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One thing you learn being a former super soldier to a corrupt space army is how to sleep with one eye open. Not literally of course- because that's just not humanly possible. What I mean to say is that training for the Kree Starforce has taught me to always be fully aware of my surroundings, even while I'm asleep.
I'm jolted awake by the faint sound of my hardwood floor creaking. Someone is in my apartment. My curtains are drawn and very little light could seep through the heavy drapes, making it difficult to figure out what time it was. But a glance at my alarm clock quickly tells me that it's barely 7am. I leap off my bed, feet landing on the floor without so much as making a squeak. I move to position myself beside my bedroom door, my back against the wall. Whoever this intruder was, they chose the wrong apartment to mess with.
I see the doorknob turn and before the assailant could make it through, I yank the door wide open and tackle them to the ground.
"Carol! What the hell?"
The voice sounds familiar, but I am distracted by the sound of ceramic and glass breaking as it hits the floor. It takes a moment for things to make sense, but I finally look down at the person beneath me, struggling against my grip.
"Nat!" I exclaim. I let go of her wrists, which I had pinned to the floor just seconds ago.
"Yeah, good morning to you too Danvers".
"I'm sorry, but-", I pause to survey the room. All kinds of food were scattered on the floor, amongst the broken glass shards and shattered plates. There were pancakes, remnants of an omelette, and various fruit cut into cubes. A small puddle had formed as well, the citrusy smell telling me it's orange juice. "-why were you trying to break into my house? And what's with all the food?"
"Okay, first of all, I wasn't trying to break in. You gave me a key in case of emergencies, remember? And second, all this food on the floor is for breakfast. Well, supposedly for breakfast. It's not like we can eat this now" She sighs deeply.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-".
"Hey Carol?" She cuts me off before I can explain myself.
"Yeah?" I reply cautiously.
"Not that I'm not enjoying having you on top of me, but maybe you'd like to get up now?"
My eyes grow wide, realizing we were still on the floor. I quickly pull myself up and help her get on her feet as well. I stare numbly at the mess around us, unsure of what to say.
"Not exactly how I thought this morning would pan out," Nat says, a slight grin tugging at her lips.
I smile back sheepishly, embarrassed by my actions. I'd been on earth for a while now, but life here was still taking a lot of getting used to. After the war with Thanos, I decided to stick around and help the Avengers deal with the aftermath of the Snap. Or the blip, dumb as it sounds. But that's what all the news channels are calling it.
"What's going on in that mind of yours, Carol?" Nat's voice cuts through my thoughts and I shift my attention back to her. "Nothing, I just feel foolish for how I acted, pouncing on you and all that," I say, trying to look as apologetic as possible.
"It's fine, I should have known better than to try and surprise you."
"What was the surprise for anyway?"
Nat looks at me pointedly. "You're joking, right? It's your birthday!"
My birthday? I think to myself. I pause, feeling lightheaded for a second. I can't even remember the last time I celebrated my birthday. Probably while I was living with Maria and Monica, but that seems like another lifetime ago. I look at Nat, her piercing green eyes staring right back at me, expecting some sort of reaction. But my face stays blank.
"I haven't thought about my human birthday in a long while", I reply quietly. "When I was in Hala, we would celebrate the anniversary of Yon-Rogg finding me and turning me into one of them. But I try to not think of those years anymore".
"I'm sorry, Carol. We don't ha-, I wasn't think-", Nat trips over her words. I've made her uncomfortable and for a second, I almost want to smile because it takes a lot to unsettle Natasha Romanoff. I turn to her and gently caress the side of her face with my hand. I can feel her respond to my touch, leaning closer into me.
"It's fine", I reassure her. She looks at me, her eyes soft and beautiful. I lean in to gently kiss her forehead. I still don't know what's going on between us. Nat isn't a fan of labels, and I don't know the first thing about being in a relationship. I was her support system for the last five years, and I found myself relying on her more and more as well. Those were difficult times, and it didn't seem smart to enter into a relationship. But with things back to normal, or as normal as they'll ever be at this point, maybe this is our chance to figure things out?
"Nat," I say softly. "Why don't I start cleaning up here, while you take a shower? You can borrow and change into my clothes since yours is soaked in orange juice".
"Yeah, that sounds like a plan." She moves away from me, but not before briefly holding my hand in hers and smiling the smile that I know she has reserved especially for me.
I'm almost done throwing all the wasted food away when I hear her step out of the bathroom and open my closet. I don't want to intrude, so I give her five more minutes before knocking on my door.
"I don't know why you're knocking Carol, this is your house," Nat calls out from the other side.
"I just didn't want to come in and find you in an, umm," I pause for a second, choosing my words. "In a compromising situation."
I hear her laugh before she says "I'm not in a compromising situation, Carol. You can come in."
I'm not sure why, but seeing Nat in front of my mirror, drying her hair with a towel puts a smile on my face. She looks so at home even though she's only been in my apartment a handful of times since I moved in. I take a seat on the edge of my bed, not even caring that I'm openly gawking at her.
"Let me take you out for breakfast instead", I say, breaking the silence.
"What's that?" Nat turns to look at me.
"I said, let me take you out for breakfast. It is my birthday after all, right? And doesn't the birthday girl usually get her way?"
Nat grins. "See, it's when you say things like that that make me suspicious of how much of your human life you actually remember."
"I guess we'll never know," I answer back, trying to look innocent. "So that's a yes?"
"Yeah, I'll let you take me out, Danvers. You should know though, I'm a really fancy gal. I only dine in the finest establishments".
"I wouldn't expect anything less," I banter. I push myself off the bed, and head towards the bathroom. "I'll take a shower and then we can leave."
"Need any help in there?" I had my back turned, but I could hear the mischief in her voice. Luckily, she couldn't see my cheeks burning up at the thought of us confined in my tiny bathroom.
"Nah, I'm good," I say, keeping my voice steady. I quickly close the door and undress. I turn the shower head on, thinking of how unequipped I am in dealing with all the feelings I have for the stunning woman on the other side of my bathroom door.
Nat isn't in the room when I step out. Not wanting to keep her waiting, I make my way to my closet and quickly figure out what I'd wear. I don't usually care too much about how I look, but today was special. I pause for a moment and survey my options. Fashion changes too quickly on earth, so I try to stick to very basic clothes like jeans and dark-colored tops. As I sort through my collection of almost identical navy and black sweaters, I remember that Pepper has bought a bunch of clothes for me when I first moved in. A lot of them were a bit too colorful for my taste, but there was this delicate white top that I remember catching my attention. I rummage at the back and successfully pull it out, excited to be wearing something different for once. The material is soft and sheer. The front opens in a v, and the slightly puffed out sleeves reach down to my wrists. I pull out a pair of faded jeans and tuck the shirt in at the front, which I see a lot of women do these days. Finally, I pull out a pair of light suede ankle boots. I survey my reflection on my full-length mirror and decide that I look pretty damn good. I'm almost tempted to put a little make up on aside from my usual sunscreen and lip balm, but that just feels excessive at this point.
I place my phone and wallet inside a small black body bag and head out to the living room. I see Nat right away, comfortably perched on my couch. She's wearing an olive-green sweater with a low neckline, and dark jeans that fit her curves perfectly. I've never seen those clothes before, but realize they're most likely from Pepper's haul as well. I make a mental note to let Nat keep those jeans. No way in hell are they going to look as good on me. She also has her signature black boots on- the perfect footwear to her already very stunning outfit. I'm gawking again, but I don't care. She looks elegant and so put together. Fact of the matter is, she could wear a ratty shirt and baggy jeans and still be the most gorgeous woman in any room.
"You ready to go?" I ask. She looks up from her phone, and I see a look of surprise in her eyes.
"This is a new look for you, Carol. I really like it," she nods approvingly. She gets up and heads towards the front door, while I follow suit. We're out of my stuffy building in minutes, and on the streets of New York. There aren't too many people out yet, probably still sleeping in and making the most of their lazy Sunday morning. But not us. Here and now, beside Nat, is right where I want to be.
I don't know where we're going, but she's decided to take the lead and I let her. It's easier that way. Twenty minutes later, we've stopped at an unfamiliar restaurant. It looks dark inside and I wonder if it's even open.
"Nat, I don't think they're serving people yet."
"Don't worry about it, I know the owner. Trust me, they'll serve us." She opens the door, and just as I expected, it was dark and empty. Wait if it's empty, why was the door op-
"SURPRISE!" I scream and jump back. All of a sudden, the lights are turned on, and the restaurant is filled with familiar and excited looking faces.
"Nat, what's going on?" I say, my heart racing like crazy.
"This is what you call a surprise party, Carol." She has this look of accomplishment on her face, and that's when I realize that this whole thing had been planned from the start.
"Auntie Carol!" I hear a high-pitched voice and soon enough, feel two small arms wrap around my waist.
"Hi Morgan!" I pick her up carry her against my chest. "I'm so glad you're here. You really surprised me."
"Daddy said I had to be really quiet so you didn't catch on."
"You did a good job kiddo." I smile at her brightly.
"So that's where you've run off to," says a familiar voice.
"Hey Tony, I believe this little girl is yours." Morgan laughs at my comment before reaching out for her father.
"Happy birthday, Carol." He says as he leans in for a quick hug. I don't see Tony a lot since he lives outside of the city now, but Nat and I visit as much as we can. Morgan goes back and forth deciding who her favorite "aunt" is, but it mostly depends on who brings the best presents, and Nat has been winning by a long shot.
Pepper approaches our small circle, looking like a goddess in a beautiful navy blue wrap dress. "Are you finally wearing one of the blouses I got you, Carol?" She looks so pleased, and I almost feel bad for ignoring the clothes. I tell myself to wear them more often, or at least when I visit them.
"Yeah, I am. I don't know how you do it, Pepper. These clothes fit me perfectly."
"Well I'm glad you've finally decided to wear something besides those black sweaters. Oh, and happy birthday! I was going to start with that, but I got distracted by the shirt," she laughs. She comes in for a hug and I let her. I'm not much of a hugger, but I have a soft spot for all the Starks.
"Hey baby," Pepper says to Morgan. "Did you give Aunt Carol your present?"
"I get a party and presents?" I react, feigning surprise for Morgan. She giggles in her father's arms and proceeds to pull a small package from her dress pocket.
"I made it all on my own, Auntie Carol," she announces with pride as my heart melts a little more for this little girl. I smile and think that there's absolutely nothing I wouldn't do for her. I clumsily open the small package and out falls a handmade bracelet. There are three small, differently shaped beads and I realize that they're homemade as well. Etched in her small handwriting are our initials and a heart sign.
"Oh Morgan, this is beautiful," I say with sincerity. I turn to Nat who had been standing quietly by my side. "Can you help me put it on?"
"Of course," she says as she fiddles with the clasp. I don't think I'll ever take it off.
"Don't let us keep you," Pepper says as she leads her husband and daughter away. "I know a lot more people want to wish you a happy birthday." I nod, and wave back at Morgan saying goodbye.
Still feeling overwhelmed, I take Nat's hand in mine, and she surprisingly lets me without protest. "Hey Nat?" I whisper.
"Yeah?" she says back just as quietly.
"Don't take this the wrong way, but I have a hard time believing you put all this together".
"What's that supposed to mean?" She says indignantly. "I am a highly-skilled secret agent, with a wide range of skills, many of which you don't even know about. How sure are you that I wasn't the mastermind behind all this?"
"Because she wasn't, I was. Happy Birthday Carol!" I turn and find Wanda standing there, her arms linked with Hope. They surprise me with a hug, which I return with as much enthusiasm as is humanly possible. Living the life I've led for the past few years didn't allow a lot of time for friendships. I decide then and there that this surprise party was a nice gesture and that I was blessed to be surrounded by… My family? I can feel my eyes getting watery, but I quickly blink back the tears. Today would be a happy day.
The pair finally release me from their tight hug, and I let Wanda go on and on about how much work it took to put everything together. I nodded every few seconds or so to show her that I was listening, but the truth was, my mind was wandering. I took a quick survey of the room and was happy to see familiar faces. Peter was chasing after Morgan as Pepper and Tony looked on fondly. In one corner, Quill and Thor were having some sort of arm-wrestling match while Groot, Rocket, and Banner cheered them on. T'Challa was in a heated discussion with Rhodey and Steve, with Bucky and Sam sitting nearby, enjoying cold glasses of beer and chicken wings.
I re-focus on Wanda as she finishes a story on how Happy was in charge of the balloons, but there was a mix-up at the store and all the balloons had "It's a Boy" on them instead of "Happy Birthday!"
"So I said to Hope"- Wanda stops midstory and looks to Hope for support, who nods back eagerly, "-we're the Avengers. If we can save this planet from war-crazy creatures from outer space, I'm sure we can get the right balloons to Carol's party", she finishes with an accomplished grin.
"I'm sure Carol thoroughly enjoyed that story Wanda, but she looks rather hungry. Maybe she needs refreshments?" Vision approaches and wraps his arm around Wanda's waist. She smiles and leans in. "There you are, Vis. Have you wished Carol a happy birthday?"
"I haven't yet, but happy birthday Carol!"
"Thank you, Vision". I reply with a smile.
"Sorry for not showing up sooner. Scott and I were working on the buffet table." He explains.
"If I know Scott, he was probably sampling everything on the menu instead of helping you out," Hope says knowingly.
"Yes, I still find his humor difficult to comprehend. But he is very nice to me, and I-."
Before Vision can finish his sentence, microphone static fills the room. I grimace from the sound, and turn to see Tony adjusting the volume on his mic.
"Hey everyone," he calls out. "I think it's time we sing Carol a happy birthday!" The crowd cheers in response and starts singing along in unison. I see Fury and Agent Hill wheel in the craziest looking cake, with all the colors of the rainbow splattered all over it. I am comforted to know Nat has never left my side, and I reach for her hand again, almost instinctively. As the song comes to an end, everyone I know has formed a circle around me.
"Make a Wish, Carol," Scott yells from the group. I look at Nat, and she smiles at me, nudging me to move closer to the giant cake.
"Okay, here goes nothing," I say with a smile. Wishing for things has always seemed pointless to me. You don't wish and hope for things to happen, you make things happen. Not to say that there haven't been some wishful thoughts in the past. But for the first time in a long time, things have been good, and there's honestly nothing else I could ask for. With Nat by my side, and this newfound family, I had all I needed out of life.
"Thank you" I whisper into the Universe, quiet enough for only me to hear. I take a deep breath, and blow all the candles out.
Hours later, Nat and I are resting on my couch, a random movie playing in the background. The party was a big hit and had lasted until evening, with everyone reluctant to leave when the time came to part ways. We had been doing a play by play of our favorite parts of the day, but the conversation eventually died down and we were both lost in thought. She was sitting on one side of the couch, while I was lying down, my head resting on her lap. Her delicate hands were running through my hair when I thought of something I'd been meaning to ask her.
"Nat?"
"Hmmm?"
"What if I didn't tackle you and ruin all the food you had brought?"
"What do you mean, Carol?"
"That was the premise of the surprise, right? I had ruined breakfast so you convinced me to take you out and that's how we ended up at the restaurant."
Nat looks at me quizzically. "You fixate on the weirdest things, you know that right? But fine, if you have to know, breakfast in bed was never part of the plan". She pauses, and I can see her debating with herself as to whether or not I get to hear the whole story. After a minute of silence, she looks at me with a resigned smile. I smile back, encouraging her to continue.
"Do you remember the last time we stayed over at Tony's place and we helped Morgan prepare breakfast for him and Pepper?" I nod, remembering how blissful that weekend had been. "While we were there, you told me no one had ever surprised you with breakfast in bed."
I remember that memory very clearly all of a sudden. We were huddled outside Tony and Pepper's bedroom door, waiting for the right time to wake them up when I casually whispered to Nat that no one had ever done that for me. I feel my heart swell up knowing that she committed that to memory.
Before I can say anything, she continues. "I can sense when something matters to someone, Carol. And the wistful, dejected puppy-dog look that you had in your eyes at the time told me it was important to you, even though you tried to make it seem like it was just a casual comment. I know you've missed out on a lot of human experiences, but I'm here now. We'll make all those experiences happen for you, okay? And as for getting you to the restaurant, I'm pretty sure batting my eyelashes and some sexy pouting would have been enough to get you to do whatever you want," she says with a laugh.
"You think so, huh?" I say, getting up from her lap.
"Oh, I know so, Danvers." We're sitting cross-legged on the couch, locked in a staring competition, but I breakaway first and tackle her with a hug. We fall to the floor, a mess of legs and arms, as I try to tickle her.
"Stop that!" She says, between giggled breaths.
"Make me," I retort. We continue wrestling and tickling each other, our martial arts skills making it a little more harmful than intended. We eventually collapse on the floor as I wipe tears from my eyes from laughing too hard. I lean on my side and look at Natasha, gesturing for her to come closer. She obliges, and makes herself comfortable on my chest.
"You make me so happy, Natasha Romanoff", I whisper into her hair. "You do a good job of making me smile too, Danvers", she whispers back, sounding very sleepy. I close my eyes, focused on how beautiful every breath she takes is, until the sound of light snoring takes over. I think about carrying her into my bedroom, but this moment that we're suspended in right now is too perfect. I decide it's fine to stay where we are. I hear the light chime of my wristwatch, telling me it's midnight. And just like that, my birthday, the first real one I've had in years, is over.