"I...you're speaking English. And using the correct inflections on my name. And you're not paused like everything else." She nodded then shot a glance at Washu.
"Wren," Washu started. "There's something I haven't told you. Something that you'll need to know now, and may change how you do things in the Jump-Chain. It's also relevant to the situation at hand," she said with a gesture to Ukyo, who was staring at the ground.
"You remember how I told you I'd spoken to your wife before I set down the rules we agreed on?" I nodded, my heart heavy. "Well...I may have omitted some information in an effort to help you grow as a person." My gaze snapped to hers.
"What didn't you tell me, Washu?" I asked quietly. My eyes were wet, memories of my beloved flying through my mind with the knowledge that it had been decades since I'd seen her and would be centuries more. I felt like I'd break under the weight of that knowledge. Washu simply shared a look with Guinevere, who glided down to a stop on the ground in front of me. What happened next would have been forever imprinted on my memory without Savant, without a ridiculously high intelligence score, even without any form of enhancement at all.
My fiery familiar looked me directly in the eye, then began to flow and transform until the form of my most precious person stood before me. Her arms opened, and I flew into the embrace. My entire being was overcome with the joy of being reunited and the acceptance I'd seen in those beautiful eyes. I murmured nonsensically into her ear and wept freely. I had no idea how long I stood there revelling in her embrace, but eventually I pulled back enough to look into her eyes again.
"My love…#)$(** ." I stopped, then tried again. "#)$(** .?" It wasn't working. I couldn't say her name. I knew it, but couldn't say it. She smiled at me and shook her head.
"You can't say it. It'll be a while before we're ready for that. But good things come to those who wait, ne?"
"But..why? I know it, but I can't even seem to think it!" I cried. Washu looked away guiltily.
"Protection, my love. True names are powerful things for those with an inherently supernatural nature. Moreso for gods. Just call me Guinevere, or Gwen. Ok, not Gwen. I keep getting reminded of Spiderman's first girlfriend who dies every time to make room for stupid Mary Jane. I like Guinevere more. You know I like history and legends." I nodded, but couldn't stop crying. The overwhelming mix of emotions was just too much, but I would never dare shut it away.
"How long? How long have you been with me and I didn't even know it?" I asked desperately. I had to know. I'd killed people, let people die, and been at least part of the cause of such tremendous loss of life that I could never have imagined it before the Jump-Chain. That wasn't even counting the emotional damage I'd done neglecting the people I'd left behind. She looked at me, still with love but also with regret. She'd told me many times it was hard for her to see other people cry, especially those she loved deeply.
"I wasn't really here until a while after Guinevere became your familiar in truth. She's linked to your soul now, and I felt that…because she was a part of me. I watched over you as first Ember, then Misty, then Officer Jenny, Sabrina, Sung-Ah…" She trailed off. "I think part of me actually influenced Sung-Ah, since by the time you left she was madly in love with you even though she knew it would never work. Those people weren't really me, but I could watch you through their eyes, hear you through their ears, and feel you in their thoughts. Even now, this isn't the entirety of my being. I've got my own patron, if you don't recall!" I smiled at that, sure that she'd been up to all sorts of crazy stuff learning to be a super evolved space god thing. There was more hugging and a few kisses. I might have even snuck in a grope or two. She spoke into my ear as we embraced.
"Before you bonded with Guinevere she was a construct of the Jump-Chain itself. She was more an item than a living being. It was easy enough to co-opt her form to be near you, but I wasn't allowed to interfere except as she would have. I couldn't watch you all the time of course, but I hated not being able to see you. My mentor and Washu agreed it was in both of our best interest to take some time apart, but that we also shouldn't be separated the entire time. It was unhealthy, I think Washu said. There was also something about losing her test subjects to emotional breakdowns that turned them evil." She gave me a stern look at that. "I don't mind the occasional rampage if it's warranted, but you are not to start murdering people without reason husband of mine. Also: you need to get laid. Badly. I've never seen you go more than a few weeks without some form of relief, so what the hell are you doing to yourself? Seriously, I'm ok with you getting a little sexy-time. It's not like I've been pure as a Vestal Virgin, but I always have you as my goal. My mind is full of naughty ideas for our reunion and you'll be…happy. Very very happy."
My face lit up a brilliant red, and I could hear Ukyo choking on her own spit. I fought down the intense stab of jealousy with a combination of Gamer's Mind and logic. Mostly Gamer's Mind. Washu was giggling hysterically. I shot a glare at both of them through my lovely wife's hair, but it didn't do any good. Ukyo was just as red as I was and attempting to look like she wasn't listening in, while Washu was actually pointing and laughing now. I changed the subject, not even trying to be subtle.
"So….daughter? I thought that was against the rules? No children and all that?" Washu's snort was not helping my blush, nor were my vaunted shapeshifting powers.
"Yes, love. I approve. I don't want you spawning with anyone but me, but adopting someone who truly cares for you and you've come to feel the same for? That's not what the rule was supposed to prevent. Besides, no diapers or screaming for whatever disgusting things babies eat or drink at 3 in the morning? Sounds great!" I nodded slowly, then looked to Ukyo over...Guinevere's… over Guinevere's shoulder and gestured for her to join the hug.
"Welcome to the family, Ukyo. I hope you know what you're getting into." Her smile was breathtaking, and she charged into the hug like an overly affectionate rhinoceros. It was only my enhanced physiology and a little bit of chakra-sticking that kept me on my feet, though Guinevere didn't seem to be affected at all.
"I've filled her in on what you're going through with the Jump-chain and a lot of your past, but she hasn't decided yet if she's coming with you. You've got years yet to talk that kind of thing out, and she's pretty attached to this world. Guinevere approves, too. You're a father." Washu sent.
My strength buoyed by the tearful reunion and the hug I was sharing with my family, I nodded. With my love watching over me, be she near or far, I could do this. I would do this. For our family.
-
We spent what felt like hours together, Washu having summoned Ember at some point, exchanging the stories of our lives. Our fears, dreams, and ambitions were touched on but limited since Guinevere couldn't talk about anything after my Jump-Chain started except in the broadest of terms. My heart ached when it was time to say goodbye, but having that deep connection and knowing we were always together in a way brought me a great deal of comfort. When Guinevere disappeared this time it wasn't to some unknown place: I felt her, as if she'd fallen asleep and leaned against my soul for warmth. The flash of white light she left in was nothing like the fireball she used in phoenix form, and made me smile softly. I knew who, or at least what, her mentor was now. That had just confirmed it. She would be having fun as well as learning a lot.
Washu bade us goodbye and we appeared in my warehouse home, now expanded into a set of spacious fully-furnished apartments stretching infinitely upward. There were windows in the walls now, allowing the afternoon light of the faux-sky to illuminate the home more naturally than the electric lights we'd been relying on before. We'd still need those at night of course, but it was nice to get a little sunlight. I decided then and there that I'd be planting some trees and grass around the house to make it feel more natural. Examining my place in the story courtesy of Savant took a few moments, and I remembered that I also had some mushrooms to pick up.
While Ember and Ukyo slept I scryed for some prime specimens of Japanese horticulture, grabbed some seeds and cuttings, then did the same for the magical Kairaishi mushrooms that changed a person's age when they ate them. I was able to find the place they grew fairly quickly, but it took a lot of [Observe] attempts to find the particular mushrooms I was looking for. I found it curious that I still retained the inexplicable urge to kick mushrooms from before the Jump-chain, but it was easy enough to ignore. It had never been a great idea anyway, since mushrooms could be toxic and I was allergic to a lot of things including certain types of spores.
Returning to the warehouse and using [Mokuton/Plant Manipulation] to grow out a few rows of trees and grass was relatively easy, but figuring out the magic to keep the soil both moist and nutritious for the plants was trickier. I ended up relying on a lot of intent-based spells and copies of what I'd done for the garden, since I didn't actually know exactly what each plant needed and wanted to keep everything from growing out of control too. I didn't want to have to mow the lawn in my extradimensional warehouse, and golems were getting kind of boring. At the thought of the golems, I teleported up to the first unused portion of the garden and started using [Mokuton/Plant Manipulation] to grow more of the Kairaishi mushrooms. Those would be a valuable resource in the future, I was sure.
As the sun started to rise in the faux-sky I stopped in the house/apartment to make Ukyo some breakfast and do a little cleaning. Homemaking Skills turned a little cleaning into doing all the laundry, sweeping all the floors, etc. as well. I wasn't about to fight having a clean home. Since Ukyo still wasn't up yet I decided to really put the perk to the test. The entire warehouse was my home, right? So if I started cleaning an infinitely large space...nope. Damn. I tried the rest of the apartments next, and found myself suddenly standing at the top of an infinitely large series of squeaky clean apartments with no mana and a lot of used cleaning supplies in my inventory. A little under a minute later I was back to full and ready to teleport back to the bottom.
My new daughter (that was going to take some getting used to) was up and eating, looking around the freshly cleaned apartment appreciatively. She looked ready for school except for the fact she was wearing the male uniform and a giant baker's peel on her back. Eh. My little girl could wear what she wanted as long as she didn't get arrested or attract attention she couldn't handle. I wondered briefly if that made me a terrible parent, and amended the requirements to also not show any of her naughty bits.
"Good morning, Ukyo! Would you like me to walk you to school? Do you need anything? I can show you around the rest of my home when you get back if you like." She jumped, and I remembered that I wasn't usually very eager to engage with people. She'd also been alone for a long time before I offered her a place to stay and someone to look after her.
"Um...good morning. I know where Furinkan is by now, but thanks. So, do I call you dad now? How do you want this to work? Guinevere and Washu talked to me about it and kind of prepared me for the extra weirdness in your life, but I still don't know how to do this. I hated my dad. Or is it mom when you're like this?" She trailed off, looking adorable and unsure. Also uncomfortable, but that was understandable.
"Ukyo, you're my daughter now. I can't exactly register it with the local authorities since my legal identity here is...you know, I never bothered to learn my birthday here. I'm sixteen-ish. Anyway, you're my daughter. If you want to call me mom, dad, Wrin, Wren, or even 'hey asshole!' I'll probably be alright with it. Do what feels comfortable. Except that last one. Unless I really deserve it," I finished with a smile. She giggled and nodded shyly. I really hoped I was cut out for this parenting thing. Guinevere and I had never had any children before I was scooped up for this adventure. On that note, I had a surprise for the young woman at my table.
"Daughter...wow that feels strange. Good, but strange. Ukyo, I have a surprise for you. I've been working on it for a while, and I think it's ready."
"Ok...dad. What is it?" I smiled kindly at her, and gestured for the door to the rest of the warehouse. I'd been keeping the cart pretty close by but not in the home, since I didn't want to get any sort of mess inside. She followed me, and when we turned the corner so she could see the cart she stopped. A look at her expression said she didn't believe what she was looking at, but she approached it slowly anyway. Tears started to build as she slid her hand over surfaces I'd repaired and enchanted, but made sure looked exactly like I thought they would have in her memory. Even the sealed pots of fermenting sauce remained inside. She was crying with happiness when she turned to me, and launched into a flying glomp that I returned with a hearty hug. Perhaps too hardy. Her back cracked a bit. I ran a wave of [Holy] energy down it just in case, but she didn't even seem to have noticed.
"Thank you. Thank you so much!" She breathed.
"You're quite welcome. I actually did this before you asked me to adopt you, and I added a few things. Would you like to see?" She nodded eagerly, and I approached the cart.
"Well, this originally ran on a limited supply of wood and coal. The storage box down here," I reached down to open it, "now has an unlimited supply. If you don't feel like using either one, I've also added a little bit of illusion and enchantment work to supply heat without burning anything. This spot on the back with the sticker is kind of a control interface."
I pointed to a silly sticker that had been almost completely gone before an overpowered repair/conjuration spell restored it, and her smile softened. When I tapped it twice in quick succession, the griddle area started to heat by itself.
"Tap it twice thinking of how hot you want it and it'll start. Tap it twice again thinking about it being off and it'll turn off. As an added bonus you can tap it twice while thinking about it being clean, and it'll automatically be clean!" Ukyo's eyes were wide with wonder. "I've also enchanted the other compartments to hold more than they normally would and keep the contents hot, cold, and room temperature respectively. What do you think?"
I received another hug and an ear-piercing squeal of delight. I was almost afraid to show her the feature that shrank the whole thing down into a cube she could put in her pocket. Tinnitus and actual sensory overload didn't seem to be a problem for me with Gamer's Body but that was still a very loud high-pitched noise very close to me.
-
With my family situation both changed and highlighted by recent events, I started alternating between martial arts training with the Saotome and Tendo families in the afternoons and magical training with Ember and Ukyo. They were both in my Gamer party now and gaining skills rapidly. I'd gifted Ukyo the ability to use magic and she was quickly catching up to me in terms of [Energy Affinity (Heat)] and [Elemental Bending (Fire/Heat)]. Apparently she found both immensely useful in her favorite hobby: cooking. With my somewhat broader range of experience and the knowledge passed on from Ku Lon she was also catching up on cooking foods other than okonomiyaki. She'd known a lot of other recipes and methods before we started, but now she was approaching legitimate chef level.
Ranma, Mu Tsu, and Ryoga had finally managed the basics of [Shapeshifting] in that they could now make temporary changes to their appearances, and I'd set them to work memorizing everything they could about their uncursed and cursed forms for safety in case they achieved a lasting change and forgot what something was supposed to look like. I also loaned them a few medical textbooks to study, since I didn't want them screwing up their organs or bleeding to death because they did something stupid. Mu Tsu was the only one who didn't glare at me for that. The fact that the curses didn't keep them from transforming like they did me and Ember was annoying, but I chalked it up to "rules as written" applying to me and not them.
As far as martial arts went, things were coming along swimmingly. Ranma had passed on what he learned of Martial Arts Tea Ceremony, I'd finally learned the Tendo ki manifestation technique, and Ku Lon had started both myself and Ranma learning the Hiryu Shoten Ha after Happosai decided it was a good idea to use a technique he only vaguely remembered and had lost the scroll for to teach the Ranma a lesson. It hadn't worked, and resulted only in a burn mark that was easily healed but the Amazon Matriarch thought it was a good idea regardless. Happosai was tied up and tossed back in his cave after another introduction to The Shovel. He'd get out, sure. But he'd be out of our hair for a while.
There was an incident where a man dressed like a playing card king showed up and started cheating people in card games, but restraining him and calling the police worked wonders. The man had apparently been wanted for quite a while, and his ki presence was somewhat higher than average. I cursed him down to normal human levels just to be sure he didn't escape or cause the good law enforcement folks any trouble, and never heard from him again.
The winter holidays came and went, which was kind of odd since I didn't think any of the Tendos or Saotomes were Christian but they celebrated Christmas anyway [1]. I enchanted Ukyo's baker's peel for her and gave Ember a comb enchanted to groom her in animal form when she willed it. The Saotomes and Tendos all got harmless (and thoroughly inspected) magical trinkets scavenged from Death Eater homes, except for Nabiki who also got a pouch of gold-wrapped chocolate coins. She seemed a little disappointed it wasn't real gold, and would discover later that the pouch was enchanted to refill itself automatically.
-
The new year, 1990, brought with it new challenges. The troublesome principal of Furinkan had returned and was not at all happy about how things were going in his absence. He introduced some inane rule about how students had to have their hair cut then led said students on a merry chase around the school in search of a coconut that would exempt the student who found it from the rules. There wasn't much I could do about the haircut policy that wasn't overkill, but when I heard the kids' descriptions of the obstacle course and traps planted all over the school I decided there was another moron endangering and exploiting young people. I'd been aware something like this would happen of course, but hadn't been sure how extreme the principal's behavior would be.
The next morning Principal Kuno received a visit from the Silver Witch and a cursory scan of his mind revealed no curses or physical damage, so there wasn't anything to cure quickly. I knew the theory aspects of mind-healing from the Potter-Verse, but I seriously doubted it would help here even if I could subject the man to continuous treatment over a period of weeks or months. A calming spell and a short discussion showed he couldn't be reasoned with, so I applied the same curse I'd used on the playing card cosplay fellow earlier and called the police about his antics.
They didn't seem interested in listening to what I had to say, but after a lot of convincing they finally started interviewing students. The interviews lent my claims credibility, but given the general attitude of police in the area and the fact that (somehow) nobody was injured they told me they would keep an eye on the situation but weren't prepared to make an arrest. Since I'd cursed that man to limit his abilities to those of an average human his own age he probably wouldn't be able to directly cause more trouble, but I was sure it would come back to haunt me.
I had to get involved again when the man insisted on teaching Akane how to swim. She'd calmed down a lot and was able to learn a bit from the class she was to be tested in, but was still basically solid muscle and sank like a stone. I asked Ranma for help since I knew he could swim, then created a time-stopped instant dungeon and conjured up a heated pool. Before I left I warned them not to get up to any funny business and warded the place to collapse if either of them lost their swimming attire or were in any way uncovered by it.
Akane and Ranma both appeared a moment after I left blushing up a storm with Ranma desperately looking for his swimming trunks and Akane trying to hide the fact she was looking at him. With lidded eyes I splashed Ranma with cold water and conjured a one-piece bathing suit over him, then set up the whole thing again. This time I warned them I'd tell the fathers what they'd been up to if they fooled around. I deliberately did not smile as Ranma vehemently denied anything had happened, and that he'd lost the trunks after a dive into the pool. Akane was still admiring the now-female boy as I left, this time without trying to hide it. Akane did end up learning to swim, and the two kept any inappropriate acts to themselves.
When a creepy guy in super fancy clothes showed up and started talking about taking one of the Tendo daughters as his bride and Ranma said something about losing a speed-eating challenge to the man, I started getting angry. When he explained his new bride was compensation for an unpaid dinner bill some two decades in the past I paid him with an evil look at Genma and Soun. The man still refused to leave, so I whacked him with The Shovel a few times to dissuade him and he ran off. Later that same day Ranma approached me for advice.
He'd been meaning to ask for help understanding some of the things he'd been going through with Xian Pu and Akane anyway, but had apparently found the two of them kissing and not fully dressed in Xian Pu's room when he went to visit the Cat Cafe. He didn't want to go to either of the fathers with it, and he knew I was a lot older than I looked and hadn't revealed any of his own antics to the nominal adults of the house before. I snorted, having observed the interactions between the three for a while and called Xian Pu over that night for a discussion between the four of us. I'd expected awkwardness, but I hadn't expected them to turn it around on me. Ukyo had been talking to her friends for advice regarding her new father. Thankfully I'd thrown up an instant dungeon and some wards to maximize privacy after we sat down at the dining room table.
"Xian Pu, Akane: I know you both feel strongly for Ranma. I've seen it. I've also seen the looks you give each-other. Do you have any problem with sharing him between you? Say one marriage in China and one in Japan?" The two girls, both fire-engine red, shook their heads but refused to meet my eyes. Instead they were staring at the spots in front of them at the table. Ranma's mouth was hanging open, so I closed it with a finger under his chin.
"Are you both aware of how societies view same-sex and other non-standard couples?" I continued. They nodded again, with Akane mumbling about how she'd been the same until recently. I switched my gaze over to Ranma, who was now glassy-eyed and drooling.
"Ranma! Are you aware of the tremendous amount of trust these girls are giving you? How something like this could socially ruin them, and possibly even make it difficult or impossible for Akane to find a job if she ever wants one beyond the dojo?" Ranma was still drooling, and the girls looked solemn. I slapped him lightly and repeated the question, and it came out that he'd never actually been given the official Talk, just coached through it by the girls. Guinevere appeared on my shoulder, and I could see the glimmer of intelligence in her gaze. At least I wouldn't be alone in trying to straighten this out. I turned back to the girls.
"Can I assume you've all at least seen each other naked by now?" Reluctant nods followed. "Then this will be an excellent time to get you acquainted with some basic safety issues," I was a firm believer in making absolutely certain that people got the message so the following talk included lifelike illusory reproductions of generic humans. First was vocabulary, then came consequences, then came birth control and technique. After that I asked if they had any questions, and everything went normally (red faces, horrible embarrassment, and all) until Akane asked if Kasumi and I were going to have children. My confused expression and silence was no help.
"She likes you a lot, and I've seen you checking out a lot of people but never anybody as much as her," Akane accused teasingly. "You're both gone for a lot of the night sometimes, and I've heard her call your name even though our rooms are separated by Nabiki's! I've even seen you leave together!" She looked so smug for someone who had something so completely wrong.
"Akane… your sister has been taking night classes and I don't sleep. Ever. I'm capable of it, but it's not necessary. We leave together because I escort her to and from classes if they're late at night, just like I did you when I thought you were in danger. As for the rest...um...I think I might have to talk to Kasumi. She's beautiful don't get me wrong, but she's also something like a third of my age and I'm obligated to leave after a while. She deserves someone who can marry her, make her happy, and give her children. In the long run I can't do any of those things." I heard a quiet gasp behind me and knew things had gone to shit. Akane and Xian Pu were looking over my shoulder in horror and Ranma was hiding under the table with his fingers in his ears.
"Kasumi is standing behind me, isn't she?" Akane and Xian Pu both nodded. "How long have you been there, Kasumi?" I asked, turning around with a look of regret. This wasn't how I'd have liked to handle the situation.
"I came through the strange barrier just as Akane finished explaining how loud I've been," she murmured with a blush. I sighed and beckoned for her to join us at the table. Ranma and the girls left, and I added a [Barrier] to prevent anyone else from walking in on the coming conversation.
"I'm sorry, Kasumi. You are beautiful. Beyond beautiful, even. This isn't my home, though. We could be together for a time and even grow to truly love each other, but I'd still be forced to leave when my ten years are up. I'm also sterile." When this didn't get through to her I started to explain the Jump-Chain and the circumstances of it, how I was already married to someone who would always be first in my heart, and that she deserved better than an old man who couldn't help but ogle women younger than he should. She actually laughed at that.
"And how old should they be, then? Your body is seventeen years old, just like Ranma's. Even if you'd lived a thousand years you'd still have the same problem. How can you deny yourself...deny me? Even if it's not forever I want to know what it's like to be truly loved!" She cried, tears starting to fall. "Before you came I was nothing but the surrogate mother for my sisters! All I ever did was cook, clean, and dream of being free! You changed that! With one gesture you changed my life! And you didn't stop there! I'd have to be an idiot not to notice that you've been helping with the chores, you took in poor Ukyo and gave her a home and a parent, and you dragged my father out of a bottle after I failed for almost a decade! He's teaching again! Not just you and Ember and Akane, he's actually got students signed up to start next month who are paying for instruction!" The tears were streaming down her face now, but she kept going.
"With Ember teaching me magic and how to sense it, did you really think I wouldn't notice the way you've warded the house? Especially after Happosai? She told me what those wards do and how powerful the protection you've placed on my home is. She also told me they're permanent, and that you could easily be living in the same place you've got Ukyo and take back the money for the rest of your stay. You helped me get over Tofu, you help me cook and bring home food when I feel tired, and you keep that fucking pervert Happosai from attacking us in our own home!" That last part caught me off guard. I'd never heard Kasumi shout or swear before. Now she'd done both. I looked a Guinevere, and discovered that a phoenix could perfectly convey a "get on with it" look before she cuffed me over the head with a wing, winked, and vanished in a ball of flame. Kasumi gasped.
"Was...is Guinevere a phoenix? I've wondered ever since I managed to see through the falcon illusion, but Ember never said one way or another." I nodded slowly, going over the situation in my mind. Guinevere clearly had no problem with this, and I'd been beating myself up over the same points Kasumi had just neatly shut down for a while now, despite Guinevere and Washu talking to me about it. Kasumi was a genuinely good person. Wonderful, in fact. If I wasn't already married I'd be tempted to settle down here with her. It would be heartbreaking to leave her here if we got involved, rather than the merely difficult it would be if we didn't.
Kasumi watched me silently, allowing me time to think. I'd already gotten attached to the people here. A few of them, anyway. Akane, Ranma, Ryoga, Ukyo, Xian Pu, and Kasumi mostly. That was how it worked for me, though. I had a few close friends if I made any at all, and I was both very close to and very protective of those friends no matter how long it had been since I'd seen them. If they were able to keep me from isolating myself, which Ember had been slowly working on since we'd been able to reliably communicate, then I got so close to them they were more family to me than my blood relatives. I looked up into Kasumi's watery eyes and asked her again if she was sure about all of this, if she was sure she could be with someone who wouldn't be in it for life. Her smile indicated she knew the decision I'd come to, and she wasn't wrong. I teleported us to an unused apartment in the warehouse.