I changed the story's name to Desires as it's a more befitting title now.
The long war had finally come to an end and Felix wanted to laugh and just how seemingly quickly it came to an end with Byleth's return. Would the war have even lasted so long had she not fallen asleep? He thought he would be bitter with her return, she got to sleep for five years while he had to fight for survival. He was sure such negative thoughts and feelings would have plagued him and yet all he felt was relief and joy.
Those pure feelings didn't exist during the celebration. The ale was good or at least it was better than the crap he had acquired during rations, it had been a long while since he could just drink and not worry about the consequences. Despite him not like being in loud, crowded places, for that night he had been willing to make an exemption and just lose himself to the celebrations, at first. Everything was okay at the beginning but then a bitter feeling slowly started to take over and all he could focus on was how men were quick to cling to Byleth.
They were all so eager to pour her drinks, to talk to her, to dare pull her attention away from him. The Boar was the greatest offended and would even be so bold as to wrap an arm around her to direct her to some goddess forsake table. When some no name soldier dared to slip in close to her and drag her attention away, yet again, Felix had enough and left.
His fingers twitched with the desire to break something but with his lack of familiarity with Enbarr or its castle, finding a nice, proper, or at least discrete way of venting his anger was another frustration he didn't want to deal with. He stomped his way through the castle, in search of an exit as he decided some fresh air might do him some good. After a long, frustrating search he found a set of doors that lead him out to the gardens. Laughter erupted out of him at the pristine and peaceful scenery before him as it didn't look like it was touched despite a massive battle having taken place in the castle not too long ago.
He had half a mind to turn around and leave and yet he didn't. He strolled through the gardens, relaxing to the scent of flowers. He didn't know when it started but he knew why he took a liking to flowers, Byleth. Flowers had meant nothing to him once upon a time, but she loved them and floral tea and eventually he came around to them too.
The calming scent didn't comfort him for long before the image of the Boar, wrapping an arm around Byleth, appeared in his mind. With a loud growl he stormed his way back to the doors, eager to get far away from the gardens and possibly the castle. With unnecessary force he slammed the doors open and briefly froze when it smacked into something. He peered around the doors and discovered it was Byleth, he hit, and she was sitting on the floor rubbing her nose.
Felix shouted her name as he rushed over to her. An apology was about to spill from his lips but was lost at the large, toothy smile she was sporting. He was frozen in place; his hand was only partially extended out to her but that didn't seem to bother her as she slipped her hand into his. It was only a small part of him that was aware of everything and pulled her onto her feet.
"I found you!" she shouted in a volume he never heard from her, outside of battle.
He looked at her for a bit and then frowned. "Are you drunk?" he asked and the pout she was wearing was adorable, though he didn't acknowledge that thought.
"I'm not drunk." If anyone else had said that he might have been inclined to believe them, with her lack of slurring and the usual impeccable posture; she could have fooled anyone but him. While she was no longer expressionless as she once was, she normally wasn't as expressive and loud as she was then.
With a slight shake of his head, he muttered, "yes, you are."
"I'm not drunk!" She gave him a small glare and he just looked at her. "Fine, maybe I'm tipsy. But I assure you that I am not drunk." He frowned but relented. Even though he had never seen her drunk, she at least didn't seem like a typical drunk, but then again, she was always anything but normal.
"We should get you to your room at least." He reached out for her, but she stepped back. With an almost adorable pout (he still wasn't going to allow himself to acknowledge that thought), she folded her arms across her chest.
"I don't wanna."
"What?"
"I don't wanna go!" She stomped her foot for added measure.
"Excuse me?" Her acting like a child was something he was having an incredibly difficult time registering.
"I don't wanna go!" she repeated with another stomp. He blinked a few times, but everything was still a mystery. With his guard down, she wrapped her arms around one of his and pressed herself against him before looking up. "I wanna stay with you!"
His thoughts were racing, and his cheeks were a blaze. Those large, emerald eyes that he was always helplessly drawn too, were looking up at him and he was paralyzed. Not a single thought of his could settle, so he just continued to stare at her.
"Felix?" she called softly, and it sent his heart rate soaring.
He pulled his arm free and stumbled back as finally a thought broke through the chaotic mess that was his mind. He watched her carefully, unsure of what to do next. The pout she wore was stirring something with him, something that he had been desperate to suppress after he held her after her breakdown.
Byleth had been his goal since he first saw her wield a sword. At first, he wanted to surpass her, to make up for his inability to do so with Glenn but slowly that goal shifted, and he was afraid to know what it was now. She had become a future he could never foresee before they were reunited, and it wasn't a future he was he was sure he could fit into.
His palms were sweaty, but he kept his gloves on for protection. But protection from what? And for who? He swallowed away the lump in his throat as his body twitched with a nervous energy. The more those emerald eyes stared at him the more control he found himself losing.
"Felix," she said, and he jolted up right. She took a step forward and he wanted to take a step back, but he was rooted in place. Slowly she reached out to him and she pressed her hand against his forehead. Every fiber of his being was acutely aware of her touch. "Are you feeling alright?"
He wanted to speak but his mouth was incredibly dry. His fingers twitched with the desperate desire to touch her, but he fought against it. He stared down at her because he couldn't bring himself to look at anywhere but her.
What happened to his earlier anger? He desperately wanted to know how she could disrupt him so easily and how that didn't bother him. He always needed to be in control and yet whenever she was involved, he was always so eager to give it up to her. Deep down inside he knew the answer, but he was afraid to admit it, not when she was a complete mystery.
She said his name so sweetly again (or at least it was to him). His heartbeat was drumming loudly in his ears, drowning out everything but her. The longer she stared the more he felt himself losing control, and yet he couldn't -wouldn't- entertain the thought of escaping.
"W-what do you think of me?" he suddenly blurted out in order to break free from her trance. With wide eyes, his face burst out into a dazzling shade of red as he realized what he just asked. He wanted to run away but it had been a question plaguing him for so very long that he was unable to move; he needed to know the answer.
"What I think of you?" she asked with that usual head tilt of hers. Unable to find his voice, he was barely able to muster up a small nod. She stared at him long and hard and he began to squirm a little, his usual bravado seemingly gone.
"I find you incredibly handsome." He could feel the tips of his ears begin to heat up. Well that wasn't exactly what he wanted to hear but it was still nice, nonetheless. "You make me desire things…Things I never knew that I wanted…" He perked up at that.
Byleth's cheeks had a nice shade of pink coloring them and her gaze settled on the floor. "I always feel this strange coil in my stomach when you look at me. And every time I find that I want…things…" He arched an eyebrow as his voice was no where to be found causing him being unable to demand for more information. She fidgeted with her hands for a moment before glancing at him. "I want you to look at me…to touch me…to…" Her voice began to trail off into a frustrating quietness, but he still managed to hear it, "take me…".
A spark ignited into a raging fire within him and he became painfully aware of his body reacting to the meek, little look she gave him, a look he never realized he would enjoy seeing so much from her. He flexed his hands several times, in a failed attempt to stall the rush of his blood. As much as he loved hearing how the woman, he so very much fancied, wanting him, it wasn't really a thought he wanted to entertain at that a moment; at least, not until he was in the privacy of his own room.
She was a little too tipsy, he concluded as there was just no way, she would have ever admitted such a fact to him under normal conditions. He needed to get her to her room soon, less he loose control of himself to a more animalistic side of him. Placing a hand on her back, he instantly regretted it as he felt the fire within him grow.
Those innocent, emerald eyes looked up at him and he wanted to swear, along with many other things. She just had no idea what she did to him. She took a step closer to him and he had been to busy fighting with himself to notice and take a safe step back.
"I also want you to kiss me."
That was it, the final straw, and he threw all his inhibitions away. Gripping her arms tightly he slammed her against the wall and hid her gasp with his lips. Their teeth clanked against each other in their awkward first kiss and neither of them could give a damn.
"You," he growled out before slamming his lips against hers again.
Their teeth bumped against each other as they struggled to find the right angles. Soon their tongues were fighting for dominance, instead of exploring each other. It wasn't long before the frustrating need for air forced them apart, but a thin line of saliva connected them.
"You…," Felix growled out between gasps, "you have no idea what you do to me!"
Those emerald eyes that excited him way too much, looked up at him and he dug his fingers into her arm; there was a new look to her eyes, an incredibly thrilling new look. A smirk danced on her lips as she got ahold of her breathing faster than him. Their little link of saliva broke as she brought herself closer to him.
"Show me."