Another Auld Lang Syne

by Castlefan6

Authors Note: Based loosely on the song Same Auld Lang Syne by Dan Fogelberg and incorporates scenes from Food to Die For. Beckett meets Brent Edwards at her HS Reunion, delaying Caskett if not derailing it completely. Also, we may take liberties with the events and timeline from Canon and use events to make this a more believable fiction, Warning THIS IS AU, with only brief flashes of Canon.

I don't own Castle; I use the characters for amusement purposes only, except the ones I create.

Previously

Rick's hands were trembling when he finished the letter, even though it was old news and he had heard that Kate was once again a Beckett, he didn't want to know any of the details. She must have been destroyed by this, round two of the deceit of her two best friends, this time they couldn't plead it was a high school event and we were kids. They both were adults and knew the hurt they were causing but did it anyway.

He had heard of Maddie only once since she left, apparently, Brent wasn't capable of being true to anyone and they lasted less than 3 months. She appeared on a national TV Show looking for romance, although she hadn't won, had enough offers to sort through from others. Where she was or who she was with didn't concern him now, his heart relived the hurt, not for himself but for Kate who had believed in love so deeply this had to have crushed her.

Reading about her promotion, it all made sense now, when her personal life was in the crapper, she turned to her work, old habits were hard to break which made her the successor to Roy. He knew her well enough to know she was deeply hurt and embarrassed, and he struggled about what he should do if anything. Hell, it had been almost three years now, so what good would it do. Just as he finished that thought his cell phone rang,

************************************************************************************/

Chapter 4

San Clemente, California

Via Escorial Drive

Casa Castle Estate

Next Day

"Rick, this is Walt Austin, we need to talk"

"Hi Walt, why so serious, I mean we aren't getting sued by anyone again are we?" Rick joked, trying to lighten his attorney and friend's mood.

"No Rick, nothing like that, in fact, that would be easier to discuss than what we need to talk about. I know this area is the one you are the most sensitive about and it really pisses me off that I need to bring it up to you again, so before we get started, just know I'm sorry to do this." Walt was serious, a tone of sadness in his voice

"Damn Walt, if you were a doctor talking like that, I would be pre-paying my funeral services, what the hell is it? We've been together too long for you to worry so much, look whatever it is I promise you I can take it." Rick once again tried to lighten the mood.

"Rick, I got a letter from Katherine Beckett, sent via special messenger yesterday, and she's requesting I forward it to you,"

"Walt, don't you mean Beckett-Edwards? She's married or was the last I heard and now is the Captain of the 12th precinct." Rick's tone became serious,

"You got part of it right Rick, she was married, they filed for divorce after 11 months and it was finalized about 3 weeks ago, I guess it was a real donnybrook in court," Walt said

"Well, not my monkey, not my circus, so what did she write that was so important that you felt the need to call me?" Rick was confused, and perhaps a bit relieved to hear the rumors were true, she had dumped him, and it took two years in court to settle it.

"Remember when we set up the memorial scholarship fund in honor of her deceased mother? We got that nasty certified letter, and we canceled our plans and advised the Dean, I know you were questioning why the hell would anyone turn such a gift like that down. We got our answer, her ex-husband had blocked the efforts without ever telling her anything about it." Walt said patiently, waiting for an explosion from the other end.

"Well, that would make sense, if Beckett didn't know about it, she can't be held responsible for the actions that piece of work ex-husband of hers did," Rick said calmly, surprising Walt,

"Rick are you OK? I was expecting an explosion of expletives, why are you so calm?" Walt asked in surprise,

"Why Walt, hell it's been three years almost, I've moved on, but I'm glad to hear that Kate hadn't completely lost all her marbles. It was bad enough when she started up with that Robbery Detective, but when she married this douche in just three months, I washed my hands of her and anything to do with her life. I wanted to share with her the same as I did the other members of the 12th and you're right, I was floored when the offer was rejected so rudely."

"Well, that's one issue, she is and was always open to the idea, so I think I should send you the letter to let you read it then you can tell me how you want to proceed. Rick, she's aware you may not want to talk to her, so that's why she contacted me to act as the go-between. She said it was important that you knew the whole story."

"Scan the letter and email me Walt, and I'll look it over when I get time. I mean three years later, I'm not going to be jumping through hoops for her, hell she never even said goodbye." Ricks voice couldn't disguise the hurt he still felt,

"Sure thing, I'll get it to you this afternoon and forward the original to you, you may want to read both, and Rick, I am sorry, I know this is painful. Let me know when you make your decision, talk soon," and the call ended.

Xx

Three Days Later

The email that Walt promised to Rick with the scan of Kate's letter had been received in less than one hour. Even though it was just a scan he recognized the stationary she used and remembered it was the last present he had given her. It wasn't for Christmas, but she happened to mention that she liked it when they were standing in front of a store waiting for a suspect to come walking up.

He went back after he left that day and bought it for her, then researched the web for some made-up holiday, if he recalled correctly he gave it to her for National Hug Day, and joked it was safer than trying to hug her, he didn't want to get shot. She acted as if it disgusted her at the time, but he caught her stealing glances at it during the day when she didn't see him.

He was in his office when he heard the door open, and the sound of Gina's voice.

"Hey Rick, you home?" she called out, after using her key, she would always have a key to his home and a special place in his heart,

"Back here in the office Hot Stuff" as he laughed, she hated being called that. It made her feel like one of the cheap blond bimbos on The Price is Right TV Show,

"What did you call my Buster? Looks like you want to get your ass kicked again," she laughed as she walked through the door and hugged him and kissed him on the lips gently.

"I called you Hot Stuff, that's what you are if you would just admit it and accept one of those many dates you keep getting offered. I told you, I'm fine, I have my work, and all sorts of hobbies, go enjoy and live your life." He was holding her hands, and looking in her eyes,

"Rick, I know you mean well sweetie, but I'm not ready, the only man I'm comfortable around is you, and God knows, we had our ups and downs. Even when you were a jerk, I knew you loved me, and would never hurt me, I'm not there yet with the trust," She looked up at him with sadness in her eyes that he did understand all too well, he had caused many of the tears she was fighting to hold back now.

"I'm sorry Gina, I just want you to be happy, and you not hanging around me, to be sure I'm OK, I am fine, I promise you." He said sincerely

"Well is there anything you want to tell me? If you're so fine why haven't you got back in touch with Kate Beckett?" She asked as his face turned a deep shade of red,

"I was going to tell you about that Gina, it's just that*"

"Rick, Sweetie, we're not married, you don't have to explain yourself to me, but I'm here if you need to talk. I just don't want to see you hurt and wind up in the arms of another Maddie," this time a tear did trickle down her cheek "I got your mail, it's on the table, I know Walt sent you a registered letter I signed for it on my way over, that's who you used to set up the scholarship fund you had to pull back on isn't it?"

"Yeah, well do you have a few minutes, can I get you something to drink, or*"

"Sweetie, I brought us both bottles of water, so come on, let's go to the veranda and talk about this. Something is eating you up inside, and I'm here for you like you are and always have been for me." She pulled him up using both hands and hugged him when he stood. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't be so pushy, but you know I never stopped loving you, even with Richie, he understood, and never felt threatened."

"You know I love you too, Richie asked me once, why things didn't work out between us, and how we could overcome all that and still love each other" Rick looked over to the mountain range, remembering the conversation almost like it was yesterday.

"He asked me the same thing, then he proposed after I answered him." Tears came to her eyes, then she got a grasp, "He never would tell me what you said, so what was it?"

"I told him that I screwed up, I kept you from the one treasure that would have completed us, Alexis and I shut you out, I only wondered how you stuck it out for as long as you did.

"He asked me if I still loved you, I told him I would always love you, in a special way, but never be threatened, you loved me because you couldn't pass up some helpless soul and I never appreciated it. I still don't know why you stuck with me, loved me as you do, and no not sexual, but that was pretty damn good too" he blushed.

She surprised him with her next words, "You know it was, wasn't it?"

The look of shock on his face was priceless, then Gina kissed him again,

"What, I get needs just like you do, and hell, if we're both needy why not. We both know the score, but I don't want to embarrass you any more than I have already."

"You didn't embarrass me Gina, shocked but never embarrassed, when you're ready, really ready let's talk. I'm not Richie, could never be, but when it's right you'll know it." He said sweetly as he pulled her into an embrace as the tears fell for the man she still loved, with her heart and soul.

"Thanks Rick, you know the old Rick would have taken advantage of that, and we would have been on the floor, couch, or maybe the bed, but I know we would be fucking each other's brains out. Soon Rick, if you're still available, it's coming soon. Now, let's get that Kate mess out of your brain." She kissed his cheek and sat across from him as she crossed her long and tanned legs Rick thought God did she always have such hot legs?

Xx

Same Time Frame

NYPD 12th Precinct

Captain Beckett's Office

Kate had tried everything, running, yoga, extra sparring sessions, meditation, hell she even went for acupuncture, but she couldn't get Rick off her mind. Today was the third day since she had received the acknowledgment her letter had been received by Walter Austin, she had the text with his signature, so why hadn't she heard something. Of all days she had back to back meetings till after 1:00 PM, so she closed her door, and called the number on the contact she had created for Mr. Austin.

She was prepared to leave a voice mail, knowing lawyers typically don't get to the office before 9:00, and it was, hell was it only 7:30 AM, it seemed like she had been there for hours. She was shocked when she heard, a voice bark,

"Walt Austin, how can I help you" in a sleepy voice

"Eh, a, Mr. Austin, this is Captain Beckett, eh I mean Katherine Beckett, I sent you a letter via messenger three days ago that I asked if you could forward to one of your clients."

"Let me interrupt you Captain Beckett, I spoke to Rick, and sent him your letter, so he is aware of you attempting to get in touch with him, as well as the circumstances surrounding the unfortunate incident with your ex-husband and the scholarship fund Rick was attempting to establish. I don't know when or even if Rick will respond, but he does have your information. I'm very sorry that's all I can share with you now."

"I understand Mr. Austin, I mean it was a complete shock to me, and once again, I sincerely apologize to you, your firm, and especially Rick, God he must hate me and I don't blame him, but please, if you talk to him, tell him, I just need 15 minutes of his time. If he can grant me that, I will be out of his life forever, if he chooses, I promise."

"I'm so sorry Captain Beckett, I think you can understand this topic, and unfortunately the rouge actions, even without your knowledge have hurt Mr. Castle deeply, I'm not sure he is or will ever be ready to review that time period in his life. I will do what I can, but please, you must be patient.

"The worse course of action you can take now is to try and rush him. He's had almost three years to get you out of his system, I'm sure you can wait a bit longer now that it's his turn to contemplate what to do next. Thanks for your call, we'll be in touch when or if we know something, Goodbye."

Kate hung her head and thought of all the times she had made him wait, for answers, for facts, hell she made him wait for almost anything she could. Even worse she knew she led him on to a degree, and he was becoming her conquest, when the hell did she start acting like that?

It was after Sorenson left, blindsiding her. She wasn't sure if it was the embarrassment of being dumped publicly or if she ever even really cared for him, but she adopted the tradition that she would be the one in control going forward, this would never happen to Kate Beckett again.

Her thoughts turned back to the cases before she made the biggest mistake of her life, how was she so stupid to fall for the same lies again? He was the same slick, operator he was in High School, only this time he had more experience and was able to hide his real self from her. He broke through her defense when he spoke of their days of innocence, even mentioning her Mom and how she always wanted a vote on the movie they went to when they were only 15. She laughed then, but now she could see it was all part of his act, he was a Con Man, a damn good one, but still a Con Man.

The next thought that flashed in her head was Deming, and the look on Rick's face as he saw them, she would admit it now, she had set it up, kissing on the stairwell of the precinct. He was supposed to have gotten jealous and fought for her, not all chivalrous and step aside as he did.

Deming turned out to be a non-factor, except for the horrible treatment of Rick he instigated, and she supported rather than defend her partner during those three cases. Hell, she didn't even finish the last one before she was on her honeymoon, and without Rick, it probably would have never been solved. She dropped Deming without a second thought to be with Brent, and if there was Karma, perhaps she had received it when it all played out as it had.

She had hurt two men, Deming and Rick in her wake to get back to the good old days, Rick had quietly moved on, Deming had acted like an ass which eventually cost him his job when she ascended to the rank of Captain.

She had thoughts of Rick every day, even when she was married, but especially when she knew her marriage was over, and she had more alone time than she ever had in her life. She had seen the press clippings of him and Gina attending social events, they still claimed to be just friends but there was something between the two of them, anyone could see it. She chastised herself for that thought since it was none of her business if they were together again, it looked good on them both.

She felt the anger return to her as she remembered Maddie appearing in court on Brent's arm, and having the gall to apologize to her, and asking her to please tell Rick she really was sorry it turned out this way. Kate still didn't know to this day if her hand moved to her hip where her gun normally sat would have allowed her to blow her away or not, since guns were not allowed in courtrooms.

"Kate, I know you hate me, Rick does too, and you have the right, but you have to admit your marriage was already over before Brent and I connected, so please can't we still be friends?" Maddie asked immediately following one of the early court battles that seemed to go on forever,

"WHAT? You stand there with my ex-husband just as you did in the 12th grade after spreading your legs for him, knowing he was in a relationship and you ask me if we can be friends? Something is wrong with you Maddie, seriously wrong. You never even mentioned how much you hurt Rick who is the innocent one in this whole damn mess."

"I knew you still loved Rick like I said you want to make Castle babies but you're too afraid to go after what you want. I did, even if you hate me, Rick was never going to love me, even when we made love it was you in his bed, at least in his mind. I'm sorry, I really am, but just like high school, Brent needs something you can't or won't give,"

"Call me after a year Madison, tell me you're still all he needs then, now get the hell out of my sight before I retrieve my gun and deal with you and him the way I wanted to from the day I found out of your betrayal. You two deserve each other, so I hope you both get what you have coming" Lanie had pulled her away from the two and got her out of the courtroom that day.

Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of knocking on her office door when she looked up, she saw the smiling faces of her boys, Ryan and Esposito.

"Hey Cap, you OK, you looked like you were pretty deep in thought there?" Kevin asked, always the nurturing one, no wonder he was tagged as Castle Junior.

"Yeah Kate, you OK, I mean we're headed out to check out the body drop at 46th and Lexington, do you need anything from us before we go?" Espo asked, and even if he was rough around the edges, he cared for her as a sister.

"No, what I really need is a fast close on this, we need three cases to close by Friday to hit the new requirements from One PP. Thanks guys appreciate you asking, but I'm fine."

"OK Kate, let us know if you need us, back soon" Ryan said in his soothing tone as the two left,

God, she missed the old days, with the boys, hell who was she kidding, she missed Rick, working cases and building theory, and his coffee kisses every morning. Well get over it, you blew that one to Hell Kate, so focus on your job, that's all you have now she thought.

TBC