One day Ed and Al got a new idea. "Hey Ed!" said Al. "Remember how we tried to revive mom, and how now our supreme skills are now far superior to before?"
"Of course I do you stupid bitch," said Ed.
"We should undo the tragic death of our favorite rapper… XXXTentacion!" said Al.
"Wow, of course! Such a talented and kind-hearted person has no good reason to get shot!"
"Exactly," said Alphonse, "XXXTentacion was the best rapper since Lil Jon!"
So Ed and Al gathered the materials and prepared to do the resurrection inside Roy Mustang's house. "Hey, what the fuck are you stupid little shits doing in my house?!" said Roy.
"We're reviving XXXTentacion!" said Ed.
"Oh shit, can I get in on it?" said Roy Mustang.
"Name five of his songs!" said Al.
Roy Mustang named five of XXXTentacion's songs, which I don't need to say because any REAL fan would know. Then they set up the transmutation circle, and got ready to revive the fallen. They did the alchemic enactment! But when the smoke cleared, something was clearly wrong.
"Hey," said Al, "XXXTentacion isn't white, and doesn't have a short mustache, and doesn't only have one testicle, and doesn't wear a Mein Kampf T-Shirt!"
"Hahahaha," said the man standing before them, "I had my goons manipulate the enthalpy of your spell, so that instead of reviving my favorite rapper, XXXTentacion, you instead revived myself… Adolf Hitler!"
"Oh no!" said Roy Mustang.
"Now I'm going to join the big pharm industry and jack up the price of insulin so high, that all the people with diabetes will die, and the obesity epidemic will by solved!"
"But skinny people can get Type 2 Diabetes," said Ed.
"Shut the fuck up!" said Hitler. Then he ran towards the door. Ed, Al, and Roy Mustang all tried to stop him, but he threw them all off with his unholy bodily strength. As he exited the house, he said, "It would legit be dope if you guys could revive X tho."
"What have us done?!" said all three of them in perfect synchronization.
To be continued!