Jack's POV
The other Guardians didn't pay Elsa a visit until Christmas, which was four days after her birth, and during those first four days of her life I remained at her and her parents' sides. Well, that's a lie. I actually left a few times to scope the area, looking for anything that would lead me to Pitch. Unfortunately, there was no sign of him. There was, however, a whole lot of snow in the King and Queen's room when I came back, a sign of the gift I had unintentionally given the princess.
Iduna and Agnarr were shocked beyond belief, as expected, when they discovered Elsa's powers. It happened an hour or so after Tara and I had discovered it ourselves. I was going through some of the King's things, looking for a writing utensil and some paper to doodle with so I could survive boredom, when Elsa suddenly started to cry.
That's not all she did though. Yeah, she actually froze her entire cradle, and before I could come to her aide, her parents are already wide awake and at her side, shocked at the sight. It didn't take them long to come up with the conclusion that their daughter had been gifted, and while I knew Iduna would be ecstatic about her daughter being magical, since she grew up with magic, it was Agnarr's reaction that I was concerned with.
Magic is what his father feared. It's what killed him.
To my surprise though, he's just as thrilled as his wife is.
Thank God!
Unless he's pretending.
Anyway, when Tara returned, I told her what she missed, and she told me that the others plan on visiting with North on Christmas. Christmas rolls around and the others are completely smitten with Elsa, just as Tara and I are. North, being the jolly Mr. Santa Clause that he is, gifts her with a silver snowflake patterned rattle, which excites the princess, who was awake when the others had visited. And upon her excitement, frost emits from her fingers and covers the rattle that she held, shocking the others though they already knew of her powers.
And their faces absolutely killed me! Bunny's most of all.
Time goes on and there's still no sign of Pitch. Whenever a different Guardian would take over my babysitting shift, I would leave to bring Winter to whatever location Queen Tara needed, searching for any signs of him too and finding nothing. Sometimes it wouldn't be a Guardian at all that would take over the babysitting. Sometimes it would be a human sized Leafmen that Tara would glamour to be unseen by the humans. She usually sends out her most trusted soldier, General Ronin, who I swear she's in love with. I think he loves her too to be honest.
Anyway, time passes and Elsa's powers grow stronger. And while neither Agnarr or Iduna has ever handled a child before, let alone one who possess magic, I must say that they were doing a fantastic job at raising her and handling her powers.
In February, another heir is born to the Viking village of Berk, premature as well, which is uncommon for Vikings. I wasn't there for his birth, but I sure as hell went to visit him, and my oh my did I ever laugh at his name. Hiccup they call him. Poor boy.
More time goes on, and nothing bad happens. Not for a while six months at least, and it was during this sixth month, early June, that I was overcome with guilt.
Agnarr has a younger sister, Arianna, who was betrothed at a young age, 12 or 13 I think, and was sent to live with her future husband and his parents in the Kingdom of Corona. This happened a few months before everything went down with the Northuldra Forest. Because apparently, according to Queen Tara who had learned of this after the Northuldra issue, King Runeard has a dislike for female children. Even his own.
So away his daughter went. Luckily, her betrothed wasn't too old, just around her age, and even more lucky, he's a complete gentleman who genuinely fell in love with her and vice versa. They married a year or two before Elsa's birth, and when they came to visit, Queen Arianna was heavily pregnant. She looked like she was going to pop any day.
And it's because of her being pregnant that I was so overcome with guilt. I mean, even if she wasn't pregnant I still would have felt bad, but since she was...well, I felt more than bad. More than guilty. I was devastated.
She and her husband had visited Arendelle in the beginning of June, hoping to stay for the entire month for their summer vacation and so they could get to know their six month old niece, whose powers they were well aware of since Iduna and Agnarr wrote to them about it. Very few people know of Elsa's powers. The only people who know are her aunt, uncle, parents', the Guardians and I (though they don't know that), and a few selected staff members. However, because of what happened...their vacation was cut short.
Elsa was playing on the floor in the living quarters, while the adults sat on the couch, talking and watching. I was playing with her too, and she must have gotten too excited because next thing we all know, a blast of ice goes shooting out of her hands, and accidentally strikes her aunt.
Corona's Queen fell cold immediately and the day after was declared drastically sick. Their visit was cut short because of this accident and they returned home. Two weeks go by when we hear of Queen Arianneas condition. Iduna and Agnarr were quick to read the letter that was sent to them from Corona, and upon reading it, they find out that Arianna is dying...
And so is her child.
Of course, all I could think about was Elsa and her mother and how they were both in a similar situation just six months before. I go to Queen Tara, praying that she'd be able to receive some more of the Bewilderbeast's healing blood, but instead she says:
"Actually, I found something else that doesn't involve any blood at all. I was doing some deep cleaning in my archives and found some old writings of mine that struck my interests. Long ago, so far in the past that I actually completely forgot about it, I had made a magical healing flower. It can heal the sick, injured, and can even keep someone young forever. Had I remembered it, I would have used it for Iduna, but alas you can't change the past. All that needs to be done in order for the flower to work is to sing it a very special song. I was bored at the time when I was creating it, so I was letting my imagination get the better of me.
However, in order to heal both Arianna and her child, she'll need to drink it. All you need to do is sing to the flower and drop it in some water as it glows. It should instantly dissolve. And coincidentally, it resides deep within the forests of Corona. I even managed to turn it into a myth. Everyone in that kingdom should know of the legendary flower. So if Frederick and Arianna believe in magic, which they should considering Elsa is proof of magic's existence, and because I'm sure Agnarr told them of his experience with the Elementals, then having them believe in this flower should be easy."
And so, she gives me the location of the flower, as well as the lyrics to the song, and away I went, telling her that this was something I needed to do on my own since I was the one who got Elsa excited and caused her to accidentally harm her aunt and cousin. She did, however, volunteer to watch over the Arendelle Royal Family in my absence.
She also vowed, on New Years, just a week after Elsa's birth, to never reveal herself to Iduna ever again, hung up on the idea that something bad will happen again if she does, even though she knows damn well that it was Pitch's fault the whole time. She's a mother though; it's her job to constantly worry.
Anyway, it took me no time at all to find the flower thanks to Mother Nature giving me the location, and when I found it, I was very surprised to see that an old woman was already there, singing to it and using its powers. I was left in shock at the change of her appearance, which changed from old to young in a matter of seconds. When the flower stopped glowing and the woman had no use for it anymore, she covers it with a handcrafted bush that honestly looked really real. She then climbed to her feet and pulled her hood over her head, leaving without a second thought.
I had wanted to follow her, to find out who this woman is and how she came across this flower. Because if she's using it to keep her youth then how old is she exactly? In her elderly form, she looked like she was on the brink of death.
But I didn't have the time, so I left her be. Knowing that the flower is where Tara had said it was, and that it most certainly works, I left for the kingdom. I wrote a note to the King of Corona, telling him of the magical healing flower's location, and left it beside the Queen as she slept. I waited until King Frederick found and read it, and when he did, I saw hope flash in his eyes. Hope that would have put Bunny in tears.
He assembled a search party, and while others didn't believe, the King's belief kept them going until they found the flower. They did as instructed, dissolving the flower as the King sang to it, making it glow, and gave it to his wife to drink. She gave birth hours later, on the Summer Solstice, to a beautiful, healthy baby girl with a head full of golden blonde hair. Hair that she most certainly didn't get from either of her parents.
Seeing her reminded me of her cousin, who I hadn't seen in quite a while, so once I made sure everything was perfectly fine, I made my way back to my new home, to Arendelle. Back to the infant that stole my heart.
And just when I think all is well, I hear a few days later that Elsa's cousin, who I found out was named Rapunzel, was kidnapped.
The Guardians and I searched for her for months, but not once did any of us find a clue. And it wasn't until Bunny, the Guardian of Hope, gave up...that I gave up too.
Life went on, and Elsa's first word was my name. Her parents were left confused and disappointed, but still somewhat happy that their daughter is starting to speak. I was in tears and beyond thrilled.
As she grows older, we begin to have conversations. Her parents assume I'm an imaginary friend. Elsa tells them I have ice powers like she does, so they assume that it's only natural for her, or for any child who is different, to make up a friend who is very similar to themselves. Despite the fact that she has me (although I know her parents don't know that), they say she's lonely.
So they decide to have another kid.
Elsa's sister, Anna, was born when Elsa was 2. She was born on the Spring Equinox, and it absolutely blew my mind because her sister and kidnapped cousin were born on the Solstices. It only made me wonder if there's a princess out there somewhere born on the Autumn Equinox.
The Four Seasons.
Anyway, unlike Elsa and Rapunzel, I did not need to save Anna. Everything went perfectly fine with Iduna's pregnancy with her.
And I've never been so relieved. I was on edge for the entire nine months.
As the princesses grow, they become inseparable. I was grateful that Elsa had someone when I wasn't around. Elsa even managed to make Anna believe in me, making her my second believer. She would have been my third if Rapunzel was never taken. I know deep down that she would have believed in me too.
Because after all...magic saved her also. I wonder if she has powers because of it too, but sadly, with her being kidnapped, I'll never know.
She would be Elsa's age now, and had she not been taken, I know the three girls would have been the best of friends. Elsa is a wonderful sister. She would have been an equally wonderful cousin.
More time passes, and when Elsa is 8 and Anna 6, I made a terrible mistake in leaving them.
I was watching the two sisters play a game they called "The Enchanted Forest", and of course, right when the game is getting intense, it's cut short when their parents make it to their room to give them a bedtime story. And what a story it was.
Because the story that their father told was based on true events.
Agnarr told his daughters about what happened to him while he visited the Northuldra forest, and while he spoke of this, my eyes were glued to Iduna's the entire time, catching her reactions. Because from what I was aware, I had no idea if she had told Agnarr that she was there or not, that she was the one who saved him. And according to Agnarr, he still had no idea, which meant that Iduna never told him.
Queen Tara had told her that day with the Bewilderbeast, when Iduna had confessed that Agnarr didn't know, to do what she felt was right. And I guess, to Iduna, that meant not saying anything at all.
Anna had swooned over her father's secret savior, not knowing that she was actually laying in that savior's lap and that the savior is her own mother, and eventually the princesses said goodnight to their father. Their mother, however, stayed a little while longer, and told them of a magical river called Ahtohallan, which I've actually been to before.
It happened after Tooth gave me my memory box when I became a Guardian. Upon seeing my old life, I...well obviously I became upset. I ran away for a long time, a month to be exact, trying to locate my former home, former friends, former relatives, newer relatives, but since I had no believers...I wasn't able to talk to anyone.
I wasn't able to get help.
And then...then I hear a voice. My sister's voice.
Emma's voice!
She called to me, and I followed.
I was led to Ahtohallan, the frozen river that Iduna spoke of, whose name I later learned from North when I had returned and told him of my journey, and of course, it wasn't an actual river at all.
It was a glacier.
Because glaciers are rivers of frozen ice.
And my was it ever a beautiful experience.
The memories of the past, of both mine, my sister's, and even my own parents were broadcasted on the icy walls, showing me things that my memory box full of teeth couldn't. Memory boxes only show the teeth's owner's memories, but Ahtohallan is able to show memories that belong to everyone that you love. Because water...
Water remembers. It holds memory.
While I there, I got my answers, and...I found myself. I truly found myself and it was then that I fully embraced who I am.
So when Iduna sung about the frozen river to her daughters, a lullaby native to her people, the lullaby she somewhat sung to Elsa when she was born, begging her to live, I pathetically teared up at how beautiful it was and how I longed to return to the glacier again.
To see the things that my memory box can't show me.
Anna was dead asleep before Iduna even finished her song, but Elsa stayed awake for the entire thing. Her mother even held her as they looked out the window, staring up at the Northern Lights that painted the sky.
That's when I realized the coloring of the lights and found out that it was actually North's signal for a meeting. I stayed in the room until Iduna left, and when she did, I whisper to Elsa, who was tucked in bed, "Sleep well, Snowflake. I'll be back."
"Where are you going, Jack?" She had asked, yawing in the middle of her question as she snuggled against her pillow.
I had smiled at that. "Santa's calling for a meeting. I can't keep the old man waiting. Don't want to get on the naughty list." I booped her nose then, and she giggled.
"You're always on the naughty list though," she said and I clutched the fabric above my heart in fake-hurt.
"You wound me so, my dear," I teased and she giggled again.
Music to my ears.
I kissed her forehead and did the same to Anna before leaving, knowing they'd be safe with Tara's Leafmen secretly lurking around. Pitch might have been off the radar for years, but we were all still worried for his next return. The Leafmen pretty much became Arendelle's secret, invisible guards.
And of course, Pitch Black was actually what the meeting was about.
According to North, Pitch had displayed a black, sandy figurine of himself on North's globe, a sign North had said. A warning.
That the Boogeyman is still here.
That he never left.
The rest of the meeting was us trying to come up a plan, but it was the same plan as before. Search the world for any signs of him and to always keep looking.
Because how can we come up with an actual plan if we don't know where he's at?
Afterwards, I'm returning to Arendelle.
Upon my arrival, I make it back just in time to see the King and Queen riding away from the castle on their horses. It wasn't until my eyes caught sight of an icy trail being emitted from the King's horse, that I noticed Elsa sitting in front of him, and Anna with her mother on the other horse. From what I could see, Anna was asleep, but Elsa...she looked upset.
I flew after them in a hurry, and when I was right beside the King's horse, I call out to Elsa. "Elsa! What's going on?" She was pressed against her father's back, and the tears I saw on her face caused my heart to ache. When she looked over at me and made eye contact, my heart did more than ache. It shattered.
"J-Jack," she whispered, but said nothing else. Her eyes and her voice were filled with fear, and while I wanted an explanation right away, I knew I had to wait.
"It's okay," I tell her. "I'm here."
I followed the King and Queen deep into the woods until we made it to a rocky region. Something about it felt...magical. It wasn't until the rocks started moving toward the royal family and exposed their true selves that I realized. Trolls. I've heard about them before, but I've never seen them in person. I was just as shocked as Elsa and the Queen. The King, however, didn't seem all that surprised.
Because of course King Agnarr wouldn't be surprised. He's probably read so much about magical creatures, especially after his time with the Northuldra. And since Iduna hasn't been around magical creatures in years, (and considering the last time she was around magic it was very violent ordeal), it was only logical for her to be scared, especially with her children being presence. She held onto Anna tightly, pressing her youngest daughter into her chest and slightly hiding behind the King, whose arm protectively went out to shield his wife and eldest daughter, who clung to his leg.
"It's the king!" One troll had said. Whispers followed after. I noticed that some trolls were looking at me, and I had to put a finger on my lips to signal them to be quiet.
The leader of the trolls made himself known, asked some questions, and next thing I know he's changing Anna's memories. Every memory she's ever had of Elsa using her powers was replaced with Elsa not using her powers. He took away every memory she had of Elsa's magic. He took away every memory of me and the other Guardians too. Her parents didn't see me or the other Guardians in Anna's memories as they hovered above us for all to see, but Elsa and every troll that was paying attention did.
And right before our eyes, I vanished in the memories, no longer there, no longer existing...just gone. So not only did Anna no longer have any memory of Elsa's magic, but she no longer had any memory of me too. She no longer believed in me. To Anna...I became a myth again. And what was the reason? To protect her. And I simply couldn't understand. Why would she need protecting from Elsa's powers? They aren't dangerous. They can be, but never around her sister are they even slightly dangerous.
So what the hell had happened that made them even think that?
I got my answer later that night, when Elsa locks herself in her room, not wanting to talk to her parents, who begged her to open up. She refused and eventually, Iduna and Agnarr give up and take their youngest daughter to sleep with them.
When they left, I made it my turn. I knocked on her door, told her it was me, and she opened it with no hesitation, wrapping her arms around me so quickly that I had stumbled backwards a little.
I held onto her as she cried, my heart breaking, and tried my best to comfort her. "Please don't cry," I said as I held her tight. "You know I hate it when you cry."
"It's all my fault, Jack," She sobbed, ignoring me. "Anna got hurt because of me. I didn't mean to hurt her."
"It's okay, Snowflake. Your sister is okay-" I began, but Elsa interrupted.
"But she doesn't remember I have powers now, nor does she remember you. She doesn't believe in you anymore, Jack, and it's all my fault."
I knew that no matter how many times I told her otherwise, she wouldn't believe me. After a moment, I gently pushed Elsa away from me so I could look at her. "Elsa, what exactly happened? You say that it's your fault, but...what did you even do?" I wiped a falling tear away with my thumb, and waited patiently for her to speak.
She looked away from me before answering. "We were playing in the Throne room. She was jumping from snow pile to snow pile. The piles reached almost to the ceiling. She was going too fast. I told her to slow down, and then...I hear this evil laughter come from beneath me. When I looked down, I see a shadow with golden eyes. The shadow grabbed my feet and pushed me down. Anna didn't notice. She went to jump, thinking that I was ready to make the next snow pile, but I wasn't. She was going to hit the floor and get hurt. I panicked and accidentally struck her in the head. It was me who ended up hurting her instead. This is all my fault!"
My heart stops at her words and my blood runs colder than it usually does.
A shadow with golden eyes? There's only one person with that description and that's Pitch Black, the Boogeyman. Who else could it have possibly been? First North assembles a meeting about Pitch, and now Elsa is telling me that a shadow with golden eyes tripped her. This is no coincidence.
And quickly goes the questions raging in my head.
What does he want with her? Why can't he just leave Elsa and her mother and everyone else in the family alone? What is he planning? Was the shadow North saw on his globe more than a warning? Was it part of his plan to get me away from the princesses? A distraction? He knew that upon seeing the sandy figurine on the globe that North would assemble a meeting. As a Guardian, he knew that I would go. He was watching the whole time! And where were Tara's Leafmen? Was Pitch able to sneak past them through the shadows? Are they okay?
"Jack?" Elsa's voice snapped me out of my thoughts.
"Sorry," I had said. "I got lost in thought."
"That's okay," she replied, sniffling. "Can you spend the night with me? I don't want to be alone. I'm scared."
"Don't be scared," I assured her as I embraced her again. Her tiny arms wrapped themselves around my waist again, and I rested my cheek on her head. "I'm right here. I'll protect you. I wasn't there for you tonight, and I'm so, so sorry, but I'm here now. Try to get some sleep okay?"
"Okay." Was her tiny reply.
I sat beside her after I tucked her in bed and sung to her a sung, a different one than the one her mother had sung earlier, and thankfully she was able to find sleep.
Sleep, however, did not find me.
The years go on after that and STILL there is no damn sign of Pitch. It's legitimately pissing me off. I told the Guardians everything Elsa told me after that night, and they agreed that it was no coincidence. They knew just as well as I did that the shadow Elsa saw was Pitch Black. We searched and searched and searched, but found nothing. Not only did we find nothing, but Pitch never made himself known to us again. Doing to us what he did before, showing up and hiding and showing up and hiding...it's annoying really.
Eventually, our searching stopped...again. The worry stayed, of course, but there was no lead for us to go on. We absolutely had no idea on what to do. So we pushed the issue away and lived our lives. But we always stayed alert.
I think I was more alert than anyone else, especially when Hiccup, the 15 year old heir of Berk, brought peace between the dragons and vikings. Pitch would have the time of his life if he managed to convince a new dragon rider to terrorize people from neighboring kingdoms and islands. So much like Arendelle, Tara sent out eyes to watch over Berk.
And while Hiccup grew to be an excellent leader despite his recklessness, Elsa grew to be...not reckless at all, which honestly I feel is a bad thing. Everyone needs to risks things once in a while, but Elsa? She wasn't up for it. She didn't want to risk anyone getting hurt because of her.
Not again.
She grew to hate and fear her powers, and no matter how many times I tried to convince her to love them again, she wouldn't listen. She wanted to learn to control them, and I did my best to teach her. To actually use them. However, my teachings did nothing. Her father's teachings, however, did.
I tried telling her that by loving her powers she is loving herself and that she must embrace them because they are a part of who she is. I told her that the more she practiced, the more she loved them, the more control she would gain. Her father told her the opposite.
He had told her to keep her powers concealed, to not let them show. He never said it out loud, but he was implying that her powers are bad, which they certainly aren't. Rather than listen to me, she listened to him, and of course she would. She was 8 at the time and he's her father It still blew my mind though. He deliberately separated her from her sister, and Elsa had the nerve to actually oblige in what he was telling her to do. She was willing to hide and isolate herself even though it hurt her all because her father told her to do so, and for the first time in my life...I hated Agnarr.
So did Queen Tara and for a little while I think Iduna did too.
And honestly...it scared me seeing him like that. Seeing him so fearful of the magic his daughter possesses. And the reason why it scared me is because...
It made me think of his father.
It wasn't until he forced her to wear gloves that I actually got angry with her.
And what did she do? She still didn't listen. Instead, she got angry with me too. She insisted that she wear the gloves, and...well...I let her. I couldn't just force her to not wear them even though I knew she truly didn't want to. Even though I knew she only thought she wanted them to be worn. She was being forced, whether she realized it or not, to wear the gloves, and there I was...secretly wanting to force them off of her when she clearly was not up for it. I
I sometimes think I should have went ahead and forced them off of her, burning them and every other pair she'd get into the fire. But...I wanted her to make her own choice, even if it was the wrong one. I wanted her to feel as though she was free to choose.
Because, to be frank, she was no longer free.
I didn't want to do what her father did.
I didn't want to take away her freedom.
I did, however, continue my begging for her to take them off, which worked a few times, but it was only to practice her magic whenever she felt she really needed to. She only ever took them off then and only then, which didn't happen often. I wanted her to keep the gloves off and to never wear them again, but that never happened. She even slept with them on.
It genuinely made me sick.
Things took an even worse turn when her parents died just last year.
Which was the last time I saw her.
They died in a shipwreck on their way to another kingdom for business. I was at the Pole with North, helping him carve some ice figures since he was bored (and what Guardian of Fun would I be if I had just let the poor man die of boredom?) Queen Tara was watching the girls at the time, and to be honest...I was glad for a break. Elsa just...she gave off these vibes that she didn't want anything to do with me and it hurt.
I needed a distraction and North helped with that. Our time was interrupted though when La Muerte had burst into North's office, crying.
"They're dead," she had said through her tears. "Iduna and Agnarr. They're dead." And while she wasn't as close to them as Mother Nature was, she was still really fond of them. After all, she still watched them grow up at Tara's side. Of course she'd be upset.
It had taken me a moment to understand her words, and when they had finally clicked, I'm quick to my feet, ready to fly off to Arendelle, but La Muerte...she wouldn't let me.
"No one knows they are dead yet," she had told me. "Only you, North, and I know. You can't tell her, Jack."
"Well, I can't just keep it from her either!" I had snapped back. "Her parents are dead! How can you expect me to keep something like this from her? Especially since I see her every day? Did you honestly think I would have been able to keep my mouth shut in her presence when I have the knowledge of her parents' death?"
"Jack," North says in a warning tone, and says nothing more.
Holy Death had looked away regretfully. "I knew I shouldn't have told you."
And that...well it pissed me off. "So wait you weren't going to tell me? You were going to do to me what you want me to do to Elsa? Keeping away the truth?" The Guardian of Death and Halloween opened her mouth to speak but I had cut her off. "And what exactly was it that changed your mind? Why tell me when you originally weren't?"
La Muerte didn't speak for a moment, her lips tightly pursed and her gaze sharp as she avoided eye contact. She was trying to remain prideful. "Because," she finally starts, sighing in defeat as her shoulders slumped. "I felt it..it just...it felt wrong." She looks up at me then, embarrassed due to me actually being right. "I...couldn't keep something like that from you."
I had chuckled, bitter and humorless, at her audacity. "Exactly. You're a damn hypocrite, you know that?"
Anger flashed in her expression rather than hurt. The fire in her eyes flared as her eyes pierced into mine in a deadly glare. One hand was turned into a fist, while the other pointed at me. "No, unlike you," she poked me hard in the shoulder, so hard that I had actually stumbled back a little and felt pain, "I am smart and know how to follow the natural law-"
"Elsa isn't exactly a natural human-"
"You will not tell her, Jackson. That is an order-"
"You're not the boss of me. I'm not a child-"
"Which is something only a child would say!" La Muerte shouted, her roaring voice shaking the ground. "You may be 18 years old for the rest of time, but that does not make you an adult. Just an immortal, immature child."
Tears sprung to my eyes, but I did not let them fall. "I never said I was an adult either. I'm...stuck in between." Which is something she knows I have struggled with before, so I can't believe she would bring that up.
I'm not entirely a child, not entirely a man. I want things from both sides of the spectrum. Before my rebirth, I never wanted all that adult shit, I still don't, but like every teenager there have been some...urges. And those urges have started up again just a mere few months ago, but that is something I am NOT going to get into right now. I'm still trying to deny them.
My fellow Guardian sighed and closed the distance between us with a hug. "I know, mijo. I am sorry for that. I am also sorry for yelling at you, but please Jack, I am begging you. Do not tell Elsa. Let her mourn with her family and kingdom when the news arrives."
"She won't tell anyone," I tried to reason as I pulled out of her embrace. "Not even her sister. I'm the only person she actually has conversations with. I don't want to ruin that by not telling her and her finding out that I kept the truth. Please. I...I can't lose her."
North and Muerte glance at each other, and a spark of hope ignites in me, but instead Holy Death sighs and says: "Jack, if you tell her...you'll only have her suffer longer than the rest. Do you really want that for her?"
And those words...they struck me deep within my core. As much as I didn't want to agree, I knew that she was right. Elsa is going to suffer, but it's not fair to have her suffer longer than the rest. It would be cruel of me to tell her. It's cruel anyway that I'm not. It's cruel either way.
"Alright, fine," I say in defeat. "I won't tell her."
And it was really, really hard. Elsa knew right away when I visited her afterwards that something was troubling me, but I assured her that I was fine, merely tired. But I lied. I wasn't tired. I was wide awake and anxious and guilty. She knew I was lying too, she knows me better than anyone else just as I do with her, but she didn't pry. She knows what it's like to harbor a secret.
The news of their death arrived a week later. Elsa and I were in her room, like we always are, reading some boring old books, when Gerda and Kai knocked on her door. She invited them in, they told her, and...well...things escalated.
The temperature dropped, Kai and Gerda's breath was visible and they began to shake, and frost...frost began to form on the ground under Elsa's feet. She didn't cry though. She was in too much of a shock. So much in fact that she didn't even notice the frost that was expanding on the floor or her staff members' reaction to it.
Kai and Gerda were well aware of her powers since the very beginning, and when Gerda took a step forward to try to comfort her heir, Elsa was snapped out of her trance, frighteningly stepped back, and calmly as she could be, told them to leave.
They reluctantly did as she said, and when the door closed, Elsa locks it and leans her forehead against it. Still she didn't cry. She didn't speak either, and neither did I. I didn't know what to say. What do you say in a situation like this? Saying I'm sorry just seems...weak. But it was all I had...
"Elsa," I had started, breaking the silence, "I...I am so so sorry."
And just like that, she releases the most heartbreaking sob I have ever heard. Her shoulders were shaking, ice formed on the door from where her hands were placed, and it started to violently snow. I knew she was just going to shove me off if I tried to hold her, but I did it anyway because I had to at least try to do something.
I was left in surprised when she instantly clung to me, quickly accepting the embrace I was offering. She was always afraid to touch anyone ever since the accident, no matter what the physical contact was, and no matter if she wore her gloves or not. That included me, even though she knew her powers couldn't harm me. Not unless she stabbed me with an icicle or something.
"They're gone," She says through her sobs. "They're gone, Jack. I didn't even tell them I love them! I can't...I can't do this alone. I need them! What am I going to do?"
"You're not alone." I reminded her. "I'm here. I'll always be here. We'll figure it out."
She doesn't reply back. Her response was another sob, and as she cried, I couldn't help but tear up. I squeezed my eyes tightly shut so they wouldn't fall and held her tighter. I rocked her back and forth and prayed to Manny for him to take her pain away.
I don't know how long it lasted, but eventually she calmed down, the snow stopped falling, and she hoarsely says, "C-can you stay with me? Please, I...I don't want to be alone."
"Of course," I whispered, rubbing her back. "Let's lay down okay? Try to find some sleep."
Elsa nods and we break apart from our embrace to lay down in her bed. She didn't bother with getting under her blankets; she laid down right on top of them and when I laid directly across from her she immediately clung onto me again, leaving no space between us. Her face was buried in the crook of my neck, her arms resting between my chest and hers, and while this wasn't the first time I've cuddled with her like this, it was, however, the first time I've cuddled with her in almost a decade. And...well...a lot can change during a decade. Elsa's not a child anymore. She's...well...a young woman.
One who is near my physical age.
And because of her being a teenager, and it being my first time cuddling with her, as a mature woman now, it all felt...so different.
I had an idea on what it could be, but paid it no attention.
Well...I tried to at least.
Eventually we both fell asleep, unaware that it would be the last time we would be together.
She was already awake when I woke up, sitting on her window seat, and looking outside. When I sat up, I had expected my movement or the creaking of her bed to catch her attention. Instead, she remains looking out the window, searching for something unknown to me. No more snow, frost, or ice clung to the walls, floor, or ceiling but I knew it wouldn't be like that for long. Soon they'll be coated again once Elsa has regained more energy. More tears.
"Hey," I said, softly so I wouldn't startle her. I grabbed my staff that was leaning against the wall before looking back at her and seeing her reflection through the window. Her lips tightly pressed together and her eyes...they were stone cold. I've never seen them look like that before. So angry. So...betrayed.
"How long did you know?" She asked, her voice deathly calm.
Confused, I say: "What?"
She had turned her head over to look at me, her eyes looking more cold in person than what they looked like through her reflection. "I said," she snapped, surprising me at her harsh tone, "how long did you know?" Her eyes the began to fill with tears. "How long did you know they were dead? They didn't just die yesterday. They were dead for a while. I know La Muerte knew and I know she told you. She wouldn't have kept it from you, so why did you keep it from me?"
Elsa knows all about the other Guardians. She and her sister have met us all. All except Queen Tara, who still fears of the bad luck that might occur if she's seen by mortals. What happened with Iduna, though it wasn't her fault, still haunts her. La Muerte was very hesitant to meet Elsa again, at the age where they start remembering, but unlike Queen Tara, she was not too afraid. For Death fears nothing.
Sometimes.
Anyway, I was at a loss for words. I never expected Elsa to figure it out and I felt so stupid. Of course she would find out. She knows what La Muerte does. "I...Elsa...I...I swear that I-"
"That you didn't know?" She interrupts, sounding more angry than hopeful. "I want to believe that, Jack, but I know better. So don't bother lying to me. Tell me the truth. Now."
I pursed my lips tightly shut and gulped, afraid of how she'll react. There's no way she's going to stay calm. All hell is going to break loose. A frozen hell. I'm honestly scared for it. Not because of her powers possibly getting out of control and hurting me, but because she might not want to talk to me after this.
"Y-yes," I stammered, nervously gripping my staff tighter. "La Muerte told me. She told me not long after it happened."
Elsa sucks in a sharp breath and her eyes fill with more tears and an even stronger flash of betrayal. "Oh my god," her voice cracks and she lets out a sob. "I...I didn't want to believe it. A part of me hoped that you really didn't know, but...I was right. You did know," she whispered as her body began to shake like it did yesterday. She then suddenly got to her feet, and with a stronger voice she screamed at me. "You knew!" So many tears began to fall from her eyes and ice, not frost or snow, but ice began to form under her feet and cover her fingers.
She didn't seem to notice it though. "You knew the entire time!" She yelled, the ice from her feet expanding at a quicker speed, and the fire burning brighter in her eyes. "And you had the audacity to visit me everyday and not tell me? How could you do that? How could you look at me with that knowledge and not tell me?"
"I wanted to!" I quickly jumped in, frantically trying to defend myself to her. "I wanted to tell you as soon as I found out. It killed me every day, but...I was ordered not to."
Elsa gives a bitter, humorless laugh. "Ordered? Jack, you barely ever listen to orders."
"I did it for your sake," I tried again, heart racing.
"My sake?!" She exclaimed. The ice was at her wrists now and still she didn't know. "You know what? Get out."
My eyes widen at those two words. "W-what? Get out? What are you-"
"I don't want to see you anymore, Jack!" She interrupts, her tears falling nonstop. "Just leave me alone."
That right there was what I was afraid would happen and it just came true. "Wait, Elsa, please," I dropped my staff and rushed to her, holding her crying face in my hands, which only made her cry harder as she grasped my wrists with her icy fingers, keeping me close even though I knew she wanted to push me away. "Please," I begged her, my voice shaking, "what can I do to fix this?"
"Tell La Muerte or Queen Tara to bring my parents back," she said, not even skipping a beat as she opened her wet eyes to stare brokenly into mine. "Please, I...I can't do this without my parents, Jack. I can't control my powers. How on earth will I be able to control a kingdom too?"
"I can help you with both," I said, honest and eager. She took it as a joke.
She laughed bitterly again and removed my hands from her cheeks. "No offense Jack, but I doubt you know the first thing about ruling a kingdom." She then walked past me to stand next to her bed, facing her back to me. The start of her pushing me away...
"You certainly don't know how to help me control my powers too," she went on after a brief pause.
Offended, I said: "Wait, what's that supposed to mean?"
She turns around to look at me again, the tears stained on her cheeks, making me want nothing more than to wipe them away. I would wipe them away forever if she'd let me. "It means, that your way of control consisted of too much emotion. The only way to control my powers is to conceal-"
"No it isn't," I interrupted, honestly a bit annoyed with her. "No offense, but your father's way of teaching you to control your powers is stupid and-"
"Stupid?!" Elsa interrupts, incredulously, and I realized that was the wrong thing to say. She stepped toward me, leaving a trail of frosty footsteps that I didn't notice earlier and pointed an ice-covered finger at me. "My father is dead and you dare insult his teaching methods? Just get out and leave me alone. I'm tired and I don't want to talk to you." Her gaze honestly gave me chills.
"Elsa-"
"I said GET OUT!" She stomped her foot and just like that spikes of ice suddenly sprung up from her feet, causing me to jump out of the way as they expanded towards me, going all the way to the window seat, traveling up the seat until it reached the window glass itself. If I had not jumped out of the way, it would have struck me, impaled me! Elsa was just as shocked as me and when she finally noticed her ice covered hands, she gasped and jumped back, more tears forming in her eyes.
"Jack, oh-oh my god...I...I'm so sorry," she whispered as she stared at the ice on her hands and floor in pure horror. "Oh my god...I'm a monster."
"Elsa-" I try again, my racing heart making me out of breath and my eyes as wide as salad plates, but she interrupts once more.
"Can La Muerte or Tara bring my parents back or not?" She suddenly asked again, her voice a sharp whisper as she looked away ashamed, wanting to change the subject. Wanting to ignore what it was she just did.
"No," I replied, reminding her of the answer she already knew. "They can't. You know they can't."
Elsa nodded and bit her lip as she hugged herself. "Then you should go and never come back. None of you should."
"Never come back?" I repeat, confused again "Elsa, I understand that you want me to leave so you can have time for yourself to mourn, but...never come back? I can't do that. I won't."
"Jack," she starts, sighing tiredly, "your purpose is to protect the children of the world and bring them fun. I'm 17 years old, no longer a child, and now that my parents are gone I have to start paying more attention to my purpose in life, which is being Queen. It's..." her eyes filled with tears again. "It's time we let each other go."
"But I don't want to let you go," I confessed, my voice breaking with my heart as my vision became blurry due to tears. "Elsa, I...I..." But I couldn't bring myself to say it. Those three really complicated words. The moment is wrong and I'd only make it worse.
"Don't push me away," I say instead. "Don't push me away like you did with Anna." And once again, I said the wrong thing. I just couldn't say anything right at all. The hurt that flashed in her eyes caused a huge amount of guilt to overtake me.
"I'm pushing her away to protect her." Elsa said after a moment of silent had passed. I would have apologized right away, but I was too consumed in guilt.
"But you're not dangerous!" I shouted, wishing she could get that drilled into her head.
"Not dangerous?" She repeated, incredulously. She then gestures to the ice sticking up from the floor. "Do you not see the ice that almost pierced you? Do you not remember that whole reason why I'm in this situation? I hurt Anna-"
"It was an accident!"
"Please, just go," she pleaded, "You're making this harder than what it already is. I'm just trying to protect you too."
That got a humorless laugh out of me this time. "No matter what I say or do, you won't believe me, will you? You're always going to think of yourself as a monster."
Elsa looked at me with sad eyes and nodded. "Yes, Jack. Because that's exactly what I am."
I shook my head again. "No, Elsa, you're not. You're not a monster. What you are...is scared. You're scared, Elsa, and last I checked, monsters don't get scared, especially of themselves."
"Please Jack," her voice cracked and the ice was up to her elbows now. "Just go already."
And I did. I respected her wish too. I never came back...
Or so she thought.
.
.
.
A.N: And that concludes the prologue chapters. I think. I HOPE! Haha. Sorry if Elsa was out-of-character and good god this chapter is LONG! I hope you enjoyed it! Drop a comment and stay tuned for more :D