If someone had told Remus Lupin that he would be in this situation not even a month ago, he would have quietly removed himself from the conversation and ask about that someone's current state of mind.

It wasn't enough that James and Lily were dead-murdered cruelly. That little Harry was gone 'somewhere safe' and Dumbledore would not tell him. That Sirius is in Azkaban because he sold them out to He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, fuck.

No, none of these things were enough. He had to get a call from his cousin about it-About Sirius and his child, fuck, that's right, Sirius has a child. Is that why he betrayed them to Voldemort? To protect them? He could have seeked help from The Order, they would have done everything they could have-

"Sirius is innocent you fucking toerag." Lily's influence on her can't be mistaken, "How dare you believe he was anything other than loyal?"

The words stung him. Broke his bones, really. Left his throat dry and his lungs devoid of air. But his mind refused to wrap around the idea: the idea that he didn't advocate for his friend. That he left him to rot in Azkaban at the word of Dumbledore.

"He didn't even get a trial."

He didn't even get a trial. Their beloved Minister (a sodding coward, Lily called him) wanting to look competent. Wanting to have people's trust by locking up as many Death Eaters as he can-Remus scoffs, because so many had gone free with trials. Malfoy and Goyle and…

He swallows an uncomfortable lump in his throat as he thinks about Snape.

It comes right back once he spots his cousin approaching him, a toddler in her arms-Oh G-d, is that..?

He stands, wobbly because he hasn't eaten in who knows how long, and he really should order more than water at this café, but he's out of money and out of luck and out of friends and out of-

"Good fuck." His cousin addresses him, "Close your mouth, Remus, flies will lay eggs in it."

"Fuck." Says the little one, "Fuck!"

"Oh shit, look what you did-" She pinches the toddler's cheeks (softly, she's always been delicate), "No, Chaya, honey, don't use that word, your witch of a grandmother will have my head."

"Gammy?" There's no fear in the eyes of the child, thank goodness.

"Yes, Chaya, your gammy."

Lupin can't help but chuckle at the thought of seeing someone as towering and intimidating as Walburga Black being called gammy. He hopes she'll start using bobe soon.

"It's good to see you, Rachel." It is. He feels lighter already, it's been so long since they went into hiding. He wonders, does the child remember him? Surely she's been named by now, "And this is…?"

She adjusts her hold on the girl, lifting her chin up with familiar satisfaction, "This is my pride and joy. The scourge of Black family ancestors. The fruit of my half-hour excursion with Sirius, and a resulting forty-eight hour labor." The toddler begins to stick her fingers in her mouth, "Ursala Rebekah Black."

"Hi." Ursala's words come out mumbled through her fingers.

Remus feels a flourish of love for her.

"What a mouthful."

"Yeah, it's catchy, right?"

Ursala begins to tell Remus what her name means, but she talks so fast, all he can make out are 'noosethebear', which is concerning, but he only smiles and goes along with it, "You've grown so much." It feels like centuries since he's seen his little niece (well, the term is probably closer to third cousin once removed, but-) "Rachel, you've cut your hair."

"Out of rebellion." Yes, that's the reasoning behind most of her actions, "Purebloods all have a hard-on for long hair, thought I'd mix it up by wearing my mudblood badge proudly." That's true. Short hair is still a bit of a taboo amongst young witches in pureblooded circles, "Did you order?"

He pulls out a seat for her to sit down before returning to his own, "No, I'm not hungry."

"The fuck you are, I'm getting you lunch, don't argue with me."

"Fuck!" Ursala agrees.

And really, how can Remus argue with that?