Journal Entry

One of the things I'm supposed to do with this journal is note what I'm feeling. That is simple-God, I'm bored. I''m bored with the ranch, with making money, with dealing with the voting block, the orchards the on and on and on and on! I feel like I've been doing the exact same thing my whole life. In fact, I HAVE done the exact same thing my whole life come to think of it. Only time I did anything different was when I was in the army and even then I spent half my time chasing strays. Boys in this case, not cattle but still strays.

One thing I did like about being in the army is that no one really knew much about me. I mean, they might know my parents were ranchers or that I was from California, but other than that there weren't a whole lot of people eyeballing me because I was Tom Barkley's son or Jarrod Barkley's brother and 'let's see if he falls on his butt kind of thing. 'Cause God knows if I screwed up in Stockton someone was always ready to run to Mother or Father with the information. Sometimes the news of whatever I'd done would get home before I did and then I'd likely catch hell.

No wonder bugs under a microscope burn to a crisp.

Bvbvbvbvbvbvbv

Victoria was worried about Nick. Not in a "Does he have a fever?" kind of way or "He's been far too quiet for too long" kind of way. She was concerned about Nick because he seemed, well, UnNickish if you will. Everything that needed to get done on the ranch and other holdings got done, nothing was out of repair, or missing or otherwise ignored, it was just that Nick seemed to sleepwalk through his day, doing things automatically and completely without enthusiasm. It was the last that truly bothered her because Nick, no matter what else was going on, had boundless enthusiasm for the ranch and yet over the last few months it had completely drained away.

Just how apathetic he had become was drilled into her when she noticed a letter from Bank Loan Agent Bertram Nutters sitting on the study desk, politely asking Nick for a summary of operating expenses incurred paid for the last fiscal year sitting next to a draft of a response from Nick that said only. "It's the same as last year. Stop bothering me." Which is NOT how you want to address your banker unless you were attempting to solicit an audit.

The last time Nick had encountered Bertram Nutters you would have thought the man was his best friend. That memory had always maintained a piercing quality in her mind because of just how thoroughly Nick had demolished the poor man's dedication to his job.

The Barkley's had an opportunity to double their timber holdings but to do it they needed capital now. They could raise it if on their own but it would take around a month to do so and they needed it within half that time, so they were, in a rare move, taking out a loan. Normally it wouldn't be an issue but this was after the whole 'River Monarch' affair and the bank was double checking their investment. So, the bank sent loan officer Bertram Nutters to check the operations, run the books and insure it was a safe loan. He arrived unannounced at the ranch declaring he was there to perform a top to bottom audit of how the ranch operated. Any other rancher in the valley would have been apprehensive. Nick was delighted. This was a chance to show HIS ranch off to someone new, someone who had no idea how ranches worked and would be completely open to the way Nick was running things.

And, since this was Nick, that means Nutters-or Bert as Nick called him-needed to take part in everything: cleaning stalls, roping cattle, branding calves, fixing fences etc. Nutters found himself awakened every morning before dawn and, after an exhausting day of physical activity he just wasn't used to given his rotund appearance, reviewing the books until around midnight every night. The result would have been predictable to anyone but Nick.

Victoria had been distracted by other concerns and didn't actually notice Nutters's precipitous decline until a week had gone by and she arrived at the dinner table to find the man almost collapsed over his plate, hair askew, hands shaking and with a noticeable tic of his left eye which increased when the door was yanked open and Nick leaped into the middle of the room with one bound. His family was so used to his entrances that they wouldn't have paid any attention to it were it not for a whimper from the cringing banker.

"BERT!" Nick bounced over to the balding fellow, bellowing as if he'd just spotted a long lost friend. "There you are! I've been looking all over for you. Where ya' been hidin?" Nick was happily oblivious to just how close to the truth he was.

"..um..."

Victoria felt a pang of pity for the fellow. He hadn't been here a week and Nick had already battered him into speechlessness.

"I have GREAT NEWS!" Nick ramrodded over Bert Nutters's feeble attempts at speech. "Remember asking me about roundups and if we really needed that many men?"

"Um, yes?" Nutters sounded apprehensive.

"You're gonna get a chance to find out for yourself! We're going to have a roundup! Isn't that great?"

Nutters was horrified. "But..but you said there wasn't going to be one!" He sounded close to tears.

"I decided we need to give the east section a rest. We're moving the entire herd to the west section of the ranch. It should take about two days, you're gonna love it!"

Nutters was staring at Nick with the fearful fascination one would devote to observing the demented.

Victoria understood completely. Nick loved the ranch, absolutely loved it and nothing made him as happy as having a chance to show it to people. Problem was, Nick got so wrapped up in his own enthusiasm that he assumed that every else felt the same way. She didn't doubt for a second that Nick sincerely believed Nutters was having a grand time and the man's bouts of stuttering were the result of overwhelming joy. It was times that like this that Victoria was irresistibly reminded of an over sized puppy ecstatically bounding around a room oblivious to the fact that he was leaving muddy footprints on everyone and knocking antiques off tables with a single sweep of a wagging tail.

One of the wranglers appeared at the dining room door.

"Boss? Looks like that mare's going to foal."

"I'll be right out!" Nick bellowed back. "Bert, ya wanna come see?"

Nutters shook his head frantically, clinging to the table with white knuckled intensity as if he feared Nick was going to seize him by the leg and drag him behind. Victoria decided to rescue the man.

"Actually, Nick he hasn't had a chance to eat. Maybe he can be out a little bit later?"

"Oh." Nick looked disappointed, then brightened up after a moment. "Maybe I can come get you when it's a little further along. If this is your first live birthing, you're in for a treat!"

Nutters turned a distinct shade of green and swallowed audibly as Nick bounded out of the room with even more energy than he'd shown coming in. The amazing thing, Victoria thought, was that it had already been a 14 hour day.

Nutters waited until the front door slammed and wheeled on Victoria with a desperate look in his eyes.

"You have to help me." He begged. "Can't you see what that madman is doing to me?"

Victoria wondered if there was a diplomatic way of pointing out that the "madman" in question was her son, then decided not to bother. "Mr Nutters, try to understand that Nick wants to show you every part of the family operations-"

"Operations? You mean there's more?" Nutters looked absolutely horrified.

"Well, there's the cattle ranching, the apple orchid, the peach orchid, the orange orchids, the mining holdings, the foresting camps, the..."

"He'll kill me!" The auditor wailed.

"Well," Victoria bit her tongue on her first response of "Not on purpose."

Nutters turned to Jarrod with a look of utter desperation. "Can't you summarize the finances?

"You mean the holdings, the manpower, the expenses, everything for the last five years?"

"Just summarize it...write up a brief outlining everything. I'll approve it."

Jarrod thought about it for a moment. "I can write it up with Nick and have it ready in a day or two. You can take it with you."

"Mail it." Nutters slid a business card across the table. "Do you have a back entrance I can leave through?" He dropped his voice to a whisper, like an escaping prisoner trying not to be overheard. "I don't want him to see me."

Victoria wondered what he thought would happen if Nick saw him depart. Did he expect Nick to chase him down, rope him and hogtie him while cackling 'Not until the round up Bert! Not until the round up!'

"If you want to go through the kitchen I can have your carriage brought around."

Nutters leaped to his feet and bolted towards the kitchen, almost colliding with Silas.

"What about your suitcase?" Victoria called.

"Forget it Lady, I can't wait!" The banker disappeared through the doorway with impressive speed, given how tired he had been a few minutes before.

Victoria had sighed, realizing that one problem, the bank agent, had been solved only to be replaced by another:

Nick would be very disappointed when he discovered his good friend Bert had left without a goodbye.

The difference between the Nick of a few years ago and the unenthusiastic, distracted son of the last few months distressed her greatly and she didn't have the faintest idea what was wrong.