CLASS OF 2017! Not my graduation, but my sister's! My sister graduated college yesterday and I'm still emotional about it. I'm just so proud of her for her hard work over the years and she finally fucking did it! *clap clap clap*
SO! Here's chapter 39 ladies and gents… x(
chapter thirty-nine
Once I said those last five words, I felt my heart drop to the pit of my stomach.
What did I just say...?
I sensed my mouth agape including my body calming down from rage. My eyes found my way to Carly's and her eyes are staring at me with a dull look that could kill someone. I would know.
Her lips are pursed, her eyes are narrowed, and her jaw is tensed as she is still staring at me. In this situation I could no longer speak words while I'm shocked at what I just said, I don't know what to say. I can't take it back... the words are out and are out there forever. It feels like when you post something on social media and it is stuck there forever for everyone to see. Now my words are out there forever as Carly is sitting next to me.
But the real problem is my confession just now. Did I mean what I said?
"Freddie is mine, and he will always be mine because I'm in love with him!"
I mean, it can come out accidentally, right? However, what I said can't just come out like that by accident; what I was feeling must've been stuck inside me for a long time, and I haven't gotten the guts to admit it out loud for myself. But I just did that in front of somebody who has a crush on Freddie also...
Suddenly, I heard a small snort from my right and I aimed my eyes at the person who did that. Carly is smirking while her lips are quivering.
Is she laughing?
She couldn't hold it in as she doubles over laughing with a few snorts along the way.
What the... what the hell is happening?
I continued looking at her as if she lost her mind, which she is. Because one minute she was going off at me talking about how Freddie is hers and now she's laughing so hard while her face is turning crimson.
After a few moments, her laughter dies down while letting out a few giggles. "Oh my god, that was awesome." She brought her index finger near her eye and wiped a tear away from laughing too far.
"Huh?" I asked skeptically.
"My plan finally worked." She smiled, cheerfully, staring at me.
"What plan? What the hell is going on?" I was demented trying to figure out why she went bipolar and why she thinks this was funny.
She sighed as she gives me her full attention. "I wanted you to admit your feelings for Freddie, so I tricked ya! I wanted to make you think I like Freddie and how smart and cute he is, blah - blah - blah. So I wanted to get into your soul for you to express how you feel about him. Because I've seen the signs ever since that day at Subway, you were so gullible to believe what I said." She chuckled.
I felt... nothing.
I couldn't express how I was feeling. She knew this whole time about me having these feelings about him, and she tricked me just to make me admit something?! I curled my hands in my hair in frustration and tried to calm myself down, again, from this conversation.
"Don't hurt yourself now," Carly said.
"Don't hurt myself? I'm so fucking confused!" I exclaimed pulling my fingers away from my messed up hair. "Why the hell would you invite me over here just to make me admit something about Freddie?"
"Like I said, I wanted to help you express your feelings towards him. Because if we were going to talk about him at some point, you weren't going to say anything, you were going to hide it in." She replied calmly. "Why do you think I'm a psychology major?"
I looked over at the coffee table seeing the two mugs set on the table with the hot chocolate probably cold now from being there too long. She actually tricked me... my plan today was just to come here and hang out with her for the first time and probably discuss my problem about Freddie. It's like she read my mind before I came over here and did the fucking job!
"But how did you know that I came to talk to you about that?" I asked curiously.
"I didn't... but now I do." She laughed. "Besides, the times I saw you, it looked like you were stressed about something and I had to figure it out." She shrugged. "I wasn't lying when I said I wanted to help you if you needed it."
I nodded my head not knowing what to say next. She did help me somewhat... she made me confess something to myself that I never thought I would admit out loud to. But how is it possible? How come I didn't know about that before?
"And do you know what would make you feel better?" She asked, and I shrugged my shoulder slightly waiting for her to continue. "I don't like Freddie."
I look at her as I wasn't expecting that. She doesn't like him? "You don't?"
"Of course not. I mean he's a nice guy and cool at what he does, but I don't like him like that." She laughed. When she said that, it made me feel like I can fly and the relief is getting through my body. However, something didn't seem to connect... how did she find out about Freddie's mole and toned body?
"Wait, so how did you find out about his mole and stuff?" I asked knitting my eyebrows.
She stared at me for a brief second and widen her eyes. "Oh, you see one time he was taking off his work shirt and his tank top lifted up a bit that made me take a small peek at his stomach, and that's when I saw the mole."
Ooh...
"And I bet he has a nice body and all but I'm not interested in that." She doesn't? "The only person I like is Gibby..."
If I had water, I would've done a spit take.
I coughed in my saliva from gasping too hard and was choking on it from the unexpected news. I felt my tube beginning to close up on me as I was about to lose my cool.
"Are you okay?" Carly asks worriedly patting my back roughly getting me to come back to life.
This is how I die: Sam Puckett Dies from Finding out that Carly Shay Likes Gibby Gibson.
"Sam, don't choke!" Carly kept patting my back for a few minutes until it was starting to hurt. I slapped my hands across from her to stop hitting me and she pulled away.
"Get off!" I said, feeling my throat clog come back up again making me breathe.
"Are you okay?" She asked again with her hands up in surrender.
"I'm fine, I'm fine." I breathed once more... "GIBBY?!" I exclaimed. "You like... Gibby?"
She dropped her hands on her lap and looked out into space with a small smile on her face. "Yeah..." she said dreamingly. "I just love how he doesn't give a crap about anything, you know? And how weird he is... he's just..." she trailed off not saying another word.
What the fuck?!
I look at her disgusted that she would like Gibby. I mean, Gibby's cool in a way when I hang out with him sometimes, but someone liking him is just creeping me out!
"Anyway! Enough about me," she snapped out of her thirsty thoughts about her crush and looked back at me. "Listen, Sam. I know I went too far about... him. But if you need to figure out about this then tell me because I want to help you have closure so you wouldn't feel trapped." She said serenely.
I looked into her eyes and didn't see evil in them like I saw before. Her eyes are filled with patience and supervision as she's telling the truth about what she said. Maybe she does want to help me... should I give her another chance? I watched her carefully and took a deep breath, exhaling about to make a change.
"I don't know where to start..." I replied rubbing my hand on my face.
"Well, just start at the beginning. When did this all start?" She asked scooting closer to me with her elbow on the top of the couch with her hand supporting her cheek.
I gathered my thoughts and tried to remember when this started happening. And then a light bulb lit up as I slapped my hand on my forehead being so stupid!
"I should've known..." I mumbled.
"Should've known what?" Carly asked.
"When we were kids... I had a small crush on him when we were in first grade. There was this boy who bullied me, he took my juice pouch and stomped it on the floor, I started crying and then Freddie was there to kick the boy's dick." Carly snorted while covering her mouth and I let out a small chuckle thinking how funny it sounds today. "And then I felt something for him after that... I didn't want to say anything to him because best friends don't like each other that way. So I kept quiet."
I cursed under my breath for not recognizing this sooner. I liked him because he was always there to protect me and he made me happy even as little kids. I guess the feelings went away when I met Jonah and I tried to forget those feelings I've had for Freddie.
Then they came back.
"I'm such an idiot!" I yelled. "Because when I met Jonah, it just disappeared in a flash," I snapped my fingers indicating how fast it went. "Then right after Jonah broke up with me and Freddie having sex with me, it all came back–"
"Woah, Woah, Woah. Timeout." Carly interrupted, holding out one hand horizontally and one hand vertically while the middle finger of the horizontal hand is touching the palm of the vertical hand. "Two things. One, who's Jonah? And Two... you had sex with Freddie?!" She exclaimed.
Dammit...
"Uh..." I scratched the back of my head feeling uncomfortable. "Well, Jonah is my ex-boyfriend." I looked down at my knuckle and saw the pink swelling. I held up my hand for her to see evidence on what really happened to it. "I punched my ex-boyfriend in the face at the mall, I didn't hit it on a shelf."
She mouthed, "Wow" with her eyebrows raised being surprised.
"Yeah... he dumped me because he was getting too tired of me and just wanted to have sex with other girls. Plus, he cheated on me because he slept with girls behind my back. Fucking dick" I rant rolling me eyes.
"Oookay..." she nodded. "So you punched him because he made you mad and you just went for it?" I nodded my head at her question and she nodded once again with a grin forming on her lips. "You go, girl!" She chirped.
I let out an airy laugh. "Thanks."
"So what about Freddie and you having sex, I'm very curious." She asked on the edge of her seat with her eyes wide of curiousness. I leaned back as she's too close to me being so nosey, but I have to realize that she's trying to help me figure this out.
"This is gonna be embarrassing. After Jonah broke up with me, I was clearly upset for two weeks, and then I started watching romance movies which were a let down because I don't watch that sappy crap. Then Freddie asked me if I'm willing to do a one-night stand with a guy and I said "No". So... Freddie then recommended us... having sex... together." I said awkwardly not meeting her eyes.
"You guys are doing friends with benefits?"
"Were... since he's not talking to me." I corrected.
"Oh my god. This is like Mila Kunis and Justin Timberlake, alongside with Ashton Kutcher and Natalie Portman." She squealed.
"Yeah, yeah, yeah." I waved dismissingly getting annoyed at hearing the same thing. "But after that moment, I started having deep feelings after we've had sex for the first time." I looked at her while she looks at me earnestly.
"What did you feel?"
All the memories flash back in my brain of the times I felt the spark in my body from what Freddie did. I turned my whole body facing Carly and brought my legs criss-cross on the couch. This might change everything on what I'm about to say, so I need to use this opportunity correctly, and I'm going to do that.
I sighed and hugged my arms as I feel nervous discussing my feelings with someone else other than my uncle who was the first one to know about my feelings. Here goes nothing...
"I felt..."
Cliffhanger XD