Unbearded (Austria/Spain)
Sometime in the 16th century
Spain was the first person Austria saw when he awoke in the morning. His husband stood in front of the mirror in his nightgown, inspecting his chin with a rarely seen frown on his face.
"Antonio, what are you doing?" Austria murmured sleepily.
"I want to have a beard but my hair won't grow. I mean, I don't look like a child any more, so shouldn't I start to get more facial hair?" Spain furrowed his brow even more, apparently trying to detect hair on his chin that looked as if it would grow a little longer over time.
"What does it matter, anyway," Austria said, rolled on his back and tucked the blanket closer around himself.
"What does it matter?" Spain exclaimed. "Of course it matters! A beard is a symbol of honour, and losing your beard means losing your honour! I mean, in the poem, no one who tugged on El Cid's long beard would go unpunished!"
Austria sighed, pushing himself up to a sitting position. "Spain," he said. "Don't be foolish. Do you really think anyone's honour is defined by their beards? It is your deeds that decide whether you are an honourable man."
Spain glanced from Austria to his reflection in the mirror and back. He looked dubious.
"Anyway," Austria said in an ever so slightly irritated tone, "I'm going back to sleep." With determination, he rolled over to the bedside where no one was standing and tucked the blanket over his head.
Several years later, Spain's facial hair started to sprout. When he realised this, he stood in front of his mirror for long minutes, debating with himself whether he should finally, finally grow a beard. Yet all he saw was the irritation on Austria's face during their discussion about beards.
In the end, he shaved.
Notes
My theory as to why Spain is clean-shaved. (A beard would have fit the cliché about Spanish men, after all.)
El Cantar de Mio Cid (c. 1201-1207/1235) is a poem about the deeds of the Castilian nobleman Rodrigo Díaz de Vivar (c. 1041/47-1099) who is depicted as an idealised medieval knight. In the poem, beards are indeed a symbol of honour, and it is very important not to lose your beard—not to have it touched by anyone who isn't supposed to touch it, even.