There was only rage and confusion in his friend's eyes.
Sora kind of understood. He was also feeling a whole jumble of things as he stared back across the stretch of sand that separated him and Seifer. His stomach was a knot of everything mish-mashed together and it felt...well, it felt not good. A mix of nausea, frustration, anxiety yet somehow in the midst of all that, hope.
He wasn't quite sure how to express anything, so his only outlet at the moment was rapping lightly at the side of his leg with an idle finger. Didn't accomplish much, but it helped with the swirling buildup of energy coursing around inside.
Part of him was still furious, he wasn't going to kid himself about that, but before he could channel anything into any sort of reprimand, his jaw clamped up and nothing came out. It felt far too wrong to yell. Seifer just needed help too, after all. That didn't make it any easier to set aside all the other emotions rattling around inside, though.
Besides, no matter what Sora wanted to say, how was he even supposed to break the ice with this sort of thing in the first place? Awkwardly interjecting with a 'hey, so about that murderous rampage master plan thingy you had...' didn't exactly seem like the best idea.
Flip-flop went his thoughts. Just like a fish, splash-sploshing around. Clearly it didn't help that in the uncomfortable silence all he could hear was the distracting and repetitive patter of water dripping somewhere far back in the cavern.
As much as he didn't know what to say, and as jumbled as everything felt, Sora knew he had to help somehow. Standing around wasn't going to change a thing, but he had never felt this clueless before.
"Seifer, I...I'm never going to give up. Not until everyone is safe. And I still want to...I'm still going to save you, too."
His friend didn't seem to even hear what he said, his eyes focused miserably on the ground.
"Why...?" It wasn't a question so much as a defeated murmur directed towards the sand. "Why did she protect you?"
Sora glanced slightly over his shoulder to where Kairi was still struggling at staying awake. It didn't look like she was going to win that fight, and would probably be fast asleep soon. He wanted to go back to her and hold her hand tight until she fully drifted off. Reach out and brush the bangs out of her eyes...or maybe not, because it was almost too adorable seeing her sleepily unable to fix the ruffled mess of hair in her face.
Her expression so soft, lips just lightly parted...now that he thought about it, they were pretty soft, too. Sweet and-
He shook his head to clear it.
Don't get distracted. Don't get distracted.
Now really wasn't the time for that.
But it was still so hard not to feel his heart swelling with pride at how amazing she could be when she really set her mind to it, and how much she had helped him.
"I don't wanna put words in her mouth, but Kairi told you earlier why. She is fighting f-"
Seifer punched the sand and bristled. "Not her."
His eyes snapped upwards, rage sparking even more furiously from their center. "My sister! You think I wouldn't recognize her magic!? Wouldn't notice this!?"
Seifer wrenched on his lapel, presenting it aggressively in his direction. Sora looked, but he wasn't sure what he was supposed to be looking at. It was just a shirt?
"There's nothing there..."
Trembling, Seifer clenched his teeth and rose back up to his feet. "Exactly, you moron. Nothing is there. But something should be, remember? Her pin. The one she entrusted to me. It's gone."
Sora saw dark vines suddenly shoot towards where he and Riku were standing like arrows. Before he could even shift positions to dodge, the vines were consumed with bright sparks of light. When the brightness dimmed enough for him to stop squinting, Sora only saw their ruined traces strewn listlessly across the ground. A few golden feathers drifted down to the sand shortly after them, and Sora finally noticed exactly how many of those same feathers already littered the area. Had he somehow missed some flock of magic doves migrating through or something?
Before he could question any of it, the witch idling nearby cleared her throat to get his attention.
"Familiars are wonderful creatures you know. They can take on quite a variety of shapes. Some look immobile, seemingly dead. Others act as vibrantly as a faithful companion. But all will spring into life when called upon. It's a treat to see such a complicated spell executed so successfully and I applaud the talent involved."
She started clapping, but Sora wasn't sure what for. Certainly it wasn't for anything he did, that was obvious.
A familiar...?
Sora glanced down, puzzled, at the strewn feathers. He didn't get it, but he quickly shook his head and refocused again. Wrapping his head around magic mumbo-jumbo wasn't important right now, after all. He checked back with Riku quickly.
While quiet, Riku's eyes were shifting across the cave, taking in every detail as if analyzing it all for some minute clue. Reaching down to the sand, he gripped a fistful of some nearby feathers and flicked one with his finger. It clinked, like he had just tapped a delicate crystal glass.
Shrugging, Riku offered one over to him.
"It's magic, obviously. But if this is really what I think it is, you might want to hold on to one."
"Sure." Sora jam stuffed the feather into a spare pocket, eliciting a small chuckle from his friend. Confused, he gave Riku a shrug when he was done squishing it all in. "...What?"
"Nothing." Gesturing over to Seifer, still slumped in the sand, Riku's expression once more hardened. "As for him, I think he's more likely to listen to you."
Maybe.
Seifer's pain was almost palpable. Surges of dark energy rippled and encircled his trembling form. It was frightening. Intimidatingly so. Steeling himself, Sora took one unsure step towards him. It was scary, but he knew that just like with Riku, under all those layers of anguish and pain was just a lonely brother who wanted his sister back. At the very bottom of all that hatred, somewhere, was his friend.
Sora took another step. And another. But on the next, Seifer's hateful gaze snapped up at him and he froze.
"You don't understand how it feels, do you!? I was one of the best, then almost overnight a little punchbag runt starts overshadowing me. A little pathetic nothing with no clear future is suddenly beating me at every turn. Even claiming to have saved my sister before I had the chance! A task so obviously meant for me! I can't stand it! I can't stand you!"
Spittle foamed at the corner of Seifer's ranting mouth, and Sora was suddenly astutely aware of how dry his own mouth had become.
"Seifer, I wanted to ask you to help, but there wasn't a lot of time and it was...complicated. I figured the most important thing was getting her out of there. I didn't think-"
"Exactly. You didn't. Not that you ever do." His chin wobbled and he cursed once more, loudly. "She is protecting you. Not only are you spitting in my face, now my sister too chose you over me."
"I'm not-"
In response, Seifer tried to attack again, but his dark vines met the same fate as the ones before. The glowing feather in Sora's pocket enveloped the very area he stood with a golden light, like a bubble of protection. Riku's feather did the same. Without any other weapon at his disposal, Seifer resorted to spewing a tirade of swears in his direction, some including quite a few specks of spit along with them.
Ignoring the vitriol, Sora once more began his slow approach towards his friend but was momentarily pulled back by a sharp tug on his arm. Riku was giving him one of his typical looks. To someone not as in tune to his expressions he might just look angry, but Sora knew him a bit better than that. If he had to put it into words, Riku's words in particular, the face his friend was giving him now would probably be saying something more along the lines of 'You are about to do something really stupid. I know I can't tell you not to do it because the minute I turn my back you totally still will, but you'd better realize how serious this situation is. Just to be safe, I'm coming with you. Not because I condone what you are doing, but because someone needs to save you from yourself.'
A mouthful when said out loud, but Riku was particularly good at conveying quite a lot with just that single expressive stare. And...maybe it was kind of bad that the two of them had gotten into enough scraps that such an expression was common place between them. More likely, the issue was that Sora had done far too many stupid things that Riku had been forced to save him from in the past.
Aaand I'm probably about to add another stupid thing to that list...
The thought almost made Sora smile, despite the current situation.
Keeping his voice low, Sora gave his friend a careful nod.
It was risky, but he knew what to do now. It had worked with Riku before. The only hang-up was, Seifer had to actually want his help first.
Seifer wasn't moving from his kneeling position, his only action was continually smacking his fist against the ground, slowly pounding a larger and larger hole with each strike.
"Why, why, why. I used to be better than you. What happened!? I just wanted to save my sister, I just wanted to be something! Is that so wrong!?"
Seifer's pain surged around him once more, somehow burning and freezing at the same time. Sora could feel the waves of it pulsing around the room in angry electric shocks. Luckily, the golden shield was protecting him from the brunt of it. Even still, it nearly singed his fingers trying to reach closer, straight towards the source, but Sora tried anyway.
"Seifer, you can still save her. She really, really wants her brother back, I know that much. I don't think she really will be saved until she sees you again."
Taking a deep breath, Sora managed to put a hand on his shoulder, feeling the sharp pulse of the darkness even from there pricking him like needles. "What do you think your sister wants more? Justice in her name? Or just to have you home safe?"
There was a long silence as Seifer slowly grimaced at his attempt to reach out. Sora could feel the hum of the darkness increasing in volume, but kept his hand steady.
"You were always so competitive, but only ever with me. I don't get it. You said so yourself, I'm really not that great at a lot of stuff, so why do you keep trying to compare us all the time?"
No answer. He hadn't really expected one yet.
Riku suddenly spoke up, his voice slightly cold. "I can answer that for you. It's because you were an easy target. He sees you as the lowest denominator, and if he beats you, it makes him feel like he's somebody."
Another glare from Seifer, and the hatred bristling under Sora's fingers got much...pointier. He nearly recoiled his hand from the sharp pain, but caught himself just in time.
If that was true...
Maybe it really was like with Riku after all. All that dark stuff was latching onto his fear of being worthless. And just like how Riku had been going around beating up all those kids to try and establish himself to be the best, Seifer had been doing almost the same.
"You don't have to prove..." The words caught in his throat again. "I get that you wanted to do your sister proud. That's why you wore her pin this whole time. But you don't have to be strong to be worth something. I've met some really amazing people in my life. People who lost everything and suffered through the most horrible things yet despite all of that, decided that they weren't quite ready to give up. I doubt half of them could throw a decent punch and what does that matter?"
"If they had been stronger they wouldn't have lost everything in the first place! What else do you call someone who can't protect the ones they care most about? Worthless!" Furious and face still red, Seifer snapped up at him.
Even though there was nothing but unbridled rage and darkness pouring straight up into his face, Sora kept his expression still, his hand steady.
His voice without a trace of waver.
"What happened to Ellone wasn't your fault."
Seifer blinked up at him, unable to hold back all the water pooling in his eyes and he scowled, trying to wipe it away in time. Tipping his eyes to the side, Sora pretended not to see.
A dark roar stirred from the depths of the cave, and the various roots twisted around the rocks began to writhe in frustration. But even with the angry prompting, Seifer froze, seemingly unable to do its bidding.
"Shut up!" He snapped into the abyss as it continued roaring like a beast around them all. "I can't think with you shouting at me!"
Shouting? The only one shouting is...
Sora's thoughts trailed off, realizing that Seifer must be wrestling with that dark hollow voice he had heard in Riku's memory. It was such an awful commanding voice, one that had been trying to tempt Riku to do all sorts of horrid things. He could only imagine the sorts of temptations it had been feeding into his friend's ear.
"Seifer, don't listen to that thing. I know I can't understand everything that you're going through, but...believe me, I know how hard it is to feel like you have no purpose. Before I met Kairi and Riku, I really did feel like nothing myself. Every day was a lonely, cold reminder that I was alone. And with every scrap of food I had to steal, it was so hard not to feel like my existence was just causing everyone trouble. Every dirtied piece of ripped up, unwanted junk I salvaged from the trash felt like a reflection of who I was in the world."
Riku inhaled, clearly wanting to say something but chose to stay silent and let Sora finish.
"Everything changed for me when I found something to protect. Just like you, I wanted to be strong enough to save her from anything. I threw everything I had into it at the time, but she was still taken away from me. For years I wanted nothing more than to just see her again."
Seifer spat into the ground. "And lucky you it worked out."
"It wasn't luck. I refused to give up and just kept struggling until it did. But even with all the effort I put in, I wouldn't have gotten anywhere by myself. I'd have just been treading water until I drowned. I needed Riku by my side to help pull me out of the worst of it. That's where you're getting stuck, Seifer. You're fighting back so hard but you keep insisting on doing it all alone!"
"So what!? Not everyone is like you! You're such a bleeding heart that you celebrate when little brats wipe their snotty noses properly. Not everyone can be happy sharing victory with other people!"
Sora held his friend's shoulder steady, even as smoky waves of darkness began coiling their way up to his elbow, scratching at his skin like a frightened beast. "You might say it's cheating or weakness to help each other, but I don't think so. And I know that Ellone doesn't think that. Isn't her magic all about the connections that bind us all together? Those are strong, stronger than anything."
The darkness struggled to wrap its way around Sora's arm, but the magic of the feather was keeping it from getting a grip.
"I want to help you, Seifer. You're my friend. Can't we do this together? I know that you feel worthless right now but it's times like that you gotta be okay with asking for help. Friendship can push that pain away."
"No! I won't be a coward!"
"You're not! The darkness is the real coward, using your fears and pain to get stronger. It's trying to swallow everything that makes you you. It's only using you! And if you let it do that, you won't be able to protect your sister any more. "
"No! Just you watch! I'll do this all on my own, I've never needed anybody and your garbage about friendship is all wrong!"
"Maybe it is, but first I've got a question." Sora tried not to smile at the bug-eyed glare of shock on his friend's face after hearing such a casual retort.
"Earlier when you said you 'trashed' Fuu and Rai...where are they now?"
"Of all the stupid..."
Sora kept his eyes focused, silently pressing him to answer the question, as strange as a question it seemed. Already weak from the darkness, Seifer didn't resist for much longer and mumbled his answer out towards the ground.
"When they insisted on trying to stop me I...tied them up and left them in a spare room."
Relief transformed into a wide grin across his face and Sora couldn't help a slight laugh as well. It was what he had expected, but good news nonetheless that it hadn't been much worse. Seifer, however, seemed still perplexed by his reaction.
"You're crazy, you know that? How is that something to smile about!?"
Sora tightened his grip on his friends arm and shook his head, not letting his happy expression falter.
"Because it means I'm not going anywhere. It means you know how strong teamwork and friendship can be, no matter how much you try to hide it. You knew if your friends weren't held off they would do everything in their power to keep you safe."
"So what?"
"That means you know if we work together we can get you free from that thing. If you fight back against that pain, if you keep fighting even when its hard...there shouldn't ever be any doubt about exactly how strong you are. Not many can claim to have conquered their inner darkness. But you can. Fight back. Let us help you."
"Fight back..." Sora could feel him shaking slightly, and realized after a moment that he was laughing. "As much as I hate saying it...that is probably the least stupid thing you've ever said."
A sudden eruption of darkness bubbled out of his chest and he coughed, retching up globs of the stuff onto the sand. Panicked, Sora struggled to support his shoulders as his friend heaved painfully. It was like the seed was ripping him up from the inside out, struggling to either take control of his body or force him into its own bidding.
"H-hold on, don't give up! I'll see if I can-"
More spluttering laughter, and Seifer wiped roughly across his mouth. "Don't...flatter yourself. You're not my savoir or something." He grimaced, more darkness seeping from his chest. "I ain't going down so easy. I won't let it control me. Not any more."
Fingers raking across the sand, he gripped a tight fistful of the stuff and gritted his teeth. "I'm going to rip this bloated ugly weed out of me, roots and all! Then let anyone dare to say I'm weak!"
The horrid impostor that had taken over his friend's form was gone. All that was left was the true Seifer, as defiant and angry as ever.
The look in his eye reminded Sora almost of the first thaw of snow in the early spring, when tufts of grass were just visible under the ice. Still icy and cold, but full of the spark of promise of something new.
"You two." Seifer offered a rough tip of his head. "I'd rather Fuu and Rai were here to back me up, but you'll have to do. Just don't screw up."
Sora tried not to roll his eyes, and Riku visibly grimaced as he forced himself to swallow whatever retort he had playing in his head. Seifer did always like to...rewrite conversations to make himself look better. You could spend hours convincing him something, only for him to come out of it all insisting he always felt that way.
The cave suddenly seemed to hiccough, the ground rocking upwards so violently it dropped everyone off their feet. Above came the crashing thud of some other structure toppling over from the earthquake-like trembles.
Seifer winced, his voice came out as a low mumble. "It's really angry...maybe it's already too..." Angrily, Seifer snatched up his sword back from Sora's loose grip and pointed it into the depths of the cave. "Listen up! If this shaking gets any worse, leave me behind and get out of here while you still can."
"Nope! I'm not leaving until every single one of my friends is safe."
Frustration growing again, Seifer snarled, wiping an arm across his eyes to clear any more loose tears. "You don't get it! I heard what that thing wants! It said if I don't finish what I started and feed it your girl, it's going to rip this whole place apart. It's getting too dangerous here."
The rumbling in the cave grow stronger, a mournful wail bouncing across the walls.
Reconnect. Me.
Huh. Maybe Seifer had a point. Staying here with that...thing nearby didn't seem like the best idea.
"If we go, you're coming with us."
"Heh." The slyest smile peeked out on his face. "Maybe you forgot but part of it is still right inside here. Where I go, it goes. No place is safe with me in it. It's about to get worse, fast!"
"Then we just gotta get it out of you faster!" Sora said it like a joke, but he really did mean it.
Dark waves flowed out across the sand from his arm, coating their feet with something the same sticky consistency as sap. Whipping his head up, he paused, then gave Sora a strong nod.
"Fine." He stretched his arms out wide, calling out to the creature shrieking in the pits of the darkness. "You wanna dance, thing? Then let's dance! You're about to get shown the door, buddy!"
The darkness poured out from his arms and Seifer staggered, painfully, but refused to fall. Sora chanced a glance back over at Riku, wanting to see if they were at least on the same page.
His friend's stern expression was once again clear. That guy might be as pig-headed as they come, but he didn't deserve to get swamped and consumed by the tide facing him in the inner depths of the cave. They had to get that seed out of him.
The only problem was that once they did, that was likely to cause the monster to rampage even more.
One thing at a time, though.
Nodding, Sora smiled one more time and steeled himself to finally free his friend from the grips of that thing. Taking a step forward, he wrapped his hand around Seifer's outstretched forearm, startling his friend at the sudden touch.
"We're right here with you."
Riku sighed and laid his own hand on Seifer's other arm. "I know we don't really see eye-to-eye on a lot of things, but fighting against that darkness? That's personal. I'm not letting it drag you down, not when I can help."
Seifer's head drooped, but he managed a slight smirk anyway. "I hate you guys. I really do."
It was a Seifer sort of compliment. Biting, but it was pretty genuine.
Sora grinned. "Glad to hear it."
The faint breeze through the open windows carried with it the distant scent of flowers. So distant that it almost seemed like the fragrance was emanating instead from the wallpaper depicting whole bouquets of lilies bound in silk and lace.
She breathed it in, appreciating the resonating calmness that came with it. Normally she had disliked how pure white the walls were. It felt too sterile, like the slightest touch with her finger would disturb its purity. Of all the things, it made her feel dirty.
But for today at least, she was happy to see those walls.
It was like one last clean pure place to remind her without the least bit of subtlety that such places still existed in the world.
And that they were worth protecting.
She knew right at this moment two people very dear to her were fighting to bring their friend back from the grips of the darkness. There was no doubt in her mind that they would succeed. But what frightened her most was the realization of what must come after.
That there was likely only one way to calm the beast that would emerge from it all.
"I'm scared to say it out loud, I think..." Kairi paused, letting the weight of her words linger on her lips. Her eyes flickered ever briefly up to meet those of her cousin.
Namine also seemed shy to maintain eye contact, and tipped her own eyes down to her sketch papers. Empty sketch papers.
Her cousin, as graceful as ever, traced her finger in a circle across the blank page. "Is it...guilt? Because you know what it will mean for them as well?"
Kairi nodded.
"I see."
Once more, she breathed in the scent of the flowers. It was hard to place what sort they were. Not that it mattered.
Kairi could hear the cicadas once more in the silence, chirping just as strongly as at the height of summer. Their ever determined cry all the more clear.
We are alive. The end may come soon, but for now, we are alive.
She wasn't sure if Namine could hear them.
"While I understand that it might feel like you are deciding their fates for them...but Sora at least has said so many times over what it is that he wants. He wants to be with you. No matter what stands in his way. You can probably trust he is telling the truth."
"I know...I know that's what his heart has already decided, but..." Kairi clenched her hands around the edge of her skirt. "It hurts. Knowing this is the way it all..."
Namine stopped tracing her circles and lifted her eyes back up over the top of the page. "It might not be. After all, the fact that we are both here now, talking, proves that there is something magical at play. The three of you have such a strong bond...things like that don't just disappear so easily."
"Maybe." The room was so white. Glaringly white. Her eyes began to tear up. "But if we do...please watch over everything else for me. I am so sorry to give you such a burden, but I don't know who else I could trust."
The tears caused her vision lose focus. Her cousin's face swayed like a mirage across the table. The room seemed to melt and shift, the wallpaper being slowly replaced with ragged rocks and vines. Their connection was fading. As ephemeral as it was, it had been so wonderful to see her cousin again. One last time.
"Kairi, I believe in you. I believe in all three of you. And I am here to support you however I can. No matter what."
It was a comfort to hear.
But as Kairi began to wake up, the dream, if it really had been a dream, lost its hold on her completely.
As every semblance of Namine faded away, Kairi gasped awake. She was left staring at the mess of darkness swamping the floor and walls of the cave ahead of her. Sora and Riku were there, their friend Seifer between them. All of them panting for air, struggling to shuffle off the gobs still sticking to them.
Renewed energy surged through her, thanks to what her cousin had gifted her. Eyes blinking wide open now, Kairi struggled up to her feet. Sleepiness still coursed through her body, but she pushed herself one step at a time over to the exhausted trio. Sora noticed her out of the corner of his eye and immediately brightened, every trace of weariness fading from his face.
Despite the heaviness in her heart, he still made her smile.
Always so sweet.
But he didn't understand yet.
The cave was churning, rumbling from the insatiable hunger of the dark beast that yearned to consume her light. Whole rocks were tumbling down from the ceiling. Now that the dark seed had been torn out from Seifer's control, the vines were whipping about unrestrained. When the rumbling finally, briefly quieted, she let her breath out all at once, not even realizing she had been holding it in.
The earthquakes would continue, she was sure of it, until that beast was satisfied. They would only grow worse as each moment passed. The periods of silence shrinking until it was nothing but a constant scream. She turned her eyes sorrowfully over to Sora and knelt down next to him. The roar of the darkness seemed to be looming ever closer.
"It can't go on like this any more..."
Kairi drooped, her head slumping against the arm that quickly shot out to support her.
"It's okay, it's all over now. Seifer is gonna be alright, so let's all get out of here together."
His hand was so warm on her shoulder. She closed her eyes and felt it, just felt it. Living those few seconds as long as she possibly could. She dreaded what her next words would bring.
"I can't go."
"Huh? Why?"
"It will only keep hurting everyone. If I run, it will only chase after and continue this horrible cycle over and over again."
She felt his fingers gripping her tighter. "Don't say that! You can't give up now! We've already come this far together. I told you before, remember? I'm with you through this no matter what, so don't worry! We will stop it! I promise!"
Of course she knew he felt that way. She could never forget it. That's why it hurt so much to tell him. Undaunted, he continued smiling down at her, trying to liven her spirits, not understanding the half of it.
"Let's think of a plan together! Riku is amazing at planning stuff, even if I don't listen half the time, but I'm sure he can think of-"
"Please listen. It's not that easy." She reached up to meet his hand with her own, gently stroking her thumb against the back of it. He relaxed slightly at her touch, and she tried to smile back, but she knew it wasn't convincing. "The only thing that can calm it is inside of me. The heart of this world has been ripped in half and until it is fixed no one can really be at peace. "
Sora still seemed confused, his head tipping slightly to the side. Glancing over to Riku, she knew he understood at least. He was turned away from her; exceptionally quiet. And while she couldn't see his face, just by the slumping of his shoulders she knew exactly what sort of expression he was making towards the sand.
"I have to give it back. I have to...reconnect the pieces. I'm going to let it..."
A horrified expression filled Sora's face as it all so suddenly dawned on him. He clutched at her shoulders with both hands, his eyes wild and terrified. "Y-you can't! If you go down there, that thing is going to..."
"I know."
"There has to be another way!" He squeezed his arms around her, pressing her against his chest and she could feel his heart thumping, working itself up into a frenzy. "We can figure it out together! We have time! There's gotta be another..."
"Sora..."
She tried to pull away from his tight embrace, but he refused to let her go, shaking his head so rapidly it shook her with it. His whole body began to tremble. Not even trying to hide it from her, she felt his tears raining down onto the exposed skin at the nape of her neck. They were warm. And sad.
Every spark of brightness in his soul had been doused in an instant. The thought of causing him so much pain made the heaviness in her heart and the clenching tension in her throat only that much worse. Leaning back just enough, she tipped her face upwards so she could look him right in the eyes.
He deserved that much.
"You wanted me to be able to choose. You wanted me to have the freedom to decide my own destiny." Her gaze fell in the direction of the mess of a monster writhing unseen in the nearby darkness that was still calling out to her. "This is what I have to do. For everyone. For all of those who will come after. I may not be the one who made the mistake in the past, but I have the ability to fix it. I can't turn away from that."
"But if you do that...if you...i-if..." It was all he could do, repeating himself over and over. While his words struggled to accept it, she could tell from the look in his eyes that his heart already understood there was nothing he could say. His heart's sorrowful cry was so palpable she could barely breathe from feeling the pain squeeze her inside.
And she let him hug her again without the slightest resistance.
She couldn't be sure how long exactly they were locked in that embrace, but she knew it wasn't nearly long enough. The cave rumbled again, forcing both of them apart. Every single earthquake now really was longer, more intense than the last. They were running out of time.
Freeing Seifer had set forth a ticking bomb, and only she had the means to stop it. Kairi reached desperately over towards Sora's hand, using him to help steady her through the tremors. The two of them struggled up to their feet together, not wanting their hands to ever separate again as long as they could manage.
He wiped at his eyes, but it did nothing to clear his face. Seifer stumbled up to his feet, his face pale from overexertion. The knight glanced back and forth between Sora and Kairi, his expression steadily souring before he shoved Sora hard in the shoulder.
"Stop one damn minute and listen to yourselves! Where the hell did all of this come from? What happened to all the crap from before about never giving up!? I guess none of that matters now and you're just gonna stand there and cry like a baby!? What about how much you said you cared about her!?"
"I know, but-"
"'But' nothing!" Seifer spun his attention on her, his eyes flashing dangerously. "And you! You fight me tooth and nail and now you're happy to just give up and die!? What the hell was the point!?"
Kairi trembled under the rage directed at her, but didn't have to think twice on her answer. "I don't want to die! Of course I don't! But...I also understand. I can save everyone. Everyone I love. Even if it costs my own life that is something I am willing to do. The point is that I am able to make that choice on my own!"
Scoffing, Seifer threw his hands in the air. "Man I almost bought your little love story but that is one hell of a way to show your gratitude for all he's gone through to keep you alive. Just so you can go suicide yourself into-"
"Watch it." Riku practically snarled as he shoved himself in the way to shield her from the barrage of interrogation.
"She's insane, you know that? Women! Every single one of them way too stubborn for their own good, I swear."
Riku wrenched his arm backwards with another, terser threat. "Enough. Besides, you're one to talk about being too stubborn."
Seifer scowled and opened his mouth to retort, but nothing came of it. His face also still looked slightly nauseous, and it was clear he had just used far more energy than he actually had in his angry tirade. The rage subsided, and his expression mellowed.
"It makes no god damn sense. I thought if I fought back...fought back and won, that everything would...that everything would be alright. But she's just gonna go die anyway!?"
Riku released the other knight's elbow and placed a far more gentle hand on her shoulder.
"The destination may be the same. After all, death comes to us all one way or another. But the path she has chosen is one not yolked by force. She walks each step following her own heart and that makes all the difference. Maybe not at the end, but in the now. She has chosen her path and...while it's one I wish I could change...I know I can't stop her."
Unable to control his shaking still, Sora's breath was coming out only in unsteady rattles. He seemed barely able to think, let alone speak.
"T-that path is...the path you're choosing to..."
While his eyes had always been so earnest and bright, they were now so clouded with tears that every single ray of his cheerful sunlight was cast into shadow. Her ever boundless optimist was struggling in a way she had never seen before. He tore his gaze from her face as if he was ashamed, his body trembling even more.
When he finally spoke, his unsteady voice betrayed his overwhelming fear.
"...I don't want you to go."
His spare hand brushed gently through her hair, wrapping fistfuls of it around his fingers as if terrified she would be pulled away from him.
"Please. I'll do anything."
She closed her eyes. While she had steeled herself to not cry, seeing his dejected and sorrowful face begging her, pleading with her, broke her instantly. Kairi crumbled into him, feeling his tunic soaking up her tears.
"I'm so sorry."
When she finally felt her throat unclench enough to speak, she could feel his body freeze underneath her. He was dreading her words just as much as he wanted to hear them, she was sure.
"Sora...because of you I am here. Right here, able to make this choice. You've fulfilled every promise you ever made to my mother and to me. You've kept me safe. You've made me happier than I could have ever hoped for. So it's alright now." She felt him shiver and all at once wrap her up in his arms so tightly it was like she was the last source of heat in the world.
It was warm and stuffy, but she loved it. She loved it for as long as she was able.
"The last thing you can do for me, Sora...is let me go."
His trembling stopped. Body frozen, he let everything he was holding back pour out all at once.
"Y...you tell me that, but all I ever wanted was to be by your side and spend every day together! I wanted to have days where we went exploring every corner of town. Days getting caught by an unexpected rainstorm and rushing for shelter. Days doubling over laughing so hard about something that by the time we are done we forgot what was so funny in the first place! Days where we are so bored we can't stand it! I even wanted days when we don't get along and snip and snap at each other until we calm down enough to talk it out! I want all of them because I want to make so many more memories with you! I can't do that if you're gone!"
He didn't stop until he was nearly sobbing, out of breath. Not wanting to interrupt him, she wrapped her arms around his middle and snuggled deeper against his chest. His heart pounded in her ear, echoing even more thoughts and feelings his voice couldn't convey. And she listened.
"I wish I could give you a smile like always and say I understand, but I can't just bury my feelings and pretend it's all okay. I'm scared. I don't want you to do this. I'd take your place in a heartbeat if it were even possible. But...even then...I know even if we had all the time in the world, it still wouldn't feel like enough for me..."
He laughed, almost. It was more like a sharp exhale.
"I guess that makes me selfish and greedy, huh? Because even the shortest of time spent together can be just as meaningful, just as wonderful as the long times. I know that. I love every second I have with you. I can't fairly say I need more time, I just...want it. Even just one more day..."
She felt his breath hot against the top of her head as he pressed into her hair.
"E-even though I feel this way and even though it hurts...I won't stop you, Kairi. I can't. Because Riku is right. You deserve to follow your heart wherever it goes, and I don't have any right to stand in your way. I don't ever wanna be the sort of person who tells you what you can or can't do. If this is what you are sure you need to do...I'll let you go."
Kairi half wondered if he could feel her tears pouring out from her unrestrained. He certainly could hear her sniffling, even as muffled as it must be under his arms.
"You're gonna what!?" A large boulder sized rock tumbled down from above and Seifer stumbled to the side, cursing. "You've gotta be kidding me!"
The cave was going to collapse in on itself any moment now. Larger and larger rocks were breaking loose and thumping dangerously close to them all.
If only time could stop here. It really was just like he had said.
Even just one more day...one more minute...
Kairi felt the warmth of him against her face. She took a deep breath.
And she pushed herself away.
"Go. While there is still time. I may have decided on my fate, but I won't force you to walk that path with me."
She may have tried to shove him away, but he closed the gap between the two of them immediately, gently resting his hand on the side of her arm. And she finally saw the smallest glimpse of his smile once more.
She knew what he was about to say.
"I said I'd let you go. Not that I'd let you go alone."
She knew it. She was a bit melancholy to realize that maybe she finally had gotten him figured out. It also made his previous distress all the more relatable.
Kairi didn't want him walking down this road any more than he wanted her to go. Guilt filled the back of her throat, knowing that he was only volunteering because of her.
"There's no reason for you to! Maybe it's foolish of me to even try to argue, but if I go by myself I can at least be happy knowing that you're sammnh-"
She wasn't expecting his hand on the side of her face, fingers entwining through her hair. She wasn't expecting how quickly he could close the space between them.
She wasn't expecting a kiss at all. Least of all one so passionate and abrupt she couldn't even breathe.
His lips tugged on hers, drawing out of her a single gasping sigh in place of whatever words of protest she had planned. Everything became nothing but a dizzy hum in her mind. The unrestrained urgency with which he tasted her made her flush.
It was almost like he was trying to commit the flavor to his memory forever.
Even if she hadn't been looking, she would have known it was him. The kiss was everything like him. Gentle and kind yet as energetic as leaves dancing on a light breeze.
She felt warm. Her stomach clenched. How he always manged to leave her feeling so delightfully twisted up inside she couldn't understand.
But just as abruptly as it had began, he parted, leaving her panting, mouth soaked. And when she realized that the others had been watching, was a touch shy.
Sora gave her a bright smile. No doubt his own confident look a result of how utterly dizzy and speechless he had rendered her.
"You are my light, Kairi. You kept asking me before how I can stay so hopeful and positive all the time and it's because of you. Maybe it is stupid of me not to run from here, but I can't. I love you too much."
She held herself together, only barely. Kairi didn't want to cry any more. Not even tears of joy. She wanted him to remember her looking happy.
His eyes lit up when he saw her face. Lowering his voice so only she could hear, he gave her a cheeky tap on the nose with his thumb. "I'd kiss you again, but then I can't see that smile."
If only that was the worst of their problems.
"If you two are just about done, may I remind you that we are in imminent danger here!?" Seifer gestured backwards to the flailing vines starting to kick up again in another fit and rolled his eyes. "Idiots..."
Unable to see the humor in the situation, the ground bucked upwards and a vicious roar accompanied it. This earthquake was worse than all the others, knocking everyone to the sand. Two massive boulders crashed down nearby, spraying dirt and small pebbles over them.
Riku was the first to his feet and hastily reached down to help Sora and Kairi up. Sora glanced uncertainly between his friend and the monster of darkness bellowing in the distance.
"I...Riku, I'm going to go with her."
"I know."
"Are you-"
Riku bonked him soundly on the head. "Do you really have to ask? I can't help you two being hopeless, but I made a promise too. I've told you countless times, you thick-head, I'm with you no matter what. Wouldn't be the same without you around."
Just as she feared, the two of them really were going to stand by her side until the end. It had been her fear, but if she was being completely honest with herself, she was secretly relieved she wouldn't have to face such a thing alone.
Maybe that made her a bit selfish and greedy, too.
A sudden voice chimed in from the corner, one belonging to someone Kairi had almost forgotten was present.
"It's an interesting twist to be sure. Though perhaps one that will make all of this not simply an exercise in futility."
Riku scowled in her direction, looking particularly fierce. "You're still here? Haven't you meddled enough?"
"Not quite." Swinging her staff to the left, it glowed briefly in emerald fire before three long cylindrical objects swiftly appeared from the ether and buried themselves in the sand just next to where Riku was standing.
They were...swords?
"If you brave knights are determined to lead your princess into the darkness, you'll need to make sure she reaches the core of the beast. On the way, many a wayward dark fledgling may try to strike her down. Should you fail to defend her against them, and she falls too soon, there isn't any guarantee the two halves will rejoin properly. The darkness might simply consume the light. And all will be for naught."
Riku eyed the swords skeptically. "And you expect us to believe that those weapons are actually meant to help?"
"Well you don't have to use them. I certainly would. Maybe the darkness will just...melt away if you glare at it hard enough." She chuckled into the back of her hand.
Sora eyed the swords, gave Kairi's hand the tiniest squeeze, and turned to the witch in the corner. "I still don't really get you, not one bit. But...you said if we want to fix the heart of the world...we need to get to the core, right? The very center? All the way at the very end of that tunnel?"
Maleficent nodded. Observing him. Sora stared back just as intently.
There was a tense moment of silence between the two. Kairi wasn't sure if there was some battle of wills going on, or if Maleficent was somehow telepathically arguing with him, but either way they seemed to be having some sort of silent debate.
The swords were glowing with a strange blue hue, almost as if they were a pale luminescent metal made of moonlight. With the slightest hesitation, Sora reached out with his free hand towards the sword closest to him.
"Wait, it might be a tra-" Seifer hissed in objection, but it came too late.
Sora pried it loose from the sand. Giving it a few test swings, he noticed nothing adverse seemed to be happening, and shrugged.
"Look, I don't exactly trust her, but...I think she's telling the truth about this, at least. If I can use this to keep Kairi safe until she gets to where she needs to go, then I don't care where it came from. It could even be a rusty pan lid. I'd fight with anything."
Riku exhaled slowly, and gripped the second sword with equal trepidation. "Right. That's our duty as knights, after all. Defend her until the last."
The beast roared again, shaking the cave and the ceiling showered them all with yet another layer of dust. Kairi trembled at the monstrous wailing sound and tried to quiet the rapid beating of her own heart.
If there was danger down that path, there was a chance they would fail before even getting to the center. And not only would they die, the darkness would consume everything.
No.
Not with them by her side.
The two of them were capable of the most impossible of miracles. She had seen it time and time again.
She trusted them with not only her body but her heart.
Kairi remembered the conviction in Namine's voice earlier.
The three of you have such a strong bond...things like that don't just disappear so easily.
Yes. Maybe, just maybe, fate would be kind to them. She certainly hoped so.
A/N: I struggled with more than a few decisions in this chapter.
I know some things maybe were not explained fully, and I apologize if that causes some confusion. Some events I think the characters themselves don't fully understand, so it wouldn't make sense to interject with long explanations. Other things I hope make sense if readers were following the conclusions and clues given in previous chapters.
Next chapter will be out shortly, check back in a week or so. I'm on a mini vacation now so I have time to finish up everything, and I hate leaving things on a cliffhanger.
-A. Moth