Chapter Twenty
Alexis didn't know what to think. Every ounce of postcoital bliss had evaporated the moment she'd truly been cognizant of what Fenton had called her in their last session. She'd thrown her clothes on and hurried out of the club before Fenton returned, so shaken by the possibilities, the what ifs, that she hadn't relaxed, hadn't stopped shaking, till she was safely back in her apartment.
Then the rationalizing started. And while almost twenty-four hours passed, while Fenton called and texted, asking if she was okay, Alexis tried to make sense of things.
She had been having one of the most explosive orgasms that have ever had in her entire life, so of course she hadn't heard it right. Or maybe she had, and it was all because her brain had put that particular word in her head at the moment? If someone thought about something, even if it was in the back of their mind, their brains could play tricks on them. It wasn't uncommon.
But what if it wasn't just her brain? What if she had actually heard it? How could that make any sense though? Sure, Fenton had pet names that he would call her during their sessions, but for him to choose that one specifically, seemed a little too unbelievable in Alexis' mind.
Of course, she could be wrong and it was just Fenton calling out any name her could think in that heated moment, but that didn't explain why his voice had changed. It was like for one moment, a couple of seconds, to be exact, Fenton's accent was gone and it was replaced with a new voice. One that, even though Alexis didn't understand, made her think of the person who had first called her Princess.
Kevin Ryan.
Alexis didn't want to be brash, because it would do her any good in the long haul. As her mind raced, she forced it slow down, making each little piece of information pop into her head for her to properly examine.
Kevin was the only person to ever call her Princess.
Kevin had moved out of the city and decided to try his luck in Boston. That didn't warrant any reaction at first, but the more she thought about it, the more something seemed to click.
Fenton O'Connell was too good to be true. Every single dom that Alexis had met turned out to either be a complete asshole who thought that they could make her theirs whether she agreed to it or not, or they simply gave her a glance over and turned their backs, unwilling to give her their time. At least they had kept their hands to themselves.
Fenton had showed up at the right time to save her from the asshole doms, and did so for no reason at all. None of the other doms seemed to care about what wasn't theirs, so why did Fenton care? Why would want her to be his sub when she was so new to the lifestyle and had little to no experience, unlike every other sub he was sure to have met at the club?
Why was she special? What had he seen in her?
Fenton O'Connell sometimes would act harsh one moment and like a new man, who cared for her in the next. Was that part of being a dom, to keep her on her feet, or what that just him keeping a secret?
Every variable and possible explanation paled in comparison to truth she'd never allowed herself to face. The truth that, even now, when she would have loved to come up with any other reason for Fenton to call her that name in that voice, she wished she could ignore. Fenton O'Connell had never been real with her. Maybe had never been real at all. She had subbed for a man who had been lying to her from day one and that man was Kevin Ryan.
As she walked back into the club, Alexis wasn't sure what she was going to say or how she was going to say it, and she wasn't sure how he would react to her just bursting through his door when they didn't have a session scheduled, but that didn't matter to her.
She needed to see him, look him in the eyes and actually see him. Now that she had all these thoughts running through her head, seeing him would only cement her suspicion. Or it would absolve Fenton of all the ugly accusations running through her mind.
Part of her wanted to be wrong, wanted it to just be her imagination running wild. The alternative would just be too much to handle. Not only would that mean that Kevin had been lying to her from day one, but it would also mean that Kevin had taken advantage of her emotionally and sexually, pretending to be another man.
Just thinking about it was making her sick to her stomach. The fact that Kevin had been touching her, kissing her, pulling pleasure from her body, made her pray that her suspicions were dead wrong. She'd never be so happy to be wrong.
She rapped on the door, and moments later it opened and she was met with the man that she had been spending countless hours with, and the truth hit her like a punch to the stomach.
He wasn't Fenton O'Connell. There was no Fenton O'Connell.
Those honey-brown eyes gazed at her confusion, then relief spread across his face. "You're a sight for sore eyes, gorgeous. You know I've been calling," his voice was that same sensuous lilt: elegant, round vowels mixing with a harsh New York accent. That exotic voice that never failed to draw her in like a moth to a flame.
She let her eyes drag over him, her mind running a mental tally and hitting the same conclusion time and time again.
Kevin with colored contacts and fake glasses.
Kevin with facial hair.
Kevin with an accent.
She was looking a Kevin Ryan. It had been Kevin the whole time. Had she really been that blind? Or did she just not want to see it?
It was like fire was pumping through her veins, and she was going to explode at any moment. She stared at him, almost in a trance. She was so livid, even more than she had been when she thought he was cheating on her with Jenny. This was a new level of disgust. And she had been too stupid to not figure it out sooner.
"Alexis?"
She didn't know how long she had been standing there, just staring at him, but apparently it had been long enough because now he pulled her by her elbow into his office, closing the door behind them.
"What's going on?" he asked, his hand still holding on tightly to her elbow. Suddenly that realization dawned on her and she forced her arms back from him.
"Don't ever touch me again!" she screamed, not caring how loud she was being or who might overhear her.
"Wow." He held his hands up. "What's going on?"
"It's over. I know everything now. I know about all your lies."
"Lies? I don't—"
"Drop the act, Kevin! I know that it's you!"
She watched as his eyes widened and his lips pressed together. In that fraction of a second before the mask came back down, she could see that she had caught him.
"Alexis, what are you talking about?"
"How could you do this to me? How could you use me like this?"
He shook his head. "I don't know what you're talking about, I really don't."
"I don't believe you."
"You don't have to believe me, but it's true. How could I be your ex and you not know it from the very beginning?" he tried. "I think you're stressing yourself out when you don't need to. Maybe you should go home, get some sleep."
"I don't need to sleep. I need the truth, Kevin."
"It's Fenton, not Kevin. It's important that you don't encourage this false idea that you have in your head. It's not healthy."
Alexis' vision went red, and before she knew it the office echoed with the sound of her hand slapping his face.
His hand went to his reddening cheek. "Jesus Christ—"
"I thought I was the bad guy. I thought I was the one who needed your forgiveness, but you were just playing me this whole time!" Alexis started to choke on her words, her emotions getting the best of her. "I can't believe you. I can't believe that you would do something like this!"
His teeth gritted together, his chest was rising and falling rapidly, and she could tell he was moment away from breaking. "What the hell are you talking about?"
"You took advantage of me!"
"I took advantage of you? Really?" His accent was gone. "You're the one who was practically throwing yourself at me—"
"I didn't know it was you, you piece of shit!" She didn't back down from his anger; the fury in his expression was oddly satisfying.
"You don't know a damn thing!" With a snarl, Kevin pulled off his glasses and tossed them across the office. "I lied to you the moment you stepped into this club, I did. I won't deny it, hell I can't anymore," he took some deep breaths before he spoke again. His chest wasn't rising nearly as quickly as it was before, but Alexis could still tell how angry he was because his hands were shaking at his sides. "I told you that I was Fenton O'Connell because I had to."
She scoffed. "Had to?"
"Yes, I had to. You aren't the only one working a case here," he said, his voice low as he closed his eyes. "I had to lie, but I didn't expect you to waltz in here, showing every inch of your body to anyone who wanted to look. Quite a few doms wanted you and I seem to remember intervening, keeping them away from you."
Alexis didn't know what to believe anymore. She didn't know whether to buy his excuse of working at the club for a case, because for one, he seemed to be too damn good of a dom to just be making it up off the top of his head. She shook her head. "Cause you're a hero? Please, the only reason you stopped them was because you wanted me all to yourself. Nothing like screwing over the girl who screwed you, huh?"
Kevin shook his head. "That is not why I did it. I never did anything to hurt you, I never did anything you weren't onboard for." Kevin took a step forward and pointed at her. "I understand your anger, I do, but don't you dare call me something that I'm not."
Alexis pushed his finger away from her face. "You see yourself as a protector, don't you? All I see you as is a disgusting excuse for a man."
His shoulders slumped, and she saw his jaw tense. A trait that both Fenton and Kevin shared. God, watching him was a mind-fuck of epic proportions. One moment, she saw Fenton in front of her, evident in the pressed lines of his suit, the dark honey of his eyes and the pout of his lips. In the next moment, it was just Kevin. Kevin looking at her with wrong-colored eyes and a mournful expression.
He tried again. "All I've ever wanted was to keep you safe and do my job here. I thought you were looking for a dom to play with. I thought if I could keep you occupied—"
"Is that what you're calling it now? Talk about a major revision." She spat. "If I had known it was you, I never—You could have just told me. You knew who I was the moment I walked in the door!"
"This is a classified assignment. I've been working for months to get where I am, and with our history and the fact that you've been acting batshit crazy every time you walk into this club—"
"Excuse me?" Alexis hadn't thought it was possible for her to be any more furious, but Kevin was quickly proving her wrong.
"Do you have any kind of idea what kind of attention you've drawn here? Jumping from man to man and asking all the wrong questions?" His voice lowered. "You put a target on your own back with this afterhours police work you've been doing, and Seth and Dominic aren't the only guys here who want to take a shot."
"I'm trying to track down a murderer! It's my job!"
He crowded her against the wall, covering her mouth with his hand. His voice was whisper-quiet, but no less harsh.
"Will you quiet down? It'll be really fucking hard for you to do your job when one of these assholes decides to put a bullet in you!"
She shoved him away with a snarl. "I can handle myself."
"This isn't about you being a badass or not, Alexis. This is about you taking your safety seriously."
She shook her head. She couldn't believe he was lecturing her after what she'd found out about him. "So how do you go from protecting me from these guys to shoving your cock down my throat, Kevin? Is that for my benefit, too?"
His nostrils flared, and his fingers curled into fists. "I didn't force you to do anything. You consented to playing. You had a safe word. You chose to participate at every point along the way."
"Except I had no idea who you really were!"
"No, you didn't know I was an undercover cop. But a criminal, a drug dealer, you're fine to play with a guy like that?" Tension was coiling in his frame. He was ready to explode, and she was ready to watch it.
"Between you and a drug dealer? Yeah, I'd take the dealer every time."
She watched his shoulders rise and fall with the effort of containing his anger. "You don't know the first fucking thing about my life."
"I know enough." She turned to the doorway, and jumped when his fingers wrapped around her arm, spinning her back toward him. "Don't you dare—" She gasped when he pressed her frame against the wall, one hand still on her arm, the other firmly gripping her jaw.
"We're not done here," he insisted. "Let me explain—"
Her knee made contact with his groin, and she aimed a right hook at his face when he freed her. He slumped to the floor with a cry. Her knuckles throbbed from the impact, but it was more than worth it.
"I'm done. Stay the hell away from me." She yanked open the door and rushed out of the club, all too aware of the looks she got from the other patrons on her way out.
"Hey, Espo," Alexis asked. "Have you heard from Kevin lately?"
They were in the car, on their way to questioning a person of interest in their latest case, a businessman named Andres Moreno. He owned several hole-in-the-wall restaurants in the city, and one of his former employees, Hector Johnson, had ended up dead in a dumpster. According to Hector's brother, Moreno had recently fired him.
Alexis doubted Moreno had anything to do with their vic's grisly demise, but hopefully he'd be able to provide some insight.
Javi's eyes widened at the sudden question. "Um, no. Not for a few months."
"Did he call you when you last spoke?"
Javier shook his head. "I called him. Hadn't heard from him since he'd moved to Boston, and I wanted to make sure he was doing okay." Esposito huffed out a breath. "Wasn't sure he'd answer honestly. I'd been trying to get a hold of him for weeks before he finally picked up."
Alexis frowned. "What changed?"
"He said he'd just gotten busy with work and he'd been meeting new people, but sometimes I think it had more to do with me threatening to come down there myself if he didn't pick up the phone." Javier sighed.
Alexis was silent as she mulled over Javier's words. She wondered if she should tell Javier the truth about Kevin's so-called move. It had to hurt that his friend wasn't speaking to him. They'd been thick as thieves for years, yet it seemed like Kevin hadn't even told him that he was going undercover. She wish she'd known the truth.
"What's this about?" Javier asked.
"Just wondering how he's doing," Alexis said.
"You miss him?"
She bit her lip. She didn't know what she felt about Kevin anymore. He'd been calling her daily, and had even shown up to her apartment a couple times. God, she wished she'd never allowed Fenton to come to her place. Heat sank through her cheeks as she recalled the way she'd cried about her loss, the things she'd confided to Fenton about Kevin. Had he had a good laugh about it later? About his ex in tears over him, over what she'd done to him, and unknowingly confessing it to him of all people?
Days after she'd learned about Kevin's betrayal, her anger was cooling and twisting to hurt and shame. It wasn't even necessarily about the sex anymore. She'd trusted him. She'd been vulnerable and emotional with him. And, for what? So he could get her back for hurting him one last time?
"You okay?" Espo asked.
She shook her head. "Sometimes I do miss him. But mostly I miss what we had."
"You'll find it again."
"How can you be so sure?"
"You're a catch. And as soon as you let yourself believe that, you'll have a line of guys out the door."
Alexis smiled softly. "You're a real sweet-talker, Espo."
He snorted. "Tell Lanie that, will you?"
They pulled up to the apartment building that housed their person of interest. "You ready?" Javier asked.
Alexis nodded. "Let's do this."
As Alexis turned down the hallway to her apartment, she tensed and a scowl twisted her face. She'd actually had a good day at work. Their new case had proved to be an excellent distraction from the calls and texts that had been lighting up her phone for the last four days. Until she'd gotten back to her apartment and found Kevin Ryan, donning his full Fenton O'Connell getup at her front door. The thick black glasses almost hid the bruising around his eye. Alexis found that she didn't feel an ounce of guilt for punching him.
His eyes landed on her, and he pushed off from the wall next to her apartment door, licking his lips. "Hey."
Kevin had a serious job to do. An undercover operation he'd clearly sunk months of work into pulling off. And Alexis had no interest in messing up his assignment. She wouldn't out him to the dirtbags that he was trying to take down. But there were codes of conduct for situations like Kevin's, and Alexis wondered what the people up the chain of command would think of his conduct while on the assignment.
Alexis ignored him, digging in her purse for her keys. As she slid her keys into the lock, he stepped closer, and she got a whiff of his cologne. Her heart skipped up into a new rhythm, and she was reminded of all the recent memories she had of being so close to him that she could smell his cologne. It brought a fresh wave of fury and shame, and she shoved her front door open a little harder than necessary.
"Hey," he repeated. "I'm sorry to barge in on you—"
She spun around to face him, taking in all the visual cues that made up his persona. He was even using Fenton's voice. "So this is all it takes for you to pass as a criminal? Colored contacts, glasses, and fake accent?" She wasn't sure why she was rambling. Wasn't sure what the question was in her babble. Except that now that the two men who'd previously inhabited different parts of her lives were in front of her, just one person, she didn't know what to think. Where to begin. "Is there any part of you that's real?"
"Alexi—"
She slammed the door in his face, glad that he hadn't tried to stop her. She wasn't sure she'd be able to restrain herself from hurting him again. She wasn't sure she even wanted to restrain herself.
He kept knocking at the door. "Alexis, please. Just let me talk to you." Seconds slogged into full minutes of him knocking at her door, begging her to hear him out. She changed out of her work clothes and into some loose-fitting gym clothes, put her headphones on, and began warming up with the punching bag in her bedroom. The music channeling through her headphones did a great job drowning out the man in the hallway.
An hour later, out of breath, with sweat dripping down her face and a satisfying ache in her muscles, Kevin was gone. He'd stuck a slip of paper into the seam of her front door.
When you're ready to talk, you know where to find me.
An address was scribbled below the note, and a crease appeared between her eyebrows. It wasn't the address of the club. Maybe this was where he was living now? She shook her head and crumpled up the note, but stopped before she could toss it in the garbage. Instead, she flattened it out and stared at it for another string of seconds. Then she went into her bedroom and found the box that had held her collar since their last scene. Just looking at the pretty, delicate necklace made her stomach churn. She scribbled the address on the box, wrote a quick response to his missive, and then tucked the note inside the box, just underneath the shining metal. The package would be returned to its sender first thing tomorrow, and there could be no mistaking her response.
Leave me alone, or I'm going to Beckett.
Alexis stepped toward the entrance to the club. Music was pulsing, and the line out the door showed that the Saturday night crowd was in full swing. It had been eleven days since the truth had come out, since she'd punched Kevin in the face and stormed out of his office. She'd hated the idea of coming here, of risking running into him, but she still had a case to solve, and more than ever she was certain she'd find the person who had killed that girl.
She waited in line with the rest of the clubgoers, dressed in her street clothes, the bag with her sub outfit held tight at her side. Her eyes kept glancing to the door, to the surveillance camera watching her. She wondered if Kevin knew she was here.
She got her answer when the security guard held up a hand as she tried to enter the club.
"You're not going in there," he asserted, gesturing for her to leave the line.
"Excuse me? I have the same right as anyone else to go in there."
He shook his head. "Not according to the man upstairs, you don't."
"What are you talking about? You don't even know me."
"Do I gotta spell it out for you?" he sneered. "You've been blacklisted. I got a picture of you last week with orders not to let you in. Now get out of here. Find somewhere else to go play, sweetheart."
Alexis thought about digging her feet in and pleading her case, but between the glare in the security guard's eyes, the complaints of the people in line behind her, and the cold surety that Kevin was the one who had done this, she knew better than to stay in the line. She walked away a few steps, then glanced back up at the security camera and flipped it the finger. Then she left, but not in the direction of her apartment. She had a different location in mind.
It turned out that Kevin was right; she was ready to talk and she did know where to find him.
It was nearing two a.m. by the time Kevin stumbled wearily up the stairs to Fenton's apartment. The night had been shitty and exhausting, the same way his nights at the club had always been before Alexis had started coming around.
As much as he felt like the bad guy for how things had fallen apart between them, and he had no delusion of not being the bad guy, he couldn't keep himself from looking for Alexis, even though he knew very well that she wasn't coming into the club anymore. He'd personally made sure of that. Still, his eyes caught on every redhead that walked into the club, and every time the realization, the disappointment, the self-loathing and aching worry was like a knife to his chest.
Kevin shook his head. It was for the best, for all sorts of reasons. He close to pulling the trigger on the whole operation. Close to securing the linchpin and nailing every filthy dealer and criminal involved in the club. Just a little longer. Then he'd be free, and he could be Kevin Ryan again.
He didn't know if he was excited or dreading going back to his life after over a year away. He wasn't even sure what his life would look like anymore.
Maybe once he was a real person again, he'd be able to talk to Alexis. Maybe he'd be able to get her to understand, to forgive him. Maybe. Or maybe she'd make good on her threat and turn him in to Beckett, after all. Maybe there was no going back for them. Maybe he'd been an idiot to ever think it was possible.
Kevin stopped in front of his door, digging his keys out of his pocket. As he pressed the metal into the lock, the door inched forward a little. Horror struck him then. His door wasn't locked; it wasn't even properly closed. Had someone broken in? His heart began pounding in his chest as he considered all the damning evidence, both legal and otherwise stashed in his apartment.
He stepped into his apartment, listening to the gentle clink of glass on glass. Someone was inside his apartment. He reached for the gun at his lower back, quietly slipping it from its holster and holding it out in front of him as he rounded the corner into the kitchen.
Alexis Castle was seated at the kitchen table, a tumbler and a bottle of Scotch in front of her. She didn't seem bothered by the gun pointing at her, and a smirk twisted her lips as she stared back at him. "Hi, honey. Welcome home."
With a ragged sigh and a new tension coiling between his shoulder blades, he flicked the safety back on and holstered his weapon as he approached the kitchen table. "Breaking and entering is a criminal offense, isn't it?"
She didn't even bat an eyelash. "You're not calling the cops. Wouldn't want to hurt your assignment, right?"
His eyes narrowed, and he tilted his head to the side as he watched her. "I believe endangering an ongoing investigation is also frowned upon."
"You blacklisted me."
"So?" he shrugged, and took a tumbler out of the cupboard then slid into the seat across from Alexis. He poured a finger of scotch into the glass; exhaustion was already pounding behind his eyelids.
"You're endangering my investigation," she insisted.
He swirled the amber liquid around the glass. "Does Javi know what you've been doing?" The silence that answered back was enough. He took a sip from his glass. "I'm inclined to remind you how dangerous it is what you're doing, but I have a feeling you already know."
"I can handle myself."
"Yeah, you did a great job of it when Seth and Dom were beating the hell out of you."
She shook her head, heat starting to rise in her cheeks. "It's easier to let them believe I'm vulnerable."
"You are vulnerable."
"I want back into the club. When my case is closed, you won't see me again."
"Absolutely not."
Alexis opened her mouth to argue, but Kevin cut her off. "And before you threaten to go to Beckett if I don't give you what you want, don't even bother. You want to go Beckett, you want to go to my boss, or IA, then do it. While you're telling them what I've done, you'll have to explain the part about exchanging favors with a suspect. That'll look really good in your case, huh?" He downed the rest of his drink. "Do whatever the hell you think you need to do, but you're not stepping foot in that club again."
"I'm not going to interfere with your assignment, Kevin. I have my own reasons for being there."
He snorted. "You think this is about my assignment? If all I cared about was my assignment, I would have left you to keep pissing off those idiots in the club until you were the one with a tag on your toe. Believe it or not, I actually care what happens to you."
"I'm going with not." She poured another finger of scotch into her glass.
"Why is it so impossible for you to believe that I don't want to see you get hurt?"
She didn't answer, at first. She simply stared into the depths of the glass like it had answers. Then she swallowed the full finger of scotch in one gulp, then wiped her lips and looked up at him. "Because I know you want to punish me for cheating on you."
Kevin reeled back in his chair like she'd hit him. Jesus. He shook his head. "No—"
"That's why you didn't tell me who you were. That's why you let me sub for you and let me think…" she paused. "Think that I had found someone who cared about me. And that's why you're keeping me out of the club now."
"Jesus Christ, Alexis." He huffed out a breath, anger morphing into self-loathing so strong he wanted to drown himself in it. "You really think that little of me? You think I would do…. You think all of that, all that time we spent together, every scene… you think I was setting you up for this?"
"You hate me. You've hated me for a long time now. It makes the most sense." Her words were flat, with no emotion behind them, like she'd completely divorced herself from any hint of feeling.
"No." He shook his head again, feeling his headache throb with every toss. "No. Never. You're wrong."
For the first time, she looked confused. "I'm wrong? About which part?"
"All of it!" His voice filled the space around them. "I don't hate you. And I didn't lie to you as part of some awful scheme to punish you or trick you. At first, I didn't tell you the truth because I wanted to keep you separate from my assignment, yes. And when we first started, I told myself I could do both. That I could keep you safe, give you whatever you were looking for, and keep my cover intact. That was wrong. I should have told you from the first moment I saw you in the club."
"And then what happened?" Alexis asked. "You said 'at first.' What happened after that?"
Kevin sighed. "I…" He stopped. How could he explain himself? How could he ever justify the lies he'd told her? He couldn't. He blew out a breath. "After the first couple sessions, I kept lying to you because I knew that if you knew the truth you'd hate me. And I… I loved our sessions, Alexis."
She shook her head, her eyes shining, her face flushed with anger. "You loved having someone to screw around with? Couldn't you have gotten that from someone else?"
"No. I couldn't. Because there's only one Alexis Castle." He licked his lips. "You are the only person I want."
She closed her eyes, just breathing for a moment, mulling over the words that had settled between them. "Is this some kind of sick joke?"
"Does it look like I'm laughing?"
"I don't understand. Why... " She forced her eyes open. "You hated me. You couldn't even look at me after—" She pressed her lips together, shaking her head. "And now, what? You wanna be fuck buddies or something? You think you can lie to me, say a few nice words, and everything will be just fine?"
Kevin took a chance and walked around the table so he stood next to her. He let his fingertips graze over the back of her hand. "I've broken your trust. And you've been keeping secrets of you own. I don't have any illusions about this thing between us." He let his fingers thread through her own, and she didn't push him away. "But I do care about you. More than you know. And I'm not going to let you put yourself in harm's way again."
"You don't get to tell me how to live my life, Kevin. It's not your call." She pulled her hand away from his, and he held on tight, not allowing her to retreat.
"But I do get to decide whether or not you're granted access to the club," he reminded her. "That is my call. And you can argue with me until you're blue in the face, but I'm not changing my mind."
"Fine." She stood, trying to yank her hand out of his, but he held on tight.
"Why do I have a feeling that you'll try to find some way around me?"
"What I do isn't your concern, Kevin. Not anymore."
"What if I want it to be?" he asked.
Her shoulders hunched forward, and she let her hair fall in front of her face. "Don't."
With a deep breath for courage, he reached for her face, gently tucking her hair behind her earlobe. Then his fingers hooked under her chin, lifting her gaze to meet his. He waited for her to lash out. To back away. To push him out of her personal space. She didn't. She just closed her eyes again, her posture stiff, her expression pained, like each of his words had dealt a blow. He leaned in and brushed his lips over her cheekbone.
"I'm so sorry I lied to you." He didn't try to justify it. He didn't try to explain away his decision. He release her hand, stepped back, and let his apology fill the space between them.
When she opened her eyes again, her expression was one of confusion. She blinked, staring at him for a moment like she'd never seen him before. Then she squared her shoulders and walked past him, heading for the door.
"Alexis," he said softly, not sure what he was hoping for or asking for. He just couldn't stand for things to end like this.
She stopped in the doorway to the kitchen and turned to face him. When she finally spoke, her voice was hesitant and a little sad. "I loved our sessions, too." Then she faced forward and left his apartment, shutting the door behind her with a slam.
Author's Note: Posting early since I'll be traveling this weekend. Oh, happy day! Please review.