Explosions.
The ground shook, fires started filling the air with smoke, screams were heard through the night, buildings were cracked, and alarms were sounding.
Onlookers watched their Kage rise to protect them in the air attempting to pull the attention away from the village, though it was clear by the red clouds on the terrorist robes what he was there for.
Temari rushed through the village, pushing people that were standing and watching out of her way, ordering them to get out of range. Damage control and safety was all the village nin's current objective, but she couldn't help but stare up at her brother as he fought as well.
What if this was the time he wasn't strong enough?
What if this was the time that his beast failed him?
What if?
Screams were heard again, this time in alarm as a flash of dark hair started across rooftops. Heading directly for the fight. It leaped for a stray bomb heading for the ground, swiping at it. The bomb exploded harmlessly in the air.
The streak landed but was knocked back on a rooftop by a ball of sand all before Temari could tell what it was.
Hinata.
She stood up to argue with the patch of sand. Thrusting her finger at it, making her point. When it didn't move out of her way, her hands started their blue glow and swiped at the sand. It snatched away from her, pausing as she scowled at it but then made her a platform.
She rode it up to the fight.
Temari now feared for them both.
Gaara flinched as he felt Hinata hopped on the platform.
'What are you doing!' He barked at his beast. 'This is not protecting her!'
'She wants to protect you.' The beast growled back, but he didn't seem sure himself.
'You will protect her.' Gaara snapped. He didn't care if he came out unscathed. She needed to live. He could not watch her die.
She was lifted next to him, and he pulled her in, and the sand encased them both, shielding from another explosion.
"I don't want you here." He growled at her.
"I didn't ask." She snapped back.
"You are short-range. You are no help to me."
"I can see." She demanded.
He considered it with a huff. Shukaku could protect her. He would protect her over himself, he was sure.
"Alright." He agreed.
"This man's name is Deidara. He's a missing-nin from Iwagakure." Hinata flinched and told him they were about to be hit. Gaara felt the explosion fall over the ball, but it wasn't affected. It was warning him to come back out. His face scrunched. She was unsafe here. "He makes the explosives with his hands. He's got something there that makes them quickly. I can see a concentration of chakra, though I don't know how it works. That's his weak…" She jerked her head to the sand wall around them. "He is going to drop one on the city."
Gaara opened the ball to stop it where she indicated, and the Akatsuki robed man grinned at him.
"The bombs are filled with chakra. I can tell exactly where they're going." She explained as he grabbed her waist. She would fall if he started jerking the ball.
"Then this should be easier." He mumbled.
"Don't be so sure, yeah." The blonde opened his hand, revealing another bird.
Hinata squinted, trying to understand what she was seeing. Gaara closed the shield around them as the wounded bomber set to work again. The things in Deidara's hands added to the sand. It was no longer just Gaara and Shukaku's chakra she was seeing.
And it was spreading!
"No! Open it! He has his chakra in the sand!" Gaara didn't seem to have time to react. She was jerked out of the ball and tossed. A scream escaped her as the ball of sand imploded. She fell hard, slamming through two floors. She got up, forcing herself to jump through the hole she had created only to watch him as he fell into the bird's tail. She could only watch as the one-armed bomber waved at her as he flew away.
"Hinata!" She stumbled to her knees to hold the back of her head as she realized how much it hurt. She felt arms come around her as her 360 vision tunneled in around the last of what she could see of the bird.
She quickly mumbled the direction and speed he was going as her Byakugan deactivated and her vision fully closed in.
She sat up, staring at the blankets of her hospital bed as she was reported to. She had no concussion, so she decided she could take duties as soon as she woke up.
This was what he had wanted after all, right? This is why they had talked about it. She was to take his place if he couldn't, but it hadn't occurred to him, she would be emotionally unable. She pushed through it. She hadn't even cried yet. Her husband could be dead, and she hadn't even cried.
She hadn't felt anything yet. She just felt sick.
She realized why he did it, why he kept so much work. It kept your mind off what was happening. She could hear about the team that was trying to track him, and somehow that distracted her from the fact he was the one missing.
She heard several reports and made several orders before Kankuro and Temari were able to see her. They looked exhausted and ruined.
Temari took one look at her surrounded by paper, and her face scrunched in anger. "How can you do it?" Temari growled. "How can you sit there and not bat an eyelash."
Hinata stared at her blankly. She didn't have an answer. Had it just not hit her yet? Was it because she wasn't sure he was dead? Temari crossed the room quickly, only to be stopped short by Kankuro snagging her wrist. Hinata frowned and looked down.
Temari faltered and squeaked as she broke. "He loved you! He doesn't love anything, but he loved you! And you're working!"
"Temari." Kankuro struggled with her. "She's coping. You've had to work too. We do not have the luxury to stop when we lose a nin."
"You were everything to him!" She barked, not listening to her brother.
Hinata closed her eyes for a moment. "Isn't this what he would do?" Hinata asked, looking up, feeling broken, she still couldn't muster a tear. Why couldn't she cry? It was like being so sick but not being able to throw up.
Temari stared at her as her lip trembled. She stopped fighting and went limp. Her face scrunched as she dissolved into tears Kankuro let her go, and she fell forward onto the bed to cry. Hinata laid her hand on her head and pet her hair down. Her hands shook with the stress.
Kankuro shrank as well to sit by his sister, looking miserably down at her as he laid a hand on her back. Both strong, focused nin, reduced to miserable shards in a way Hinata had never seen. They mourned their brother, though they didn't know if he was dead, yet she still couldn't even cry.
"The team looking for him from Konoha, is Naruto on it?" Kankuro asked, looking up at her.
She nodded.
"They will find him even if they have to rip the countryside apart then, you Leaf, if anything at all, you are loyal." He mumbled.
"What happens if we can't get him back." She whispered, not wanting to think about that possibility as real as it might be.
"Then you are Kazekage until Matsuri is ready. That was the agreement. The council doesn't have a choice. That paper is the only word they have to go by, signed, and sealed." Kankuro explained.
She wished that horrible paperwork had never found its use.
Temari resolved to sniffle and wipe her face. Hinata couldn't smile at her to make her feel better, but she could give her a look of sympathy.
She felt rotten.
Hinata still hadn't cried.
The moment she was allowed out of the hospital, she was in his office. Her work was given to Matsuri and Temari. Kankuro got her up to date with everything her husband had been working on that she hadn't already been a part of, then went to run the clean up. She buried herself in her work. She finally understood Gaara's obsession. She could duck her head into papers for hours, forget what time it was, and miss dinner.
Matsuri checked in on her after the first missed meal. She took her next meal in her office. She didn't want to be around others right now. As much as she would like to be supportive of her small family. How could she when she was yet to even shed a tear over her husband? Why couldn't she cry?
She rubbed her eyes and looked at the clock. It was late. There was still no word on Gaara's location or his status. She yawned. She was healing, she was tired, but the last place she wanted to go to was an empty bed. She glanced over to the small couch. She didn't want to sleep there either, but she would be in the office if there was change.
It would have to do.
Temari knocked on Hinata and Gaara's room. Hinata hadn't done her usual training and breakfast routine, which was fine, but knowing her, she would be sure to make sure Temari knew that she was going to miss. When she got no answer, she unlocked it and found it empty. She felt uncomfortable looking into the room, completely untouched. It was like they were both gone. Bed made, Hinata's small amount of decorations, Gaara's books, they laid untouched and cold.
She closed the door with a click and rested against it, forcing herself not to tear up as she frowned at the floor. She had never really thought that losing her little brother was a possibility. He was always too strong, too dangerous. She had grown close to him since he had started opening up. Hinata had been so good for him. It finally felt like they were a normal family. She could trust him. She didn't feel like he might turn on her when she became inconvenient. She had never once thought about how she would feel losing him. A few years ago, it would have been a relief, but now? It was heartbreaking in a stomach-wrenching way. She had never felt so violently before.
She closed her eyes and took a breath, but heavy nausea didn't leave her. Gaara had to be alive for now. They wanted the beast, so they needed him alive, but the question was, would he survive, or would they kill him after? This is not helping.
She pushed off the door to head up to Kazekage's office. That would be the only other place she could think of for her to be.
Hinata was curled up on the couch with a single throw blanket when Temari found her. Papers neatly lining the floor where she had been working. She still had her clothes from the day before. Her hair was pulled up messily, and despite the fact she was sleeping, she still looked tired.
Temari bent over her and touched her shoulder. Hinata bolted upright and blinked at her before calming.
"Why didn't you go to bed?" Temari asked, picking up the papers she had left on the floor.
"The bed is made for two people," Hinata mumbled. She looked up at the time. She was up late, but Gaara was what woke her up usually. "I'll go clean up." She wouldn't have wanted to train today with the shape she was in.
Temari looked horrible. She looked tired and upset. It was weakening to see such a strong spirit, so beaten emotionally. Suna mourned their leader. You could feel it without going outside. She wanted to ask how Suna handled deaths or funerals, but she didn't want to discuss it right now. They weren't even sure if he was dead.
"I'll get breakfast for you." Temari sighed, rubbing her face opening the door for her.
Her second day went much like the one before. If she hadn't changed clothes, she might have run them together in her head. With little word on the search for her husband, she forced herself to work on anything she laid her hands on. She wanted to be alone to forget that this shouldn't be her job, but the council felt the need to remind her that she was, in fact, Kazekage.
"You should have robes made." She was told, she gave the old man in his official robes a cold frown.
"We have no word on the status of the Kazekage. I am only temporary. There is no need. It has only been 80 hours." She was greatly annoyed with any amount of pushing right now.
Baki had stepped in with the man. He was frowning rather deeply. "As much as I agree with you, Hinata, it is custom. Temari and Kankuro have never been officially made Kage, which is why they have never had their own. This is different. We are without our Kage. You have stepped into that place, and when and if he returns, he may reclaim his place, but until then, we need to follow custom thoroughly. Suna is scared and cracked. We need to assure the people we will not fall."
Hinata looked down, not wanting to glare at the kind old man. He was right. They were attacked, and something was taken from them. Their walls had been breached, and their homes were destroyed.
She sighed. "Fine, have one made. I will do the proper ceremonies but understand that we should not be planning for this to be long term. I have no desire to be Kage. I simply am convenient." She expressed. The old councilman smiled like he had done something and left.
Baki closed the door behind him. "I understand, I would like nothing more than to hide you away and allow you to mourn, but we must think of the people. Despite your short time here and home lineage, you have made an extremely positive image to the people. You've brought in knowledge from your homeland, but you have welcomed our culture. The people have seen that, and they will be proud to have you lead them."
"I am sure not all." She added.
"No, there will always be those who will think that you should have no place in our government, but we learn nothing by isolating ourselves." He countered."
She looked down. Staying silent. There was no sense arguing their options were low. Matsuri wasn't ready, and she was having a hard time as it was with Gaara's kidnapping, as was Temari. Kankuro was quiet and hadn't made a joke since. It was surreal and uncomfortable being in a room with him being so quiet.
"Why are you not an option?" She wondered.
"If he had simply fallen ill, I believe I would be an option, but falling back on old face during times of crisis causes cowering." She didn't quite understand what he meant. "You will ensure hope. I will show that we have had to take a step back."
She nodded, not agreeing.
"Would you like me to take the responsibility from you?" He asked seriously.
She looked down. She was not meant to be in this chair. It was wrong to her in a way, but this was what she had agreed to. Gaara had prepared for her to take his place in case he fell. This was where he wanted her until Matsuri could. "No, I will serve Suna with all that I can. This is what he wanted."
"We can only hope that there will be little need for your services." He added, giving her a sympathetic tired look, showing age and pain in his eyes.
"How are you." She wondered, tilting her head.
He smiled faintly. "I should be asking you that." He sighed, thinking over his answer. "I have much pride in having such a loyal man being my student. He protected his village. He protected you." She looked down. "Despite how he grew up and what weights were put on him, he managed to become a good man that I am proud of."
She frowned. "You didn't answer the question."
"Neither would you if I asked." He countered.
She closed her eyes, feeling her pain bubble up. Still, no tears came.
"You remind me of him. You are so used to internalizing your pains that it has become a defense. The difference is his internalization overflowed, and it makes him lash out. You just let it eat you." He observed.
She didn't look up. He was right.
"Don't let it eat you till nothing is left. Maybe it's best to lash out sometimes." He bowed his head and left her be.
She looked at the closed door and frowned. She would rather let it eat her away. Maybe then the pain would stop.