The next few weeks flew by in a flash.

Mei came back to the Roshigumi, though integrated back in slowly. Having a heart-to-heart with the men individually. Apologizing and everything—her pride being outweighed by the loneliness. Nothing much changed, the organization itself wasn't much different but the government noticed them, requested their presence at times to fight. It was all working out for them, and she seemed happy for the band of misfits that held her captive.

Mei kept her small exchange between Okita, and the man Kazama Chikage, to herself. The former only out of embarrassment, but the latter more so for the fact she was still not ready to reveal that small detail of her life to the men. She was of royal blood, though the men might have been already figuring that out, saying it out loud wasn't something she was ready for. Would they treat her differently? Or would it be an even better reason to kill her since she was a foreigner? What were the chances she and Kazama would run into each other again?

But for Mei, personally, something was getting worse for her. That voice in her head, repeating curses of death at the people around her. It always held words of contempt for everyone else. She could avoid it now during the day, once taking her medicine, it would take three days to wear off. But it seemed it didn't carry into her subconscious. While she slept, she had one of two dreams. One of the memories when her family was ripped away from her, or one where she was completely in the dark, the only thing visible was herself and a red silhouette of a female in front of her. Speaking to her with that voice in her head.

She felt like she was losing her mind.

Now that the sun was up, she simply pushed those specific worries into the back of her mind as she helped Inoue while he and most of the other men were away.

"Ryunosuke, why don't you help me for a second?" Mei asked lightly, handing the boy a basket, "I want them to be ready by the time everyone gets back." She stated as she hung up more of the blankets that she just washed. She had her hair up and out of her face, wearing another sakura pink yukata the guys seemed to get her since it was going to get cold soon and knew the woman wasn't going to get her servants to bring her winter clothes back, and a black haori.

The sun was going down, and it had been some time since the men were back at the compound, they could have returned at any moment.

And as if God had heard her thoughts, she heard Ryunosuke rush towards the sound of three pairs of footsteps. She walked out after him and smiled at Inoue and two other men before her expression returned to her usual neutral look. Before he or Rynosuke could say anything, "Dinner is almost ready. All of you… Get cleaned up." She stated before retreating inside the compound.

Relief washed over her, knowing all the men she knew and cared for would return safely. Any injuries were probably taken care of by Yamazaki, so she didn't have to worry about anyone coming in shambles.

Mei walked into the kitchen and began to prepare everyone's dishes before setting them out in the common room where they ate.

"Mei is looking prettier in the Yukata huh?" Shinpachi stated as he caught sight of the First Division Captain's page.

"Are you saying I didn't look pretty in my Chinese clothes, Shinpachi?" Mei asked a bit lowly as she slowly glanced at the man behind her.

"No!"

"Oh, Shin fucked up now." Heisuke laughed a bit.

Harada nodded in agreement.

This image was her life now. She lived with the Roshigumi as a page, an occasional warrior and a sparring partner to the man who spared her life. Li was not making any movements for her swords in the time that passed, and it greatly concerned her, though didn't want to worry the guys. She felt they were too busy to think about her familial issues, so she kept such concerns to herself.

Another few days passed, and everyone had been able to relax after their battle.

That was when Kondou, Hijikata, and Sanan had asked everyone to meet in the common room for an announcement. Per usual, Mei was set to sit in the back of the room, listening to Kondou.

"Everyone, you did wonderfully the other day." He started, "The Lord of Aizu held our work in high regard. He now says that he would like to officially entrust Kyoto's patrols to us." The Commander looked very happy as he spoke to his men, and Mei couldn't help but feel very happy for them, though kept that smile tugging at her lips to herself.

"That's awesome!" Shinpachi grinned.

"This should make conducting our patrols a lot easier." Harada added with a smile.

But Kondou wasn't finished just yet, "And he bestowed a great honor upon us. The Lord of Aizu has bequeathed a new name onto our squad." The men gasped a bit in awe as Kondou raised a scroll beside him and unraveled it to show everyone the new name they were given. "We are the Shinsengumi."

Every man in the room before the three commanding officers gasped and lightly cheered as they heard for the first time, their new name gifted to them.

"Supposedly this was the name of an organization in the Aizu Domain. Those who excelled in military arts gathered under it." Hijikata chimed in as happy as the demonic Vice Commander could be.

Again, the men opened expressed their excitement and happiness.

"Wow, that's kinda inspiring isn't it?" Heisuke piped up with a smile.

Kondou interrupted their early mini celebration by clearing his throat. Everyone turned their eyes to him, "So, in other words, the Lord of Aizu believes that the Roshigumi are worthy as warriors to inherit such a grand name. To meet his expectations, we must further dedicate ourselves to our mission." He smiled, but his voice rang with his warmth ad authority.

The men all agreed with a "Yes".

"It's not everyday that you get a day as sweet as this." Heisuke smiled, "Hijikata, how about it? It's been ages since we partied."

Hijikata looked at Heisuke before turning his attention to Kondou at his left. The two shared some telepathic conversation before they both nodded and smiled. "Yes, we will all celebrate together tonight."

All the men seemed to cheer in excitement, especially the top men of the Roshi- the Shinsengumi. Mei sighed a bit in relief for the good news before she silently left the room and headed for the gardens. Being a room full of excitement wasn't exactly her cup of Saké.

Once she reached the Garden she enjoyed so much she sat upon the veranda and leaned her head against the beam beside her. She realized how much she truly enjoyed the calm the last few days, the presence of such loud and happy faces. The warmth that Kondou brought them. Almost like a father to his children.

Mei slowly opened her eyes to look at the ground. She was afraid to lose all of it. How long would she have before they were all taken away from her, leaving her the memories of what cannot be brought back. She had forgotten how scared her thought could make her. She was scared enough to try and distance herself again, but it was much too late to do that now.

Shaking her head, she shut her eyes, she wouldn't think about that now. They were new men today. They deserved to celebrate their accomplishments without her having another freak out. "Maybe I need some rest." She whispered before she slowly got to her feet. Her body felt heavy, and she felt a bit hot considering the day was a bit chilly. "It must be another fever." She whispered as she made her way to her room.

"Mei." Someone called out.

The woman stopped in her tracks before she slowly turned to see it was Harada, "Oh…. Was there something you needed, Harada?" She asked as she turned her body towards him.

"Nothing really, aren't you going to join in the celebration tonight?" He asked as he took a few steps forward, "What's bothering you?" He suddenly asked as he could clearly see it in her eyes.

"Ah… Nothing, just thinking. I'm not much of a partier, but I'll join you for saké later if that's alright with you?" Mei asked with a light smile, a forced smile, as she couldn't shake off her fears.

"Mei…" Harada said a bit softer, reaching out and gently touching her cheek. "You can talk to me, you know that." He murmured with evident concern on his eyes, a gentle smile on his lips before it faded, and he moved his hand to her neck then her forehead. "Mei, you're a little hot." He stated with much more concern. "Have you been sleeping well? Or is it because you've been working too hard."

Mei shook her head and gave him a sheepish smile, "I just need to rest, okay? We'll talk about it over some saké later I promise." She stated before she quickly turned on her heel and walked off to her room.

Once there she closed the door behind her and quickly removed her clothes and redressed in her white sleeping kimono. "I just need some sleep and I'll be all better." She whispered as she slipped into her futon, turning on her side, holding her swords close to her, and closed her eyes. Just some sleep… and I'll feel better. She thought before she felt exhaustion slowly grip onto her and pull her into unconsciousness.

~Dream~

Everything was black, and laying down in that abyss was Mei, and no more than 5 feet in front of her, was a blood red silhouette with a white, menacing grin.

"Hello Mei." The silhouette said, though that grin didn't change. She got to her knees in front of Mei before tilting her head to the side. "Wake up, little Mei.

"… Please… Let me sleep… Just this once…" Mei begged as she slowly opened her eyes to stare at the red figure. "What do you want?" She asked as she pushed herself up from the ground, "I am not going to kill them… I won't ever attempt to." She stated a bit more firmly.

"Even if they turned into furies themselves?" The woman asked. "Would you really be able to subdue your hatred for the very things that nearly wiped out the Shi family, the only exception being you." The figure seemed to be taking pleasure feeding off the thoughts Mei had been so fearful of thinking.

Mei looked down at the ground a bit her lip, "They… They would never… Become furies… They're stronger than that." She growled as best as she could however her voice was heavy with uncertainty.

"Humans are weak things, Mei." The figure argued.

"They aren't weak!"

"So, you say, however, you've only known them for almost a year… You don't know how strong they actually are, or if they're that strong at all." She cooed into her ear. "They will crave more power… All humans do…

Mei felt the tears forming in her eyes as a flash of all the men she had grown to care for had white hair and crimson eyes. "Stop it…!" She screamed before she grabbed onto the woman's shoulders and tried to push her away. But the moment she touched her, she regretted it.

The red slowly dissolved into a smoke, and slowly the details of the figure came to her vision. She had familiar skin, a familiar figure, familiar blue eyes… a familiar bracelet around her wrist. Quickly she pulled her hands away, and the red returned to cover the figure's features from her view.

"Go away! Get away from me!" She screamed as she crawled away from the figure once more.

"You can't run away from what you're afraid of… You can't run away from me!You crave power. You can't run away from who you were born to be." The figure hissed as she grabbed Mei by her shoulder and neck and pressed her to the ground. And before Mei could take in the sight of the female's identity, she shut her eyes.

-Reality-

Mei shot up from her futon, soaked in sweat and panting for breath, hand was at her throat. Her hair stuck to her neck and face a bit before she pushed her blankets off her and stood to her feet. She was a bit unsteady once she stood before she stumbled to the window and coughed up phlegm onto the grass just outside. Once she got that out of her system the woman fell to her ass on the floor before she covered her face and tried to collect herself.

And the best way to do that—was a bath.

Mei waited till everyone was in the full swing of their celebrating before she slipped into the small bathhouse they had, with extra clothes her servants must have left in her room while she slept. With a grateful sigh of relief, Mei slipped into the warmed-up water before she grabbed the nearest bucket and dumped the water over her head. Her muscles relaxed beneath the touch of the water and the smell of her sweat quickly disappeared as she washed her body and hair free of her own filth.

She dumped out the dirty water once she finished cleaning herself before filling it up again and deciding to just relax in its gradually fleeting heat. Her nose barley stayed above the water as she closed her eyes and had her hair over the edge of the wooden Ofuro.

~Memory~

The sound of running water was music to Mei's ears as she laid her head on her mother's chest whilst she stroked her hair as well.

"Year after year, effortlessly, sleep soundly and have a good night… Year after year, effortlessly, you grow up into a good person~ Thank you, God, thank you too, my angel... Year after year, effortlessly, sleep on mama's chest~" Her mother, Kiku, sang softly as she gently rocked on her seat upon her stool by the window. "Mama loves you so much, Mei~"

"Mei loves mama too!" The small three-year old smiled in glee.

Kiku chuckled at her youngest child before kissing the top of her head and getting up to carry the girl outside. "When your all grown up, I hope you find someone you truly love, no matter who they are. They're class, race, or ethnicity… I just want you to be happy, without the fear of war…" She murmured gently as she reached up to touch one of the blooming cherry blossoms. Plucking one up from the branch she placed it in her daughter's hair, "My dear, sweet child."

-Reality-

Mei opened her eyes as she let the memory fade out in her mind. It had been so long since she had heard her mother or father, the last time being a fever induced hallucination, or perhaps their spirits, who knows. She slowly lifted her wrist from the water that adorned the gold bracelet that the intricately designed pendent hung from. She stared at the pendent that had her family's crest engraved on it. She wasn't particularly thinking of anything, until it dawned on her. When exactly had she gotten that bracelet?

"Mei, so this is where you went."

The woman hid her hand and she quickly looked back towards the door, wincing as she did, before she narrowed her eyes on emerald green orbs.

"What, I just came looking for you. Harada has been bugging me to go get you for the last hour." Okita said in defense before he smirked. "I didn't come here to catch a glimpse at you. You're really not that pretty and not my type."

His comment caused his sometimes volatile page to growl before she threw the bucket at him, "Well, you know what? Who asked you?!" She frowned, but no one could deny the slight rosy color that dusted her cheeks.

Okita caught the bucket without much trouble before he set it down and stepped out, laughing, "I'll just be waiting out here till your done~" He cooed before he closed the door and more than likely turned around.

Mei huffed before she got out of the Ofuro and began to dry herself off then changing into her usual Chinese clothes except the dress's slit wasn't so far up and instead below the middle of her thigh, tied by some fabric, and the sleeves were longer, gradually flaring out to her hands and covered half of her hands. Her hair was still wet, so she brushed it to the side over her shoulder with her fingers. "I'm done." She stated.

No sooner did the door open and Okita waited for her to step out.

Mei did and stood in front of him, "Did you need something? Or was Harada the only reason you came looking?" She asked softly.

Okita only smirked his signature smirk before he reached out and unbuttoned the button on her neck and tugged it down a bit as his eyes trained on her skin, "Any reason why your neck is bruising up?" He asked as his fingertips ghosted along the darkening skin. He caught the slight flinch the woman made at the touch on the soft tissue, before he noticed her eyes had widened a fraction.

She hadn't even realized her neck was bruising.

"A-Ah… I'm not quite sure myself." Mei murmured as she stepped away from him, but she wasn't able to get far.

"What did I say about lying?" Okita stated as he grabbed her wrist.

Mei let out a small yelp as he pulled her back in front of him. "I'm not lying…!" She insisted as she looked up at him firmly. "I just… I'm not sure how I got it yet…"

"Did someone else do this to you?"

"No, I assure you… Who here can get close enough to do this?" Mei said, a bit offended. She supposed there were a few people, but she was pretty sure those men were at the small party, and none of them would harm her like that.

Okita sighed before he released the woman, "…."

Mei held her wrist a bit before she looked at Okita. "… I wouldn't lie to you. I know better than that." She tried to insist.

"I know, I know…" Okita sighed again before he started down the hall. "Come one, Harada is waiting for you."

Mei didn't miss another beat, following her master quickly, buttoning her neck once more before letting her arms fall to her sides.

The night went smoothly from then on, Harada and her sharing a drink, telling him about her dreams but about the figures appearance. Only the overwhelming fear and reluctance to ever get near her or see who the figure was portraying, opting to censor out the part where the figure somehow bruised her neck.

While all the festivities continued, and smiles were all around, Mei could faintly smell the scent of ash in the air. She didn't think much of it, so she didn't tell anyone, but perhaps she should've.

That day was the start of the next chapter for the New Shinsengumi.

Sorry for the long wait, I tried to get this out like a week ago but I got super busy and forgot what I was writing. Please Review, favorite and follow if you liked it. You should still review if you have some criticism. Those are always welcomed :) Anyways, I hope everyone had a good Christmas and Happy New Years. This is my gift to you please enjoy and if not I'll work harder next time.

Love always,

Chess~