Chapter 12

The Pros and Cons of Moving to Boston: A Non-Definitive List

by Jesse Hauptman

Pro: No longer living in the Freak Zone / Con: No longer near the pack, aka no longer able to keep tabs on my dad & Mercy & their crazy adventures

Pro: Fresh new start where NO ONE KNOWS who my dad is / Con: No one knows who my dad is. How do I explain my life to strangers?

Pro: B.U. is a good school. Will learn things. / Con: Super expensive out-of-state school, no idea what I want to learn

Pro: Boston full of history, new place far from everything I've ever known / Con: New place far away from everything I've ever known

Pro: Tad is there. / Con: Literally only reason I want to go is Tad. Do I really want to be THAT GIRL?

I had lots of time to think on the plane ride to Boston. Maybe too much time.

At first, I tried to distract myself by watching a movie. But once the movie was over, I realized I still had half a flight left to kill, and for some stupid reason, my brain refused to focus on a second movie, so I just sat there with my headphones in, listening to music, and watched the little airplane on the flight tracker creep slowly over the continent.

I was going to see Tad in two hours. The countdown was in actual hours now, as opposed to days, or weeks - or a month and five days, which was what the count had been the day Tad left for school.

Not that I was keeping an official countdown or anything.

The last few weeks had been a strange new experience, filled with texts and memes and FaceTime and thirty-second phone calls from Tad literally just to say good night. It was sweet and wonderful and also kind of terrible. I hadn't realized how much I'd gotten used to having Tad around until he was gone. Somehow, in the short time he'd been back in the Tri-Cities, I'd managed to let him into a big enough part of my life that when he left, there was a void that couldn't be filled by anything else. Not even by communicating with Tad.

Because he'd been right: the worst part was just not being able to be with him. Even with a bazillion different forms of instant communication at my fingertips, I still found myself missing him. Actual him, not just his voice or his words or his face. I'd thought FaceTime would help with that, but somehow, seeing him without being able to reach out and touch him made me miss him even more.

I was tired of seeing Tad through a little tiny screen. I wanted to see all of him. In person. No substitutes accepted.

Ninety minutes til landing...

But here was the weird thing.

As hard as it had been to go long-distance when our relationship was so new, I was pretty sure the timing was actually a blessing in disguise. Because if Tad hadn't announced he was going back to Harvard so soon, it would never have occurred to me to apply to schools in Boston. Which meant, come fall, we would have had no choice but to go our separate ways.

And if being apart was this hard now, I couldn't imagine how much harder it would have been if Tad had stayed home the whole summer before going back to Harvard. Then we would have had to go our separate ways after being actually, physically together for months instead of weeks. It was awful just thinking about it.

Which meant that maybe the idea of me moving to Boston for school...wasn't the worst idea ever?

Sixty minutes to landing...

But, okay. Say moving to Boston wasn't the worst idea ever.

I was still pretty sure I wasn't the kind of girl who'd be happy following someone else around the rest of my life. And I definitely wasn't the kind of girl who went charging into a situation without a plan. That was more Mercy's M.O., not mine. I was much more like my dad, in the sense that I'd prefer to analyze the situation from a thousand different angles before making a single move.

But when I'd applied to schools in Boston? There had been no forethought whatsoever. I'd gotten home from that date with Tad, plonked myself in front of the computer, and filled out those applications in one feverish burst.

Sometimes I felt like everything with Tad had been one feverish burst, from the time I'd picked up those scissors to give him a haircut until now.

Because no matter how many times I analyzed it, no matter how rational I attempted to be about it, this entire situation was not rational. Not even a little bit.

Thirty minutes to landing...

However... maybe I was just freaking out because, on the whole, the irrational things in my life were things like bridge troll attacks, or a bunch of parents deciding I was dangerous because my dad is a werewolf, or my dad deciding to adopt a two-thousand-year old pyromaniac as my foster brother.

But this was different. What I felt for Tad was just as unexpected as all the other things that happened in my life. But having him in my life was something I actually got to choose. And it was, without a doubt, something that made me happy.

Even if the way I felt about Tad sometimes flared into something so strong it scared me a little.

Fifteen minutes to landing...

But it was the good kind of scared. Because while the things I felt for Tad might have been unnerving, they weren't nearly as terrifying as, say, being kidnapped from your own bedroom.

So what was my hesitation all about?

I guess I was trying to figure out whether I was an idiot for wanting to chase my feelings all the way across the country when I had no guarantee that it would last.

I'm not a cynic. But I knew from watching my parent's marriage fall apart that the honeymoon period ends. Sometimes disastrously.

I just hoped seeing Tad again would give me a chance to figure out what was waiting for us on the other side of our honeymoon period.

You know... Assuming I could get my emotions to calm down long enough for me to think.

When we landed, I sent Tad a text consisting almost entirely of emojis, and he sent back a gif of the Boston Red Sox winning the World Series to express his excitement. Which left me feeling slightly giddy and stupid as we headed through the airport to the car rental counter.

A convenient side effect of Dad being an Alpha werewolf was that everyone - including people who had no idea he was a werewolf - tended to respond to his air of authority with unusual efficiency, so I was anticipating a pretty speedy check-in process. Which was great, because I was impatient to get to the hotel and change out of my travel clothes. I had a cute outfit all picked out for dinner tonight, and after seven hours of traveling I was ready for a quick shower and a make-up refresh so that I looked as good as possible when I finally saw -

"Tad?" Mercy said.

I jerked my head around, following Mercy's line of sight, and stopped in my tracks. There was a definite Tad-like apparition standing by the rental car counter, bouncing on the balls of his feet as he scanned the crowd. It wasn't until his eyes locked with mine and his face burst into a smile that my brain processed it was actually Tad and not a figment of my imagination.

Or maybe my feet processed the truth first, because I'd abandoned my suitcase and was halfway to him before I realized I was even moving. And then Tad's arms were around me and he was squeezing me so tight that I let out an involuntary squeal (okay, possibly it was a little voluntary) as he lifted me briefly off the ground. When he put me down, he planted a kiss on my lips that momentarily made me forget we were in the airport, surrounded by the watchful eyes of total strangers and also my parents.

My awareness came rushing back as soon as Tad released me, and my cheeks went bright red as Tad turned to say hello to my dad and Mercy.

Hormones: 1
Jesse: 0

"What are you doing here?" I asked when Tad turned back to me. "I told you you didn't need to come meet us."

"Couldn't wait," he said. He grabbed my suitcase with one hand and snaked his other arm around me, stealing another kiss while my dad and Mercy went to the counter to sort out the rental car situation. The look on my face when he pulled away was probably sappy and completely idiotic, but I didn't care.

Because I was actually here! I was with Tad! And I might have the chance to be with him in Boston for the next several years!

I mean. You know. If I decided that's what I really wanted.

We headed to the hotel, where my dad had booked a suite. There were two bedrooms, one on each side of the living/dining room area, and I ducked into mine to change and freshen up. When I came back out, everyone had settled onto the couches in the living room. Tad and Mercy were deep into a conversation about the rebuild of Mercy's garage (aka Zee's old garage), and my dad was busy frowning at something on his phone. Tad looked up as I made my way toward the couch, and to my immense satisfaction, he did a double-take. I was wearing a new, off-the-shoulder top, with flowy sleeves that gave it a boho feel, along with my favorite pair of jeans and some actual make-up.

But the biggest change was my hair, which I'd taken down from its messy bun and brushed until it looked respectable again. The last time Tad had seen it, it had still been half-gold, half red. Right before our trip, I'd chopped off the bottom half, leaving me with chin-length gold hair, to which I'd added blue and purple highlights.

"Hey," Tad said, as I plopped down next to him on the couch. He reached over and tugged on a lock of my hair. "Your hair's weird."

"I think the word you are looking for is 'awesome,'" I said.

"Nope. Definitely weird."

I made a face at him. He made a face at me right back, and somehow that made me wish my dad and Mercy would disappear so I could climb into his lap and make out with him.

I sat down next to him and tried to pretend like I was paying attention to the conversation. In truth, I was completely distracted by the fact that Tad had draped his arm along the back of the couch and kept reaching over to fiddle with my hair. Occasionally, his fingers brushed the back of my neck, which sent a rush of tingles up and down my spine. By the time we went to dinner, I felt like a walking ball of hormones.

Luckily, Boston itself was a good distraction. The city was chock-full of famous landmarks and built around old, windy streets that Tad claimed made it impossible to get anywhere without having to drive through basically the entire city to get there. On foot, that was less of a problem; it didn't take us long to cut a path from the hotel over to the North End, where Tad had made reservations at one of approximately two zillion Italian restaurants crammed into a three-block radius.

There was something cozy and homey about the North End, with its delicious-smelling food joints lined up one right after another. Everywhere, there were strings of fairy lights and groups of people eating and drinking and laughing. We passed a shop called Mike's Pastry that had a line of people stretching out the door and halfway up the block. Tad made a point to warn me that I should save room for dessert because we were definitely heading there for cannolis later. But that didn't stop me from stuffing my face with fresh, piping-hot bread at the restaurant while I waited for my giant bowl of pasta to arrive.

Over dinner, talk turned to logistics, and we ran through the schedule for the weekend. I had an official visit scheduled for early tomorrow afternoon at Boston University. Then, after Tad finished his classes for the day, we were going to head over to Harvard so he could show us around. All of that was, in practical terms, the reason for our visit. But what really mattered - and what made me the most nervous - was the visit tomorrow morning.

My dad and Mercy had a meeting with the local Alpha, which my dad had forbidden me to attend.

"Why?" I'd demanded, when I'd first learned about it. "The meeting's about me, isn't it? I should be able to attend and represent myself. Also, I think I should know what some of the local pack looks like. Because unlike some people, I don't have a magic nose that can identify all supernatural creatures within smelling distance."

"I'm not letting you near strange werewolves, Jesse. Especially ones I have no authority over," my dad had said. And then he'd given me one of his scary Alpha-werewolf looks, which didn't scare me in the least, but let me know I wasn't going to win the argument, no matter what I tried.

It was frustrating, but I guess my dad had a point. He had no say in the pack here. No control over how any of the wolves would treat me. This was the part about me potentially moving to Boston that probably bothered my dad the most. At least if I'd gone to school somewhere in Washington, the pack could have kept a distant eye on me. But here - on top of it being thousands of miles away - my dad's pack couldn't interfere without it becoming a turf war.

I think if my dad had had his way, he would've kept it a secret that I was going to be in Boston. It definitely would've been safest for me not to be on any supernatural creature's radar at all.

But since my dad was now pretty much the most famous werewolf of all time, he couldn't exactly waltz into someone else's city unannounced. Ergo - negotiations for my safety.

As usual, I just wished there was something - anything - I could do on my own behalf. But since there wasn't, I would just have to sit and wait. You'd think I'd be an expert at waiting by now, but patience has never been one of my finer qualities. Oh, well. At least my dad and Mercy wouldn't be in moral peril this time.

You know. Probably.

When we'd finished dinner, Mercy announced that she and my dad were skipping cannolis and heading back to the hotel. "But you two go ahead and get dessert," she said.

She didn't have to tell me twice.

"I'll see you at midnight!" I said. I grabbed Tad's hand and practically yanked him down the street as I waved good-bye to my dad and Mercy.

Tad laughed as I hauled him away. "Excited for cannolis?"

"Yep. That's it. Definitely the cannolis," I said. But my mind was filled with other thoughts entirely.

The hormones must have come through loud and clear, because all it took was one glance, and the amusement in Tad's expression vanished. I saw him swallow hard before he said, "Come on." He tugged me around a corner, into an alley between two red-brick apartment buildings. There were a few small balconies jutting out over the fire escape, all of which appeared to be competing for "most picturesque potted plant formation on a balcony" award. As far as alleys go, it was a nice one. But I only had about two seconds to take it all in before Tad yanked me in for a kiss.

I let myself sink into him, kissing him back with all the things I'd felt the last few weeks but hadn't been able to show. The missing and the wanting and every other confusing thing I felt for him that I didn't want to name. When we finally came up for air, Tad buried his face in my neck, his breath shuddering against my skin. Shivers went all the way through me.

"I missed you, Jesse," he murmured. "I can't wait until you move out here for good."

I suddenly realized I hadn't mentioned to Tad that I was still on the fence about moving to Boston. Somehow, this didn't seem like the time.

But Tad noticed me tensing up and lifted his head, looking at me in concern. "What's wrong?"

"I, um - I'm just worried about tomorrow morning," I blurted out, because at least that was true. "You know, the meeting with the local Alpha. What if it all goes wrong and Dad forbids me to move and..."

Tad's gaze softened. "Don't worry about that, Jesse. Your dad wouldn't have come all the way out here if there wasn't a way to make this work."

"I just feel like I'm putting him through a lot with all of this. He already worries enough, and now he has to find a way to keep me safe without his pack to look out for me, and -"

"I'll be looking out for you," Tad said. "I'm not going to let anything happen to you, Jesse."

I nodded, even though we both knew he couldn't really make that promise. Even if I did end up in Boston, we'd be going to schools across the city from one another. And if some supernatural creature found out I was here and decided to go after me, there was nothing to stop them from snatching me before Tad had a chance to -

"Hey," Tad said, reading my expression. "I mean it. If you need me, I'll come for you. No matter what."

"I know," I said quietly. I also knew that Tad's extraordinary ability to keep me safe was the only reason my dad was entertaining the idea of letting me go to college so far away. But I couldn't help wishing, in some deep part of me, that it was all actually true. That I would be safe, just because Tad said so.

"Come here," he said.

I leaned into him as he wrapped his arms around me, and did my best to let his embrace drive away all my memories of kidnappers, fae attacks, and the nail bat behind my bed that I was determined to smuggle into my dorm room. Tad might not be an Alpha, but there was still something steady and reassuring about him.

And on top of all that... I'd really missed this. Just being here with Tad. Being able to touch him. Smell that amazing, indefinable Tad smell, which was some combination of aftershave and natural guy musk and something faintly metallic, like the scent you'd get from a handful of coins. Which maybe doesn't sound that appealing, but for me it was intoxicating.

Ugh. Okay. Fine. Who was I kidding?

I wanted him. I wanted us. I... I was pretty sure I wanted to move to Boston.

Before I had a chance to internally freak out about this, Tad pressed a kiss to the top of my head and said, "Come on, let's get cannolis."

We held hands while we stood in line outside Mike's Pastry. Maybe it was the smell of sugar wafting out of the shop, or maybe it was the heady aftereffects of being wrapped up in Tad, but whatever the case, I felt happy and relaxed by the time we actually got our dessert. I took a huge bite of my chocolate chip cannoli as we left the tiny shop. My mouth was stuffed so full, and I was so distracted by the deliciousness, that I nearly collided with a girl in the middle of the sidewalk.

"Oofs...Fforry!" I managed.

But the girl barely even noticed me. Instead, she'd halted right where she was and said, "Tad?"

Next to me, Tad froze.

Okay, so that wasn't a great sign. I stopped and took in Sidewalk Girl's appearance. She was pretty and curvy, with long dark hair and a cat-ate-the-canary expression on her face that I did not like at all. "I didn't know you were back in Boston," she said, and Tad's grip on my hand tightened - so much that I let out a noise of protest around my mouthful of cannoli.

"It's really none of your business what I do, Morgan," he said.

Morgan's gaze darted down to our intertwined hands, her expression hardening. "So is this where you've been all this time? Cradle robbing girls who don't know any better?"

"Wow," I said, having finally swallowed my giant mouthful of dessert. "Great intro. My name's Jesse, by the way. Not that you seem to care."

"Whoa there, honey," Morgan said, flipping her hair over her shoulder. "I'm not trying to be rude. I was just surprised to see Tad back in Boston, that's all. I thought he'd left for good."

"My name is Jesse," I said. "Not honey. And I don't know why you think Tad's life is any of your business anymore, but he clearly doesn't want to talk to you, so we're gonna go now."

"I'm trying to do you a favor," Morgan snapped. "You should be glad you ran into me. Do you even know what he is?"

"He's my boyfriend," I said flatly. "I think that about covers it."

Morgan let out a sharp laugh. "He fools people, you know. Looking all normal.But underneath, he's just as creepy as all those freaks in that tourist trap out in Washington. If you really knew what he was-"

Morgan kept talking, but I was no longer listening. A strange roaring had sprung up in my ears, tuning out everything she said after the word freak. It probably sounds hypocritical of me, considering I call the neutral zone in the Tri-Cities the Freak Zone on a regular basis. But when I said freak, it was with a sort of familial affection. After all, most people thought my dad and the pack were pretty freaky, too.

But Morgan meant it as a slur. And that was unacceptable.

So before I had a chance to think about what I was doing, I'd taken my cannoli and smashed it against Morgan's face.

"Wait wait wait. You attacked Tad's ex-girlfriend? With a cannoli?"

"Attacked is a strong word," I said. "More like...did some interpretive food art on her face."

Izzy dissolved into gleeful cackling on the other end of the phone. "You are the best person ever. Like, literally the best."

"I'm not sure Morgan would agree with that sentiment." I swung my feet up and propped them against the headboard of my hotel bed. It was morning, and my dad and Mercy were off at their secret meeting with the local Alpha, which meant that I could speak freely for once without fear of being overheard.

"Pffbt. She totally deserved it."

"Well. The look on her face was pretty satisfying," I admitted.

"Obviously. So how did Tad take the whole thing? Clearly he wasn't pleased to see his ex."

"That's a great question, actually. I kinda didn't get a chance to talk to him about it."

"What do you mean?"

"Tad got us an Uber back to the hotel right after the Morgan incident. And the hotel was only like two minutes away, so I didn't have time to ask him about anything before he dropped me off. I would've called him, but, you know...superhearing."

"Ugh," Izzy said. "But you're seeing him later?"

"After he's done with class, and after I'm done taking my tour of B.U..."

"It'll be here before you know it," Izzy said sympathetically. "In the meantime, we can always obsess about Morgan."

"Which part about Morgan?"

"The part where she's seen Tad in his birthday suit."

"Izzy!"

"What? You said she had that whole line about 'underneath, he's just as creepy as all those freaks out in Washington.' Don't you think that translates to her seeing him without his glamour on."

"Oh. You meant that birthday suit."

"Duh. Like I'd want to talk about Tad and his ex seeing each other naked."

"Izzy!"

"Sorry, sorry. Anyway...Tad with no glamour on. What do you think that means?"

I fidgeted uncomfortably. "I don't know. Maybe it doesn't mean anything. I hardly know anything about Morgan. And until I really don't know anything about what went on with her and Tad. I mean, I always knew Tad's love life out here was a little rocky, but..."

"You think Morgan tricked him into it? Spied on him or something?"

"I don't know. I'd rather not speculate until I can get the full story from Tad."

"Hmm," Izzy said. I could tell she had a lot more opinions to share, but she kept them to herself. "Well, just keep me posted. You know I'm always here if you wanna chat."

"Thanks, Iz." Just then, there was a knock on the door to the suite. "Coming!" I yelled, holding the phone away from my mouth for a second. "Gotta go, Iz, I think room service is here and an omelette's calling my name."

"Okay. Bye, chica. Don't forget to find out about the birthday suit!"

I hung up with Izzy and grabbed a hotel robe, wrapping myself up in terrycloth awesomeness to hide my no-bra, pajama-clad state. My stomach growled as I headed toward the door, and my mouth was already watering for eggs and hash browns as I pulled it open. But it wasn't room service breakfast I found waiting for me on the other side.

It was Tad.