Monday, December 11th 7:15 PM
"I don't think so Phoebes, the guy is a moron," Helga said. Helga was laying on her bed, talking on the phone with her best friend. "Helga, you spend more time with him than anyone else. Including myself, I would add," Phoebe said, Helga rolling her eyes at the insinuation. "You already told me you kissed him twice," Phoebe began when Helga cut her off. "Three times actually," Helga said. "Alright, three times! Do you really expect me to believe that you two don't feel anything for each other?" Phoebe said. "Well, technically he kissed me the second and third time. And the third time I slapped him," Helga said, biting her thumbnail. "You slapped him? Why did you do that? You started this by kissing him the first time. And don't tell me you didn't like that he did it, because that's bullshit!" Helga heard Phoebe swear and pulled the phone away from her ear a second. "Wow, Phoebe. Since when do you swear?" Helga asked. "Since my best friend so infuriatingly started to come to me with all these confusing feelings she has. Which I don't mind, I'm your friend I'm here for you. What makes it infuriating is that it's so obvious what the answer is, but you're too stubborn and closed off to see it," Phoebe explained. "I asked him how he felt and he said he didn't know how he felt," Helga said, holding her stomach. She had remembered how those words had felt.
"This was the second time you kissed, after he had said this to you?" Phoebe asked. "Yeah," Helga responded. "Why would he kiss you after that?" Phoebe asked. "I don't know. I'm not the idiot whisperer," Helga said. "It sounds a little like he's as neurotic and closed off as you," Phoebe said. "I am not neurotic. What the hell are you talking about?" Helga yelled into the phone. "Well Helga, you were obsessed with him for years. You built a shrine around him. You spent your days switching between writing poetry about him and bullying him. Now you're both older and terrified of being open with each other. Helga, you're a little neurotic," Phoebe finished. She had pointed the problem out in the darkness Helga felt surrounded by. "Damn Phoebe, you hit on the head didn't you?" Helga said. "Take some time and search how you really feel. You clearly love him, but you need to accept it. Once you figure that out you need to tell him as soon as possible. Don't dangle this, if you can be happy you should reach for it," Phoebe said. "O.K. I will. Thanks Phoebe," Helga said. "Of course Helga," Phoebe said. There was a slight pause. "Next time you're acting crazy, I'm gonna get all in your face about it," Helga said. "I would expect nothing less from you," Phoebe said. "Olga, get down here!" Helga heard Bob yelling. " I gotta go Phoebes, I'm gonna ignore my dad for a little while which will probably lead to another fight," Helga bluntly put it. "Keep your head up Helga, it gets better eventually," Phoebe said. "Yeah, don't count on it," Helga said hanging up the phone.
Helga heard the name being shouted. She knew her father was referring to her, however Olga was also somewhere in the house, so she let him shout while she laid back on her bed. "The other one! Helga, get your ass down here! We need to talk!" Bob finally said. "Oh joy," Helga thought to herself. She lackadaisically slumped out of bed and made her way down to the source of the yelling. She walked into a typical scene. Her mother was in the kitchen drinking alone at the table while Bob waved his arms and yelled. "What fresh Hell is this?" Helga thought to herself. She walked down the stairs and she saw her father holding a piece of paper. He turned to her and she saw the full fury of his face. "What is this young lady?" Bob asked handing her the paper. It was a packet addressed to Helga. It was from her latest submission to the women's magazine. They had sent her a copy of the magazine and a letter from the editor thanking her for the submission. "You opened my mail?" Helga said, scowling at her father. "How many time I have I told you to drop this, and start taking your future seriously?" Bob began to yell.
Helga looked up at her father, her jaw tightening. "Well, what do you have to say for yourself?" Bob asked her. "Why did you open this? It's none of your business!" Helga yelled back. "DON'T you tell me what is or isn't my business under my roof! I told you that you need to start to looking into a real future. Not one where you write books that no one wants to buy," Bob said. "This is just something I did on my own. What the hell does me writing in a magazine have to do with my future?" Helga demanded. "Read the other sheet," Bob pointed. Helga looked down at the other paper in the packet. It was a letter of recommendation the editor had authored for Helga to give to her college of choice for their writing program.
"Well alright then, I didn't ask her to write this but I'm happy she did. This will help come application time," Helga said turning to leave the room with her property in her hand. Bob ran in front of her blocking her path. "You didn't hear a word I said did you?" Bob said. "No I wasn't listening once I figured out you opened my mail without my permission," Helga said, as she scowled and attempted to move around her father. Bob blocked her escape by grabbing Helga by the scruff of her shirt. "You listen to me young lady, I will not have you spend your life broke and unsuccessful because you decided to chase some idiotic dream rather than being practical and doing something with your life! How do you think that reflect on me?" Bob said, holding his daughter as if he were mugging her. Helga grabbed Bob's wrists and pulled them off her shirt and pushed him away. "Get away from me and keep your hands off me!" Helga screamed at her father. Bob grabbed his youngest daughter by the arms and slammed her against the wall pinning her there. "Get off me!" Helga screamed. She instinctively lifted her leg and kicked him in the stomach. Bob backed down, holding his stomach growling in pain. "Why you little bitch! You're worse than your mother!" Bob said.
Bob moved again to accost Helga when Olga suddenly put her body in front of Helga. "Daddy! How dare you put your hands on Helga!" Olga screamed at her father. Helga noticed the rare anger in Olga's voice. "I don't know what is going on here. However you absolutely do not use that kind of language on a young women nor do you put your hands on them!" Olga said pointing her finger in her father's face. "Olga this is between me and her," Bob said. "I'm trying to make her see what she's doing is wrong," Bob tried explaining. His body language had changed speaking to Olga. He was trying to negotiate with her, his face softened speaking to Olga. He was not longer waving his arms, but had put them on his sides. "I don't very much care what you are discussing. I saw what you did and you should be ashamed of yourself! You once told me to never let a man treat me the way you treat Helga!" Olga yelled matching her father's forgotten fury. "She kicked me though!" bob tried explaining. "After you threw her into a wall! Who do you think you are treating your family in such a way? You've never once done that to me. What gives you the right to do it to her, or anyone else for that matter? What makes her different?" Olga demanded. Bob grew silent for a moment. He looked over Olga's shoulder at Helga. "She's nothing, and you're not," Bob said. "She can't make a life doing what she wants because it won't be enough," Bob finished.
Helga always knew how her father had felt. She had never heard him say the words. They stung like a knife being twisted, all the same. "You have no respect or idea of who your daughter is. You're disgusting," Olga said looking into her father's eyes. "Come on Helga, we're going out," Olga said grabbing Helga by the hand and led her to the foyer. "Grab your coat, come on," Olga said to Helga. Without objecting Helga grabbed her coat and they both made their way to Olga's rental car. Olga began driving away from the house. Helga in the font seat looking at her older sister. "Helga I'm sorry you had to go through that. I know you've told me daddy was getting worse. I didn't realize it had gotten this bad," Olga said. She looked at Helga her eyes practically watering. "Wow Olga, I had no idea you had that kinda fight in you. Didn't know you could turn on feisty Olga whenever you wanted," Helga said smiling. "I don't get that way until I need to baby sister," She said smiling back. "Where does he get off putting his hands on you like that?" Olga yelled. "It's a pretty common fight, at least you were there to keep it from escalating," Helga said. "Are you hungry baby sister?" Olga asked. "Yeah I can eat," Helga said. Olga smiled and made her way downtown so they could find a place to eat.
The pair found a small restaurant in a little hole in the wall alley. It was a small intimate setting. There were only a few people there when they sat. "What can I get for the two of your lovely ladies?" The waiter asked. "Well don't you have a lovely smile?" Olga asked the waiter. The waiter smiled and Olga continued to flirt. He was in his twenties and "not terrible looking" Helga thought. Helga sat back and watched her sister. Impressed at her ability to assert herself and switch right back to her overly sweet, flirty personality. They ordered their food and Olga started typing away on her cell phone. "Sorry baby sister, I'm just warning my husband to stay away from Bob," Olga said. "You called him bob and not 'daddy'," Helga observed. "I did, I just… I can't believe he was acting like that. I've never seen him act that way," Olga said. "Well didn't you hear, you're not nothing. Probably why he never treated you like that," Helga said. She folded her arms and looked at her feet. "Helga you are not nothing, I have no idea where he gets that notion. You are nothing and you deserve to be treated with the same respect as everyone else," Olga said going back to assertive. "I'm completely nonplussed by his idiotic ideas about the differing worth of his two children," Olga said. She was waiving her hands around and growing louder, and starting to draw attention. Olga ignored the looks she was getting and continued. "Helga, how long have these fights been coming to the point of violence?" Olga asked Helga. "It's been getting worse and worse. He only started getting really physical the past year. I've never seen it but I think he's getting that way with mom too. Every couple of months she'd have some mysterious shiner that she won't talk about," Helga said.
Helga continued to explain the fights she had been having with her dad. Including the one a couple months ago concerning her writing. "It just seems as the time for me to move on to college gets closer that he gets angrier and angrier. And I'm tired of ignoring it I guess," Helga said. "What about mummy?" Olga asked. "How has she been dealing with all of this?" Olga asked. "Really, Olga? How do you think she deals with it? How she always has. She drinks herself into a coma and just blocks it all out," Helga said. "Oh my god," Olga said putting her hands over her mouth. She was almost crying. "Olga our mother is an alcoholic, who enables her abusive husband," Helga bluntly said. Olga bowed her head. The food came over and Helga and Olga straightened up. Helga electing to go with a burger and Olga small pasta and chicken. Helga began eating where Olga just stood sitting up, almost in shock. "God, you're right," Olga said. "All those signs they teach you I can see. We're a statistic Helga," Olga said dejectedly. Olga picked up her fork and took a bite of the sauce. She perked up immediately upon tasting the food. "My goodness, this is divine. Helga, you must try this," Olga said as she started to dig in. Helga laughed at her ditsy yet brilliant sister.
"So what do we do baby sister? You're going to college but mummy will still be around. Also you still have to live in the house while all this is still happening. We need to get the two of you out of this situation," Olga said. "Well we've been living in this for a while Olga. The only reason you know about it know is because you're in town for the next few weeks. Bob might behave a bit now that you've called him out on it but as soon as you're gone, he'll be right back on it," Helga said. "Which is why it's all the more important for us to figure out a solution to this," Olga said. "There is no magic solution, Olga. Mom has resigned herself to drinking until she can't feel anything and I'll hopefully be out of the house soon. She'll never change, and nether will he," Helga said. She exhaled, defeated. Helga went back to her burger.
"I'm so sorry you have to deal with all of this Helga, I just wish there was something I could do," Olga said. Olga put her hand on her head, leaned forward and put her elbow on the table for support. They both sat like that for sometime. "It's alright Olga. We'll live. A couple scrapes won't bring me down," Helga finally said. "It's not about that Helga, you shouldn't be in this situation. Do you have some friends that could possibly allow you to stay with them for a few months?" Olga asked. Helga thought about it for a bit. She knew she could always lean on Phoebe, or even Arnold if she needed to. "You could always come live with me and Owen. I travel a lot but Owen is always home!" Olga said. "It would be wonderful! You would love New York City. You can excel as a writer there!" Olga exclaimed. "I need to finish this year, during the college off season I'll take you up on that. Right now, I just need to finish this school year. Luckily Bob isn't actually around that much. He likes work a lot more than he likes his family these days," Helga said. "Are you sure, Helga? You're an adult we can figure something out even if mummy isn't willing to leave," Olga asked. "Yeah I'm sure," Helga said.
They finished their food and Olga ordered drinks for them. "So, subject change. How's a the dating life?" Olga asked. Helga looked at her not knowing where to begin. "What dating life?" Helga asked. "Come on, Helga. Tell me about him," Olga said. "Who is this him of which you speak?" Helga said leaning back and crossing her arms. "Arnold, obviously. I've never known of any boys to call on you at home. I'm here a couple weeks and one of them shows up out of the blue. I saw the way his eyes lit up when he saw you. Plus you're losing jewelry in his car. Come on. I know you're at least spending time with him. Which is rare for you," Olga said. She leaned forward and eyed Helga waiting for an answer. "Those big doe eyes aren't going to take the hint my silence is giving are they?" Helga said. "Please Helga, tell me all about him," Olga asked. "Nope, since there is no him," Helga said. "Oh and that's why he just showed up and whisked you off somewhere, because there is no him," Olga said mockingly. "Well you were all over him so I head to clear his head, and pour ice water on him," Helga said narrowing her eyes at her sister. "Oh Helga, I was being nice and hospitable," Olga said, waiving her hand dismissively. "Olga, the only way you could have been more hospitable is if you literally sucked his dick," Helga said. Olga began laughing at that Helga joined her laughing. "O.K. I admit, I can flirt with people without realizing it," Olga said. "Come on, tell me are the two of you dating?" Olga asked again
Helga looked at her sister for sometime not answering her question. Each glance was met by Olga's inquisitive stare. "I… I don't know if we are," Helga finally said. Helga explained to Olga how she and Arnold began casually hanging out. Also explaining how casual escalated into them kissing on a few occasions. "My word Helga. So when you asked him how he felt, what happened?" Olga asked. They had gotten the check and Helga wilted again. Olga paid for dinner and she motioned to Helga to follow her. They didn't go back to the car right away. They began walking down a deserted street. "So? What happened?" Olga asked again. "He said he didn't know how he felt. Then he said I was important to him. Then we kissed again," Helga said. "How do you feel?" Olga asked. "I feel…" Helga started. She was conflicted, but most of all she was scared. "What if I told him I loved him and he didn't feel the same way? How could I live with myself?" She thought to herself. She was terrified of being open to Arnold. Helga stopped walking. She dropped her head, she felt that burning in her stomach again. She held her stomach and exhaled heavily. "What if he ignores me?" Helga whispered. Her eyes began burning, as she felt the tears slowly crawl down her cheeks. "How could he possibly ignore you Helga? From everything you've told me, he's crazy about you. Just a little confused," Helga lifted her head, her eyes overwhelmed with tears. She looked at her sister, then began sobbing into her hands. "The first people who were supposed to love me ignored me, why wouldn't he?" Helga said through the tears. Olga seeing her sister in pain hugged her tightly.
Helga sobbed into her sister's shoulder. "Little sister, let me tell you something," Olga said pulling her and Helga apart so that Helga was right in front of her. "You can't go through life thinking everyone is our parents. You can't think that the things they did to you are normal and that other will do the same. From everything you've told me about him, he seems like someone who might feel something for you. I don't know him as well as you, so I can't pretend to know his mind. However I do know that everyone is different and you should give him a chance to love you no matter what. Does he make you happy?" Olga asked. "Yes, yes he makes me really happy," Helga said, smiling through her tears at the question. "Does he treat you well?" Olga asked. "He treats me like a princess," Helga said smiling more as she thought about Arnold. "Then you should let him love you. Take that chance, take your chance at being happy. You deserve someone who makes you feel as happy and safe as Owen makes me feel," Olga said. Helga wiped her eyes again. "I do love him, I think that's why I'm so scared," Helga admitted. "It is scary, baby sister. Love always is. Letting yourself be that open with someone is scary. If you're lucky though, you find someone who you can be completely open with and they'll accept and love you for exactly who you are," Olga said. "I'm pretty sure he's that guy. I slapped him after he kissed me and he laughed it off. Then he told me to stop beating myself up because I reacted that way," Helga said laughing through her tears. "He sounds like a keeper Helga," Olga said. "He is, he really is," Helga said. The tears had stopped and Helga was genuinely smiling at her sister. Helga wiped her eyes again and exhaled. "If you feel this way, you need to tell him. You need to lay it all out there and let him know," Olga said. "I know, I will," Helga said. The sister's smiled at each other. Olga started walking slowly back towards her car, Helga following. Helga put her arms around her sister as they walked, resting her head on her shoulders.