Chapter song: Serpents by Sharon Van Etten

There had to be something terribly wrong with me, and I began seriously worrying about my state of mind. The harder I tried not to think about Ronan, the more I did. I imagined holding his hand, and one thought led to another. Soon, I was wondering what he looked like underneath his armor and how his pouty, sculpted lips would feel against mine. It was like I was trapped in a speeding car and no matter how hard I pushed on the break, it remained on its collision course, bound to burn.

I blamed it on my hormones. Why else would I unexpectedly start to think of Ronan this way? Sure, he's the epitome of masculinity, probably stronger than Superman, and his voice… OK, snap out of it.

This man has repeatedly tortured me, almost raped me, and is keeping me here against my will. I should feel nothing but hatred for him, but I didn't and that's what scared me the most. Despite all of the terrible things he has done, he has also shown me unexpected generosity by treating my wounds, feeding me gourmet meals, and housing me in a luxury suite. Plus, he didn't rape me when I told him I was a virgin and he genuinely seemed concerned about me tonight. These were not the acts of an evil man and it made me curious to know what motivated his behavior. Could it be possible that he cares for me? The thought made my heart race and my stomach flutter with excitement, but I didn't know why.

I didn't sleep very well that night.

I was already awake and dressed when Nebula walked into my room the next morning. I sat on the edge of the bed, vacantly staring at the floor as thoughts consumed my mind. I was suddenly pulled out of my daydream when I felt Nebula's rough hand push my shoulder back, causing me to almost fall off of the bed.

"I said LET'S GO," she shouted, her voice sounding strangely mechanical. She abruptly turned around and began marching out of the room without waiting for me. I slowly stood up and began following her, feeling slightly delirious as I did so. My lack of sleep was already making me feel like a zombie.

"What about breakfast?" I said tiredly as I jogged behind her. She didn't answer me of course, which only irritated me even further. If I didn't eat breakfast how the hell was I supposed to survive training today?

We entered the training room and immediately Nebula ordered me to practice my moves on the wall pads. I sluggishly walked over to the wall and began throwing punches and kicks, but I lacked the vigor I had yesterday so my hits were weak. Nebula seemed to notice this right away and angrily walked over to me.

"What the hell is this? You aren't even trying," she said sharply as she glared at me.

"Well, maybe if I had some food…" I grumbled, stopping to face her.

She didn't say a word as she pushed me backwards against the wall with her forearm against my neck, forcing me to stand on my tiptoes. I stood there trying to pull her arm away from my neck, but she was too strong.

"Ronan might tolerate this type of behavior, but I will not. I am not afraid to hurt you Terran, so don't give me a reason to," she said coldly as she let me go.

I took a deep breath and stumbled forward as the balls of my feet made contact with the floor. As she walked away from me I massaged my neck, which was surely going to be bruised in a few hours. I angrily glared at Nebula but didn't say anything; instead, I took out my frustration on the wall pad in front of me and began furiously striking it, causing Nebula to chuckle behind me. For the next two hours she had me repeatedly hit the wall pad until my strikes were near-perfect. My knuckles, elbows, and feet were severely aching and burning after only a few minutes, but I was too scared of Nebula to stop.

The rest of the day proceeded much like it had yesterday, only today Nebula began teaching me submission and grappling techniques. Once again I was left feeling slow and stupid as Nebula maneuvered herself out of every hold I had on her. After three hours of wrestling I was able to pin her down ten times, but even then it only lasted for a few seconds. As she twisted herself out of my last choke hold, I rolled over onto my back panting with exhaustion. Nebula stood over me pursing her lips in disappointment.

"It's time for a break," she said grudgingly as she lifted me up. She led me through the hall until we reached a familiar door. "I'll be back in an hour. Do not be late," she said as she pushed me inside and closed the door behind me.

It was the same room I ate breakfast in with Ronan yesterday. However, instead of breakfast foods, the table was filled with an assortment of meats, cheeses, and breads. I also spotted a few trays of fruit which I immediately began walking over to. I glanced at the head of the table, remembering how last time Ronan surprised me, but his chair was empty today. I found myself strangely disappointed by his absence. I walked around the table and began eating directly from the large platters of food, happily humming as I did so. My lips were wrapped around a plump peach-like fruit when I heard slow, heavy footsteps behind me. I remained facing forward as I finished biting into the syrupy fruit, which produced an embarrassing slurping sound as the juice filled my mouth.

"This is considered a fine delicacy on my planet," he said slowly over my head. I could feel my heart hammering away inside my chest.

In the corner of my eye I saw his hand reach past my side, slightly brushing my arm as he grabbed an identical fruit from the tray. I flinched from the unexpected contact which caused my back to bump into his midriff, and I felt my body grow hot with embarrassment. I quietly cleared my throat as I stepped away from him and began walking around to the opposite side of the table, carefully avoiding eye contact as I did so. I stood on the opposite side of the table and casually poured myself a drink, filling my goblet to the brim with a deep, purple liquid. My hands were shaking with nervousness as I placed the pitcher back down onto the table, completely aware of Ronan's unwavering and intimidating watchfulness.

I brought the goblet up to my lips and slowly began sipping on the rich liquid, surprised to find that it tasted like wine. I closed my eyes and savored the familiar warm feeling in my throat as I swallowed the tangy liquid. As I stood there eagerly drinking the rich, hot wine, I saw Ronan walking around the table in the corner of my eye. I didn't care though. I just wanted to get drunk and forget that I imagined kissing him.

"That is enough," he said in an authoritative tone. By then my goblet was almost empty, and my face felt considerably hotter. I heard him approaching me from the side, and I quickly began walking away from him finishing the remainder of my drink.

I winced at the burning sensation in my chest and set my empty goblet down on the table with more force than I meant to. I closed my eyes at the sound of Ronan angrily approaching me from behind. So far I had been successful at avoiding eye contact with him and I was grateful because I didn't trust myself at the moment. Thinking about touching him made me nervous and excited, but I knew it was wrong. It had to be wrong.

Suddenly, I felt his large hand grip my shoulder as he quickly spun me around to face him, and my hands naturally began pushing him away as I stepped backwards. I felt my back press against the table as Ronan continued to advance towards me. I didn't have anywhere to go except under the table, so I quickly dropped to my knees to crawl away. Before my palms even touched the floor, I felt his hand wrap itself in my hair and pull me upwards, causing me to yelp in pain. His hand reached behind me and a second later I heard the sound of trays crashing onto the floor. He roughly lifted me onto the table and placed himself in between my legs which dangled off the edge of the table. I sat there in front of him, too afraid to open my eyes.

"Get away from me," I whined with my eyes tightly shut.

"I've had enough of your impudence," he growled harshly from above me. "Look at me," he demanded in a dangerously quiet voice.

I shook my head with my eyes still closed and prayed that he would just leave me alone. I heard him growl as he grabbed me by my hair once again and roughly pulled my head backwards. Before I could stop myself, my eyes slowly opened up and right away I was met with Ronan's piercing, purple eyes. It was a mistake opening my eyes because I was instantly reminded why I was attracted to him. His eyes truly were beautiful, filled with brilliant luminosity, and I felt I could get lost in them. He was both beautiful and overwhelmingly masculine, and the confidence in which he carried himself was undeniably attractive.

I could tell the wine was beginning to affect me because my head felt heavier, my vision became a little fuzzy, and I felt my body grow hotter. I wasn't sure though if that was because of the wine or because Ronan was standing in between my legs. I suddenly felt a desperate need to get away from him as I began feeling unfamiliar and dangerous urges. Never before had I ever yearned for a man as I did now, and my arousal was growing by the second. I had to get away from him, now. My hands reached up to his hand which was still wrapped in my hair and I began frantically trying to get him to let go.

"Get your hands off of me!" I cried irritably, trying to pry his fingers open so he would relinquish his grip.

He frowned at me with obvious disapproval as I continued to pull at his hand. In a desperate attempt to get away I reached out and slapped him across the face as hard as I could. He barely even blinked as I hit him, clearly not at all hurt or affected by my touch. I may as well have hit him with a feather, but he became incensed nonetheless.

His left hand seized me by the neck while his other hand remained in my hair, and he roughly pushed me backwards so I was lying flat on my back. As he leaned over me with all of his weight in between my legs, I felt an overwhelming sense of pleasure in my core, and I couldn't hold back my arousal any longer. As he pressed forward my back naturally arched and I softly moaned at the wonderful sensation.

I instantly looked up at Ronan, completely mortified by what just happened, and saw him looking down at me with surprised eyes, undoubtedly perplexed. I was hoping the sound would go unnoticed, but I was sadly disappointed.

"I-I…th..." I stuttered nervously as I couldn't seem to form any words in my mind. I could feel my cheeks flushing with shame.

Ronan removed his hand from my neck and placed it next to my head, while his other hand remained wrapped in my hair. He supported himself on his hand as he slightly lifted himself up, still leaning over me. His head slowly tilted downwards so he was observing his position in between my legs, and his eyes drifted back to my face. He looked at me knowingly with heavy eyes as his lips curved into a sly smile.

Before I could say anything, he leaned into my core more forcefully this time, grinding his hips as he did so, and I heard myself cry out in pleasure as he moved against my sensitive flesh. When he stopped I opened my eyes, now breathing heavily with arousal, and saw him smirking at me. I realized my legs were wrapped around his waist, pulling him closer to me. I immediately let my legs drop down to the edge of the table, embarrassed by my unchaste behavior.

"Stop," I said in a quiet, trembling voice. I knew this wasn't right, but I honestly didn't want him to stop. Sensing my inner struggle, he released his grip on my hair and lowered himself so his mouth was right next to my ear.

"Swear your loyalty to me, and I will give you what you need," he purred darkly into my ear. He made me shiver with just the sound of his voice. I suddenly felt nervous as his other hand started to slowly move down my body.

As his fingers reached my waist, he looked at me intensely and reached in between my legs, cupping my soft mound with his large hand over my pants. I gasped at the unfamiliar feeling of being touched down there by another person and instinctively reached down to pull his hand away. He grabbed my wrists with his other hand and pinned them above my head as he stared at me confidently. I glanced nervously between his hand and his face, unsure of what to do.

His fingers began slowly moving up and down my folds, causing me to squirm and whimper in his grasp. I looked up at him nervously biting my lip as he stared back, determined to conquest my mind. As his fingers found my aching bud, I closed my eyes and moaned loudly with pleasure as he began expertly rubbing me from the outside of my pants. My hips pushed into his hand as my body yearned for release.

"Swear to me," he said more demandingly as I whimpered underneath him.

"I...I...," I muttered, stopping when I felt his hand begin to slide underneath the top of my pants.

"No," I said, suddenly becoming frightened. His hand continued to move downwards and I began kicking my legs at him.

"Ronan, stop," I said loudly. His hand stopped immediately and he looked up at me clearly irritated.

"I don't want to do this. Get off," I said shakily, my body still slightly trembling with arousal.

Ronan remained leaning over me, silently staring down at me with his fiery eyes, and I noticed his jaw was tightly clenched. My heart hammered away in my chest as he continued to stare at me like he was waiting for me to change my mind. I softly shook my head and looked away, now feeling ashamed for what I had allowed to transpire. He angrily growled as he withdrew his hand from my pants and stepped backwards away from me. I slowly sat up and saw him standing turned sideways, looking away from me. He turned his head in my direction and I felt myself involuntarily tremble from the scornful look he was giving me. He silently turned away from me and began walking out of the room, leaving me sitting there on the table feeling confused and hurt.

I hopped down from the table as I continued to watch him exit through the door. When he was no longer visible, I felt more alone and vulnerable than I ever had before. This man, who was the first to ever touch me so intimately, just left me standing here alone, without saying a word. How could I have been so stupid to let that happen? I never felt so naïve before in my life.

Five minutes later Nebula walked into the room, stopping when she saw all the trays scattered across the floor. She scowled at me as she placed her hands on her hips, and cocked her head to the side in annoyance.

"Your species are barbaric," she said with contempt as she walked towards me.

"I didn't-," I started to say, but Nebula roughly grabbed my arm and began pulling me away.

"I don't want to hear it, Terran. Break time is over," she said as she led me through the hallways.

She put me to work as soon as we entered the room, and within minutes my body was once again covered in sweat. For the next three hours we grappled, wrestled, and engaged in hand-to-hand combat. After our lengthy melee, every inch of my body felt sore and bruised and I couldn't wait to take a hot bath and soak my tender body.

"You did better today," Nebula said unemotionally as she led me to my room. "Your pathetic human body is getting stronger," she said without glancing back.

"Um, thanks. I guess," I said quietly behind her as we approached my room. She entered a code into the control pad and I quickly walked into my room, feeling exhausted and emotionally drained.

When I heard the door close behind me, I began stripping my sweat-soaked clothes off and threw them into the corner of my room. I walked into the bathroom and headed straight for the large, metal tub. As it began filling with hot, steaming water, I eagerly pressed down on several pumps until it was full of bubbles that smelled like jasmine and honeysuckle. While I waited for the bath to fill, I walked over to the large cabinet by the sink and began exploring its contents. I languidly inspected the drawers, only finding linens and toilet paper, but my interest immediately perked as I opened the last drawer. Inside was an assortment of glass vials filled with pills and ointments, each individually labeled in a language I could not interpret.

After several minutes of probing around I was ready to close the drawer, until one vial caught my eye. My hand eagerly picked up the vial as I recognized the white pills inside, and I felt beyond relieved as I imagined the tranquility they could offer me. My body was hurting all over and I couldn't stop thinking about my confusing moment with Ronan earlier.

What I needed most right now was to not feel anything at all. I popped one of the pills into my mouth and walked over to the sink, cupping my hands underneath the water faucet until they were full. I drank from my hands and swallowed the small piece of heaven, ready to forget about all of my troubles. By now the tub was nearly filled to the brim and I quickly walked over to turn the water off.

I stepped into the tub and sighed at the wonderful feeling of warmth encompassing my entire body. I closed my eyes and inhaled the intoxicating aroma, and let my head float on top of the water as I felt my body relax. As my ears became submerged, all I could hear was the sound of air entering and leaving my lungs. I became so focused on my breathing that I unknowingly began drifting off to sleep.

My hand grasped the cold, brass doorknob of my home and I excitedly pushed the door open and began looking for my parents. My face dropped as I realized something about this place did not feel right. My house always felt cheerful and inviting, but now there was an overbearing sadness that filled my chest with dread. I continued up the stairs, stopping halfway when I heard soft, feminine weeping coming from my bedroom. My feet moved of their own accord as my heart began beating frantically in my chest. As I approached the door, it slowly opened on its own and made a loud, creaking noise.

I entered the room, but there was no one in there. I turned around to leave, but stopped and screamed with shock as I saw a man front of me. My hand flew to my chest and I closed my eyes in relief as I realized it was my dad. I smiled and started walking towards him with my arms open, but he held his hands up to stop me.

"You need to go back," he said urgently, grabbing me by my shoulders. I looked at him feeling confused and offended by his greeting.

"But I just got here," I said, baffled by his behavior. All of a sudden I felt a sharp, crushing pain in my chest and I doubled over gasping for air.

"You're dying," I heard a sad voice say behind me. I quickly turned around and saw my mother standing behind me, her eyes shining with tears as she looked at me.

"Mom," I whispered as I stepped towards her. I barely even took two steps as I felt another painful stab in my chest, causing me to drop down to my knees.

"Wake up, Silvia," my dad said frantically from behind me. I looked up at my mom who was nodding her head in agreement.

"I don't want to leave. I just got you back," I said crying as I stood back up and turned to face both of them.

"You will die if you don't go now," my mother wailed. I stared at her in disbelief as my body became deathly cold. Once again I experienced an excruciating pressure in my chest and could feel myself slipping away.

Everything started to become blurry and within seconds I could no longer see my parents. I was surrounded by a thick, suffocating darkness I had never experienced before. I suddenly became aware that I was lying on a cold, hard floor and my body felt strangely wet and freezing. In the distance I heard someone calling my name and I began following the sound, hoping for a way out of this place. Visions of blue and purple danced before my eyes as I started to wake up.

I tried to breathe but I instantly started choking and immediately felt two large hands push me onto my side. My eyes popped open as I began violently coughing up water, which I could feel running out of my mouth and down my chin. For the next few minutes I was in excruciating pain as water flowed from both my nose and mouth, and all I could think about was getting fresh air. My throat and lungs burned so badly that breathing was almost impossible, and I could hear myself gasping as my body struggled to inhale.

I felt someone's hand gently brush the hair from my face as I continued fighting for air. I lied there for a while until I began breathing normally again, and then I became aware that I was extremely cold and dripping wet. I looked up for the first time fully conscious and saw Ronan kneeling next to me on the floor, staring at me intently. My teeth began chattering uncontrollably as my body shook from the cold, and I slowly sat up and began rubbing my arms. I instantly realized that I was naked and looked up at Ronan flushing with embarrassment as I covered myself with my hands. He quickly draped a warm, silky towel around my back and wrapped it around my body, never breaking eye contact as he did so.

Without a word he bent over and smoothly scooped me up in his arms, slowly carrying me out of the bathroom bridal-style. I naturally leaned into his chest, enjoying the comfort that his strength provided for me at the moment. It felt surprisingly nice to be in his strong arms, and I was genuinely surprised by his gracefulness. When we reached the bed he gently set me down and pulled the covers over me. My hand quickly reached underneath the covers and pulled the wet towel off, throwing it to the side of the bed.

His eyes glanced at the discarded towel on the floor as he sat down next to me, and his hand placed something on my nightstand. My head turned to the side and I recognized the small glass vial which contained the mind-numbing pills.

"I didn't know the pill would make me pass out like that," I croaked, sounding like a middle-aged smoker.

"You nearly drowned," he said harshly, causing me to tremble. I didn't understand why he was getting so upset. I was fine now and that's all that mattered.

"It was an accident," I muttered, looking down with shame. My fingers absently began playing with the sheets, helping to distract me from Ronan's disappointed stare.

"A minute later and you would have been dead," he seethed, his voice dripping with anger.

"I'm sorry," I whispered as I looked back up at him. "Thank you for saving me," I said sincerely with teary eyes. His expression seemed to soften as he stared at me, and he quickly turned his head away looking annoyed.

"Ronan," I said quietly, waiting for him to look at me. His head slightly turned in my direction as he stared at me from the corner of his eyes.

"Will you stay with me until I fall asleep?" I asked timidly. I knew I was pushing it, but after everything that happened I didn't want to be alone.

"You are acting like a child," he said in a disdainful tone as he frowned at me.

"Fine. Then leave," I replied tiredly. I sure as hell didn't want him staying if he was just going to insult me.

"Do not command me," he growled as he turned his body towards mine in a threatening manner. I rolled my eyes, annoyed by his need to prove himself more powerful, and pulled the sheets up to my chin. In my peripheral vision I could see him staring at me while my fingers nervously played with my hair. I heard him make a quiet hissing sound and I quickly glanced up to see him raise his chin and look away.

"This will not happen again after tonight," he said angrily while still looking away.

I watched in awe as he walked over to the other side of the bed and began positioning himself on the mattress. As he pulled his legs onto the bed and sat up with his back against the headboard, I couldn't help but stare at him with amazement. When I saw his head turn to look down at me, I quickly looked away and pulled the sheets tighter over my body. Although he was sitting on top of the covers, it felt strange to be lying in bed naked with Ronan next to me – especially now that he has seen me naked. Oddly enough, I didn't feel ashamed or embarrassed by this. Now seems as good a time as any to discuss what happened in the dining room.

"About earlier today…" I said quietly while fidgeting with the comforter.

"There is no need to discuss it," he interjected irritably. I glanced up to my left and saw him staring resentfully at the wall straight ahead.

"I liked it," I whispered softly before I could think about it. I saw his eyes slightly flicker in my direction, obviously surprised by my words, but he continued staring straight ahead.

"It felt so…," I said, unable to finish. I was going to say amazing, orgasmic, explosive, and more but I was too embarrassed, so I sighed pleasantly instead. I saw the corner of Ronan's mouth turn up slightly in a smirk.

"But I don't know you and honestly you confuse the hell out of me. One minute you're choking me and then you're saving my life. Plus, I'm a… well you know," I said awkwardly. "I don't know about this galaxy but on Earth that's a pretty big deal. It's just not how I plann-," I said before Ronan's hand covered my mouth. I glanced up and saw him staring at me frustratedly with his eyebrows furrowed slightly.

"Your incessant drivel is tiresome," he said with a irritated grimace. "You have made your point. Now sleep," he said seriously. His tone suggested he was not in the mood for arguing, so I sank down into the mattress as he released his hand.

He stared at me approvingly while I remained quiet and still, waiting for sleep. The fact that he was staying until I fell asleep was enough for me to ignore his arrogant method of silencing me, so I was not going to argue. I honestly didn't want to be alone right now, and I was frighteningly becoming attached to Ronan. It sucked to admit, but it was true. Apparently Ronan felt it too because as I drifted off to sleep, I could feel his fingers caressing my neck.

Small actions such as these made it clear to me that Ronan had feelings for me.

For the first time ever, I fell asleep with a smile on my face.

Uh-oh...things are getting a little steamy.

Reviews are always welcome and helpful! ;)