he's scared he hurt you in the process."

"Why would he- I'm the one who let it go too far. I should have said- " his rushed speech dropped away as they stepped to the side of the walkway to let a group pass. "It's not that I didn't want to, I do. It's just-"

"Just?" Nejire cocked her head to the side.

"Even if I want to, everytime I get close like that… I start to feel sick. And like, I can't breathe."

"It's your anxiety, right?" Nejire questioned softly.

He nodded.

"But when I drank it kind of faded away."

"That's why you came out with us, isn't it?" Nejire pouted.

Tamaki looked guilty. "It felt like my hands could move before my brain could panic. Like I could make myself go farther."

"Tamaki..." Tamaki wasn't looking at her face but he could hear the frown on it. "That sounds, kinda problematic."

"I see that now," he said resentfully. "I just wanted to give Mirio more. He deserves more."

"What do you mean?" Nejire frowned.

"I've been thinking about it ever since we started, whatever this is."

"Tamaki..." They turned the corner that led up a stone walkway to their dorm, and Nejire's pace slowed. "Has Mirio ever told you that?"

"Told me what?"

"That he wanted more?"

"He-" Tamaki started, stopped, and started again. "He doesn't have to. I know."

Nejire leaned her back on the lamppost and frowned down at her shoes.

"You're doing the thing you always do."

"What thing?" he said hesitantly.

"You get in your own head! You tell yourself what other people think about you!"

"I-" Tamaki made to protest but Nejire shushed him.

"Yes, you do! If Mirio never told you that, then why do you think it?" She was bristling, and her anger took him aback for a minute.

"I don't know..." he mumbled.

"Well! I'll tell you what I know." She flashed him an encouraging smile. "Mirio adores you. I know he cares more about you than about doing all that stuff."

"But-"

"Shh. Tamaki, If I know Mirio as well as I know I do, then the only person who thinks you need to do that stuff is you."

The words sliced through Tamaki's mood.

Had he been in his own head the whole time?

"You should talk to him soon, hear it from him."

"I don't know if I can do that right now…" his head was still swirling on her last words.

"Then just don't wait too long, okay?" She gave his hand a tender squeeze, but her expression was downturned. "No wallowing."

When Tamaki stepped out of the shower his phone screen, balanced atop a pile of clean clothes, was lit up with a solitary message.

Can we talk? In my room?

He grabbed his towel and wrapped it over his shoulders, more of an attempt to keep warm than to dry off. Part of him wanted to close the curtain and turn the shower back on, put his head against the wall and pretend that the warm, steamy room was everything.

He hadn't thought about what to say yet.

He hadn't prepared himself for what Mirio might say either.

But he also knew the only thing he hated more than their final confrontation was the silence that came after it.

His phone lit up again, drawing his eye to the screen. He peered over, his long hair dripping. A drop hit the screen and splashed over the message.

Please.

He sighed and hugged the towel tighter around himself, shivering.

His hair was just beginning to dry into a mess of untamed strands when he reached Mirio's door. He reached his hand out to knock and retracted it, then did it again, before opting to just try the knob. The door swung open with no resistance.

"Hey," Tamaki said meekly. "It's me."

Mirio looked up from his laptop, saw Tamaki, and slowly closed the screen. He was leaning up against the headboard of his bed, legs crossed in front of him, laptop balanced on his thighs.

"Hey," Mirio's voice was as guarded as his expression.

Tamaki closed the door behind him, but he couldn't will himself to walk any deeper into the room.

"Um… I really messed up." Tamaki's hands were clutching his elbows, his arms crossed in front of him.

Mirio frowned but said nothing.

Tamaki kept talking, desperate to cut the silence.

"Sometimes I get in my own head, and I make myself believe things. I think…"

His voice dipped out, breath catching in his throat.

"I think I've been telling myself I'm not enough for you."

Part of him believed that when Mirio opened his mouth he might agree. He might tell Tamaki that was what he had been feeling all along, and Tamaki would unravel at the confession.

Instead Mirio looked up from his hands with a small, sad smile.

"You're everything to me."

Tamaki felt his eyes welling with moisture. He scrubbed at them frantically with the sleeves of his sweater.

"I didn't know what you would expect from me, now that we're..."

"Together? I wish you had told me sooner. You've been worrying about this for a while, haven't you?"

Tamaki's head bobbed.

Mirio swung his legs off the bed and got to his feet, holding his arms out in an open invitation. Tamaki took a tremulous step forward, then another, then strode across the room towards Mirio's embrace. Mirio leaned down and nestled his face in the other's still-damp hair, breathing in his familiar smell.

"This is enough for me, really. Just holding you like this."

Relief washed over Tamaki like a wave, the release of a day of dismal thoughts.

But.

He pulled back to look up at Mirio's blue eyes with a tearful determination.

"I'm going to try. I want to."

"Tamaki…" Mirio began but he shook his head, balling his fists in Mirio's shirt.

"I'm serious. I liked seeing you that way…" It was Mirio's turn to look embarrassed, ducking his gaze from Tamaki's. "I just need to go slow, so…"

His dark eyes shone, throat bobbing.

"So don't give up on me."

"Promise."

Mirio got a mischievous sparkle in his eye, and before Tamaki had time to react the blonde had grabbed him and let himself freefall onto the bedspread, bringing Tamaki down with him.

Tamaki's face hit the mattress with a thump, and Mirio laughed as he pushed himself back upright.

"You're ridiculous," Tamaki pouted.

"Mm, I know," Mirio flashed a crooked grin. "But you love it."

"I do…"

Mirio hadn't been expecting that, and it showed when his grin wavered. His expression was soft, his gaze distant.

"I do love you."

Mirio sat up and leaned into Tamaki, resting his hands on top of the other's. He kissed him, ever so softly.

"I love you too."