CHAPTER 8 – Almost Fireworks

Author's Note: I had intended that this chapter be the one in which the final scene of Emotion Sickness was recreated, with my own twists. However, the build-up in this chapter to that scene, and the simultaneous activities in Drakken's lair, were already running at 4,500 words so I have decided to leave the fireworks to the next chapter.

Middleton Days Parade

With fairground music ringing in their ears, Kim and Ron (sans Rufus who had been left in the care of the Possibles that evening) stopped in front of a coconut shy that had been set up opposite Bueno Nacho, and was manned by a young man. "Hey, Ned. Nice neckwear," Ron hailed his former boss and, briefly, subordinate with enthusiasm. The young man was never going to make much of himself beyond managing the local Bueno Nacho but Ron could relate to that – Smarty Mart's pet department head was about the limit of his own aspirations. And Ned always made sure that Ron got the bendy straw with his soda.

"Hi Ron, hi Kim." Ned was wearing round black glasses and a clip-on yellow tie that perfectly mismatched his purple shirt. Kim pulled a face that neither of her male companions noticed. "Ron, you should have a go at the shy." Ned pointed to a stuffed teddy sitting on the back shelf. "You can win your lady something to cuddle when you're not around." Ron was startled – word had spread fast about the upgrading of his relationship with Kim.

"Actually, Kim doesn't need one, she already has a Pa … Yow!" he yelped in pain as a furious redhead punched him on the arm. "Oops, sorry Kim," he apologized as he wilted in her glare, rubbing his shoulder. She relented and smiled sweetly. "Okay, lover boy, you can win me a teddy." Ron turned to Ned and nodded, fishing out some notes from his pocket and passing them over. Ned handed him three small firm, dimpled balls. "Knock down one coconut and you get to take it home. Knock down two and you get the bear."

Ron gave two balls to Kim and swung his injured arm up and down to loosen the muscle, then turned to face the rightmost nut. "You are so going down," he threatened the inanimate object. His arm swung back then flipped forward like a whiplash, releasing the projectile at full stretch, which hit the nut square on, tumbling it from its perch and cracking it open. "Coolio," the boy exclaimed. There was scattered applause from the onlookers, and Kim gave her boyfriend a startled look before kissing him on the cheek. Ned looked shocked at the ferocity of the throw. "Hey, man," he addressed Ron. "You should try out for the MHS baseball team."

Ron hadn't considered that before. His ambitions thus far didn't stretch beyond the school football team mascot. But maybe Ned had something here?

Kim passed a second ball to Ron, who wound his arm up again and let fly at the center coconut. He again hit the nut but his aim was not quite true, and though the coconut cracked a little it didn't fall. With a determined expression, Ron took the final ball and hurled it at the weakened coconut. The top half of the nut shattered, but the bottom half did not budge.

"Hey," Ron complained. "What's wrong with that coconut?" A bystander called out "Bet it's been glued in!" Ned scowled at the speaker. "No it's not – are you calling me a cheat?"

Kim stepped forward. "Ned, did you set this stall up?" "No," the young man explained. "I am just looking after the shy for the stallholder – said he'd be back in ten minutes but that was an hour ago." She looked him in the eye. "It's not your fault but I think they're right." She climbed into the stall and grabbed hold of the remainder of the coconut. It refused to move, and at closer quarters she could see that the base of the coconut was adhering to the stand.

"Ron won fair and square," she told Ned. "Give him the bear." When did he get so good at throwing?

The BN employee looked furtive. "I can't, Kim. Mr. Killigan will kill me. He said that no-one could win the bear."

"Killigan?" Ron and Kim spoke simultaneously, so shocked that neither thought to claim a jinx.

"Those balls – they were golf balls, weren't they?" Kim realized. She and Ron looked around, hoping to spot the bearded Scottish golfer and half-expecting to hear a burst of bagpipes accompanying an exploding golf ball.

They were interrupted by a Beep Beep Be-Beep.Kim looked at Ron, who remembered that he was carrying the Kimmunicator as she had nowhere to conceal it in her outfit. Hastily he pulled it out of his trouser pocket and handed it to her. Wade was already speaking. "Kim, Duff Killigan has been spotted heading for Middleton. Carrying coconuts, would you believe?"

"We know, Wade. He's here alrea ..." A burst of static interrupted the connection.

"There's that snow again," Ron complained. "Can't you do something about your line, Wade?"

The screen broke up for a moment and then the image of Wade reappeared. "… checked my system, there's nothing going on here. Kim, after this call, leave your Kimmunicator on stand-by. I'm going to access the scanner and see if there's anything at your end." She nodded.

"What about Killigan?" Ron ventured. He was used to evenings being ruined by some crazy villain, but must it be tonight?

Kim considered her date, his face reflecting his reluctance, and came to a decision. She also wanted to spend some quality time with him. "Wade," she spoke into the Kimmunicator. She outlined what had just happened, then continued. "Unless you or GJ have any intel about a major heist, I'm gonna assume that he's just here to fleece some marks. Let the local police deal with him and we'll take a night off."

Wade looked doubtful. "Duff Killigan is a very dangerous man, Kim." "Despite his comic displays," he thought to himself.

"Yes, but tonight it looks like he's just grifting. Even super-villains get petty."

Wade's response was drowned out by another burst of static. " … careful. I'm going to check the scan now. I have a bad feeling about this interference."

Kim closed the Kimmunicator and handed it back to Ron, indicating that he should place it in his left breast pocket. If Wade wanted to use it as a scanner, it would provide the best coverage from that position. She certainly wasn't going to walk around the fair waving the device around. She took Ron's arm and they walked away from the shy towards the gathering of the parade of floats, bear and coconut forgotten as they enjoyed each other's presence.

"Ron," she spoke gently. "Would you mind very much if you just keep on your outfit and forget the pickle costume? Pretty please?" "Why, Kim?" the oblivious beau responded.

"Cos I can't rub my hands over your chest if it's covered in a barrel."

"Boo-yah!"

ooOooOoo

At the other end of Main Street, a blonde and her date were making their way towards the bustle ahead of them. Josh was dressed in a smart blue jacket and matching pants – not his usual attire but he wanted Tara to feel that he had made a real effort for her despite having eschewed fancy dress. The cheerleader by contrast had favored dressing up, wearing a princess dress, fake tiara on her coiffured hair, and carrying a wand in her right hand. Josh thought that she looked pretty stunning in the outfit, which enhanced her natural beauty. By her side, he looked like a prince and the pair received admiring glances from the crowd who accompanied them to the festivities.

Tara caught Josh looking at her, and turned to smile at him. She had been feeling a bit guilty about the signals she had sent him that morning, when she was caught off-guard by Kim and Ron and accepted his date request. But she had to admit that he was behaving like a true gentleman, picking her up from home with a bouquet of flowers for her mother and a small box of chocolates for her. Were it not for the ache in her heart when she thought of Ron, she would be feeling very happy with her choice of date. And the fact that he looked handsome and complemented her choice of outfit so well was not harming his chances. She squared up. "I am going to have a great time tonight," she swore to herself. "And no-one is going to get in the way of that!"

Josh beamed back at his attractive partner. He had no idea what it was that had made her change her mind so abruptly about him but he was determined to make the most of the evening. And having waited all this time for her to say yes to him, he was going to do everything to convince her that she had made the right choice.

Tara's earlier heartbreak had quickly morphed into a feeling of resentment directed at Kim. She was sure that the hero had known about her crush – the look she had seen from Monique in the dining hall had revealed that the dark-skinned girl knew exactly what was going on and if she knew then Kim knew as well. If Kim had been anything of a friend she'd have left a clear field for Tara, but instead she had used her long-standing friendship with the boy to grab him first, after having spent literally years showing no signs of interest. The cheerleader's blood boiled at the thought.

She's the girl who can do anything, including stealing away another girl's crush!

She took Josh by the arm and pulled him unresistingly toward her, her tongue lubricating her upper lip as she did so. If they bumped into the other pair – and she hoped they would – she was going to make Ron realize what he was missing, and majorly tweak his partner at the same time. She'd rub it in with Kim by showing her that she could appreciate a great guy like Josh even if the redhead had been unable to hold him. Tara gave Josh a smile that promised more to come, tugging him along as they headed for where the floats were gathering for the parade.

Josh saw the invitation in her face and a warm flush went through him. Tonight was looking more interesting with every step they took. He was rather hoping that they would bump into Kim – he wanted to show her that he had moved on. And Tara looked like she was in the mood for more than just a chaste stroll.

As Ron Stoppable would say, "Boo-yah!"

ooOooOoo

Shego watched the hero pair from a safe distance as they spoke to Wade. She was intrigued by the communication problems they were having and resolved to find out more about that. Advantage could definitely be had if Team Possible did not have solid comms. We must find a way of separating Possible from Nerdlinger in the heat of battle.

She had also been taken by surprise at the accuracy and power of Ron's throwing. That's something I've not seen before! And judging from the girl's reaction neither had Kim. The way he tossed that first ball, it reminded me of a ninja knife-thrower. Am I getting the feeling that Stoppable has not shared all his secrets with Kimmie? I wonder what else he isn't telling her about? If it's anything like as much as I don't tell Drakken …

The boy is more than just an idiot sidekick, whatever Drakken thinks.

But I have to hand it to Dr. D – he was spot on about spying on the kids. I've already learned stuff that we can use. And there's two more days to go before I head back.

That thought reminded her that she needed to check in with the lair. Retreating into the shadows of the trees lining the main road, she took out the frequency-hopping communicator that Dementor had provided her with before she left, and called the number Manfred had given her, confident that no electronic snooping would reveal her whereabouts or identity.

"Gut morning, Shego." The Security Chief's voice sounded tired and she remembered that it was early the following morning in Tibet.

"Hello, Manfred. Just checking that the arrangements are set for tomorrow?"

"Ja, Shego. Your paperwork has been placed in the school computer. It appears that there is a shortage of teachers so as a substitute you will be welcomed vid open arms. And it seems that teachers don't last long before some accident occurs, so we won't even need to explain your abrupt departure after two days."

"Thanks, Manfred. You and your team have worked fast." She had barely had time to brief them before taking off from the lair.

"Zank you." The voice at the other end was enthusiastic. "Oh, and the wig and skin make-up will be waiting at your hotel when you awake."

"Excellent. And what is to be my cover name?"

"You will be Sheila Goh. A nice touch don't you think? No doubt the kids will call you 'Miss Go'."

"Oh, and a message from Doctor Drakken. He reminds you not to interfere with Team Possible under any circumstances. This is strictly a reconnaissance mission."

Yes, boss, I got that. I'm not stupid! Though the thought of failing Miss 4.8 Grade Average on an honors test while she was at the school was sorely tempting.

"It all sounds very efficient. Over and out." She replaced the communicator in the pocket of her costume and turned to face the street again.

Her attention was caught by a striking pair approaching from the other end of the street. "Pretty girl and cute boy," she thought to herself. "If I wasn't on a mission, I'd be tempted to have a piece of that stud. I might even let her watch!"

She paused her recording as she watched the two couples approaching each other. The new pair had spotted Team Possible and were walking toward them. Shego noticed that the girl's face was tight as she observed the teen hero pull her partner towards her and tilt her head up for a kiss. The dark-haired villain watched silently as the blonde turned to her partner and pulled him into a fervent clinch, not releasing him until the redhead and the blond had parted and were staring at the new arrivals. The reactions of all four were priceless but she could not help observing a look of sadness in the eyes of Stoppable as he looked at the blonde girl that was missed by everyone else present.

Ooh, rivalry and jealousy! Middleton's very own 'Agony County'. This could be very interesting! 'Miss Go' simply must get to the bottom of this!

She grinned at the scene in front of her as she continued to dictate notes to herself.

As the sidekick would say, "Boo-yah!"

Drakken's Lair – earlier the same day

Professor Dementor looked up as the key turned in the lock and Drakken walked into his laboratory. Dementor was still not trusted enough by the blue-skinned villain to roam freely around the lair, but he had been given access to his equipment, and the door lock was in reality easily overcome – Drakken wanted to make a point that Dementor still had to earn his full freedom.

Foregoing pleasantries, Drakken demanded, "I want to know about the experiments and devices you have in this lair. And your plans. From now on, nothing is to be a secret to me."

Dementor stared at the new arrival with mixed feelings. On the one hand, his rational mind reminded him that two heads were better than one, and despite his public disrespecting of Drakken he recognized that the blue-skinned villain had produced some excellent ideas in the past, even though he never was able to see them through. Furthermore, whatever this Phoebus device was that Drakken said he had been exposed to, it had clearly made him a much more formidable opponent. His rapid takeover of Dementor's own lair and the suborning of his own henchmen was sufficient evidence of that.

On the other hand, he felt deeply insulted that Drakken of all people had had the audacity to steal his lair and its secrets away from him, the genius Professor Dementor. Who was it who stole the PDVI before Drakken could? And who had tricked Team Possible into doing his thieving for him? And had a spy in the heart of HenchCo?

Maybe he, Dementor, could also make use of the Mark 2 device he was currently building for Drakken? And turn the tables on the upstart. But for now he would play along with Drakken and bide his time. He would share part of his plan with Drakken and get his assistance to complete it. And when the time was ripe, he would regain control of his lair and execute the full plan himself. If Drakken went along, fine. If he didn't, then too bad for him. And there could be only one ruler of the world.

The Professor went to his desk and took out a manifest which he silently handed to Drakken. The scientist scanned the list of current projects before turning to his subordinate.

"Tell me about this JT-3."

ooOooOoo

Manfred inspected the modifications that his team had made to the ventilation shafts and nodded in satisfaction to the foreman. Drakken had told him that Team Possible frequently used the shafts as an access to his lairs, and he wanted a way of stopping them. Manfred had decided on three levels of protection. First, he had embedded some fiber-optic cables into the shafts that would provide a video feed of the interior. Second, he had installed a McHenry laser net halfway along the main shaft that would sound an alarm even if the video feed was overlooked. Third, he had electrified the grid at the lair-end of the shaft. Anyone attempting to open the grid from the inside would receive a stun-level shock.

He could have ramped up the power to the lasers and the grid to a lethal level, but Manfred, despite his intimidating appearance, was not a murderer and he saw his job as to stop intruders not kill them. He had insisted on that being written into his contract with HenchCo and Professor Dementor. Manfred and his team would happily inflict pain and injury on his boss' behalf, but a hired hand had to protect his own interests and his legal expenses insurance did not cover homicide.

Arriving at the lair some weeks earlier, Manfred had been shocked to learn of the death of a contractor by Zyklon B and, unknown to Dementor, had disconnected the poison gas feed to the main entrance to avoid further "accidents". He saw no reason to change his stance under the new management. Everyone knew that Drakken talked big but was actually quite squeamish, and world domination, not blood on his hands, was his modus operandi. There was a very good reason why no-one had actually come to any harm in his so-called death traps. He did have his doubts about Shego though – that plasma of hers looked as if it could be lethal and it was the potential threat she posed that had persuaded him to throw his lot in with Drakken. He would have to keep an eye on her. A smile crossed his face at the thought of keeping a particularly close and personal eye on the bodacious babe when she returned from her scouting mission.

No, Manfred was satisfied that the lair was entirely secure with the protections he now had in place.

He was very comfortable working for Drakken. Whilst he retained the same doubts about his new boss' ultimate success as of his former boss, he appreciated the more business-like approach that Drakken had brought to the lair. Having disconnected the self-destruct mechanism and now secured the ventilation shafts, he was able to look back on the previous set-up and wonder how none of them had previously spotted the pattern of Team Possible's ingresses and the idiocy of a self-destruct button in full view.

Like the henchmen who he commanded, Manfred cared little for his employer's goals. Had he thought about it, a world dominated by Dementor or even the newly-competent Drakken would have had little appeal to him. The problem with all the villains that he had been allocated to over the years was that they never had any idea of what they were going to do when (if!) they actually succeeded in their latest nefarious plan. Everything was in the take-over plan, and no thought given to the long years that would follow. Still, he was focused on the here and now and he would, the mercenary that he was, take whatever he could get and let the future take care of itself.

OoooOoooo

"Tell me about this JT-3."

"Smart man!" Dementor thought. "He's picked up on the most important project on my books."

He gave Drakken his full attention.

"JT-3 is a substance originally synthesized by ze Chinese military. Zey ver seeking to create a – for want of a better phrase – 'controllable blob' by combining programmable nanites with a special gelatin. Zey partially succeeded but did not bargain for its ability to grow without limit, absorbing everything in its path. Only a magnetic bottle could contain the substance. After a manufacturing facility disappeared off the map following an accident ze Chinese discontinued production. It took a fuel-air bomb to cleanse the site.

Only two magnetic bottle canisters containing ze substance ever existed outside ze plant. Ze second was obtained by my agents at great risk and expense from General Wu in Shanghai last month. Ze first was stolen from the plant and inadvertently released into the wild from a train last year. Ze cause of ze release was your unintended actions, Dr Drakken."

Drakken looked stunned at the last revelation. The only time he had been any way near a train this last year had been on Mother's Day. A dawning realization filled his mind.

Dementor continued, pleased with the effect of his words. "Only ze prompt actions of Frau Possible prevented a disaster of epic proportions, not to mention ze demise of her daughter. She vos able to interrupt the nanites with a simulated brain signal, but at ze price of destroying the substance's power. Vhat was left vas an inert mass of gelatin."

"'Self-replicating synthoplasm'," Drakken breathed as the events of that day came flooding back. "I never did figure out what the stuff actually was. I just knew that it was well-protected so steal-worthy. Shego called me on that at the time."

The pint-sized villain's eyes gleamed.

"As far as ze Chinese, Global Justice and everyone else are concerned, JT-3 no longer exists. And if it does, it has no practical value. Any use of the substance to absorb enemy facilities vould require the ability to control and stabilize it. And no-one knows how to stabilize it outside a containment vessel."

He looked proudly at Drakken. "No-one that is, except me. I and I alone, have found a way to stabilize JT-3. Ze material is self-replicating, so I have already been able to produce several hundred gallons of the material. Viz this we can literally swallow up ze enemy installations."

"Interesting, Professor," Drakken mused. "This could certainly be a fearsome weapon to deploy against Global Justice." Though I can already see some major flaws in your plan. How to deliver the payload to the target for one. But I sense some other possibilities for this substance.

Drakken stepped away and turned to walk towards the bench where a variety of gadgets were in various states of dismantlement. He pointed to one. "So this is my new Phoebus?" he asked. Dementer nodded. "Excellent. Now tell me more about the EMA …"

ooOooOoo

Dr. Drakken emerged from Dementer's lab, ideas buzzing in his head. He had been amazed at the changes that the exposure to the original Phoebus device had brought about, and which tomorrow's application would make permanent. Things just seemed clearer. He was able to look back at his career to date and begin to understand why everything had always gone wrong, how the teen do-gooders had always managed to thwart his plans.

Shego is right. I never expect them. Why?

Every time it's so predictable. They burst in. I gloat and give away my plan. They distract me. They destroy my latest weapon. They blow up my lair. Then they go away, laughing at me!

I must look like a pathetic loser to everyone, especially those darn kids!

Even Shego doesn't give me the respect I crave for. But can I really blame her?

Why couldn't I see this before? Did it really have to take a machine to show me what I've been doing wrong all these years?

He felt a growing sense of anger as he thought back on his past humiliations.

The lava that was supposed to destroy Wisconsin? Foiled by forgetting about that stupid naked mole-rat.

The neuro-compliance chip which would have made Kim Possible my slave if I hadn't neglected to check on her brothers.

My weather machine that would have given me Canada if only I hadn't got over-confident again.

My embarrassment spray, which would have disappeared Possible if I hadn't forgotten about Stoppable.

The common factor? Inadequate planning. Not taking all the factors into account. Underestimating Team Possible.

No wonder they laugh at me. I'd laugh at me!

He sat down and closed his eyes as he felt the onset of a pounding headache. He was surprised to see his mother standing in front of him. She was looking furious as she raised a finger and pointed at him. He shrank back, thumb aimed at his mouth before he stopped himself.

Drewbie, they laugh at you behind your back every time they leave your lair. I thought you were a man!

His face crumpled.

Listen to them. Listen to their taunts. Watch them banter. See how they mock you. They have no respect for you. None!

He could hear their glee as they recounted to each other another incident where they wrecked his plans. He could see the smug smile on Possible's face as she slipped into yet another supposedly impregnable lair. And the look of almost-pity from Stoppable – Stoppable! – as he hit the lair destruct button for the umpteenth time and ended yet another dream.

How could you let yourself be defeated by a cheerleader and a buffoon? How?

"It won't happen again, mother. I promise. I swear I'll .."

You're a pathetic excuse for a son!

A sob forced its way into the open.

Make me proud of you, Drewbie. If you can.

"I can, mother. I'll make you proud of me. I will, I will."

He was on his knees before her, tears running down his face.

A look of skepticism passed across his mother's face.

And then she vanished.

Dr. Drakken opened his eyes, moist with tears, and shivered despite the heat.