Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer and JKR own all people, places, and things. I only own the plot.

HPOV

Over the past few days Edward seemed to have perked up a little bit. I would say he is back to normal because to be honest he has always been a little moody. I have been trying to advance our relationship but since the day in Snape's office he has barely touched me. IT IS DRIVING ME MAD! I am so sick of his old school mentality. I finally decided if you can't beat them, join them. I am going to seduce Edward Cullen. He is by no means easy to seduce but I have a feeling that I can give him exactly what he wants. Which is why I am currently standing in the bathroom in an early Twentieth century inspired dress. To me it doesn't even look remotely sexy but who I am to judge Edward's taste.

I finally gather enough courage to step out of the bathroom and notice that Edward doesn't even look up from the text he is currently reading.

"Ahemm." I clear my voice.

Nothing. Not even a twitch. He is still staring at his text.

"Hello Edward."

His head finally shoots up and then his jaw drops. Finally the reaction I have been looking for! I go to sit beside him crossing my legs in the chair and make sure I have a bit of ankle showing. The text I read assured my that men from the 1900's were crazy over women's ankles.

I again have to remind myself not to judge him too harshly.

"How was your day today, dear? I feel like I haven't seen you much since dinner." Pet names were also mentioned in one of the texts I researched on seduction.

Edward is still looking at me with his floored expression. I should have tried this ages ago! We don't have much longer until the rest of the family comes back.

"Honey, are you okay?" why is he still despondent?

He finally seems to be able to shake himself from his stupor.

"I am good Hermione. How was the rest of your day? You seem…. Um… like you were busy."

I was indeed busy. Do you know how long it takes to get into this ridiculous getup? Not to mention the horrible undergarments that somehow remind me of Pennywise the clown from Stephen King's It.

"My afternoon was wonderful. I was in the library tending to the books for the majority of it." I give him a small smile and try to appear coy. Another tip from the texts I read on trying to seduce him. Appear coy and not to abrasive. I wouldn't want to scare him away when I am slowly reeling him in.

"Oh that sounds nice." He states as he stares at my panty-hose clad ankle.

I knew it!

"Yes, it was quite an invigorating afternoon." I recross my legs so that my left ankle is now showing and is closer to his proximity.

He gives me a slight smile. That is right Edward. You know you can't resist to reach out and touch it. Do it. Do it.

" I talked to the family today. They should be here sometime within the next week." He states looking straight into my eyes. Damn! Focus on the ankle!

"Oh good! I know you miss them." I reach down and fiddle with my stocking to draw attention to where I want him the most. My feet.

Again, I am trying hard not to judge.

"Umm… Hermione?"

"Yes Handsome?"

"Why are you dressed like Mcgonagall?"

WHAT?! NO! He isn't supposed to associate me with an old professor! He is supposed to associate me with a 1900's sex kitten!

I am furious so I stomp back to the bathroom. My plan is foiled! Stupid old-fashioned vampire that doesn't know what he wants!

"Hermione? Are you okay in there? I didn't mean to upset you! You… uh… looked nice." way to save face Edward.

"I'm fine."

I am actually not fine. Not fine at all! I go to sit on the edge of the bathtub to commiserate in my failed plan when I notice an owl pecking at the bathroom window. I take the package and realize that attached to the box is a card with my name on it.

Hermione, I saw that this would work more in your favor. Good luck- Alice

I open the parcel and look at the contents of the box. Oh yes… this will do nicely.

EPOV

Hermione has been acting odd all afternoon. She told me she was fine but through the bond I can clearly tell she is upset. Why are women so complicated? I was shocked when she walked out of the bathroom looking like a mini clone of her favorite professor. Is this what I have to look forward for in the future? She doesn't age so I was wondering why she is dressed like an old lady? Perhaps I shouldn't have voiced my question but was generally confused as to why she kept practically shoving her ankle's in my face.

I sigh and lay in the bed working up an apology. For what? I don't even know. I can hear her scuffling about the bathroom. Is that fabric tearing? I hope to God that it is that awful dress she was wearing. I can barely hold back my shudder. I don't want to think about kissing Mcgonagall when I am making out with my Hermione. Eww.

I hear the bathroom door crack open and I ready myself for the groveling that is about to take place. That is until Hermione steps out and I lose all ability to think, let alone speak.

This girl is trying to kill me!

Hermione stands before me in Emerald green lingerie complete with a lacy bra and cheeky boyshorts. I can see a slight hint of nipple through the bra and the bottom swell of her cheeks hang out of the panties.

If I wasn't already dead I swear there would be no way to revive me. At least I would have died happily.

"I am sorry about getting so upset earlier." She speaks and she crosses the room heading in my direction. She opens her arms out to me but I don't know if I can even move.

"You. You. You look. You look."

"Edward, are you okay? You are not still upset at me are you?" she puts her arms down to wrap around her once she realizes I didn't step into her embrace. A slight frown marring her beautiful face.

"NO!' I yell at her.

Her eyebrows scrunch in confusion. Probably at my tone. I say I am not upset and yet I am yelling. Get it together Edward!

"Okay." she states as she makes her way to the bed. She starts from the bottom crawling towards her pillows at the top. Her delicious ass is up in the air and I can't help but watch as it sways side to side with every movement. I stifled a groan as she turns back around and lays her head against the pillow on her back.

I will myself to move slowly towards her. I crawl my way up the bed in the same manner as she did. I start from the bottom where her feet were slowly taking in every inch of her body. She is perfect. Absolutely perfect. I finally get to the pillows and hesitantly reach for her.

"You are so beautiful."

She reaches and hugs me tightly pressing her body to mine so that I can feel every inch of her.

"I am glad you are not mad at me. Sorry for my attitude earlier. I don't know what I was thinking."

"Of course I am not mad at you. I was just confused. I am sorry for being a clueless male." I tell her as I bury my face into her hair. She smells wonderful.

She lifts her head up and kisses me softly. Her hands trail up and down my back and it takes all I have not to cover every inch of her with my body and take her. While her hands find their way under my shirt I move to deepen the kiss. I swipe my tongue across her lower lip begging for entrance. Thankfully she obliges.

We kiss like that for a few minutes until she removes my shirt and rolls me over on my back to straddle me. There is no doubt that she can feel how hard she is making me. She starts to trace kisses down my face and suck on my neck as she slowly grinds her body on top of mine.

HOLY SHIT! This is it! I am about to lose my virginity.

With that revelation I lose all my will power to keep my hands stationed on her hips. They slide down and cup her ass as I grind her harder into my erection.

"Edward" she moans. It takes all I have not to flip her over and take her then and there.

My hands trail up her body and quickly make work of her bra so we are fully skin-to-skin from the chest up. I flip her over on her back and suck her neck as I make my way down towards her newly exposed breast. I have seen them once before but I can't get over how beautiful they are. I suck and need them until she is writhing under me.

My hands slowly make their way down and play with the top edges of her panties. Slowly dipping under them just barely every now and again. I look up asking for silent confirmation to continue. She nods in my direction and I lean in to kiss her as my hand reaches into her panties. I move my index finger to rub up and down her slick folds while I tease her clit with my thumb. She slowly starts to grind against my hand so I use my fingers to slowly pump in and out of her while my thumb keeps rubbing where she wants it the most. I am rewarded with more of her delicious moans. My hand keeps working her as I make my way back to her breasts. I continue to lick and suck while speeding up my movements. After minutes of working her over I feel her come undone around my fingers. I remove my hand from her sex and take my fingers into my mouth to taste her.

Hermione's eyes glaze over and the next thing I know I am on my back. Her hands unbutton my jeans and she slowly slides down the zipper. I lift my hips to help her move them down my body. Once I am free from all my clothes Hermione straddles me again covering my cock in her juices without actually entering her. She kisses my lips and then works her way down to my cock. She slowly runs her finger under the underside of it as she brings her mouth towards the tip. She works what she can into her mouth bobbing her head up and down while using her hand for the parts she can't cover. After minutes I feel like I can't take it anymore.

"Hermione, I'm about to…" My body releases before I can get the words out and she pumps me through my orgasm swallowing all that I have to give her.

I pull her up towards my face and kiss the hell out of her. I don't even care that she just swallowed my load. We are all tongues and teeth and I can feel myself getting hard all over again. I remove her panties and flip her on her back. She opens her legs exposing herself to me as I settle between the opening she created. I slowly enter into her as I let out a moan. I give her time to adjust before I start to move in and out of her. We slowly find our rhythm and she is giving me back everything I am giving to her. My right hand moves down her thigh to reach for her clit. Our bodies never once stopped moving as I slowly rubbed her. I can feel her start to tighten around me and I speed up my movements until I feel her come undone.

She flips us over until she is sitting on my cock slowly grinding away. My hands make my way to her breasts as I watch her move above me. I feel the coil in my stomach and I know I am not going to last much longer in this position. I am so deep inside her and she is so fucking tight. I move my hands to her hips and move her up and down at a faster pace until I finally explode inside her. She collapses on top of me keeping myself buried within her.

"That was amazing." She states as I rub my hands up and down her back.

"It really was, love." I tell her in agreement. We stay in position until we finally decide that it is time to clean up. She waves her wand and cleanse the bed and herself as I head to the bathroom to clean myself. After a quick shower I come back to find her sound asleep.

I lay beside her and pull her into my arms to hold her. I can't help but reflect on what just happened.

I am officially a man! I don't think I have stopped grinning since we finished. I must look pretty creepy but I can't help it. I finally had sex! I now know what all the hype is about! Sex is awesome! Sex with Hermione is awesome!

Hermione shifts in her sleep so that she is now facing away from me. I contemplate grabbing for her again but decide against it. Both of us are still naked so I make quick inventory of her every curve. She is gorgeous.

My glee is off the charts and I am suddenly glad that my family isn't around. Especially Jasper. I decide to go out on the balcony. I contemplate getting dressed but decide against it since it is late at night and no one can see.

I feel on top of the world right now and I only want to get higher. I stand on top of the balcony ledge knowing that if I fell I could easily save myself.

"I AM FINALLY A MAN!" I scream to the silent world around me as I throw my hands above my head like a true champion. Strangely a golden ball with wings fluttered past me. I believe Harry called it a snitch. I wonder what it is doing out here?

"MR. CULLEN!" Oh shit. Mcgonagall on her brooms reaches and grabs the snitch before it can once again get away. I know I should move to cover myself but I feel like I am frozen in place as her steely eyes meet mine. I can literally feel my balls trying to climb back inside my body

"I don't know why you feel the need to scream to the world what we can clearly all see but I suggest that you cease and desist from here on out."

She flies away before I can even mumble an apology. I work my way down the ledge still in shock over what happened Through the glass door I can see Hermione standing in shock. I guess my scream had woken her up. I walk through the door and just look at her. I can see that she is fighting within herself to hold back her chuckles. Approximately five seconds later she is rolling on the floor with tears in her eyes.

Still in my shocked state I reach over for my sleeping potion and swallow it in one gulp. I hope that my unconscious state let's me forget the fact that Deputy Headmistress Mcgonagall has now seen my dick.

I must have said that out loud because it set Hermione off again.

Fuck my life.