GUYS! I can't wait to see the premiere of RAVEN'S HOME! My childhood flashed back in my eyes when I saw the trailer! Yes, I'm 19 and still act like I'm 3 when the good shows were on T.V. But you know what I don't fucking care! I LOVE BEING ME!

If you guys are going to check it out, we'll virtual high five for being kids again!

So, like Raven would say… "OH SNAP!"

Enjoy this chapter!

chapter fifty

I couldn't move my feet at the sight of my father standing in the doorway. What is he doing here? How did he know where we live? It's just not possible for him to be here...

I felt myself getting a mini attack not knowing what to do. I haven't seen my dad in a long time and I don't know how he's going to react when he sees me. The last time he saw me was when I was seven years old, and now I'm all grown up.

Something just doesn't seem right.

"Hi, Sam. How are you?" He greets Sam with a fake smile.

"Um... I'm sorry who are you?" Sam asks politely sounding confused.

"Oh," he chuckled. "I'm Freddie's father, remember?"

It took a while for Sam to respond to my father as she too was shocked at the visitor. Why would he randomly come visit on this day? Or any day at all. Today was already going off to a great start, but now the man who's related to me decides to show up without warning?

"Oh... Mr. Benson. It's... nice to see you, again." Sam says flatly.

"You too, Sam." I might've missed it, but I could've sworn he looked impatient as he was still standing by the door, but that look washed away with a smile as he has his hands in his jacket pocket. "Can I come in?"

No... don't let him in.

Sam looked over her shoulder an inch without facing us and turned back around to my dad. She walks to the side of the door, gesturing him to come inside with a blank expression on her face.

Shit...

As he walks in, he notices the five people in the living room giving him a rude glance, including me. He has the nerve to just pop in here without telling anybody. Why is he even here?

Mixed with my resentment towards him, I felt uncomfortable as I shove my hands in my back pocket, looking at the man's appearance. He's wearing a blue plaid shirt, brown leather jacket, blue denim jeans, and black hiking boots. He hasn't changed a bit as I looked at his face: his brown eyes similar to mine, his gel hair brought back, and a slight beard he's growing.

I can't believe my father is standing right in front of me...

It's like I'm looking at the man when I was seven years old again before he left my mom and me. I just want to know why he's here after all the things he's done to me and my mom and why he would be here now. At a special day that is meant to be filled with happiness.

"Hello, everybody." He greeted everyone in the room as Sam walks back in the room after closing the front door.

Everybody was silent feeling a thick tension in the apartment by his presence. He was glancing at everyone with an artificial smile until he stopped at the woman with brunette hair and the woman he was married to. "Hello, Marissa."

My mother stares at him with the deadliest glare I've never seen on her before in my life. I would do the same thing being in her shoes, but I don't even know how to move at this point because I'm feeling so uneasy right now.

"Leo, what the hell are you doing here?" My mom snapped.

Leo... I remember that being his name. Short for Leonardo. It's funny how you forget everything about your father after he leaves for fourteen years without a call or explanation to why.

"Marissa," he frowned. "I thought we talked about this. I wanted to come by and visit you two."

"No, we didn't agree on that. I told you to never come back!" She yelled without a care in the world of who's in the room.

He chuckles wickedly that made me shiver down to my spine in disgust knowing what my mom told me about him. "You know, I don't listen to what you have to say. If I want to come back, then I will." He turns next to her seeing me for the first time in years.

I feel scared for some reason... from him watching me for the first time. I finally see the man he became. The man who abandoned his family because he couldn't take responsibility and thought it was too hard to raise a child who needed a father. Why didn't he see that? Because he was that selfish, and now I'm scared because I'm afraid he's going to do hurtful things that will make me breakdown again after holding them in.

"Freddie?" He shows a slight smile on his face while walking in front of me. We're almost about the same height as he is five-foot-nine and I'm five-foot-eight so I can see him eye-to-eye for being an adult. I can't believe he's the same person as me being blood-related; I never expected to be related to him in a lifetime after what he did. "Wow, son, I can't believe it's you."

He extended his hand to rest on my shoulder, but I backed away a step not wanting him to touch me, giving him a scowl.

"Huh," his hand falls to his side shrugging his shoulders. "You're all grown up, huh? You look just like me when I was your age." He chuckled. I can't believe he's acting like everything is okay while everyone is weirded out by this.

Finally, after a while, I asked a question that I've been dying to figure out.

"Why are you here?"

He stared at me with an expression I couldn't describe from my question. He must have some reason why he's here after all this time and just shows up today. Is he trying to play tricks on us? After my mom and I had discussed a while ago about him coming back, she didn't explain why he's trying to come back. Now that he's finally here and is standing in front of me, I get to know the reason in that thick skull of his.

He turns his motionless expression to the false smile again as he answered my question. "Can't a father come back and see his kid?"

I flinched from the mention of father. Is he even my dad? He wasn't there for me in forever, and he calls himself a father? He's probably pretending to see me so he wouldn't look like the bad guy. But that didn't help anything because he is the bad guy.

As I didn't respond to his question, he continued to what he was saying. "I wanted to come by and see you and your mother. Is that a crime?"

He must be shitting me.

"Are you kidding me right now?" I asked sharply.

He looked innocent as he shook his head at my sudden outburst. "No... why would I joke about that?"

I tried to control my body as I felt my fist curl tightly, feeling my hand go numb. Sam walks closer to me and wraps her hands around my upper arm trying to calm me down like she usually does, but this time it's not working.

"Leo, you have no right to come here and say that you wanted to see your kid! How did you even know where we were?" My mom asked with her eyebrows knitted.

"I have my ways." He shrugged again. "Besides, I'm not leaving after I get what I want." He smirked at mom as she looked sick to her stomach.

"Here for what?" She spat.

Sam wrapped her arms around my arm but I couldn't keep my body from boiling just looking at this man. This is a joke. Is he really here to visit me, I can tell in his eyes that he wants something other than that and it's not pleasant. I need to know what he wants before I make him answer myself.

My dad sighed looking at the ground, shaking his head slowly. After a minute, he brought his head back up and looked at my mom with an angry look on his face. "Fine, Marissa. You want to know so badly? When I called you, I told you I needed money; fifteen thousand dollars—cash. And I didn't receive any. So now I'm here to pick it up, and... I hope you have it before this gets ugly."

I stared at the man surprised from his cruel words towards my mother. Was that the reason he wanted to come back? Because he wanted fucking money?! He can't be serious. And my mom didn't bother telling me about this when I went to talk to her before. I'm more shocked at the threatening tone he used on her after she's done everything for him in the past...

"Listen, you need to back off, Leo." Mr. Puckett stood his ground at my dad giving him a disastrous look.

"Oh? And what are you going to do, Jeremy? Beat me up and end up in jail like your brother?" He scoffed.

I felt Sam's arms tightly seizing onto my arm after my dad's offensive comment. And I couldn't take the bullshit anymore.

"What the fuck is the matter with you?" I spat as he looks at me, expressionless. "You must be insane for coming into my house and threatening the woman you used to marry about her lending you money because you're selfish! Were you really going to come here and pretend you wanted to see us so you can get money out of us?"

Leo shook his head once again staring at me this time with a vicious glare he gave to my mother. His cold brown eyes are looking at me as if I'm a stranger in his list. "Yeah, and you know what? I'm glad I left that bitch of a woman who also carried a piece of shit for a child I called my son when she was pregnant with you. I should've left right after you were born because you were worthless in the beginning." He snapped.

I tried so hard not to break down right here in front of people after hearing my father's words. Am I really worthless? I didn't know I bothered him that much when he was living with me. I didn't know he hated me that much...

I blinked back the tears that were attempting to come out of my eyes and gave my dad a blank expression as he smirked at me, challenging me to say something.

But he doesn't know that I'm not going to say a thing.

I yanked my arm away from Sam's arms and pulled my fist back and punched the man in the jaw with my fist, causing him to stumble backward groaning while covering his mouth.

Gasps and screams filled in the room once I shook my hand trying to get the pain away, but I couldn't focus on that as I saw my dad staring at me in shock and pulled his hand away from his mouth, his mouth filled with blood.

That's not enough, he deserves more than a broken jaw.

"You son of a bitch!" I was about to punch him again, but someone's arm pulled me back roughly, and Mr. Puckett came in front of me with his hand on my chest trying to push me away.

"Freddie, stop!"

I ceased to squirm, seeing my dad over his shoulder and saw him groaning again, trying to cover his mouth with his hand looking away from us. Mr. Puckett pulled his hand away from my chest as I started to feel like I was going to be sick.

I turn to my mom and saw she had her mouth covered with her hand and tears welling up in her eyes, in shock looking at my father.

She didn't deserve to see that...

I can't deal with this.

I felt myself panting for air as I turned around and raced to my bedroom, ignoring people who are calling my name. I rushed into my room and slammed the door behind me feeling hot tears brim in my eyes. I walked to my bed and sat down, running my hands through my hair, clutching it hard, finally sobbing.

I can't get my father's words out of my head. He thinks I'm worthless... he didn't even want to be around me when I was born, and he tried to use my mother to lend him money as he came today on Christmas Day. Why does this have to happen to me? I don't know why I don't deserve a second parent to love me like my mother has for years. Isn't that what a real family is? Two parents loving their children no matter what?

Why couldn't he do that for me?

My sobbed increased, feeling myself pulling my hair out of my scalp not caring about the pain. What does it matter... I'm just a piece of shit anyway.

I heard a rapid knock from someone behind the door as they sounded panicky. "Freddie?!"

Sam... she can't come in, not right now, not after what I did in front of her family and in front of my Mom. Now they're going to judge me for punching someone I thought was my father, but now he's just a total stranger who I share blood with.

The door opens and a pair of footsteps walk inside the room, closing the door behind them. "Freddie." Sam rushes over to me and sits next to me on the bed, placing her hands on my hands that are still clutching my hair. "Freddie, please let go."

"No, just leave me alone," I croaked.

"I am not leaving you," she argued as she pulled my hands away from my hair without me fighting back. I can't feel anything in my body but my heart breaking slowly. More tears escaped from my eyes as I couldn't stop crying from the incident in the living room. "Oh, baby, come here." Sam scoots closer to me on the bed and cups my face with her hands, bringing my face close to hers as she pressed her forehead against mine.

I shook my head rapidly trying to control my breathing.

"Baby, I'm here. Shh... it's okay... calm down," she whispered, wiping my strained tears away from my cheeks as I continued to breathe briskly.

"I can't... I can't..." I sobbed.

"Just listen to my voice, okay?" She said softly. "It's okay... I'm here now... you're okay..." she whispered. I listened to her angelic voice with my eyes closed, and the sound of it made me calm my breathing down a little as she continued to wipe my tears away. I started taking deep breaths and exhaled them softly trying to ease myself before passing out. "That's it... good job." She kissed my forehead, lingering her lips there for a few seconds before pulling away.

"Sam... I'm a joke." I croaked, feeling myself breathe normally again.

"What do you mean?"

"You heard what my dad said... he thinks I'm a piece of shit a-and w-worthless." I sniffed and continued to talk. "What kind of person wants that for a son?" I asked rhetorically as I pulled away from Sam's hands and leaned my elbows on my knees with my head down.

"Are you really going to listen to that bastard?" Sam asked. "He had no right to come here and talk badly to you and your mom like you guys are nothing! I can't believe he came here years later just to get one thing. Freddie... he's not worth it. He'll never be worth it after that." Sam said as she brings her hand and rests it on my back, comforting me as she gets closer to my senseless body.

"But... I should've seen this coming. Why would I think I would have a father who actually fucking cares about me and not leave me when I needed him the most?" I questioned furiously. "After all this time, he waltzes in back to my life and threatened my mother about money and calling her a bitch," I stood up from the bed and paced around the room feeling my body boil again. "And then he says he wanted to see us again so casually like nothing happened before? Well, I got something to tell you, I will not stand here and be played around with someone like that when there's a reason for having a family in the first place. SO FUCK HIM!" I exclaimed.

Without me realizing what I was doing, I punched my fist in my bedroom wall with the same hand I punched my dad with.

"Oh my god!" Sam cried. She jumps off the bed and runs to me, grabbing my injured hand and looking at it carefully. I looked down at my hand and saw my knuckles gush out blood from hitting solid objects twice. I can't even feel it... "Freddie, what have you done?" Sam teared up, softly moving her fingers on top of my knuckles trying to remove the blood, like it was even possible.

I can't even control my anger because I'm thinking about that man who was outside from this room. Now when I think of him, I feel my body raging, and my hand turning into a fist wanting to hit him again for all the things he's done. But I don't want to look at his face ever again.

It's too painful...

"Freddie! Look at me!"

Sam's hand came back caressing my face, turning my head to face her. Once my eyes met hers, my heart broke again at the sight of it; she has tears pouring out of her blue eyes with pain in her pupils staring at me. I caused that to happen after I had promised I never wanted to make her upset in any way... now look what I've caused.

"Baby... you need to stop making your dad win. He doesn't deserve a person like you who knows how to make people happy. He should have never said those hurtful words to you because they're not true. You are not a piece of shit or worthless; you're the most amazing man I've ever met, and you will always be that way because you're nothing like that douche of a father. Even if he doesn't... care about you, you have multiple people that do care. It's like I said a while ago... you're not alone." She whispered.

Suddenly, I felt my breathing decreasing as I felt my heart beating again. Hearing Sam's words hit me in the heart as if it tried to repair all the broken pieces that were scattered inside. Now my heart is back together in one piece knowing that what Sam has said is right. Even though I'm going to feel lonely for not having a father in my life anymore, he's just one person. I have other people who I consider family that cares about me more than him, and that's better than nobody at all. But the one person who I can count on is the petite girl in front of me looking at me with those blue eyes.

She always knows how to make me feel better even if I don't feel one hundred percent great. I know she cares about me because she's been there for me all the way through in my life without leaving. She will always be my Guardian Angel without me knowing it.

Once she saw me calming down, she pressed her forehead against mine again looking at my eyes only. She's watching me as she roams one hand to my hair, stroking it softly causing me to close my eyes at the comfortable feeling.

"I'm so sorry you had to hear that... you and your mom didn't deserve that from him." She said sympathetically.

I shook my head leaning my face against her other hand, caressing my cheek. "No... I'm sorry you had to see me punch him in front of you guys." I sniffed.

"Actually, right after you left, my dad took very good care of him by punching his nose and kicked him out of the house without an explanation." She chuckled lightly.

I let out a small laugh thinking how her dad handled it after my first move on hitting the guy. "Tell your dad I said thanks."

"I will."

I opened my eyes and stared at her eyes again seeing how blue they are like the sky not covered in clouds on a sunny day. Her eyes made me so weak I wanted to look away, but they're so beautiful to look at. How did I get so lucky having this girl with me?

"Thank you. For saying what you said... I didn't want you to see me like that." I muttered.

"It's okay," she said sincerely gently running her fingers through my hair. "It's not okay to hold your emotions inside. You had to let it out... I understand."

I didn't reply.

"Do you want to rest, baby?" she asked after a minute of silence, pulling her hand away from my hair to my shoulder. Maybe lying in bed will help get rid of this headache I have and help me forget the early incident in the house.

"Yeah... It should help clear my mind." I replied. She nodded as she withdrew her hands away from me and stood on the side guiding me to my bed. I laid in bed without taking my shoes off as the covers are beneath me being unused. After I had gotten myself comfortable, I looked up at Sam and gave her a pleading look. "Can you tell everyone out there I'm sorry?"

She grins lightly bending down and kisses my forehead. "I know they'll understand." She rubs my arm at the process and pulls away from it. "I'm going to get you some ice and some bandages so I can fix your hand."

"Thanks."

She came back up and turned around, heading to the door, opening it, and walks out closing it quietly. What a mess this day has been. Why did he have to come here and ruin everything?

I sighed as I laid on my back staring up at the quaint white ceiling.

Merry fucking Christmas...