"It's weird," She thought Maggie watching the big bad Volturi behave like normal people.
Marcus and Aro were right in the window and were discussing the last threat, Tanya Denali, sitting on the knees of her boyfriend. Felix Volturi.
Maggie was happy for her friend found her mate even in a Volturi but she could judge because she was in the same boat.
Alec was on the floor with the mobile in his hand. Maggie looked at Jane and Aston. Aston sat with one hand holding his book, the other resting behind Jane's back. Jane sat presses closely against Aston. Jane held her phone in one hand while the other fidgeted with a few loose strands of Aston's hair.
She was blinded by envy. Scorching hot envy. Jealousy had slithered into her veins like a venomous snake, filling her heart with wants this. She wants a man to treat her like a queen. To love her. Words like marriage, and love, and forever. Proposals and promises swore in the heat of passion with desperation and reverence.
Maggie watched from across the room as Demetri laughed at one of Jasper's stories from the war.
Maggie had it bad for Demetri Volturi. She'd had it bad for Demetri for a while now.
Demetri was beautiful, and Maggie didn't mean that in the physical sense (though Demetri was, kind of, ridiculously pretty).
Demetri was kind.
Demetri was sweet.
Demetri was caring.
"Hello love, "said a charming voice and Maggie blinked. In front of her was Demetri Volturi.
Demetri smirks and lifts his hand to her cheek." Is everything ok?"
"Yes," she nods at him and thanked the God that was a vampire. Because she would be red as a tomato." I just thinking where are they the other female Volturi"
" Shopping"
"They went shopping?" Maggie asked. Did they go shopping? The deadly vampires went clothes shopping? That's almost too girly.
"Yes love, is that alright?" he asked politely and astonished at her reaction.
"Maggie?"
She twitched in surprise as she heard Demetri's voice, and she lifted her head.
" I am afraid "
"I don't know how to make you happy or feel loved. I'm not that kind of woman that wants flowers and laughing all the time. I have nothing to offer you" She said these words so suddenly, so randomly that Demetri was completely shocked for a whole minute, unable to do anything else but stare at her with wide eyes.
"I don't care about flowers but I will buy you blood bags and I'm not expecting you to laugh every minute. All I care about is your existence. All I need to be happy is you being right beside me." he blurted out, biting his tongue seconds later and asking himself what the hell was wrong with him.
" I can kiss you, Maggie?" his big red eyes sparkled and his smile widened. If Demetri had a tail, it would have been wagging rapidly behind him.
Maggie glared at him, stomp closer and abruptly grabbed Maggie by the collar and slammed their lips together. Teeth and tongues were involved in their hungry lust and love-filled kiss. It felt better than any kiss Maggie had before.
The kisses became more aggressive as Maggie backed him up, till Demetri felt the edge of the chair behind him and he fell on top of it when Maggie pushed him down. He blinked up at the smirking Maggie, still a little dazed from the kiss.
"You can have more than a kiss, Demetri. You're single and available, right?"
"Very," he said breathlessly.
Maggie settled in his lap, kissing him, pressing right into him, letting her hands ghost over every hot-spot.
Demetri's hands were trembling on Maggie's hips, but he could handle it, he could savor it—
" YOU STUPID SPARKY DICK"
Demetri pulled Maggie away as all Volturi almost jumped on their feet but both Cullen and Denali coven witnessed the honest to god fear on their face the moment they had caught sight of her.
As if called, Ursula slammed into the room in a swirl of expensive silk. Maggie glanced up and sighed, envious. For a human, Ursula looked beautiful, every inch the high-born lady- wearing a deep crimson dress with exquisite golden beading, and with her hair in an elaborate twist, held up with sparkling pins. The murderous scowl on her face looked very out of place next to such loveliness.
Sulpicia pulled out her phone as Marcus snickered just loud enough for a human to hear it. "Remind me to replay this later for the rest of Volturi." She told Felix from behind Marcus's back so Ursula wouldn't see it. He didn't think she'd find him so amusing right now.
Demetri chuckled. "This is almost popcorn worthy." He said with a grin meant to antagonize the vampires they were standing in front of.
Felix snorted. "Almost?! It IS popcorn worthy!" He commented before their attention was turned to Caius who had moved towards her.
Caius glares at her as Ursula slowly circles the room not coming closer and not raising her voice.
" You are a fucking idiot"
Ursula kept pushing Caius' buttons, trying to force a reaction out of him, but not seeming to understand that every single one of his threats as empty. He'd never hurt Ursula, he'd never rip her throat out with his teeth or mar that perfect skin. He just didn't know how to tell Ursula that. He'd never particularly wanted to tell Ursula that, because to be completely honest he was scared.
" What the hell is going on?!" Aro asks through gritted teeth, his fists clenching. Ursula vs Caius. The rest of the Volturi members know they should stay quiet. Not when the strongest are about to argue. They laugh internally because a lot of covens thought Marcus and Caius were scariest when angered. How wrong they were.
"She started it!" Caius pointed, his finger half an inch from Ursula's face, who hadn't even stood to defend himself.
"What are you, six?" Ursula's mouth was covered by her hands the second she realized what she'd just said to Caius, but it was too late.
"Have I entered an alternate universe or did you really just crack a smile for me?"
"Shut up," Caius replies, but he's amused.
"Wow," Ursula starts, and her grin is wide and obvious. "Can you laugh, too? Is that even possible?"
Caius makes a noise that is half scoff, but it's half something else, too.
"Aha!" Ursula nudges Caius's shoulder. "Caius Volturi is an actual human or vampire being. I never would've guessed it."
"Ursula," Caius warns.
"Blonde," Ursula dares to tease back.
Caius shoots her a glare.
"Too far?" Ursula asks, bouncing on her toes. Her expression has fallen to that of uncertainty, but as she sees Caius' smile grow wider, she laughs.
Caius laughs, too, his eyes dancing.
Ursula doubts that this isn't an alternate universe.
Caius stood on a balcony looking down at Ursula who was reading hospital's files. Otherwise a grace and beauty to her reading technique that made it look almost look like a dance. It also helped that he also believed that Ursula was one of the most beautiful women that he had ever seen. But he also admired her brilliant mind which he quickly saw when he met her in Paria. It wasn't surprising that he developed an attraction to her even if she turns him down so many times. His attractor wa is so strong that he wanted to make her his queen.
"Everyone is starting to notice your feelings for the doctor, you need to be careful," said Aro as he walked onto the balcony.
" Everyone except her," said Caius as he kept his eyes on Ursula." Volturi should be honored to have her like a queen,"
"They will be, "Aro said with a smirk on his face, "what troubles you, brother?"
"Not a damned thing, Aro. Why do my troubles seem to concern you? I was processing today's events and sorting things in my mind."
"I am just concerned, brother. I have not heard you laugh in some time and wondered what has brought it on. Pray to tell, does it have to do with a certain beautiful human?"
"Aro, do not antagonize him. Let him be as he will work it out!" Marcus told him."Caius, she loves you and will not run. What happened before was no fault of your own. Athenadora could not face you in fear of your wrath. She knew she was wrong and tried to placate the situation in which you had no control. You and Ursula are torn because of your hurt feelings caused by others."
" Athenadora could not face you in fear of your wrath. She knew she was wrong and tried to placate the situation in which you had no control. You and Ursula are torn because of your hurt feelings caused by others."
"You are right Marcus. I fell into a trap laid by Athenodora's treachery and I am trying to prevent that from happening again. And as usual, Aro, you are right in believing that Ursula is perfect for me."
"She's all that and more!" Aro said excitedly. "I have a certain feeling that she will be just what everyone needs around here."
"What do you mean by that?"
He pouted in return. "Brother," he said sternly, "you haven't exactly been the most optimistic as of late."
"Optimistic?"
"Yes exactly! In my opinion—and I don't need to delve into minds to say that the entire guard would agree—you've been perpetually ill-tempered. Moping around, all the scowling, that whining, Honestly, you're like a child!"
"A child, Aro? What is that expression mortals use...? Ah yes. Isn't that the pot accusing the kettle of being black?"
Aro rolled his eyes, leaning over the balcony and watching Ursula "The matter was Ursula and bringing her to that, I would say that if she can revert you back to the way you once were—like the beginning with Athenodora—then the guard won't have to fear your constant wrath. Case in point, brother."
"Perhaps I wish for the guard to fear me."
Smirking, he called out Caius lie. "That would be the same as you saying you wish for Ursula to fear you."
He laughed.
Ursula be scared of him?
Caius had never claimed that he understood women or their actions, and though he knew Ursula Black pretty good in his opinion, she sometimes did things that were surprising him.
She was passionate, aggressive when warranted, kind, smart, could crack a joke and take one, fearless, brave, and beautiful. That had probably been the first thing he noticed about her, and he wouldn't be surprised if she knew he found her attractive after that lame joke he pulled when they first met.
If I had even a slight weakness, it would be her, he thought almost dishearteningly. I hope she doesn't catch onto it.
"I would like to thank you for your advice. Apomorphine was a great idea. You were right." Says the man teasingly as Ursula gives a look.
"When am I not right ?" Ursula asked cheekily. The man scowled at her through the phone and mumbled 'know-it-all' under his breath. Ursula laughed knowing that he was teasing her."I am looking forward to seeing you again"
She hung up and sighed.
Viola hadn't seen him in months. Not since she left. She bumped into him in a bar one evening after a late shift. He asked her to come back to his apartment for a nightcap, seeing as it was close by.
Ursula accepts.
They talk. About everything.
He tells her that he misses her like crazy. Ursula misses him too. Ursula misses him being by her side during cases. Ursula misses his jokes and necessary comments. Jokes and comments she would berate him for but secretly loved.
Loved.
She always knew deep down she loved him. She just never let herself believe it. It would be too complicated, what with him being a doctor and her being the fucking co-worker.
It wasn't complicated anymore though. And they both knew it.
Their first kiss was nothing short of every cliché going. Sparks. Electricity. Fireworks. Every lovelorn glance. Every unsaid "I love you". Every single ounce of passion built up over the years they had known each other. All poured into it.
They can both taste the saline of each other's tears streaming down cheeks and onto lips. Their mouths cling together like they are each other's lifelines.
They make sweet love on his's bed. Never taking their eyes off each other, except for when they are closed as the pleasure builds. Ursula grips his's arms so tight her fingertips whiten. As if when she lets go, he will disappear.
He kisses her with so much desperation, she might combust. The long nights she'd spend thinking about this moment. No dream could compare to the real thing. No fantasy could compare to the feeling she's enveloped with.
The woman sighed and picked a letter up and her name was written out in his handwriting. She contemplated on opening it and reading it now or keep it closed. She decided to read it.
Dear Dr. Black
A smile tugged on her lips at the formal address.
I know I'm the last person you want to hear from but I have so much I want to say to you. After all the things I put you through over the years, I owe you this. I need to do this...for you and for me. Please just at least read it, then you can do with it whatever you want. I just have some things I need to say to you and then I promise you won't hear from me ever again.
Some things are just hard for me to talk about so he thought writing about them might help me. As you can imagine I hated the idea but he said it didn't matter what I wrote so long as I did it. I did write a little but it's not what I wanted to write about. What I really wanted to do was write to you and apologize for everything I did to hurt you. Right now though I'm not sure if I'm going to mail it. I guess we'll find out. There are times I think I'm fucked up beyond repair and after what I did to you, I deserve to suffer. I thought that's how it was supposed to play out, the only way I thought any of us would feel better if I were suffering for the pain I caused you. Nolan, that crazy bastard says I'm wrong. He says that's not how life works, we're not supposed to keep punishing ourselves for our mistakes. We're supposed to learn from them and move on with our lives. Part of this whole healing process is honesty and taking responsibility. While I know this will be painful for you to read, I can't be honest with myself if I can't first be honest with you. This isn't about excuses; this is about me facing the truth and taking responsibility for my actions.
When you were in the hospital, I know that I should have been there to help calm your fears but I was too afraid. I was scared to death that I was going to lose you. I hid from it all, hoping not to feel anything because if I felt it, it would hurt and I couldn't handle that. I couldn't handle the pain. The night before your surgery, I was hiding out at Foreman's apartment. Wilson called and told me the tumors had spread and at that moment I realized you were going to die and it was over. I had to see you but I wanted to numb every feeling I had so I could see you without breaking down. I couldn't face the pain and I didn't want to break down in front of you, I couldn't cry, I couldn't show weakness, I couldn't let my heart be broken by losing you. I couldn't let myself feel what it would be like to lose you, to go through the rest of my life without you. I never realized until that moment just how much I'd depended on you to keep me alive. Wilson was right, I had made your illness all about me. I loved you so much and yet all I could think about was how much it would hurt to live without you. I regret that the one time you needed me, I was too scared to be there without taking a pill to give me the courage. Ursula, I wish we'd talked about this before, it would've saved us so much grief but I have to tell you to know so that you will know the truth. Actually, you knew the truth, it's me who could never face it.
After you ended things between us.
"Enough!" Ursula snapped and stormed out of the gardens. She stalked down the hall, garnering everyone's attention.
She somehow managed to enter her room calmly and close the door, but she was still angry. So angry in fact that she couldn't see straight, she was trembling with rage, and the desire to throw something or someone had never been so strong. Her stomach churned. Adrenaline coursed through her veins, she felt flushed. She took off her jacket, something she never did at work. She couldn't calm down. This was bad, very, very, bad. The last time she was angry she blacked out, and when she found herself again at a tough surgery with a lot of blood over her.
Ursula wanted to run. She wanted to scream. She wanted to break something. She wanted a drink. Yes, that's what she needed, a drink. Something to calm her nerves. She poured herself a scotch, gulping the first one down without even thinking about it. The second was smoother, yes, now she was relaxing. Se sat back and breathed in slowly. In her nose, out of her mouth.
She must have drifted off because by the time she opened her eyes it was almost nine in the evening. He looked out the window, all black.
A soft knock on the door surprised her. She backed away from the door. The knock came again and the door creaked open.
It was Gianna.
" Finally, you are up! Master Caius has told me to buy you some Vicodin" She grinned ear to ear. "You had a call from a doctor named Grey. You have a date with an at Velestino in two hours ." The secretary was exuberant.
"Well..." Ursula trailed off unsure how to proceed. "Thank about the pills and good to see you"
Gianna chucked. " You, the greatest misanthrope in the world is happy to see me"
" I was talking to the pills. Now, give me the bottle "Ursula said more impatiently. Gianna rolled her eyes.
The doctor thanked Gianna and close the door. She tried to walk but her leg was hurting again, so he took off his pants and massaged his leg. Taking a mixture of drugs composing of some pills of painkillers mixed with a couple of Vicodin pills, she closed her eyes as the drugs took effect in her system. The pain on her leg subsided slightly, she relaxed somewhat as beads of sweat studded her brow. Her head felt lighter and she smiled a little.
"Ursula," said Caius walking onto her room. He was looking at a patient's file who Gianna gave him for Ursula as he entered, he did not notice that Ursula was half-naked with her eyes closed, sitting in the dark until she looked up from the file.
Immediately looking away, he apologized, "I'm sorry, I didn't know..."
"Didn't know what? That it was my private reflection period?" Ursula snapped, her eyes still closed and the smile never fading from her lips. She was in every drug addict's heaven, she was getting the high of her life.
"What did you take?" Caius asked. Looking at the empty bottles on the table, and as she examined each one her eyes grew wider and wider.
"You took all of these?"
"Yup," Ursula answered.
"Each, or mixed together?"
"What do you think?"
"I think you're mad."
Ursula laughed. She slowly opened her eyes and stared at Caius, he noticed that her smile was still plastered on her face. And it was turning into a huge grin.
"What?" Caius said, edging away from Ursula.
"You look beautiful today," Ursula said, her grin resembling a Cheshire cat enjoying a sunny Sunday afternoon on a rug by the porch.
Caius fidgeted, "You are high." He put the file on the table.
"No, I am in pain..." She was overwhelmed by a surge of conflicting emotions, she couldn't help but shed another tear or two. "I wake up every morning. I'm in pain. Do you know how many times I wanted to just give up? How many times I thought about ending it ?"
" I am broken "
"Ursula" Caius chuckled and it warmed Ursula like being dunk into a hot tub, warm and relaxing and Ursula felt a little of the tension she had been carrying relax in the set of her stubborn shoulders.
"My dear lad," was spoken again and Ursula tried to sniff inaudibly, eyes still burning. "Come here," It was not a question.
Caius met her half-way and Ursula, with her face still downturned to stare at the stone strewn ground floor, gasped when a large callous hand touched her cheek. Shocked out of her uncharacteristic shyness, her head lifts without resistance when Caius strokes her cheek with a single, scar-ridden thumb.
Caius smiled fondly down at her."You Are Not Broken Nor Do You Need Fixing, Just More Self Love And Acceptance "
"I am right here.