A/N: It's 2 am. I can't sleep, and the world is burning...so let's enjoy some ShikaSaku.
Waiting was never easy for Sakura. In fact, if she were to compile a list of the most unbearable tasks in the world, it would probably rank just below performing surgery or scrubbing a toilet. She was impatient and antsy and flustered, which didn't bode well when she was already desperately missing her lover.
Wait… were they lovers?
They hadn't really put a name to it yet, and, honestly, she didn't know if they ever would.
Sakura often pondered the nature of their relationship on nights like these. They had grown close lately. Well, as close as Shikamaru would allow. He wasn't much for touchy-feely things, and she understood that. She didn't want to change him.
But as the weeks passed and they had begun spending more time together, she could only wonder how he saw her. How he felt about her.
It didn't help that he was always so damn quiet. Even during their more intimate moments, he seemed to keep a wall up, an invisible barrier that kept her at arm's length. He was an anomaly—a puzzle—and he drove Sakura absolutely mad wondering what he was thinking. In a way, he was the most simple man in Konoha—he didn't ask for much and (despite how bothersome he found it) he always kept his responsibilities in order. But he was also deeply complex, with little ticks and habits about him that Sakura had yet to decode.
And for all of those things, she had fallen in love with him.
She had realized it a few weeks ago. Hell, maybe even before that. But the reality of it still hit her like a punch to the gut. She wouldn't be able to tell Shikamaru, of course—he probably wouldn't reciprocate. However, she couldn't help the small hope that maybe there was a bit of love for her somewhere inside him.
Even if it was just a drop.
Suddenly, Sakura was pulled from her thoughts by the flare of approaching chakra, and with that, she jolted up in bed.
Finally.
Seconds later—after Shikamaru realized the seal on the door was unlocked—it opened.
He was caked in blood and dirt and kami knew what else, tired and maybe a little paranoid—as was usually the case when he returned from a long mission. His gaze softened a bit when he realized the trespasser was only Sakura.
"How long have you been here?"
His voice was distant, hollow. She could tell he was in that place again.
"A while," she answered vaguely, rising from the bed to give him a peck on the cheek—cautious. Shikamaru usually needed space after his missions, and she was more than happy to give it to him.
"Ah."
He turned away to sift through his dresser, pulling out a pile of fresh clothes before silently making his way to the bathroom. Moments later, Sakura heard the shower turn on.
He hadn't even asked her to join him.
It must've been pretty bad this time.
Her heart squeezed a little, but she told herself she was fine. She had to be fine—for him.
She returned to the bed, sinking into the mattress and nuzzling into one of the pillows. It smelled like the forest and the sun and the sky—like him —and she drank it in. She guessed she had fallen asleep because the next thing she knew there was a pair of lips on her neck.
Drowsily, her fingers laced through thick, damp hair, and she hummed, pleased to find it free from the usual confines of a ponytail. She squinted to see two dark orbs gazing down at her in the half-light; the silent question they conveyed was clear.
It must've been really, really bad.
Sakura's lips curved in a soft smile, reassuring, granting him what he wanted—what he needed.
He kissed her then, long and hard, and the world swayed a little.
There was a longstanding consensus in Konoha that a Nara's kiss was truly unforgettable—and Sakura had discovered that to be indisputably true. Shikamaru usually wasn't the type to make the first move—in romance and Shogi alike—but when he did, it felt like the most sacred gift, like something wrapped in silk that had been hidden away for decades from the outside world. But the kiss he shared with her tonight was the rarest of them all—the kind that seeped into her skin and had fire licking at her insides, that embraced her and pressed into her and devoured her. It was raw emotion and anger and sadness all wrapped up in the mysterious package that was Shikamaru. And Sakura considered herself the luckiest girl in Konoha to be allowed a peek into that world.
"Shika," Sakura panted when they broke for air
He didn't say anything, his fingers already tugging at her shorts. His skin was hot against hers, feverish even, his breath puffing against her mouth.
She knew what he wanted and didn't object, allowing him to strip her naked and shower her in ragged, open-mouthed kisses. His fingers slipped between her legs, shaking and impatient as they circled roughly and then dipped inside. She let out a small whimper, moving with his pace, legs spreading.
He growled as he realized how wet she was. How much she wanted him.
His fingers quickly disappeared to be replaced by the head of his cock. Sakura bit her lip, and he entered her in one sharp thrust.
" Fuck."
Sakura's head wrenched back, her vision filling with stars as her hands groped the bare muscles of his chest and back, her legs squeezing around his hips. She welcomed him in, urging him to drown his sorrows in her warmth.
He held her tightly, chest heaving with each breath. His hips snapped in jolted, needy thrusts, driving himself deep inside her, feeling every part of her. Each pulsing motion had Sakura moaning his name, and in that moment, he was the only thing in the world that mattered, the only thing she wanted.
Breathing heavily, he squeezed her breasts, grazing her nipples with the rough pads of his fingers. He wasn't gentle tonight, and she didn't expect him to be. She let him have her how he wanted.
Again, his fingers found her clit, fast and demanding. Even as worked up as he was, she knew he wouldn't let himself come before she did.
"It's okay, Shika," Sakura breathed, caressing his face. "You don't need to—"
He bit her neck to silence her, and moments later, her walls fluttered around him. She gasped and screamed and tugged at his scalp, her legs tightening, pulling him deeper inside her. The pleasure pooled and rippled low in her belly, and with a choked moan, Shikamaru tumbled with her into bliss, flooding her with streams of heat that set her body ablaze. She clenched and squeezed and spasmed, milking him to the last drop until he collapsed on top of her.
They both took a moment to catch their breath, skin flushed and sweaty, bodies entangled. Sakura felt the last twitches of his climax as he leaned down to kiss her, and she placed a palm over his pounding chest. He didn't move away, nor did she want him to. She loved feeling the sated thrum of his body against hers.
"I'm sorry," he puffed into her neck.
She blinked. "For what?"
"Jumping you like that."
"Don't be."
She pressed a hand to his cheek, and he sank into it briefly before letting out a sigh. She silently lamented the loss of him when he pulled out of her, slipping his pants back on and slowly padding toward the screen door on the opposite side of the room. She watched him collect his lighter and a cigarette before he slipped out onto the porch.
Sakura buried her face in a pillow.
Just once, she wished he would cuddle after sex.
Even so, he had left the door cracked—something she had come to learn was a silent invitation for her to join him. After getting her wits about her, Sakura slipped her clothes back on and padded outside to find him leaning on a rail, pillowy clouds of smoke rising around him in the cool night air.
"Smells like rain," she commented, sitting in a wicker chair and propping her feet up.
"Mm. It'll probably storm tonight," came his quiet response.
Sakura fell silent, listening to the rustle of the forest behind the compound and the small puffs Shikamaru took from his cigarette. The smoky, acrid tang of it surrounded her, and for once, she savored it. It meant he was here with her, safe. She could only guess what he had been through these past few days, what he had seen and done. But his walls were up tonight, so she doubted she would pry any details out of him. If he wanted to talk, he would do it of his own accord. She had learned that long ago.
Still, after all this time, she hated the distance between them. It felt like a yawning cavern that she had fallen into and couldn't climb out of. More than anything, she just wanted him to trust her. To let her in.
Deep inside, Sakura feared she was just a warm body to him. Just something to fuck when he was wound too tight. If she meant anything to him at all, was it romantic or somewhere closer to friendship? And would she be okay if she knew the answer?
The thought had pain lancing through her chest.
Why? Why couldn't he love her? Why couldn't he tell her about his day and all of the shitty, fucked up things that were swirling through his head? Why couldn't they just talk ?
It wasn't fair. Of all the people Sakura could have fallen in love with, why did it have to be Shikamaru Nara?
It just wasn't fair.
"You really should quit that, you know," she mumbled, because she couldn't say what was really on her mind. It was probably the hundredth time she had told him that, and his answer was always the same:
"I've been cutting back."
She watched him flick the metal lighter in his hand—Asuma's lighter—while his gaze stretched far off into the trees.
He was thinking about his teacher, Sakura knew. And for that reason, she also knew he would never quit smoking.
Geez, Asuma. Why couldn't you have picked a healthier habit? Sakura silently cursed the sky.
Picking aimlessly at a thread on her shorts, she let out a sigh.
"Work was long today," she hummed.
Shikamaru took another drag. His only response was a sideways glance.
"There was an old man who wouldn't stop pestering the nurses for papaya juice. No matter what they gave him, he threw it on the floor and demanded papaya juice. Do you know how hard it is to find papaya juice?"
"Pretty difficult, I imagine."
"Yeah! But this man was just going wild, so I went to all the specialty markets downtown until I found that damn papaya juice. And you know what he did when I finally got it to him?"
Shikamaru looked at her.
"He threw it at me! Told me it wasn't the right brand! Can you believe that?"
The Nara genius blinked before returning his gaze to the treeline. He didn't laugh, but Sakura thought she could see a tiny smirk on his face.
"Sounds like an interesting day."
"Yeah."
And this is when you would tell me about yours.
Of course, Sakura wasn't surprised when he didn't, but she couldn't help the budding disappointment in her chest. Just a scrap. If he could just give her a scrap, she would be happy. But Shikamaru wasn't that easy.
Silence lingered between them for several minutes until Sakura gained the nerve to speak again.
"Tsunade is hosting that gala soon. Remember? For the hospital?"
"Hm."
"It's gonna be fancy. One of those black tie affairs. I'm surprised we had it in our budget."
"The village has been doing well lately."
"Mm." Sakura pushed her feet against the railing and balanced on the back legs of her chair, idly picking at a thread on her shirt. Then she continued, "I've already picked out a dress."
"Yeah?" he hummed, sounding a little disinterested as he propped his cigarette in the corner of his mouth to smooth his hair back. His sharp features stood out in the moonlight, and Sakura cursed him for being such a handsome asshole.
"It's dark blue, strappy…shows a little leg."
His eyebrow ticked, but he otherwise didn't respond.
Sakura bit the inside of her cheek. Fine. Two can play at this game.
"You know that new intern Tsunade hired?" she began innocently. "Ryuu-san?"
Shikamaru blew another cloud of smoke. "Doesn't ring a bell."
"He's pretty tall. Sandy brown hair. Widow's peak. He's a handsome guy, really."
"Ah."
"Anyway, he asked me to go with him."
The cigarette lowered, and Sakura couldn't help the triumphant smile that graced her lips as she took in his bewildered expression.
"What?"
"To the gala. He asked me to be his date."
Shikamaru straightened, and it was almost as if the air shifted around him. Immediately, she knew she had his full attention.
"...and what was your answer?"
She shrugged.
"I said I would think about it."
Hook. Line. And sinker.
Shikamaru dropped the cigarette and crumpled it beneath his heel. Moments later, his hand was on the armrest of her chair, forcing it back down on all legs with a sharp thud. Sakura blinked up at him.
"You're not going with that guy."
"Oh?" Her lips stretched in an innocent smile. "Why not?"
Shikamaru clicked his tongue against his teeth, tugging her up from the chair by her elbows. She nearly squealed as he caged her against one of the rail posts.
"Because you're going with me."
Sakura rolled her eyes. "You said you didn't want to go."
His hands slid around her waist, possessively, and she raised her eyebrows at him. "I changed my mind," he replied.
"Shika, I'm not going to force you to do something you don't wanna do. Especially when—"
Her voice broke off. She couldn't say that . Not now.
But Shikamaru wouldn't have it.
Pressing a callused finger under her chin, he forced her to look at him.
"Especially when what?"
"Especially when…"
Sakura gulped, and he tightened his grasp. Suddenly, the world was spinning and she couldn't remember why she had started this conversation to begin with.
"Finish that sentence, Sakura."
She swore his eyes were burning a hole right through her.
"Especially when…you don't think of me like that."
Her voice came out barely above a whisper, but she could tell by the way Shikamaru flinched that he had heard every word. Instead of stepping away, as she half expected him to, he just stared at her. And then, suddenly, he let out a sigh and crumpled forward.
Huh?
She felt his nose against her neck first, and then his lips.
Was he…nuzzling her?
Silent and confused, she stood there and waited until he let out a sound. It was a bit like a bitter laugh.
"That is the stupidest thing I have ever heard."
Sakura gave a tiny squeak as he pressed into her, pinning her hands against the rough, knotted wood of the post. When she looked up at him, there was something in his eyes that bordered bloodlust, and immediately, she felt a thrill deep inside her.
Now this was a side of him she hadn't seen before.
Curling a hand in her hair, he pulled her head back to stare into her eyes. Anger radiated off him in waves, and she suddenly felt very small under his shadow.
"Sakura…I wouldn't give you the seals to my house, or walk you to work every morning, or let you redecorate my room if I didn't care about you. If I didn't—"
He broke off, and Sakura felt his grip slacken. She would ask what he was going to say but she could already see it in his eyes.
In that instant, the whole world came to a standstill.
"Shika," she murmured, eyes wandering his face. "You…?"
She didn't have to finish the question. A faint blush tainted his cheeks and he plopped a hand on top of her head to musse her hair.
"You really are a bothersome woman."
Sakura smiled, a sense of joy spreading all the way down to her toes.
He loved her. Of course he loved her. The realization was so amazing that she wondered why she had doubted it all this time. Anyone with eyes could see that he loved her.
"Shika."
Unable to contain herself, Sakura jumped on him, arms and legs wrapping tightly around his body as if he was the only thing that could support her. He let out a little grunt but caught her easily, strong arms cradling her so she could feel every ridge and muscle of his torso against hers.
Then—just because he could—he smacked her ass.
"Ow," Sakura whined. "What was that for?"
"I don't wanna hear you talk about that guy again."
Instantly, a swarm of butterflies filled her stomach.
"O-okay."
He smacked her again.
"Or any other guy for that matter."
Kami, he's really worked up.
"Okay."
He hummed in satisfaction, squeezing her so hard it hurt, but when his lips grazed her ear, she swore in that moment she was going to melt into a puddle at his feet.
"Hearing you say something like that…makes me very angry."
His breath puffed hotly against her neck, and she shivered. Damn. That was sexy.
"You're mine," he rumbled. "Got it?"
The words dripped like honey as his lips trailed down her neck to her shoulder. She whimpered when he bit the soft flesh there.
"Shika," she gasped.
She barely had time to brace herself before his palm cracked against her ass again. Pain seared through her, but she was surprised to feel a surge of pleasure as well.
Whoa .
"Maybe if I leave a mark, you won't forget," he growled.
She gulped and nodded, unable to respond as he slowly started backing through the door, one hand threaded through her hair while the other squeezed her curves. His fingers were rough and needy as his lips burned a trail of wet fire down the smooth column of her neck.
When they entered the bedroom, he dropped her onto the mattress and her pink hair sprawled around her in a messy halo. She watched, both afraid and entranced, as he loomed over her. There was a malevolent glint to his eyes that had her shivering.
Was this really the same Shikamaru she had been speaking to only minutes ago? She could barely recognize him now.
"Sakura," —he rubbed the front of her shorts with his thumb and she moaned— "you're not going to come until I tell you to."
Oh, damn.
He lowered himself down until their faces were mere inches apart, the heat of his breath fanning her lips like a soft summer breeze.
"So be a good girl and behave yourself."
Gradually, his hand smoothed under the material of her top to pinch her nipple, and she bit her lip, already tingling from his touch. Her eyes widened as he twisted and flicked the little nub, his gaze never leaving her face. Seconds later, a small keen escaped her as she felt a hand curl around her throat—it was his shadow, she realized with a start. If it were anyone else using a jutsu on her, she would've hurled them across the room. But Shikamaru…she trusted him more than he knew.
Briefly, his lips grazed hers, and she pouted at not being able to press further into the kiss—his shadow barring her from doing so. But the inconvenience was somehow worth it. Never before had Sakura's body buzzed with so much excitement.
"You like that?" he growled against her lips.
She nodded. Her voice was caught in her throat.
His mouth spread in a sadistic smirk as another shadow hand cupped and groped her breast.
"You don't know how sexy you look right now."
His praise rippled through her like waves and left a warm feeling in its wake.
Then, rising from the bed, Shikamaru pulled at the drawstrings of his pants, and Sakura watched in amazement as his cock sprang out, already swollen and weeping from his arousal. She felt something stir deep inside herself at the sight, but barely had time to process the feeling as he tugged her up by her hair. Pain seared across her scalp, briefly, but she soon forgot it as he pulled her closer.
"Get on your knees."
Sakura's cheeks heated—and so did the rest of her—at his words. He had never been so rough before. Should it have turned her on as much as it did?
Silently, she obeyed, sliding from the edge of the bed to the floor. As soon as she did, she felt his shadow grab her wrists and hold them behind her back.
Smirking callously, Shikamaru tugged on her hair again until her eyes met his. His gaze was swirling with darkness and lust, and just behind that she could see a glimmer of excitement.
He was enjoying this just as much as she was.
"Be a good girl and suck my cock."
She moaned as he ghosted his swollen head over her lips, and she answered without thinking, allowing herself a small taste.
The heat in his eyes flared, and he let out a groan.
"Yeah, like that. Stick your tongue out."
Staring up at him under pink lashes, she did as he asked, moaning as he pressed his length between her lips. She kept her tongue flat and licked the underside of his head, the spot between her legs already dripping with desire. She could feel his shadow's hands tighten around her wrists as Shikamaru enjoyed her ministrations.
"Mm, that's it," —his fingers twisted in her hair, and he pushed himself deeper into her mouth. "That's it, Sakura."
Sakura couldn't believe how turned on she was.
Continuing to pull her hair, Shikamaru thrusted into her throat and brought tears to her eyes, but the heat in her body only intensified.
Sakura moaned and took him in all at once. Gripping the back of her head, he bucked into her, rough and needy, and she gagged around his girth, tasting the saltiness of precum.
God, he was so hard.
And she was so wet, she found, as her fingers traveled to the apex of her thighs and began to rub tiny circles there. She started to sink them further until, suddenly, Shikamaru yanked on her hair again. She stared up at him through teary eyes.
"What are you doing?" he snapped.
Before she could answer, his shadow wrapped around her and hoisted her back. The room spun like a whirlpool.
Shikamaru's eyes burned with animalistic need as he loomed over her. "I'm the only one who can touch you, got it?"
"I'm sorry," Sakura squeaked.
Almost as soon as it had appeared, the fire in his gaze softened, and he leaned down to caress her cheek with a calloused palm.
She let out a startled breath as his shadow pulled her toward the dresser, and obediently, she perched herself on the edge. The dark shape wrapped around her tightly while, in one smooth motion, Shikamaru wrenched her shorts off and knelt before her.
Sakura stared at him in anticipation, chest heaving. His eyes roved over her, glittering wolfishly, and she suddenly realized how vulnerable she was in that moment.
She squirmed against his shadow as Shikamaru reached out to pinch and rub her nipples. They were so sensitive tonight, and she felt them pebble against his touch in seconds. Shikamaru licked his lips as his hand curled around his cock. He gave it one long pump and groaned. At the same time, his shadow yanked her panties aside, and with that, Shikamaru nestled his mouth between her legs.
"Mm, Shika…"
Gently, he lapped and sucked on her sensitive flesh while Sakura watched his fist pump up and down his cock. She trembled from the sensations of his shadow teasing and caressing her, her small whimpers drawing deep, masculine moans from the man.
When her skin became drenched in his saliva, her legs trembling, Sakura bucked against Shikamaru's mouth, earning her a ragged growl that set her blood on fire. The more she squirmed and whined, the faster and harder his tongue moved. It seemed everything she did excited him.
After only a few short moments, she could feel the tension building. Not only was Shikamaru teasing and edging her, but his shadow's touch sent shivers up and down her spine. It was as if he knew exactly what she wanted, which he proved when he started tracing his tongue up and down her slit, penetrating her between slow, deliberate licks. Sakura couldn't stop herself from crying out; it was so loud she was sure the whole village could hear, but at this point, it was beyond her control.
Shikamaru, however, clearly had no such concerns. If anything, he wanted Sakura to be as loud as possible, if his reaction to the sound was any sign. Hotly, his eyes flashed as he glanced up at her, his face wrought with satisfaction. Instantly, Sakura felt his shadow's fingers smoothing down her thigh, and she clenched her jaw when she felt them slowly slide into her. In tandem, Shika's mouth continued its sensuous treatment of her clit, and Sakura's eyes squeezed shut, her toes curling and her fingers wrapping around the edge of the dresser.
Just a bit further…
In a sudden burst of ecstasy, Sakura screamed Shika's name and clamped down, her entire body shaking.
"Mm, yes, baby. Come for me," he growled. "Come, Sakura."
He worked her hard and fast as she threw her head back and whimpered, her release coiling through her like a flaming, twisting serpent. It was easily the most intense orgasm Shikamaru had ever given her.
When she finally came down from her high, she found him leaning over her, his shadow retreating. He didn't give her much time to recover before he plunged his tongue into her mouth. He tasted of ash and sake and rain, and Sakura reveled in it. The more he lapped and sucked at her lips, the more aroused she became, and it seemed Shikamaru finally lost some of his restraint as he grabbed her by the hips and yanked her closer to him. His kisses turned sloppy and wild until Sakura became drunk on the myriad of sensation, her lips bruised and swollen. She couldn't believe how easy it was for Shika to completely devour her until all other thoughts flew from her brain, until it was just the two of them and nothing else mattered. She could have spent the entire night just like this, kissing the most amazing man in the world.
But it was only after a short moment that the Nara's composure finally snapped, and Sakura felt something hard push between her legs.
"Oh, god," she panted. She didn't know if she could take him after such a big orgasm.
But when Shikamaru gripped her tightly and slid into her, inch by inch, she realized she had a lot more to give.
Shaking against him, and still incredibly sensitive, Sakura accepted his first long thrust with a high-pitched cry. A current of pleasure shot through her like lightning, and as her body throbbed and pulsed around him, Shikamaru let out a muffled moan.
"Fuck, baby, you're so tight."
"Mm, faster, Shika. Faster," she begged.
Digging his fingers into her thighs, he obliged, plucking her completely off the dresser and sliding her down on his cock with a violent thrust. When Sakura let out a sound of praise, he repeated the motion again and again until they were locked in a heated, passionate rhythm that had them both shouting cries of euphoria. Soon enough, she could feel herself dripping down his thighs. They locked gazes, and Sakura wound her arms around his neck for support, moving in tandem with each powerful drive.
"You feel so fucking good, Sakura," Shikamaru panted, the loud smack of their drenched flesh punctuating his words. Sakura could feel bruises forming where his fingers dug into her skin, and the thought only made her more desperate and flustered for him. It wasn't much longer before she felt another string of tension building inside her.
"Shika—I'm—I'm going to come again," Sakura puffed suddenly.
He growled in encouragement. "God, yes, baby. Do it."
Her grip tightening on his shoulders, she clenched her jaw and ground down on him, squeezing his cock so tight he let out a curse.
"Oh, fuck ."
Sakura locked gazes with Shikamaru as she fell apart, her hands fisting into his spiky brown mane, and immediately, that became his undoing.
"Ah, fuck. Fuck. "
With a harsh grunt, he grabbed her ass, rutting into her while she shouted his name, his cock flexing and pulsing as his release seized him in powerful waves. Then, when his orgasm subsided, he set her back down on the dresser and rested his forehead against hers.
Sakura giggled breathlessly, suddenly light as a feather. She pushed the dark strands of hair out of his face and kissed him. "That was so good."
Shikamaru gently grazed his lips over hers, the fire in his gaze now replaced by something softer.
"I really can't control myself with you."
Sakura smiled. "Good."
After a moment, Shikamaru withdrew to fetch her a towel to clean up, and then they went to bed together. As Sakura cuddled up against him and Shikamaru wrapped his arms around her, she placed a hand on his chest to feel his heartbeat, steady and strong beneath her fingertips, and let out a sigh.
"I guess I should make you jealous more often," she remarked.
Though she didn't look at him, she could hear a frown in his voice. "You better not."
"Alright, alright." With an amused hum, she nestled closer to him, and they remained comfortably silent for a few more minutes.
Then another thought entered her mind.
"You know…if you're going to the gala with me, you'll have to buy a suit."
Shikamaru mumbled something into her hair, but the only word she could make out was a muffled 'bothersome' before he kissed the top of her head and told her to get some rest. Too tired to come up with a snappy retort, she decided to let the matter go, and within minutes, they both drifted off to sleep.