Chapter 16
Amelie was taken to Hawke's estate, she was already a little concerned about Garrett's mother being home, but she couldn't find any excuse not to join him without raising suspicion. She simply hoped that Leandra would be in bed and undisturbed, Amelie couldn't face her right now. Her worries were settled when they entered the building and all seemed relatively calm and quiet. Catherine was already in the study being treated. Orana greeted them at the door happily, but her face fell when she saw the state of the mage. 'Oh maker, not you too!' She said in slight anguish. Amelie gave her a one armed hug in reassurance and watched as Garrett made his way to Catherine's side quickly.
'I'm going to be just fine Orana, thanks for worrying. How's Cat?' Amelie asks as she strokes Jess as she passes. Orana grins and her eyes light up as she does so.
'Just fine! Master Anders is here and healed her in a manner of seconds,' she said gleefully. Amelie stood in a little shock and felt a wave of nausea roll over her. Amelie wasn't looking forward to seeing him again and the madness that hid in his eyes. Orana opened her mouth to say something seeing as the mage had all of a sudden gone very quiet and looked ill.
'Oh, brilliant!' Amelie forced herself to say in fake happiness, 'maybe he wouldn't mind sorting me out either,' she replied with a pained smile which Orana figured was due to her injuries. The young elf nodded and led her to the study shooing Jess away as she bounds up in happiness. Amelie forces her breathing to calm down, she wasn't ready for this, at all. Anders was a painful memory, in her world they were close, she knew things about the mage that he hadn't told anyone before. Not that they would necessarily ring true in this timeline. Amelie had watched at Anders succumbed to his depression and madness, the inner presence that tore at his very sanity. She could only hope that Anders was stronger somehow, that for some reason he was more mentally grounded. Amelie stayed quiet as the study door was opened and she was led inside and placed on a chair. The other mage was standing in front of her, slightly hunched as he worked on Catherine who was lying on the table. Seemed that most of her other wounds had been treated, yet the one on her stomach was taking time and would probably need several treatments.
'Hey Ami,' Catherine murmurs catching her eye as she looks over at her friend. 'You look like shit, just like me,' she half laughs. Anders chuckles as he straightens up, wiping his forehead with his sleeve. He turns around as he runs a cloth over his slightly sticky fingers, allowing Amelie to see him properly. It seemed that he was normal, as far as she could see. But the darkness that haunted him was still there, deep in his core. There were differences that she could see, which made sense seeing as what she knew about Anders in the parallel universe. She hadn't even told Catherine, which was surprising, but she respected Anders' privacy too much. Amelie forced herself to give him a half hearted smile, swallowing any bitterness. She had to remind herself that this Anders was a different person, though they may be common traits.
The healing session was done quickly, it wasn't a full job, she was still going to be a little bruised and red in places, but seeing as he had already spent most his mana on Catherine, Amelie was just glad to be feeling a little better. She made small pleasantries, but Anders made it clear that conversation wasn't necessary. They fell into a comfortable silence, Catherine having fallen into a light snooze. Garrett wandered in and sat by her side, taking her hand lightly in his. Amelie smiled gently at his affection and Anders ignored it, too absorbed in his work. 'Thank you my friend,' Hawke said gently as Anders began to clean up. The mage nodded in response and made a promise to be back at a later time to check up on Catherine. Amelie smiled properly for the first time towards Anders, thankful for his help. He left with little ceremony, making Amelie feel like he had been here many times with Garrett, as reckless as he was. She stood up, still a little tender and silently moved out the room to give her friend and her lover some privacy. Closing the door gently she mentally sighed and rubbed her eyes. Jess slunk up to her and licked her hand, Amelie wore a half smile as she stroked the Mabari around the ears for a moment or two. Orana was waiting patiently.
'Are Lord Hawke and Lady Catherine going to be okay?' The elf asked with a strong undertone of worry.
'Yes, Orana, they'll be just fine, I'm sure they won't mind if you go have a bath and head to bed. It's quite late after all,' Amelie reassured turning to face her and placing a hand on the young woman's shoulder. 'Catherine is resting and Garrett will look after any needs she might have,' she added as the maid wore an expression of doubt.
'You are sure they won't need my assistance?' She said slowly.
Amelie laughed lightly and smiled properly, 'I'm one hundred percent sure, go on. It's been a long night, we could all do with some rest.' Orana held her gaze for a couple of seconds before nodding and sending Amelie a gentle smile, the Mage returned the grin and walked towards the door. 'If there's any trouble, come find me. I'm going home, send Jess and I'll come back,' she says as she waves a goodbye at the elf. The short journey back to the mansion was uneventful and although she still had a slight limp it didn't hinder her too much. Stifling a yawn as she jimmied the door lock open she caught a waft of herself, she stank badly. 'Urgh,' she whispered to no-one as she pulled a face. Dry blood, mud and Maker knows what else was caked onto her clothing. Locking the door again behind her she wandered up the stairs to the bathroom, she peeled the fabric from her skin, throwing it all into the corner to be cleaned or burnt, depending on what was most hygienic. Her stitches itched and although they had been healed slightly by Anders, the wounds were deep into her shoulder muscles and ached more with every passing moment. Getting into the bath was painful as she was sore, and removing the slime that clung to her hair seemed to take an age. She tried to not let her mind dwell on everything that had happened, there was so much that had gone on and far too many of those things contained conflicted emotions which she couldn't be bothered to dissect and analyse. Pouring a jug of lukewarm water over her head seemed to shake her out the lull she had subconsciously slipped into. She inhaled deeply and pulled her wet curls from her face, squeezing the last of the bubbles and grime from her hair; she smelt so much better, a light scent of a random floral bouquet that Catherine had chosen filled the room and rested on her skin. Amelie got dressed into a light nightgown after clearing up the mess she had made; draining the bath wasn't particularly successful, and she spent twenty minutes having to rinse the sticky goop away from the edge. After completely destroying what had been her already filthy clothing she went back into the bedroom. Lighting a candle she sat down on the bed, watching the door and hoping that he would come back soon. She didn't want to sleep, but her body gave her no choice as she slipped into the fade. The candle flickered as she opened her eyes, brushing her hair away from her face as she sat up a little. Any normal reaction would have been to jump or scream, but she simply inhaled deeply in relief as she saw a familiar silhouette closing the door as he entered the bedroom. Glancing at the candle she could see that it had burnt down by quite a bit, it had been a fair few hours since she fell asleep. Her hair was still damp and laid thickly across her shoulder as she turned to look at him. The silence was comfortable between them but she could smell blood, fresh and dried. She got up and moved towards him as he unsheathed his sword, even in the weak light she could tell that it was caked in filth, a thick layer of grime. Fenris brushed his hair out his eyes and walked over to the armchair, falling heavily into it with a wince. The Mage watched him with a concerned gaze before leaving the room and returning with a bowl of water and several cloths. She doubted that he would want to get in the bath if he was so tired, but she could at least wash off some of the dirt. She wanted to say a hundred things and ask a thousand more, but she held her tongue. Answers would come in time. Kneeling in front of him she took his hand gently, expecting resistance and receiving none. She washed his palm and fingers so that she could undo his gauntlet with relevant ease. Amelie could feel the intensity of his gaze on her, he hadn't taken his eyes from her face from the moment she entered the room. She felt as if the tension was visible between them, the air charged. She kept dampening the cloth and cleaning his skin as gently as as she could, not wanting to aggravate his tattoos.
'I'm glad you came home,' she whispered, unable to keep silent any more. She didn't expect a reaction from him, Amelie could feel her pulse racing and she was sure he could probably hear how loud her heart was beating. Finishing one hand she went to remove his other gauntlet being careful of the cut that she had already sewn up earlier in the week, and noticed the wince cross his face as a large wound was revealed on his forearm. 'Oh Fenris,' she murmured looking at it carefully, it was at an angle and slightly deeper on the top end, as if Fenris had pulled his arm away from the offending weapon. Luckily Amelie had some foresight and had brought a spool of cotton and needle. 'This is going to hurt,' she said, wishing that he would say something, respond, acknowledge her in some way.
'Needs to be done,' he said after a few minutes after watching her thread the needle. His late reply made her jump and drop the spool, but she recovered well. She forced herself to have a neutral expression as she picked up the needle and began to work on sewing. He watched her every move, reminding her of a wolf that would stalk it's prey, she prayed to the Maker that she could get though the next few moments without doing something stupid. Amelie held her breath as she saw to his wound, finally tying it off and biting the thread loose at the knot. Her lips brushed his skin, slowly she exhaled, not realising that she had been holding it in. She pulled away, satisfied that he was going to heal well. She looked up at Fenris and smiled softly, trying to figure out what was going on his mind.
'What's the matter?' Amelie asked quietly. Her heartbeat picked up as her anxiety began to flood her body, her stomach dropped. 'Did...Did you not get him?' She added a little afraid, it would explain his mood to an extent. He didn't answer and simply stared at her, Amelie tried to shrug it off, smiling a little more forcibly. 'I mean, it's okay, I'm just glad you're-'
'-Home,' Fenris finishes for her. She almost jumped at his voice, not expecting it at all. Amelie tilted her head, his tone was dead and didn't reflect the storm she saw in his eyes. He leant forward, taking her face into her hands, he studied her closely, watching her facial features. 'Amelie,' he whispered, the mage couldn't help but lean into his palm, Fenris felt the fragility of her jaw and throat under his fingers. 'What... is this?' He said, his words heavy.
Amelie's breath hitched, she didn't quite understand what he meant. She hated herself for it, but she pulled away, she couldn't think when he was that close to her, it made everything feel different. She got to her feet and walked away from him. She brought her thumb to her mouth and bit the nail, wanting to throw herself into another world. What was he asking? What did he mean? Why was he being like this? What happened when he was gone. Amelie couldn't take the uncertainty. 'Depends... on what you want from me, Fenris,' Amelie says quietly facing the fire, as she leant against the mantle piece. She sighed, waving her hand as she spoke. 'I don't know what this is, I mean, I don't even know how long I'll be here. I... I don't know. All I do know is that.. I care for you,' she admitted. 'I think that much is obvious,' she laughed lightly, still not looking at him. 'What do you think this is?' She asks, directing his own question back at him. Amelie finally turned to face him and inhaled sharply as she hadn't even heard him move. He was almost right behind her, he was breathing heavily, his shoulders loose and head tilted. 'Fenris?' She murmured. The elf grabbed her wrists and pinned them either side her head, making her yelp in pain as her skin was pinched. Fenris pushed her against the wall, feeling her chest fall and rise with her rapid breathing. He stared deeply into her eyes, not relenting on her physically.
'What I think?' He says stiffly. 'I wish I knew,' he says grudgingly, his grip tightened on her wrists and she hissed in discomfort. It hurt but she didn't say anything. He pressed his forehead against hers. 'All I know is that you are on my mind. Always. You are just there,' he said with a sigh. Amelie whimpered a little as the pain is kicked up a notch, her stitches burnt, and muscles ached.
'What does that mean?' Amelie breathed. 'I don't-'
'It means that I want you,' he says letting her wrists go and cupping her face once again. Amelie bit her lip and breathed heavily, slightly scared of this man. She was frightened of what he could do to her, what he did to her emotions, her very being. 'I can not get you out of my mind, what did you do?' He asked forcefully.
Amelie felt a tear fall onto her cheek as she finally looked at him, her lip shaking, her voice broke as she spoke, the lump in her throat making it hard to talk. The conversation that she had with Catherine ran through her mind, before she went up the mountain. 'Fenris, I...' she said, trying to calm herself, he held himself tightly against her and his thumb brushed over her lip, feeling it shake. She shrugged a shoulder as she stared at him, refusing to let herself give in to her fear. 'I fell in love,' she whispered, a catch in her throat.
'Love?' He repeated, a little shocked as to what she just said. He wasn't expecting that, and it threw him. He dropped his hands and watched her shake. 'You... love me?' He says noticing that she had hung her head a little, and didn't reply to him. 'Amelie?' Fenris demanded grabbing her shoulders, she hissed again and nodded.
'Yes, for fucks sake, yes. I've already said! Maker, Fenris, stop,' Amelie snapped looking at him defiantly. 'I'm tired of this, just, say or do what you are going to do and just... do it,' she sighed, exhausted, in pain and horridly confused. She tried shrugging him off but he was holding her too tightly, come on Fenris, just say something, do something. Just stop holding me like this, it's putting me on edge, Amelie screamed mentally.
'Yes,' he says simply, cryptically. Amelie tilts her head as he raises his hand to cup her cheek. 'You,' he murmurs as he leans forward capturing her lips in a soft kiss. Her knees almost gave out in shock, he wrapped his arm around her waist, holding her up as he wound his fingers through her hair. Honestly she was expecting fire and deep passion like before, but this was different. It was sweet and longing, which somehow translated into something deeper. Fenris could taste the salt of her tears on her mouth, her body still hadn't recovered and it shook. Amelie returned the pressure he applied and gripped onto his arms, letting the moment take her. 'My Amelie,' he whispered breaking their kiss for a pause. Both of them panted in sync, hearts racing, the sweet, tender kiss had inflamed something more.