The bed springs squeaked below him as Kurt curled his fingers around the cool metal bedframe and clung to it for support. He felt hot breath against his neck, a strong hand firmly gripping his hip, and the unrelenting pounding of Rod's cock as it repeatedly slammed into Kurt's sensitive asshole. Kurt was letting out moaning cries of distress, but he hoped very much they could pass as pleasure. He squeezed his eyes shut but Rod just growled at him.

"O – open. I want to see – to see them."

Kurt opened his eyes again and looked up at the man currently fucking him with vigor and stamina that was not his own. Kurt knew his current predicament was due to some little blue pills Rod had popped as Kurt walked into the room this evening. There seemed to be something wrong though. Rod easily got hard, but he was having trouble finishing. Something that was now causing Kurt to be pounded like a lump of dough in the hands of a frustrated and overly zealot baker.

"R- rod. Rod." Kurt's voice stuttered in time with his body being rocked up and down the bed. "Maybe ta - take it – it slow – slower. Draw it - out, baby." He hoped he sounded confident in what he was saying and not just desperate for a respite. "Look at m -me, and just go easy, it w- will come."

Kurt reached his free hand up to cup the back of Rod's neck drawing him in for a kiss as Rod panted, but slowed his motions a little. "That's right. We aren't in a rush. Just enjoy yourself." Kurt whispered into his client's lips. Kurt was panting himself, covered in a fine sheen of sweat and his ass and cock aching. He'd been half-hard for half an hour, he could only imagine how frustrated Rod was feeling.

"Do you trust me, babe?" Kurt learned quickly which clients liked the pet names. Rod loved them. Though not even that was helping tip him over the edge tonight.

"Yeah, yeah." He chuckled a little, "You're the professional."

Kurt smiled seductively up at him, though that compliment sat uneasy in him. He wasn't sure this was something he wanted to be a professional at, though he was well past the point of no return on that.

"Then here," Kurt said as he wrapped his legs around Rod's waist pressing his heels gently against Rod's back to pull him in. That made his cock dig deeper and Kurt let out a little gasp.

"I love that sound form you." Rod said, his cock deep inside of Kurt.

"Well, if you just roll your hips, smooth and steady," Kurt instructed rolling his own hips upwards, "You'll hear that a lot more."

Rod smiled and started rolling his hips - a little hard at first - but then he got the idea. Kurt's hand moved down Rod's back and the he leaned forward so he could grab his ass. "Oh baby, you feel so good inside me." Kurt breathed, he kissed him again and again before moving his lips to nuzzle in the curve of his neck. He let out a little gasping sound again now that he knew Rod liked that, "That's right baby, you're so good to me."

Kurt mentally rolled his eyes at himself, but Rod liked the encouragement and Kurt was getting good at his job. Rod was breathing heavily and started making little whining noises. Thank god, that should mean he was close.

"You're – you're so sexy." Rod muttered, his voice hitched and needy.

Kurt slowly ran his lips along Rod's neck and up his jaw to his ear and then whispered, "Come for me, baby." At the same time Kurt followed a suspicion he had, his fingers moving to the cress of the man's ass and then pressing one finger just knuckle deep in his hole.

Rod gasped, and bucked, and then let out a long guttural groan as he started to come. His face twisted in pleasure as his hands on Kurt tightened their grip. Kurt might have Rod's fingerprints on his hips in the morning, but at least he'd finally come.

Kurt was still whispering reassurance in his ear as Rod finished, he sighed and then let go, collapsing his full weight on top of Kurt. He was so still, and such a dead weight on top of him that for a split second Kurt was terrified the older man had a heart attack or a stroke or something, but then he heard him laughing.

"You are really good at this."

"Thanks," Kurt squeaked out still pinned under him. "Roll over babe, a guy's got to breath."

"Oh," Rod laughed and rolled over.

Kurt took in a long deep breath before he turned to face his client who was watching him with a dopey half-drunk expression on his face.

"You didn't come." Rod said his hand drifting to Kurt's half-erection, fingers trailing over it causing goosebumps to rise on Kurt's skin.

"Mmm, well that's not what you're here for is it?" Kurt said with a yawn, hoping Rod wasn't going to try to jerk him off. He really was fine with things ending here for the evening.

"I guess not." He pulled his hand back.

They laid there in comfortable silence for a moment and Kurt wondered if Rod feel asleep and if so, was he expected to stay and sleep here with him?

"I'm going out of town for a few months – business. Will you still be here when I get back?"

He was awake after all.

"I should be." Kurt said, and tried to hide his regret. If he was here his full eight months Kurt still had over six of them left.

"Good. Good." Rod ran a hand slowly down Kurt's side, watching him with something almost possessive in his expression, and then hopped up from bed, cleaning himself up a little, and finding his clothes. Kurt sat up and watched him.

"I really enjoy your company," Kurt lied, well it was a partial lie, he didn't really enjoy any of his clients, but Rod was a safe person to have as a regular, so that counted for something.

"I think you know I enjoy yours." Rod winked, now fully dressed, "I'll see you when I get back in town."

"Great."

Rod left the room and Kurt sighed and fell back on the bed. He was exhausted. He been working at the Carousel for nearly seven weeks now. Actually, it had been forty-six days exactly. In that time he'd had a total three days off – days still spent in Pantone – but without any of his usual responsibilities.

Days off were doled out to the ponies randomly and without any apparent schedule. But when you got one, you took it. To rest your mind as much as your body. None of the ponies received many days off, but if Kurt seemed to get a less than the others, he wasn't going to say anything. Sebastian turned his dislike for Kurt to ignoring him lately – besides the fact that he learned of Kurt's love for coffee and had cut him off – so Kurt wasn't going to rock the boat.

Kurt was almost drifting to sleep himself, he should get up, clean off…. He yawned again, his eyes falling closed. He would get up in just a minute…

"Kurt?" A quite voice drifted through Kurt's sleepy thoughts. "Kurt?"

Kurt blinked open his eyes to find Blaine standing near the bed looking down at him, his lips tipped in a small smile and his cheeks flushed like he was blushing. Kurt looked down to see he was stretched out on the bed fully nude, but it wasn't as if it was the first time Blaine had seen him so exposed.

"Quick shower and a change of clothes and then you can sleep in your own bed." He said softly, as if he hated having to get Kurt up when he was so comfortable.

"Ugh, do I have to move?" Kurt whined.

Blaine's eyes widened, "Are you hurt?" He asked quickly.

"No, no. Just so tired." Kurt said even as he forced himself to sit up. He got off the bed, used some wet wipes to do a cursory cleaning, and then reached for the robe Blaine was holding out. Once wrapped in the silky fabric he let his eyes slip halfway closed and stood so close to Blaine he could lean on him a little. "Lead on." Kurt said through a yawn.

Blaine brought him down the old familiar hallway, and Kurt felt like he was partially sleep walking.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

"I am. Promise. I'm going to sleep hard tonight."

"You need a day off."

"Yeah… that would be nice. But if I'm working I'm making money, so that's a silver lining."

"Hmmm." Blaine didn't say anything, but it didn't seem like he agreed.

Kurt showered and then drank the water Blaine brought him because Blaine insisted he needed it so that he didn't get dehydrated. He plopped into bed as Blaine stood by the door of his room.

"I'll let you sleep now, if you don't need anything else."

Kurt looked at him standing silhouette against the light in the hallway and a warm happy feeling filled his chest. He wanted to ask Blaine to stay. He wasn't sure what for, it was just nice to have him around, but in the end just wished him a goodnight.

"Goodnight, Kurt." Blaine said with a sweet smile as he closed the door behind him.

Kurt smiled and buried himself in his covers, falling asleep with the sound of Blaine's voice a tender thought running though his sleepy mind.

Kurt sat down at the last open space at his friends' table. In truth, he was friendly with all the other ponies, they were a close knit group, but a handful of them were Kurt's particular friends. Wes, David, Jeff and Elliot were his regular group. Today even Thad had joined him. Thad often kept to himself and Kurt and the other guys respected that, but Kurt found he really appreciated Thad's steady and calm personality when he did grace them with his presence.

This morning though, when Kurt sat down for breakfast he could immediately tell something was off. Everyone was quietly eating their food and hardly making eye contact.

"God, who died?" Kurt asked feeling nervous as he looked around the table at his friends.

"No one." Wes smiled and tried to break the tension. "Nothing that drastic just a little… disagreement among friends."

Jeff let out a huff, "Yeah, if you can call everyone ganging up against me a disagreement."

"We aren't ganging up against you, Jeff." David said, and he sounded tired like he'd said this before, "We're your friends, we are just trying to look out for you."

Kurt stirred his yogurt and oats and looked down at his plate, he had a feeling he knew what this was about and he didn't want to get involved.

"I bet Kurt would understand." Jeff said. "He believes me."

Kurt groaned internally, no luck in staying out of this then. "Um… I'm not sure what you're talking about." Kurt said, though he did.

"Nick. My boyfriend." Jeff looked around the table as if daring anyone to disagree with him. No one said anything but there were meaningful looks.

"Boyfriend?" Kurt asked, and glanced at David hoping he help him out. "I didn't know you had a title."

"He was here last night and he asked if we could be, and I said yes, of course."

Kurt nodded.

"The boys are again trying to tell me not to trust Nick and that he is just a client and that he couldn't possibly be in love with someone like me-"

"That is not what we said." Wes tried to interject but Jeff just continued.

"They act like they know him. But they don't know him. He only comes to see me. We're together. And we'll still be together when my contract is up and I'm out of here." Jeff's voice was wobbling, he sounded angry and hurt.

Kurt just nodded at stawberry.

"So you agree with me then?" Jeff asked looking at Kurt expectantly. Kurt again glanced around the table looking for a lifeline. He had purposefully not said anything about Jeff's relationship with one of his regulars when it was brought it up. His other friends had made their opinions known and Jeff hadn't listened. What could Kurt say that could possibly change his mind?

The truth was, no Kurt didn't think their relationship could be real. They saw each other only once every couple of weeks and had no idea what the other was like outside of their paid time together. Nick could be a liar and a horrible person leading Jeff on, or he could think he meant what he was saying even though they had no real test of their relationship in the real world.

The thing was though… what was the point of saying any of that to Jeff? Part of him wanted to try to talk some sense into his friend, to save him from future heartbreak. Another part of him knew Jeff was way too far gone. Nothing anyone said would change his mind. It would just make him feel alone and abandoned by his friends in a place that already made you feel very alone and ostracized.

"Kurt?" Jeff asked again his eyes pleading with him as if having just one person in his corner would mean the world to him.

Kurt sighed and sat his spoon down. "Well… like you said, none of us know him. You do. And I believe you love him."

"But not that he loves me?" Jeff snapped.

"I… I don't know." Seeing the hurt in Jeff's eyes, Kurt made a split second decision. He wasn't going to tell Jeff not to feel the way he did for Nick. He wouldn't be able to convince him anyway and honestly if this… relationship, for lack of a better word, helped Jeff get through his time working the Carousel who was Kurt to try and steal that from him? If Nick wasn't true, then heartbreak was coming, but it would come when Jeff was out of this place, with money in his pockets, and better equipped to handle the truth.

"I think if you know him and we don't then I can't really sit here and say I know for sure how Nick feels. I'm just happy you have someone who makes you happy." Kurt said with a shrug and a glance at David and Wes who both seemed disappointed in Kurt's response but didn't say anything. Thad was the one looking studiously down at his food now. Elliot rolled his eyes.

Jeff's eyes looked a little misty, but the smile that over took his face was bright. "Thank you, Kurt. It's nice to have one real friend here." He gave the other boys a pointed look and stood up from the table, walking away to discard his tray.

Kurt groaned and quickly followed after him. "Jeff." He stopped him at the cafeteria doors. "Don't be mad at them just because they aren't saying what you want to hear. You know those guys love you. They're trying to protect you."

"They're wrong about Nick."

"Their intentions are good. You know that."

Jeff chewed his lip and looked back at the table to his friends. "Yeah… yeah. I know."

"You have what… four months left on your contract? You need your friends, don't stay mad too long."

Jeff nodded, "Yeah… okay." He smiled, "Thanks Kurt. And for the record… I think your relationship, even if it may be frowned upon, I think it will work out too." With that, he squeezed Kurt's arm and left the room.

Kurt stood in complete confusion for a moment. Kurt's relationship? Did Jeff think Kurt was in a relationship with one of his clients? Kurt felt a little disgusted at the thought. He turned away and joined the table again.

"Before you say anything," Kurt held up his hand, "I know the chances of him and Nick being together after this is slim to nothing. But Jeff needs this."

Everyone looked to Wes. He was their unofficial leader after all.

Wes sighed, "Yeah… I can see where you're coming from. I just don't want him to be crushed when he leaves this place and Nick kicks him to the curb."

"If that happens he is going to be crushed regardless."

"Kurt's right." Thad spoke up. "We've told Jeff how we feel, to keep bringing it up is just beating a dead horse. At this point, we just have to be there for him and not push him away."

There was a reluctant agreement around the table.

"I get out of here after Jeff, but let me tell you when I do and this Nick character has hurt my friend?" Elliot laughed darkly, "I know some guys who could really make him regret it."

"You wouldn't hurt Nick…"

"Damn straight I would."

Kurt lifted his brows in surprise, he hadn't seen this side of Elliot before, but the intensity of his eyes told Kurt he wasn't kidding.

"I get out of here first, so I can even be here to pick Jeff up when his contract is over. And any of you too if you need it." Wes added, "I know that things are going to be different out in the real world, but I plan on being here for any of you. If that's something you'd like."

David grinned at everyone around the table, "Yeah, I agree. Friendships forged through fire and all that."

Kurt smiled, he never expected to make friends like this here, "How much longer do you have, Wes?"

"Just over a month." Wes said with a wide smile. "I'm literally counting the days."

Kurt was happy for Wes, of course he was, but he also couldn't really picture this place without him. Wes was the glue who kept them together. None of the ponies here had been here without him, he'd been at the Carousal longer than any of them.

The conversation turned to less sensitive topics and Elliot looked at Kurt. "Your support of Jeff and Nick, it isn't because you are hoping for your own happily-ever-after with someone you met here, is it?"

"What?" Kurt looked at Elliot in disgust and disbelief not even noticing that the other guys at the table also seemed to be listening for Kurt's answer. "You think I want to be with any of the men I've had as clients? God no, I am going to scrub every last one of them out of my brain once I'm out of here."

Kurt looked around the table, no one was meeting his eyes like they knew something he didn't.

"Is there some rumor going around about me and a client? Jeff said something too. I assure you-"

"It's not a client." David said.

"What?" Kurt just wasn't following.

Elliot cleared his throat, "Listen Kurt, it's not the same as falling for a john… still, be careful. He isn't one of us and I doubt any relationship you start here will have meaningful value out in the real world."

"I honestly have no idea what any of you are talking about." Kurt really didn't. He wasn't in a relationship with anyone.

"Okay." Elliot held up his hands in surrender, "Forget I said anything."

"No." Kurt was getting frustrated, "Tell me what you mean."

"It's your Shadow, Kurt." David chimed in again.

"My… you mean Blaine?"

"We've just noticed you two seem close." Wes said giving him a sympathetic look.

"I mean… he… Blaine is my – Shadow." Kurt stopped himself from saying 'friend' remembering that Blaine had said he wasn't allowed to be friends with the ponies. "He helps me out. Like your Shadows do too. I mean… he sees me at my most vulnerable and I… I trust him. That's all. Nothing is going on there."

"Good." David smiled, "I'm glad to hear that."

"Sorry Kurt, I must have misread the situation." Elliot added.

"You did." Blaine was his friend. He wasn't afraid of the ponies knowing that, as long as it didn't get Blaine in trouble. But there wasn't anything more to it than that. It was friendship. That was it.

"Having a good Shadow makes a world of difference here." Wes said, "I'm relieved to hear you aren't developing feelings for him though. And if he is for you… well, that's not really your responsibility is it?"

"Blaine doesn't have feelings for me." Kurt felt… he wasn't sure how he felt. This conversation was making him flustered. He suddenly realized what Jeff meant by feeling like his friends were ganging up against him. They didn't understand.

"I mean…" Elliot started and trailed off meaningfully.

Kurt looked around the table, everyone had a look on their face as if Kurt was wrong and they knew better. "You mean what, Elliot?"

"He looks at you like… like you hung the moon, Kurt. He's eyes get all big and round and loving."

"No." Kurt shook his head, his throat feeling tight, why did he feel like he wanted to cry right now? "Blaine's eyes are just like that. He… he's like a puppy."

"Okay. We were wrong. My bad."

"His rotation has to be up soon anyway." Thad cut in before Kurt cold snap at Elliot for not sounding sincere. "So if he does have a little crush, or whatever. It won't matter when you get your new Shadow."

"Wait… what?" Kurt asked, he didn't follow, but somehow understood Thad had just said something terrible.

"A lot of the staff here work on rotation, because the hours are so long. Most of the Shadows, the managers. They are on a few months and then off a few months. In fact, I think even Sebastian is only here for what… a few more weeks before he gets leave? I don't remember." Thad shrugged, "Anyway, I got a new Shadow just last week because mine went home. You didn't notice they come and go?"

"I…" Kurt's heart was beating too heavily, his tongue felt slow and heavy, "They all wear black and fade into the background… I didn't…"

"Don't worry. All the Shadows are well trained. You could ask Blaine when he rotates out so you aren't surprised by a new face."

"Oh." Kurt's head was spinning he was trying to picture his life here without Blaine. Some other random person was going to be there after his time with a client? No. He hated that. How could Blaine not have said something? Then through his near panic something else Thad said finally sunk in. "Wait, Sebastian will rotate out?"

"God, I forget sometimes you didn't really have an orientation when you first started." Wes shook his head, "You didn't know?"

Kurt's emotions were a mess – two very different feelings warring inside him. Alarm over losing Blaine and utter joy at the thought of Sebastian being anywhere but here. "Well, maybe there is a god." Kurt joked and everyone laughed.

Kurt finished his breakfast – though he didn't eat much, he stomach suddenly felt a little queasy – and tried to hide his unease. How much longer before Blaine wouldn't be here to comfort and listen to him, to be by his side? Was he really going to lose the best friend he'd made while in this awful place? Someone who made him laugh and feel safe even when the world was turning sideways all around him? He needed to find Blaine. They had to talk.