Another Auld Lang Syne

by Castlefan6

Authors Note: Based loosely on the song Same Auld Lang Syne by Dan Fogelberg and incorporates scenes from Food to Die For. Beckett meets Brent Edwards at her HS Reunion, delaying Caskett if not derailing it completely. Also, we may take liberties with the events and timeline from Canon and use events to make this a more believable fiction, Warning THIS IS AU, with only brief flashes of Canon.

I don't own Castle; I use the characters for amusement purposes only, except the ones I create.

Previously

"Well I know I asked you for Rick's number, I just wanted to tell you I won't do that again, his lawyer knew about it and he had his number changed to keep me from contacting him, I'm sorry I lost your connection to him for you."

Lanie looked over and said in an almost inaudible tone, "Don't worry Kate, you didn't."

Kate merely nodded realizing what her friend had just told her, she still was talking to Rick,

"Well the lawyer had a packet of forms delivered, Rick is going to fund a scholarship in honor of my Mom after all, and Lanie, he doubled what he originally was going to do, 20 students for 20 years each one receiving $25K a year, my God Lanie, that is unheard of, I mean $500K a year, and get this, he's pre-paying it so the college can use the money to invest to keep the scholarship going past his guarantee of 20 years," Kate explained as Lanie almost fainted,

************************************************************************************/

Chapter 7

San Clemente, California

Via Escorial Drive

Casa Castle Estate

6:45 PM

Rick was busy, double-checking every detail for his date, eh, dinner with Gina, she would be there in a few minutes and he wanted everything to be just right. He couldn't push down the butterflies in his stomach, or the fluttery feeling he got when he remembered their intimate times just yesterday.

Even being married to this beautiful lady for over 4 years, he never felt the way he felt today before. Perhaps it was comforting knowing he didn't need to promise the next steps or be anyone or anything other than himself. Whatever it was it gave him such a relaxed yet anxious feeling, what was that feeling, he hadn't felt it for so long. Peace, he was at peace with himself, Gina, hell the world if you wanted to get down to it.

One block away Gina was almost as giddy, acting like a schoolgirl going out for her first big date. The only difference was Gina knew how this was going to end and spent almost as much time choosing her intimates as she did her clothing. God, he had really found every spot last night and brought her to heights he had never done before, even in their marriage. She had her hair and makeup done, and how was trying to decide on the last three options of what to wear.

She eventually chose the sheer nude bra and panty set, and the light blue dress that simply slipped off her shoulders, easy access, that she planned on him using again. She missed the touch, she had missed Rick, even though she loved her husband, his words rang true in her head. "The words till death due us part is that Gina when I'm gone, don't waste a minute, go, enjoy, but be sure he deserves you" some of the last words Richie had said to her.

She had loved, truly loved only three men in her life, Richie, who was taken away from her so soon. Rick, who if she remembered correctly tried like hell to keep her happy, but she pushed too soon for the one possession that he loved more than life, his daughter. Then she smiled as she remembered her first true love, Paul Maynard from high school. He was sweet, kind and gentle, that is until she developed her boobs and he became horny as a Tom Cat and pushed for sex on every date.

She didn't yield, and he left her for an underclassman who everyone knew had more miles than a used car on her love box. Her first belief in Karma, Tom developed Herpes and couldn't get a date in three counties, after the word got out. She smiled now, but it was her first rejection, her first heartbreak that had fueled her into her occupation today.

She was happy, now that the itch had been scratched so to speak, and she knew it hadn't blown her relationship with Rick all to hell. Quite the contrary, Rick had felt the desire for her she had longed for since her Richie passed, he completed her now with just a look and his kindness.

She took one last look in the mirror, freshened the perfume that she knew made him horny and out the door she went for the one block trip to his home. That man had built her the condo after she lost her husband to keep her close to him, but give her space if or when she needed, no wonder she loved him, who would ever have thought of her as he had.

Exactly at 7:00 PM, Rick's doorbell chimed, and he took the two steps from where he had been standing watching the beautiful lady walk up to his drive, to open the door.

"Gina, you are beautiful, I mean you're always beautiful but tonight, God I hope we can get through dinner," he waggled his eyebrows and there it was the smile the real one, for her. "Please come in,"

"Thanks, Rick, you look great as well, but you always did clean up well" she kidded as she kissed him hello, it wasn't a long kiss, but somehow it felt different than it had just yesterday, calming, showing more love, or hell maybe it was just in her head.

"So, how did the rest of your day go Rick, did you get anything done after I left earlier?" she asked,

"Well, actually I did, but why don't we eat then we can have a nightcap and I'll tell you all about it."

She just realized they weren't alone; Rick had the entire wait staff standing by. When he said have dinner from Karros delivered, she didn't think he meant the entire catering staff. This man what he wouldn't do she smiled.

"Rick isn't this a little much, I mean I would have been fine with just What-a-burgers out of a bag" she smiled,

"Phish, you know how much I love cheeseburgers, so maybe next time, but today is special, well at least to me, I hope you as well, I hope I didn't misread your signals."

"If you mean that I feel free, fulfilled and loved, wanted and desired by a very handsome man, you didn't misread anything Rick, does that answer your question", as she pulled him in for a longer kiss.

His answer was a smile and a return kiss, then "Let's eat and get rid of the audience, OK?"

"Thought you would never ask, she laughed"

Two hours later the wait staff had finally left and they were alone, "So what kept you so busy after I left, sweetie?"

Rick described his actions and conversation with Walt Austin, and how he had set the plans for the scholarship back in motion, bigger than he had originally planned three years ago. Gina had moved from sitting close to him on the sofa to lying with her back against his chest, her legs extended, and giving Rick a free view of down her blouse.

He hadn't really needed it, the sheer bra, and the dress did little to hide her erect nipples, and the length of the dress, her hot legs, and flashbacks to 24 hours before, had little Richard fighting from standing at attention several times during the meal.

After he described his conversation with Walt, Gina pulled his head down and kissed him sweetly,

"I'm so very proud of you, I know that's a part of your life that is most hurtful, and I'm glad that you were able to reach out and put that program in place. You'll never know who just might emerge from that program, perhaps a Supreme Court Justice, or even President, all because you gave them the opportunity to follow their heart."

During the kiss, Gina felt the little soldier saluting, and looked at Rick with her devilish eyes, "See something you want Rick? It seems like little Ricky is saluting already"

Her answer came with one motion, she was in his arms, off the couch and being carried gently to the bedroom, where her careful planning paid off, within seconds they were having a therapy session or several sessions that lasted well into the night.

Xx

Beckett Apartment

Same Night (After the call from Walt A)

Kate returned to her apartment with the prized envelope safely tucked away, she had one project tonight and that was to complete the forms required to make Rick's gift honoring her Mom a reality. She stopped at the bodega, picked up a ready to go meal, not even concerned what it was, she hardly tasted anything lately anyway and headed home. Once inside she tossed her keys on the counter, the echo of them landing always reminded her of how alone she was.

She slipped out of her Captain clothes into something comfortable, an old NYPD Sweatshirt, two sizes too big, and a pair of joggers that had seen better days. She really didn't care about appearances, no one would be coming over anyway, and if they did, it wasn't someone she was motivated to try to impress. She ate her meal, rather almost swallowed it whole, and then proceeded to the task at hand.

She began to read the forms, carefully following the instructions, leaving her signature off the forms, until she could see Roz Karpowski, who was a Notary for the station tomorrow. Walt Austin had done a remarkable job completing the forms, she verified her Mom's information, then completed the empty spaces he had clearly marked. She loved that he had attached little stickers with arrows to the lines requiring a signature that read, Sign Here Please, BUT be sure your Notary witnesses it, no wonder Rick trusted him. The man was more anal to detail than she was herself.

She was still in shock of the amount of money Rick was donating, he hadn't seen or spoken to her in almost three years, God what would she say if and when he was ever ready to call or talk. She had already apologized for the actions of Brent, she needed to explain, no there was no explanation, just apologize for her actions the last few weeks he worked with them at the precinct.

She had worked on the forms for almost two hours till she finally reached the end of the stack. She gave a quick double-check to ensure all the information was complete and accurate and all she would need Roz to do would be to witness her signature and notarize the 12 forms Walt had indicated and placed them back in the envelope to return.

She reflected on the last three years, how empty her life had been, how she had the world in her hands one moment, or so she thought, only to find out it was a lie, Brent was a lie. Making things worse, Maddie had dumped Rick to cheat with her now ex-husband.

This was so much more than the high school betrayal, they were adults, and Rick was innocent, he hadn't deserved that treatment from Maddie, hell who was she to talk. He didn't deserve the treatment she had dished out, especially the last few weeks they worked together. When she remembered the look on his face when her high school kissing routine with Deming went south, she cried.

She did what she always did in the past when she felt she needed to see him and couldn't, she went to Richard Castle dot com, logged in with her username and password and entered the chat room of current events. Everyone was posting messages about the new book, some had been privy to target the publication, and were going crazy about it.

"Just wait, just wait", one user typed, I don't think I have cried so much since my mother passed away, he grabbed the essence of my soul with his conversations between Doctor M and the patient. I laughed, then I cried, and then I went back and read it five more times, it's compelling." She had signed her comment with her username, Castlelover4ever.

Kate thought new book, what new book? She searched her membership at Barnes and Noble and sure enough, she had received an advance notification of the new book coming out in three weeks, today was the last day to confirm advance purchase, so she clicked the add to cart box and then read the synopsis of the book she had just ordered as well as the PR Blurb from Black Pawn Publishing featured on the B&N Page.

"Black Pawn is pleased to announce the return of Mr. Richard Castle who recently completed the very successful Nikki Heat series. We welcome his new character, Dr. M, and the series titled Do No Harm, The Essence of a Doctors Soul, with each book dealing with a new doctor, and a new set of challenges and rewards. Please join us for his first release, where he introduces us to Doctor Alex Menendez. The release date for the public is tentatively scheduled for August 30th. Thanks for your loyal following,

Gina Cowell, Managing Editor.

The page went on to publish a short synopsis of the first book, August 30th was only 4 weeks away.

The first book introduces Dr. Alex Menendez, a product of migrant farm working parents who worked his way through college, and Medical School with honors, and now was chief of Emergency Medicine at a large suburban hospital. Do No Harm, The Essence of a Doctors Soul giving an insider perspective of how the Doctor was impacted by the carnage seen daily in the Emergency Room, the victories, and then the true agony of losing a patient, and sometimes a friend. Advance copies are available to reward members with a two-book limit per order.

She was glad she caught the notice just in time but wondered why she hadn't received her normal advance notification, then it dawned on her. That SOB, checking her spam folder she saw a list of unread email notifications from not only Barnes and Nobel but the website itself. Brent must have read her email when she left her phone open and tagged the messages as SPAM.

She relaxed after going for her evening run, each step landing on the faces of Maddie and Brent, she wasn't sure which one she despised more tonight, by the time she returned to the apartment, showered and dressed for bed, she had calmed down.

She took her iPad with her to bed, brought up the Richard Castle sight and began to read about the past and archived events, she woke several hours later with the iPad beside her, blank screen from timing out, but she was able to sleep at least four hours, more than she had in a long time.

Xx

The next morning, she felt a lot better. Reading the details of Rick and his activities during the last few years had somehow made her feel closer, well at least more in the know of what he had been up to. She had read all the Heat series, and once again was surprised at his kindness to her character, choosing for Heat to fall in love with a soldier, and leaving to be with him at his next post.

Rook went back to his old life before Heat until he met someone and started dating, proving there was love after Heat after all. She wasn't sure if it was a message to her, that he had moved on in his real-life or just a kind way to exit the series.

She went through all her morning activities and arrived at the precinct at her normal time, 6:45 AM, with one lonely coffee, the only one of the day she would consume. Since she returned to work, especially after the separation and eventual divorce she began to drink tea. Coffee was too much of a reminder of times gone by when things were simpler, and she wasn't as lonesome as she was now.

She thought of her Mom when she would let a thought of the old days sneak through her defense, "Be careful what you wish for Katie, and remember I told you so when things fall apart and you're alone. To have a friend you need to be a friend." She was right, as usual, the job, always the job, then her marriage, which was all built on lies, then back to her job. She was fortunate that Lanie was as kindhearted as she was, or she truly would be a woman without one friend.

She opened her office closet to hang her coat, and there it sat, it was his, it would always be his. A gaudy, old, ugly chair with a sign that read do not touch, remove or relocate by order of Captain Katherine Beckett in bold writing. She moved it to her office once she was promoted after almost shooting a night cleaning person for touching it.

She knew it was there, even if she wanted to pretend she didn't, it was the last thing she had of his to hang on to, pretty pathetic she thought, she had chances, tons of chances to move to a relationship with Rick, but she screwed them all up, now she had his books, souvenirs and the gifts given to her, and this damn chair.

God, it had been almost three years, why was she thinking of Castle so much now? He and Gina regardless of what the press printed where in some type of relationship, even if it were only bed partners, a woman can tell those types of things. Why else would she have uprooted her life and moved to Los Angeles with him, just his editor my ass she thought.

Then she thought, why the hell do you care, you never did when he was here, why do you care now, why is it so important for you to talk to him now that your life turned to shit, and his exploding with success, WITHOUT Nikki Heat or the precinct. Admit it, Kate Beckett, you have feelings for him, you have had them since you met him. Why the hell did you do what you did, Brent Edwards? God you were such a fool, as her mental war raged on, she didn't notice Lanie slip into her office after knocking softly.

"Kate are you OK?" she asked, and Kate jumped in surprise.

"You scared me, Lanie, yeah, I'm fine, just lost in some thoughts." She said sadly,

"Care to share, or am I correct in just saying Rick, Girl, you have to snap out of it, he's moved on Kate, maybe to never come back or speak to you again. I don't want to burst your bubble, but sweetie, the ship you held in the palm of your hand has sailed, without you." Lanie said in such a sad tone,

"I know Lanie, I know, it's just well, you ever do something and then wonder what the hell you were thinking about, you told me, everyone told me, then Maddie drug me to the High School reunion, and hell, I fell for the biggest con in the world, what an ASS I was." Kate lamented,

"Sweetie, I hate to tell you, but you were already acting like an ass, one-word Deming, you had to know he would hurt Rick. I can't figure out one thing, you have feelings for him, and shut up, you know you do, so why do you hurt someone who is so obviously head over heels for you? God Kate, there are women throughout this and other precincts who would walk over hot coals to have a chance with him," Lanie didn't hold back

"You're right Lanie, but well I have to move on the same as he did, but I would like to apologize for the Deming era, I know he's already heard about Brent and told me he doesn't hold that against me, but Deming, that was my screw up.

"I don't know if Walt Austin would forward a letter of apology to him or not, I mean once Roz notarizes these documents, the scholarship is done on my end, just waiting for Rick to work it out with the Dean on timing." She said, sadness filling her eyes

"Kate you get two pages, I may lose the ability to talk to him so make those two pages count and I'll forward the letter to him, that's the best I can do."

"Lanie, thank you, I will, you can read it even if you want, I mean*"

"Kate, it's your letter, remember two pages max and don't make me regret this," she said as she waved her hand and walked out of her office, giving her friend the most hope she had in years.

TBC