Ben tries to sigh quietly because he's aware he's in class. The big red B on his history of magic paper is glaring up at him from his hands. Not quite up to his standards. But there just isn't enough time in the day. There's too many phone calls, meetings, and paperwork for running the kingdom. He's trying his best to keep up with all his schoolwork, his responsibilities as king, and Mal but feels like a failure.
Even when him and Mal are snuggled up in the movie room of the castle he can't shut his mind off. Ben's mind is racing a mile a minute thinking about the new tax bills being proposed from different regions of the kingdom.
He stares blankly into the distance until Mal happens to glance up at him from her position cuddled into his chest. He feels her shift and his train of thought is broken. Ben looks down to find Mal smiling up at him completely unaware that he hadn't been here with her. A wave of guilt hit him like a truck. Mal remained unaware.
He leaned down to press his lips to hers, holding her face with the hand that wasn't cuddling her. Ben felt he didn't deserve her. Here she was struggling to adapt to his crazy lifestyle. Trying her hardest to fit in. And he was here thinking about work when he should be focused on her. He finds himself unable to give her all the time she deserves. He wished desperately he could make it up to her. Ben wished he could be worthy of her, times like these he felt like he wasn't.
Ben tried his best to make more time for her in the next week. But every time he carved time out his responsibilities as king seemed to get shoved in its place. He catches her at lunch on Wednesday. She's sitting with Evie, Doug, Carlos, and Jay on the lawn. Laughing and carefree, she looks more relaxed than he's seen her in awhile. More relaxed than Ben's seen her with him. It makes his heart ache because he knows he's the cause of her not being able to be at ease. His crazy life and his responsibilities.
Mal sees Ben from across the lawn and a smile breaks out. She waves him over hoping he can sit with them today. A flood of happiness flows through her as he starts walking over. Everyone gives him a hello but continues on with their conversation, being heated in debate.
"Guys I can do it myself, I don't need any help." Evie dismisses Jay and Carlos.
"Absolutely not Evie it's my turn." Jay states plainly.
Ben watches the exchange with intrigue, what were they arguing about?
"That's not true it's my turn! You did it two weeks ago Jay!" Carlos exclaims.
Doug starts laughing, "How many times must you guys go round and round. I'll be the judge. It's Evie's turn, you guys did it the last two times. Jeez I've never seen anybody fight over laundry before."
Ben cocks his head to the side completely confused, "uh what?"
"They're arguing over who gets to do the group's laundry this go around. This happens every time the laundry piles up." Doug explains.
"Wait a second you guys are arguing over who gets to do the laundry?!" Ben looks shocked then he looks down at Mal for some kind of explanation.
Carlos cuts off any response she might have had. "It smells so good when it's done and feels so soft."
It dawns on Ben they probably didn't have clean clothes or sheets very often, if ever, on the isle. His mood plummets as his guilt skyrockets.
Mal is blushed in embarrassment when he looks down at her and she tries to play it off. "What?"
Mal wants to move on from the moment. She points at the box Ben's been holding, "What's that?"
Ben is jarred from his thoughts on what he had just realized and is also quick to move past it, not wanting Mal to get upset or anxious. "They're strawberries! I brought them for you!"
"Ben that's so sweet." Mal gives him a kiss on the cheek.
"What's the occasion?" Evie asks.
"No occasion. I just wanted to give you something nice." Ben hugs Mal to his side.
"Making us all look bad," Doug grumbles out a joke. Evie is quick to hold his hand and get mushy.
"Nothing could make you look bad you're perfect." Evie gives him a peck on the lips.
"No you are." Doug squeaks out.
Everybody else breaks the moment by bursting out laughing. Ben looks down at Mal. Through his laughter he asks, "Tell me we aren't that bad?"
"Even you guys aren't that bad," Jay interjects, emphasizing the word even. Which only spurs on a new round of laughter from everyone. Evie starts throwing pieces of her bread at all of them.
After lunch, Mal has a free period so Ben decides to walk her back to her dorm before heading to his sword and shields practice period. Her hallway is oddly deserted when they arrive at her door. They both look at each other and suddenly they're inside and shutting the door behind them. Ben is franticly kissing her, tangling his hands in her hair. It has been way too long since they had had the opportunity to be alone together.
"Can you skip practice?" Mal whispers.
Ben struggles with his responsibilities but can't stop kissing her. "I really can't." He groans in frustration breaking the kiss but not letting go of his grip on her body.
She looks down embarrassed and mouths an "oh".
"I'll be late I can be late." Ben rushes out, desperate to have one moment with her where he isn't overcome with guilt. He doesn't give her any chance to get upset before he's thumbing her nipple. Ben needs this. They both need this.
Mal reaches for his belt buckle to undo it. When he realizes what she's doing he's quick to bring her hands back up around his neck. Ben knows they're already playing with borrowed time here and he needs to take care of her. He's already been neglecting her enough there's no way he could be selfish like that.
He doesn't leave her room to feel rejected because he's kissing her so fiercely both their lips start to feel raw. He gently pushes her back so she's against the door and grips her hips, pushing his own against hers.
Then suddenly the door is trying to move behind her. Ben and Mal break apart with a gasp and stumbling backwards letting each other go.
"What the he-" Evie throws open the door with force not knowing what was blocking it. When she sees Ben and Mal's appearance she let's out a small shriek of surprise, which she abruptly cuts off. Both their clothes are wrinkled and knocked out of order. Their lips are wet and pink. Mal is looking down at her feet, her face red hot. Ben is wide eyed and running his hand down his face.
"Evie we-" Ben tries to explain then shuts his mouth. There's no other explanation than the painfully obvious. He rubs the back of his neck not sure what to do or say.
Evie's shocked expression melts into a smirk. "I just left a book here for class." She moves past them to her sewing table to grab it.
Ben turns to Mal and takes her hand to make her look at him. "I have to get to practice okay. I'll see you later." He's willing her to show him any sign that she's okay. Ben knows his time is up. They shouldn't have even let themselves get as carried away from their responsibilities as they had. He gives her a loving kiss on the cheek, thinking she might die if he kissed her on the lips right now. Then he's grabbing his bag he threw on the ground in their haste and backing out the door. He smiles at her for as long as he can on his way out, hoping that she's okay. His guilt it back full force.