Silas washed the dishes methodically, trying to figure out what to cook for dinner. Some meals he planned far in advance, sometimes he simply looked around the kitchen for what was available and went from there. Some things were a given. Bread was a daily part of each meal, as were at least two vegetables. The tricky part was the meat course. It wouldn't do to make the same dish twice in one week; he had too much self-respect for that. He also had to take into account which family members were in town and which ones were not so he didn't make someone's favorite while they were away and so on and so on and so on. Periodically he had to adjust to account for unexpected events, such as the fish that currently were splashing in a bucket, unaware of their dismal fate.

Since fish was on the menu, he had to prepare a third vegetable dish, just in case Victoria Barkley decided to pass on the meat dish. Little adjustments like that were such a part of his daily routine he didn't even thing about it anymore. Things he did keep an eye on included Mr Nick's current habit of coming in after meals and, if Angela was washing dishes, immediately taking over the drying. Silas had hoped the relationship would fizzle by now but it showed no signs of doing so, much to his displeasure.

The only thing he could say in favor of the romance is that it hadn't turned into a physical one as far as he could tell. It may have been unfair of him, but he wouldn't have credited Nick with that level of self-restraint. Then again, Nick was full of surprises lately, including his abrupt arrival in the kitchen at this odd hour. Normally he would be out tending the ranch, but he simply showed up in the kitchen with a large rolled up sheet of paper in his hands.

"Do you remember saying if I could come up with a solution, you'd listen?"

Silas nodded warily. Nick unrolled the paper, revealing a large map, and pointed to a specific spot.

"There."

BVBVBVBVBVBV

"Mr Barkley?"

Jarrod looked up from and appellate decision he was reviewing to see his secretary standing in the doorway and felt a pang of annoyance.

"I'm in the middle of something, right now."

""It's just that your brothers are here. Do you want to see them or should I tell them you're busy?"

Jarrod was startled. Family members didn't usually bother him at work. They respected it as his workplace and generally waited until he was home if they had questions or problems about the family business, so this must be pretty important.

"Go ahead and send them in."

Nick and Heath came into the office, Heath taking a seat immediately while Nick characteristically stayed on his feet and fidgeted with the hat in his hands.

"Hello, Brothers of mine. What can I help you with?"

Heath shrugged. "Don't ask me. Nick dragged me to this rodeo."

"Brother Nick?"

Nick chewed on the inside of his cheek for a moment. "I'm not sure how to put this so I'm just going to be blunt. I'm leaving."

Jarrod wasn't sure he was hearing properly. "What do you mean 'leaving'? Leaving what?"

"Everything. Leaving the ranch; leaving the state; leaving the country. I've already bought some property outside of Toronto, Canada. It's big enough to raise a good size herd and start my own ranch."

Heath looked at dumbfounded as Jarrod felt. This was entirely understandable as it had not occurred to either man that Nick might be thinking of leaving. Both were aware Nick had been unhappy this year, but with the recent repair of the relationship between Jarrod and Nick, the dissatisfaction had seemingly dissipated. Heath had been aware Nick still seemed somewhat absent minded, as if he was only party interested in the ranch, but the very idea that Nick would be planning to leave had not-could not-be considered by either one of the Barkley brothers.

"When did you start thinking of leaving the ranch?" Jarrod struggled to focus his finely tuned attorney trained mind on the conversation.

"Couple of weeks after Doc Marten died." Came the quick response. "Silas pointed out some things that made me realize I couldn't stay here if I wanted to get married."

"Married? Who do you want to marry?" If Jarrod had been perched on the upper deck of a boat that suddenly and without warning decided to wallow on its side, he couldn't have been more off balance.

Abruptly a light flicked on in Heath's eyes as if a missing piece of a jigsaw puzzle suddenly fit into place. "Angela." He said.

Nick nodded. "Angela."

Scratch the previous comparison; Jarrod's boat turned all the way upside down and dove to the bottom of the ocean floor.

"J-Jordan's Angela?" He croaked. What on earth...? When did Nick and Angela start spending any time together? How had they managed to spend any time together without anyone noticing? Or at least none of the Barkley's noticing; plainly Silas was aware of the relationship.

"We have a limited number of 'Angelas' on the ranch, Jarrod." Nick pointed out gently.

"How..? When did you start spending time with Angela?"

"After Doc Marten was murdered. I was falling apart and telling her how he had been helping me figure things out, helping learn how to do things differently. I felt like I didn't have enough strength to keep going, so, she gave me hers. That's when I realized, she was the more amazing than woman I had ever met, ever courted, ever danced with. That all those other girls were like ...a star next to the sun. That I could tell her anything and she wouldn't turn away, wouldn't be disgusted or ...that she loved me. Me, not Nick Barkley. Nick Barkley was just a name to her."

Jarrod's head was absolutely whirling. He literally felt dizzy and could feel himself clutching to the desk for balance. This was too much at one time. Nick had fallen in love with a freed slave, courted her, decided to marry her, leave the ranch and move to Canada? And he had presented this to Jarrod in less than two minutes?

"Nick, you can't just up and leave!" Jarrod protested.

"Yes Jarrod, I can." Nick was still speaking in that maddeningly gentle voice. "The ranch doesn't need me; Heath can run it for the family. And Heath is better at the mining business than I'll ever be."

Heath looked flushed with pleasure at the statement.

"So, you're going to pack up and leave? Head off to Canada, just like that?"

"I have to." Nick said quietly. "Jarrod, I can't stay here and marry Angela. I can't find anyone in Stockton, or in this valley, I can't find anyone in this state that will marry us and you know it. We can't get married and stay in this country. The civil war is too close. There's some hands on the ranch who would be up in arms if we got married, not that it's anyone else's business."

"And you think highing off to Canada is the answer to everything?"

"No. But Toronto has a large population of freedmen; it's a much more...tolerant place. It will give us a chance to be together."

Jarrod closed his eyes for a moment. "It's not going to work out." He said flatly. "Not because you don't love her or she doesn't love you. It's not going to work because everywhere you go there are going to be people and some of those people are going to be bigots. They're not only going to object to your marriage, they're going to be offended by it. They're going to do everything they can to break you up."

Nick nodded slowly. "They probably will. But I'm not giving up Angela and Jordan. I won't do it. It's not up for discussion Jarrod." He added gently as Jarrod started to object again.

Jarrod stewed silently for a moment. "Then why are even bothering to tell me? Why not just announce it at the business meeting next week?"

Nick smiled slightly. "Voting block, remember?"

bvbvvbvb

"Mr Barkley?"

"Hmm?"

"Mr Barkley?"

"Oh yes, go ahead."

"Mr Barkley!" His secretary's obvious annoyance finally pierced Jarrod's distracted mind.

"Yes, Christine?"

"You wanted me to tell you when the Riley papers arrived."

"Oh yes, thank you. Just put them on my desk please." Jarrod gestured vaguely at a corner of the desktop, completely uninterested in the court decision that had seemed so important yesterday. He needed to focus on his current cases but Nick, with his announcement yesterday had thrown Jarrod's concentration out of whack.

Jarrod drummed the desk with his fingers. Nick was in love with Angela. Wonderful. Just wonderful. An entire valley, no, an entire STATE full of women to fall in love with and he had to pick the single person who would never, ever be acceptable to anyone else, Jarrod didn't care where Nick went. The pair could go to the moon and there would probably be someone to offend parked there. The only place the couple would be accepted, he thought, is the ranch. And that was if they never left the house to interact with the wranglers, many of whom were from the south.

It would be so much easier, he thought, if I could hate her.

Unfortunately, he couldn't. She was intelligent, gentle, kind, beautiful…everything one could want in a wife except she was a negro. Jarrod scowled. He had no objection to her race; if Victoria and Tom had allowed him cling to prejudices, which they hadn't, having command in a unit of ex-slaves would have knocked it out of him. His soldiers were brave, disciplined and subjected to every form of abuse imaginable. He had watched his unit spend 20 hours straight putting out flames in a damaged Kansas town, only to have his troopers spit on by the townsfolk as they marched away.

Incidents like this had left him with the weary certainty that people would always find a reason to despise the freedmen. He didn't want this life for his brother; but this is what Nick faced if he married Angela. Jarrod sighed. He was also bothered by Nick's certainty that he would get no real support from his family.

"The voting block." Nick had said. He had carefully planned who and how to break this news to. He had already taken steps towards the move to Canada; Jarrod had discovered this when he went to the bank this morning that Nick had been working on the land acquisition for awhile. Plainly Nick was prepared for the family to react badly. Jarrod would have been angry were it not for the fact that the rift between Nick and family had only recently started healing. What really upset him right now was the feeling that he had finally reached point of trust with Nick again, only to have his brother leave.

Jarrod hated the idea he would never be able to show Nick that he would support him no matter what; that he was afraid and angry because he was frightened for his sibling and not because he objected to his choice of wife. He wanted Nick to be happy. He wanted Nick's wife and children to be happy and healthy and all the things Nick ached for but it was never going to happen; not anywhere. Jarrod wished he could explain that.

Glumly Jarrod realized his reaction yesterday might keep anything he said from seeming sincere; how to remedy that he had no idea. Jarrod started to twist his ring, another nervous habit he generally suppressed; never give the opposing attorney an edge. He had spent hours in law school sitting in one spot refusing to move a muscle and telling himself over and over "Don't twist the ring. Don't twist the ring." And now look at him; he'd gone right back to fussing with the ring. The ring.

The Ring

Jarrod opened his desk drawer and sorted through the pencils, erasers and other debris of an attorney before he found the box. He opened it and studied it carefully. It was the ring he had given Beth. He had kept it after her death; they had never even had a photo taken together and he wanted something of their brief, doomed marriage. If he'd had the time, he would have commissioned one especially for her. Since the marriage had been so hasty, he'd bought one from a jewelry store. He'd thought it was beautiful, though. It wasn't the flashiest ring or the largest diamond, but It had a quiet grace and elegance that fit Beth so perfectly that he'd had to have it.

He ran his fingers over it, remembering all the hope it had carried, all the joy it had promised. He had wondered once if he would ever give it to someone else, before silently pledging he wouldn't place it on another woman's finger. If he ever felt that way about someone again, then both Beth and the unknown girl deserved better. It didn't have to go unused though. He doubted Nick had bought a ring for Angela yet; this would be Jarrod's gift to them both. He hoped it would say everything he couldn't.

"Christine, I'm leaving early today."