A/N: Friendly reminder I wrote this over 10 years ago. There's a reference to CDs in this chapter . . . and ringback tunes . . .

Day 10: Part 1

Jasper's Undoing

I woke with a start and when I was finally conscious enough to get my bearings, the first thing I heard was Jasper swear. I was sitting upright, which was a disconcerting enough way to wake up. But hearing Jasper utter The F Word was enough to convince me I had lost my mind entirely.

"Oh, Bella," he said, his voice sounding nasally. "It is quite impossible to watch you sleep if you insist on punching me as you do."

I turned to look at him and fought back a hysterical laugh. He was flat on the bed, his back arched slightly and he pressed the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger. Immediately my body seized, waiting for some sort of snarky, nasty retaliatory comment.

"Oh, damn, sorry," I hedged.

He sighed and wiggled his nose between his fingers. I felt another crazed laugh build in my throat.

Wait for it . . .

Staring as intently as I was at his face, I missed the moment his arm shot out, wrapped around my waist, and pulled me to him. Startled and already tense, I struggled immediately. It took only a moment for him to release me, startled himself, I was sure, but I was in his grasp long enough for my stomach to gasp out a slow, aching wave of nausea. My breath picked up immediately and I turned my face from him, feeling the heat of a deep blush begin to form across my face.

When I had calmed down and looked back at him, he looked as shocked as I'd expected. But there was also a wariness there, as though he was preparing himself for a fight.

"Um," I tried, but couldn't think of anything else to say.

Then he got a determined sort of look on his face and reached for me again. I had half-expected it and let him drag me across the bed and flip me on top of him. When I didn't struggle, he began to grin and despite my body's instinct to run, I smiled back.

"You took me by surprise," I said, leaning over to kiss his neck.

"I figured as much," he said, turning his head away from me in order to give me full access to his throat. I tenderly sucked on the skin there, relishing the salty taste of him.

Then, again without warning, he flipped us until he was on top of me.

He went to kiss me and I turned my head away. "Teeth brushing."

"Mmm," he said against my neck his voice still gravelly and thick from sleep. "You smell wonderful. Like strawberries, sex, and my bed."

I shivered as he licked my shoulder. "Well, that pretty much sums up yesterday."

He brushed a few strands of unruly hair that had fallen into my face, running his fingers through my hair and gently tugging at a few knots until they unraveled in his hands. The tug of his fingers felt incredible against my scalp and I moaned softly.

He stopped. "Did you just purr?"

I felt my face reddened. "Ah, perhaps."

He propped himself on his palms, pulling himself away far enough to see me properly. "God, Bella. You absolutely wreck me. Why did I wait so long?"

I counted off the days in my head. Ten? Ten days since we met and he was struggling to make sense out of waiting so long? My face, already red, burned hotter. This new Jasper . . . it was both intriguing and grossly discomforting. I was sure, at any moment, his characteristic assholishness would come out from this sweet, somber front. I imagined myself being shocked at the abrupt change and him laughing condescendingly at my naivety.

And then a deeper, more jaded part of me spent a long moment considering the fact that this change in him might be some sort of desperation at losing Tanya so unexpectedly. That he had realized that sarcastic, biting remarks and subtle emotional jabs had driven his sub away and he had made some sort of good boy vow to treat me better.

If that was the case, if he was being so sweet because he was terrified of losing me, then it was not the Jasper I wanted to give myself to. I thought vaguely of the contract I signed, and wondered briefly whether its breach could hold up in a court of law.

"Where are you?"

I refocused my gaze back to him. He had shifted his weight so he was resting on one elbow, the bottom half of his naked body still resting on mine.

"Nowhere good," I said.

He smiled. "Well, then, welcome back."

I curled myself into his chest, hiding my face from him, and he immediately wrapped his free arm around me to pull me closer.

I rubbed my cheek against the sparse spattering of hair on his chest, reveling in the feel of the coarseness on my face. I opened my eyes and though most of what I saw, hiding under his arm and pressed to his chest, was shrouded in darkness, I could see the small, light peak of his nipple. Without thinking, I stuck out my tongue and licked the delicate area. He shuddered and laughed, pulling away from me.

"Bella?" he asked. It wasn't a question, not really. More of a statement, an acknowledgement perhaps.

"Jasper."

His grin faded slightly before that same wicked smile that immediately set my chest on fire spread across his face. In an instant, he flipped me over onto my stomach and laid across me, pushing his erection into my back.

"Oh, Christ," I said, a wicked grin making quick work of my face as well. "I don't know if I can handle anymore of you."

"Give me a few minutes and I believe you will think otherwise."

I scoffed. "Challenge accepted."

"On your knees, please."

I brought my torso up slowly, relishing the feel of his silken sheets as they rubbed against my chest and already hardened nipples. I kept my head and chest on the bed, but stuck my ass oh so delicately in the air. Jasper growled somewhere deep in his chest and ran a soft hand across it.

I spread my legs, inviting his cock inside me, but instead I felt his torso sag over my body. He sighed deeply and I tensed under the weight.

"From the moment, Bella, you came into my den and spoke to me in your insolent and affected way, I knew I had to have you." He sighed again. "I will never share you and never let you go."

I smiled despite the vague insinuation that I had been an affected brat. This, this was the Jasper I knew. Still controlling and domineering in the exact way that Bella Swan needed and demanded.

So unlike Edward.

I buried my head in the sheets of his bed and groaned slightly, despite myself.

Jasper lifted himself from me and turned me back over gently.

"Bella," he began slowly, tentatively. "Bella, if the feeling is not reciprocated."

I clenched my jaw. Now there was insecurity? Trying with all my womanly might to successfully push Edward from my mind, I smiled. "No, I do," I said. "Very much. Now come here and kiss me."

He grinned and bent down towards me, placing a chaste kiss on my lips. The fire that was in my chest spread up and outward almost immediately. From nothing more than a vaguely affectionate gesture. I mean, he had kissed me the way any of my relatives did.

But I wanted more.

As he retreated, I followed him. Once he was too far for me to reach, I grabbed the back of his neck and pulled him down to me. With his mouth pressed against mine, I felt him smile again.

Smiling, always smiling. Always grinning.

Now, anyway.

I let go of the back of his neck and he rolled off me, pulling me with him as he did. I hooked one of my legs around his and buried my face into the crook of his arm.

"As it should be," he said.

I opened my mouth in an attempt to agree, but when nothing but a whoosh of air came out, I settled on nodding emphatically.

I was naked.

Naked. So very, very naked.

Standing in front of the mirror in the master bedroom with nothing but a thick collar around my throat.

Naked. A Jesus effing Christ sort of naked.

The kind of naked that makes you feel weird walking around your deserted apartment naked.

I groaned.

Being as it was the first official day that I had the privilege of being Jasper's brand-new sub, he insisted that I wear nothing. Apparently, it's what all his subs do. Which made me feel funny in the pit of my stomach. And I couldn't rationalize my way out of it and certainly couldn't argue my way out of it, because I was a sub. So, there I was. Naked.

I peered at the bedroom door, making sure it was securely shut and did a few jumping jacks. Aside from a small rippling on the edges of my thighs and my butt and the fact that my boobs hopped up and down with me, nothing else moved. Nothing I hadn't seen Tanya's body do, anyway. I nodded approvingly at my reflection.

A shot of static, like a bullet front a gun, actually made me screech. Jasper's crackling voice rippled from the speaker near the bed and for a brief moment of undiluted panic, I thought he had actually seen me do the naked jumping jack.

"Bella?"

I walked quickly, but not too quickly since I wasn't quite used to the way my boobs bounced without a bra on, and pressed the ubiquitous red button. "Yes?"

"I will be in my office for the next twenty minutes on an important phone call, not to be disturbed. I would greatly appreciate it if lunch could be made by the time I am finished."

"Lunch. Right. Got it."

He chuckled into the receiver before the crackling faded.

Yeah. He had definitely seen me.

I did a quite scout around the room, looking for a camera of some kind. When my search proved fruitless, I collapsed on the bed, falling backward, and spreading my arms out.

Okay, I thought, you can figure this out. Tanya said there weren't any cameras.

Right. But that doesn't mean anything. Maybe Jasper never told her.

Okay, that's a possibility, but if he didn't tell her, what are the chances of him telling you?

Not good. If you think there are cameras everywhere, you're going to go bat shit crazy.

Right. Better to suppress this.

Agreed.

I collected myself from the bed and opened the bedroom door, sticking my head out just enough to see down the length of the hallway.

Nothing.

I tiptoed out of the bedroom and made slow, but deliberate movements down the hallway and to the staircase.

Nothing.

I still had no fucking clue where Jasper's office was. I had found it on accident once and had been brought there a second time, but this place was like a fucking medieval castle and there was no way I had remembered where I'd been going. And, anyway, the last time I had tried my less-than-adequate ninja moves, Jasper had been watching me all along.

I collected myself, trying to breathe deeply like my mother had told me to do when I was fifteen, when I eventually would have children, and proceeded down the stairs and to the kitchen. I paused for a moment, with the fridge open, and contemplated what to make for lunch. It occurred to me, in a painful wave of frustration, that I had absolutely no idea what Jasper liked to eat. Tanya had always prepared lavish feasts of various foods and my stomach tightened as I remembered that I burned macaroni and cheese half the time.

Fuck.

Deciding that it would be better to make something simple and have him slightly disappointed than make something lavish and fuck it up, I decided on a submarine sandwich with some random, cooked vegetable.

The refrigerator did not disappoint and I was halfway through stirring the carrots when I decided some tunes were in order. A large, shiny CD player was perched on the wall beside the stove and I scanned the CDs for a moment before choosing the only one I knew.

Jackson Browne's soft, folksy voice permeated the kitchen and I was surprised, but not really, to see a variety of speakers atop the cupboards. The effect was quite nice and I picked up the stirring fork – or whatever it was, because I didn't know what to use and it was the biggest pronged thing I could find – and belted the lyrics into the unsuspecting utensil with little grace.

"Jimmy found his own sweet sound and won that free guitar."

Now properly convince Jasper was holed up in his office, I even allowed my ass a little shake. I spread my arms and shimmied forward, watching my breasts as they moved in tandem with my body.

Oh yeah. I could totally get used to this naked thing.

Though the music was so loud I couldn't have possibly heard it, from my periphery I saw the landline phone light up with a call. I turned the music off, and without looking at the screen, answered it.

"Whitlock residence."

"Hello, this is Chelsea, calling on behalf of Mr. Morgan of Morgan and Bloom. Is Mr. Whitlock available? Mr. Morgan would like to speak with him."

I looked around the kitchen for a notepad and some sort of writing utensil. Next to the phone's base, I saw a box the size of an envelope. "I'm sorry, he's not available right now. Can I take a message?"

I opened the box and inside was a pile of mail, some opened and others not. I rifled through them, seizing one that was already open, and grabbed the pencil lying next to it. I had just put the pencil to the paper, ready to take down Mr. Morgan's information, before I noticed a long, slender envelope still in the box with my name and Jasper's address on it. I hung up the phone without a second glance and delicately took the opened envelope from the box. The return address was surprisingly familiar.

I turned the envelope over and retrieved two items from inside. One was a plane ticket for Washington. The other, a letter.

Bella,

I've tried contacting you for quite a few days now, but your dumb ass lost and/or forgot to pay your cell phone bill, so it keeps going to voicemail. And you've got to change that stupid ring back tune. I want to shoot myself in the face whenever I hear it. Also, Tanya insisted you didn't want to talk to me. Which I didn't believe because, come now, it's me. I hate to send this to you at Fucktard Jasper's address, but I'm sure not even he could resist giving it to you. You know, felonies and all that.

Rosalie and I are moving to Washington to take care of her really sick mom. I've attached a pre-paid plane ticket voucher for you to use, whenever you want to see us. It's one way so make sure to use it wisely.

We took Jake with us. He and Jared have stopped trying to tear each other into bite-sized bits, and it'll probably be nice for Jared to have a canine companion. Or so Rosalie insists.

Don't worry about your apartment. Everything's been taken care of.

You always have a place to stay with us if you need it. For whatever reason.

Oh, and Edward has been trying to reach you, too. Says you haven't been calling him back. You should probably do that.

Love,

Emmett and Rosalie.

I read the letter twice. Then three times. Then I flipped over the envelope and saw the post office's stamp. It had been mailed four days ago. Which meant it had probably been here for a day or two. I shuffled the two items and brought the voucher forward. I looked at it without reading it.

Then the phone rang and I briefly considered not answering it before remembering that I had hung up on what was probably an important business call. With little attention to what I was doing, I picked up the phone.

"H-Hello?"

"Hello, this is Chelsea calling –"

I cut her off. When I spoke, I was surprised by the dead monotony of my voice. "Yes, yes. I'm sorry, my phone lost its signal or whatever."

"Of course," she said. "No problem at all. Please let me give you Mr. Morgan's contact information. It's quite an urgent matter and it's important that Mr. Whitlock return the call as quickly as possible."

"Right, of course," I said, but made no motion for the pencil on the counter. I couldn't let go of the voucher. The words on it began swimming dangerously in front of my eyes, but when I rubbed the back of my hand against them, I was surprised to see I was not crying. When I looked at the papers again, my vision was clear.

"Bella."

I raised my eyes slowly from the papers, already knowing what I'd see. Jasper was there, leaning against the doorframe between the kitchen and living room. Only his shoulder touched the dark wood and for a brief, ludicrous minute it seemed that it was the house that was resting against him. He was both bare-footed and bare-chested, wearing nothing but a pair of gray sweatpants, tied at the waist. For the first time, and though he had given me no previous indication of it, I was wary of the lines and curves of the muscles in his arms.

"Hello?" The voice on the phone was dim even though it pressed directly to my ear. "Hello? Are you still there?"

"Hang up the phone, Bella," he said in a voice so soft and gentle it was dangerous. I would have completely missed his words if I hadn't already been staring at the angry curl of his lips. I didn't have to look down at it to know that it was entirely covered in goose bumps. I could even feel the flesh raising. But I was frozen by terror and dread and was struggling to inhale properly. I closed my eyes and turned my face away from Jasper as he crossed the few remaining feet between us before unplugging the cradle from the wall.

The line went dead immediately and it was then, when I realized that I couldn't be saved from him, that I put the phone on the counter. It took a few more moments, but I when I was finally able to look up at him, I immediately look away again. Most of his face was calm, aside from the slight sneer on his lips, but his eyes . . . his eyes were so painfully angry, alive with a burning, wretched fire that I was sure if I looked at them any longer, I would turn to stone. He was angry. Angry that I had gone through his personal belongings, angry that I had found something he had been trying to keep from me. For a brief moment, I considered that perhaps he wanted me to find it. That keeping it available in a place I frequented might force me into finding it. But it was only a brief consideration as I attempted to meet his gaze again. There was nothing hesitant about his expression. He certainly had not wanted me to find this. He was angry.

But I was angrier.

"What the fuck," I spat, throwing the voucher to the ground. "What the fuck is that?"

His sneer didn't disappear but his eyes softened. "Excuse me?"

"How could you do that?" I cried, closing the remaining distance between us and smacking him, hard, against the chest. Though I would have preferred to kick him in the nuts, the smack did wipe the snarl off of his face. "How could you keep me from getting that letter?" I went to smack him again, but he caught my wrist. I brought the other hand up and smacked his shoulder. "How could you lie to them? To Emmett and Edward? How could you tell them I wanted nothing to do with them? They were all I had!"

"Bella – "

"No," I screamed. My head was rushing, I couldn't breathe, couldn't see. "Why would you do that? What reason could you possibly . . . possibly," I shook my head in an attempt to clear it. "Edward wanted to talk to me! Emmett did! I was already fucking here, why would you tell them that? The people I love."

"Edward isn't –"

"Shut up!" I cried. "Shut up and answer me."

He looked hesitant for a moment and let go of my wrists. "Edward isn't good for you." And then, as though gaining conviction, he said, "You are my sub. If I say so, you must obey, Bella. Those are the House Rules. You signed a contract. You know these things."

"You don't have control over me Jasper, you can't. . . . That isn't how this works. Total power exchange. It's not-but –"

"No buts, Bella," he said, taking a step back from me. "If you wish to stay in this house, you must follow the rules. You may leave at any time."

As Jasper gained his conviction, I lost a little of mine. I was suddenly exhausted and swayed for a moment on my feet before gripping the counter to maintain balance. But I was still angry. Fury and indignation and disgust rippled through my body in fast, aching waves. The exhaustion was impenetrable, but the anger was enough to keep me even.

I looked up at him. Even enough for this. To finish this. "But you didn't even tell me he called, why wouldn't you tell me he called?"

"Because I don't want you talk to him," he said, clenched his jaw and unfurling his lips from his teeth again. "And that is all that you need to know."

"You're a coward," I cried, slapping his chest again. "You're a fucking coward. Hiding things from me –"

"Stop hitting," he snarled, grabbing my wrist again. I brought his hand to mine and bit his knuckle. He hissed, but didn't let go. "You're making a fool of yourself, Bella."

I began to cry and tried to squirm my way out of his grip. "No, you are, you disgusting piece of shit. You pretend that I'm the most important thing to you but then you don't let me talk to my friends."

"What the fuck do you think this is?" he roared. He dropped my hands and spread his arms out, metaphorically encompassing our relationship, the house. "What do you think you're doing here? How could you possibly want to be a sub and at the same time insist on how things are fucking done here? It's not possible! You can't have both, Bella."

"Jasper –"

He snarled again. "See? That's what I'm talking about. How you still use my name. Why do you use my name? You rarely, if ever, call me Master. How is it that you insist on remaining as belligerent and catty as you did the moment you walked into this house? Why do you use my name? Why do you say it?" He lips were still curled over his teeth. In a quieter voice, but with a peaked level of intensity he said, "Why do you call me Jasper?"

I opened my mouth and closed it again.

"Why do you refuse to call me Master?"

"I – I do. I do call you Master. I just knew you as – as Jasper before that."

He cried out a frustrated, angry sound. "You have been begging me for it," he said. "You have been begging to be my sub. I saw it. I saw it everywhere. I saw it before you even knew it was what you wanted. The way you looked at me, form the corner of your eyes when you thought I wasn't looking. How you played with your hair, relentlessly, when I was in sight of you, but never did it when you were alone. How you smiled at me. Bella, I saw it everywhere. I wasn't looking for a new sub. Tanya was just fine."

He laughed once, bitterly, and looked at the ground.

"You should have stayed away, Bella," he continued and something low and menacing crept into his tone. "Should have listened to all of your friends and stayed away from me. I told you as much myself. I warned you. I panicked the first time you went to Edward's, sure that either he or Alice had convinced you never to return. And all I could think about was the first time I saw you. You were so insolent, such a child. Defiling Emmett's and Rosalie's home like you did. Ignoring their reproach. And I had to have you." He brought his hands out and cupped them together, formed them around an invisible ball of clay. "Had to break you down and build you back up into the person, the sub, I wanted you to be. The best challenge, my ultimate challenge. Emmett talked about you for years, and I always listened politely, not really caring. But then you were there, so horribly radiant in your awfulness. And I had to have you. I needed you."

"What?" I breathed.

"All those people I encounter, all those who come around me, they bend to my will. They bend willingly. But here you are, doing your insolent thing. Oh, Jesus." He brought his hands to his head and smoothed his hair down aggressively. He was looking at me, but his eyes were unfocused. "And you wouldn't bend. I tried. I degraded you, hated you, made you feel like a stick of fucking furniture, and you never caved. You cried; I heard you cry. You cried a lot at night, in your sleep. And I tried to console you the best I could, but that's just not something I have in me." He finally looked up at me and I was both disgusted and horrified to see his eyes were wet. "Everything I do has a purpose," he said slowly, "and I'm not patient. They say I'm patient, and I'm not. I'm just tolerant. But I couldn't tolerate you."

"Jasper," I breathed.

"My name," he moaned, pulling his hair tightly at the base. "When you say my name it drives me absolutely crazy. Everything about you drives me wild. I crave you, Bella. From the moment I saw you, all awkward and uncomfortable. God, Emmett's-I never knew . . . never knew the extent of it. I was so annoyed we had to arrive early so Tanya could talk to you. Annoyed that, though I did really like Emmett, I had to make pointless conversation with him and his bitchy sub." He looked wildly across my face before seeming to jump thoughts. "And when you left, every time you left, I felt broken. And when you came back, I picked myself up again. Tanya begged for you to come back, in her sleep, because she saw the effect it had on me. I couldn't sleep, couldn't focus on work, wondering if I'd ever see you again. Every morning she'd wake up and check your room to see if you were there. And when you weren't, she was afraid. Afraid of the sorrow. Afraid of the weariness, the lack of sleep, the lack of food I ate. She saw what you were doing to me. Saw that you were destroying me simply by your absence."

"But you were so cold," I whispered, not knowing what else to say. "So distant. You were such an asshole."

His eyes flashed for a brief moment and in that moment, I swore I saw something of the old Jasper there. Some raw and primal and angry.

"I had to be, Bella. Every smirk, every berating comment. I had to be an asshole." Now he looked imploringly at me. "Because I couldn't have you."

"But Alice and Edward –"

"They spoke truths, Bella. Whatever nasty thing they said about me to you, it was the truth. Why do you think, now that I have you, I've been turning away their calls? Refusing to give you that-that letter?" He gestured at Emmett's discarded mail on the ground. "Refusing to let you talk to Edward. Turning him away from seeing you. Hurting him. I wanted to make sure he wouldn't come back. Wouldn't be able to change your mind. Wouldn't say that one, perfect thing that would make you realize that I really was no good for you." He groaned. "I watched you every night as you slept. Every single night. You caught me a few times, but every night I came. You are so beautiful. You would say my name every night."

I couldn't think. I wanted, so badly, to turn my face away so I didn't have to look at him. So I didn't have to see the enraged mania that was making his face flushed and his eyes wet. But I couldn't; because I needed to drink this in. Soak up as much as I could.

"Jasper –"

"Stop saying my name! You are wrecking me, Bella."

He took a step towards me, and to my astounded surprise, I didn't take a corresponding step back. Instead of feeling wary, I felt incredulous.

"And so you tried to break me," I said. "Down to my absolute essentials, until I was nothing more than pliable human flesh in your hands. And then you tried to build me up, make me better, fix me."

His eyes brightened. "Yes, exactly!"

"While all the while knowing that I'd never feel whole again without you."

For a moment he didn't do anything. Then he narrowed his eyes. "Edward has said too much."

I felt calm. "Truths. All truths."

His opened his mouth but then shut it was an audible crack.

"Feels weird, doesn't it?" I asked, though it wasn't really a question. "To not be in control. Do you even know how to handle yourself right now?"

I had stopped crying but there was a new sort of sadness in my chest. Sadness and a tight pressure, letting me know this would soon have to end because that fickle, dangerous black tar hold on my body would force me into unconsciousness.

But I had to do this. Had to finish this.

Then he pounced on me, taking my face between his hands, and kissed me in that furious, particular way that set my body on fire. I kissed him back with as much fervor as I could manage. Our lips parted at the same time and I wound my tongue around his, tasting his salty sweetness. As I had with Edward, I focused on the brilliant taste of him, imprinting it to memory so, whenever I thought of him, if I decided I was finished, I would never forget it.

He pulled away looked intently at me. Then he kissed my forehead, my cheeks, and my nose. He bent over and kiss my chin and the soft skin of my throat, the tops of my breasts and, getting down on his knees, my stomach, the edges of my hips, and my thighs. He rested his head against my stomach, gripping the backs of my calves between his soft hands, and made a noise. The sound was more of a low moan, the same sound that a deep wind instrument might make, than anything human. I found myself paralyzed. I turned my head from him.

With help from the kitchen lights, Jasper's stainless steel refrigerator glared back at us, causing our reflections to be morphed and distorted.

But still I saw us.

He looked like I thought he would; shoulders slumped, the long arc of his back more pronounced, his hands looking huge against my calves. But my posture surprised me. I was strangely erect and my head was tilted, back and away from Jasper and towards the refrigerator. But it was my hands which I'd thought were still lying limply at my sides, that were the most damning. They were out and forward, their palms extended over Jasper's head and for a moment I thought it looked like I was blessing him. But when I actually looked down at them, I realized that they were defensive. Like they were warding off some invisible attacker. And when I separated them, the top of Jasper's head was the first thing I saw.

My hands could not have been more clear.

"Bella," he said softly. He took his cheek from my stomach and looked up at me. "You have been my undoing."

He didn't like what he had turned in to.

And neither did I.

I needed to think.

"I don't want this," I choked out. "I need to go."

My head was light and dizzy as I stepped away from him. The black tar had already consumed my chest and it was only a matter of minutes before it would consume me entirely.

I fumbled at the coat rack by the garage door. I couldn't see what I was grabbing, only vaguely away of my nakedness. When my trembling fingers finally grasped something, I almost laughed. It was a floor-length trench coat, clearly Jasper's. I slipped on the moccasins I left at the garage door to use whenever I smoked. They were still damp from my last excursion to Edward's and instead of putting them on delicately, I slipped my toes inside before pressing my heel down, bending the back of the shoe inward. I knew they would be ruined.

I grabbed Jasper's keys from their bowl on the counter. I opened the door and it was only then that I looked at him. He was still on his knees, the frame of his body resting on his heels. He was slumped over, his head bowed, just as clearly unable to watch me leave as I was unable to stay.

I stepped over the threshold and into the garage. I closed the door behind me and bolted for his car.

I had just made it up the porch steps to Edward's house before the blackness overtook me.