Chapter Twenty One

Draco and Luna barely had time to bask in their cleverness before the full force of the next trial hit them head on.

One moment Draco telling Luna how brilliant she was and the next he was hurled back into that traumatic day in the Room of Requirement and was forced to relive every agonizing second. He saw Crabbe trying to kill Potter and the others before conjuring the fiendfyre, even after Draco had ordered him not to, then watched helplessly as the room went up in flames while he tried to save Goyle by dragging him up onto a fragile pile of charred desks.

He once again suffered through the intense heat and paralyzing fear that he was going to be burned alive as he heard and smelled the same fate consuming Crabbe - except at this point the scene deviated from the actual events.

This time he and Goyle weren't rescued by Potter and Weasley. This time the trio flew past, jeering that Draco deserved the fiery end that awaited him. He and Greg tried to climb higher but the other boy didn't make it. As the flames then licked towards Draco, he heard his mother calling out. He spun around and saw Narcissa clawing her way through the burning debris trying to save her only child. He begged her to turn back then watched in horror as the fire devoured her, all the while hearing the voice of his father berating him about what a failure he was.

Then things got even worse. There was a soft cry and to Draco's horror he spied Luna standing in the middle of the conflagration pleading with him to rescue her. He fought desperately to reach her but before he got close he witnessed the flames claim her as well.

Just as Draco felt his own body succumbing to the fire, the scene reset and he was made to experience the same thing over and over again. During the third round, however, a different sound began to invade his consciousness. By the fourth time he was able to push back at the images just enough to recognize the inconsistencies in the timeline - not only had he escaped but neither his mother nor Luna had ever been in the room that day to begin with.

This awareness allowed him to finally isolate the noise he was hearing and determine that it was the sound of the real Luna in distress. This knowledge jump started the synapses he needed. He closed his eyes and struggled to remember the mental tricks Snape taught him to protect his mind from this type of assault. It took an intense amount of concentration and effort for him to implement those tactics without his magic but eventually he was able to break free of the illusion.

He resurfaced from the overwhelming sea of images, gasping for air. He shook his head firmly to clear his brain then searched wildly for Luna, finally locating her curled up on the floor a short distance away, whimpering like an injured animal. He scooped her into his arms and charged forward, not slowing until he felt the mental onslaught start to die down. Even then he pushed on until he could go no further, hoping the more distance he put between Luna and the spell the weaker it would become.

Once he felt far enough away he dropped to his knees and cradled her in his arms. "Shhh...It's okay, Luna. I promise. It's not real. Whatever you're seeing, it's not real." He rocked back and forth repeating, "Not real, I tell you. Push past it. It's a lie, understand? Come on. You can do it. Fight it, you hear me?"

As Luna continued to shudder and squirm, Draco tightened his grip and whispered fiercely, "Come on, love! Listen to me. Focus on my voice. Listen to me and...and breath, remember? Like you taught me. In and out. In and out. Like this." He inhaled and exhaled slowly as an example.

A second later he felt a slight change in her breathing. "That's it. Good girl. Just like that. Breathing, hearing...now, touch... touch...What can I..." He quickly reached into his pack and produced a soft wool blanket which he wrapped around her before embracing her once again. "There. Nice and warm and snuggly, right?"

Luna settled down a bit but continued to flinch and twitch as if in pain. Draco worked to keep his panic under control. Another thought occurred to him and he fished a piece of chocolate from his pocket. "Here you go. I bet this will get your attention, eh?"

He unwrapped one corner and held it under her nose. "Smell that? The good stuff, right?" He broke off a tiny sliver and slipped it gently into her mouth, trying not to think about how it felt when his fingers brushed her lips. "How about that? I'm wagering wherever you think you are they don't have European chocolate, do they? I'm saving the rest of that for when we find the scroll. Did you hear that? I said when - not if - so don't you dare make a liar out of me, Luna Scamander Previously Lovegood."

Luna's face relaxed slightly but other than that she remained unresponsive.

"Come on, love," begged Draco, running his fingers through her hair. "Fight this. You can do it. I know you can. I called you impulsive the other night but I was wrong. You aren't impulsive. You are brave - so very, very brave. As a matter of fact, you are the bravest person I've ever met. I'd take you, just you on your own, over a whole battalion of bloody Gryffindors - any day of the week and twice on Sundays, you know that?"

"And that's why I need you to fight." Draco's voice started to break. "Please? Please, Luna. Please, love. I can't do this without you. Any of this. Please..."

Luna abruptly convulsed in his arms and for a moment he was terrified that he was losing her. She then woke with a start, eyes darting wildly about as she tried to regain her bearings. She looked at Draco and whispered, "Draco? Is that you?"

"Yes, love. It's me. Are you okay?"

Tears started to stream down Luna's cheeks. "Oh, Draco. I'm sorry. So sorry. Truly, I am. Please, forgive me. I didn't mean..."

"Hey...Shh...Hush," said Draco, wiping her face. "There's nothing for you to be sorry about. I'm fine. Everything's fine."

Luna shook her head violently. "No. No. It's not. It's my fault. All my fault. All of it."

"Luna, I don't know what you think is your fault but..."

"Everything! Everything..." And with a sob, Luna haltingly revealed the visions that had tormented her.

She had relived the deaths of her mother, father and late husband - all of whom (in her mind) blamed Luna for what happened to them. Her mother had claimed the experiment that took her life went wrong because her young daughter distracted her and she would have been fine if she hadn't tried to shield Luna from the spell.

The scene had then shifted to Azkaban where Luna heard her father blaming her for his wife's death. She had then watched helplessly as he was tortured by the dementors all the while insisting that everything would have been fine if Luna hadn't become friends with Harry and the others.

Next had been Rolf on the other side of quarantine glass - crying out that if Luna had come along on that fateful trip he wouldn't have gotten sick or at the very least they both would have contracted the pox and passed together, instead of him dying all alone in a cold, sterile hospital room.

Just when Draco thought his heart couldn't take any more, Luna said in a small voice, "Then there was you..."

"Me?"

The anguish on her face was heartbreaking as she choked out, "I had it all wrong. We didn't find the scroll in here and when we finally got out your magic was gone and you were so very angry with me. You shouted and threw things and called me..."

Draco cut her off gently but firmly, "It doesn't matter what you imagined I said. You can forget it. All of it, because it wasn't true. None of it was true, understand?"

"But..."

"But nothing. It was a nasty piece of spell work set up to prey upon our worst fears. None of it was true and nobody blames you for anything, Luna. I know that because we all love you and we would never want you to feel guilty for something that wasn't your fault. Ever. Do you hear me?"

As she continued to tremble, Draco took her hands in his and pleaded, "Please, Luna. You have to believe me, okay? No matter what happens, I will never blame you. Even if I lost my magic. Even if I die tomorrow - which I'm not planning on, by the way - I swear to you that I. Will. Not. Blame. You."

He moved his hands to her face and forced her to look at him. "Now - give us a nod and let me know that you understand that, will you?"

He brushed her cheek with his thumb until he got a feeble nod from her.

"There we go," said Draco. "Now I'm going to try and get you properly warmed up. I see some bits of fire crab shell lying about. Let's see if I can make this work without magic, shall we?"

Draco stacked some stones into a makeshift fire pit, tossed in some fire crab shells and pulled out the waterproof muggle matches Luna had packed. On the third try the match caught and soon they had a small but cozy fire going.

Draco pulled her close and briskly rubbed her arms to warm her. "There. Not much but better than nothing."

"Thank you," whispered Luna.

"You are most welcome but if you really want to thank me then promise not to tell Potter just how many of these muggle items I relied on. Can't let him think I owe him anymore than I already do. I have a reputation to uphold around him, you know."

"Your secret is safe with me," said Luna. She wrapped the blanket tighter and rested her head on his shoulder. "Can we stay here for a while?"

"I think that's an excellent idea," said Draco. He slipped off their headlamps as he lay down, pulling her along with him. "I don't know about you but I've just been through a hell of a scare and my focus isn't what it ought to be. If we press on in this condition I'm afraid we'll walk into something that we can't walk out of. I say we rest for a bit and move forward when we're more refreshed, okay?"

They managed to drift off for a while until Draco felt her moving restlessly as if she was having a bad dream and when he sat up he found she had rolled free of the blanket. He was covering her back up when, without waking, she turned and wrapped her arms around his waist. As soon as she did this her entire demeanor shifted. Her expression changed from one of tension and anxiety to one of peace and contentment. She sighed and smiled in her sleep as if all were now right with the world.

The instinctive intimacy of that act caused something to crack within Draco and in a flash all of the emotional defenses that he had painstakingly constructed came tumbling down. He brushed a stray hair from her face and pressed a lingering kiss onto her forehead.

He pulled back and froze when he saw that she was now awake. Their eyes met and he was about to stammer out an apology when Luna unexpectedly grabbed the front of his jumper and crashed her lips to his. What little resolve he had left crumbled away and he melted into the kiss, savoring every second and wondering at the fact that the reality of her was infinitely better than anything he had imagined.

He wanted to stay like that forever but soon a klaxon began sounding in his brain, screaming at him that she was confused. She was obviously still in a dream state and was most likely under the impression that she was kissing her late husband. The thought of her disgust when she realized he had taken advantage of the situation caused him to push her away, saying, "Stop. Luna. No."

He waited for the harsh rebuke for taking liberties with her but instead the words she spoke both shocked and bewildered him.

"My apologies," she said. "For a moment I forgot that you find me hideous."

"Wait. W-what?!" Draco stared in disbelief then reached to inspect her skull. "Hold on. Did you sustain a head injury back there? Did that spell scramble your brain?"

Luna swatted his hands and scooted away from him. "Oh, please, Draco. I've done everything including literally throwing myself at you. You're not gay, married or otherwise involved. The only other reason a man that has been alone as long as you have consistently rejects the advances of a female is because he finds them repulsive."

"Hold on. You think that's why..." Draco began to laugh. "Great gorgons! Of all the blind, misguided,..."

He stopped when he saw the pain in Luna's eyes. "There is no need to be cruel, Draco. You've already made it clear..." She choked on her words and turned away in an effort to hide her tears.

"Oh, bugger. Luna. No. Look at me. Please, Luna." He moved in front of her and lifted her head. "Merlin's beard, woman. I thought you were the smart one. You honestly don't know?"

"Know what?"

"It seriously never occurred to you that the reason I've been pushing you away is that I was afraid?"

Luna sniffed. "Afraid of what?"

The words rushed out before he could stop himself. "Oh, I don't know. Afraid that I wasn't good enough for you? Afraid of never living up to memory of the sainted Rolf Scamander? Afraid you'd tell me what you really thought of a filthy former Death Eater? Afraid that you'd laugh in my face or worse, hex me into the next century?"

He cupped her face in his hands and his voice grew hoarse. "Afraid that once I finally held you and tasted you that I'd never be able to stop?" He slowly lowered his face towards hers. "Because it turns out I was one hundred percent right about that one."

Looking back they were never certain which of them closed the gap between them but that time when their lips met there was no turning back for either of them. The kisses which started soft and tender slowly grew deeper and hungrier until soon they were lost in an increasingly passionate embrace. It was only when Draco realized that his hands had made their way under her blouse and he felt her tugging at his belt that he forced himself away from her once again.

"Wait. Stop," he panted.

He grabbed her wrists and moved her hands up to his shoulders. "And before you get any more ludicrous notions about me not wanting you, let me assure you that is not the case. But when I make love to you for the first time it will not be on the floor of a cold, dank cave. It will be in an actual bedroom, in an actual house, on a soft, comfortable bed covered with silk sheets in front of a roaring fire surrounded by candles and flowers and only AFTER I have done the respectable thing and taken you on a suitable number of dinner dates."

Luna raised an eyebrow as she worked to catch her breath. "That sounds incredibly...specific, Draco. Given this much thought, have you?"

Draco blushed slightly. "It may have crossed my mind several hundred times recently."

"Well, in that case, before we proceed any further, may I ask you to clarify a few things?"

Draco cleared his throat. "Such as?"

"Such as whether your specific choice of words was deliberate."

"Which words are in question, exactly?" inquired Draco.

"You said 'when' we make love instead of 'if' - thereby implying you see this as an inevitable conclusion. You also said the 'first time' - leading me to believe that this is an event that you envisioned occurring more than once." She looked him in the eye and asked, "Is that the message you wished to convey or have I misunderstood?"

Oh, well, Draco thought, I've gone this far. No use denying anything at this point. He nodded and said, "That was indeed the meaning I was trying to get across."

"All right then. Would it be okay if I requested a modification to the scenario you put forward?"

"Absolutely."

"Good. Well the thing is, Draco...And, please, don't take this the wrong way but..." Draco's heart sank as he anticipated her polite rejection. "I'm truly sorry but...I don't like silk sheets. Or satin for that matter. Would it be all right if we opted for linen bedding instead?"

Draco blinked twice then managed to stammer, "Th-That's it?! Ch-changing the fabric of the sheets? That's the ONLY problem you have with everything I just said?"

"Yes. Although I would like to make an additional request as well, if that's all right?"

Draco couldn't get the words out fast enough. "Anything. Name it."

"You mentioned taking me out to dinner and that does sound lovely, but can there also be a home cooked meal thrown in there as well? Now that I know how talented you are at preparing food on a campfire, I'd love to see what you could accomplish with a proper kitchen at your disposal."

Draco exhaled an enormous sigh of relief and pulled her close. "That can certainly be arranged. What would the lady like for her bespoke meal?"

Luna nuzzled against his chest. "I don't know. Does Chef Malfoy have a recommendation?"

"Hmmm...I think for an occasion of that nature we ought to go with something simple yet elegant. Italian perhaps? Good pasta, fine wine and for dessert..."

Luna's head popped up. "Pudding?"

Draco laughed. "Of course! I was assuming you would prefer chocolate?"

Luna nodded enthusiastically. "Yes, please."

Draco gathered her back into his arms. "Then the lady shall have as much chocolate pudding as her heart desires."

They snuggled and snogged until Luna sat back and whispered, "Of course this is all just an exercise in wishful thinking if we can't find a way out of here."

Draco kissed her softly and said, "I don't know about you but I now have yet another incredibly powerful incentive to ensure that we both make it out of here alive and well."

"Me too," Luna smiled as she stood and reached her hand towards Draco. "All right, then. Let's get started. The sooner we find the scroll and get out of here, the sooner we can start the rest of our lives and I'm suddenly feeling a ravenous urge for pudding."