Saints and Sinners, Ch. 8

The crisp white sheets of the infirmary slowly came into view.

He struggled to focus.

He stared at the delicate hand that held his own, softly stroking his knuckles. He followed that hand up the length of the arm to the shoulder curtained in dark soft curls, to the pale beautiful face that burned with two opals. Her face.

"I'm so glad you're awake," she whispered.

"Christine," he murmured, his throat sore and dry.

Carefully she reached for a glass at his bedside and gently raised his head so he could drink. She lowered the glass and he raised his hand to gently encircle her wrist.

"Are you okay?" Adam whispered

She beamed at him and he felt his heart stutter. "I'm fine," she said, "You saved me."

His face grew troubled as he tried to remember what had happened.

"I heard your voice...You called to me. I could feel your hands on my…" Adam's right hand sought out the bandage that encircle his torso and he winced.

"I heard you, and I saw you," he said, and she smiled at him and nodded.

Adam struggled to sit up and she helped him arrange his pillows.

"Christine…" he began, as he struggled for the words, "Christine, I'm in love with you."

"Sh..." she soothed. "We don't need to talk about that now."

"We do," he said sadly. Her grey eyes met his green ones and his heart stuttered again.

"Christine, I'm in love with you, but I know you don't love me. Not in the same way. Not in the way I mean," he said. "I know that your heart belongs to Aramis, that it always has and likely always will. And I know that Aramis loves you as completely as you love him - And I'm happy for you, I truly am," he said, the words flowing quickly to hopefully make them easier.

"Adam," whispered Christine, giving his hand a squeeze.

"I love you Christine, so much so that I know I need to let you go. I know that I could never make you happy - not the way that Aramis does, and in the end, that's all I want – to see you happy, even if I'm not the one to make you smile the way you smile for him, the way you laugh when he's around, or the way your eyes sparkle when you see him return through the garrison gates," he choked out desperately. "I love you Christine enough to know that you belong with someone else; enough to know that I need to let this dream - that one day you might look at me the way you look at him - go."

A silence fell between them as tears slowly trickled down her face.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, "I do love you."

"I know, my friend," he said, and raising his hand to cradle her face, he wiped away her tears, "Just not in the way that I would wish." He smiled at her as his eyes began to close. "I only wish for you to be happy," he said. "Be with him."

Smiling at the man as he slowly fell back asleep, she leaned forward and kissed him, softly and chastely. "I will always love you, my friend," she whispered to him.

"And I will always be your friend," he replied as sleep took him and his eyes drifted shut.

oOo

Christine quietly closed the door of the infirmary; Aramis was waiting for her in the hallway.

"How is he?" he asked.

"Sleeping," she replied softly.

"Did he tell you he loves you?" Aramis asked sadly, his dark eyes worried.

She nodded and took Aramis by the hand. "He wants us to be together," she said with a smile that instantly eased the worry in his eyes.

"Christine..." he murmured as he brought her hand to his lips and kissed the inside of her wrist. "What happened here..."

"What happened here was terrible," she said seriously as she stared into the depths of his dark eyes, "But I will not let that stop me from living my life. There are saints and sinners among all of us, Aramis. I refuse to let the thought of what might have been ruin my life. I am strong Aramis, and with your love and support I have nothing to fear; I am stronger because of it," she said, and kissing him deeply, they left the garrison, their hands clasped tightly together.

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A/N: Thanks for reading!

This was a story I really struggled with. I wanted to show the dangers for a woman working in a "man's world" like this. Not all musketeers can be good guys. I wanted to show the others realizing and acknowledging this threat and their reactions to one of their own showing that they too are capable of horrible things. Mostly, I wanted to show that Christine could get past it; that she wouldn't let this traumatic event stop her and she could walk away from this stronger.

Once again, thank you for all your encouragement throughout this story. Your feedback is truly valued.