Kill The Sun
Author's Note: Not sure how I truly feel about this but here is my contribution since there's not nearly enough Bane content on here anymore. Enjoy xx
Disclaimer: I do not own Bane or any other characters within the Nolanverse or DC universe.
*EDIT: It was brought to my attention that reader/you fics aren't allowed on here so I apologize if I've offended anyone on here. I've made edits to any of my previously uploaded fics to include an OC instead. Again, I apologize I guess I overlooked the guidelines by reading too fast.*
Leah hated her. Maybe hate was a strong word, but she despised the hold Talia had on Bane. Leah's lover. Or whatever he was because she didn't know what to really call him.
At first, it didn't bother her considering their history together. Bane had always been Talia's protector ever since she was born in the pit. He was always there for her whenever she needed or called for him.
It wasn't until things changed between Leah and Bane that she really started to see. See how deep Talia's claws were, so deep that Bane vowed to die for her when the time came for her cause.
Standing under the hot water of the shower, all she could think about was the difference between herself and Talia when it came to Bane.
He went to Talia for everything. Trusted her most out of everyone else in the league. When she called, he followed. Looked to her as his leader. Looked at her like she was the sun.
Leah supposed he trusted her on some level since she would take care of those who got injured and even administered his medicine if needed. It was her bed he would come to for the warmth he'd never ask of Talia. Could never ask of her because he was like a father figure to her. Her protector.
Leaning against the shower wall, she suddenly felt tired of it all. It was never supposed to get complicated which was why he came to her. He asked her about this proposition and told her it would be no strings attached. And she agreed because she never thought feelings would become a problem.
Yet, here she was. Groveling in the shower because things were just as he said they would be.
Leah heard the bathroom door open and close, knowing it was Bane coming in to see her. He stepped into the shower with her and wrapped his arms around her waist pulling her closer. Breathing in the scent of her after another frustrating day as the day they all planned for drew near.
Melting into his touch, she hated herself for it. Hated how much of an effect he had on her besides just physical. But, his presence didn't stop the thoughts. It only made Leah sadder.
"What do you want, Bane?" She asked even though she already knew the answer.
He brushed his mask against the back of her head as his arms still held her. "What I always want." He paused as he rubbed his mask along her neck and shoulder. "You."
She frowned because it wasn't really her he wanted. Not completely. Just her body.
How could she have been so foolish to let herself fall?
When Leah didn't move, he turned her around. He saw the look on her face and felt confused. She was always ready for him whenever he came to her. He didn't understand why she wasn't responding to him today.
"What's wrong?" Bane asked. Leah could barely look at him. "Nothing. I'm just feeling a little tired." She lied.
His eyes narrowed as he looked at her. "You're lying now?" Of course he could detect the lie but she couldn't tell him the truth. It would be silly.
She shrugged which only seemed to irritate him more. "I'm just not in the mood tonight, I guess." Leah said as she turned the shower off and moved to get out.
"But, you're always in the mood whenever I come to you. You have been for the last 6 months." He replied with annoyance in his voice.
Of course that would be his reply. Because that's all he's thinking about. She glared at him, "I know you're used to people doing whatever it is you want, but, sometimes the answer is no. I don't want you tonight."
And there was the sadness again. Because having him in any way would be so much better than not at all. But, she couldn't bear it tonight. It hurt too much.
"You don't want me now?" He hissed.
"No." Leah replied sadly. "Not tonight."
Stepping out of the shower and pulling his clothes on, he started pacing the room angrily. His fists were clenching and unclenching as he went. She has never denied him before. There had to be a reason for this other than Leah not being in the mood. She always wanted him.
"Why? Something must have happened for you to feel this way. Tell me." He ordered.
She moved around him so she could get dressed yourself as she ignored him. Leah wished he would just go away because how could she even mention what the problem was? He wouldn't understand and would also assume she was thinking poorly of his Talia. Which she didn't even want to think of the consequences that came with that.
"Maybe I just don't want this anymore, Bane." Leah sighed because she was lying again. Lying to herself and him.
He stood in front of her now, staring down at her. "Stop lying." He growled.
"Bite me."
Bane glared at her like he never has before. "Now you're being childish." She could see his fists still clenching and unclenching.
"I'm just tired, Bane. I'm tired of everything." Leah replied hoping he would just give up and leave her room. How wrong she was though.
"What is everything? We can't fix this if you won't tell me." He said exasperatedly.
Leah almost laughed. "We? Is that what this even is, Bane?" She said giving up trying to keep all of this in. "I thought all this was was me keeping your bed warm." She scoffed as she felt tears in her eyes.
His eyes widened as he looked at her. Suddenly realizing what she was implying.
"Don't look so surprised." Leah rolled your eyes.
The pacing started again. "You knew what this was. All this could be."He said.
And the tears started because she was so frustrated. "I know what I agreed to, Bane. I know that. But, why does it still have to be just that? I can't keep letting you have me just to watch you leave most of the time once we're finished."
"You know why! Because I won't be here once we follow through with everything we planned."
Leah scoffed as the tears fell. "You mean everything Talia planned? You don't have to go through with this! None of you do! You don't have to do as she says all of the time, you know. She doesn't own you."
Bane stopped and looked at her, "You were for the cause before what's changed now?"
This sadness. It wouldn't go away and felt worse the more she argued with Bane. And the tears wouldn't stop. She knew what changed and was prepared for him to dismiss her once he knew. Because things could never be more than what they always were. What they were only supposed to be.
"My feelings for you." Leah sobbed. "I can't bear the thought of you allowing yourself to die all because of this revenge scheme. I know you're loyal to Talia and always will be, but, it's just not right. You don't need to die. I don't want you to die."
He stopped breathing for a moment. This is exactly what he tried to avoid. He never should have approached her all those months ago but he couldn't stay away. Feelings. They were always messy. Always caused more problems than he needed. But, she wasn't the only one to blame. He was too.
"That isn't really your call." He replied. "This has always been the plan and there's no changing it." He wouldn't let either of their feelings get in the way of what was supposed to be. What had to be.
Leah gave him a sad smile as the tears still kept coming even as she wiped them away. "I'm sorry for that then." It felt like her heart crumbled in her chest.
Turning away refusing to let him see anymore of her tears, he stomped out of the room. This would be the last time Leah saw him until that day. The day he was supposed to die.
He failed.
The day came and went for their big plans for the city to come to a close. Gotham City was supposed to be reduced to ashes. It was supposed to burn with the Batman and everyone else in it. Everyone but Leah, of course. He and Talia were supposed to die together.
But, they failed. He failed.
Leah was stationed somewhere outside of the city. Somewhere she was kept safe in case something like this could possibly happen. As soon as she saw Bane's men carrying him inside the building, Leah couldn't help the sigh of relief that left her.
It had been months since she really last saw him. Months since the night Leah told him how she really felt about him. She saw him in passing but she only exchanged a few words that had more to do with the operation than anything else.
She couldn't bear the thought of living in a world without him.
When Leah took a look at the damage, it looked like his gut was shredded, thanks to whatever Catwoman hit him with. She knew he would be out of it for quite some time when he didn't wake up for a few days after she took care of stitching and bandaging him the best she could. When he finally did, he was only awake for a few moments before he was out again.
Leah met with his second in command, Barsad, about getting supplies for the medicine he needed for his mask. The mask took minor damage. Nothing that couldn't be fixed but the vials he had in the mask were leaking and he would be out of it much sooner than normal.
The first few months of Bane's healing, Leah was so busy she barely had any time to think about anything. By that she meant her feelings for the man. She thought those feelings would have went away since she barely had any contact with him after that night. But, if anything those feelings only grew stronger. Some absence makes the heart grow fonder bullshit, Leah thought.
While Bane made it, Talia didn't.
Leah was afraid to even think how the news of her death would affect him. It had been about six months since that day and he was doing much better as far as healing. He was awake longer and even trying to move around despite his orders to stay put and rest. With this, she knew he needed to be informed of what happened to Talia but she didn't have the heart to do it yet. Leah knew it would break his heart.
It was at the start of the seventh month he broke his silence and spoke of that day. Leah was bringing his lunch into the room and struggling to balance the tray in one hand and the morphine he would need while eating in the other.
"What happened to the bomb?" He rasped through his mask as she sat the tray on his lap. She started working to hook his IV up with the morphine and pondered his question. It was simple enough but hopefully it wouldn't lead to the one question Leah dreaded.
She moved to remove his mask. Still all these months later, she couldn't believe how handsome he was beneath it. His eyes had always been one of Leah's favorite features of his. Mostly because they were the one indicator of how he was feeling and they could be so expressive. But, then she saw those lips. Lips so full and pretty.
Clearing her throat and head of those thoughts, Leah answered. "The Batman sacrificed himself. He flew out into the water with the bomb where it went off."
He paused from eating the soup that was made for him today. She could almost see the wheels turning in his head and knew that question was coming quicker than Leah wished.
Looking up at her with such a calculating look on his face, Bane finally asked, "Where is Talia?"
Dead silence. That's all there was in the room once he finished his question. She felt like she couldn't breathe. How could she give him the answer to that when it was only going to hurt him even more?
Bane called Leah's name. "Answer me. Where is Talia?" She could barely meet his eyes as she gave him the answer she wished she didn't have to.
"She's gone, Bane. I'm sorry."
Watching him, Leah saw a mixture of emotions cross his face. First it looked like panic flashed in his eyes and then sadness. But, then he looked up at her with that glare on his face much like the one from that night all those months ago.
"Sorry? This is what you wanted isn't it?" He hissed at her. "You hated her."
Leah couldn't believe he was attacking her now. Seven months she had been taking care of him, making sure he would make it and that he was comfortable. And he throws that in her face?
"How dare you." She started. "I never wanted that. Never wanted any of this."
His glare only intensified. "No? You didn't want this? Did you not tell me how you felt, about any of this?"
That glare was met with her own because how could he throw all of that back at her? How could he even bring that up after he basically shot her down? If Leah wasn't so angry, she would start crying all over again.
"I never hated Talia. I only hated her plan for Gotham and how she manipulated you to go through with it."
She hated this. Her relationship with Bane used to be simple. There was never this tension like right now with the both of them at each other's throats. Neither ever looked at one another like they hated each other. But, Leah could never hate him even with how he was acting. She almost hated herself for that.
He was seething.
Leah's glare softened because she couldn't keep doing this. If he wanted to fight, she wouldn't even entertain him. She would take care of him until he was back on his own feet and then do who knows what after. Maybe leave altogether.
"Whether you believe it or not, I'm sorry, Bane. I know what she meant to you." She said as she started clearing up the tray and packing the morphine away after putting his mask back in place.
Glancing at him one more time, noticing the glare still in his eyes as he stared off to the side, Leah walked out of the room.
A week passed in silence. She would bring his meals in, check his wound and administer morphine so he could eat. No more words were passed between the two. And she wanted to cry. It was worse than before.
Leah missed him so much.
At first, she tried to start some kind of conversation but after the second day she gave up when she received no response. she wished she could know what he was thinking. Something.
It was at the start of the second week of silence when Leah just wasn't having a good day to begin with. She felt over emotional, anxious and she just wanted to curl up in bed and hide away.
She was bringing dinner to Bane and felt like she was going to collapse onto the floor and cry. Everything was just getting to be too much for her. Setting the tray across his lap as usual and starting to work on hooking the morphine up, she avoided eye contact with him as much as possible.
His eyes were watching her as she moved around the room. But, Leah ignored him. Just as he had been ignoring her.
"You're crying." His voice startled her.
Leah looked toward him as she felt her face and sure enough she was crying. Not answering Bane, she started clearing everything up to leave the room again.
When she went to take the tray from his lap, Leah felt his hand grab her arm. Looking down at his hand holding her, he asked, "Why are you crying?"
"I'm fine." She said while gently pulling her arm away and walking out of the room.
It was at the end of month nine when she told Bane he was mostly back to his normal self. Normal as in how he was physically before the day of the bomb.
Things were still tense whenever she walked into his room. Leah figured maybe it would be best if she left now that he was back on his feet properly. She didn't know what she would do but she didn't think either of them could function like this.
Gradually Leah started packing her things. She wasn't even sure where she'd be going. All she knew was she had to get out of here. She would figure things out as they came.
It didn't even occur to her until the last of her things were boxed that she needed to tell Bane. Would he even let her leave? As soon as that thought passed she thought why would he even care. It was clear over the last few months that he didn't feel anything close to how she felt for him. Not even a little bit.
All Leah had been was someone to take care of him and warm his bed when needed. He didn't want her. A fact that made her cry every time she told herself it.
She knocked on his office door and waited for him to answer.
"Yes?" Leah could hear the annoyance in his voice.
Opening the door, she walked into his office and asked nervously, "Can I talk to you for a minute?" He didn't even look up from his desk as he moved his fingers letting her know to come closer.
"What is it?" He asked as he continued writing something down.
Biting her lip because she didn't know how he was going to react or maybe she did and hated the thought of him confirming even more how he didn't feel anything for her.
"I'm leaving." Leah blurted out.
She could have sworn she heard his breath catch but chalked it up to hearing things. He sat so still for a few minutes that she almost thought he hadn't heard her, if it weren't for the fact he dropped his pen.
More silence. She wished he would just say something. Anything.
"I just thought I would let you know." She said softly, almost heartbroken that this was it. He didn't even care enough to stop her.
If she could see his face though, Leah would know how much this was affecting him. Almost the same look on his face as when she first told him Talia was gone.
She couldn't help the few tears that fell from her eyes feeling stupid. So stupid for ever thinking things with her and Bane could have been anything more than they were ever supposed to be.
Turning away from him, Leah started for the door. No point in standing around wishing and hoping for a response that wouldn't come.
Opening the door she went to walk out when Bane finally spoke causing her to completely freeze.
"Stay."
He was still facing his desk. Leah turned back around, walking towards him again.
"What?" She questioned as she walked to the front of his desk so she could look at him.
Looking up at her, Leah saw an expression on his face that she's never seen before. It was the softest she's ever seen him.
"You heard me." He rasped.
She moved to sit in the other chair at his desk because she thought she may fall over. "Why?"
He gave Leah an almost annoyed looked as he asked, "Do you really not know?"
Here we go. Leah couldn't help but roll her eyes at him. "No, I don't, Bane. If you haven't noticed for the last year or so, things haven't been so great between us. So yes, I'd really like to know why I should even bother staying."
More silence. If anyone should be annoyed about this situation it was Leah. She was the one who kept getting flip flopped here but he's the one sitting there acting as if she was truly bothering him now.
Sighing, she pleaded, "Please."
Leah could see the conflict on his face as he turned to the side. "I want you here. I'm not quite done with you yet."
Was this real? She was probably a fool for falling for those words but she didn't care. 'I want you here.'
More tears fell from Leah's eyes as she looked to him almost asking if what he was saying meant what she wanted to hear that night more than a year ago.
Leah saw he was smiling by how his eyes crinkled and all but jumped onto his lap hugging him. It felt so good after all this time apart. Bane buried his face into her hair breathing her scent in as he whispered, "I want you."
Pulling away from him, Leah couldn't stop herself from placing a kiss on his mask where those lips would be as his hands pulled her completely onto his lap.
"I've always wanted you."
Leah suddenly felt that things would be okay now. Things were never supposed to get this far between them but sometimes how things are supposed to be is never how they're meant to be.