It's been a week since that whole episode with Primus, and I've been giving it a lot of thought.
Being a Prime takes a lot of responsibility. I admit that I'm not ready to go back to my dimension. I don't think I ever will to be honest. The expectations of school are just too much, the expectations of being a Prime however...
If I go back to my dimension than I might forget all of this and I really don't want to. With team Prime, I can be myself. I feel like I stand for something, and they need me. But I know that in time, I'll miss being normal. I'm not sure how long I have until I have to make up my mind.
I've just been pacing around the halls of the base when Miko came up to me.
"So, I gotta know", she said, "What did he look like?"
"Who? Primus?" I asked.
"Yeah."
"He was really tall. He was silver like chrome and it looked like he was glowing underneath his plating. And he had some kind of glowing mist that seeped from his hands. Not as deep of a voice as Optimus."
"Same personality?" she asked.
"Eh, he was a little different than Optimus", I answered.
"How so?"
"Umm...dunno. It's hard to explain. He's just as serious but not the same chilling sensation as Optimus."
"Ah", she said, "What do you transform into?"
"A kind of dragon-looking thing", I said. I transformed and struck a pose with my wings spread out, my head held high, and my tail curling up. I trotted around in a circle so she could get a good look.
"Awesome!" she exclaimed.
I transformed again back into my bipedal mode and we talked a bit more.
We talked for what seemed like hours while walking around. We laughed at each other's jokes and told funny stories. She distracted me from the troubles from the past week. We did the impressions of some of the 'Cons and Miko's impression of Starscream is glorious. I never had this in high school. I was always that lonely quiet kid at the back of the class that never talked. I hadn't had this kind of conversation in years, this conversation flowed from one topic to another and never stopped. I just kind of separated from my friends over time. I started to feel like me again. The "me" before my parents became helicopter parents. Before I started to see the world from a different angle. Before my depression and anxiety became apparent. Before I felt lost.
"You okay?" Miko asked.
"Yeah", I said, "I just haven't had this in a while. When I reached high school, my parents became helicopter parents and I just pushed everyone away because I had to talk to them to get to know them and I didn't have any excitement. It just wasn't me. My parents said they didn't want me to get all A's, that they wanted me not to fail yet I was passing all my classes and they yelled at me every night. I was scared of them. I don't understand why they couldn't see the pain they were causing to their own daughter."
I looked down at Miko to see worry and sympathy in her eyes.
"Um, s-sorry for ranting like that it-it feels good to get it off my chest and actively talk to someone about", I stuttered, "but I'm fine now. I have a purpose and I'll be on an adventure soon."
"I kind of felt the same way", she said, "My life was quite boring. Nothing ever happened. I wanted something new, which is why I transferred to Jasper. And then I met the bots and I've never felt more alive."
It was astonishing how alike we are.
The sound of foot steps interrupted our conversation as Arcee came up to us.
"I'm going on recon with Jack if you want to come, Katie", said Arcee.
"Sure", I responded, "be nice to get out the base for a bit. Can Miko come too?"
"Recon's usually boring", Miko said, "I'll sit this one out."
"Kay then, suit yourself", I said. I followed Arcee through the halls and into the main chamber where Ratchet was readying the ground bridge with Jack not too far away. You might say that I can just ask Ratchet if I can go out for a fly but my social anxiety says "NOPE".
Wait I thought if Jack is coming and this is recon than...uh oh. I hope it isn't what I think it is! I'm not ready!
The ground bridge opened up and Arcee nodded toward it, indicating to follow her. The ground bridge was mesmerizing in reality. Bright green streaks of light with blue, red, and silver swirled together in a funnel leading to nothing in particular.
My first mission. This was going to be great.