Getting Blitzed Chapter 25

I was pretty sure the reason that chicks took all day to get ready for a wedding was so that they wouldn't have to deal with the bullshit small talk with guests while waiting for the shit to start. We were all milling around the ballroom, waiting to head outside for the ceremony. For all my mother's freaking out about having enough time and space to invite people, there were sure a fuckton of people here I didn't give a shit about. I couldn't be mad at her, though. In the end, I'd gotten to invite everybody on my team who wanted to come. Most weren't here, due to having had other plans, but my main boys had all made it.

"I'm incredibly glad I didn't go to Miami to get myself a date," Sammy said, sending a wave to a blonde across the room, some chick Reed Girl knew from the music program.

I snickered. "Just stay away from the ones who have a ring on their finger. Some of my mom's friends don't have any issues with fucking a younger man." I should know. There were a couple women here that Emmett or I had hooked up with a few years ago. My mom clearly did not know that shit, or they wouldn't have been invited.

"Hey, I don't mind an older woman. They know what they're doing in bed, and they aren't afraid to give a little direction. That's hot."

I rolled my eyes. "Don't say I didn't warn you." And now to do my groom duty. "Thank you for being here and being in the wedding party. It means a lot to me."

He grinned. "There's no place I'd rather be, man. Gotta have my quarterback's back in all things, including marriage to the lovely girl who got away from me."

Fuck that noise. "I locked that down before you even met her, so you can hardly say she got away from you. You never had a chance."

He sighed and put his hand over his heart. "Rub it in, why don't you?" He grabbed a glass of champagne from a passing waiter. "Why am I standing here with you when that gorgeous blonde is giving me the eye?"

I laughed. "Good question. Have fun, but don't disappear anywhere until after the wedding."

"Wouldn't think of it!" He took off, making a beeline for the blonde.

Before I had a chance to make an escape of my own, to duck into the bathroom and text my girl, her mother descended upon me.

"Edward!" I was enveloped in a cloud of perfume and clinging limbs. "I can't believe the day is finally here! My baby is marrying her handsome man!"

I couldn't be positive, but it almost felt like her hand ghosted across my ass before she released me. With Renee, it was entirely possible, regardless of the fact that I was marrying her daughter today.

"I'm excited too, Renee." I stepped back and took her in for the first time. Holy fuck. There was no way in hell that that was the dress she'd picked out with Reed Girl and my mother. No fucking way. This thing had a plunging neckline and was some kind of animal print. It didn't scream wedding, by any means. It looked like something a stripper would wear.

"You look, uh, ready to party." That was the only thing I could say for the monstrosity in front of me. Reed Girl was going to shit a brick when she saw that. Had she seen it?

"Don't I?" Renee smoothed her hands down the dress. "This is twenty times better than the dress Bella wanted me to wear. I mean, I was going to, since I don't want to outshine my own daughter on her big day, but then I heard that some of your teammates were going to be here. I wasn't going to look dowdy in front of sexy football players."

Fucking hell. I needed to warn my teammates to stay the fuck away from Renee. While her dress was inappropriate as hell, I had to admit that she looked good for her age. She could pass for early thirties instead of early forties any day.

"Right, well, most of them have girlfriends, I'm afraid." That was untrue as hell, but hopefully it would divert her attention. She should hit on some of my dad's friends. They had money, too.

Renee just threw back her head and laughed. "As if that matters! Now, who are you going to introduce me to first?"

Fuck. "Have you been in to see Bella yet?" I needed to know if I had to warn her about her mother's dress or not.

"No. Well, I peeked in a little bit ago, before I got ready. Your mother and the girls seemed to have everything under control."

That was Renee in a nutshell. Most moms would be planted at their daughter's side while she got ready, but not Renee. She was on the hunt. It was a damn shame she was single again. Not that that would have stopped her regardless.

She tucked her arm through mine. "Introduce me to some of these fine-looking men. My daughter shouldn't be the only one with a hot football player."

Fucking hell. Before I could come up with an excuse, I was rescued by the one person who knew what I was going through better than anyone else.

"Edward! This place is incredible. And wait until you see Bells. She's never looked more beautiful."

"Charlie!" I disentangled myself from Renee's vise grip and actually threw my arms around my soon-to-be father-in-law. "Thank you," I whispered in his ear.

He chuckled. "You're welcome."

He hugged me back before releasing me and then turned to his ex. "Renee. You look…" he broke off, unsure what to say, no doubt. "Wild."

That was fitting. I nearly snorted.

"Charlie." She gave him a nod, but I noticed her blue eyes were slightly narrowed. She was annoyed at the interruption. "You look well."

He smirked. "Don't I?" He fussed with his bowtie. "Had a hell of a time getting this sucker fastened. Good thing I had my girl with me. Edward, this is Sue. Sue, this is my son-in-law, Edward."

I shook hands with the woman, failing to bite back my grin. Sue was pretty, with black hair and dark eyes. Her skin was too tan for Forks, so I suspected she was from the Indian reservation that Charlie frequented with Billy.

"It's nice to meet you," I told her.

Renee shook her hand, a big, fake smile plastered on her face. "It's hard to believe you were able to get him out of his beloved flannel."

Sue laughed. "I didn't have to do a thing. He's so excited for this wedding. It's all he's talked about for weeks now."

Charlie cleared his throat. "Well, my grandson needs his parents to be married."

"As if that's why you're excited." Sue smiled at me. "He's thrilled you're going to be part of the family."

Didn't I know it? "I'm happy about it, too. It feels like I've been waiting to marry my Bella for years."

Renee made a tisking sound. "You're both so young!"

Really? I glared at her.

"Don't get me wrong. I'm thrilled you're getting married, but take it from one who knows. Settling too early can be a bad thing."

And now I was glad she hadn't gone in to see my girl. Wedding advice like that she could do without.

"That's only when you choose the wrong person," Charlie interjected, eying his ex with obvious dislike. "Edward and Bella are perfect together. You might know that if you spent any time with them."

Renee huffed. "I spend time with them! And I'm not saying they aren't right together. But they're young and they have a lot of challenges ahead. At least they're young enough that if it doesn't work out, they'll have plenty of time left to move on."

Jesus fucking Christ, was she serious? Who said that to someone at their own wedding? Before I could retort, a chilled voice came from behind us.

"Speaking of moving on, Renee, don't you think it's time you got changed? Surely you brought the dress we picked out for the ceremony."

Holy fuck. Danger! We all turned to face my mother, who wore a tight smile. Her green eyes were shooting daggers right at Renee.

Renee seemed to be unaware that my mother was ready to kick her ass. "Oh, no! I couldn't wear that beige suit thingy. It was so unflattering! It made me look like the grandmother of the bride, not her beautiful, much-too-young mother."

"Renee, we discussed this." My mother kept her voice low and the smile plastered on her face. "This day isn't about you. It's about Bella, and you look like-"

I grabbed my mother and steered her away before she actually finished that sentence.

"What are you doing? Do you see what she's wearing?" my mom hissed as we walked across the room.

"Yes, I do. And it's ridiculous. But if she wants to look like a desperate cougar at her daughter's wedding, let her. This day is not about her, as you just said. I really don't want our mothers fighting on our wedding day."

My mom sighed. "You're right. I'm sorry. It's just that the caterers may not have brought enough crab puffs, and the flowers are the wrong shade of peach, and-"

"Mom. It looks awesome. You did an incredible job with only a few weeks' notice. And if we run out of crab puffs, who gives a shit? There's plenty of food coming, and if we need more, we'll have the restaurant make us something. Everybody is having a good time. The flowers look perfect."

"But-"

I needed to get her ass calm. "Honestly, Mom. This is perfect. It's a great place to have a wedding. Everybody is having a good time already, drinking champagne and eating canapés and crap. You pulled it off. Now sit back and enjoy what all your hard work brought."

My mom took a deep breath. "You're right. When did you get so smart?"

I grinned at her. "When I met Bella."

She laughed. "That's the truth. She's perfect for you. And I just want everything to be perfect for both of you. I know I've gone overboard, but this is the only wedding I get to help plan." She glared over in Renee's direction. "I guess I should be glad she's so self-absorbed. God knows what this wedding would have looked like if she had her gold-digging hands all over it."

"Everything is better than I imagined. So Renee looks like an aging stripper. We'll keep her out of the majority of the photographs."

My mom burst out laughing. "That's more or less what I was about to call her when you hauled me away. It is fitting, isn't it?"

I put my arm around her. "Yes, it is. And one of us needs to warn Reed Girl so she doesn't freak out when she sees her."

My mom leaned against me. "I already sent her a picture."

I snorted. "What did she say?"

"That she wasn't surprised and if we were lucky, she'd find a man to sneak away with during the reception."

Now it was my turn to laugh my ass off. "That's my girl. As long as she's not upset, I don't care what Renee is wearing."

"You're right. I'll let her make a fool of herself. I need to go check in with the wait staff."

"No, you don't." I grabbed a glass of champagne from the nearest waiter and handed it to her. "You need to enjoy this day. Stop stressing. I'm marrying my girl today, something you've wanted since the day you met her, I imagine."

Mom beamed at me. "Of course I did! I saw the way you looked at her, and I told her that she was going to be part of the family one day. I'd been waiting for the day that you finally looked at a woman like she was the only woman in the world. The way your father looks at me. I saw it right away when she walked into the kitchen."

I smiled at the memory. She'd been in my jersey. It had been fucking hot as hell.

"Well, she is the only woman in the world to me. Other than you, of course." That got me a smacking kiss on my cheek. "Mom, seriously, thank you for all you've done. Planning a wedding would have been way too much on Bella's shoulders, with everything that's going on. You took all of that on and carried the stress that she would have if she were trying to get it all done. It means a lot to both of us."

She looked like she was going to cry. May as well set her off. "We want to thank you by giving you and Dad that Mediterranean cruise you've always wanted to go on."

She let out a gasp.

"We've booked it for January. Dad's going to clear his schedule."

"Oh, Edward! You don't have to thank me. You know that I'm thrilled to be part of this. I should thank you two for dealing with my insanity for the last month. And I don't need a present. I don't want to leave with the baby coming and everything."

I laughed. "The baby won't be here until May, Mom. You have time to go on a cruise with Dad. We want you to. You deserve some down time after all you've done."

She wrapped her arms around me. "When did my baby grow up and become such a caring man? There was a time you wouldn't have noticed or cared about all the time it took to plan an event for you."

That was true. I hadn't appreciated enough how she'd always been there, throwing awesome birthday parties and championship celebrations. I hugged her back.

"I guess Bella changed me, Mom. For the better."

She giggled and released me. "Definitely for the better. I'm so thrilled you found a girl I love and admire. This family is finally complete."

I laughed. "Well, it will be as soon as the sun sets. Can't you get on that?"

Mom grinned. "I've been monitoring the weather sites. We'll be good to go in about twenty minutes."

Fucking finally.

"Why don't you go round up your groomsmen? I'm going to start herding people outside."

"Sounds like a plan." I started heading toward Emmett.

"Oh and Edward?"

I glanced back at my mom.

"That nonsense Renee was spouting when I walked up? It doesn't apply to you and Bella. When a Cullen falls in love, it's forever."

Didn't I know it? "That shit didn't bother me. I know that Bella's it for me."

She raised an eyebrow. "Language!"

I laughed. Of course she'd get me on me about my mouth. She was still my mom after all.

"Don't you have people to yell at?"

She smiled. "I do, but I'll always make time to yell at you first. It's my motherly duty."

I shook my head and wandered over to my brother.

"It's time. Where's Jasper?"

"He went outside a bit ago. Maybe he's already down there. Where's Sammy?"

I glanced around and saw him pinned over by one of the walls, talking to Renee. "Fuck, Renee has him."

Emmett let out his booming laugh. "Trust her to go after the football players."

"It's not funny, damn it. Sammy's too good for her."

"Chill bro. I got this. I'll send her Colin's way."

I had to laugh. Colin did want a woman. "Just tell Sammy he needs to get in place. We're heading out."

"I'm on it!" My brother headed in that direction just as Jasper came in from outside.

"Where have you been? Do you have the rings?" I demanded when he got up close to me. Wait a minute. What was that smell?

"Oh, fuck no! Tell me you did not go get high on my wedding day?" I was going to kill him.

"Of course I didn't! I just had to take care of something. Look, my eyes are clear, right?"

I peered into his face. He didn't look high. He seemed normal, which was different for Jasper than most people, but he didn't appear stoned.

"Were you getting someone else high? What the fuck, Jasper?"

Before he could reply, the door opened and in came my grandmother. I braced myself for whatever snide words she might say, but she just sent me a smile. "Isn't it a beautiful day for a wedding? So pretty. The sky and all the colors."

She walked past, and I got a good whiff of weed mixed with old-lady perfume. Holy fuck. Was she…? No fucking way. "Jasper?"

"Yes?" He shoved his hands in his pockets and looked down at his feet.

"Did you give my grandmother weed?"

"Maybe. It depends on how mad you'll be if I say yes."

Was I mad? I didn't know. I was confused as fuck. "My grandmother smoked with you?"

"Not with me. I told you, I didn't have any." He met my eyes. "Look, a couple years ago, after we won the first championship, we got to talking outside and I got her to light up with me. It calmed her down and made her stop hating on you and Bella so hard. So, I've hooked her up now and then. I wasn't sure if I'd need to give her any today, but she started in on how you'd been trapped and all that stuff, so I took her outside and got her high. She won't be a problem now."

God help me, Jasper was a fucking genius. "I can't believe you got my grandmother high. I can't believe Grandmonster took the stick out of her ass long enough to try it."

He shrugged. "She's actually pretty cool when she smokes. She makes me cookies to pay me for the weed."

Grandmonster made cookies? Not in my lifetime. Holy fuck. "You're like an old-lady whisperer."

Jasper laughed. "Never doubt the magic of my weed."

I shook my head. "As long as you stay off it until the season is over, I won't say a word against it ever again." It turned the grandmonster into a human being. Who knew that was possible?

"It's all cool, Edward. I'm happy to help. That's what best friends, and best men, are for."

He really was my best friend, other than Bella. I wasn't sure how that had happened, but right now especially I was glad.

"Thanks." I gave him a half hug, which he, of course, turned into a full blown one. "Okay, we need to get outside now. It's nearly time. You have the rings, right?"

He released me and patted his pocket. "Right here. We're all set."

Good. It was time to marry my Reed Girl. I'd endure slutty mother-in-laws, uptight mothers, and high grandmothers anytime, as long as at the end of the day, I got to make Isabella Swan my wife. She was worth it.

Xoxoxoxoxox

I planted myself below the arch of flowers that sat on a platform on the beach. It was beautiful out. The sun was starting to go down, and the temperature was around seventy or so. We couldn't have asked for a better day. I had no doubt that my mom had been monitoring the weather like I'd be monitoring Reed Girl's diet if I was with her all the time. She'd probably done some voodoo rituals to ensure that it wouldn't rain. I wouldn't put it past her.

Jasper lined up next to me, while Emmett and Sammy hurried toward us.

"Thanks for sending your brother to rescue me, man. That woman doesn't take no for an answer. She is pretty hot, though."

I rolled my eyes. "Trust me, it's not worth the amount of crazy that would be unleashed on you if you went there."

"Bella would be pissed, huh?"

Ha! As if Reed Girl was the problem. "No, I'm talking about Renee. She's looking for her next husband."

"Oh. Shit. No way." Sammy shook his head emphatically. "I mean, I'm happy for you, but no way am I ready to walk down the aisle. This is as close to that as I need to be."

I had to laugh. "You sound like I did a couple of years ago. When you find her, you won't be able to wait. Trust me."

Sammy just scoffed. The fool. He'd find out one day, and I'd be there to laugh at his ass.

Everybody started filing down and taking their seats. Thank fuck. It was time. The sky was starting to get dark, and the yellow, red, and orange started to streak with the greens, blues, and purples. This was what we'd been waiting for.

The grandparents and parents made their way to their seats, with the exception of Charlie, of course. GrandMonster had a happy smile on her face. I was pretty sure I'd never seen that expression on her face live and in person. Maybe in some pictures and shit. Jasper really was the man.

"Thanks for that," I muttered, nodding toward her.

Jasper grinned. "No problem. She's actually a lot of fun when she's high. You should talk to her later."

Maybe. I had much better things to do, though.

The girls started down the sandy aisle, which was littered with peach and white flower petals. Bella was hidden in the doorway. I saw Charlie, but I couldn't quite make her out yet. Four Eyes-Angela-came first. She moved pretty quickly, thankfully. Hurry the fuck up, Blondie. We're not here for you. Of course, my brother was beaming at her. Jasper let out a girly sigh when Shorty appeared.

"Isn't Wife beautiful?" he murmured.

I nodded my agreement so he wouldn't get worked up about it.

At last, the music changed and my Reed Girl stepped into view. Holy fucking shit. Charlie hadn't been wrong when he said she'd never been more beautiful, but he had underplayed it. Extremely underplayed it. I'd always thought that "she took my breath away" stuff was bullshit, but I definitely stopped breathing for a few seconds. I was incapable of gasping the way the guests were at the sight of her. Clearly they'd never seen anything more stunning either.

I didn't know shit about dresses, cuts, and things like that, but I knew what looked good, and my Bella was definitely that. The dress fit her perfectly, skimming down her body. It wasn't one of those big poofy dresses that some girls wore. This showed off the killer body that my girl was rocking, without making her look trashy like her mother. It had little straps and went down into a v, keeping her spectacular tits mostly covered. There were some little flowers trailing down from them. The dress looked soft as hell. I couldn't wait to get my hands on her.

She looked like she felt the same way I did, because her eyes met mine and she smiled. Her hair had some flowers in it, but it was mostly down, curling past her shoulders. I was grateful for that, too, because we wouldn't have to waste time fussing with that shit when I got her back to the room.

"Wow, she looks awesome," my brother whispered to me. Of course, his version of whispering was a normal person's regular voice, so everyone heard. There were some laughs, and Reed Girl just grinned at him and mouthed thanks.

After what felt like hours, she finally was next to me. Charlie handed her over, and I took her hand in mine. I think we were supposed to link arms or some shit, but I didn't care. I wanted to hold her hand, so I did.

The priest did his spiel. I probably should have been listening to him, but all I could do was stare at my girl. We weren't giving anybody a chance to object, not that they would if they wanted to live. He talked about love for a few minutes before he finally got to the good stuff.

"It is now time for the vows. Edward."

Right. My turn. Reed Girl's lips twitched, and her brown eyes sparkled at me when I was stuck for a second. I shrugged. "You're so beautiful that I forgot what I was supposed to say."

"I, Edward," the priest prompted.

I had this. "I, Edward, take you, Bella, for my lawful wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and health, until death do us part." That shit was a little morbid, throwing in the death thing, in my opinion, but it was tradition and nobody would listen when I'd argued against it. I'd also argued against using poorer, because we were never going to be poor, but they told me that was crass. Whatever. I knew what was real.

Reed Girl laughed so softly only I could hear. She totally knew what I was thinking.

"I, Bella, take you, Edward for my lawful husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and health, until death do us part."

I couldn't contain my grin. She was mine now. I mean, the priest hadn't declared it or anything, but vows were vows. Promises. And we'd made them.

The sun was sinking lower, and we were supposed to be declared husband and wife as it disappeared. Nearly there.

"May I have the rings?"

Jasper handed that over without a problem, thank God. I couldn't wait to get mine back on my finger. I'd had to give it to the jeweler last week at Reed Girl's request. We were getting them engraved, and I wasn't allowed to see what she'd chosen for me until right now.

"I'm told that Edward and Bella had their rings engraved, so I'm going to ask them to read the engravings aloud before they slide them onto one another's fingers."

I grinned at Reed Girl as I took the offered ring. "Your ring says, 'You're the best prize I ever won. Love, Your Champ.'"

This time, she did laugh out loud, along with our friends and several of the guests. There was a tear in her eye, though, despite the amusement. "You're lucky I understand that, Cullen."

I slipped the ring on her left finger. She was wearing her rock on her right hand. We'd put that back where it belonged after the ceremony.

Bella took my ring and held my hand. "Yours says, 'You brought real music into my life. Love, Your Reed Girl.'"

Fuck if that didn't make me want to cry myself. She slid the ring onto my finger, and we turned to face the priest.

"What God has joined, let no man put asunder. I now pronounce you husband and wife. Edward, you may kiss your bride."

It was about fucking time. "You're mine officially now, Reed Girl."

"And you're mine."

Damn right I was. Forever.

A tear tracked down her face. I reached out to wipe it away.

"Hurry up and kiss me, Cullen."

She was so fucking demanding. I loved it.

"Shut up and let me, Cullen."

That made her laugh. And while she was laughing, I pulled her into my arms and planted one on her. I could vaguely hear cheering, but I ignored that shit and just focused on the feel of my wife's lips on mine.

My wife.

At fucking last.