Day 7 – Part 2

Alice's Threat

After Jasper had left and the soft rumble of his car was well beyond my ability to hear, I started to cry. But then I got pissed; hard and really fast and swore I'd exact some sort of modern-day revenge. But seeing as there weren't any statutes erected in his douche-ness to knock over, I did the next best thing.

I called Alice.

Maybe I had spent too much time away from her, or, more likely, I hadn't spent enough time getting to know the batshit craziness that was Alice, but she pulled the most bullshit move I could ever have expected.

I told her as much.

"I'm not that bad," she said. "And I'm pretty sure it's not kidnap if you're not fighting me the whole time."

I gave her a horrified look. "Yeah, you pretty much are. And brush up on your kidnapping laws, sweetheart. Can't beat around that scary, hairy bush."

She turned to me. "Hairy?"

I spread my legs and made a pointed gesture downward.

"Oh, for fuck's sake," she said, before turning into her driveway.

"So is like, revenge or something?" I said as we winded around the narrow driveway. "Because if so, it turns out I'm not very good at it."

"Revenge?"

"Yeah," I said, motioning towards the windshield. "For bailing on you guys after Jasper showed up in all his creepiness in Edward's bedroom."

She frowned. "Yes, well. I definitely haven't forgiven you for that. Now that I have to live the pathetic, mopey mess that was the previous Dr. Edward Cullen."

My stomach turned. "Um, yeah. About that. . . ."

After Alice had confessed her devious little kidnapping plan, I had pitched an incredible fit. Trying to open the door – which she had child-locked, naturally – and rolling down the window – which I had managed to sort of climb out of, but, to my ego's dismay, it turned out my hips were too wide - in an effort not to be driven to exactly where I was going.

"It's not revenge," she said. "It's payment."

"It sounds like blackmail. Or battery." I made my voice serious. "Alice, is your intent to threaten me with physical harm if I do not do whatever you tell me to do?"

"I am driving a one-ton vehicle in dangerous snow up a winding path right now," she said. "You tell me."

I sat back in my seat and crossed my arms. "Bitch."

"Fuckface."

I nodded. "I'll have to put that in my vulgar vocabulary arsenal. Well done."

When we finally reached the house, I refused to get out of the car.

"Edward's not here, Bella. He's on a business trip somewhere in the Midwest."

She was standing outside of her car, pressing her little face to the window until it was scrunched up and malformed against the glass.

I shook my head, staring out of the windshield.

"This window is fucking cold," she yelled. She pulled her face off it and rubbed it furiously for a second. "Get out of the car!"

"NO!" I yelled back.

"You're acting like a child!"

"Abso-fucking-lutely."

She paused for a moment and then tried a different approach. "I bought something for you. You have to come see it."

"You elfish little imp," I called through the glass. "I don't care if you bought me the pony I always wanted but never got from my asshole parents. I'm not getting out of the car."

"Fine," she yelled. "Then I'll have to go get it."

I was halfway through congratulating myself with some fist pumping, but when I uncrossed my arms I realized it had gotten cold in the few minutes the car had been shut off. I looked out the windshield in time to see Alice using her keys to get in through the front door. I groaned and slammed my head into the headrest.

Well, I suppose I may have deserved that, I thought wryly. Though better chances are that karma has finally decided to stop letting you do awful things to people and is wrecking havoc on your emotional tranquility.

Karma is the one wrecking havoc? If I have to get on karma's good side to control my panic, then I am fucked because there is no turning back from all the innocent souls I've corrupted.

I was still staring at the front door. It was open. I spent ten seconds flip-flopping between keeping my pride and getting some warmth before sighing and getting out of the car.

"Alice," I called in a singsong voice as I entered the house. "My dearest Alice. Wherest art thou hiding?"

I kicked off my shoes on the rug in the foyer and shut the door behind me. Immediately, I wished I hadn't. The house, for as little time as I'd spent in it, was heartbreakingly familiar. My stomach twisted a little.

Alice came bounding down the staircase with what was clearly a large garment bag flung over one of her shoulders. I balked and took a step back.

"Oh, fuck no," I said. "We talked about this, Alice! I'm not going to that fucking ball with Edward."

Ignoring me, she put the bag over one edge of the stairway.

I continued to yell. "One, Bella doesn't dance. Two, there is no effing way you're going to find me in anything that even resembles a dress. And three –"

She had unzipped the bag and took a step back from it to show me the contents. I stopped talking at once.

Black, fitting, some weird taffeta material I didn't know the name of, two thin straps over one shoulder and nothing over the other, floor-length, a weird but simple starburst of tiny sparkly gems that began on the left hip and spread outwards.

I closed my mouth.

"Exactly," she said. "And it cost almost a grand, so if you don't wear it I'm going to make you eat it instead." When I didn't say anything more, she smiled and crossed her arms. "The ball is tomorrow. Be prepared."

"Tomorrow?" I said. "But how the hell – that's too soon."

She screwed up her face into an exasperated expression. "Um, no, it's not. I did tell you about it a few days ago, saying it was in a few days. This is your fault. Suck it up."

I looked back at the dress and felt a yearning sort of tug on my chest. "What about Jasper?"

"You'll be there if I have to chloroform Jasper and lock him in his playroom to do it."

I felt my face drop. "But Edward," I hedged. "He doesn't think . . ."

"No," she said, her voice a little sharp. "He knows it's only business." She gave me a reproachful look. "Despite the fact that you fucked him an ran." I winced. "Him and his dad put on a fundraiser every year for kids and teens with type 1 diabetes. He took me last year, but I'm not keen on going again."

I couldn't keep my eyes off the dress. I'm pretty sure there was some sort of air conditioning vent over it or some mythical being that was enticing me to wear it, because it was fluttering and shimming and being beautiful all over the place.

"Oh?" I asked.

"Well," she said. "Actually, Edward's father banned me from going. I threw up on the chief of medicine last year. Kind of gross."

"Ew."

"Yeah."

I heard the muffle sounds of my phone trilling somewhere in the depths of my purse, signaling a text message. I sent Alice an amused look before digging through the contents of my purse to find it. But before I had extracted it completely from my purse's endless depths, Alice gave a small sigh.

I looked over at her as I retrieved the phone.

"What's up?" I asked. She was looking at the dress and smiling in a sad sort of way.

I flicked the phone open and stared at the LCD screen.

Tanya and I have arrived back at home. Please join us for supper.

I nodded slowly. "You know who it is."

She nodded and looked at the dress. I watched her eyes follow the seamless streams of billowing fabric in slow, languid flickers. Her eyes were black, which despite the resemblance to her hair, really didn't suit her.

Then she blinked and her eyes remained closed for longer than was strictly necessary for the purpose of whatever a blink does. When she opened them, they were on me.

"Please, Alice . . ." I started, my voice taking on a desperate edge. "Please, I need this. I need someone who won't use kid gloves on me. I need an asshole who can tell me to knock it the fuck off without worrying about hurting my feelings. I need someone to tell me "do this" or "don't do that." I have to get someone who can fix me. Edward . . . he's good. But he caters to me. Which is fine, I mean, hell yeah, you know? But if he's mollycoddling me, I'm not going to want to change. I need an asshole." I paused. "I need a Jasper."

"I know," she said. "I just wish it could be different." She brought her shoulders upward in a shrug, but her entire body seemed to collapse under the weight of them. "If you had met Edward before Jasper. Maybe Edward would have convinced you to see a doctor. You could be living with us, happy and secure, with a guy who loved you and a girl who wanted nothing more than to be your best friend. Whenever I saw you, I wouldn't have to see Jasper, too. Whenever you left, maybe Edward wouldn't be convinced it was the last time he'd ever see you. It could have been wonderful. Then, maybe we all could have been happy." She sighed. "Instead, we're all a little miserable, aren't we?"

"I'm sorry," I whispered. "I'm just – I need . . ." I stopped when her eyes went back to the dress. In a sort of blind panic, I shoved my feet back into my shoes and turned towards the front door.

"Before you go," Alice said, her voice tight, "let me call Jasper."

My hand was on the doorknob and it was with some effort that I uncurled my fingers from it. I nodded and pressed my forehead against the smooth wood, fighting a familiar bubbling of nausea.

"Jasper, hello, it's Alice . . . I'm fine, how are you? . . . Glad to hear it. I have a favor to ask you. Edward's ball is tomorrow and I just threatened Bella serious bodily harm if she didn't go but I wanted to be a good girl and check with you first to make sure it was okay." Her voice was surprisingly light and I turned to her, a grin on my face, before I saw her expression. Her eyes were closed and her face was tight with tension. She glanced at me and a slow smile began to form. "Yes, of course. It's at six o'clock tomorrow night . . . No, I already have a dress and shoes and all that. I'm keeping it all hostage tomorrow, so you'll have to bring her over beforehand . . . About four o'clock or so." Her face fell a little and the tips of her ears turned a sharp red. "No, I'll let you work that out with her."

She flipped her phone shut and shoved it in her pocket before grinning at me.

"Bella, my darling. It seems that you're going to be attending a ball."

I sighed. "Like a regular fucking Cinderella." I rubbed my forehead. "Alice – " I began, but she waved a dismissive hand in front of my face.

"Stop," she said. She leveled me with a fierce stare and I felt the hairs on the back of my neck salute in response. "I get it," she said with vehemence. "It's not going to be different. You and Jasper, me and Edward, it's all a little fucked up. I'm just going to have to cross my fingers and that you're able to get out before he makes it impossible for you to leave."

"Impossible . . ."

"Yeah," she said, picking up the dress and throwing it over her shoulder before climbing the stairs. "Impossible."