(2/10/2018)
CHAPTER 46
Jack and Shane sat on the deck watching the two women laughing in the kitchen.
"What do you think they're laughing about?"
"Something to do with us, probably" Shane said, shaking his head at them.
"They're close?"
"Yeah. Well they've always had our deployments in common so I think that gives them common ground to start with."
"We've always deployed together?"
"I transferred here about ten years ago. I was immediately put in your unit. I missed your first deployment but I was there for the second. That was a tough one though."
"Why?"
Six years and nine months before … (November 2011)
Two weeks after Elizabeth asked Jack to meet her at the tree with Halley, Jack got some unexpected news.
Three units had been called to the meeting room for a briefing. Jack was sitting beside Shane when everyone was handed their letters. There were a few groans as people began opening their letters before the others.
They were all being sent on another deployment to the middle east in just two weeks time … for six months duration. Shane and Katy's daughter was six months old at the time so Shane was feeling upset but was surprised when Jack slammed the letter on the table in front of him and swore. Shane glanced over at him and could see how angry he was.
"Jack, you okay?"
"No" he exhaled slowly before continuing. "Elizabeth's pregnant. Almost three months."
"Oh no" Shane said as he realised the time frame. "I mean that's great but the timing …"
Jack would miss the whole pregnancy and be lucky to make it back for the birth.
"I know what you meant" Jack gave him a small smile. "I missed the first three months with Halley and now I'm going to miss the rest of it with this baby."
"Yeah, but you won't miss all of it. You might still make it back in time."
"I doubt it. Halley was three weeks early."
Shane nodded, he couldn't deny that one.
"How am I going to tell her? She's so excited and now I'm going to have to say 'sorry you're on your own, babe'."
"She will be upset, but not with you."
"I'm not so sure."
Jack knew Shane was right in a way but if Elizabeth couldn't blame the military, he was next in line.
"So that's it then? We left two weeks later?"
"Yeah. I missed Sophie's first Christmas and you missed Halley's second. We got to Skype a lot, but it was probably the hardest deployment for you."
"Even compared to the last one?"
"I think its harder when your children age so much in that time. Sophie was six months when I left and one when I returned. I missed her learning to crawl, her first word and her first birthday. That's a lot of firsts. Phillip was only just two this time, so I lost a lot with him too. He didn't even recognise me when I first came home. He's fine now, but it took a good week for him to get used to me again."
"I didn't think of it like that."
"Halley was the same with you when you got back that time. At least I had some forewarning that Phillip would be like that because I saw Halley with you. It broke your heart that she wouldn't go to you, even though she saw you on the screen when Elizabeth would Skype."
"Our wives are very strong women, aren't they?"
"All military wives are. They do a lot on their own."
That night, when the girls were in bed, Jack and Elizabeth sat downstairs on the lounge. With his arm around her shoulders, Jack told her about his conversation with Shane that afternoon.
"That was an incredibly hard time for both of us. It was the hardest deployment for me" Elizabeth said.
"What happened when you found out?"
Elizabeth laughed. "It's funny now. At the time, not so much."
On his way home from the base, Jack bought some flowers and some choc chip cookie dough ice-cream. Armed with gifts, he stepped into the house. It was quiet, so Halley must have already been in bed.
He put the flowers down and the ice-cream in the freezer before he went in search of Elizabeth. He found her immersed in a bubble bath with her eyes closed.
"Hi sweetie. What are you doing?"
"I had a rough day. I needed to relax."
Jack inwardly groaned at her assessment of her day. "How is that going?"
"Better now that you're here."
Elizabeth pulled herself up out of the bath. Jack looked her up and down. He could already see her small belly taking on a different shape. She held out her hand to him to help her but instead of doing that, he scooped up her wet body directly from the bath.
She squealed in surprise as he carried her back to their bed, while still dripping wet.
"What are you doing?"
"Making your day better."
Elizabeth giggled. "Aren't you hungry?"
"Oh yes" Jack said as he hovered over her, kissing her deeply and nibbling her bottom lip before he pulled back to yank his clothes off. He loved her with all the passion and desire he could muster, the idea of being apart from her for six months encouraging him on.
They lay there afterwards, wrapped together, their hearts beating rapidly and his legs entwined with hers. His arms surrounded her, holding her close and tight to his chest, not wanting to let go. He was going to miss all of this. Six months!
"What's wrong, Jack?"
"Nothing."
"What you just did to me was not inspired by nothing. I'm not complaining. That was … amazing but I know something is up."
"I got my papers today" he said, his hands tightening further.
"How long?"
"Six months" Jack whispered and at first he didn't notice any change, until he felt the soft shaking of her shoulders.
"I'm sorry" he said gently, rubbing his hands over her back, trying to soothe her.
She didn't say anything for a long time. "When?" she managed to say.
"Two weeks."
That was all they said for the rest of the night.
"I'm so sorry" Jack said again, as if it had just happened.
"Jack, it's in the past. It wasn't your fault. It was your job."
"How much did I miss in those six months?"
"A lot. Even though you missed the pregnancy, I gave you updates on Skype and you saw me every week or two so that wasn't too bad. It was Halley that you missed out on the most though."
"Shane mentioned that."
"Yeah, it was hard. Often she was asleep when you called or would start crying if I put the phone in front of her. She missed you a lot at first and would keep asking for you but then one day she stopped and that was the saddest day for me. She didn't think you were coming back. Even though I talked about you a lot, she didn't understand."
Jack nodded slowly.
The morning after Jack got his papers, it was a Saturday and with the prospect of his deployment approaching, Jack was determined not to miss all of Christmas. They went to the mall in the morning, heading straight for the toy section. While Halley slept, Jack and Elizabeth decided on her presents together and went home and wrapped them. It was still six weeks until Christmas but at least that way, Jack felt like he was a part of it.
Over the next two weeks, Elizabeth tried to get organised for Jack's leave. She was still going to work two days a week while he was gone. Halley loved going to childcare. All of the carers were lovely and she was very attached to one in particular, so Elizabeth didn't feel selfish for wanting to continue working.
On one of her days off, she went and bought Jack's Christmas present. She had been debating for a long time what to get him. She needed it to be small so he could carry it with him. After debating all week, she had finally thought of a great idea. Over the next few days, while Jack was at work, she made Jack's present, wrapped it up and set it beside his duffel bag.
The day before Jack left, they had a constant stream of visitors coming to say goodbye. Charlotte and Tom, William and Grace, Lee and Rosie all dropped in to give Jack a hug and wish him well. That night, Elizabeth avoided the obvious. She cooked Jack a roast dinner with all the trimmings. They sat together eating, all their conversations avoiding the elephant in the room. After dinner they sat on the lounge together watching some show on the television, although neither of them were paying attention.
Elizabeth was leaning into Jack's shoulder, his arm around her. As they sat there in silence, Jack's mind wandered to the baby that would likely be born without him being in the country. His free hand drifted to her belly. He heard her take a deep breath as he touched her and just like that, the flood gates opened. Elizabeth had held it together all day and with one small move, her resolve was gone.
"Beth, I'm sorry" he said as he held her tightly.
She was now sobbing against him.
"Come on. Let's go to bed."
He turned the television off and helped Elizabeth to her feet. He held her hand as they walked into their room. Her sobbing had slowed with the distraction.
"I don't know that I can do this tomorrow" she said through the tears.
"I know, but you have to. Katy will be there too. You will both be okay if you stick together."
They got ready for bed and slid under the covers. Jack reached up to turn the lamp off. The room was plunged into darkness and was silent. Jack's arms reached out for Elizabeth and when he found her smooth skin, he took his time running his hands over her, trying to commit everything to memory. Her hands were doing the same thing. The tears were gone for the moment, as they made the most of the time they had left together.
As they lay there, wrapped in each others embrace, Elizabeth remained awake with her head on Jack's chest. She listened to his heartbeat, all the while praying that she would hear it again in six months time when her husband returned safe and sound.
The next day, Elizabeth got Halley ready and put her in the car while she waited for Jack. They drove in silence, her hand in his the entire way to the base. She got out and was about to put Halley in the pram when Jack took her instead. With his duffel over one shoulder and his daughter in his other arm they walked toward the hangar. He went and placed his bag with all of the others before coming back to Elizabeth. They waited there for another ten minutes before they were joined by Shane and Katy. They talked together for a few minutes before they were given their five minute warning for departure.
Jack turned to Elizabeth, his free arm wrapping around her, and with Halley between them they hugged each other for a minute. Elizabeth took her off him and placed her in the pram before they said their final goodbye. She wrapped her arms around his neck.
"I love you. Take care of yourself" he said.
All Elizabeth could do was nod and whisper "I love you too. Be safe."
Jack kissed her slowly for the last time before he pulled away and joined the ranks with all of the other officers. There were tears everywhere. Distraught women, a few teary men and some children crying as well.
Katy stepped closer to Elizabeth, their shoulders touching, as their husbands marched away to board the plane. They stood there until the last soldier disappeared from view. In silence, they walked back toward the carpark, their prams in front of them. They gave each other a hug, both of them still emotional, before they went their separate ways, promising to check up on one another later.
The first day was hard. The second day was not as hard. And so it continued, each day slightly easier than the last with the prospect that they would be apart for one less day.
"I remembered that deployment. Halley was wearing a navy blue dress."
"Yes, that's right."
"And you wore a grey dress with black tights and boots."
"Yeah."
"I remembered saying goodbye. That was hard."
"It was."
"But I came home."
Elizabeth nodded.
Elizabeth heard from Jack for the first time, just three days after he left. They had arrived at their destination and he was able to Skype her to let her know they had made it. He had already been sent on one patrol to get his bearings and was already over the sand and dust.
"I swear after just one day its everywhere and in everything. Even the food tastes like it has sand as a main ingredient" he said with a grin.
"Oh no. I hope you're exaggerating a lot."
"Unfortunately no. How's Halley?"
"Good. She just went to sleep. I would wake her back up but it just took me an hour to get her to settle and stop climbing out of the cot."
"No, I understand. Can you send me some more videos of her? I got the one from yesterday."
"Ok. I will do that tomorrow."
"Alright, I have to go. I love you babe. I love you baby, as well."
He could see Elizabeth smiling back at him. "I love you too. Be safe."
By the time Christmas came around, it had been two weeks since they had spoken. There had been no calls or emails.
On Christmas day, Elizabeth set up the video recorder in the corner of the room and filmed Halley seeing her presents and opening them, with a lot of help from Elizabeth. Still too young to understand, Halley was more excited about ripping the Christmas paper than playing with her presents, but Elizabeth was glad that Jack could see it.
There were two more presents under the tree. One with her name on it and the other with 'Baby' on it, both in Jack's handwriting. Elizabeth left them there, hoping that Jack would get the chance to Skype later. Elizabeth went to Viola's for Christmas lunch with her family and although they had a lovely day, Jack was constantly on her mind.
She called Katy on the way home. She too had heard nothing, which put both of their minds at ease in a way.
Elizabeth went to sleep that night thinking about Jack. In the middle of the night, she was woken up by her phone ringing. When she saw who it was, she hurriedly answered the videocall.
"Jack?"
"Hi babe. Merry Christmas."
"Finally. I was beginning to worry."'
"I know. I'm sorry. We just got back into camp. Everyone has been frantically trying to call home. Can you turn the light on? I want to see you."
"I probably look terrible. I was asleep."
"I know, but I couldn't wait any longer."
Elizabeth got up and turned the light on. "I'll just go grab the presents, hang on."
She hurried downstairs to grab the two remaining presents and returned to the bed. She propped the phone up against the pillow.
"Have you opened yours yet?"
"No. It's here."
He held up the small package in his hands.
"Ok you open yours first!" she said excitedly.
"Oh no. You first. Go!"
Elizabeth unwrapped hers first and found some new sheepskin boots, a rose gold watch and a homemade CD.
"That's our greatest hits."
Elizabeth grinned at him. "I can't wait to listen to it. Thank you."
"And have a look at the watch."
Elizabeth turned it over. 'Love is patient' was engraved on the back with both of their initials.
"Jack it's beautiful."
"Baby's turn now!"
Elizabeth bit her lip with excitement as she pulled open the wrapping paper on their baby's first gift. Inside was a beautiful white, soft rabbit.
"Oh Jack. It's perfect" she said as she ran her hand over the fur.
"My turn now" he said excitedly.
"Just bear in mind I had a size, weight and value restriction on your gift."
"Believe me, I know."
Jack tore off the wrapping to find a small book. As he opened it, he stared at the pictures in front of him.
"Oh Beth, its perfect."
"Really?"
"Yeah."
The book had photos in it that ranged from when they met all the way through to the week before he left. As he flicked further along, a lot of the photos were ones that he had never seen before. On the last few pages were photos of Halley holding up signs.
"WE", "MISS, "YOU", "BE SAFE" were held up by Halley on different days.
On the last page was a photo of Elizabeth and Halley. Elizabeth was holding a photo of the ultrasound scan and Halley was bent over pointing at it while Elizabeth was laughing at her.
"Elizabeth. Thank you" he said, his voice breaking with the emotion. Seeing his girls again, even if it was just in a photo, made him more homesick.
"I'm sorry if it's made it worse, I …"
"No. Don't apologise. I love it. Thank you."
They talked for a few minutes about Halley before their conversation had to be wrapped up. With the promise of talking again as soon as possible, they took one more long look at each other before they had to hang up.
"It all sounded very intense."
"It was. You're constantly waiting for those phone calls and you literally drop everything to talk. If I accidentally left my phone at home, I thought I was going to have an anxiety attack until I had it back in my hand. It felt like my lifeline to you. It's a horrible feeling from this end, and just as horrible for you at the other end. Just different, I would imagine."
"Thank you for telling me and thank you for being so patient with me" Jack said, kissing her forehead.
"Your welcome" Elizabeth replied, as she snuggled closer into him.