Arnold's Wizarding World
Chapter 3: Arnold Gets Sorted
Me: Arnold! Get down here! Before he sees you!
Arnold: I can't believe you brought him!
Me: I needed reviews! They motivate me :(
Arnold: He's coming!
Me: *drags Arnold inside closet* Anyway, enjoy! Arnold and I will be chilling in here.
After spending an entire night panicking, not sleeping due to being extremely worried about the safety of my parents, and realizing that I literally couldn't trust anyone in this fake world, my Grandparents took me to a train station I've never been to before.
People had their owls and their suitcases on their carts, and I was stunned to see people literally run through a wall in order to get to Platform 9 ¾.
Meanwhile Abner walked protectively by my side, the only thing I could trust.
I noticed people look at me weird as I walked across the station with my pig, but I didn't mind.
"Arnold! There you are!" Gerald exclaimed. "Let's sit together in the train."
Apparently in order to get to Hogwarts, you traveled on some sort of magical train. This wasn't the first time I questioned whether or not I was dreaming. Maybe I am.
As we bid farewell to our families, Gerald and I stepped into the train together.
"Man I hope we get put in the same house. It'd really suck if one of us was put in Slytherin and the other was put in Gryffindor."
"Why?"
"Are you kiddin Arnold? Slytherin and Gryffindor have been rival houses for decades!"
"It's just a silly rivalry Gerald, it shouldn't be anything we need to worry about."
I had bigger things to worry about anyway.
"Could it be, is it, the Wandless Boy?" a random kid asked as a few kids turned their heads to look at me.
"Huh?"
"You're the kid who got one of the special wands from Ollivander!" Sid exclaimed. "Not even Ollivander himself could find a wand for you, you must be special!"
Wait, Sid doesn't know me in this world?
"I reckon he's going to end up being the new Harry Potter," Stinky added. "He's even got his eyes!"
The kids agreed and I shifted my head, only to make direct eye contact with Sean, who was glaring at me. Seymour, the kid from PS 119 who I competed against that one time at the city's eating contest, was also glaring at me. I hope he's not mad about that.
"C'mon Arnold, there's a compartment here with a few extra spaces," Gerald said as we slid into a compartment.
Across from us sat Phoebe, who was invested in a book.
I turned to look at Gerald, and noticed him blush, that gave me a sense of relief.
She looked up and jumped, "Oh! I'm sorry, I didn't see you there."
"It's okay," I smiled. "What are you reading?"
"Oh, I'm reading a potions book. I want to be one step ahead of the game when we start taking potions. I hear the Professor is… detailed."
"Aw shucks, I'm not looking forward to potions," Gerald mumbled.
Potions? I'm not even going to ask.
"Hey Phoebe, where's Helga?" I asked, receiving a stunned look from both Phoebe and Gerald.
"Why would you be asking for her?" Gerald asked.
"Is she not Phoebe's friend?" I asked.
Phoebe eyes saddened, "Helga and I haven't been friends for a long time."
"Are you sure those dementors didn't mess with your memory man?" Gerald asked as he gave me a piece of chocolate.
I sighed and popped the chocolate in my mouth, "Sorry, I must have forgotten."
"She's probably with Sean. Those two have been together for a long time."
WHAT!? I choked on my chocolate, causing Gerald stand quickly.
"Arnold!" he exclaimed as he squeezed my stomach.
A woman with a trolley full of candy passed by us, but as soon as she saw how chaotic our compartment was, she walked away, probably pretending she didn't see anything.
Eventually, I was able to breathe again, and Phoebe had me practice some breathing exercises.
HELGA HAS A BOYFRIEND!? AND IT ISN'T ME!?
Besides kidnapping my parents, this fake world just made things personal!
"We're here!" Phoebe exclaimed.
I ignored the tight feeling in my chest and I turned my head, eyeing the castle with glossed and fascinated eyes, the tight feeling quickly being replaced with curiosity. The castle was beautiful!
"Aw man I can't wait!" Gerald exclaimed.
I was in absolute awe. This fake world may be fake, but they did not mess around with the beauty of the details of Hogwarts!
The school was awesome! It took me a good ten minutes to whip myself back into shape.
We were now standing in front of a dining hall, and older students were watching us with anticipation. According to Gerald, we "first years" were supposed to be sorted into our houses before having dinner. We were sorted based on our personality and our skills. The four houses were Hufflepuff, Slytherin, Gryffindor and Ravenclaw. What a bunch of weird names.
Apparently, a magical hat sorted us, they called it the Sorting Hat, or something like that.
An old woman stood before us, and Gerald whispered to me that she was the headmistress, Minerva McGonagall.
"Gerald Johanssen!" she called out as Gerald gleefully approached the hat and took a seat.
The headmistress placed the hat on his head, and it started talking. "Hmm, I'm sensing bravery, lots of it. This one's easy, GRYFFINDOR!"
That, was the COOLEST thing I've ever seen in my life!
The Gryffindor table cheered, and I noticed Jamie O and his buddies stand up and cheer loudly.
Gerald passed by me and whispered, "I hope you get put in there too!"
"Eugene Horowitz!"
Eugene walked up to the hat, only to trip on one of the steps.
I noticed the Slytherin table— was that the Slytherin table — I think it was, laugh — and Eugene's face grew red.
"I'm okay!" he exclaimed.
The hat was placed on his head and after a bit of deliberation… "HUFFLEPUFF!"
The Hufflepuff table cheered and Eugene gleefully walked toward them.
Sheena and Lila soon joined Eugene at the Hufflepuff table.
Rhonda, Seymour, and Curly were placed in Slytherin.
Brainy, Sid, Stinky, Harold and Nadine were put in Gryffindor.
Soon, it was Phoebe's turn to get the hat placed on her head.
"Hmm. Tricky, tricky, tricky. You have the brain of a Ravenclaw, but the bravery of a Gryffindor. I'm sensing lots of loyalty, however, and for that, you will be placed, in GRYFFINDOR!"
The gryffindor table cheered and Gerald motioned for Phoebe to sit next to him.
Sean was nex—
"SLYTHERIN!"
Welp, that was fast.
"Arnold Shortman!"
The room silenced as I stepped onto the chair and took a seat.
"Interesting. I sense loyalty, bravery, and boldness. You have the heart of a Hufflepuff, but the morals of a Gryffindor. I think you'd fit in great, in GRYFFINDOR!"
What a relief.
I walked toward Gerald, who was cheering ecstatically with Phoebe by his side.
"Helga G Pataki!"
I turned quickly and noticed Helga approach the hat.
"This one is tricky too. You're witty, and sneaky, but you also have a huge heart. You're secretly loyal, but cunning as well. You'd be great in Slytherin and Gryffindor."
"Just give me Slytherin you old hat there's no need to keep the world waiting."
The hat scoffed, "Such manners. You'd think they'd have more respect. Very well then, SLYTHERIN!"
I felt my heart drop as I watched the Slytherin table cheer.
"Before we begin our feast, I would like to introduce our staff for the year," the Headmistress announced as the teachers all stood.
I gasped as I noticed Mr. Simmons speaking to another teacher that I did not recognize.
"We have three new staff members this year. One of them is Professor Simmons, who will be teaching Muggle Studies. He will be replacing Professor Burbage, who was unfortunately killed by Voldemort last year."
I felt chills run down my spine, this Voldemort guy sounded really evil.
"Our second staff member is Professor Boris, who will be teaching Defense Against the Dark Arts."
I turned to look at Boris, who was staring straight at me. Oh no… I didn't know what to think of him anymore.
"I will continue teaching the transfigurations class until we find a proper replacement. And Professor Slughorn has unfortunately quit, so our new potions teacher, is Professor Draco Malfoy."
The whole room gasped and began whispering amongst themselves. A pale young man stood up; his hair was slicked back and he was wearing all black. He seemed like he was very young, but his sneer made him look incredibly scary.
"Why is everyone whispering?" I asked Gerald and Phoebe.
"Dude, do you know who that is? It's Draco Malfoy!" Gerald emphasized.
"I think I heard his name perfectly Gerald," I answered, unimpressed.
"He was a death eater man! His father worked for Voldemort!"
Oh.
"I heard he's here as a punishment," Phoebe stated. "The Ministry of Magic is forcing him to teach here for a year as a punishment for working with Voldemort."
"Aw man! That means he's going to be extra mean!" Gerald whined.
"He was Harry Potter's number one rival," Nadine added. "They were both seekers in their respective quidditch teams, the games were always intense!"
"Professor Malfoy will also become Slytherin's new head of house, and Professor Simmons will take my place as head of Gryffindor!" the Headmistress continued.
"Aw man!" Gerald groaned. "He's going to have favoritism towards the Slytherins."
"It's okay guys," I stated. "At least Professor Simmons is our head of house, he's going to be great!"
"Looking on the bright side, interesting," Gerald smiled.
I smiled and turned my head, making eye contact with Draco Malfoy, who was staring daggers into my eyes.
Well, he seemed friendly.
"Let the feast, begin!" the headmistress exclaimed as our long tables were filled with food.
I looked ahead, and my mouth began instantly watering.
There was a steamed turkey perfectly roasted, so perfect, that you were able to see the juiciness drip from the chicken breast as Phoebe cut through it with a knife.
Next to the turkey lied a platter of ham/cheese sandwiches, cut perfectly into triangles with no crusts on the sides.
I noticed Gerald use a spoon to scoop up a side of perfectly mashed potatoes, then placing gravy onto them.
Two pitchers lay on both sides of the food. One was filled with water and the other…?
"That's pumpkin juice," Gerald stated as he filled his goblet with it. "It's good! Try it!"
"The salad is good too, trust me on this Arnold, on acountta I never eat salad," Stinky informed as he scooped some onto his plate.
"Dig in Arnold, what are you waiting for man?" Gerald asked.
I smiled and took a sandwich, "I'm just admiring the scenery."
—
"Settle down everyone," Mr. Simmons said as we were all settled in Gryffindor tower. Apparently we slept in a tower.
"Before we retire to bed I want to set a few ground rules."
Harold, Sid, and Stinky groaned.
"No horsing around after lights out, you are not allowed to leave Gryffindor tower after lights out either. Treat everyone the way you'd want to be treated. If another Professor tells you to do something, do it, even if they are not me. Remember, all Professors have the authority to take away house points if there is any misbehavior. If you all want Gryffindor to win the house cup, try to be on your best behavior for the whole year. Questions?"
"Yeah!" Harold exclaimed as he rose his hand. "What if we get hungry during the night? If we can't leave the tower, we won't be able to get any food, we'll STARVE!"
I face palmed.
"You were literally just fed a grand feast," Gerald noted.
"We will be making trips to Hogsmeade every weekend, you can stock up on snacks there," Simmons answered. "Any other questions?"
No one rose their hands, allowing Simmons to nod.
"Great! Now, we have a very special announcement by our very special quidditch captain, Ginny Weasley."
I heard Jamie O and many other former quidditch members cheer loudly as a red haired girl stood in front of everyone.
"Hello everyone, I'm Ginevra Weasley, but my friends call me Ginny. I wanted to let you know about the quidditch tryouts that are going to be happening next week. If you think you got what it takes to play for Gryffindor, I highly encourage you try out. Who knows, maybe you could be the next Harry Potter."
Her cheeks slightly grew pink, and I figured it was because of the fire she was standing next to.
After Simmons concluded the night, we all retired for bed.
Just like last night, I couldn't sleep, this situation was too weird to be true. I also couldn't help thinking about my parents. What if La Sombra was torturing the—
I think I'm going to throw up.
I stood up and ran to the restroom, vomiting what was initially a wonderful feast into the toilet.
Positive thoughts Arnold, you're going to find your parents. You did it once, and you can do it again.
I need to find my parents and the Corazon so that I could get out of this crazy world.
I felt something nuzzle my foot and I looked down, noticing Abner sending me a worried look.
I pet him on the head and felt myself getting better, well, at least Abner was here keeping me company.
"Arnold…"
I jumped and looked around, that sounded like my mom's voice!
"We're here Arnold—"
That sounded like my Dad!
"Arnoldddd—"
"Mom? Dad?" I called out, noticing that the voices were growing distant.
"Arnold—"
I followed the voices, which led me to the exit of the tower. I remembered the warning Simmons gave us about not being out of the tower after lights out, and I knew I was risking house points, but, I needed to find my parents!
"Arnold, come here—"
A voice that sounded a lot like Helga's reminded me that this world was only fake, and it wouldn't be the end of the world if I left…
And I exited the tower, man, Helga could be a really bad influence sometimes.
"Arnold—"
I ran down the tower, and I noticed their voices getting louder and louder.
I sprinted, "Don't worry Mom and Dad! I'm coming!"
"We're in here, Arnold!"
I stood in front of a room labeled The Room of Requirement.
And the voices stopped.
I jiggled the knob, but it wouldn't budge. It was locked!
"May I ask what the bloody hell you're doing here so late?"
I jumped and turned, coming face to face with Professor Draco Malfoy himself.
"My parents are in there!" I exclaimed. "I heard their voices!"
Professor Malfoy rose an eyebrow, clearly not buying my excuse.
"Get back to bed before I take points away from Gryffindor. I will not hold back first year, taking points away from your Merlin forsaken house would come as an honor."
I scowled, "But they're in there! I heard them!"
"Is there a problem?" Boris asked as he approached us.
"Professor Boris! I think I found my parents, they're in there!" I exclaimed as I pointed inside the room.
Boris shifted his eyes towards Professor Malfoy. "I'll take him to his sleeping quarters Draco, I think he's been sleepwalking."
I opened my mouth to protest, but Boris' silencing look prevented me from doing so.
Professor Malfoy looked in between both of us, before turning and heading back into the dungeons, with his robe shifting with him.
After he was completely out of earshot, Boris kneeled in front of me, "Are you out of your mind boy? Do you realize how wreckless what you just did was?"
Arnold Shortman, wreckless? That's new.
"I heard them!" I exclaimed.
"And I believe you, but you have to be more careful!" Boris exclaimed. "Do you realize who Draco Malfoy is? He used to work for Voldemort! He's the last person you should be trusting. He might even be working for La Sombra! Did that ever cross your mind?"
No, it didn't cross my mind.
"But my parents—" I stated.
"Hogwarts is a supernatural place, you were probably hearing things. Unfortunately, you're not the first who's reported hearing voices. I'm sorry."
I deflated, causing Boris to place a hand on my shoulder.
"Come with me Arnold, I'll walk you back to your sleeping quarters."
Very important chapter.
There's a few reasons I added our dear friend Draco Malfoy in particular. First, he gives me Snape vibes, and he'd be a good substitute for the plot. (Spoiler Alert: Snape dies in Harry Potter Book 7, so adding him would be out of the question). Second, he's really important for the plot, so stay tuned for more Draco Malfoy moments. He won't be a primary character, but he will advance the plot, you'll see what I mean.
What'd you think of me putting Phoebe in Gryffindor? I WAS going to put her in Ravenclaw, but she has so many Gryffindor qualities that really reminded me of Hermione, so I was like, welp, what the heck. I was hesitant about putting Sid, Stinky, and Harold in Gryffindor, and I really had to analyze a few of the Hey Arnold episodes that they starred in. But my excuse is that they're always by Arnold's side when they go on adventures like in Wheezin Ed or the Headless Cabbie. Sure Harold is a scaredy cat, but he can be real loyal when he wants to, like in the episode where he works as a butcher. What do you guys think?
Draco: There you are you insufferable authoress! Where's my wand?
Me: How the heck did you find us?
Draco: A bloody closet. Quite the amazing hiding spot.
Me: Hey! No cursing while Arnold is in the room, or else I'll never let you leave! Now if you want your wand back, market the heck out of this story and get people to review! Offer them virtual cookies or something.
Draco: You mean biscuits. And is this story so awful that you can't get people to review on your own? That's pathetic. And why does that kid have an American football shaped head? Was he hexed?
Me: Hey! Unless you want me to force feed you American burgers, you will respect Craig Bartlett's work of art
Draco: Fine. You want me to market, I'll bloody market. Dear readers, don't review so that Vega can let me go back home.
Me: Actually, the more they review, the faster I update, and the faster I update, the faster I'll finish, and I'll set you free
Draco: Insufferable woman! You could at least feed me!
Me: I literally just offered you burgers
Draco: That greasy excuse for food is unacceptable, give me something delectable
Me: Well, there's always Chez Paris *winks at Arnold*
Draco: Is that bloody French?
Me: ...No…
Draco: Fine then, as long as it isn't American or French
Arnold: Chloe, maybe you shouldn't—
Me: REVIEW! Let's please try to get 10 guys, I need your feedback because I know people are reading this, but I don't know what y'all are thinking :\
Draco: Ugh.