WARNING: The next 2 chapters are going to be really mushy(emotional, not very sexual). These two chapters deal with some tough subjects.

This is some serious mushy stuff but I like it. please, let me know what you think.

10 pm Christine's apartment

Mac is sitting on the couch. He is leaning against the corner and is reading a book. Christine is sitting on the other end of the couch and is zapping through tv-channels. There are 2 empty coffee cups on the table. Christine starts to yawn. Mac look over at her and smiles.

"we should go to bed." He says.

"no no. I'm not tired."

"you sound like Lucy now. She is never tired either."

Christine is sitting on her legs. She stretches out her leg en gives Mac's leg a small kick. Mac looks over at her and pretends to be shocked at her behavior, but he can't keep his shocked expression for long. Christine turns off the tv and places the remote on the table and sees the cups is empty.

"there is more coffee. You want some more?" she asks.

"no thanks." Mac says. Christine takes the two empty cups and walks to the kitchen.

"I'm going to bed." She says once she is back in the living room. She leans down over him and gives him a kiss.

"I'll be right there." He says and goes back to finish the chapter in his book.

Christine is already laying in bed when Mac comes into the bedroom. He places his book on the nightstand on his side of the bed and walks to the bathroom and gets ready for bed.

Mac lays down on the bed and Christine immediately moves closer to him. He is laying on his back and she moves closer so she is almost laying on him and she starts kisses his chest and up his neck to his lips.

"Christine…" Mac says to stop her when he feels her hand moving under his t-shirt. She looks surprised at him.

"what?"

"I sorry. I'm really tired."

She looks surprised at him. He has never rejected her before.

""you are too tired?" Christine asks in disbelieve of his excuse.

"yes I'm too tired."
"Mac Taylor. You have gotten more sleep over the past few days than you usually get in a week and you are too tired. You function at work with 3 hours of sleep."

"I… I just don't feel like it tonight." He explains. He immediately sees the disappointment in her eyes.

She moves over to her own side of the bed and lays on her side with her back to him. He moves over and lays behind her with his arms around her. Usually when he does that she held his hands. Mac knows he has disappointed her, which he never intended to.

"I'm sorry sweetie." He says and kisses her on her cheep. He turns her head to look at him. His face I directly above hers.

"It is alright, Mac." She says but she can see Mac doesn't really believe her so she kisses him to try and convince him but that doesn't really work. They lay down together where Mac is laying behind Christine with his arms around here, but there is an awkward mood in the room until they fall asleep.

3 am Christine's apartment

Mac wakes up and realizes Christine is not in bed. He sits up and turns on his nightstand. He hears crying coming from the living room. He gets up and walks into the Livingroom. Christine is sitting at the dining table with her laptop in front of her. She is resting her head on her hands. She doesn't hear him come. He walks over and stands behind her. He places his hands on her upper arms. She looks at his hands and then looks to down to the side and wipe away the tears that were falling down her face.

"why are you up this early?" Christine asks. She is trying to make her voice sound normal like he didn't notice that she was crying.

"don't do that." He says and takes a seat next to her. She looks away from him. "Christine." He says and places his hands on hers to make her look at him. Tears have started to fall down her face again.

"Mac. Just go back to bed. I'll be there soon." She says. She never makes eye contact with him. Christine notices Mac looks at her computer and she closes the screen down but not before Mac get to see that she has been searching on kidnap victim statistics.

"what is that?" Mac asks when she closes her computer.

"nothing. Go back to bed." Christine says still without making eye contact.

"Christine… what happened today? You have distanced yourself from me since you came home from trauma therapy. Talk to me."

Tears start falling down her face again.

"do you still find me attractive?" she asks and makes eye contact with him for the first time.

"yes of cause I do. Why would you ask me that?" he asks. He is not sure where the conversation is going.

"my psychologist told me today that it is normal that relationships fall apart after a traumatic event where a person is physically harmed. Especially when it is the woman who is harmed."

"Christine hey. I still find you very attractive." That creates a little smile in Christine's face but it doesn't last long.
"Mac. We haven't been together since I came home." Christine says and wipes away a tear falling down her face.

"we've been together non stop." Mac says trying to lighten the mood.

"Mac… you know what I mean. We haven't been together." Christine says. Mac realizes that his little joke didn't lighten the mood as he intended.

"okay. I know we haven't been together, but believe me it is not because I don't want to." That makes Christine smile.

"Mac…" Christine says but stops herself. Mac removes a tear falling down her face. "Mac, my psychologist asked me today if you had changed behavior towards me since I came home. If you have been treating me differently. He also asked me if you have been more distant towards me since I came home."
"do you think I have?" Mac asks concerned about her answer.

"no. no. not at first." "at first?" mac asks confused. "when he asked me at the session I was 100% sure that nothing had changed about the 2 of us, but then when we went to bed I started thinking about the things he said and…" "you were not so sure anymore?" mac finishes her sentence. Christine shakes her head. She feels bad when she sees how it affects Mac. "I'm sorry Mac. I didn't mean for this to affect you." She says.

"you have nothing to apologize for. Everything about our relationship involves both of us. You told me that 6 months ago." Christine finds it a bit amusing that he is using her words from when he was struggling with his memory lost against her now.
"listen, Christine. I know that it might have seemed like I was distance myself from you since you came home from the hospital, but… I have seen too many relationships falling apart after a violent crime. I don't that to happen to ours." Mac explains.

"what usually happens?" she asks. Not sure if she even wants to know the answer or not.

"often after a violent crime a couple they go back to exactly the way things where like nothing ever happened. The problem about that is… things are not the same. Violent crimes often leave both mental and physical scars on the victim. It can change the way a person sees himself. Going right back to the way things where before can make a relationship fall apart because the victim of violent crime has changed. It can be something that the offender did, like touching a person's face and after the crime the victim always relates that with something bad."

"even if it was something that the person used to like?" she asks. Mac nods. She gets his point. "so you are afraid that if we move forward with our relationship too soon it can ruin our relationship?" she asks.

Mac nods. "I don't know what you went through. You might not even know yourself if they did something to you that has changed something that you used to like and now find very uncomfortable."
Christine looks away from him a wipes a tear away from her faces. She looks back at him with a little smile. "I feel so stupid right now."

"don't…" Mac says. "this is very important to talk about. " it is a concern that you had and we need to discuss that, but…" he says and takes her hands in his. "I can assure you I still find you very attractive. Over the past few days I felt like a teenage boy with a forbidden crush on the prettiest girl at the school." That makes Christine laugh.

"Mac." She says and blushes. "you are so silly and sweet."

"I would be lying if I said I haven't thought about us being together over the past few days, but I know that you need time to deal with what happened to you and the rest will come at some point. When you are ready." Christine looks into his eyes while he speaks. It makes her fall in love with him all over again when he speaks with some much sincerity, love, passion and vulnerability in his voice and every emotion is reflected in his dark eyes. She leans in and kisses him with all the love she feels for him and he reciprocates with just as much love and passion.

"you know I really want to be with you right now." She says and in an almost whispering voice.

"I know. But we need to wait until you are ready… mentally."

"I feel like being in high school again."
that makes them both love. "I know. Me too. But it is for the best." Christine looks a little disappointed at him but she knows he is right.

"let's go back to bed…" he says and stands up and reaches his hand out to her. He helps her to her feet. She has a smile on her face. "and get some sleep." Heads with a smile.

"you are no fun." She says and follows him to the bedroom.