A/N: This chapter is much more Bella/Jake centric but they had some catching up to do and maybe the playing field is a little more level now...

The Bonfire

Edward just held me after that and maybe I should've been freaking out about the situation with Charlie, but I felt more peaceful than I had in months. Alice eventually started growling from my bedroom and Edward threw me over his shoulder, flying upstairs. I shrieked in surprise and he set me down beside my bed with a grin. Alice already had six bathing suit options laid out and I surveyed them carefully. My cell buzzed in my pocket and I saw Jake was calling me.

"Oh, it's Jake." I said, taking in their reactions.

Edward lifted the phone to my ear. "I know." He said simply as he pressed accept.

"Bells?"

"Hey, Jake." I tried to sound cheery.

"Honey, Edward called me and I'm on my way to the station right now. Don't pack up your stuff. Charlie's being an ass."

I glanced at Edward and he wore a blank expression. "Jake, he's going to bite your head off if you go there."

"I seriously doubt that and you know what, maybe I'll bite his off first. He had no business trying to kick you out. Don't worry, honey, I've got this and I'll see you tonight."

I was struck by the anger in his voice. Good luck, Charlie. "Okay, just be careful, thank you." He hung up and I realized what a truly amazing friend he was. He was going to convince Charlie to let me stay over Edward. I shook my head and turned back to the bathing suits. Edward gave me a wary look.

"I'm fine. I don't know if I can say the same for Charlie though." He chuckled and wrapped an arm around my waist, pulling me into his chest.

"Well, if Charlie is really serious, you have plenty of options." I raised an eyebrow.

"Obviously, you could come live with us. I'd get you an apartment here if you wanted privacy. Or Jake offered a spot on the reservation. Let's hope it doesn't come to any of that." My jaw went slack and he kissed my cheek. Alice was eerily silent, but she nodded in agreement.

"I'm not moving somewhere you can't go. La Push is out."

"It's an option." He said simply.

Alice conveniently decided to distract me. "Bella, I'm starting to think you're not grateful for my fashion advice. I'm not feeling very appreciated as of late." She pouted and I hugged her, directing my attention back to the choices before me. I pretended to think on it a little longer than my actual decision time, so she knew I was being thoughtful. I settled on a simple, classic red bikini with white polka dots. It was reasonably modest and still cute, plus she picked out a black lace cover-up to match.

I thanked her multiple times for her expertise to reaffirm my genuine gratitude and she left with a beaming smile on her face. Edward followed me quietly to the kitchen as I melted some butter in a pan and began preparing the chicken.

"They won't have food at the party?"

I sighed and rolled the chicken in a pan of breadcrumbs. "They will. I just know the fridge is empty and I didn't want Charlie to be hungry."

My throat felt tight like I couldn't swallow. "Especially if I won't be here, I don't want him to go hungry."

Edward looped his arms around my waist from behind and kissed the top of my head a few times. "He'll come around, Bella."

I nodded numbly and we were silent as I finished the chicken. Even after I cooked Charlie's dinner and dressed for tonight, taking extra time to style my hair and replace the make-up I lost from crying, I had over an hour until the bonfire. I settled on the living room couch with Edward or more accurately, settled on Edward on the couch. He watched an old black and white film playing on TNT and I dozed in his arms.

He woke me up a few minutes before Jake was supposed to get me. I knew something was off from his expression and his tone of voice, but I didn't press. I waited for him to bring it up and as he interlaced our fingers, he started.

"Bella, I want you to be open-minded tonight."

I frowned. "About?"

He wore the mask again and I couldn't decipher his emotions. "I don't expect you to have your mind made up about anything. You told me how you feel and I did the same. Sit with it and see what you think."

"I know what I-"

He cut me off. "Please, Bella. Just try to be open-minded. We'll have all of eternity if that's what you want, but it should be what you truly want."

I opened my mouth and shut it as the doorbell rang. I just nodded my head and pecked his lips, hopping up to answer it. Jake stood on the porch patiently, smiling.

"You ring the doorbell now?"

He laughed and rubbed the back of his neck. "Not risking walking in on something." We both shuddered imagining that scenario.

"I know we have to go. Just let me grab my purse and my towel." He slid into the porch rocking chair. I hurried to grab both from the kitchen counter and then to the living room. Edward was sitting right where I left him. I plopped back down on his lap and kissed him.

I pulled back an inch. "I love you. I'll see you tonight." He nodded against my mouth and I stayed an extra minute, absorbed in his kiss. I wobbled a little when I stood and he grinned.

As I walked back to the front door, I tried to shift my perspective. I didn't think of Jacob when I was with Edward. I could keep Edward from my mind with Jacob. I owed him that much. Be open-minded. In the privacy of the hallway, I freely rolled my eyes at the sentiment and its futile bullshit.

Jake jumped up when I came out and unlocked the Rabbit. We both climbed in and he didn't speak until we started rolling down the driveway.

He reached for my hand and I let him take it. "Charlie's really mad, but he backed off for today. He fully expects you to stay, at least for tonight."

I squeezed his hand in mine. "He was already mad, Jake. I can't believe you talked him down." A slow smile spread across his face and he shifted closer to me in his seat, keeping his eyes on the road.

"He's mad at me, Bells. And I'll gladly take it over the alternative."

"Aw, Jake. That's not a solution. Besides, what does he have to be mad at you about?"

Jake grimaced. "It doesn't matter."

"Jake?"

"Bella, he's not mad at you anymore. Drop it."

I wasn't in the position to be demanding, but I still pressed. "Please tell me."

He held my hand tighter and drew in a sharp breath. "I told him I might have left you just like Edward if I really thought it was best for you."

I couldn't fathom the words. "Would you?" My voice was small and fearful and unfair.

"No." He said emphatically. I fought my rising tears. I wouldn't ruin a fun night with any of this. But the reality of the situation stuck with me; I wasn't selfless enough to lie to Charlie to make this all easier. Jake was.

He laughed to himself. "I also told him if I'm playing nice with Edward, he has too as well."

I leaned into his shoulder and he shifted to wrap an arm around me. "Thank you, Jake. Really, thank you."

He chuckled and cradled me into his side. "It's not like I don't have an ulterior motive, honey."

I stiffened, but didn't move. "Well, I'm still grateful."

We reached the edge of the reservation and parked in the beach lot alongside six or seven other cars. I saw the flickering firelight in the distance and we made our way toward it. I carried my flip flops when the gravel became sand.

"You followed my instructions by the way."

"Hmm?"

"You wore something pretty." He grinned and I shoved his shoulder.

I said hello to everyone and gave Seth a big hug. Emily, Paul, and Embry were toasting marshmallows while Leah and Jared battled in cornhole. They told us Rachel and Kim were walking along the beach and Quil was home with Claire since she had the croup. Sam was working late and wouldn't come until later.

Jake and I went down toward the shore and I walked to the very edge, letting it splash my ankles. I jumped back at the feel of the icy water and Jake laughed, pulling off his shirt and wading in easily.

"Are you insane? Jake, you'll freeze." He scoffed and I felt stupid, realizing he could barely feel it. He ran over and scooped me up. I struggled in his arms to break away but as soon as the water hit my body, I was clutching him toward me.

His body heat was the only thing shielding me and I cocooned myself in his arms to hide from the water. It rose to my stomach and I started shivering even with Jake wrapped around me.

"Well, I'm n-n-n-not a werewolf and I'm about to g-g-g-g-get hypothermia."

"Shit, Bells. I'm sorry." He brought me back to the beach and sat us down on his towel, wrapping me in mine and drawing me into his chest.

I smiled against him. "N-no, you're not."

He laughed and squeezed me to him, rubbing my back. "You're right, I'm not."

I wanted to feel guilty about how comfortable I was, but it was too easy to withdraw from the rest of the world in Jake's arms. "It could always be like this you know."

"Hmm?"

"I could always be here, keeping you warm and making you happy." His voice sounded joking, but I heard the solemn promise beneath it.

I held him tighter and said nothing, not wanting to confront all of this tonight. He didn't know I was completely resolved, no matter how many times I confirmed it. Edward didn't either and I drowned in the guilt of leading him on, dragging him through this with me. I burrowed my face further into him to escape that culpability, just using him more.

He read my mind. "You think you're sure what you want, but you're wrong."

I sat up and glared at him. "You don't know what I want."

He shook his head and clenched his jaw. "I'm not saying you don't love him or he isn't the one, but you can't know that yet."

I had my own fire brewing in my chest and the flames licked up my throat. "You don't know how I feel about him or when I'm sure." I wouldn't let my anger boil over and say I was sure.

Jake raked a hand through his hair. "It's not about Edward. You can't be sure because you never gave me a shot."

The wiring in my brain became loose and my jaw fell open. He gave me a wry smile. "You won't even let yourself try to love me. You have no idea what it could feel like if you just stopped fighting it."

I scowled and bled through my filter. "I'm fighting it because I don't get to string you along while I mull things over when I know I love him. It's unnecessary and cruel."

I expected his face to fall and the conversation to drop but something ignited in his eyes. "Let me decide what I can handle. I'm not oblivious, Bella. I know you love him and you're guilty for being with me, but I'm just as responsible. You don't think I feel bad for being grateful he left?"

My immediate retort died on my lips and he cupped my face. "I know how slim my chances are. You're not misleading me, but you're kidding yourself if you think you know with absolute certainty that you can't love me just as much."

He moved closer and my heart hammered in my chest. His words brushed against my lips. "Just try, Bella." I couldn't muster a coherent thought as he lowered his mouth to mine.

It wasn't frantic or compelling. It was gentle and warm and alluring. I didn't understand the way our mouths moved in sync and in some small corner of my mind, I acknowledged I was kissing him back. My brain lagged and my body took over as I pulled him closer. I doubt he even felt the effort and maybe that was for the best, since I couldn't begin to explain my actions. We just fit.

We fit molded to one another as he laid me against the towel and held himself over me. I wound my hands in his hair and his kisses became firmer, more insistent. Maybe if they were smug, I could conjure up some anger. But they were devout and loving and I was drawn back to them over and over.

He pulled back first and kept his weight above me, leaning into his elbows and panting against me. My hands stayed locked around his neck and my mind raced with the knowledge that I didn't want to release him. I was wrong. I had lied to myself to make this easier. And that truth was never more evident than now, clinging to Jake and still tasting him on my lips.

I did love him and not as a friend. Not as Billy's son. As something more that I didn't understand yet. I just had to decide if I was selfish enough to pursue it until I did. I had distanced myself and denied it, because it made everything messy and unclear. But in this moment, my love for Jacob was so enveloping and fascinating. It was new and exciting and passionate and part of me wanted to dive in and explore it.

The guilt and self-loathing were rebounding as my body calmed, but they were muddled. I couldn't think of much else besides Jake directly over me and the residual pounding in my chest. My entire body was pulsing with adrenaline and I felt dizzy staring into his nearly black eyes.

"Thank you," he murmured, pressing his forehead into mine. I sighed and closed my eyes. His mouth ghosted over my cheek, my jaw, my neck. I gripped the hair at the nape of his neck fiercely as a distraction. I teetered on the edge of delirium with his feather light kisses along my collarbone.

"Jake." I ached at the desperation in my warning, but I knew I was slipping. He nodded into my neck and sat us up.

"I'll take what I can get. I didn't even expect this." My cheeks flamed in guilt. How had I let myself lose control like that? How had I wanted to?

He must have seen it on my face because he held me close and tried to reassure me. "I asked you too. And it was worth it." He laughed and I groaned.

"I'm just making it harder." I argued, knotting my hands in my lap.

"No, you're being open-minded and I'm getting everything out of it I can while it lasts."

My head flew up, staring at his coy smile. I swallowed the lump in my throat. "He knew?" Jake's smile tightened and my stomach writhed. Edward knew what Jake intended for tonight and encouraged me to go along with it. That logic made no sense.

"I'm just hurting you both."

"No, you're considering your options for the first time." His eyes were alight with hope and it twisted my gut.

"And what happens if I choose him in the end?" I didn't bother to say 'when' because there was no use in hurting him more and in the privacy of my mind, in this singular moment, that conclusion waned infinitesimally.

He shrugged and kissed my cheek. "I'll let you go. At least I'll know I did everything I could and you're really sure."

I wanted to fight him on it and say this was all ridiculous. Instead, I just leaned into him and he hummed against my temple. "Better to have loved and lost."

We rejoined the group and I watched Jake devour seven s'mores. Everyone gathered around the raging fire and I didn't even need a blanket curled up in Jake's arms as the temperature dropped. I glanced at the rest of the circle and saw the distinct pairs; Jared and Kim, Rachel and Paul, Emily and Sam, who finally arrived. I wondered if Jake and I looked like that, unconsciously tightening my hold on him. He bowed his head and kissed just above my ear.

Leah ruffled Seth's hair and snatched the beer can from his hands. He threw her over his shoulder, running toward the beach and she screamed out curses. We all laughed and I relished in the ease I felt with them. Embry was the only one unmatched for the night, but he didn't seem to mind. He was talking to Jared about what sounded like football and every once in a while, one would playfully shove the other. Jared and Kim left first, since Kim was out cold in Jared's arms and he carried her to the car.

One by one, the group dwindled until it was nearing midnight and only Jake and I remained with Seth and Leah. Seth came over to give me a hug and thank me for the concert tickets again. Jake helped me pick out a band he liked, so I figured he would like them but it didn't hurt to see him beam about it.

He turned back to us as he and Leah moved toward their car. "See you guys at Emily's tomorrow."

Jake grumbled and Seth's eyes widened, quickly running away. "Big mouth, that kid."

"What's happening at Emily's tomorrow?"

Jake stood with me and I saw him clearly hesitating. "It's a pack thing. We usually have breakfast at Emily's on Saturday mornings."

"Okay, sounds like fun. Why is that a big deal?"

"It's not really, I guess."

I crossed my arms over my chest and paused. "Jake."

"It's a pack thing." He repeated, scrunching up his face.

"Okay," I drew out the word. "If I can't come, that's totally fine."

"No, that's not it. You can come. It's just kind of exclusive."

I frowned in confusion. "Well then why am I coming?"

He ground his teeth together and I knew this was the topic he was avoiding. He spoke out in a rush. "Usually, it's just the pack and the imprints. We had a meeting last night and since everyone was already gathered, I just asked if I could bring you. It's not a big deal. I don't know why I'm acting like it's a big deal."

I grinned as his ears turned pink and he glowered at me. "Whatever, you don't have to come. It was a stupid idea."

I wrapped my arms around him. "No, I'd love to if you want me there. I'm happy you invited me." He relaxed against me and swung me up into his arms, carrying me to the car. I might have objected but I knew it made him feel better and I was comfy with my ear resting over his heart.

We were driving for about two minutes before I realized we were going the wrong way. "Jake, did you forget about dropping me off?"

He glanced at me and smiled. "Did you even look in your bag, Bella?"

I reached for it and pulled the zipper open. My eyes narrowed at the two sets of clothes and extensive collection of toiletries inside. "Alice."

Jake laughed as we rolled into his driveway. "We thought you could use a night away from Charlie." I felt a warm flutter in my chest that they were in cahoots. Alice promised she'd try, but I didn't really expect much. She had been joking all day, but she was right. I was wildly unappreciative of my amazing best friend. I whipped out my phone and texted her 'I love you'. She responded within fourteen seconds with 'Love you too, Bella. Enjoy your freedom because I'm kidnapping you tomorrow. Girl's day, no boys ;) ' .

I grabbed my bag and we walked into the dimly lit house. Billy was already snoring. He must have fallen asleep with the game on, so Jake shut it off and brought him to his room. I went into the bathroom and changed, halfway through deciding to jump in the shower. I made it quick and wrung my hair out, slipping on my tank and pajama shorts.

Jake found me settling on the couch and rolled his eyes, scooping me up. We barely fit in his tiny bed, since he barely fit in it by himself. He read my hesitancy as I climbed in, basically on top of him. "Honey, just go to sleep."

I wasn't in the position to argue when my head met his chest and his arms encircled me. His fingers ran through my hair in a soothing way that made it hard to keep my eyes open. What did me in was the lulling rhythm of his heartbeat beneath my ear.

I was drifting off, maybe already dreaming, when I heard him whisper. "I love you, Bella."

A/N: There will be more of a balance of Edward and Jacob moments now as Bella decides. Predictions?