Double Promise

Episode tag to 'Double Jeopardy'

Team night seems like the right thing to do after basically dying today. Well, for once, they didn't die, but clone-SG1 did. Sam has to admit that it's weird to watch yourself die. They all must have felt that way. Suddenly reminded of their mortality. So here they are, at the Colonel's house.

Teal'c has retreated to the kitchen, making 'dessert', and no one is allowed to interrupt. He's become quite serious about cooking lately, and Sam muses if it has anything to do with his fishing trip with Colonel O'Neill and the amounts of charred meat or fish they must have consumed. Daniel is on the phone with an old colleague of his. An archaeology professor who's just discovered something in Egypt. Sam is astonished about the excitement Daniel can show for a discovery that—in the greater scheme of things aka knowing about the Stargate—seems pretty insignificant. And yet he's been on the phone for the past thirty minutes and sounds genuinely thrilled. Maybe it's just her because San definitely got a bit snobby when it comes to the results of her colleagues, given all the new technology she has to play around with.

With Daniel on the phone and Teal'c in the kitchen, it leaves Colonel O'Neill and Sam in his backyard. The campfire radiates off a pleasant warmth and dances on the Colonel's face. For the first time, she notices how his face has changed since the day they met. Even though they've been through painful experiences, Earth-threatening events, and fought the cruelest enemies, his face is softer now. Calm almost.

He must have noticed her eyes on him because he looks up with a soft smile around his eyes.

"Isn't it strange how normal all this weirdness has become," he says and once again seems to be able to read her thoughts. Sam doesn't linger too long on this realization because it's just going to take her down the forbidden path to the room she doesn't want to visit tonight.

"Yeah. We just watched our perfect clones die."

"Not that perfect. They died, and so far, we've always avoided this," the Colonel answers and then hesitates for a moment. There's a flinch on his face, and now she knows what he's thinking. Only two months ago, he had killed her. Shot her twice with a Zat to stop the entity from infiltrating the base and destroying Earth. It's another thought Sam doesn't want to entertain, and it seems he doesn't want to go there either because he continues, "We should have trained them better."

She lifts her eyebrows in a question.

"They could have done our jobs. Saved the world, defeated the Goa'Uld, and the Replicators once they're at it."

"And what would we do?" Sam asks, and the moment the words cross her lips, she regrets it. If their heads are in sync tonight, she knows his answer, and it's leading towards the room.

"Fishing?"

She huffs and takes a swig from her beer.

"I would know what I to do if the war were over." His voice is low and somehow raspy, and in combination with his words, sends a flutter to her stomach. It takes her a moment to find the courage to look up, and when she does so, his eyes are on her. Soft and warm and—she takes a deep breath—loving. Sam wants to believe she understands it all wrong. That he is not talking about a future for him and her, but she knows he is. Against all the voices in her head that yell at her to shut up, she says, "Me too."

The moment little smile tugs on his lips, the voices drown out, and all she can hear is the rush of her blood.

"Maybe one day," he says without letting her eyes go.

Uncertainty has never been so certain. A 'maybe' never so committed. Sam swallows, but that big lump in her throat won't go away. One day, she thinks, and it's more than a nice thought. It's the silver lining, the ultimate goal, what makes all of the holdings back and suffocating feelings worth it.

"Sam, Jack! Teal'c is ready," Daniel yells, and their moment is broken. They get up and stroll towards the warmly illuminated house when he says with a wicked grin, "You know I would have kicked his ass."

His ability to easily juggle emotions and bring her back to the here and now makes Sam smile and leads her to—though she resists conscious countenancing of it—loving him even more.

Autor's note: As always. I'd love to hear what you think. Especially because I'm trying to stay close to the show and don't want to change the narrative of what actually happened. So I would love to hear if you think something like that could have happened. Thanks for reading.