Chapter 10:
The airship carrying the King of Ooo landed in a pouring rain at the Candy Kingdom's airfield. It was a fitting day for the mood of the person waiting there. Drusilla Princess-Mertens was in a brittle, edgy mood. Not a word got said as they waited for the airship's engines to spool down. The tall woman was in motion the minute it was safe. The staff fell in at her heels as the rear ramp slowly cranked open.
Drew was already climbing the ramp before the structure had touched down. She found Emeraude, Breakfast, and Toast waiting there at the back of the cargo-bay with Finn. The big man was laying out on a stretcher, carried by two Grid-Face People. As soon as the ramp was down, they began walking down the ramp, bringing their charge into the light. He looked ashen to Dr. Chips. His face was ghostly pale. The tiny wrinkles that had begun to spring up in the last few years looked almost like canyons to nurse Poundcake. Saying not a word, their leader got to work, checking the Hero-King's pulse and heart rate, before announcing, "let's get him into the ambulance."
In the palace, the Inner Council was already hard at work. A blear-eyed Billy sat before the princesses, getting grilled on what he was going to say to the Privy Council later in the day. It wasn't going to be long at all before the various princesses were in town and shrill over the current situation, and Billy was going to be facing them down as the face of Finn's government. That was Cherry's idea. Bonnie had gone into a towering rage when pretty much every member of the Inner Council backed her rival. It was a bit of an insult. She, who'd put together the whole Privy Council, wasn't to be trusted managing it. It stung almost as much as when Finn had been chosen to lead the world instead of her.
Naturally, Bonnie had managed to make his last few hours a living hell. She'd been riding him about just what he was going to say and how he was going to say it. She wanted him on message and on script too. He was the son of a man who was notorious for saying whatever came to his mind, but Bonnie was determined to make sure he didn't think he had the same dispensation. Billy, worried as he was about his father, his sister, and his brother-in-law, was keyed up and doing his best not to blow up in her face.
Rags was doing little better. She'd been up just as long as her husband. More to the point, she'd had to leave their kids with Abeiuwa in the Grey Forest, and she was worried about them. Seeing both the Froyo Princess and her hubby looking as though they were going to wilt, Cherry interrupted the proceedings, announcing, "if you want him to perform, Bonnie, you might try letting him sleep. They've been here most of the night. We all need to get some rest, or we're going to blow this." When the candy-monarch shot to her feet to start shouting, Cherry went hard at her, reminding her, "you almost unleashed an unstoppable monster on the world because you didn't sleep, Bonnie, or have you forgotten that."
Bonnie flushed to her hair and glanced away. Finn hadn't been shy about reminding her that she'd nearly unleashed Goliad on an unsuspecting world. It was his patented, 'you're not as smart as you think' insult. He'd used it frequently to cut her down to size, not least because it was so very effective. Part of her wanted to shout back at Cherry, but she knew the younger woman was right. "Ok," she said. "We'll meet up again at noon. We'll have lunch just before we go into the council meeting."
Elsewhere, Chelsea the Wax Hustler wiped her nails of the blood of one of her former mercenaries. Her face was flushed from rage. They'd had him! They'd had him where they could have killed him! And these fools had failed to close the deal! The news had driven the evil harridan berserk. She'd killed two of the men before Fedir could drag her off of them. He'd barely escaped getting clawed himself.
It was another ugly event that damaged the morale of the few men she had left. They'd done just as she'd asked. They'd focused on doing just what she'd told them to do. They'd raided the auction and brought her the precious books she'd asked them to retrieve. The whole thing had gone off with barely a hitch. Their reward? Cold murder because they'd not bothered to stop to murder a man they didn't recognize or even expect to see.
"I'm sorry," she muttered. He wasn't entirely sure who that was addressed to. "I hate him," the evil witch growled! "I hate them both." "This will not help you," Fedir burbled. He was taking the diplomatic tack, even though he was going to be stuck cleaning up this mess and disposing of the bodies. He had a slice in the sleeve of his jacket from her nails just now. She hadn't managed to cut through the material, but it was a warning of the danger he was in and a reminder of why his predecessor had always worn jackets, even when it was warm outside.
"I can get the books on a boat, bound for the east end of the inner sea," he said. "They'll go through the pillars and along the southern coast to land in the Emerald Kingdom. Your partner can get them there." Chelsea nodded, her face expressing just how distracted she was. Moving on, he said, "business has been slow with our new recruits." The evil woman looked up at him then. "Things have picked up in the last week," said Fedir, "but we're behind. There was a bottleneck. The sot your friend sent us to help us get our agents through the border was lazy." That immediately had her attention. She wasn't going to be able to raid the wedding if she didn't get men through the border! "But it's getting better," she rumbled.
Fedir did his best not to show fear as he softly said, "we're behind, Lady. There's two-hundred who've gotten through, but the rest are bottled up outside." Striding towards him, Chelsea said, "who's our problem? What's holding things up?" "The Ice-Prince refused to simply let your friend's agent bring in our men without papers," said Fedir. It was risky referring to any of the Mertens clan, even obliquely. It was a strange blindspot with this woman.
Stopping before him, Chelsea reached out and began fiddling with his tie, as she purred, "but you got two-hundred through..." "Your friend's daughter signed for them," he said. Frowning–she didn't really like or trust Bronwyn–the Wax-Hustler burbled, "but she didn't sign for the rest..." "She went home, Lady," said Fedir. She was much too close. She could get him in the face or maybe knife him in the leg with the concealed dagger in her shoe. Calmly, voice shaking only a little, Fedir laid out just what was going on with Mr. Barry Baines. As she buttoned up his jacket, the evil beauty said, "punish Mr. Baines. Make it clear to him what the price of failure is." "How much do you wish to punish him," Fedir burbled? "Punish him dead," said Chelsea, as she turned away.
As the clock-tower tolled the hour at one in the afternoon in the Candy Kingdom, the members of the Princess Privy Council filed through the door, a chastened and nervous Cerilia amongst their number. There were a number of people from the bandit kingdoms now welcomed to the Council, though they had not yet earned the right to vote. As the gathering took their places, Billy the Hero came striding into the chamber from Bonnie's ante-chamber. Taking his place before the throne his father had won, the big man waited, as the gathered princesses found their seats.
He could feel their eyes on him. He could almost hear the questions. Why was he here? Who had summoned them? What was going on? The whole experience left him cold, even terrified. He could wreck this whole thing. His father had managed to hammer the mess the Lich left together into something resembling a whole kingdom once more. He'd practically killed himself doing it, and Billy felt more than a little inadequate to carry the whole thing on his shoulders. He wasn't his father, and he knew it. At the same time, knowing that Drew had pronounced that Finn would recover, he was a lot more comfortable. He was warming the seat, and that was all. Knowing his dad would be back at work–probably soon after waking up–he was a lot more comfortable with this.
"Good afternoon, everyone," said Billy, as he did his best not to fidget. The brand new suit he was wearing was doing nothing to help, as he kept on wanting to scratch at his neck or tug at the sleeves, which seemed to be binding him up around his armpits. He could scarcely understand how the big, blue dufus, who'd worn a tee-shirt and jeans all his life, could be comfortable in this. Billy had managed to wear a tuxedo when he was getting hitched four times–with one more coming down the road at him. He'd been too nervous and terrified at the time to even notice the uncomfortable feeling of the suit and bow-tie trying to choke him. He noticed now. Boy did he notice.
Djanira the Desert Princess raised her hand to be recognized. Billy knew that she was still salty about basically being told to kiss and make up with the Muscle Kingdom when Finn had no defense to offer her. Dreading what she was going to say, the big man recognizd her. Gathering herself to her feet, the strange dessert-person with her sticky, yellow-frosting hair, announced, "we have not been told the meaning of this summons. I had important business, and I was made to get on the train late last night..." It looked like the posturing was going to start early. Billy cut her off, offering, "rumor control, Your Highness."
He could feel Bonnie tense beside him. That was not part of the script. He was supposed to be calmly answering their questions. Trouble was that they had never really articulated just what he was going to do when these women started in like this. The big man did his best to get back on topic. He calmly announced that his father had fallen ill. He calmly told them that Finn was, in fact, in the Candy Clinic just now. Dr. Princess-Mertens was looking after him, and had, in fact, cleared him to be awakened.
"But why's he asleep," demanded Crab Princess?! And that was what got the chorus of cackling hens going. The speculation went wild, with the pack of excitable wenches firing conspiracy theories at each other at such a pace that Billy doubted Bonnie could have followed it all. Maybe Sarah could have. Whistling harshly, the big man silenced the debate. "We're playing on the up and up," he growled! "We could just as easily kept the news to ourselves and let you stew. The facts are that my father is ill. That's life. People get sick. I rushed home to hold down the fort until he's well. He'll be on his feet soon enough. Until then, you'll be dealing with me as the face of the government. Clear?"
Coolly, Belle, the Hotdog Princess, asked, "and the barrier, William? Is the barrier finished?" Billy flushed. That was the dangerous topic. Doing his best to sound confident, the big man explained, "the southern barrier is complete in its initial form all the way to the Grey Forest, where it's been tied to the south end of their Wall of Thorns. The southern section and the heartland are secure." "And the north," Belle pressed? "The north is not yet finished," Billy admitted. "My sister went into labor before she could complete it. The barrier is finished to within two miles of the..."
The room erupted then, with the princesses all shouting at once. It looked like pandemonium might well erupt. From being irritated at having to pay for a defense, the various rulers of the civilized lands had become very interested in that defense. The politicking began immediately, with some demanding that a temporary warlord be placed in charge of the defense. Others were looking to strip the power of defense from the King of Ooo's hands and put it in the hands of a committee of princesses. Others demanded that the Grid-Face people be forced to provide weapons and further technology–a demand that sent Nadia shooting to her feet in rage.
"Shut your damned mouths," Billy snarled! "You're supposed to be enlightened beings! You're going to act like it, or you'll get sent to the dungeon for a few days to cool off!" It was far off the script, and Bonnie shot to her feet. At least she tried to. Both Cherry and Ragnhild clamped their hands on either arm and held her in her seat. Calm returned at the those hard words. Coolly, Billy said, "this is the way things will go. A contingent of the army will be assigned to patrol the wall. I aim to obtain a contingent from the Fire Kingdom with fire-wolves to patrol the border from the air. My sister will be out of post-natal and free to travel again in a month's time. Once she's able, we will complete the last two miles of the permanent Northern Barrier. At that point, we will turn the troops loose to work on rebuilding. Lady Sarah has been working full time on the job of cleansing the lands the Dipped burned. She expects to have a solution within the next two to three months."
"She's a machine," howled Raggedy Princess! "Why can't she work harder?!" "Do you want an imperfect cure," Billy retorted? The princesses shut up. Calmly, the Ice-Prince said, "the cure will be ready when my stepmother believes it is safe for use. Not before. You may be dismissed. My father will return to formal audiences when Lady Drusilla declares that he is ready." Expressions of consternation abounded. They clearly wanted more than that, but it was just as clear that he wasn't giving them any more than he'd given them already. One by one, they began to rise, heading out to their cars and carriages. Billy sighed. That had been every bit as unpleasant as he'd expected.
As the princesses filed out, Bonnie turned and strode back into the chamber behind her throne, anger in her very posture. She was already muttering curses before she'd even gotten completely through the door. She was hardly prepared to hear the voice of the woman she was coming to hate once more. "You're taking this hard," Cherry murmured, as she shut the door. The tall princess had forgotten to shut the door. She'd been seeing red. Turning around, fists clenched, the candy monarch looked as though she might turn to violence. "Do you think I do this to hurt you," Cherry asked? It was frank and calm, just the way the lawyer always was. It was crazy, but Cherry might well have been a defective candy-person. She'd never behaved like any of the others.
"Don't you," Bonnie muttered. Striding forward, the little woman said, "you spent too long getting your way, Bonnibel Bubblegum. You lost your perspective somewhere along the way. You still behave as if you're the only princess in existence. Tell me, how would you have managed it? A dozen cities full of flighty bird-brains getting up to trouble with you the only responsible person there. You could barely take care of the one small town you had. Then you have to add in the few dozen bird-brains with crowns on their heads." Bonnie flushed. She was one of those 'bird-brains'.
Stopping before her former ruler, the Lord of the Underworld said, "the one lesson I learned from Finn is that change is inevitable, Bonnie. You have to change. We all do." Bonnie's blush deepened. "We have to be a family, Bonnie," Cherry told her. "A Royal Family. Not a princess and her chattel." The tall woman flinched as if slapped, as she remembered Finn's not-so-subtle threat to boot her out of the family. "This isn't healthy for you," the little gangster rumbled. "This control-fetish isn't healthy for you anymore than my obsession was healthy for me. I burned up two decades of my life on rage. I can tell you it's a very empty feeling. Whether it's two decades or twenty, rage is an empty emotion." With a wordless howl of anguish, the tall princess turned and ran away, her sobs echoing off the walls as she fled down the hall.
Shaking her head, Cherry sighed. Yeah, that went well. About as well as it had when Star had tried to talk sense into her. Spinning on her heel, the little woman snapped her fingers. Her bodyguard stepped off after her. Work done, she had personal matters to attend to. She'd learned to compartmentalize–ironically from Finn himself. Take care of business without losing your heart. Down in the car park, she climbed into the back of a limo–one of a fleet that she'd arranged the purchase of. With her bodyguard behind the wheel, the little crime boss set out for the hospital.
Weaving through late afternoon traffic, they reached the cross-town freeway and took off, bound for the new Candy-Clinic. The big new hospital had been in the works for years, off and on, delayed by the Lich War and the fight with the Dipped. The capitol had long outgrown the old, sprawling complex, but the change was a bittersweet one for Cherry Mertens. She'd visited the place in the long ago with Root-Beer after the zombie plague got ended. She'd gone there again later when she had started down the vengeance road. Beautiful as she'd been back then, she'd gone in for repeated cosmetic surgeries, enhancing what she'd been born with to bend men to her will. She'd given birth to two sons and a daughter there, each time with Finn holding her hand. But nothing stays the same, she thought.
The new hospital was bustling with traffic. People of all stripes were coming and going. It was more even than the old days. Bonnie's capitol had become the Center of Everything. That was what Root-Beer had predicted long ago. As Captain of the Guard, he'd been privy to some of Bonnie's grand plans and convoluted schemes, and he used to tell his family that some day the Candy Kingdom would be the Center of Everything. He hadn't lived to see the day, but Cherry thought he would be proud of the outcome, even if he might not be proud of her place in it.
Her credentials got them access to a secure garage in the basement, and, in short order, she was stepping out onto the top floor of the west wing, walking past cordons of hospital security guards and hostile bananas toting rifles. Heels click-clacking off the floor of the empty hallway, the little woman emptied her mind of her worries. That serenity had come at a hard and ugly cost. It had nearly cost her soul to earn it, and she was still paying the price.
As she approached the door of her husband's room, her cospouse stood up from the chair by the door, her face a mask of anguish. "I'm sorry," sobbed Breakfast. In point of fact, the fallen princess looked terrified. She'd fucked up again! That was how it looked. Instead of keeping their husband safe, she'd managed to come back with Finn on a stretcher. Calmly, Cherry replied, "are you hurt? Is Pomfrit ok?" Glancing around, she asked, "where's Toast?" "I'm here," said the middle breakfast cutie, as she emerged from Finn's room.
Nodding, Cherry said, "good. Go home and get some sleep. Both of you. You look like hell." Breakfast gulped down a mouthful of angst. Turning to her bodyguard, Cherry said, "my car's downstairs. Take them home. See that they get put to bed." She brooked no argument, and seeing her resolve Toast took her sister's arm and steered her down the hall. Taking a breath–steeling herself–the Princess of the Underworld unlocked the door to Finn's room and went inside.
It was just as Drew had said. He was laying on the bed, the covers pulled up to his chin, just like the day the Dipped nearly killed him in Frozen Yogurt Kingdom. Only this time, his arm wasn't withered. It was completely gone. Drew had an IV plugged into his left arm, and sensors taped to various portions of his anatomy, doing their deal of recording what was going on with his heart, lungs, and brain. He was sleeping. She'd put him to sleep, while she tried to figure out if there were any permanent risks.
Strudel had suggested simply snatching Breezy out of her palace and rushing her here. She'd been practically in the car. As if they could just hijack a fellow princess that way. Simone had shut the whole business down. Breezy was already in hock with her miserable excuse for a husband. They certainly couldn't afford to create more instability in the civilized kingdoms for something that wasn't, at the moment, critical. Finn was going to recover. Cherry was certain of that. She had learned a healthy respect for him. No matter how bad things got, he was never quite down and out.
The little woman knelt by Finn's bedside, taking his hand in hers. It was vibrantly warm and alive, just as it always had been. Bringing his fingers to her lips, she kissed them. "We've got kids to raise, honey," she whispered. "Sleep well and awake." Rising once more, the crime boss headed out. Orzsebet was somewhat falling down on the job. She feared she'd have to get involved to track down the toxic twins. And she had to find new directions for the underworld to go now that prostitution was off limits and the bandit-kingdoms were now looking at having to finally go legit. Just like Finn, her pile of work never seemed to grow smaller. But she was going to do this thing because the family still needed it.
Billy steps up. Bonnie steps out. And Cherry tries to keep the whole thing from coming unglued. And Bronwyn? Well, she's about to go in a little bit deeper than just 'partner'.