Discovering Hope

by Gavin Tyson

He was different to his kind, he never grew hungry, he never ate, he just watched. He was a titan, but what was a titan that would not eat? What was a titan that would just simply watch? He didn't know... but then he watched something he couldn't abide. And finally; this strange titan had finally moved! (Story of a titan from outside the walls finding something to fight for)

4. chapter 4 The Year they Spent Part 2

Chapter 4: The Year they Spent. Part 2

Inspired by RedCoaster's "Rogue"

A/N: Soooooo, this took a lot longer than I thought it would, and some to you are probably (and understandably) disappointed with the length of this chapter, especially after how long it took. Especially since what was originally going to be only a 2 chapter arc has turned into a 4 parter. I think 4 at least. Not much else to say besides an apology for taking so damn long to update, but I do hope the titan fluff in this chapter treats you well, and I hope you enjoy it overall. Please let me know what you think.

Ps. Initially, this was a longer chapter, but I decided to split it in two, otherwise it'd be over 15000 words long.

The Seventh month…

He had noticed something rather off putting; Ymir stunk, stunk really terribly, he had begun to pick up this irritating smell a while ago but could never accurately place it, but now, as he held Ymir close to his chest as they slept his nose had finally found the origin to that god-awful smell, it then occurred to him that perhaps Ymir had not been taking care of her hygiene as he had been doing so, (unlike the rest of his kind that stunk of gore, Ymir stunk of unwashed skin). He made sure to have at least a wash in the nearby lake once in a while, he always assumed Ymir washed at a seperate time, but according to the horrid smell?

She hadn't been doing so. He'd have to fix that.

In the morning, he was too tired right now.

Later…

"Wheeere wheee ghoooin?" questioned Ymir, perched as always upon his shoulders, in response he pointed ahead of him; a large clearing where a large lake lay. As Ymir's eyes caught sight of it he felt her tense up, which only further confused him, what was she tense about? The water? Why would she? It wasn't deep enough to drown her, it barely even reached his shins and he had to lie back to get a full wash. However, he continued onwards, fully aware of the ever constant tensioning his companion was going through. They reached the lakes edge and he lowered himself to his knees and glanced at Ymir, whose eyes were still wide open in abject fear.

What's wrong?

Carefully, as to not scare her, he brought his large hand up to her face and ever so gently stroked her cheek with his thumb, her eyes shooting to him with his contact, and he could read so many different things in those giant expressive eyes.

Fear, worry, concern, joy, happiness, anxiousness. All of those conflicting emotions flowed from her eyes into his, and all he wanted to do was find out why, and help her overcome it. Still, with the care that only he could have, he picked her up from his shoulders and placed her next to him on the edge of the water like him, whilst doing so he pulled his legs from under him and dipped them into the lake, always enjoying the feeling of his feet in the water. But he couldn't enjoy it now, right now his entire focus was on his 'frozen' friend. He stroked her cheek yet again, and when her eyes met his, he asked his question; not through writing or his mediocre speech, but instead through his eyes, he put as much concern and care as he could into his gaze, and aimed it towards the much smaller titan, hoping that she could 'see' his utter care for her.

What was wrong?

She didn't respond for a while, simply continued to stare at him, until she carefully took one of her bony fingers and began to write into the muddy ground below.

Bad memories…

It was disconcertingly vague, he could not deny that, but it was all he needed to know, she once had a terrible experience with water. But how and when? Not since they met, he was sure about that, and during those 60 years of being mindless, he doubted it happened then either. So when? That's when his mind filled in the blanks;

Could it have been before the 60 years of mindless wondering? But… what would have been before that? Ymir; just who are you?

He was dying to know, but he'd never ask, unless Ymir wanted to tell him, he'd never probe for it, because he cared for her and only wanted what was best for her, nothing less, nothing more. Anyway, he had an issue to deal with already, to help Ymir overcome her fear. He thought for a moment before a plan came to the forefront of his mind. He pushed himself into the water, splashing it almost everywhere, and waited for it to calm down before getting down onto his knees yet again, the water barely peeking above his legs. He gazed into Ymir's eyes once more;

"Trhuust mehh?"

He outstretched one of his large hands and held it there, waiting on Ymir to make her decision, she could either take his hand, or stay on the shore, it wouldn't change his opinion of her either way, she would always be his most precious friend. However, when he saw her shaking hand reaching for his, he wouldn't say that he wasn't happier for it and that he wasn't smiling like a buffon at that moment. When Ymir's hand met his, he began to gently hoist her up, over the lake and gently onto his lap, which poked just above the calm water, Ymir immediately digging her bony fingers into his flesh when she realised just how close she was to the water. He ignored the small stings in favour of watching her, how she glanced everywhere around her, steam rising of her in anxiousness and how her bony fingers ever so slowly began to release their death-grip.

They stayed there for a while, his hands keeping her nervous form steady as she slowly grew more relaxed. Once he felt she had calmed enough, he took one of his hands away and cupped a palm full of water, and brought it up to Ymir, he held it at her eye-level, as if asking if it was okay. Her response was a barely noticeable nod, so he brought his hand just above her head and was about to tip it over.

"Whait!"

He stopped, what happened!? Did she change her mind?

He watched as Ymir tentatively grabbed her blue neckerchief and carefully untied it, before balling it up and chucking it over to the shore, she looked up at him and grinned cheekily, as if saying; "well I don't want to get my gift wet you moron!" He smiled back and tipped his palm downwards.

Ymir would never admit it, but the water had felt good, really good, she was still terrified by the stuff, but when she was with him, she felt as if she could overcome almost anything, it was just his ability to worm his way into your heart that made him so precious to her.

Later…

Bath-time finished a while ago, and all they did was sit at the edge of the lake, and watch the sun begin to set. It was… beautiful to him, so very beautiful. Such a contrast between the suns overbearing grace and the ghastly sight of any titan, it just reaffirmed his opinion that the world was both so very wonderful, and so very dreadful; at the same time. It was just like him in a bizarre way; his visage was that of a disgusting monster, capable of tearing flesh apart like nothing, and yet he was capable of such kindness and caring for others, a caring monster; truly a contradiction if he had ever known one. But he could ponder at a later date, for now, it was getting close to heading back to their abode, he turned to Ymir and stalled when he witnessed her; she was curled up into his right side, sleeping peacefully, both of her lanky arms wrapped around his right hand. It was so… so…

His mind failed to claim the correct word for this feeling, the only possible way he could explain was that it just felt… right? In this disfigured world filled with death and decay around every corner, right now, right here with Ymir sleeping peacefully next to him? It just felt right to him, as if all of his constant worries and fears no longer held any weight in his mind. It was foolish of him to think so, and sooner or later he'd have to come back to the reality he lived in. But for right now? He would enjoy this moment for all it was worth. With his other hand, he gently stroked his dear friends cheek, taking sweet satisfaction in how Ymir's unconscious form tried to snuggle closer to him at the contact. That's when he noticed Ymir bare neck, and it occurred to him that she had not put her neckerchief back on. But if she wasn't wearing it, where was it? His eyes left his sleeping friends form and scanned the general vicinity of the lake. It was no longer where she had thrown it before her wash, but he did manage to pick up small hoofed tracks close to where it was, leading into the forest.

He mentally debated for a moment, before he carefully detached himself from Ymir and quietly followed said tracks. From what he could tell, the tracks were deer-like, but what would deer want with Ymir's neckerchief? He shrugged, he'd find out soon enough he supposed.

He followed the track for a while until he came across a small clearing, where he found Ymir's neckerchief caught against a very low hanging tree-branch, maybe the deer that took it got it caught onto the branch as it was moving? It was his best guess, but he wouldn't look a gift horse in the mouth and quickly retrieved the cloth, there was a tiny tear in it from catching itself on the branch, but otherwise it was fine. Objective complete he turned back to Ymir's direction and was utterly shocked at how dark it had suddenly gotten, how long had he spent tracking the neckerchief down? His only saving grace was that no titans would be active right now, and then he realised; what if titans had found Ymir whilst he had been away? A deep seated fear grasped his chest and before he knew it, he was shooting through the threes, pivoting around trunks and ducking underneath branches.

He had been such an utter moron! How could he just leave Ymir unattended like that!? Her neckerchief could be replaced; she couldn't!

It took him much shorter to return to Ymir due to the sheer speed he was moving at, the earth shook beneath each pounding step. And when he finally reached the clearing, he found himself letting out the deepest breath of relief he had ever had before, Ymir was exactly where he had left her… safe. He quickly moved over to her and gently hoisted her up into his arms, clutched against his chest like the most precious thing in the world. During her movement, she must've woken up, something that was incredibly hard for Ymir to actually do when night fell, he had discovered that whilst she was subject to the need to 'rest' at night like every other titan, her need to was not as bad as a standard titans was.

She looked up at him, obviously disorientated with where she was. But when she saw his bright caring eyes, she quickly smiled up to him and tried to climb upon his shoulders. But not before he presented her neckerchief to her, to which she quickly tied it back around her neck. Satisfied Ymir was safe and sound, he began the rather short journey back to their abode, content with the familiar feeling of Ymir's weight on his shoulders.

Later

Something was wrong… he was about half way back to their den, and all that was around them was the utter quietness of the forest around them, but that was exactly what was wrong; where were the noises of crickets? The last chirpings of birds before they slept, the sound of insects going about their lives.

Where were the sleeping titans!?

Something was very, very wrong. He glanced up to Ymir who herself, was scanning the surrounding area furiously, it seemed like he wasn't the only one who felt something was incredibly wrong. He was tense now, waiting for something, anything to happen, he knew that he should be safe right now, it was fully night-time now, no regular titans would be wondering about. That's when he felt it, he felt it before he saw it. The strong vibrations in the ground, similar vibration to when he walked.

Something was coming.

Something big.

He stopped dead, Ymir also looking towards where the vibrations were coming from as well.

Fur.

His large eyes bore witness to the sight of a terrifying yet familiar image; the furry titan, which stood taller than even himself. And it was casually strolling across the dirt path they were heading down. He didn't hesitate to rotate on his right heel and hide behind one of the many humongous trees that filled the forest. Ymir's mouth began to open but he quickly covered it, and placed his forefinger against his lips in a 'shhhh' gesture. She thankfully understood as she nodded fearfully. Having never seen her best friend look so worried before she was understandably concerned about that furry titan.

He waited with baited breath as the footsteps drew ever closer, his eyes beginning to dilate in worry.

It was the same titan from before the walls, the one who had killed that fleeing girl... Sarah if he recalled correctly, and whilst the memory of it brought a deep seated rage within him to life, he hadn't been aware of the size difference between the two, whilst he stood above almost all of his kind at a staggering 15 metres, the furry titan stood even higher than him and was easily stronger looking, it's broad chest and shoulders considerably beefier than his own. He wanted to sprint around this tree and tear the monster apart, he wanted to get revenge for that poor little one from when he watched.

But he couldn't; not without putting himself at great risk… and worst of all; putting Ymir at great risk. He just couldn't risk attacking such an unknown opponent when he had so much to lose. And what happened next just reaffirmed his decision to hide.

"Hmmmm… I could of sworn…"

Both hiding titans froze in fear at the deep bass voice that rumbled through the forest, and he suddenly realised just how special this furred titan truly was, even he and Ymir who could talk, were nowhere near as proficient as the furred one, and who knew what else it was capable of.

He only hoped that he could stay hidden from the furred one.

The vibrations through the ground drew ever closer, and he could practically hear the dangerous titan breathing down his neck. It was going past their hiding spot, he realised.

They could still get out of this situation with no incident, he just had to time this perfectly. He was aware that he simply couldn't sneak away, his large form would produce similar vibrations through the ground, but he couldn't stay where he was, as the furred titan would obviously see them on it's way past. So instead, a crazy idea formed in his mind. He could only hope it bore success. But for his idea to work, he had to time it just right, he couldn't be a second late or early. The thumping got louder and closer, until it was literally another step from seeing them, and as the furred titan brought it's foot down; so did he, and circled around the tree, hiding his and Ymir's form from view.

He had timed his step with the furred Titan's, thus hiding his own vibrations with the ones from their large threat. And now knowing that such a thing was possible, he had to do it again, so he did.

And again.

And again.

And again.

He did it until the furred titan vibrations had once again faded into the distance and he had lost sight of the towering monster. However, he didn't relax just yet, he carefully (and as quietly as he could) headed towards their cave. Determined to be as quiet as possible to avoid detection, and from Ymir's utter silence, she was doing the same. The silence continued for a few more minutes, until he let out a breath he hasn't realised he kept, a large cloud of steam spewing from his maw. Ymir quickly followed suit. And he felt the sharp fingers pressed into his shoulder lax slightly.

"Whhhhat wuuuus thhhhhht?"

He debated telling her he had seen that creature before, but ultimately figured it wasn't that important, it hadn't been like he did anything the first time he witnessed that thing. But that titans presence did bring up some major concerns; if the furred one was here, was the female one as well? What about the armoured and colossal one? Well the colossal one was obviously not here, they would've seen it's COLOSSAL frame. But that didn't discount the other ones. And suddenly, their home felt all the more dangerous.

"Dhoooont noooooo. But naoooo ohnnn, wheeeee sthiiik together… tooooo dhaingurus!"

Ymir grunted in agreement, the thought of coming across that beast titan on her lonesome terrified her, up until now, she had seen her friend as the apex predator in this forest, but if that beast decided to stick around… that claim could end up being contested, and the thought of him in such danger scared the smaller titan. So she made an internal promise to herself, if he ever ended up having to fight that beast, she would fight right along with him, no exceptions. She swayed with the movements of his shoulder where she was perched, and glanced at the bigger titan who was craning his neck back and forth, eyes scanning the environment for danger. And she quickly followed suit.

Something told them that their sleep would be troubled tonight.

The eighth month…

During this month, both he and Ymir had been extremely vigilant, eyes and ears always peeled for that beast titan, Ymir initially wanted nothing more than for them to stay in their cave where it was safe, but he quickly grew restless and pleaded for them to at least go on quick walks. She had acquiesced and the pair had tentatively gone about their usual doings. Scouring for mindless titans in their territory, and slaughtering them, they held back on their games; hide and seek for fear of bumping into the beast. But as the month came and went, and with not a single shred of evidence that the beast remained in their territory, the pair began to relax on their constant vigilance, and allowed their worries and fears to fade away.

Unfortunately, if he had known what was going to happen… he wouldn't of.

Later

It was rather late in the day, he began to notice that the sun was setting earlier than before which usually signified the changing of the seasons, so he was beginning to expect much colder climates, and perhaps even the fall of the white blanket he had witnessed many a time. Thankfully, being titans, the cold never bothered them anyway, their internal overwhelming heat and steam kept them warm enough in any weather. He honestly couldn't wait for the blanket to fall, before he began to move, he had always wanted to play in the whiteness, but merely watched like always… the thought of his first winter being in control made him shiver in excitement, the first thing he would do would be to grab a massive handful and pour it over Ymir, he would laugh, she was screech at him and throw some back, and they would spend the entire day having fun.

Even the image of it made him happy.

And as he leaned back into the soft grass below, the setting sun peeking through the many trees around him, he felt his eyes grow heavy… it was probably dangerous but he just wanted to take a short nap, with the rays of sunshine crashing down on him. It made him feel… good, an inellegent way of putting it, but he wasn't exactly a wordsmith now. And with Ymir hanging from a tree branch nearby, and against his better judgment, he submerged into his nap.

He would come to regret doing so.

Later

He awoke to see the sun even lower than before. He stretched his massive form as his senses returned to him, and the first thing he noticed was the lack of Ymir nearby. He shot up and swerved his head around, and when he didn't find her, his concern grew.

"Yhmeer?"

No response, so he stood up and tried to look for any tracks, footsteps, scratches in tree bark from Ymir's swinging, perhaps broken tree branches?

He found nothing obvious out of place. Maybe she's gone back to the cave? He shook his head, she wouldn't leave him alone and vulnerable like that, he knew how protective she was over him, if anything she would've slapped him awake if she wanted to leave. He turned back to where he had last seen her, hanging from a tree branch above his resting form. His face reached just beneath the high branch, his perceptive eyes noting the nail grooves in the branch, and as he inspected her last known location, his eyes caught a glimpse of blue. He craned his neck to spot what it was and froze when he fully caught it.

It was a scrap of Ymir's neckerchief, torn off from what he could tell. And close to it, he spotted another horrifying thing; a small splatter of blood on a nearby tree. And as he began to seriously panic, his heightened ears picked up roars off in the distance, and the familiar screech of his small friend.

And without hesitation, he exploded forth, earth cracking beneath his pounding feet, his massive form blitzing through the forest, he hopped over logs and even plowed right through some obstacles.

He was an idiot, such a massive idiot! Having a nap outside the safety of their cave, how braindead could he be!? Ymir had probably tried to wake him, but they both knew, when he went to sleep, nothing short of being dismembered would wake him prematurely, so if the titans had stumbled across them, then Ymir would be led them away to keep him safe. His damned wanting to relax after such a stressful month had cost him… he only hoped it didn't cost too much.

Please be okay Ymir… I'm almost there.

He could clearly hear the sounds of a struggle now, the sounds of flesh being torn and groans of pain reverberating through the air. He was only thankful none of those groans were Ymir's. He pivoted around a corner and bore witness to a brutal slaughter.

Ymir was up against a large group of titans of varying sizes, and she was skillfully ducking and dodging from flimsy grabs attempts, and swiftly tearing and slicing her opponents napes. And for a moment he watched in amazement, he had spent so much time with the smaller titan that he had honestly underestimated her combat ability. But he couldn't just wait and watch like a moron forever and stepped forward to help her out.

"It seems I was right to set up this little meeting".

He stopped dead in his tracks at that terrifying voice, however he wasn't the only one, everyone had stopped, Ymir stopped dead at the voice, so did the mindless titans, all blankly staring forward, as if standing to attention. And from the shadows of the trees, out came the beast titan in all of its horrifying glory. A sickeningly sweet grin on it's disturbing face. It's towering frame stopped in-front of him, eyes staring straight at him.

"I must say… whilst I was surprised to find the Jaw titan in this forest… I'm even more surprised to find you!"

He didn't respond, just glared angrily, but his mind went into overdrive; Jaw titan? Is that Ymir? The beast titan carried on, "I bet you thought you were pretty sneaky when you spotted me on that forest path didn't you?" His fingers twitched dangerously at the knowledge he hadn't hidden away, that they had been spotted.

"But instead of outright dealing with you then… you piqued my interest. Because you see… you're an anomaly", bright blue eyes narrowed in confusion, as the taller furred titan pointed a lanky finger at him, "you're not one of the nine you see, you shouldn't be!" He growled, he had no idea what he was on about. He just wanted to grab Ymir and get the hell away, so he took one threatening stop forward. "Ah ah ah! You just stay right there… otherwise", he clicked his fingers, and instantly all of the mindless titans suddenly sprang into action, grabbing hold of the frozen Ymir before she could react. She let out a terrifying screech as she found her smaller form immobilised completely. The titans had moved too quickly, much more quickly than before.

Her friend let out a concerned whine, and stopped dead. And the beast titan's sickening grin stretched even further.

"It seems you understand the situation you're in. Goooooood. Now, if I were you, i'd do exactly as I say, because if you don't? Who knows what they might do?"

Ymir let out an agonized scream as her left arm was torn into by one of the titans teeth, the entire arm tearing from her body in a shower of blood. And he let out a fearful cry as the titan who harmed his friend began to chew away at the dismembered limb.

"Hmmm… did I say you could do that?" The gravelly voice of the beat titan silenced all, as he raised a furry finger towards the munching titan. "Kill him". The next moment; half of the mindless titans pounced on the monster and tore it apart in a shower of guts and gore. The sight which sent shivers down his spine, shivers at the horrifying realisation; he can control them!

"As you can see, I can… direct the urges of these mindless beasts. Although I have to mention that the control is not infallible… so, I suggest that if you don't want to watch your little friend get torn to shreds… you listen to what I have to say".

His fists clenched in fury, wanting to strike down the beast but unable to do anything for risk of Ymir being killed. So he nodded his head at the taller titan, reluctantly accepting his suggestion. If possible, the beast titans maw grew even more pleased, it's cheeks practically tearing from its disquieting grin. "Excellent! Now, believe it or not, I did not come here to fight you", he snorted disbelievingly, his actions proved otherwise, "it's true, you may not believe so, but I was not even aware you existed since recently. So when I did discover you, I just had to meet you! And I have to say… I am most impressed!" He growled, whilst some of the words flew right over his head, he could garner the gist of what the beast was saying, and he really, really didn't care. He grunted for the monster to carry on.

"Hmmm… I can see your an impatient fellow. Very well, straight to the point! I want you to join us!" Silence filled the forest air, as his fiery red brows shot up into his hairline, 'join us?' Who was this 'us?' He spoke about? Did he mean the likes of the armoured and colossal titan? Those who would take pleasure in slaughtering innocent humans?

"Dhhooont lhiiiiseeen toooo eiiim!" Ymir managed to groan out, her form still held tightly by the bloodied hands of his kind. The beast titan tutted and waved a hand, "keep her quiet please!" Immediately, a few of the titans dug their disgusting hands into Ymir's mouth, and before she could bite down with her powerful jaw, they yanked downwards, and a sickening squelch broke out as Ymir's lower jaw was torn from her face. A silent scream tore from her mutilated mouth. This understandably enraged her friend, who let out a monstrous roar that caused the nearby leaves to blow away, and a wave of wind to smack against the beast titan harmlessly. It's eyes widening in mild amusement.

"Well, you've certainly got a throat on you, but other than harming my ears what did you hope to accomplish with tha…" he trailed off as he turned to look at his mindless minions, and what he saw certainly shocked him.

They were all dead still, not a single muscle moving from any of them, as all of their eyes stared, terrified at the roaring titan, one of them; a small 3 metre titan began to back away, fear permeating it's entire being. Alarm bells went off in the Beast titans head as he started damage control. "None of you move…" he warned, and at first it seemed like his warning fell on deaf ears, but after a few moments, that fear that gripped them dissipated, and the blank minion look returned. The Beast titan allowed a silent breath of relief to pass.

"Well… that was certainly… interesting", he turned back to the enraged titan, "consider me amazed now." He clapped his gangly long arms together, "now you just have to join us, it'd honestly be in your best interest to be honest", he outstretched a hand for a handshake, "what do you say?"

He didn't say anything, he let his actions speak for him instead, and the Beast titan received his answer in the form of a devastating right hook smashing into his furry jaw, a resounding crack breaking out as he pushed as much anger into the punch as he could, sending the Beast tumbling back into a nearby tree, jaw obviously smashed to pieces. Steam billowed of his fist as it healed the damage done from its punch. The beast titan steadied itself, furry palm slamming its jaw back into place as it began to heal, steam fizzing instantly. The grin from before turned into a broken disappointed frown.

"V-vherry wheeel. Yooov maaaayd yuuuur chhhooooce", he snapped his jaw back into place with a disturbing click, he then pointed to Ymir and dread filled her friends form at his next words; "kill her", and the horrible pain and impending death of Ymir renewed with disgusting vigour. But he wasn't going to allow it to come to that, as he bolted across the clearing, arms raised to destroy her attackers.

But he wouldn't get that chance.

"Stop him".

He suddenly found himself surrounded on all sides of pouncing titans, springing from the surrounding treelines, where they had been hiding. And he found himself grabbed on all sides, held back from saving his friend. He roared as he grabbed one of the titans and swung him into another, sending them to the ground, he followed up by crushing two of his attackers napes with a squeeze of his powerful hands. He was quickly pushing through his attackers, but it just wasn't enough. His eyes rose to meet Ymir's terrified gaze, as her remaining limbs were torn asunder.

His eyes bulged and a terrified whine tore from his throat, as he punched straight through a 10 metre titan, gnawing on his chest. No! No! No! He gripped the head of a fellow 15 metre titan with both hands and pulled them apart, the titans head tearing apart like cloth, seams of flesh popping. Get the HELL OUT OF MY WAY!

His eyes never left Ymir's as he waived through the monsters, he was so close now, so very close. Just one more step and he could reach her!

But 'so close' wasn't close enough.

It happened so suddenly, she had been held up by mangy hands from all sides, limbless and jawless, as she flailed around helplessly in the vain hope of escaping her captors.

Twas fruitless however, as one of the titans craned Ymir's neck forward, giving full access to her cloth covered nape, access one of the mindless beasts fully intended to take as it's maw opened wide.

His eyes practically screamed his fear as he threw out his arm in a final attempt to save his best friend. And he could! His arm could now reach and grasp Ymir from her attackers, he was going to save her! Save her from the jagged teeth descending upon her neck.

That was, until a piece of rubble shot straight into his outstretched arm, tearing it straight off at the shoulder. But he didn't feel the searing pain that came with the dismemberment, instead all he felt was his heart smash into a million pieces, as he watched the monster holding his friend tear into her nape, teeth tearing flesh like parchment, and as if to strike a final nail into his heart, as the titan tore away, blood and sinew exploded everywhere. And as he gave a final look into his friends wonderful eyes, he watched as the light behind them faded away, and Ymir fell limp in her captors grasps.

"Oof, I have to say, I do have a good throwing arm… took your arm clean off!" His ears heard the beast titans mockery, but his brain didn't register it, or more accurately his brain didn't care about the mockery.

No… all his soul cared for was the scrap of blue cloth dangling from the horrid 10 metre titans maw.

No…

That blue cloth that was a gift from him to her, the first gift he had ever given, the first gift she had ever received.

It can't be…

That same blue cloth that was now stained red with her blood.

She can't be…

That same blue cloth that now signified the only friend he had ever made in this life had been killed.

I'm… im going to…

That the one person he loved in this life had been killed in-front of him.

I'm going to...

Unaware of the world around him, his captive form began to emit a torrent of steam from all of his skin, his fiery red hair blew wildly, as his form began to involuntarily hunch over, spinal definition protruding from his back, his nails began to lengthen and sharpen like the sharpest blades, and his teeth, his teeth sharpened into razor sharp slits.

All of you.

But his eyes suffered the most significant change; they were no longer such a kind and expressive shade of blue. Now they were sharpened and angular in nature, that same shade of blue somehow darker… deadlier. Everyone felt it, the Beast, the mindless titans, they all felt the sheer anger and despair emanating from this steaming titan. So much so that the Beast titan quickly fled from the scene, able to see the so called writing on the wall. It was fortunate for him he did, as soon as he left, the captive titan's head tilted back and let out an earth shattering roar.

I'M GOING TO EVISCERATE ALL OF YOU.

And on that day, titan-kind received a grim warning… that no matter there overwhelming number, he would be there to rip and tear it's monstrous kind to shreds until there was none remaining.

Later

He lay there, covered in blood and gore, entrails not his own splayed on him, not an inch of him wasn't covered in some kind of blood or guts, but he didn't care, none of it was his anyway. It all belonged to the many mindless monsters he had ripped apart in his mind-numbing fury. He didn't even remember what he had done, just that the end result was; he was alive, and everyone else dead.

Everyone…

His form had returned to its natural state, no longer consumed by righteous rage.

His listless eyes found that same blue cloth from before, dangling loosely from the jaw of that same 10 metre titan that had killed his friend. Just the sight of it filled his world with fury once again, but this time no rage escaped him… no roar left his haggard throat.

All that left him was an involuntary sob, and salty tears dripping from his misty eyes.

Ymir…

That single sob transformed into multiple, and soon enough he was crying his soul out, hands raised to cover his face to hide himself from the terrible world he lived in. What was he to do now? Who was he going to talk to? Play games with? Spend his best moments with? He was by himself now, no friends on either side; the titans wanted to eat him, the humans would want to kill him, surrounded on all sides by those that would do him harm.

This world is a nightmare come to life.

Honestly, he didn't even want to be in this world anymore, if all it did was take from him. Take his mind, his friends, everything. What the hell did he even do in this world?

The image of a smiling young boy filled his mind.

He shot up, a few entrail pieces falling away.

The image of an older woman crippled from the waist down filled his mind.

He leaned his head forward, hands cupping each side, an unfocused look forming on his face.

The image of a blond awed older man holding two children filled his mind.

One of his hands moved to cover his mouth, to stifle the raging sobs. This hand had a certain red cloth wrapped around his pinky finger. His eyes caught sight of it.

Finally, the image of a soelem looking black haired girl, wrapping his ever precious red gift around his pinky finger.

His eyes continued to water, but for an entirely different reason, his mouth was still covered, but it was to hide his sad smile.

'What the hell did he even do in this world?'

He saved those in need of saving.

He saved his little ones.

He still had a purpose in this terrible world.

So he had to get up, he had to keep moving, keep plugging away until he saved as many as he could.

Because that was what Ymir would've wanted.

That or she'd kick his ass for wallowing in self pity.

Most likely the latter in all honesty Ymir was the jealous type. And with a body shaking sigh, he let his final tears fall, he was done crying, he'd honour Ymir's memory instead of cry about it. He just wished he had the chance to say goodbye.

"Can't get this crappy thing off me!"

Hold up.

His head swerved to the origin of the noise, only to see that blue cloth from before. Nothing was any different, was his hearing playing tricks on him? He faced forward once again, a contemplative look on his face.

"Ugh… this is absolutely disgusting!"

Okay… what!?

He turned year again to see no difference, but he was sure that he heard something this time. So he took a sharper look at the blood stained cloth, looking for any abnormalities, an unsure feeling of… something rising in his chest. He had no idea what he was looking for, but…

"Uh… hello?"

There it was!

His eyes zoomed in on a slight rustle within the cloth, and within seconds he was upon it, that same feeling practically blooming in his chest. Gently, as if touching a delicate ice sculpture, he grasped the torn end of the cloth and pulled it down into his open palm, a small oomphf sounding out as something smacked into his palm.

"Ah, Shit!" The noise came from the bundled cloth, as something hurriedly flung it back to reveal a young girl garbed in filthy rags with ratty, unwashed, long brown hair. Or at least he thought it was brown, the large amount of blood covering the girl did bring that into question. But right now he couldn't care less, instead he was completely silent as he watched the girl look around for a moment, before slowly gazing up towards him.

Grey eyes.

His heart stopped, that blooming, unknown feeling almost exploding from his very soul.

Could it really be?

The girl tilted her head to the side and seemingly took a small sniff of his gore covered form, before squeezing her nose as a disgusted gag came from her mouth.

"You smell like shit, idiot!"

He didn't respond straight away, his eyes slowly widening in realisation, and when they fully opened?

He let out a soul cleansing laugh, one that lasted for quite a while.

He wasn't sure why, or how to be honest, but he didn't care.

He had his Ymir back.

"Oi dumbass! Don't just laugh, we both need a Fucking bath! You smell like ass, and I'm covered in blood!"

Oh yeah… that was Ymir alright.

And as he carefully brought the cursing young girl up to his face so he could nuzzle her, he let her half hearted insults wash over him like a warm blanket. But even they soon fell away, to be replaced by a small form returning the hug as best they could. And for that moment, he thanked the world for this small miracle.

Chapter 4 finished

Weeeeeeell, I certainly hope you enjoyed this chapter, hope you went "awwwww" at the fluff and went "noooo" at the sad parts. Honestly, when I first started this story, I never really expected to go with the titan fluff as much as I did. I certainly don't regret it, cause I enjoy writing it, and from what some of you have told me; you enjoy it!

Ps. If anyone knows about any stories similar (titan fluff), or about kind titans please let me know! Whether it be in the Shingeki category or the attack one. Cause this story was initially inspired by RedCoaster's "Rogue", and I hope they read this story themselves!