I was stirring some oatmeal in a pot on the stove. It was a gas stove, that's how we were able to use it. My mind was elsewhere, it was like I was on auto pilot. The reason I was like this is because I started thinking about my dad early this morning and I can't stop. What was he doing right now? Not just him, everyone. And it got me thinking about my mom and Carl. How things used to be. Everything was so simple. Back then, I didn't think so. I took that life for granted. Look at where I am now. The only thing I have to be happy about right now is Daryl, which is a pretty big thing because I love him more than I thought I could love anyone. It's just…how complicated things are.

However, I started thinking about how much trouble our relationship caused. Was all of this my fault? Have I always been a problem? My parents had some problems with me when I was a teenager, my dad even said so himself. I remember overhearing him telling Daryl about that.

I tried thinking back. I thought real hard…and then I remembered a specific memory. I don't know why this popped into my head just now. I mean…there were other things but for some reason, this is what came to mind:

It was eighth grade, and conditioning for volleyball just started. Only…I didn't want to play volleyball anymore. I wanted to quit so bad but I was afraid to. I was afraid to tell my parents because I practically had to beg them to let me keep playing.

After my brain injury due to a car accident a year prior, they didn't want me playing any sports. Well, actually I shouldn't say "they", I should say my dad. Plus, I was afraid that my mom would be upset. You see Carl tried out for sports before, then decided he didn't want to and my mom was very upset about it because she always wanted to do things when she was younger but her parents wouldn't let her. So, she encouraged my brother and I to get involved in sports or other school activities. I was always very athletic, so I decided to go out for volleyball in seventh grade. Well, I don't stick to the same thing for very long so I didn't want to do volleyball anymore in eighth grade. I just didn't want to.

Anyway, my mom dropped me off for practice one afternoon and when she drove away, I left the school. I called a friend and had them pick me up and we went places and just hung out. Well, here's where it gets bad. So, I guess the coach called my mom and told her I wasn't there and my parents freaked out and I had all these people looking for me that I didn't even know was happening. And it turned into this HUGE thing all because I was too afraid to tell my parents that I wanted to quit volleyball.

So, my friend dropped me off at home and I finally turned my phone back on and saw all of their messages and calls. I knew I was in trouble.

They were there at the door as soon as I walked in. After making sure I was okay, I had to explain to them what happened. They were not very happy about the situation, as you can imagine. My dad, especially, was very angry with me. I still remember the look on his face.

That story makes me feel like an idiot now. I should have just told them. I guess there's no point in worrying about it now. However, it's just proving the point that I was just one big problem. Just like I am now. I stood there sadly stirring the oatmeal.

I felt a light slap on my bottom bringing me out of my reverie. I looked at Daryl. "Hey." He said. "Ya okay?"

It took me a few seconds to answer. Finally, I forced a smile. "Yeah. I'm fine." I hit the spoon off of the side of the pot a few times to get some of the oatmeal off. "Want some oatmeal?"

Daryl and I sat at the kitchen table eating breakfast. He was talking and I wasn't for once. I was too into my thoughts. I felt bad for not really listening to him, but I just didn't feel right. I guess Daryl finally noticed because he asked me.

"What's 'a matter?" He said.

I looked up at my food from him, then back down. "Nothing. I'm fine."

"No, ya ain't." He said roughly. "Ya been like 'is all mornin'. Now you tell me what's wrong."

I pushed my oatmeal around in the bowl. I really didn't feel like doing this right now, but it's my fault for making it obvious. "It's nothing." I finally spoke. "I was just thinking about my dad." I didn't look up from my bowl when I said it. I heard Daryl exhale sharply though his nose, but he never said anything. I knew he wanted to but didn't know what to say. There wasn't anything to say. Neither one of us can fix it, only my dad can himself. And the last time I saw him, he ignored me. I felt this feeling run though my body as I thought of that memory. I bit my lip and pushed my bowl away. Daryl noticed. I wanted this awkward moment to end so I said, "we can go when you're done."

"Nah." He shook his head. "Ya look tired. You ain't slept yet, so we ain't goin' nowhere until you sleep fer a little."

"I'm fine. Really." I didn't want to be anymore trouble. "We can go."

"Abby." Daryl gave me a look. "There's no rush. Just sleep. Just fer a little."

I stared at him, then sighed. I didn't have the energy to argue. "Sure, okay." I nodded. Daryl kissed my forehead, then took our bowls away. I headed into the living room and laid down on the couch. I guess I was more tired than I thought because I fell asleep pretty quickly.

A girl walked into a house drinking from a bottle. She stumbled around like she was drunk. My dad and Michonne were in the house, they started yelling at the girl. The girl must be me, but she didn't look like me.

It looked like the three of them were arguing and then she threw the bottle on the floor breaking it to pieces and went into another room. A bedroom.

Just then, she reached under the bed and pulled out a little box. She opened it and pulled something out, I realized then that she was rolling a joint. She began smoking it. She didn't look happy, I still hadn't gotten a good look at her face, but I could tell she was sad or maybe angry. Or both.

She had another bottle of alcohol and was drinking that now too. Suddenly, she looked up and I saw her face. It wasn't me…it was my sister…

My eyes shot open and I sat up. Oh my God! Judith! I hope everything is okay with her. The last thing I said to her was horrible. I can't let that happen to her. I took a deep breath and looked over. That's when I saw Daryl. He was sitting in the chair staring at me with concern. I felt a little embarrassed.

For a while, neither of us said anything. We just sat there with Daryl staring at me and me with my head down. I didn't know what to say.

"Ya have a nightmare?" Daryl finally asked me.

I sighed deeply before answering. "Yeah. Well…sort of."

"You wanna talk about it?"

I looked up at him. I didn't want him to worry more than he already is. So, I lied. "No, it's fine." I let out a laugh. "It's nothing really." I waved. "I feel better after that nap, though." I nodded. "We can head out now." I stood up and stretched.

"Abby…" Daryl trailed off and looked at me. "Ya didn't even sleep fer an hour."

I looked at him in surprise. Is that all it was? "Well…I'm good." I shrugged. He didn't look convinced. "Daryl, I promise." I smiled.

"Ya sure ya don't wanna sleep a little more?"

I shook my head. "I'm fine."

He seemed to hesitate and for a moment I thought he was going to make us stay here longer. Finally, he let it go. "Alright. If ya say so." He cleared his throat and stood up. "Let's go then."

I smiled and nodded.

Daryl and I walked around trying to find a store. We were being pretty quiet for the most part. I had a feeling that was going to change soon though. I could feel Daryl giving me glances.

"You sure yer okay?" He asked me.

"Yeah, I'm good." I said without thinking and nodded. "Yeah, I'm sorry about earlier. Sometimes I can get a little…" I made a gesture and shook my head, then laughed. "I'm fine, though. You don't have to worry about me."

Daryl hesitated. "…yeah, well…I do."

"I know you do." I stopped us and smiled at him. I made my way closer, he got the hint and we kissed, right there in the middle of the road. It made me feel all warm inside. "Thank you." I smiled at him.

We started walking again and Daryl put his arm around me. Then, his hand slid down my back and grabbed my bottom. I giggled. "You can't do that right now. Unless you wanna end up doing it right here in the road." I giggled again.

"Ya never know." Daryl said making me laugh.

We walked on while holding hands. "We still gotta bit of a travel." Daryl said. "Why don't ya entertain us?"

"What do you mean?" I looked at him quizzically.

"Ya ain't told a story in a long time." Daryl glanced at me, then looked on ahead.

I smiled. "I don't know if I can think of one right now. I'll try." I shrugged. I thought for a while trying to think of a story. I wanted to tell him a good one, one that he hadn't heard yet. New Years Eve. That's a good one! "Well, did I ever tell you about the one New Years Eve we had?"

"I don't 'member nothin' about New Years Eve." Daryl said.

"Okay, well—

"No, I mean…I don't remember nothin' about New Years Eve ever." He said. I laughed realizing what he meant.

"Well, anyway…we were at my aunt's house. My cousins, Carl and I were playing Sims and we each took turns creating a character and then playing. So, the character that I picked was like an alien or something." I made a weird face. "And when I was giving it other features, it ended up looking like Jesus." I laughed.

Daryl gave me a look. "This is the weirdest story ever."

I laughed. "It gets better, I promise." I cleared my throat. "So after the celebration, my parents, Carl and I are heading home and we realized that there's helicopters flying around and the whole neighborhood was like pitch black." My eyes widened a little. "We got in, and the power was out. And I hate darkness, I just hate it so bad. So, it was like a horrible night for me and I really wanted the power to come back on." I paused to swallow. "So, I somehow ended up falling asleep…and I had this dream…" I trailed off remembering. "You're probably gonna laugh at this but, I was hanging out with that Sims character I made, like in my dream. The one that looked like Jesus. Alien Jesus." I laughed.

Daryl gave me another look. "It's gettin' so much weirder."

I laughed. "No, just wait. I'm going somewhere with this. You'll see." I took a breath. "So, this thing, Alien Jesus, told me that a good fortune will come in three hours." I looked at Daryl with my eyebrows raised and smiling. "I woke up after that. And it was like two in the morning or something." I shook my head. "Well, I couldn't get back to sleep after that because I was kind of shaken up after that dream." I laughed.

"I don't blame ya." He raised his eyebrows. "Alien Jesus."

"Shut up." I laughed. "I ended up staying up after that, I just couldn't get back to sleep. Well…at five in the morning, the power came back on. It was three hours later." I smiled at Daryl. "Just what Alien Jesus told me would happen." I giggled.

Daryl looked at me and his eyes were a little wider. "What?"

"I know." I laughed really hard at his reaction. "I told you I was going somewhere with that. Big twist at the end." I laughed. "Isn't that crazy though?"

"Yeah." He said. We were quiet for a minute. "What was the deal with the helicopters?"

"Oh yeah, I forgot about that part." I said. "Apparently, some kids escaped from Juvie and they were trying to find them." I laughed. "They found them in my neighbor's backyard."

Daryl let out one of his rare laughs. "Wow." He said.

"I know." I laughed some more.

"Listen to you, Giggles." Daryl said. "I forgot that's yer name." I just laughed again. "C'mere." Daryl grabbed me and lifted me, he kissed me a bunch of times on my cheek causing me to laugh even more.

We finally found a small shopping center and decided to look in there. We went in one store and checked it quickly, there were a few walkers inside. We killed them, then began looking around for supplies.

"I'll look for medical supplies and…feminine stuff." I said. "You look for food and maybe clothes. Anything like that."

"Alright." Daryl said. We went our separate ways.

I found some medicine and some band-aids and put them in my bag. The store was practically empty, things were scarce these days. I sighed while looking around some more.

I wandered around and finally found the women's hygiene section. There were four pregnancy tests left, so I took all of them. There was an item on the shelf that had a picture of a woman with her baby. She was smiling at them. It gave me a strange feeling and then I became saddened.

I stayed there staring at that picture. That was the first time that I actually really thought about being pregnant. I knew there was a possibility, but I didn't really think I actually was, to be honest. But what if I actually was? The thought hit me like a train and my eyes widened. I felt all the blood drain from my face. Could I be a good mom? What if they don't like me? What if we don't bond or what if we don't become close? My mom and I weren't that close. I started breathing heavily. It's been a while since I had a panic attack.

"Abby!" Daryl broke me out of my spell. I looked at him still wide-eyed. "You okay?" I could tell he was concerned.

I just stared at him for the longest time. He made his way down the aisle to me. "I said, are you okay?" He was more forceful this time. I shook my head rapidly. "What's wrong? What is it?" He put his hands on my shoulders and looked at me more closely.

I took a deep breath trying to steady myself. "Let's just get out of here." I finally spoke. "Let's find a place. So I can take these tests already." I turned and began walking towards the exit without waiting for Daryl.

We found a home, checked it then secured it. That always took up a good amount of time. After that, I started taking the items I found out of my bag and setting them on the table so Daryl could see. I looked down at the test in my hand and paused.

"Everythang okay?" Daryl asked me. I looked up at him before answering.

"Yeah." I said. I threw the box down. "Did you find anything good?"

"Not really." He shook his head. We were quiet for a minute. "You gonna…take the test?"

I hesitated. "…not just yet." I finally said. Daryl gave me curious look. "I don't have to pee right now." I kind of laughed. He nodded but didn't say anything. There was an awkward moment between us. "But you know what I am?" I said. "I'm hungry." I put my hand on my stomach. "Are you hungry? I'll make a can of that corn beef stuff."

"Alright." Was all Daryl said. I opened a can and scraped what would be our dinner into a pan, then put it on the stove to heat. I was moving quickly. I stopped and took a deep breath. "You sure yer okay?"

"Yup." I sighed. "Just hungry." I nodded. I wished that he would stop asking me that. I don't want him worrying about me. I know he does and he's going to no matter what, but I just wish he would stop. It's making me feel bad.

"Well, that's a first." Daryl snorted. "Maybe you should eat a little more than usual, you know? Just in case."

I looked down at the food. "Yeah." I sighed heavily.

It took about twenty minutes for the corn beef hash to fully heat up and get the way we liked it. We both liked it a little burnt, a little crispy. So, now we were sitting at the dining room table eating.

Every time Daryl said something about the test or just me being pregnant in general, I tried changing the subject. He's going to catch on eventually.

"Is it good?" I asked him.

"Yeah, it is." I watched him eat a spoonful. I finished the last of mine and slid my plate away from me a little. "Ya have enough?" Daryl asked me.

"Yeah, I'm good." I nodded.

"Here." He scraped some of his onto my plate. "Have some more."

"No." I tried to stop him. "What are you doing? I said, I'm good."

"Just eat a little more." Daryl said, he slid my plate back over. "Just that."

I should have ate it and kept my mouth shut but I was feeling annoyed. More annoyed than usual. "Why?" I snapped.

Daryl stared at me giving me an almost stupid look. "It's fer the baby."

"Oh my…" I put my hand over my face for a moment. "I wish you would stop it with that. We don't even know if I'm pregnant yet."

"Well, we could if you'd take the damn test already." Daryl snapped back.

"I'll take the damn test when I feel like it!" I shouted. "When I'm ready."

"Okay." Daryl said. "So, eat this while yer waitin'." I sighed and shook my head in disbelief. "It's just that. It's only a little more."

"Yeah, well, right now you're driving me a little more crazy." I glared at him. Then, I got up quickly and went into the living room sitting down on the couch.

"Yeah. Ya know what I thank?" Daryl said after some time. He got up and made his way in here. I could feel an argument brewing. "I thank…yer avoidin' takin' that damn test on purpose."

I looked up at him. "Oh yeah? Is that what you thank, Daryl?" I imitated him to mock him. He glared at me. Just stop it, Abby. A voice inside me told me. I suddenly felt emotional. "Well…you're right." I looked down. It was hard to keep from crying. My emotions were everywhere today. I must really be pregnant.

After about a minute maybe, Daryl walked over and sat next to me on the couch. He put a hand on my back. "Baby, what's wrong? Please just tell me. I hate seein' ya like this."

I took a few deep breaths before answering him. I had to calm down and steady myself so I wouldn't cry. "Back at that store," I started, "I had…a thought." I paused. "I know we kind of already talked about it, but…I wasn't thinking about being a parent, I was just thinking about having a kid out here." I looked at Daryl. "But then I realized that I could actually be pregnant and…" I trailed off because I could feel tears coming. I didn't want to cry right now.

"Abby, it's okay—

"No, wait. Just listen." I cut him off, then sighed. "I don't know…if I'm ready to be a parent, Daryl." I looked at him again. "What if I'm not a good mom?" We just stared at each other. "I'm really scared about this." I looked down.

We were both quiet for a while. "Yeah, and you thank I ain't?" Daryl was the one to break the silence. "I'on know the first damn thang about havin' a kid. And I'm like, what the hell are we doin'? We don't know anythang."

That made me laugh. "Not a clue." I said.

"We're idiots." He gave me a rare Daryl grin.

I raised my eyebrows. "You aren't kidding. We totally are." We both laughed for a minute, then smiled at each other.

"But see…we'll figure it out…together." Daryl shrugged. "So," he grabbed my hand and kissed it, "wanna have a baby with me?"

I had to laugh at him. He's just the sweetest sometimes. "Yeah." I finally said then nodded.

"But…before we jump to anymore conclusions…" Daryl started to say. I looked at him because I knew what he was going to say. "I thank ya know what to do."

I looked down and took a deep breath. "Yeah." I nodded. "I know."

"Just do it." Daryl urged me. "It's gonna be okay."

I gave him a small smile, then got up, grabbed the little box and headed into the bathroom.

I don't know why I closed the door, I just did.

I was beginning to feel extremely nervous. I tapped my fingers on the box and turned it over to read the instructions. So, if it's pink…then it's negative. If it's blue, then positive. I nodded to myself. "Okay." I said out loud.

My breathing quickened. My hands started shaking as I tried to open the box.

Just then, something stopped me. I thought about my mom. She got pregnant with me when she was younger than I was now. I'm sure she and my dad were scared. But they did it, and they were good parents.

I thought about how my mom was with Carl and I. I remembered her playing with us when we were little. And just me before Carl was born.

Then, I thought about when she was pregnant with Judith, how she was scared to have a baby out here and she almost ended the pregnancy. She didn't though, she did have the baby and look what happened. She died for her daughter. I thought about the desperation in her voice when she told me her baby had to live.

Then, I thought about now. Me, if I was pregnant and having a baby out here. It doesn't matter if I'm ready or not. It's dangerous out here. Why are we even out here? There's nothing out here for us. There's nothing out here for anyone.

Suddenly, I began breathing heavily. There were all this thoughts and images going through my mind. My mom, my dad, Michonne, Judith, Carl, Daryl, Maggie, Glenn and their baby, walkers, bad people, my mom being pregnant and dying, that picture of the woman with her baby in the store, baby…baby…baby…baby!

"Abby?" There was a knock at the door, then Daryl opened it. We locked eyes. "You okay? You been in here fer a long time." He said. I wasn't breathing as heavily as I was before but I had tears in my eyes.

Suddenly, I snapped out of it. "I wanna go home." I blurted out. Daryl just looked at me. "I want to go back. I don't care what the test says." I rapidly shook my head. "I can't…be out here anymore." I cried. "I wanna go home." I ran to Daryl tightly hugging him, he hugged me back and held me. I just cried into his shoulder.

"Shh." Daryl tried to sooth me. "It's okay. We'll go back. We will." He reassured me.

And just like that…I felt better than I have this whole time.

Hey everyone! So what do you think? Is Abby pregnant? Is going back to the community a good thing? Will they even make it back? Will Abby and Rick ever reconcile? Keep reading to find out. In the meantime, please review and let me know what you think! :)