A/N: Thank you for reading, the end (-:
iv.
Gaara shrugged on a thin jacket before leaving his apartment and crossing the street to the old building where Naruto lived. He didn't think twice about what he was doing as he climbed the stairs to the second floor or when he approached Naruto, leaning against the threshold of his open front door. "Still can't sleep, huh?" Naruto greeted with a warmth to his tone.
"About as much as you, apparently." Gaara replied with a smile. Naruto stepped aside and beckoned Gaara in. The redhead entered the room and looked around curiously. Unlike his own apartment, Naruto's contained many more touches of his own. The walls were decorated with an assortment of pictures and posters, trinkets sat upon undusted shelves along with various books that looked as if they'd hardly been touched. He had a pile of dirty laundry in the corner of his room and his bed against the wall was rumpled with mismatched pillowcases. Naruto closed the door behind him and gave a nervous laugh as he watched Gaara take it all in.
"Sorry about the mess, I don't usually have people over." Gaara turned to look over his shoulder and shook his head.
"No, it's fine. I don't mind at all." In fact, he kind of liked it. It was so unlike Gaara's own approach to comfort and if his own apartment had looked this way he'd probably feel uncomfortable. But this was different somehow, this felt like Naruto, unapologetically present and unchanged. Naruto shyly slunk towards the kitchen, with his hand on the back of his neck he shrugged towards the side room.
"Would you like some tea? I was just boiling a pot."
"Sure," Gaara said, and followed Naruto into the small kitchen.
"All I've got is chamomile, do you mind?" Gaara shook his head and watched as Naruto prepared the herbal drink. "I was hoping this would help put me to sleep, I'm not much of a tea drinker but Sakura told me this might help."
"At the least, you might find yourself more relaxed," Gaara added on. "Are you sure I won't be keeping you awake?" Naruto snapped his head upwards and shook it.
"No!" He withdrew a bit and a slight flush colored his skin. "Err, I mean, I'm not really tired at all, you know. I'm glad you were awake too." He returned to focusing on the tea, looking a little embarrassed at his immediate answer. Gaara didn't say anything but he observed with interest as Naruto poured the water in the two cups. His hands were lightly shaking. Remembering the look Naruto had worn before he'd seen Gaara; the redhead frowned a little and turned his attention to Naruto's face. He looked incredibly tired now that he was getting a closer look. Naruto put the kettle back on the stovetop and then carefully handed the cup to Gaara. "I'm sorry, I put too much water in it."
"It's fine," Gaara reassured. The cup of tea quickly warmed his hands and that alone made him feel soothed.
Naruto's apartment was a small studio space, the main room comfortably filled with a twin bed, a short futon, and a dresser on which a compact television sat upon. The television was playing something but the volume was so low it acted merely as background sound. They sat on the futon with their backs each up against an arm so that they could see each other. Naruto blew gently at his cup of tea, his eyes out of focus as he watched the ripples move. Gaara sensed that something was wrong but he wasn't entirely sure how to approach it. Was this something he was supposed to ask about? Would Naruto feel uncomfortable or interpret Gaara's concern as prying? He'd never done anything like this before, but he wanted to. Gaara cleared his throat before speaking.
"Forgive me if I'm out of line for asking," he began and Naruto looked up with his brows knit together. "Is there something bothering you?" Naruto looked a little surprised as he processed the question but then relaxed and looked at the ceiling.
"That obvious, huh?"
"Not entirely," Gaara admitted a little sheepishly. "There was something in your expression when I saw you from my balcony, please correct me if I'm wrong, I don't mean to assume." He tacked on thoughtfully. Naruto's gaze settled back on Gaara and he studied him for a moment before looking back down, somewhat disheartened.
"What is it that you thought you saw?" He asked gently.
Gaara considered his next words carefully. "You seemed…half-empty." This description felt right and Naruto stilled, urging Gaara to continue. "It's almost as if while most of you is present, there's another part of you that's elsewhere, and you're not sure where it's at or when it left." These were all things he felt on those nights he found himself feeling detached from the rest of the world. It wasn't always rooted in loneliness, some nights he just felt incomplete in one way or another. Naruto was now staring at him, his mouth parted slightly.
"Yeah, that's pretty spot on actually." Naruto said. He sat up and leaned in closer to Gaara, his eyes intense. "You could tell all of that from just one look?"
"I speak from my own experiences," Gaara said gently. "I know that expression well; I've seen it on myself quite a number of times."
This seemed to bring Naruto to a stop as he considered Gaara's words. He leaned back into the arm of the futon and looked into his cup of chamomile tea. Finally he spoke. "It's been a while since I've felt this way," he admitted in a moment of unashamed vulnerability. "Not since I was a kid. Back then I felt it almost all the time. I thought that if I tried hard enough to make friends and be accepted by others, it would go away. And I mean, it did, for a while. But recently I've been feeling that same emptiness, and now I'm constantly unsure of myself and I wonder if my friends really like me for me." He looked into Gaara's expression almost desperately. Gaara felt his body go slack and a look of deep sympathy crossed his boyish features.
"I know what you mean," Gaara admitted honestly. There was nothing held back in his words, he meant it all. "I wish I could tell you how to make it stop for good, but I still don't know the answer to that myself. When I met you, there was something in you that I identified with." Gaara broke eye contact and looked off timidly. "You were so different from me that I couldn't understand what drew me to you, but I think I understand now. You have the same feelings I do..." A sudden touch startled him and he looked down to see Naruto's hand gently resting on his. It was such a simple gesture but the heat radiating off of Naruto's touch seemed to fill him up. It eased his nerves and a new emotion overcame him, something sweet and kind. Naruto looked at him firmly, determined even.
"I thought so too," he said and then he grinned. "Maybe all this time the thing we've been missing was each other!" Naruto laughed as Gaara blushed at his words and the blonde pulled back and took a deep breath. "But I mean it, when I'm around you I don't feel that way. And just knowing that there's still so much more to learn about you, it gives me a lot of hope."
"Me too," Gaara said in hushed tones. "I'm happy I met you."
They spent a while longer talking about their shared experiences, about Naruto's earliest memories being of the orphanage he'd grown up in and Gaara having been blamed by his family for his mother's death. They spoke about their reactions to these things, Gaara's antisocial behavior and Naruto's tendency to stir trouble for attention and ultimately the shift they'd experienced when the decided they wanted something more than all of that. It was a cathartic experience for the both of them and Gaara felt a kinship that he'd never thought possible. All of his defenses had lowered and there he was, so open and vulnerable that he'd allowed himself to fall asleep on Naruto's shoulder at some point in the night.
Gaara felt stiff as he slowly awakened, squinting at the morning light that drifted in through the windows. Besides him Naruto softly mumbled in his sleep, his head thrown back and resting on the back of the futon. By their feet sat two nearly full cups of chamomile tea.
Carefully, Gaara pulled himself upright. He rubbed at his eyes and then looked around the room for a clock. On the other side of the room on Naruto's nightstand was a fluorescent clock. It read 8:50 AM, they'd nearly missed their first class of the day. He looked over at Naruto and then down at himself. Even if he wanted to leave for class now he was so unkempt that by the time he'd gotten ready he'd probably miss his second class too. With a sigh he leaned back against the futon. He turned his head and watched the blonde as he slept, he also didn't want to wake Naruto just yet but it was unavoidable if they were going to ever get to school, but…a few more minutes couldn't hurt.
Naruto woke with a start and blearily looked around. "Where am I?" He muttered as he sat upright. His hand flew to his neck, it was aching. Gaara stepped out of the kitchen having washed the tea cups from the night before.
"We fell asleep there last night," he said. Naruto squinted at the clock and then jumped up, startled.
"It's almost ten!"
"I only just woke up as well," Gaara said nonchalantly as he leaned against the doorway. "Besides, there's no point going to class if you're too tired to learn, your body must have needed it." Naruto took a deep breath and then relaxed, looking relieved Gaara wasn't upset they'd slept so long. "If you're lost in your coursework, I can help you. I've taken the equivalent to most of these classes my last year at university."
"Oh man, that'd help a lot. Two days in and I've already got no idea what they're talking about." Naruto admitted sheepishly. Gaara smiled, a real one.
"I'm going to shower and get ready, if we leave in the next twenty minutes we might make it in time for our third class."
"Right," Naruto said with a grin. "I don't even need twenty minutes. Just you wait, I'll be the one waiting on you this time!"
"We'll see about that," Gaara replied coolly. He walked towards the door and turned before opening it, "see you in ten then." And with a smirk, opened the door and walked out. He could hear Naruto rushing to the shower as he left. Gaara didn't need much time to get ready, he was never one to bother with styling his hair and choosing an outfit was a basic task thanks to his minimalist wardrobe. When he finished, he grabbed his bag off the back of his door and locked up his apartment when he left. He stopped for a moment at the top of his stairs when he saw Naruto standing at the corner, looking up at him with that cheeky smile of his. Gaara felt a swell of affection and didn't resist the smile spread across his face.
It seemed unpredictable wasn't always a bad thing to be.