Thursday, February 8th 9:05 AM

"So, why are you two so late?" Phoebe asked catching up to Helga.

Helga looked down at Phoebe and smiled coyly. "You know how dummy is, he's always late," Helga said.

Phoebe walked in silence waiting for the second part of her story. Finally finished waiting she said, "So you didn't jump Arnold's bones in the parking lot?"

"How the hell did you know?" Helga asked, stopping.

"Well, he looked as if he looked as if he had dressed in the dark. His belt was even undone. You two aren't very subtle," Phoebe smiled and continued walking.

"So maybe I did. What can I do? He doesn't even try. He just says stuff and my panties are off," Helga said smiling.

"He couldn't possibly be that charming. He's human, not a cartoon character," Phoebe said.

"You know, the charming thing is that he's so oblivious to the fact that he's charming. He just throws compliments at you. And he's so sincere, that's what gets you," Helga said.

"He is quite sweet. I would think that would clash with your… less than sweet demeanor," Phoebe said.

"You would think so. And he is annoying. He drives me crazy. But, I love it. I love when he drives me nuts with the tripping over himself to be polite and empathetic to everything around him" Helga said shrugging her shoulders.

Helga and Phoebe made their way down to their AP English class. Helga found her seat next to Phoebe. Most of the students had already filed in. As the class awaited their instructor Helga took out her notebook and pen. Helga looked up and did not see the teacher. She grabbed her pink journal from the back of the pile. She turned towards a fresh page and dated it. She put the pen to her lips as she started to think how to open this entry.

"Ahem," Helga heard coming from her left. Helga looked up to see Rhonda Lloyd looking intently at Helga.

"What do you want?" Helga snapped at Rhonda.

"I just wanted to talk is all. No need to be all snippy," Rhonda said blithely

"Oh yeah?" Helga asked suspiciously bringing her eyes back down to her journal.

"Yes, listen there are no hard feelings. You won fair and square," Rhonda said.

"What the hell talking about, air head?" Helga asked.

"Everyone knows you and Arnold are dating. We all think it's… 'cute'," she said in a snide tone. Helga still not making eye contact at the comment.

"So?" Helga asked.

"Well there are no hard feelings, is all. It's a little odd since you picked on him for years and years. Some would say you emotionally abused him into liking you somehow. Whatever, I'm not jealous," she added at the tail end.

"Is there a point to this engaging discussion?" Helga deadpanned while still keeping her eyes on her notebook.

"Well, I just want to inform you that I will be having an early graduation party next weekend. I would love to have you and Arnold attend," Rhonda said. "You as well Phoebe," Rhonda said craning her head and catching Phoebe's eye.

"Thank you, Rhonda," Phoebe said politely. "I'm sure we would like to attend," Phoebe finished.

"All of our friends are invited of course. We also have guests from a couple of the other high schools in the city. I like to socialize in a few different social circles and some extend to other schools," Rhonda said

"Isn't' it a bit early to be having graduation parties? You never know, you might not actually graduate" Helga asked

"It is, however, I'll be out of the country come graduation time. As soon as I receive my diploma my family will be traveling to Europe for a couple months. My parents think I need to spend a few months abroad to get a little more culture than I can get in this city. And I agree," Rhonda said haughtily. "And with all my other social engagements and parties coming around that time, I just won't have the time to host something. I figured why bother having a party when everyone else is having a party the same weekend? This way I get to have one big blast and everyone will come," Rhonda said.

"Come to worship at your altar?" Helga said, in a monotone voice.

"I'm sure we'd all love to attend Rhonda," Phoebe chimed in.

"Excellent," Rhonda said. As Rhonda smiled her artificial smile the teacher walked in beginning the class. Helga threw a mocking smile back at Rhonda and turned back to her notebook. As the teacher began her lecture, Helga shuffled back to her school notebook. She started taking notes studiously as the teacher went into her lecture.

The day passed uneventfully as Helga cycled through her regular classes. Helga was walking down the hall absentmindedly smiling. She noticed the looks she was getting from those who knew her. "Can I help you?" she would say to a freshman she met during dancing that stared as she walked by. The boy didn't even respond. Only continued his gait. Helga saw Phoebe making her way down to her last class before lunch. "Hey Phoebes," Helga waved. Phoebe waved back and caught up with her.

"Helga I have wonderful news," Phoebe smiled. Helga noticed all her teeth were showing.

"You know flashing your pearly whites at me could be taken as a sign of aggression," Helga derided.

"If we were apes I would take a swing at you," Phoebe smiled in return.

"So what's the scoop?" Helga asked.

"I got accepted into my second and third choice schools!" Phoebe said beaming.

"That's great Phoebe! Wait, you said third and second? What about Harvard? Isn't that your first?" Helga asked.

"It is, I'm still waiting to hear from them. I fear I may have applied too late," Phoebe said.

"They'll accept you Phoebes. Your grades are perfect. You're awesome and you're probably gonna get valedictorian. They'd be shit school if they didn't," Helga said

"Thank you, Helga," Phoebe said. She smiled assured. She looked back up at Helga. "What about you? Have you heard from your colleges yet?"

"I have. I had to get a couple of letters of recommendations in before I could get the applications in. I got into Boston College and Brown. Still waiting for the safety," Helga said.

"That's wonderful, Helga. You know if you go to Brown we wouldn't be that far from each other. We could see each other on the weekends!" Phoebe said.

"Yeah, it's just a two-hour drive," Helga rolled her eyes. "I could just go to BC and you'd be right across the river from me," Helga said.

"Your first choice is Brown though, isn't it?" Phoebe asked.

"It is. They practically begged me to be in their writing program once they found out who wrote all those recommendations. You were right, I'm really glad I sent in those op-ed pieces. Turns out the editor is crazy connected," Helga said.

"You see what can happen when you let others see your work? I'm happy for you," Phoebe said.

"Thanks. I'm feeling pretty good these days. You know, despite everything," Helga said. They continued their journey down the hall.

"I've noticed. You seem to have greatly improved your demeanor. It's very noticeable," Phoebe said.

"Is that why these sheep keep staring at me?" Helga said waving her arms referencing the whole student body.

"Well Helga, some people only see the less than affable version of you. They're not used to your recently pleasant moods," Phoebe said.

"Well it's weird, right?" Helga said. Helga stopped, causing Phoebe to stop. She turned and looked at her best friend. "I just have this overwhelming lightness these days. I don't know where it comes from. I'm not like that at all," Helga said. Helga saw the big smile appear on her face.

"Well Helga, could it be that the strengths of your many accomplishments be giving you this new found buoyancy?" Phoebe asked.

"Maybe," Helga said.

"Could it be a certain cornflower haired boy you've been dating?" Phoebe asked.

Helga looked down at her. "Is the Football Head rubbing off on me? I have been a lot less angry these past few weeks. Even that forced detour into the hospital was bearable because he was there," Helga thought to herself. "Maybe that's what it is," Helga said as she and Phoebe began walking again.

The women walked until Helga and Phoebe stopped at their class. She looked down at Phoebe. Phoebe looked concerned at the introspective look Helga wore. "You know Phoebes, it's weird. You've always been there for me. But you're the only one. I've never let anyone else really be there for me. It feels good to have him there with me when I'm feeling like crap, or some incident happens with Miriam or Bob," Helga said. Phoebe smiled.

"Well, that's good Helga. It's good to let people in," Phoebe said. "In more ways than one, I'd imagine," Phoebe winked at Helga getting a laugh. Helga smiled. Suddenly Helga's face dropped. Her eyes traveled to the side as her shoulders slumped.

"All this time you've been there for me and I've never said thank you," Helga began. Helga struggled to get her words out. Phoebe smiled back at her.

"I'll always be there for you, Helga," Phoebe said.

"I know you will," Helga said. She put her hands in front of her as if she were confessing. "Having someone else there makes me appreciate you all the more. You're my best friend, and I…," Helga trailed off as she took a large breath and collected herself. She looked into Phoebe's brown eyes and said: " I love Phoebes." Phoebe smiled at Helga.

"I love you too Helga," Phoebe said. Helga motioned her arm to let Phoebe in first. Helga followed behind her so they could begin their class.

Their day kept going as it usually did. Phoebe and Helga finished their class and headed towards the lunch room. "I'm starving," Helga said. The two opened the double doors and looked around. Gerald and Arnold were sitting with Sid. Arnold looked up and saw them, he threw his large arm up and waved them over.

"Well hey there dumb dumb," Helga said to Arnold as she bent forward and kissed him. Phoebe leaned forward and did the same to her boyfriend. To the disgust of Sid, who sat and made faces as he swung his gaze between Arnold and Helga and Gerald and Phoebe. "What are you looking at?" Helga snarled at Sid.

"Nothing," he said as he said snapping his head to attention. "I think I'd rather not be a fifth wheel," Sid said, standing up.

"Funny, I was just thinking the same thing," Helga said as she smiled at Sid. Sid walked to another table without another word. Helga and Phoebe walked away from the table to gather their food and came back to the boys' table.

"Gerald! Rhonda invited us to a party she's having next weekend," Phoebe said to Gerald as she sat. Helga had already started digging into her wrap.

"You wanna go?" Gerald asked.

"Possibly. It might be nice to see all of our old friends. At least once more before we graduate and move on," Phoebe said.

"We see them every day," Helga said, mouth full of chicken salad.

"Yes but never outside of school. In our neighborhood, we would play baseball, hang out around Mighty Pete, or find ourselves in some other sort of shenanigans. That's not really the case anymore," Phoebe lamented.

"Well we got older and our interests change," Arnold said. "I don't really do baseball anymore. Plus I know a lot of people through the basketball team or weight lifting," Arnold said.

"I think it would be a wonderful opportunity to be around our friends once more before the summer rush hits and we're all too busy working or preparing for school in the fall. Plus we get the chance to mingle with some of the other high school kids in the city. Apparently, Rhonda is very socially connected throughout the schools," Phoebe said.

"I miss when Phoebe was shy," Helga thought to herself. "That's just what I want is to see, a whole gaggle of people kissing Rhonda's ass," Helga said sarcastically.

"We might get to dance together again," Arnold said

Helga squinted and smiled at Arnold. "I would like that," Helga said.

"We'd all be there," Arnold said.

"Even Gerald?" Helga said mockingly. Arnold chuckled and stopped when he looked at Gerald.

"I'll think about it," She pointed her eyes at Arnold. The meal continued as Gerald and Arnold finished their meal. Helga looked over at Arnold who was talking about basketball with Gerald. "You'll need something to do other than puttering around your studio all alone," Helga said. When she realized what she had said her eyes widened.

"What studio?" Gerald asked.

"I meant his room," Helga said immediately. Helga froze for a moment and then went back to her wrap as if nothing happened. Arnold was looking up at the ceiling and moving his head to the side trying to let the question pass.

"No you didn't, there's something else going on. Come on, what studio? What's she talking about, man?" Gerald said slapping Arnold's arm lightly with the back of his hand.

Arnold glared at Helga for a moment. Helga put down her wrap and changed the subject. "So Phoebe got into most of the schools she applied to," Helga said a little too quickly.

"Really? That's awesome!" Gerald said taking Phoebe's face into his face and kissing her forehead.

"Helga did as well!" Phoebe said brightly.

"That's amazing, did you impress them with your discretion?" Arnold said pointedly to Helga.

"There are lots of things that they liked about me," Helga said with a nervous smile, glad Gerald had taken the bait.

Arnold leaned forward and kissed her on the cheek, a smile breaking through the glare. "Seriously, congrats. I'm proud of you, Helga," Arnold said his smile visible across the room.

"There's my Arnold," Helga thought to herself. "Thanks," Helga said. Her face turning red and stomach starting to fill with butterflies at his smile.

"What about you? Which schools have you heard back from?" Helga asked as she finished up her wrap and wiped her mouth.

"I haven't really heard back from any…" Arnold said as he trailed off. "Gerald got into Howard like he wanted," Arnold quickly deflected.

"That's wonderful!" Phoebe exclaimed. She threw her arms around Gerald and kissed his cheek. "I told you that you would," Phoebe said

"Hold up, what places did you apply to?" Helga asked, not letting go of the question. Arnold sat quietly for a moment. He seemed to be searching for an answer. Arnold looked around once more, searching for a lifeline. "Well?" Helga asked. Phoebe looked on while Gerald shook his head knowingly.

"I didn't apply to anywhere," Arnold said in a low voice. He bowed his head, not wanting to meet Helga's eyes.

"Your Dad's gonna kill, you when he finds out. You know that right?" Gerald said.

"Yeah, just one more reason I don't want to talk to him these days," Arnold said. He suddenly stood and grabbed his bag. "I'll see you guys later," Arnold waved to Gerald and Phoebe and bent forward and kissed Helga on the cheek faintly, still unable to meet her eyes. Off he was as if he were running late to his next class.

Helga sat there unable to piece together where her lunch had gone downhill. "What the hell was that?" Helga asked. "I thought he talked with his dad about school," Helga said. Gerald shook his head confirming Helga's suspicion. "Oh crap," Helga said.

"I've tried to talk to him about it. But he just clams up," Gerald said. He leaned back in his chair. He looked defeated. Just as Helga started to think the bell rang and lunch hour had finished. Helga looked worryingly over to Phoebe. She nodded to Helga as if they shared one mind. "I'll see you guys later," Helga stood and hurried to the door. She looked up and down halls, hoping Arnold hadn't gotten too far away. He was nowhere to be found. She took out her phone and started typing out a message to him.

Hey, you can't bolt like that without talking to me, she wrote and sent. She started to walk towards her next class. She felt a buzz in her hand and looked down.

Sorry was late for class, Arnold sent back.

No, you weren't the bell hadn't rung, dummy, Helga typed back. Helga made it all the way back to her penultimate class of the day and sat. She looked again at her phone. Arnold had not sent a message back. Don't ignore me Football Head. We need to talk. She sent the message and put the phone on her desk.

The class began and Helga started to take her notes. She kept looking at her phone waiting for the screen to light up with a reply from her boyfriend. There was no response from Arnold and Helga started to worry. "I hope he's alright. I didn't mean to put him on the spot. I didn't know he was procrastinating on college," Helga said to herself. "I really hope he's not mad at me. I shouldn't have mentioned the studio. I'm so stupid," she said to herself over and over.

The class ended. As Helga gathered her things to head to her last class of the day, she looked once more at her phone. Arnold had not responded. "God this makes me fucking crazy," Helga said to herself. Her pleasant mood starting to wane as she was getting silence from her boyfriend.

Helga entered the hallway and turned towards her last class. She paced heavily down the hallway, the anxiety turning to anger. She looked up to see a tall, goofy, cornflower haired giant. Her face screwed into a scowl as he got closer. She planted her feet directly in his path. He had his eyes focused on the ground. He didn't notice her until she placed a hand on his chest and pushed him back.

"H-Helga!" Arnold said in shock.

"Oh did I interrupt your contemplative floor staring?" Helga asked in a harsh tone.

"Sorry I didn't respond. I was in class and didn't want to get my phone taken or anything," Arnold started to babble. He had his hand on the back of his head. His shoulders slumped and was speaking like he was trying to explain why he was speeding.

"Arnold, stop talking," Helga interrupted. Arnold went quiet as if his mother were going to lecture him. "What was that, at lunch? You just shut down and wouldn't talk to me. I don't like when you don't talk to me," Helga demanded.

Arnold looked back down at the floor. He was doing everything he could to not look at Helga. "It wasn't…" Arnold started to say. "I just… I don't want to talk about this. I gotta go, Helga," Arnold said. He sidestepped Helga and started to walk away. Helga grabbed his arm to keep him from leaving.

"Arnold talk to me!" Helga said. Arnold's gait did not break and pulled his arm back.

"I gotta go, Helga," Arnold said with a scowl on his face now.

Helga was taken aback. Seeing Arnold act this way was new to her. Helga clenched her fist and bared her teeth. She marched right behind Arnold and slapped him in the back of the head. "Ah" he yelled. Attracting the attention of rest of the people in the hallway. Helga grabbed Arnold 's ear and pulled it towards her.

"You do not just walk away from me, buddy boy!" Helga proceeded to pull Arnold down the hall. Arnold, hooting in pain the entire way. She almost threw Arnold's head into the room when she found an empty class. Arnold straightened himself, rubbing his red ear in pain.

"Helga are you insane?" He managed to get out before Helga began her rant.

"Listen, pal. I don't know who the hell you think you're messing with but I will not be made to think I'm crazy because you won't answer your damn text messages," Helga yelled.

"Oh yeah because me not answering made you crazy. Maybe you're crazy because you pull people by the ear into empty rooms to yell at them!" Arnold said matching her intensity and still rubbing his ear.

"Oh no, don't act like this is anyone's fault but your own. If you could grow some balls talk to me and stop trying to be Mr. Perfect all the time I wouldn't have to do stuff like that," Helga yelled.

"What the hell are you talking about Helga? No one was acting, I just… I just didn't want to talk about it!" Arnold shouted at her.

"Oh yeah, the silent treatment plus a perfectly dramatic storm off. That's really mature," Helga yelled back. "I wouldn't press this but you're clearly upset about it," Helga finished.

"Since when do you care about peoples' feelings?" Arnold rebutted.

"I don't care about peoples' feelings, I care about yours. I love you, you fucking meathead. I want to know what's bothering you," Helga moved closer to Arnold. She reached out to touch his arm. Arnold pulled his arm away as he turned his body to walk closer to the opposite wall. Helga scowled in frustration. "Arnold you talk to me about everything that I'm upset about. It can't be a one way street like that. Talk to me," Helga pleaded.

"I don't want you to have to listen to my issues," Arnold said in a low voice.

"It's not having to, it's just doing it. Since when do you not talk to me about your issues? You're not a superhero, Arnold. You can't sponge up all my bullshit and not expect that I wouldn't want to do the same with you. You're not any less to me if you're pissed about something!" Helga said as her voice started to rise again.

"Well, we don't have to worry about that now do we? I'm not perfect. There you go. Are you happy?" Arnold yelled, his voice becoming more frantic. "You're boyfriend is a damn failure!" Arnold yelled back at her.

"You think that's true?" Helga said.

"Isn't it? I can't bring myself to talk to you, or my dad. Or my mom for that matter," Arnold yelled. He started to pace around the room, unsure what to do with himself. "I can't live up to what my dad expects of me. I don't measure up to that level. That's what's killing Helga. I need to be this amazing intellectual to my parents. I have to the perfectly compassionate doormat to my friends, I can't just cant! There are you happy now? That's my weakness. People think I'm so much more than what I am. I don't…." Arnold trailed off. His voice started to crack. "I don't even know who I am half the time," Arnold finally said. Arnold slumped against the wall and fell to a seated position. Helga looked at him for a long time. Arnold's staring match with the floor continued. "All I am are people's expectations of me. I'm just a ticking time bomb of disappointment. I can't make anyone happy," Arnold said quietly.

Helga silently sat next to him. They sat there for a while. Arnold gathered his thoughts. Helga had only seen Arnold yell and get upset like this a couple times in their relationship. It was as hard to deal with as it was rare.

"I just didn't want you to be disappointed in me too," Arnold finally said. "That's why I didn't want to have this conversation. The truth is, there are a lot of things that I want. But none of them are what others want for me," Arnold said.

"You think I'm disappointed in you?" Helga asked softly.

"Aren't you?" Arnold asked.

"No. I don't care what you do after high school. I just want a future where you're happy. I just want you to do what it is that you want. Not what everyone else wants. I want a future where you are you, and maybe a future I could play a part in," Helga said. Arnold sighed heavily and looked down at her. Finally able to meet her eyes. Helga felt a pain in her chest seeing the bright green eyes she loved so much filled with so much sadness.

"Arnold, why are you afraid to talk to your dad?" Helga asked.

Arnold looked up and across the empty room. Helga waited for her answer. Arnold was quiet. Helga saw this face a lot. "His emotions are a hurricane and he's just trying to put together the most diplomatic thing to say. He only wants to blame himself. He couldn't possibly blame anyone else. All the successes are because of someone else. All the mistakes are his. Why'd I go for the complicated one?" Helga thought to herself. "Arnold, just says it," Helga said.

"I don't want him to be disappointed with me. I only want to make him happy. He's done all these amazing things, and I have to live up to them. The thing is… I don't want to," Arnold said.

"Then don't. Do what you want to do," Helga said.

"You don't get it," Arnold said.

"Then help me get it. What are you so afraid will happen if you decided to live your own life?" Helga asked.

Arnold looked again across the room. He was quiet. His face stoic. Helga started to feel afraid again. Helga nudged him gently. He looked down at her. His eyes were wet as if he could burst into tears any second.

"I don't want them to leave again," Arnold said. Helga saw the tracks of tears on his face. Helga felt her own eyes fill with tears seeing him like this. It ached to see her love in pain.

"Arnold, you know what happened when you were younger wasn't your fault right?" Helga said. "It was an accident," Helga said.

Arnold looked up at the ceiling. "Wasn't it? I was the interruption to their lives. If I was enough, why didn't they stay?" Arnold said. Arnold looked down at Helga, their eyes meeting once more. Helga saw him trying to hold himself together.

"Arnold, you know that their leaving had nothing to do with you. They went and did exactly what they wanted, they wanted to help those people. They were following what they wanted to do, just like you should be doing. They left you behind because they were going to the jungle. Nothing more," Helga said. Arnold remained quiet as if he were unconvinced.

"Arnold, what happened on that last trip had nothing to do with you. Them leaving had nothing to do with you either. That was their choice. Now you have to make yours," Helga said. Arnold lifted his head again, the wheels in his head turning.

Arnold remained quiet, for a long time. The late bell had rung some time ago. Helga was pretty sure she and Arnold were skipping class at that point. Arnold continued thinking silently. "I don't know what else I could tell him to make him feel better," Helga thought to herself.

"Usually this is the part where I have a panic attack," Arnold finally said. "I guess I'm calmer talking about this with you," Arnold said. He looked at Helga with a small smirk. Helga smiled back at him.

"At least you're having the conversation. That's a step," Helga said playfully nudging Arnold. Arnold smiled at her. "To be clear, I could never be disappointed in you. I just wish you'd stop trying to live up to what you think I think of you and see yourself how I see you," Helga said.

"How's that?" Arnold asked.

"Like the most wonderful person I know. Not because you try to be, but because you are," Helga said.

"Thanks, Helga," Arnold said. The room was quiet again. Helga looked up at Arnold, searching for the glint in his eyes. Arnold looked down one more time at her. The fear and sadness in his eyes abating. The light in his eyes on full display.

"There's my Arnold," Helga said to herself. She grabbed his arm and wrapped it around her shoulder, and scooted herself closer to him. Arnold brought his other arm to bring her closer to him. He kissed her forehead and nuzzled her hair.

"Just so that I'm clear," Arnold said. "I couldn't possibly see my future without you," Arnold said.

Helga smiled and hugged him tighter. "Good," she said. They held each other for a long time. The afternoon going by with them alone in an unlit class. They felt like the last two people on Earth. "I just want to stay in his arms," Helga said to herself.

The last bell of the day rung rousing Arnold and Helga out of their euphoric embrace. "I guess we should get going," Arnold said.

"I guess," Helga said. They reluctantly let go of each other to stand. Helga grabbed her bag she had thrown down in anger. She slung it over her shoulder. She suddenly felt arms wrap around her waist. Arnold lifted her by her waist into a soft, passionate kiss. Their lips did not part for some time. Arnold rested his forehead against hers.

"Thank you, Helga," Arnold said. "For everything. You always know how to make me feel better," Arnold said softly. He kissed her once more and put her down on her feet.

"Anytime, Football Head," Helga said.

They walked into the hallway, hand in hand. They made their way to the parking lot among the crowd of flowing students. Helga made sure to keep his hand in hers as they walked. Determined not to let him go. They came closer to the exit and saw Gerald and Phoebe.

"Hey man!" Gerald waved them over. Arnold and Helga walked towards them.

"Hey, Gerald!" Arnold and Gerald exchanged their usual handshake.

"Are you alright man? You seemed pretty out of it earlier," Gerald asked.

Arnold tightened his grip on Helga's hand. He turned his head towards her and he smiled. Helga returned the smile to him.

"Oh yeah, I'm much better now," Arnold said. Gerald nodded and the four teenagers made their way to the parking lot.